>> Announcer: On the next episode of Sips, suds, and smokes. >> Julianna: It is summer, and as the temperature outside goes up, good old boy Dave's cognitive abilities plummet. Why don't you tell us what pallet stripping nightmare you're unleashing on us today? >> Dave: As we all know, celebrities are better than us normal people in all ways. I mean, I think we can agree on that, right? That's why whenever they endorse a product, we should all
immediately go out and buy it. That's what I do. >> Julianna: Oh, immediately. >> Dave: Honestly, though, some celebrity endorsed, uh, products are pretty good. But I think that's more the exception than the rule. Today we'll be, uh, tasting some canned cocktails from celebrities who took different paths to fame and fortune. >> Announcer: Well be right back after this break. Brought to you almost live from the dude in the
basement studios. Why? Because thats where the good stuff, uh, is, suds and smokes, with your smokin host, the good old boys. >> : Suds. >> Announcer: Suds. Uh, suds. It's time for more suds. >> Julianna: Welcome, everyone, to another sud segment where we say bad beer is like reality television. Someone must be enjoying it because it just won't go away. >> : Huh? >> Julianna: No. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> : I mean, welcome to Compton and the dead. Quiet.
Wow. >> Julianna: I'm one of your hosts, good ogael. Juliana. And joining me today at the table is El Jefe. Go to my mic. >> : Yep, I'm here. Uh, I am not going to be good at most of the impersonations I'm going to attempt today. I'm just warning you. >> Dave: So it's a normal show. >> : So it's a normal show. That is correct. Yes. >> Julianna: Nice. >> : I set the bar low and often. >> Julianna: Think it might go lower today, but.
>> Speaker E: I feel like the great opportunity we have here is we can get banned to entire groups now, not just geographic areas. >> : Well, it's all going to be west coast, you know, today, so. Yeah. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> Julianna: Oh, we might be giving something away. Good old boy sparky. So nice to see you again. >> Speaker E: It's true. I'm sorry. Smell so bad. >> Julianna: No, no. >> Speaker E: That's one of the great things about radio.
>> Julianna: No, I think smell radio. I think that's what's on the table. >> Speaker E: Oh, okay. That's good. >> Dave: Gonna drown out the product. Yeah. >> : Yeah. >> Julianna: Good old boy Dave. Hello. >> Dave: This is all west coast. So does that mean these are all gonna be dank and piney resinous? >> : Thanks for playing resinous. >> Julianna: Ooh. Well, folks, it's
summer. It is summer. And as the temperature outside goes up, good old boy Dave's cognitive abilities plummet. >> : Hey, let's do that thing where you. >> Julianna: Drive a car at me and I jump over it. >> : Dave, are you saying there's a seasonality to your impaired cognitive ability? Because I thought it was like a year round kind of thing. >> Dave: Sometimes I say hold my beer more often than others. >> Speaker E: Ok, so it was warmer months.
>> Julianna: Yeah. Ok, well, that's right. It's time for another installment of our summer, a questionable decision series. >> Speaker E: Uh, you told me that this was, ah, a highfalutin discussion, uh, book club. >> Julianna: And that was your first problem. >> : The talented and stunning palettes, you know, have. We've brought them down to the bottom. >> Speaker E: Here we go. >> : There can't be a top without a bottom. So, you know, here we are.
>> Speaker E: Is this like a, uh, power bottom situation? >> : I don't think this is that kind of show. >> Julianna: Okay, it depends on how many of these you have. >> : Swift exit out of this conversation. That's all I know. >> Dave: You're gonna need something a little. Something a little stiffer than these. These drinks here. >> Julianna: Wow. >> : Please don't change the channel yet.
>> Julianna: All right, good old boy. Dave, why don't you tell us what pallet stripping nightmare you're unleashing on us today? >> Dave: That was aggressive. Um, so, but sadly, and I mean this for all of us, it is probably warranted this time. Uh, as we all know, celebrities are better than us normal people in all ways. I mean, I think we can agree on that, right? That's why whenever they endorse a product, we should all immediately go out and buy it. That's what I do.
>> Julianna: Oh, immediately. >> Dave: Uh, honestly though, some celebrity, uh, endorsed products are pretty good. But I think that's more the exception than the rule. Today we'll be, uh, tasting some canned cocktails from celebrities who took different paths to fame and fortune. >> : Hmm. >> Dave: M one group, you know, worked from nothing, came from nothing, man. And they used talent and just hard work to get there. And the others, they started, you know, rapping.
>> : I like the shizzle with the dizzle. >> Julianna: Oh, uh, boy. Okay, folks, so from Doctor Dre and Snoop, we have the gin and juice, premium gin based cocktails in four unique fruit flavors. In the other corner, we have the west coast hip hop. Oh, wait, going up against the west coast hip hop icons. Haha. >> Dave: You can tell we pray for this. >> Julianna: Yeah, we have Sprinter vodka soda that also comes in four unique fruity flavors. Sprinter is from Kylie Jenner.
>> : Yeah. >> Julianna: Who rose to fame on keeping up with the Kardashians reality series, folks. >> Dave: Wait, what is that? What is that? >> Speaker E: I never realized until just now that a certain voice frequency could kill sperm. >> Dave: If only. >> Julianna: Yeah, sadly, it's on me. >> : Oh, there's a lot of damage, you know, in that family. >> Julianna: Wow. Okay, well, there we are. So
good, old boy. Mike, why don't you give us the suds ratings for today? >> : We'll be discussing and rating these products. And I'm using air quotes with the suds ratings plus our signature belching sounds. Here are those ratings. Now, I will be attempting switching between Kardashian and Snoop here. That sucks. Give me anything but a low quality, celebrity induced product marketing. What am I saying? Like, to 20 year olds. So number two is gotta be, uh, Kim,
was that a belch? I mean, or did my body just reject that drink? Uh, number three is, uh. Gotta get some snoop in there. Yo, yo, what's the drizzle? What's a drizzle? Oh, man, what a relief. The burning and itching finally stopped. >> Dave: Wow. >> : I finally achieved a slow clap. I can't. Can I say that my. My day is full now? Thank you. >> Speaker E: Did it. >> : Yes. Number, uh, four, uh, let's go with the matriarch. Girls.
