well hello All You Beautiful [Music] People you know what time it is ladies and gents Guys and Dolls and everyone in between gather around get you something real nice to sip on and comfy to slip on cuz it's time for smut Club here's your hosts Chelsea and [Applause] Hannah hey everybody and welcome to smut club I'm Hannah and I'm Chelsea and this is this the podcast where we the podcast the podcast no other podcast needed we are the podcast Jesus wept where we talk
about smut yes we are two licensed therapists mental health therapist if you can believe it I don't know why I said that shocking and we review um romance novels of varying levels of trash and general overall caliber um and we we share those with each other yeah what an intro we did it oh my God maybe our strongest start yet yeah yeah I feel really good about it but also I'm not quite sure what episode number this is I want it's like we're around episode 70 if this is not
episode 70 we are around 70 so I'm also assuming if you're just clicking on episode 70 you're not you might not be starting here this might not be your first introduction yeah like you get it yeah so you're like well of course they're therapist and you're not like oh wow and if you are well welcome welcome we're so glad you're here yep grab a glass of wine and uh that's what we are drinking today um not Boda box we normally are drinking well no you are drinking B box drinking B box I'm drinking
Kirkland cuz they didn't have any B of red what yeah my husband was like I had our toddler like he he was shpping he's like Chelsea I had our toddler with me I grabbed the Rosé I couldn't find any bat of red so you got Kirkland and he's like what does it taste like and I was like it tastes like red wine like whenever you think red wine yes that like not like a you're not going to say like an oky red we're not adding any words to it we're just going you want some red wine and this is what
it tastes like yeah so grab a glass sure join us uh what book are we reviewing today I didn't I this was this one is all Hannah Titan BY Jillian Graves okay I don't know this one I you're gonna vely threatening I didn't mean it like that until it was out of my mouth and Titan is like a powerful name it is a powerful name for a powerful dude so for the setup this is a um from the like cover of the book this is a daddy Dom gargoyle romance so we're slipping into paranormal and we're um going to be
exploring some Kink okay full disclosure um I was not sober when I outlined this so are you sober now not [Laughter] especially so who knows who knows what's going to happen um I'm so glad everyone is along for this journey on stuff your Kindle day I feel what's it called EXO EXO daddy or something uh it is like a little dump sort but like I don't mind Kink uh I tend to enjoy reading books that have Kink honestly I think you can only read so many like college romances of kids doing
missionary before you need you can only get through so many sports romances where they bang in the locker room before you're like all right like yes um none of that's really relevant I'm just going to stop myself before we get too I really thought you were going somewhere else but okay I did too um but I am recognizing that I am also not exceptionally sober right now so exceptionally sober for everyone's sake so yeah uh for those listening and not watching Hannah's wearing this like
super cute crop top that has like a little tie on the front and she just like tightened the knot like she was getting down to business uh in the best way where she's like okay we're about to get into this that was the equivalent of a man pulling up his sleeves before he like you know okay so Titan is following a man that he believes has stolen a very important magical object um he is a gargoyle he was created by witches 700 years ago to protect magical artifacts
that's like his purpose in in being um and and so the key so he was created he was created yes um along with several other gargoyles who all have the same purpose and Mission okay uh but he's like their leader so the key to what is called The Relic room was stolen and so he has been searching for centuries for this key it's really important all of these artifacts are now lost because the Relic room is like on a different plane like it's not an actual place it's like a
separate Dimension that the witch is created right so he sees the guy um who appears to be on a date um which was arranged online on a sugar baby website um like the guy he's following is on a date that was arranged on a sugar baby website yes so so the guy is on a date with a sugar baby and um he is like watching this girl and he's like oh damn like okay and he sees her like the guy is doing something on his phone or something I don't exactly remember but
he sees her like jot down like a note or something and he realizes she has the information that he needs this guy is like inviting her to a party and like bragging about his collection of artifacts cuz he collects historical stuff and so he's like I'm pretty sure this girl has what I need um and he's like like in a she is like a spy trying to get that info or just like oh the guy just gave it to her so conveniently she has okay it's just the opportunity she took okay
yeah just wanted to make sure this was not going to be another like double spy situation feel like we've read a couple of them she is not a spy she's definitely not by um but he's very attracted to her and he's like well we're going to have to set that aside because like the key the mission is the most important thing and so Jewels is our main chick so it's dual point of view so Jewels is going on a date as a sugar baby what's the gargoyle's name Titan oh that's just his
name yeah I thought it was a a state of being it's both it can be both you know touche um feels a little little on the nose but a little bit subtlety is not the point of this book right okay that's great for me to know with the questions that I ask that you'll be hey Chelsea it's not that deep no one no no there's no subplot here we are just straightforward okay we're fully sending so Jules is going on a date as a sugar baby M um she is a former Child Star and
