In this powerful episode of Smart Sex, Smart Love , Dr. Joe Kort sits down with world-renowned trauma expert, psychiatrist, and author Dr. Frank Anderson. Together, they explore the many forms of trauma—relational, cultural, global, and more—and how our responses, not just our experiences, shape our healing journeys. Dr. Anderson opens up about his personal transformation, the writing of his memoir To Be Loved , and the deep belief that love and connection can heal trauma. You’ll hear insights o...
Jun 20, 2025•32 min•Season 4Ep. 17
You can build the body you want and live a healthy lifestyle with a few simple changes, says Amadeo Aram, a sports and exercise professional, certified personal trainer, and online fitness coach who works with gay men all over the world to help them build the body they always have dreamed of. It’s not complicated to achieve your goals, he emphasizes. Born and raised in Berlin, Germany, Aram conducts trainings online with his “tribe” of gay men – his community of like-minded individuals who face ...
May 26, 2025•36 min•Season 4Ep. 16
In this insightful episode of Smart Sex, Smart Love, host Dr. Joe Kort welcomes Dr. Ronald Hellman, a distinguished psychiatrist and pioneer in LGBTQ+ mental health advocacy. Together, they delve into the concepts of "homosexism" and "sides," challenging longstanding cultural assumptions about gay male sexuality. Dr. Kort and Dr. Hellman discuss the evolution of the term "side"—coined by Dr. Kort to describe gay men who prefer sexual activities other than anal intercourse—and how it has gained a...
Apr 29, 2025•33 min•Season 4Ep. 15
In this episode of Smart Sex, Smart Love, Dr. Joe Kort interviews Dr. Lauren Fogel Mersy, and Dr. Jennifer Vencill dive into the complexities of sexual desire discrepancies between partners. They discuss the differences between libido, sexual desire, and sex drive, emphasizing that sexual desire discrepancies are common and should be normalized rather than pathologized. The episode highlights two types of libido: spontaneous and responsive, and how cultural narratives often misrepresent sexual e...
Mar 21, 2025•30 min•Season 4Ep. 14
In this episode of Smart Sex, Smart Love's fifth season , Dr. Joe Kort talks with Jay Kaplan, an attorney for the ACLU of Michigan’s LGBTQ+ Project. Jay shares insights on the Trump 2.0 administration’s executive orders affecting LGBTQ+ rights, particularly policies targeting transgender individuals. They discuss the removal of LGBTQ+ references from federal websites, restrictions on gender-affirming care, and the reinstatement of the transgender military ban. Jay explains the legal challenges b...
Feb 21, 2025•33 min•Season 4Ep. 13
“For a while, we thought we were a fluke in the system,” announces Samantha Wynn Greenstone, a social media influencer and actor who “came out” less than two years ago about her unconventional marriage to a gay man. Through social media communications with Smart Sex, Smart Love host, Joe Kort, Greenstone and her husband, Jacob Hoff, finally were able to “label” their relationship as “mixed orientation.” The couple fell in love, were married last November, and have been talking about their monoga...
Jan 27, 2025•41 min•Season 4Ep. 12
“I remember my dad telling me when I was 12 or 13 that I was too old to play with toys,” reports internationally known Barbie collector Jim Taylor. He opened Season 4 of Smart Sex, Smart Love by talking about why he began collecting Barbies, and now is the proud owner of more than 3,000 dolls. “I played with traditional boy toys growing up,” he points out. “I loved transformers.” As he got older, his desire to play with toys never diminished. Finally, when Taylor was well into his 20s, he decide...
Dec 18, 2024•31 min•Season 4Ep. 11
“I wanted to call my book, Go F**** Yourself, but I didn’t think the publishing world would accept it or get it,” laughs Eric Sprankle, PhD, author of DIY: The Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation. The professor of clinical psychology and co-director of the sexuality studies program at Minnesota State University in Mankato was a guest on my Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. He talked about his DIY book, which debunks dozens of century old myths about masturbation that many still be...
Sep 02, 2024•28 min•Season 4Ep. 10
“If suffering is at the very core of the trans experience, what do we have to look forward to?” questions Rae McDaniel, a non-binary, therapist, coach, and transgender diversity and inclusion educator. “I think the world is better when we all get to be our authentic self, free from shame and guilt.” McDaniel is the author of a book, “Gender Magic: Live Shamelessly, Reclaim your Joy and Step into your Most Authentic Self,”a first-of-its-kind practical guide to achieving gender freedom with joy, c...
Aug 02, 2024•30 min•Season 4Ep. 9
Christine DeLozier, a food expert, research scientist and licensed acupuncturist, combined all of her talents to produce a book entitled, “Diet for Great Sex: Food for Male and Female Sexual Health.” You can have great sex if you eat certain foods and reduce consumption of other foods, her research shows. During my Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, DeLozier talks about how great sex is much more than being with the right person and being in the right mood. Throw in the right foods and watch your se...