A body should really not make that sound while making a sex tape that got accidentally leaked and somehow launched a multi billion dollar family empire that I. >> Speaker E: It happens sometimes. >> : Get your butt in the air a little higher. >> Dave: Oh, that's a good mother daughter. >> : Uh, yo, man. Doctor Dre, listen to that. Hang time. Number five, give me another hit off that blunt, man.
Thank you, thank you. I am over educated and overpaid, so I don't know that I can achieve, you know, the result. Looking for. >> Dave: Okay, maybe we should just get started. >> Julianna: I think that is a, uh. Yeah. >> : Okay, can we declare it over? >> Speaker E: Yeah, that's it, guys. >> : And close. I'm gonna go ahead and do once again. Yeah. >> Julianna: Uh, okay, round one. Let's just get started.
Okay, coming in. Our, uh, first pour is from sprinter, and it is their lime vodka soda. Four and a half percent abv. >> Speaker E: The fact it's called sprinter, isn't that the name of a delivery van? >> Dave: I mean, it's called sprinter because it'll give you the runs. >> Speaker E: Wow, you're going to be sprintering to the portage on. >> : So we're, uh, we are tasting all of these on the
fly. We have not had these beverages in advance to come up with, uh, progressive, uh, and, uh, loquacious. >> Dave: If we asked people to try them in advance, so, uh, no one would have shown up. >> Julianna: I mean, the smell. The aroma isn't bad. It's like, kind of like sprite, right? >> Dave: This is a lime soda. >> : To me, I mean, I pick up, you know, definitely. Definitely some citrus, you know, in the aroma itself, but that's
cleaning products line. Yeah. There you go. >> Julianna: Yeah, I know. It is a little west coasty, isn't it? >> Dave: I don't like the way it dries my mouth out. >> : This was supposed to have what in it? Gin? >> Dave: No, this is vodka. All right. >> : So this is, um, all gonna be. >> Dave: Flavored up for four and a half percent. How much I'm getting. >> Speaker E: I'm getting salty. >> : This is a malt beverage.
>> Speaker E: It's a little salty to me. >> Julianna: At the end. >> : Yeah. >> Speaker E: At the end, it's so it's kind of like, I get this roses lime juice, like the. This corn syrup, and it's been on the shelf in the grocery store for a couple of years, and a little bit salty. >> : I would say, if you had handed me a perrier with a lime wedge in it. Not terribly different than this. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> : M no.
>> Julianna: Like, are you feeling any. No. I mean, and at four and a half percent, would you even expect to feel. >> : I would say, other than the hint of lime off this, there's really nothing there. >> Dave: This is something I would put in a drink. Like, to make a drink. >> Speaker E: Like a roofie. >> Dave: Yeah. Actually, Sparky, are you starting to feel drowsy?
>> Speaker E: I mean, I don't like where you're putting your hands right now, but I might not in a little while. >> : I think that is a common phrase in the. In the Kardashian household. Uh, I don't like where your hands are going right now, but keep doing that. >> Speaker E: Yes. >> : You know, wow, look, I just looked at a clip where, you know, Kylie is getting, you know, herself shaved by Scott in a. In a bathtub, uh, because she didn't want to
go, you know, have somebody else, you know, trim her up. Uh, all I have to say is, you know, you don't want to watch that video. >> Speaker E: Okay. >> : All right. >> Julianna: Okay. >> Dave: Yeah. >> Speaker E: So, yeah, I mean, it's innocuous. Pine saw and a little bit salty. >> : I would say this would go to somebody that says, you know what? I don't know what I really want. Just give me anything that doesn't have any flavor. Boom. There you go.
>> Julianna: And giving you this. >> : Yes. Yeah, exactly. >> Dave: That's funny, because I thought Mike said. >> : Um, I like this. You know, I'm gonna put, like, a royalty. You know, that it's a real. It's actually just a fine. Directly to Dave. Every time he replays that, actually, he's. >> Speaker E: He's gonna give it to your wife. >> : And, uh, you know, that's $100 fine. Every time David's that. I like this. >> Speaker E: I'm so angry.
>> : Yeah, there you go. Much better. >> Julianna: So, yeah, I'm sorry. >> : I'm not pointing. That is a one. >> Julianna: Okay. >> Speaker E: I mean, it's better than truly. >> Dave: Honestly, though, I will say it's not bad, not terrible. >> : Yeah. Because there's nothing there. >> Dave: I think this because you're gonna say, because, uh, if you start with the other one, I agree. >> Julianna: Okay. >> Dave: There's no way to go bad.
>> : It's just not good. Yeah. Correct. >> Julianna: So we're gonna. Okay, we're gonna go with a two. >> : Yeah. >> Julianna: And our qualification on this is that flavor wise, it's not bad. >> : It's not offensive. >> Julianna: You're not. Yeah, it's not offensive, but you're not gonna get a, um, buzzer. >> Speaker E: You're gonna have to know, you know, that's that's it. I don't know how many calories are.
>> Dave: In this, but, like, there's 100 calories per can. I think I want to get. >> Speaker E: I want to get ripped. If I'm doing a vodka canned vodka drink, I want to make sure that it takes me where I want to go. >> : Yeah. What, uh, is that, like, a half a teaspoon of vodka to achieve? >> Dave: Yeah. But, like, 105 pound anorexic, you know? >> Speaker E: Oh, that's true. I have been fasting for the last three days.
>> Julianna: All right, we'll be back after a brief interlude. Welcome back, everyone. How's it going? Um, today we are doing a summer of questionable decisions, and we are going Compton versus calabasas. We are taking some gin and juice from snoop and doctor dream, and it's going toe to toe with sprinter from the Kardashians. M. Yep. So gin versus vodka. Ah. >> Dave: Based, actually, it's fruity, I think a ginner spirit. >> : So bad.