she really needs the money she is um currently in a legal battle with her mother for her trust so her mom like all the money she earned as a child star went into a trust and now her mom is saying that basically Jules is not of sound mind um and should not have access to the trust is this book Loosely based on Britney Spears I don't know but I'm pretty sure I did throw in a hashtag free Brittney in my notes somewhere so we'll get there cuz again I was not explicitly
sober or especially sober whatever the [ __ ] we said earlier so I was maybe explicitly not sober yeah okay um so she shows up to this Penthouse um and clearly it's a really nice place and she's like lowkey casing the place like she knows what she needs she needs money what she is hoping for is like a long-term um sugar baby Arrangement um not just a date um but she also has a history of of um taking things that don't belong to her when they strike her fancy so she's like
looking around and she's like Okay so this dude like for real has money um and we're into that so but I'm also like obviously I I don't know what's about to happen but I'm like if you're into that that's not the time to steal things no it wouldn't be so she is she meets Titan he is massive um and so she in their conversation she realizes he just wants information from her he is not interested in any kind of like sugar daddy Dynamic with with her and she's like well [ __ ] like okay so what can I
get out of this um because she really does need the money so he has already paid a significant amount for the night um but she is like all right well if you want this information it's going to be like 20 grand or something like she throws out a number that she thinks is ridiculous and he's like done no problem and she's like should have asked for more like [ __ ] um but the information is for a party that the guy that she was on a date with previously was throwing I
thought that she was at his house no she has been at Titans she's at Titans now okay Titan saw her on the date then hired her for the night and then she saw that Titan had a lot of money yes and um yes so they left out the middle part where like he went online and found her on the site and like booked it they left that out of the story but that appears to be what happened so um he asks to be her daddy for a night like just for one night that's it and she's like cool cool
cool I'm going to need more money he's like done yes not a problem um so he immediately goes like full Dom turns to Stone no not yet he takes her to bed um he eats her out he fingers her he's lots of like squirt for your daddy kind of stuff it's a lot it's fully scent within like 20 minutes of meeting each other which I can respect the the game like the the the what's the word I want I don't know hubris I don't know like you know good for you for yeah yeah yeah I can respect that I
don't think I would I would respond well to that personally um but she's into it but I mean also and I'm sure like I know she's into it and she's being paid to be into it as well which I think helps your enthusiasm I yeah yeah yeah I would imagine so um but like I I don't know if someone said the words squirt for your daddy to me if I I wouldn't immediately laugh yeah I feel like that's one of those that would take me out of the moment pretty quickly what did that dude say to you that one time
may I lie with you and you were like I think the [ __ ] not yeah yeah so if a respectful request to lie with you gets declined I don't know how squirt for your daddy is going to lay well I also think it's different if this is a one-time hookup that you've never met before it hits totally different than if it's a partner that you have a relationship and trust with like well okay I am just going to delve back into the EXO exod daddy situation bring it cuz once again totally open to this is
not meant to be king shaming in any way but I think reading and just the dynamic of the scene they were in and her uh portraying an age progression with in that scene and then being like oh let me touch your little clitty and I need cumies okay yeah see that's why I like that's why I left it before but then I was like no I got to go back there because I'm like reading it I'm like oh this is not a scene or a scenario or a situation I have ever been in personally
nor do I think I will will ever find myself there personally but I'm like but I I can say with confidence that if uh my husband said may I touch your little clitty I it probably go about like that yeah I'm like there are just some things that I'm like nope suddenly dries the Sahara that had the opposite effect well okay so what I'm thinking of is like you know there was a time a while ago where like we got a new toy whatever and we went to go like use it and play with it
and my husband didn't understand all the buttons and so things happened that shouldn't have happened and we were both just dying laughing and he was like I really should have tested this for and like that hits different than if like a hookup is like trying something that doesn't work like I'm less likely to be amused by that was that the link to the toy that I sent you that one that when I text you and I was like I need a [ __ ] user manual on this text and then I and you're like
what's the toy so I sent it to you and then your response was I bought it because I was outlining this book and I was still drunk oh my God but I'm not going to lie that toy you really do have to read you do there are several buttons yeah and like some you have to hold and some you can just like hit once and you can do the wrong thing you can you can my husband calls that the goat yeah it's intense it's a lot the funniest part is I like sent the link to my cousin where I was like this is such an
like roughly the same text I sent you and she goes oh I just bought that for a friend's batch party and I'm like good for your friend if she hopefully she can read good for her or maybe everyone else is just walking around with knowledge about how to you like there are like three buttons we raised in too much Purity culture that we can't figure out how to use this toy I'm sorry I thought most toys came with an on off switch not three on and off switches that have different functions
functions and different patterns can be used on all three to do different things it's a lot yeah great toy highly recommend highly recommend but my poor husband he was like I really should have tried this out first uh we were using a toy one time that had like a separate remote that you could use sure uh but my husband uh inserted the toy and then goes okay what now no you had to hit the power button first so that's and he goes oh I'll know for next time that's so good but that's what I'm