May 18, 2024•22 min•Season 4Ep. 8
“When I was in my first year of medical school, I finally came out to my homophobic dad and it did not go well,” announces Ron Holt, DO, a board certified psychiatrist, author and advocate for LGBTQ+ rights. “I never want anyone to go through my traumatic experience,” and that is why Dr. Holt is such a relentless champion for the LGBTQ+ community. He has presented talks nationally for more than 15 years on the consequences of bullying, suicide risk reduction, access to quality health care for th...
Apr 11, 2024•29 min•Season 4Ep. 7
Professor Eric Schrimshaw has conducted extensive research on a variety of topics related to the LGBTQ+ population, including HIV prevention and treatment, the use of pornography by gay and bisexual men, men involved in sex work online, and most recently, on behaviorally bisexual men, a topic we discussed in this Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. In this particular study, the research team focused on men who identify themselves socially as heterosexual, but they reported in the study that they are ...
Mar 03, 2024•29 min•Season 4Ep. 6
Alex de la Cruz started his career in advertising and moved into product design, specializing in drinkware and dinnerware for some of the largest retailers in the country. After 15 years, he felt stagnate and needed a change. His creativity, innovation and own traumatic personal journey led to the beginnings of Bator Balm, a men’s edging lubricant that enhances the bating experience and has strengthened a sense of community among bators. In this Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Alex tells his stor...
Dec 27, 2023•30 min•Season 4Ep. 5
Sex, romance, death and divorce are just four of the subjects the Old Gay Guys explore during this Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. Bill Lyons, 79; Jessay Martin, 70; Robert Reeves, 80; and Mick Peterson, 67; like to call themselves the “Old Gay Guys,” but that doesn’t even come close to describing who they are and the impact they have made on literally millions of lives! The four friends modeled for Men’s Health, and “we dropped our pants” when we were asked,” they all laugh about their first “ex...
Dec 09, 2023•32 min•Season 4Ep. 4
Since the pandemic, sexual empowerment has increased 30 percent and sexual self-esteem now is 50 percent higher. Why the change, and is this good? Searah Deysach, a sex educator and owner of Early to Bed and Trans Essentials, answered those questions and many more in my recent Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. “COVID changed our lives quickly and abruptly,” she begins. “Suddenly we were forced to spend time alone, or alone with our partner. “We were talking about our relationship more and what we w...
Oct 24, 2023•29 min•Season 4Ep. 3
Conventional wisdom tells us it takes two people with an equal commitment to save a marriage. Winifred Reilly does not share that way of thinking, and she can prove it. Living in a 10-year static marriage, she applied her therapeutic skills to her own relationship journey. More than 35 years later, her marriage is stronger than ever, she continues to use these techniques very successfully in her therapy practice, and she has written a book, “It Takes One to Tango,” which demonstrates how to resc...
Sep 12, 2023•33 min•Season 4Ep. 2
In my first Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast for Season 4, I opened it quite explosively with featured guest, Boyslut Zachary Zane , as he likes to be called. At the young age of 32, Zachary is quite accomplished. He is a Brooklyn-based columnist, sex expert, author and activist whose work focuses on sexuality, culture and the LGBTQIA community. Recently, he wrote a book, Boyslut: A Memoir and Manifesto , and we talked about it – very openly, candidly and explicitly. Bisexuality has had very little...
Jul 19, 2023•34 min•Season 4Ep. 1
Can a heterosexual woman unexpectedly fall in love with another woman? Can a gay man eroticize about a heterosexual woman? It is in our human capacity to respond to our sexuality even though society is not quite accepting of sexual fluidity. What exactly is sexual fluidity? According to Lisa Diamond, professor of Psychology and Gender Studies at the University of Utah, sexual fluidity is the capacity for flexible erotic responses. For the past 25 years, Dr. Diamond has studied the development an...
Apr 06, 2022•26 min•Season 3Ep. 14
Nic Reveles, somatic sex educator and sexological bodyworker, has dedicated the past several years of his life to helping gay, bisexual and queer-identified men recover from the trauma imposed on their bodies by culture, church and family in a centuries’ old attempt to control sexuality and sexual expression. “Coach Nic” developed Body Prayer to reclaim the Sacred for our Erotic Bodies. In his new profession – he was a reknown musician for more than two decades and then shifted careers to the Ca...
Mar 23, 2022•26 min•Season 3Ep. 13
Pornography is not an addiction; it is a way to escape from other issues in your life. In a recent Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Joshua Grubbs, PhD, a clinical psychologist and associate professor in the clinical psychology PhD program at Bowling Green State University, talks about addictions and how to gain a better understanding of them. He notes that research is exploding when it comes to understanding sex addiction … and whether it truly is an addiction. “The more we know about it, the more...