>> Julianna: Wow. Okay, so before the break, we started with a sprinter lime. Now we are gonna go to the gin and juice. Citrus. >> Speaker E: Citrus. Not as much on the news as. >> : Yeah, the first one. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> : This one is almost completely absent of any aroma. >> Julianna: Now, this one is 5.9% abv versus the four and a half. >> Speaker E: Thanks. >> : Huge difference. >> Speaker E: Thanks, Snoop. Yeah, appreciate that.
>> : So the first thing that I like in a gin drink is gin. Yeah. This is just completely devoid of, you know, any presentation of anything remotely close to any gin, be it, uh, you know, juniper forward or herbal forward, or, you know, and even if it was old Tom or anything, it's just. Yeah, if you. I would have never guessed this is even remotely close to being a gin in anything.
>> Speaker E: And even if it was like, like, say, a citrus forward gin, it's lost in whatever the citrus flavoring. >> : The sugar is, just obliterating anything that, you know, would have been there to begin with. >> Speaker E: What's the calories on these? Just this one. >> Julianna: M. Let's see, 300. >> : No, you could have told me this is a hard seltzer with, uh, a little bit of citrus on it, and I would have gone, huh, okay.
>> Julianna: I don't see calories listed on the can. >> Speaker E: No, that's, that's cool. >> Dave: They're too gangster to talk about. >> Speaker E: There is a much more pronounced bitterness in this. It almost like it's not in there, but, like, my brain wants to put quinine in there. Like, where is it? >> : Right. >> Speaker E: But there is. There's definitely more of a bitterness, um, to this. That was not in the other one.
>> Julianna: Yeah. This one, it says it's got ginwit, real juice, citrus, rose, and natural flavors. >> Speaker E: Rose. >> Julianna: Rose. I'm, um. >> : Yeah, that's sort of rose water is a thing, but it's more about inducing aroma than it is any flavor component. >> Speaker E: I'm, um, not getting aroma. >> : Yeah. I'm not getting any aroma. >> Dave: Getting much of anything. >> : Yeah. >> Julianna: Yeah. Interesting.
>> : Again, I would hand this to somebody that simply says, you know what? I don't know what I want. I just. Yeah, uh, just get me something. >> Dave: Just take this over in the corner. >> : And, you know, for somebody that doesn't know what they like, I would totally hand this to him. And I'm going, huh uh, there's nothing there, so you can't pick. I can't piss you off. >> Speaker E: It's kind of like a disappointing gin and tonic minus the tonic.
>> : Yeah. If somebody to me and said, oh, here's your gin and tonks, or I'd. >> Dave: Go, might have to hand us back. >> : To, you want to put some gin in? >> Julianna: Yeah. >> Dave: I mean, to Sparky's point, there might be some tonic in there. There's just no gin. >> : It's, uh, definitely not bitter enough. >> Speaker E: Yeah, there's, there's a little bit of. >> : Bitter completely, you know, gone.
>> Speaker E: Yeah, there's no, I think that's the. >> Dave: Part that's bothering me more, is the lack of botanicals. Well, yeah, exactly. >> Julianna: It's very flat to me, at least with the, I mean, and, you know, here's the thing, is, is our expectations high? Because all of us at this table enjoy gin and a good gin a lot. Right. And you're expecting to get some kind of botanicalness in there.
>> : I think that is following the celebrity endorsement, which, it is hollow and uh, shallow. And, uh, really, there's nothing there. So, uh, it's aligning well with landing. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> : Syrupy garbage. >> Julianna: Okay, so. >> : I'm gonna use the same criteria as we did. >> Dave: I think so. I don't want to set the floor too early. >> : It is not offensive, but there's nothing there. >> Dave: Right.
>> Julianna: Okay. So we're gonna rate it at. >> Dave: You do better, guys. Come on. >> : All right. >> Julianna: Okay. Next is going to be the sprinter peach. >> Dave: Well, uh, this has aroma. >> Speaker E: I remember I was at a tasting once, and one of, one of my country sales reps said, like, well, that's got a lot of flavor to it. >> : No. >> Julianna: So the. The peach is peach candy smelling. Yes, it's there.
>> Dave: Tastes good right up until the end, and then it doesn't. >> : I would. It reminds me. >> Dave: Interesting. >> : Uh, that's like somebody handed me a, um, an icy, uh, that was peach. >> Speaker E: Ah. >> : Flavored. You know, um, it's so sweet and artificial. >> Speaker E: Strangely, I like this more than the lime one. I don't know why, but. >> Julianna: No, I do, too. The only issue that I have is at the
end. It's like the carbonation is, like, chalky at the end or something. Does that make sense? >> Speaker E: It definitely. It definitely takes, like, candy. Like, this is. >> Julianna: Oh, yeah. Up front. Yes. >> Speaker E: We have used science to create money back on this. No, sorry. >> : It is just so fake. It is just. It is just so. >> Speaker E: It seems sweeter, too. Like, that's. That's the other thing than the citrus for.
>> Julianna: So the light. Yeah, yeah, the lime. Yeah. >> : This is so artificial. >> Dave: Uh, this is like when you, if you had a peach knee high and you poured it in ice, and then you drank all of the knee high, and then you just have the ice melted. Yeah. >> : Um, that's. >> Speaker E: There's. Yeah, there's no booze. >> : Oh, no. >> Speaker E: This doesn't even remotely taste like alcohol, which maybe that's
the point, right? We're getting the candy sweetness. And I mean. Okay, feed me a second time. >> Julianna: Oh, and at the top of each can, obviously, no added sugar, and it's 100 calories gluten free. >> Dave: So that means aspartame, I guess, if there's no sugar. >> : Well, um, to me, you know, aspartame leaves like that weird. You know, can't get it off your tongue. Yeah. Like, please, you know, scrape my tongue. >> Dave: I don't get a lot of that, that flavor, but I'm
getting. I get kind of sensation, though. Like, it's. It kind of dries my mouth. >> : Like, you want to spit out. >> Dave: Look at my head. Starting to hurt. >> : Uh, so I'm going to try to be using some, uh, very famous Kardashian phrases today. And this one, uh, rhymes. Me, I don't want to be walking around like some peasant. I'm royalty. That's what Scott Disick said when, uh, they were in England, so, you know. Yeah. Peasant water. >> Julianna: And what does he do?