saying like it hits different when it's your partner and like you can laugh together and like know each other like that's totally different yeah it's just like having that fun journey together like 20 minutes in someone being like squirt for Dad yeah let me touch that little clitty oh no thank you lil clitty sounds like a terrible rapper they're probably from Florida they're 100% from Central Florida I can tell you right now they're from Okala like sorry anybody from oala I'm so sorry oh [ __ ]
okay I was going to go more like Brandon or like Braden not brenon no all right we don't need to decide what where the pur where this rapper lives we'll decide off podt and let you guys know although feel free to send us your votes on where you think Lil clitty originated from there's no to me it's either Okala or they're from Jersey beach like there's no in the middle I was maybe also getting a Midwestern Vibe but like in the Malibu's Most Wanted kind of way all right anyway they
are like 20 minutes in and living their best life yes and she comes really really hard to the point where she actually starts to cry and she feels really like vulnerable because it was like so much of an experience um the next morning can I ask a quick question yeah yes does he have gray skin no so he appears human oh okay mhm so does she know he's a gargoyle she just believes he's a human so she doesn't know anything about the supernatural oh okay yeah so she doesn't
know they exist she's just living life look like a gargoyle he's just a big dude a big hot man yeah okay um so she is freaking out the next morning they don't even have sex he just like makes her come and then they go to sleep and so she decides she is going to get the [ __ ] out right now but she sees a ring on his finger um and it looks like it's an antique and it looks like it's probably pretty valuable so she decides she's going to take it off his finger oh of
all of the things you could steal in his bougie ass place yeah it's the ring off of his person and so she's like I can probably like Pawn this or sell it for like a pretty good good amount since this is not the long-term arrangement I was expecting like I need something to like pad my time and so when she takes it off his finger she goes to leave he turns into a massive stone gargoyle when she removes the ring for the record when I asked if he turned to stone earlier I
was really just making an erection joke yeah I didn't get that until just now when you said it he doesn't turn into stone yet and I was like really he didn't get hard well he might have gotten hard but he still didn't [ __ ] her so you know touche but now literal Stone yes now actual stone so um Supernaturals are real um they call themselves The Strange and he is currently trying to find the key and he is experiencing what they call the pole so the pull comes up
over and over again but it's this like because he was created for this purpose there's this like visceral feeling he gets in his chest when he is near the key or when he is not actively looking for the key and so he you know all of this is coming out as all of this is happening she's flipping out she's like did he drug me or something like what the [ __ ] so qu did she put the ring back on him no she's still has it in her hand so then we're just getting this but she
doesn't know any of this so they're like having a conversation now like he can still talk yes I'm confused so he's a gargoyle who moves I'm thinking not trom oh so he can still move it's not like he like turned to stone and is now like uh yes I'm thinking like the hunchback notom kind of gargoyles that come life okay yes that have wings and can fly yes the ones that can still I think when I heard Stone I just assumed he became sedentary like he like froze or something yes sorry that I could have
clarified that so I was like how I was like is it are they reading each other's minds like I'm like creating a is there telepathy yes no not that I'm aware of oh okay so then four other gargoyles show up um all all in Gargoyle form and um it's his like team essentially these are his brothers they're his family um and So eventually she agrees to help them because they need to get into the party this guy is throwing because they're pretty sure that he does have
the key um and he is some kind of movie producer or like he knows a movie producer or something and so the producer is having a rap show and they're like okay great thanks for the information we'll get it and she's like I'm sorry are you also a former Child Star do you know how to move in these circles do you know how to get in this party do you have an invitation no you don't so you're going to be paying me and I will be helping you thank you she is ever the opportune
oh she's she's in it to win it um so um throughout this whole thing she's very intentionally trying to like stay in character as her like sugar baby seductress like Persona um because she doesn't want to feel vulnerable again with him like she's really trying to keep it locked down um but then eventually Titan gets frustrated and he kicks everybody else out of the room um and he spanks her for stealing um and so she agrees to be his baby until until the morning after the party so the party
is only in two days so they're like one night two more days like um so they keep like pushing out this agreement um so he just continuously edges her until um she agrees to the whole thing um and then he tells her to get on her knees um my notes say smoking the stone pillar I think that means a [ __ ] I think that means it's your own notes pretty sure just knowing myself smoking the stone pillar is probably a [ __ ] and then he [ __ ] her with his tail more orgasm denial um because she's
still being punished for stealing um so then he finishes in her mouth and he's just really enjoying her um and having thoughts already about like he wishes that he had more than 48 hours with her mhm and I wanted to be like but you could like you're the one who made that rule like okay like the only one holding you back is you we're all out here looking for permission from someone yes you are an active participant in your own unhappiness it's also like you're a gargoyle and