Mar 08, 2022•22 min•Season 3Ep. 12
“Someone asked me to choke him for a fee, and that is how it all started,” reports Master Arch, a fetish worker, ProDom, fetish creator, death escort and financial fetishist. Master Arch has been on the scene a long time and has a great deal to share about the Findom fetish. Financial domination (also known as Findom) is now more widely accepted; it no longer is a passing fad, Master Arch points out during a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast. It goes beyond fetish in the world of BDSM, and it is eth...
Feb 22, 2022•26 min•Season 3Ep. 11
Narcissists engage in behaviors that will keep the world around them more comfortable, and they will trap you into believing their way of thinking is the only way of thinking. You do not have to be a victim in their life of manipulation. You won’t change a narcissist, but you can change how you handle yourself and cope more effectively with these situations. In a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Matt Phifer, a therapist and expert in toxic relationships, narcissism, trauma and emotional abuse, tal...
Feb 09, 2022•26 min•Season 3Ep. 10
Women never gave up their claim; it was stripped from them, finds Kate Balestrieri, PhD, licensed psychologist and certified sex addiction therapist. Women can build resilience and lead the life they want – sexually and holistically. During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Dr. Balestrieri talks about the challenges women face when it comes to sexuality, identity and vulnerability, and how they can reclaim their sexuality on their own terms. Women often are treated in unwanted ways and society to...
Jan 25, 2022•26 min•Season 3Ep. 9
Heather McPherson is living her dream career. A multi-passionate entrepreneur, she has incorporated all of her loves into her business and is having the time of her life! A licensed marriage and family therapist supervisor, a licensed professional counselor supervisor, an AASECT and SHA certified sex therapist, the CEO and Founder of SHA (Sexual Health Alliance), the CEO of Respark Therapy and Associates, and a podcast host of Practice Outside the Lines, Heather is doing it all! In a Smart Sex, ...
Jan 10, 2022•28 min•Season 3Ep. 8
Marriage and couples therapist Lynda Spann, PhD, knows firsthand the struggles two women may face in an intimate and romantic relationship. She also knows how to love in a way that frees her to be her true self, and, today, she works with all couples – different sex and same sex – to improve their relationship. During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Dr. Spann talks about how different sex couples can learn from same sex couples how to have a healthy, loving relationship. Women traditionally are...
Dec 27, 2021•25 min•Season 3Ep. 7
Your child comes home from school angry and upset. He throws a temper tantrum for seemingly no reason at all. You respond with the same anger and send him to his room in frustration. His bad behavior is not tolerable, so you punish him for his outburst. You and your daughter spend a fun day at the beach. When it is time to go home, she protests and starts screaming at you. She is not ready to leave and is not going to leave. The louder she yells, the angrier you get. By the time you are able to ...
Dec 13, 2021•30 min•Season 3Ep. 6
Couples often are so focused on lasting long enough in bed that they end up experiencing performance anxiety and the shame and worry that accompanies those feelings. The result: a bad bedroom outcome. But this can change! During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Dr. Joe Kort talked with Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent, who offers some advice for lasting longer in the bedroom and having better intimacy. Anxiety is the number one reason therapists see individuals dealing with sexual dysfunction, an...
Nov 30, 2021•29 min•Season 3Ep. 5
Crossdressing is not a gender; it’s an action! Savannah Hauk, author, speaker and podcaster on the subject of demystifying the crossdressing experience, shares her thoughts and experiences as a crossdresser on a Smart Sex Smart Love episode. Savannah is a male-to-female dual gender individual supporting and promoting non-binary visibility. Her focus is letting every crossdressing person find their own confidence, expression, identity and voice. She frequently is asked why she chooses to crossdre...
Nov 15, 2021•27 min•Season 3Ep. 4
Vulnerability in men can lead to isolation, depression and suicide. In fact, the suicide rate in men is four times more than women, and suicide is the seventh leading cause of death in men. Why are men afraid to share their vulnerability? And what can they do about it so they will feel empowered to lead a life of connection, openness and honesty? As young boys, males are taught not to shed tears because it is a sign of weakness. It is unmanly and unattractive, they’ve been told. It’s time to bre...
Nov 01, 2021•24 min•Season 3Ep. 3
Sensate focus isn’t a new technique, however, do you know how to use it effectively to truly reconnect to your body and your sensual self? During a Smart Sex, Smart Love podcast, Linda Weiner, certified diplomate in sex therapy and author of a book entitled, “Sensate focus in sex therapy: The illustrated manual,” explains this mindful touching technique that can enhance your sex life. “You can turn off the chatter” in your mind and tune into your body to improve your sex life, she finds. The tec...
Oct 18, 2021•25 min•Season 3Ep. 2
