Introspection as a Career Strategy: Wayfinding Without a Map

This period in your career is such an important turning point , and it's a crucial opportunity to design the kind of research career that really works for you so that you're able to write and lead these big , career-fueling research project grants .

It's not easy to figure out what you really want when you have so many different voices in your ear telling you what to do and how to do it , but it is possible to design a career that's fulfilling and meaningful to you while also securing enough grant funding to sustain your lab and make an impact with your research .

That's what we're talking about here on Significant Impact , with me , sarah Dobson , nih grant consultant and academic career coach . Tune in for an honest look at what it really takes to be successful in the world of NIH grant funding .

Start thinking differently about what an academic career looks like , one that's driven by purpose and curiosity and a healthy dose of disruptive energy . So a couple of months ago , I was shocked that I was able to recover this document , and so I ended up going through and pretty much reading the whole thing , and I wanted to talk about that today .

Obviously , in broad strokes , I'm not going to read you my diary or anything , but I wanted to talk about what I discovered and how it relates to what I'm doing and the work that we do together inside K to R Essentials .

And I know that this episode is a little bit different from what we normally talk about because it is a bit more personal , but I think it's so relevant to what we do and I wanted to bring this angle into it , because what was so fascinating about discovering this journal and rereading it was that I could see the seeds of the work that I am doing now , and

so I want to talk a little bit more about what that is . So you know , 12-ish years ago I was in a very different place . I was really struggling to figure out what I wanted , both personally and professionally . I was doing a lot of therapy and that is a lot of what showed up in my journal .

So I was writing in this journal pretty much every day , often multiple times a day , and really grappling with big questions about what I want for myself and the goals that I have and do I even have a right to have these goals ?

And then the flip side of that , which is the disappointments that I was experiencing and grappling with all of these disappointments , and what I think is most important about all of that was the way that I was in dialogue with myself , like I was really having a conversation with myself in writing for years and doing my best to make sense of who I am as a

person and who I want to be , and the delta between who I am at the moment and who I want to be , both in terms of my character and my aspirations and my achievements , and it I mean , let me tell you I was so moved by reading all of this again .

I was in a weird kind of funk for probably two full weeks , I would say , you know , going back and rereading this journal just in part , I think , recognizing how far I'd come , but also just having so much compassion and sadness for this person and where she was and what she was grappling with .

But , like I said , I saw in that dialogue that I was having with myself the seeds of the work that I do now .

So one former student , a graduate of K-R Essentials , described what we do in the program as guided introspection , and I really obviously saw a lot of that introspection in the journal , in the posts that I was putting in this journal , and what I realized in rereading all of that was how important it was , of course , for me back then to be introspective and to

really confront myself and be honest with myself and really deal with some big , scary things . But just that process of being introspective and and being honest has allowed me to obviously better understand myself but be a lot more compassionate with myself , and that in turn has allowed me to accomplish all of those things that I was struggling with back then .

And so what I realized in rereading all of that was I am bringing a lot of that self-inquiry , that dialogue , into what we do in the program because of how important it was for me . And that's not to say that I am encouraging anybody in K-R Essentials to air their dirty laundry or confront their demons in a group setting . That's not it at all .

But I think the piece that is really important is the honesty and the work of getting really honest with yourself . In the case of the work that we're doing , it's being honest with yourself about your capacity , about your willingness to do a particular piece of work or engage with a particular colleague on a project .

It's getting really honest about your aspirations , about your goals , about the impact that you want to have , and not shying away from your ambition . It is being honest with yourself in order to communicate well with your colleagues .

Everybody understands what is going on , and that honesty is so crucial , and I think it's really easy to be dishonest , to lie to ourselves about what is really going on , how we're really feeling , what our goals and ambitions really are , and so it's vital to take the time to actually sit down and be in dialogue with yourself and really develop that relationship

with yourself , and I know , obviously , how helpful it is for me . But one of the things that I hear over and over again from graduates of the program is that they are taking that practice with them after they complete their time in the program . They are regularly going to revisit their North Star , they are regularly going to check in with themselves .

They are regularly going to revisit their North Star . They are regularly going to check in with themselves . They are regularly going to celebrate wins and successes , because they also recognize how valuable it is to be introspective , to be in dialogue with yourself and to really develop that relationship with yourself . And so I just want to leave you with that .

Today , this strange little coincidence , I suppose that I came across this journal that spanned a really turbulent time in my life and , looking back , really informed the work that I do today and who I am today .

So if I can leave you with a piece of advice which , of course , as always , you can take or leave it's to find a way to be in dialogue with yourself , whether that's keeping a journal , whether that's meditating , whether that's just finding quiet and space to really hear yourself . I think that that is so important .

Especially in the times we are in , where we are bombarded with news and information and speed and all kinds of demands and responsibilities . It is so important to carve out that time to be with yourself and to really be able to hear what it is that you are saying . So that is it for this week , my friends . I will see you next time .

Thanks for listening to this episode of significant impact Impact from K Award to your first big R01 . If you want to dig deeper into what we learned today and move a significant step closer to a smooth K-R transition , visit sarahdobsonco slash pod and check out all the free stuff we have to help you do just that .

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