>> : Yeah, that's exactly the question you should ask the entire time. What do you do, and what is. >> Speaker E: It you would say that you do? Do? >> Dave: I think you said it right. >> : Do. Do. Oh, my gosh. Um. >> Dave: Yeah, I don't know, man. Yeah. >> : Yeah. I'm sorry. >> Dave: I felt like we better, but then it did. >> Julianna: Ah. >> Dave: The other way. >> Julianna: It dipped. Yep. Okay. We are rating this one.
>> Dave: Nothing. >> : If you were aiming for the bottom, you hit it, man. >> Julianna: Okay, now let's go to the gin and juice apricot. >> Speaker E: I'm sorry. Did you say gin and jews? >> Dave: That's why we invited you to be on. >> Speaker E: Thanks, guys. Well, thanks. I mean, last month was gin and juice, you know? >> Julianna: Yes. >> Dave: Sip an o. >> Julianna: Gin, 5.9% abv. Now, this one is gin with real juice. Apricot honey.
>> Speaker E: Apricot honey. >> Julianna: No, apricot honey, comma, it's got apricot honey, honey, comma, bergamot, and natural flavors. >> Speaker E: Bergamot. >> : I get something sweet on the nose. >> Speaker E: You can actually smell this one. This one, actually. >> Julianna: This smells pleasant. Yeah. This smells like a cocktail. >> : This smells. This has a very faint apricot. Um, I like this.
>> Speaker E: I would like, almost like a coconutty kind of thing. >> Dave: Or I'm telling you, dude, if you use this as a mixer and actually put some alcohol in it, you might have some. >> : This is, um. This is ambrosia all the way. There's, like, 20 different artificial fruits now. >> Dave: But see, see, for me, though, the last one tasted like fake peach. This actually has, like, uh, like, taste. >> Julianna: The apricot, like, is you.
>> Dave: Because it's not just super sweet. >> : There is definitely a citrus fruit in this. Um, you know, that is not unpleasant. >> Julianna: No, it's just a bergamot. I mean, bergamot and gin is always nice. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> Julianna: You know what I mean? >> : It's. >> Speaker E: It's weird, though, because there's definitely similarly to the last one we had. There's certainly a pronounced bitterness towards the end. So that seems to be
a theme. A theme with this particular thing. >> Julianna: It's harder to swallow than regular water, but in a good way. >> Speaker E: No, I I'm almost getting. I'm not really picking up on the bergamot, but there's something really, like, tropical and weird about it. >> : I don't know. That's what I'm saying. Is it? You know, it has that ambrosia salad kind of thing going on where you have some cherry and peach and apple and pineapple
and trying to pull it out. Some non distinguishable fruit cup, you know, experience. Yeah. >> Speaker E: Non distinguishable fruit cup experience was a band that I was in in high school. >> : Cool. Actually, you guys get, uh, all the good bookings. >> Speaker E: Always. >> : They were one of those. >> Dave: They were one of those bands that wear their underwear outside their pants. Yeah. >> : Hmm. >> Speaker E: M non distinguishable cup experience.
>> Dave: M I think that's the name of this episode. >> : Yeah, possibly. >> Julianna: Yeah. >> : I think it's going to be. Take a number, please. You know, because, uh. Yeah, you know, Kardashians. Yeah, the Kardashians. Uh, you know, the number of spouses they have is, you know, definitely driven by nothing more than a ticket number system that's in the corner, you know? >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> : Now serving spouse number eight. Kylie, you're up.
>> Julianna: Wow. Um, I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that I kind of tolerate this one. I don't know why. And maybe it is that sort of, like, muted ambrosia enos of it. >> Speaker E: But of the four that we have tried, this is definitely my favorite. >> Julianna: Yeah. >> Speaker E: I still am not getting a massive gin blast out of it. >> Julianna: No. But, um. >> Dave: But I almost feel like, at this point, asking for gin presents is, we.
>> Julianna: Know it's not gonna happen. Right. Right. >> Dave: Set that aside. >> Speaker E: I think what's, from a marketing standpoint, the. The Kylie Jenner thing. Absolutely. This should be a tall and skinny, right? >> Dave: Yeah, sure. >> Speaker E: But Snoop's thing, I'm really disappointed this isn't in, like, a, uh, 24, 32. >> : Ounce malt liquor can. >> Speaker E: Yeah. Like, it needs to be an absolute. It's gotta be. And you gotta bump up the
booze. I mean, this is, I guess, which. >> Julianna: They have from four and a half sprinter to five. Nine. >> Speaker E: This has got to be nine plus. >> Dave: This has got it all liquor, dude. >> Speaker E: Yeah, you got to get. I mean, the first thing I would do is if this came in a bigger thing is I would squeeze a lime in it and then pour more. Jenna. >> Dave: Well, let me ask you this, though. Like, so for the sprinter, it's pretty clear, like, who this
is. Marketing. >> Speaker E: That's what I'm saying. >> Julianna: Right. >> Dave: Like, who are you? >> Julianna: The gin and juice. Who are they? >> Dave: Who's the target audience? >> Speaker E: It might be.