this is going to be the the thing that like we can't get past exactly well it seems to be that it's like he's so focused on his duty and like fulfilling his mission and making sure that he's there for his brothers that like he has created a narrative where he can't be in a relationship with anybody like so it can only be temporary he should go to therapy he should but he won't um um so he leaves her in the bath he goes to meet with his brothers um there is a big
fight about jules's involvement um and they're saying like she's going to be a distraction to you like you this isn't a good idea we need you focused on the mission and he says no one will get in my way Jules is a means to an end she doesn't mean anything and um of course she overheard that she overheard the whole thing my notes again say Jules hears natch for naturally so I was like did you misspell snatch like I was like the [ __ ] you trying to write no naturally I told you it was going to be
a journey totes love the Abes so anyway she's really upset but she reminds herself like this is the arrangement I agreed to I shouldn't mean any to thing to him like this is all temporary um she gets a call from her mother who is harassing her about money and like talking down to her and saying like how are you even surviving right now if you would just sign over your trust if you would just drop this lawsuit like we would take care of you cuz her mom got together with her manager
and so the two of them are trying to like really [ __ ] her over not great so at this point I must have had an additional glass of wine because I start referring to Titan as te- money so he avoids her all day um but tells her to get dressed for dinner um he flies her up to the roof and she's like terrified but it's like a kind of cute moment where he's protecting her and they have a really romantic moment and he gets her to open up about the issues with her mom
um and how she was really exploited as like a child actor and um her mom essentially kind of abandoned her after all of this um orgasms ensue we love that yeah um yeah and then now I start referring to Jules as jar so the next day are they porn stars is that I don't know is this book just gargoyle porn it's just gargoyle porn yeah okay porn yeah I was I wasn't even going to say anything I was just going to move straight on and let you have it but I love that you went back to ronce
porn por I don't know why I don't know why I added additional syllables to it po anyway the next day jar offers to help t- money plan for the party and find the key she's like I can help you like we can figure this out together and he's like absolutely not that is not your place here your place is to get me into the party you are not a part of this and she's like cool cool cool this is a transactional Arrangement and I'm going to remove myself from this and I'm
guessing in his head it's because he's starting to catch feels and like wants her to be safe or no no he really is trying to keep her at a distance like he doesn't at this point have any feelings towards her outside of I've I've read too much smut that I'm like this is clearly what he means right we've this thousand times no he's like absolutely not you're not a part of this it's like that Tik Tok I sent you where like the girl was yeah so he like snuck into her
bedroom and stood over her with a knife and then like oh my gosh and then they fell in love and got married and she's like no he got arrested for stalking and she's like oh yeah yeah that's definitely what happens there I I don't read dark romance I didn't think that was the start to their love story no of course not so they get to the party and Titan is really struggling to function um because he can feel the the pole towards the key so he knows the key is there um and it's very distracting for
him cuz this is strictly supposed to be like um a fact finding Mission yes this is just reconnaissance they're not actually attempting to get the key great word um thank you anytime so then um Jules of course is Flawless through the whole thing um she is you know moving and shaking she's mingling whatever and she gets an invite to another party to actually see the relics that this guy has like another party on a separate date yes okay so um not just like a cool
VIP section of the party like a whole different day got it so this is not the guy she went on the sugar baby date with it's his friend that is hosting the party okay and so the friend recognizes her from her child star days and that's how they get the additional invite um and she's a little sked out cuz he's clearly super into her in a weird way um and so she is like but obviously if I go see your relics is there going to be a cage that you put me in sort of right am
I going to be a relic like am I going to join the collection so um uh so they are pretty sure that the key is in the safe upstairs which is currently off limits um so she distracts a guard Titan finds out where the vault is um but she gets cornered by a former sugar daddy um and she's in trouble like he is like calling her names and he's starting to put hands on her like like grabbing her throat and stuff and like at like he's like resuming a role of like an aggressive
Dum with her or like he's okay like so she never actually went home with him she only went on a couple of dates with him and he's pissed that she refused to go out with him again right okay right so Titan is not in the room he's upstairs looking for the vault but he all of a sudden like can feel Jewel's panic and he's like oh [ __ ] he's in tune with her emotions he starts to be um because breaks through like the pole Haze um and so he takes off and he's really panicked um because nothing
should distract him from the pole so he's not panicked about Joel's safety at this point he's panicked because like what the [ __ ] is happening like how did this happen um and So eventually he gets the sugar daddy away from her and then takes her to a cave what huh so he like at is the cave at the party no he like wraps her up and then I guess he goes into gargoyle form with his wings and like flies to a cave where he and his brothers used to hide before they had their rings to make them appear