>> : I would say it aligns very well with the target audience they have for their shows, respectively, which is, you know, people that are just in the absence of actually having three brain cells to rub together to know the difference between just, like, pure crap and, you know, something entertaining. So, yeah, I mean, these are both. >> Speaker E: Aimed at the same target audience that is going for this
particular product. It's just kind of funny to me because I feel like the Jenner piece, like, lines up a lot better. >> : Well, you know, I'm sitting. You're thinking, you know, if I were probably in managing a brand, if I, you know, if I had Colt 45, I'd be grabbing snoop, uh, all day long. And sure, man, this is. Aligning with your audience does, too, in. >> Speaker E: A much larger container with more booze. Like, that's. >> Dave: Well, but, like, Snoop has done corona ads.
>> : Yeah. I just don't see, you know, the alignment that with, you know, his particular audience. >> Dave: I get that because, like, you know, beach pot, party music, you know, I can see the corona like this. I mean, I guess younger generation now. >> : M. If they had Martha Stewart on the beach with a corona, you know, with. I saw her bikini with it, you know, and that's different things.
>> Julianna: But I'm wondering if maybe that's what they're like. What you briefly touched on is snoop and Dre have been around forever. Okay. We remember the beginning. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> Julianna: Okay. >> Speaker E: It's true. >> Julianna: Right. But maybe they're trying to attract another younger crowd. And what's going to be a younger crowd, but something more like this. >> Speaker E: Right, exactly. >> : Right.
>> Speaker E: Because younger audiences, they don't. >> Julianna: They don't remember that. They don't know the history. >> Speaker E: They don't want beer. They don't want molliquity. They want the light. >> Dave: Yeah. And I think also, you get to a point where you're so big, you can basically slap your name on pretty much anything. >> : I'm just thinking of some kid in Compton that's drinking this drink and people going, dude, man, seriously, that is nastiest
stuff. You know, that drink would never, never be consumed in Compton, but you would get murdered. You would. That would just be, like, flashing and going, shoot me here. >> Julianna: I know. >> : Well, let's rate this up. >> Dave: Uh, okay, I'm going the other way. >> : So the flavor machine has definitely been imposed on Dave. >> Julianna: Okay, Dave's push. Kicking this up to a three. The apricots, a three from gin and juice. >> : Wow.
>> Dave: I didn't think my one vote would carry, but. Okay. All right, now, who's in charge? Mike. >> : Yeah. >> Julianna: All right, let's get into some story time. >> : Sick. Some venomous spiders on you, Dave. That's what I'm about to do. >> Julianna: Ooh. >> : Yeah. So, uh, uh, you know, summertimes is upon us, and so are the bugs that have, uh, uh, come out of the woodwork. And in this case, it's about venomous flying
spiders. So the venom from the jaro spider doesn't pose a danger to humans or pets. That's what they always say. Like, for the people that just sit around all day and go, no, really, it's not going to hurt you. I know they're big and nasty and. Yeah, sure, no problem. Reports of venomous flying spiders posed poised to invade the United States may seem scary to some, but multiple spider experts told Fox News Digital there's a great outlet this week that concern there is no threat to humans or
pets. Trust me. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> Dave: You know, Fox News said so. >> : Fox News said so. Yeah. The yarrow spider, an invasive species. There you have. That's all you need right there, people, is it's declared an invasive species, like originally from Asia.
>> Dave: Yeah. >> : Uh, was first officially cited in the United States about ten years ago by Doctor David Nelson, a professor of biology and allied health department of the Southern Adventist University of Tennessee. Said. Phone interview. Uh, wait a second. We. We are in this guy's backyard, and I don't know where the southern Adventist university in Tennessee is. That is like, is that just south of Hohenwald where, you know, if you have at least three of your natural teeth.
>> Dave: Cool. >> : You're in, man. >> Speaker E: You're in. Yeah. You're in Pesach. >> : You're qualified. That's right. >> Dave: Outside birds. >> : Yeah, I mean, uh, you know, you can, like, wear real shoes. We're gonna call you doctor David. >> Dave: Get Mister Highfalutin wearing his loafers. >> : Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is where you write your doctoral, uh, thesis and go to just drop dead and eat sonic every weekend. So there you go.
Wow. There's more of a nuisance than anything. Nielsen said they're going to decorate your house with webs. Cool. >> Dave: Awesome. >> : Great. No, could we bring them in for the holidays? Uh, that tend to aggregate together in large communities and, uh, that can actually bother people as opposed to non bothersome spiders. Anyway, they're, uh, large size and their leg can grow up to four inches. Okay. Yeah. >> Speaker E: Kill it with fire. >> Dave: So burn the house.
>> : Thinking, if you have a mullet, would that be the appropriate hairstyle to be able to thwart? >> Dave: Would the spiders grow in your molly? >> : That is correct. Um. Um, so, uh, uh, but as far as venom is concerned, they're not really hearing reports from China or Korea about the envenomous Enris oh. >> Dave: Because we know China is a great source of rewarding when things. >> : So, team really rock a, uh, spider soul.
>> Dave: Jesus Christ. We just got banned again. >> : I just, uh, uh. I love it. Spider. So he fry from this into the room over here. >> Dave: We just got canceled. I'm literally watching us get canceled over and over. >> : We only have, like, 18 people that listen to us in China anyway, so there, uh, definitely are big. Oh, China's. >> Dave: Listen, buddy. >> : So, uh, they catch all kinds of things in your yard, like small children, probably your cousins.
>> Julianna: Oh, nice. >> : Like flies and wasps and bees and butterflies. >> Speaker E: Oh, my gosh. >> : They're actually going after butterflies. We got to kill these things. So, um. Um. Yeah, so you know what's weird? Spiders. >> Dave: Butterflies don't taste like butter. And I'm not going to tell you how I found that out, but, uh, it was. >> : I only have. I only have 30 seconds here, so I'm going to get to
the, uh. Uh. But they don't pose a danger to humans, so they're incredibly docile. Uh, uh, says another doctor David, a different dick. Doctor David Coyle, who's the assistant professor of Clemson University in South Carolina. I wonder if he and other Doctor David get together. What kind of. They probably drink these drinks anyway, play with spiders together. So, uh. Oh, anyway, we'll, uh, we'll be back. >> Julianna: Welcome back, everyone. >> Speaker E: Hello.
>> Julianna: Hello. So, today we're doing a little head to head summer of questionable decisions. We are, um, pitting Kylie Jenner and or Kardashians. >> : Look out for the spiders. >> Julianna: Yes. So we're doing sprinter premium vodka and fruit flavored beverages. >> Speaker E: Oh, you're deaf. >> : Okay. Thank you. >> Julianna: Love you. Against gin and juice from Snoop and Doctor Dre. No.
>> Dave: Which sound clip is going into the Rock and Roll hall of Fame this month? >> : Really? >> Dave: Yeah. >> : Okay. >> Speaker E: Good for him, man. >> : Wow. >> Julianna: And, uh, right before the break, good old boy Mike was talking about some special spiders. >> : Well, there wasn't a whole lot more to the story. I'm gonna let you guys just make up the rest, because I think that would be more entertaining.
>> Dave: Well, let me ask you this, Mike. So, okay, so, in the fifties or whenever, they brought kudzu over from Asia, invasive species. Now, it kills trees. Then they brought the carp, japanese carp, over, invasive species, they jump out of the water and hit people in the face. >> Speaker E: That's right. >> : They interrupt why I'm trying to do bass fish. >> Dave: Now, these spiders are here, and. Oh, that's not a big deal. Their venom is not bad.
>> : But this is about population control in the state of Alabama. That's what this is about, Dave, I get it, man. >> Dave: I get it. >> Speaker E: Don't forget the lantern flies. >> : We get them big spiders to come over here and actually bite some of the people in Alabama and kill off like about 14% of them. This is what I'm talking about. Good population. >> Dave: I thought the population control was based on the very loosely worded was actually.
>> : Based on drinking these beverages because this will actually kill people faster than the spider. >> Speaker E: So reminds me of, yeah, this is uh, you know, one thing that I have to say is I hate that my job and my family is spider killer. Like there's, there's multiple degrees, there's strapping. >> : Young lads YouTube video to train other young men. >> Dave: So even if Sam sees one, is it dad can kill this?
>> Speaker E: Yeah, dad, there's, there's, there's a bug. >> : Don't you, don't you throw the smallest child, you know, right towards it to go get that, you know, man, that's a dwarf tossing. You know, like, you know what you uh, get, put your hands out. >> Dave: Get one of those bug guns, you know, that shoots. Yeah, yeah, I have one of those. >> Speaker E: You know what happens when you attack, uh, a bug with one of those things? Usually great.
>> Julianna: Oh, you really? >> : Well, I mean, this really enhances the flavor. I mean it's nothing like having a 300 six to blow the crap out of one of these four inch critters. I mean, you know that trim needed to be replaced anyway. >> Dave: I can see my, certain people in my family using an AR 15 to try to get rid. >> Julianna: Of course.
>> : Do you put it on automatic or semi? You know, for that? You know, cuz I mean, usually spiders you can get within two or three good bullets. >> Dave: Honey, go get the bump stock. >> Speaker E: There's um. I, I just never wanted that job. I don't want to be the bug killer. I'll do it. And then they're like, oh, I don't, don't know, take it outside. It's like, I'm sorry. If you, if you contract me to do this job, I'm doing it my way.
>> Julianna: Yeah. >> Speaker E: And it's going to be a burial. >> : I think my favorite part of this story is thinking about good small talk with doctor David. It's like how do you go up and introduce yourself? You're in a casual, it's like, hey, I'm Doctor David. I actually, uh, do research on large venomous spiders. I mean, it's like, where do you go from there? You know, it's like. So what's your favorite color, man?
>> Speaker E: Do you know the queso? No. The next thing, I do, research on venomous spiders. Here's one right here. >> : So I got some pictures. The video of them biting me here on my phone. Let me show them to you. >> Dave: I don't know how it happened, but, like, on my, like, Instagram reels and, like, my YouTube thing, it's all these guys who collect poisonous snakes, and they're like, oh, I just got this super, uh, deadly bushmaster, you know, thing. Watch me, watch me.
>> : Are you saying they're like whole social media groups of people that, you know, like, dangerous activities? >> Dave: This is my, uh, king. >> : These beverages. >> Dave: This is my new king Cobra. Spiffy, you know, and. Oh, Spiffy's in a bad mood. Oh, no, he just took off half my face. >> Speaker E: Now, Mike, no spiffy shirt. Now, Mike, you were talking about population control. There you go. >> : There's a. There's a flip side of darwinian theory.
>> Speaker E: Yeah. >> : You know, so this is what this. >> Speaker E: Do you want a gerbil? Yeah, something that will kill you in five minutes. >> : We can combine the gerbils and the spider, where we could do population control in advanced property, uh, populations in Alabama. Because, you know, they. They're probably, you know, I mean, you. >> Dave: Know, that's how the whole thing really started in Florida, I think, with
the. The pythons and all that is, like, when the floods happened from Katrina or wherever. >> : Oh, yeah. They all got out of their homes. I washed out. >> Dave: And now, you know, guys are stopping in the middle of the highway in Florida. Twelve foot python. >> : Look at me. Take a good selfie, you know? Hey, watch me put my whole hand in this. How come? >> Speaker E: This is how, like, all this stuff is, like, mainly happening in the south. I feel.
>> : I feel great. >> Dave: Where? >> Speaker E: Mind, never mind. >> : I think. I think it's because these beverages are popular in the south part of the. Of the US. That's the reason why. Yeah, that's true. >> Speaker E: It's probably not. >> : You never get anybody from Wyoming drinking these beverages. You know, that's the reason why. Yeah. Cause. >> Speaker E: Yeah, they just drink raw milk and.