human okay uh-huh this is in Los Angeles so I don't know you know those classic La caves sure the ones we all know about yeah the one everyone is aware of oh that one the big one yes yeah yeah it's on my list next time I'm in town yeah haven't had a chance to visit yet and the cave and in the big cave yeah um quite frankly it's probably the number one tourist attraction I know you're going to have to plan it well so you can actually see it you know you don't want to get there
midday inundated um so she is basically like baiting him like why did you bring me here what are we doing here um until he starts to choke her with his tail and then he eats her out and then a lot of like demands to like beg Daddy for your orgasm kind of situation yeah um of course I mean what other type of sex would you have in the big cave with a gargoyle with the gargy because he's now in Gargoyle form oh that's important because then my notes say she begs for that gargoyle pen
um and he finally gives in he had been trying to hold back cuz he was really afraid he was going to hurt her um but he finally gives in and um yeah [ __ ] someone with a stone penis it's something might hurt them it could um so she continues to tease him because she can tell that he is like holding back so the quote I wrote is you're so desperate to be daddy's little [ __ ] toy then grab your ankles so also how do you tease Stone verbally sorry okay all I needed to know thank
you for answering my question you're welcome so they finally [ __ ] it's incredible and then um oh I guess it had just been tail penetration before it's been all tails and fingers and tongue okay yeah yeah um so then one of Titan's Brothers shows up and he is really pissed that Jules is distracting Titan from the mission um and they discover because basically like the back story that we slowly piece together through all of this is that a group of gargoyles betrayed them and that's how
the key was lost and that's how the Relic room was lost um okay so and Titan and his brothers have been under the assumption they are the only gargoyles left that they killed all of the ones that had betrayed them but they find out that one of them is still alive Maximus and um he is um going also going after the key so they've been able to sense that there's another gargoyle around um and so um there there's lots of panic about like how did he survive where he's he been all this time and so
the brother takes juules home like back to his apartment so he just like hands a naked jewels to his brother and is like I'm going to go to work have a safe flight um how does how does Jules feel about that so I'm pretty sure that he had like [ __ ] her into unconsciousness at that point because she just wakes up alone um because this is dual point of view like that's all from Titan so I think that she had been just like passed out because then she wakes up all alone to a
message from her mom um who is asking to meet up she's like I really miss my daughter like can we please just sit down and have a conversation um so her mom says that um the manager has been taking things too far that like um she never wanted she never wanted this like she loves Jews um and now the manager is trying for a conservatorship and this is where I said #f free Brittney um also you were in Vegas when you outlined this weren't you yeah I was I was there were a lot of Britney
Billboards yeah yeah there were a lot of Britney Billboards and I love her I just need her to dance with fewer knives yeah like no knives would be ideal but at least fewer would make me feel better bargaining and safety planning exactly um so through this whole thing initially Jules is like kind of softening to her mom and thinking maybe like the manager has manipulated her but then she realizes that her mom is recording the conversation and she's trying to get jewels to admit to
engaging in sex work um so that they can use that as like evidence that she is not of sound mind to get the conservatorship um because people basically she went to this party industry party most people don't recognize her anymore but she was recognized and so then now there's all these rumors going around about her being at the party with this guy um and so now people are starting to talk and think that she's a sugar baby like she's kept it she goes by a different name and
like most people don't realize who she is she couldn't have just been at the party with someone she was seeing they all just assumed well I think that the additional sugar daddy showing up and making a scene like caused the issue so Jules eventually just decides to walk out she's like I'm I'm not doing this with you um but then Titan shows up and he's like can I please help you like listen one of my brothers already has all the information um he can delete any
recordings they have any evidence they have CU there's also like pictures of her with Titan where he had like thrown her over her should over his shoulder and like um pictures of her with various men apparently they had a pi following her for quite some time um and so he is like please just just let my brother do this for you like we can take care of this um but she has to remind herself um I think this is supposed to say temporary but it says democracy so this is all
temporary um and she is trying to stay focused on fixing the problem at hand okay right so Titan sends Jules on a shopping spree um and he decides that he is just going to go ahead fixed the problem because this is partially his fault she wouldn't have been at that party like she wouldn't have been found out in that way if she hadn't been helping him and so he takes his brother um to the mom's house to delete everything and steal any hard copies and everything um but then he starts to
realize that he has this weird pull like sensation towards Jewels um and towards protecting her and he finds all the pi pictures that go back even further than they realized um like years and years and it fills him with just an incredible amount of Rage so the manager comes home cuz he and Mom are together and so the manager comes home and Titan refuses to leave like the brother is like we got to get out of here he's going to see us whatever um he refuses to leave um and starts to
threaten him and says like you need to just drop this this is enough and the manager calls her a has been [ __ ] and says she's not worth the effort and Titan loses his [ __ ] and beats the ever loving [ __ ] out of this guy um is he still like actively her manager no J isn't she's not she's not doing just like her former manager yes yeah um so um after they essentially leave him very near death like he has really beaten him um he tells his brother that Jules can never know she had asked him