>> : Yeah, you start the bird flu pandemic. If you want stuff like California to happen here in Wyoming, drink these beverages. >> Speaker E: Yeah. >> Julianna: Okay, let's get back to people in. >> Dave: Wyoming drink their own urine. >> : Ooh. Hey, now. >> Dave: Not because they have to. >> Speaker E: The last time. >> : Hey, canadian rich. Water Nobel. >> Speaker E: You know, the last time, Dave, that you did that, uh. You're in trouble.
>> : I'm not gonna say what? I would rate that. >> Julianna: Okay, okay. Okay. Let's get back to this stuff. >> Dave: Back to business, guys. >> Julianna: Yeah. So next up, is the sprinter grapefruit again, four and a half percent. Absolutely. 100 calories, gluten free. All the pretty things. >> Dave: I think this describes the Kardashians, too. They smell good, but once you taste them, it's like, m not so great. >> : It does. You know, it has a
perfume quality. You know about it. A very floral thing, uh, that's going on. Not grapefruit. >> Dave: Actually, this is not. This is maybe my favorite. One of the sprinters. >> Speaker E: Of the sprinters. Absolutely. >> : The aroma reminds me of jasmine. If I had to probably pick a Pinterest pinky up. He was like, I've walked by a jasmine tree, and then somebody handed me a sprite and said, isn't this all working well? And I go, no, not really.
>> Dave: It's weird, you know, we've had, like, seven of these things or something, and I feel less drunk. >> Speaker E: It's true. >> Julianna: Um, it's. I mean, it's what I've lost. >> Dave: Seven Pam filled. >> : It's okay. >> Speaker E: It's not. It's innocuous. Right. >> Julianna: I'm feeling, though, that these are just all very drawing. Is that, like, the takeaway that people here are getting?
>> Speaker E: Yes, it's definitely drying, but that's for a reason. >> Julianna: Well, yeah. Yeah. So, okay, so that's doing well. >> Speaker E: You just keep pounding them. >> Julianna: Yeah, keep pounding them. >> Speaker E: Yeah, eventually. >> Julianna: What, after 20? Yeah. >> Speaker E: I'm so thirsty. Yeah, this is definitely the. I'd say the most. It's innocuous. There is no booze. A lot of great things.
>> Dave: If you were invited to, like, a pool party and all they had was. >> : This, uh, were sprinters, I know exactly what I'd be doing. >> Dave: Turnaround leaf. >> : I would be. I'd go, wow, it's so considerate that you, you know, serving this, and I'd walk over in the corner and pour out, like, three fourths of the can, and I'd go, oh, uh, I'm all out of this one. Sorry.
>> Speaker E: That would go down one of two ways. One, I would either shotgun, like, three of them to get to the buzz level, start that I need to get to, or I would go hunting around for some more booze to add to it. >> : Yeah, well, I know where I'm at for the grapefruit sprinter. >> Julianna: I mean, we're gonna go to. Yeah, we're gonna go to. Okay, now, it's pseudo counterpart, if you will, is going to be the gin and juice melon next.
M and, um, this one is watermelon, hibiscus, and natural flavors with gin. >> : Hmm. Again, a very floral nose off of this. >> Speaker E: Yeah. Definitely floral in the nose. >> : That's more so hibiscus, you know, maybe gardenia. >> Dave: Um, you know, it frightens me that you. >> Julianna: I know a lot of flowers. >> : I know this many flowers. >> Dave: It's like, who's that weird guy who keeps hanging out the florist, you know?
>> : Wow. >> Speaker E: Hey, who's that guy that keeps eating all our gardenias? >> : I knew that was coming. Pardon me, ladies. >> Speaker E: Damn it. >> Dave: You mind if I, uh, sniff your tulips? >> Speaker E: So this is it. Okay. I didn't. In my mind, I didn't realize that was melon. I thought it was watermelon. >> Julianna: Right. I was thinking melon is in watermelon. >> : Cantaloupe. Melon, you know? >> Dave: Yeah, the watermelon.
>> Speaker E: So definitely more herbal on the you know what or floral. >> Dave: Uh, that. That's a stereotype. >> : So this is very. This is. This almost tastes like a cornucopia of a, uh, cantaloupe mourning thing. >> Julianna: Yeah. >> : It has a lot more aroma that is closer to honeydew and straight up cantaloupe and everything. >> Dave: This has a nice botanical quality that would almost remind you of gin.
>> Julianna: Yeah. This is the geniest of the interesting. >> : True. I would say probably closer to very herbal forward, you know, uh, gins. >> Dave: Um, maybe like a janeifer or something. >> Speaker E: The. >> Dave: But not as. >> Speaker E: And I was. Frankly, I was a little bit concerned because usually watermelon flavored things, like, just gross me out because it's usually so artificial.
>> Dave: It almost always ends up either tasting, like, watermelon candy or cucumber. Like, it's, like, usually one or the other. >> Speaker E: Yeah, I'm almost picking up a little bit of cucumber from that. >> : That is. >> Julianna: And that's the right thing, like, into the vegetal side of watermelon as opposed to the. >> : Definitely going down that Hendrix. >> Speaker E: Yeah, this would be great if you poured, like, some Hendrix.
>> : If you pour some Hendrix and put some real cucumber in this. Yeah. You know, you could just pour that out and pour the Hendricks and the cucumber in and just drink the Hendrix. Right. >> Speaker E: Just drink Hendrix. >> Julianna: Yeah. This, uh. >> Speaker E: You're welcome, Hendricks. That was a free plug for your delightful product. >> Julianna: Oh, and speaking of which. >> Speaker E: Hey, wait a second. It just so happens we, as we.
>> : Have shown, tell time. Yeah. >> Julianna: Yeah. So, yeah, so we happen to have a little bit of Hendrix. And adding that in spot. >> Speaker E: That's what alcohol tastes like. I forgot. >> Julianna: Okay. >> Speaker E: I forgot. No, I put a little splash in there. Oh, sorry. Um, yeah, that's much more. That's much more tolerable. If it was a little bit colder. If it's a little bit colder. No doubt, no doubt. >> : We're gonna fix this.