not to interfere and like he did anyway because he thought he was helping and so she can't ever find out about this um that feels healthy yeah yeah and he's like real bananas when he gets back to the penthouse he's like freaking out and she doesn't understand what's happening um but um yeah he finds her in the bath she has her earbuds in and so he [ __ ] her with his tail where she can't see him and she also can't hear him cuz she has her earbuds in um apparently the tail has some
sensation like his dick like it's very sensitive um and then the my last note for this chapter says ridged for her pleasure so I'm guessing that the tail is also rigged so that's something is it I thought it was ripped is it rided Ruffles are [Laughter] riged so for some context my aunt was moving and I was helping her move and she had has a large collection of wine and other kinds of alcohol that she couldn't get rid of and she didn't want to move with and so she just kept
pouring me Beverages and I just kept drinking them it's a safe space yeah I didn't know you felt that way about Ruffles but it's the same space woo the next morning oh my God so I was telling Vance this the last time I was here but I don't think you were here when I was sharing this I also had a very difficult time because my aunt wanted to watch the Stanley Cup finals while I was there and big hockey girly apparently um Vegas was supposed to be in the finals but they like fell
through at the last minute or whatever so it was Canada and a team from Florida and so um the lightning I don't know because she just kept pouring me wine and then I got so distracted because I've read a lot of hockey romance in my time yeah and they kept using words like penetration and one of cuz the like whatever and then one of the players was named Heyman and I I was fully I was taken out I was like I'm done I'm done I'm absolutely done and I don't remember if
I texted you or my sister but I texted somebody about how nobody was going to appreciate my commentary on the Stanley Cup finals and so I was trying to find a way to keep it to myself so was there commentary Beyond they say penetration a lot and his last name is Hyman oh my God I just remember that it I had been texting Matt about it like Chelsea it was not you or my sister it was my husband it was my husband because I remember being like listen I am watching the Stanley Cup finals and I
not watching for the sport I do remember that now and I'm not watching for the I'm watching for the pelvic thrusting during the warm-up stretches 100% I was not interested in the athleticism if I'm honest very impressive no one is taking that away from them no what I care about when I'm watching 100% so anyway the next morning um Jules gets a voicemail from her mom accusing her of attempted murder she's like I know that you sent those monsters here for him like I know that you did this and
so she is absolutely livid that Titan took this Choice from her after he promised that he wouldn't interfere um and so she leaves she's like my 48 hours are up so I will see you next week when we have to go to the second party um and that's it um but then she gets a message from her attorney saying that her mom has finally dropped the case and so her her trust is hers she no longer has to work as a sugar baby if she doesn't want to um and so um she like goes out on her balcony and just like
screams like [ __ ] you like she's just like relieved but also upset that Titan did this and it's a lot yeah it's a lot of mixed emotions in that moment right you're like he betrayed my trust exactly yeah uh you're like he also got me what I've been working for this whole time so like I'm mad at him but also grateful to him and I don't know which one is winning so um Titan had been watching her um yeah yeah he was worried that the manager or mom was going to come back
for payback or whatever I like that I just said yeah like of course like duh he was watching her well like now that he's had this weird I don't know like now that he feels drawn to protect her the way he previously felt drawn to try and find the key yes he's like well what else would I be doing other than watching her mhm yeah but then he hears her like screaming and he's like oh she is really really upset with me I'm going to have my brother watch her I also have work to do
so her his his brother watches her for the remainder of the week to make sure that she's safe um and they finally go to the party um and whenever she touches him he realizes he doesn't feel the pull anymore towards the key H and he's like well this is really odd um Jess feels the pull towards her yeah but then that leads him to say like after tonight we're never going to see each other again because you are a distraction like for him the pull is information about
about where the key is and if he's on the right track and like letting him know that he's doing what he's supposed to do and so the idea that she takes it away is not a good thing um not a welcome distraction exactly um so Jules then gets cornered by a weird creepo guy at the party um and she goes to the host of the party for help who is the guy who had recognized her previously and had invited them back and so um the one who also had a weird energy with her yeah
like a weird like fan girl energy with her kind of um but she went to him to the host for help instead of Titan and um he takes her the the host takes her upstairs towards the Vault so that she can get some space um and she is just really hurt by Titan's lack of regard for her feelings like she knows that he didn't owe her anything but like he violated her trust by going after her manager um and you know he's so dismissive of her at this point and so she whes up alone near the Vault um
and the Vault happens to be open because the host was like going to show off some of his relics to her and so he opened it and then he got called Away by a guard and she was like this is my chance and so she slipped in and she steals the key um and she just takes off um she's like no one gets the key I'm out but then the creeper that had cornered her follows her from the party and it turns out that he is Maximus the gargoyle who had betrayed all of them yeah and Titan didn't
recognize him because he was in human form um so they could feel like stren like energy of supernatural beings but they didn't know who it was right so um that is very inconvenient for them he is very much so so he's also after the key so he chases her um a fight ensues two more gargoyles show up and Jules is desperate not to let him get the key because she realizes like she [ __ ] up by taking it um if she had given it to Titan it would be safe but she was being
spiteful a little bit and so she didn't do that yeah like what was she going to do with the key just have it like but also she know she wasn't going to be able to keep that his whole purpose yes his existence is to find the key like what you mean this key that she puts between her boobs is the energy it describe it as like a a piece of of stone that's like the size of a cell phone that has like carvings in it so it's in her clutch um it's in her prison purse for
him to find later I hope not yikes he'd probably be into that he probably would um but as much as I am into the term little clitty I am into that situation for them your prison purse is your business Amen to that um so Titan realizes as Jules is already gone and Maximus is leaving he then puts it together he then like recognizes him and so he takes off and he tells his brothers like I'll get the key later because he doesn't realize that Jules has the key oh he leaves his opportunity to get into
the Vault um and he's like that's true love it really is he's like I'll find it another way like we just got to go so then there's a major fight scene there are like three gargoyles who survived oh from previously and so they're all beating the [ __ ] out of each other everywhere and um Titan realizes that Jules is kind of like it for him like she is the missing piece um and he's an idiot that none of it matters if she's not with him right okay and like then he puts it all together that like
cuz he had been kind of hurt that she went to someone else for help when she was feeling threatened and then um at the party and then he was like oh I only told her over and over again that this was temporary and she didn't mean anything to me so she was just doing what I told her to do whoops well isn't this the consequence of my own actions right he's like oh she just believed the words that came out of my mouth like oh [ __ ] so I know we've I've told this story before but my very
first date with my husband we closed down a bar and then I invited him back to my house to like keep drinking and partying and having fun and hanging out and I told him I was like hey you are welcome to come back to my house and I'd love to keep hanging out with you we aren't going to have sex and you're probably going to get blue balls just wanted to set those expectations if you're into that follow me if you're not no harm no Fabel we can like end the date here and
so he came back to my house with me and like we talked about he's like yeah of course I was going to follow you back and I absolutely did not believe that he's like I just thought that was what you said to feel better before you inevitably hooked up men are foolish yeah and he's like look at you actually meaning what you said and I was like boundaries [ __ ] I said well this gives me a lot of insight into your dating history my yeah he's like you said you weren't
going to have sex with me and then you didn't have sex with me yes you are correct I meant what I said Bud yeah um but did not mean anything he said um Titan's like that's just what you say right so like this whole time Jules had been trying to keep the key away from these other gargoyles and she was like I don't know if I can hide it it's in my purse I don't know what to do right and so um Maximus eventually gets jules's bag um and takes off and she's pretty
hurt at this point like physically her physically yeah like they they kind of beat the crap out of her and so Titan goes to her and she like grabs on to him and she's like do not follow him like please don't follow him and um he's like I wasn't going to follow him like I'm here for you um we'll get the key another day like this it's just not as important as you um and then his brother show up and Jules is like wiggling away from him and he's like what are you like
can you please just let me help you and she starts crawling under a car and like holds up the key and she's like I got it so somehow as like all the brothers had shown up and like the fight was going on she took the key out of her bag and hid it under a car as she was like running through this parking lot and so then she but then she kept the bag with her and was protecting it as if it had the key in it hoping it would like trick them it's like her child acting skills are really paying
off they really were can't underestimate those child actors she nailed it um so then um yeah they they win the day so then uh he takes off um to take her back home and clean her up and tend to her wounds and everything and this is where we finally get like Declarations of feelings like okay I actually really care about you I love you all that stuff um and he tells her that she has earned eared 20 spankings for stealing the key but because she's injured he's going to
have to save them for later um don't tell me with a good time right she's like oh okay um so then she is not injured enough for him to not [ __ ] her against the wall so they bang um I could have said that better that sentence got away from me no my thought was more of like okay so spanking is the boundary spanking is the boundary cuz I'm like I feel like having sex pressed up against a wall is also not like gentle sex usually no and his tail is in her ass sorry well played Hannah well played on
that one yeah I mean anyway is he spanking her with the like I'm confused why that was the actual limit like why spanking was out but the rest of it is was out yeah okay but the rest is fair game um but also she's down for whatever he's the one that's concerned about her being in pain um but apparently not that concerned um it is so funny just like the wide range of books like those books where you're like oh like a thumb in the in the ass feels so like salacious then another book where guy like