>> Speaker E: This reminds me, I love Hendrix. >> : Totally. >> Speaker E: I was at a Michelin starred restaurant in Vegas one time shortly after Hendrix came out, and the bartenders didn't really know what it was, and I told them, like, no, no, you need to add a cucumber. They looked at me like I was from Mars, but, oh, it. I've always loved that. Um. >> Dave: God, so solid is a great, affordable, go to workhorse.
>> : Yeah, I would say that. The thing I like about. So we're all tasting the Hendricks, you know, dropped in this. And, um, the thing I like about this is there are a group of people that they just do not like the flavor of tonic, you know, quinine, bitter. >> Speaker E: Those. Those are people that get malaria. >> : Yeah, exactly. >> Dave: And that's darwinism.
>> : But I think this is a very interesting, you know, side mixer, um, for people that they're looking for something other than a club soda, you know, to probably have, you know, with Hendrix. Uh, I like this because it actually. They don't fight with each other. They're actually complementing each other. You know, it does quite well. And even probably at the dilution was 50 50 in the way we were probably tasting it here on the fly. It actually works. >> Speaker E: It does, yeah.
>> Julianna: Yeah. This is like. >> : I love the fixed version, uh, for sure. But the one, you know, out of, uh, out of the can, you know, I'm kind of right there. >> Dave: This is. >> : This is probably the least offensive product. >> Julianna: We'Ve had so far. So the gin and juice melon, we're going to rate it a, uh, three. >> Dave: But however, because of the. >> : But if you add the Hendricks. Yeah. >> Julianna: Then it's a four.
>> : Oh, yeah. >> Julianna: Okay, last up, we have sprinter, um, black cherry and. Interesting. >> Speaker E: That's kind of racist. >> Julianna: It's got a little. It has color of color to. >> : There's color in these. So people go, oh, it looks like you have something interesting. >> Speaker E: It. >> Julianna: Wait, it is, like, slightly. Yeah, slightly tinted in my hand, Kylie. >> : Because, you know, Kim holds this on.
>> Julianna: There's a slight pinky purple enos to it. >> Speaker E: Oh, I can see with my magic. >> Julianna: Yeah. Okay. I could see with my magic glasses. Yeah. And the electrical. You have to pee or you go with your diaper. Kind of artificial black cherry. And this is not what I was hoping for. Oh, boy. Okay. >> : Uh, so you guys, you just only heard the sound effect of, uh, sparky almost hurling, you know, his sample all the way across the table here.
So I had a moment. We should have like a, uh, like a safety shield, you know? So spatoon. >> Speaker E: A spitoon. >> Dave: Like a salad bar. >> Speaker E: Okay, okay. Let me just say something. Cherry is my favorite flavor on the planet. >> : Not this. >> Speaker E: I have said so many different iterations of that flavor in my life. >> : This. >> Speaker E: This is like if AI generated the black chain really poorly.
>> : Oh, yeah. Uh, yeah, it is. Uh, definitely. >> Julianna: This is. There's. There's nothing to say about this. This is just. >> : Yeah, this is a bad idea. >> Julianna: We're gonna rate this a one. >> : Oh, yeah. >> Julianna: Okay. This is just a one, please. >> Speaker E: Zero. >> : No, Kylie, Kylie, do better. >> Julianna: Yeah. Okay, so wait, before we. >> : Before we get.
So. I love the clip that we pulled off in this clip with the Kardashians, and you have. Dave's pulled this off, uh, to play it. So this is such a great moment. And the reason why the black cherry sprinter probably exists is because of this moment where they're driving around in the car. Oh, you're deaf. >> Speaker E: Okay, thank you. >> Julianna: Love you. >> : So they were driving around asking people for directions, and they pulled up to this person that was
deaf. She was. >> Dave: They wanted some cuban coffee. >> : Talking to her like she can hear her go, oh, you're deaf. That's the reason why I can't get directions to a coffee shop. >> Julianna: Oh, God. Okay, that was great. Now, last but not least, we're going to do the, um, gin and juice, passion fruit, lemon, um, lime. >> : I'm going to give it a real juice, solid. >> Julianna: Two passion fruit, pineapple, ginger, and other flavors.
>> Speaker E: I definitely get the ginger out of it. >> Dave: Ginger's nice. Like, this might be another one you could use as a mixer. >> Speaker E: I liked Mary Ann better, and I. >> Julianna: Could taste the pineapple in it, too. More so than the passion. >> Speaker E: Much more tropical. >> Julianna: Yeah. >> Speaker E: And the ginger's got a nice little spice to it. >> Julianna: But as the tonic to a gin and tonic, again, this might be nice.
>> : I would say take, uh, these to a wedding that you don't like the people getting married. >> Julianna: Okay. >> Dave: I wish. Yeah. >> Julianna: And we'll. Yeah, we're gonna rate this at two. Okay, well, yeah, this is an, um, some request on my decisions as it is. >> : I don't think a lot of these products have been out that long either. I really wonder what the half life is going to be on these, you know?
Do you think they'll last in the marketplace more than six months, you know? >> Speaker E: No. I mean, not with the names. I mean, you need something bold and gigantic. >> Dave: Not in their current configuration. >> Julianna: Um, yeah. Okay. >> Speaker E: There's too many. >> : Say goodbye. >> Julianna: Yeah, we do have to say goodbye. Okay, everybody good old boy, Mike. >> : That's it. Goodbye, everybody.
>> Julianna: Okay, see ya. Uh, Abcdefg. Good old boy, Sparky. Thanks for being here. Good old boy, Dave. Thanks for being here. >> : Bye. >> Julianna: This is Kudokao Julianna. Cheers. >> Announcer: We hope you enjoyed this episode. If you're listening to us online, do yourself a favor and tap, just tap it in the subscribe button. >> : Give it a little tappy. >> Speaker E: Tap, tap tap a roo.
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