in her ass and he's like and I'm I want to [ __ ] suck this then [ __ ] this then come all over this and she's like do it [ __ ] do it and then these other books where they're like ooh that that's too far wow my no no hole I hated that I deeply apologized don't touch my no no hole focus on my little clitty you did that you did both of those things Chelsea is hiding for those who are listening and not watching zipped up my quarter zip over my face oh she's hiding oh my God that's so good
so um I do have a quote for you from this interaction in which she says I want you to fill all my holes Daddy when he's like messing with her and then he like I don't know shoves his fingers in her mouth there's a lot happening um so then they're in love and everybody's happy about it so a month later Jules that's it Jules is all healed up and she's moved in with Titan she finally gets those 20 spankings she is about to so um I was making a joke but I love that's actually what it took
a month yeah he really wanted to make sure she was okay I guess so the strange the Supernatural are all working together um to find Max and make sure the relics are protected because now that they have the key they can find The Relic room blah blah blah so this is apparently a series um everybody's fine at the end of this one so you know but they don't have the relics yet so I'm not going to lie I have no idea what the [ __ ] the relics do or really what the in it's never
explained they're just magic okay at some point I was like wow I wasn't paying attention at some point and missed when Hannah explained what this is ultimately leading to um but I I really feel better because there are sometimes when I'm like trying to like process all of the all you know like when I like Miss that his [ __ ] name was Titan which is the name of the book like that feels like an obvious one to miss I thought you were going to bring up how you missed that one of the Weasley twins
[Laughter]
died yeah yeah I did I was reading so quickly I like I think I in retrospect like I needed to know what happened during that fight in but I was also anxious right right right and so I feel like I was like speed reading but in a way that like when you're that young you weren't processing yes and so it wasn't until my sister spoiler alert I was like the [ __ ] you mean one of the weasly twins died except I didn't say the [ __ ] you mean because I grew up in a very conservative Christian
house old you said what he said huh yeah yeah wait okay so it's now a month later she's about to get the 20 spankings yeah so she's all healed up she's moved in with Titan yeah um everybody's working on finding the relics in the room Jules winds up getting 25 spankings um because she interrupted a meeting and intentionally made tight and hard and then walked out of the meeting and so she got an extra five spankings for making him hard in front of everyone have a hard time
believing she's only ACR TW an extra five yeah I feel like she has enough like brat energy that she should have accured more over the month um but I am not the Arbiter of that decision um so then more you are the Arbiter of your own destiny hell yeah um so there are lots of Declarations of love and feelings um my notes say sexy times abound and that is the end huh yeah huh there's like enough plot that I have questions that I would like answers to yes but not
enough for me to feel the story was well rounded yes you know what I'm saying mhm I do so what's our uh judging scale keys I guess stone statues gargo gargo we could do gargoyles I feel like gargoyles feels like what it should be yeah we can do gargoyles um so for the record I'm imagining The Hunchback of Notre um mhm and animated cartoon gargoyle yes you know mhm that's that's the ones using for the rating no yeah and I feel like that's worth noting when we're talking about this rate like it's
not like there's like 5,000 of them right it's like oh okay how many is this going to be out of feels like single digits um yeah I was going to say I think five because they are five brothers oh that's cute yeah um so I think uh two because okay so there's a specific reason it might have been a little bit more maybe but the issue that I have that really continues to bug me to this very day is that Jules is human and Titan is Immortal and they never address like is
she going to have some kind of expanded lifespan is this just like until she gets old and he's over it like that's never added author is setting themselves up to write a whole followup series which is where all of the original Partners have died oh damn and now it's so dark it sounded darker than I meant it now the jwes is dead yeah and but like now they they they're in the new series they're going to discover some sort of advanced magic that they didn't know about before that will allow the
immortality so part of the plot will be overcoming that trauma of losing the person that they thought was their partner yeah I mean I hope that's true um if not Jillian if you're listening this is for you it's a free idea pick it up run with it or just keep all of the current partners and let us know how it's going to happen that feels a bit easier you don't have to kill everyone and write a new series we'd love to just know maybe it's that they finally get into The Relic room and like there's
something in there that saves them you'll just have to read the rest of the series I won't probably I mean I might so the rest weren't out yet um I didn't realize that this was meant to be like an actual series and so the rest weren't out um but yeah I feel like two two and a half cuz there were like some plot holes you know yes um so while like the sex scenes were interesting and like the premise was fun it was like it didn't give me enough to fill in all those questions yeah you're
there are only so many holes you can fill while not filling the plot holes and on that note thank you so much for joining us today rate and review the show like subscribe tell friends we're honored that you would choose to spend your time hanging with us yeah we appreciate you guys and um we'll see you next time yeah bye SMUD bye well that's it for this week's muts [ __ ] we hope it was good for you cuz it sure was great for us if you're digging what we're doing it would mean a lot if you'd take
a minute to rate and review the show wherever you're listening right now maybe tell that sexy someone to lend us an ear we love you we appreciate you and we'll see you next week stay SMY [Music]