MONEY DIARIES: Letting Go Of Your Ego

Hello, my name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yr

Let's get into it.

She's on the Money.

She's on the Money.

Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom.

Welcome back to.

Another one of our money diaries where I get the opportunity to talk to one of our incredible She's on the Money community members all about their journey. Let's jump straight into it, because this week I got a message and it went like this.

HI ve growing up.

In a barefoot investor household and studying commerce, so I always thought I had a good grip on my finances. But after a bad and manipulative relationship I was left with nothing in my bank account. After a year of living on my own, I was still struggling, so I decided to move back in with my parents. And I'm feeling so many emotions. I would love to share my experience of letting go of my ego and starting again.

So I'm excited to be here.

Welcome to the show. Oh my gosh, I'm excited to have you.

Thank you.

All right, let's dive straight into it.

The first question I always ask is moneyt If I forced you to give your money habits a grade from A through to F, what would you give your money habits.

I'm gonna say it's a solid B, a.

Solid be all right, let's learn a little bit more about it with my favorite question of all time, money Diarist, Can you tell me a little bit more about your money story?

Sure? So, it probably would be beneficial to start from the start studying. Yep, may as well.

Growing up, I was always really independent. I always had a job, and I always had money coming through my bank account.

So I guess like.

My attitude towards money was really relaxed because I always knew my bills were going to get paid. I was gonna have another paycheck comes through in the next fortnight. I felt pretty secure and pretty laid back about everything, and as well, like, yeah, in the environment I grew up and I was super privileged. I had parents who were really into the barefoot investor that changed their life. I have a dad for an accountant, so like he is a spreadsheet.

King, so's mine. I feel like same literally same.

Yeah, and it's like every single holiday or every single expense is meticulously planned with a spreadsheet.

So yeah.

No, I definitely had a wealth of resources around me. And I even did a degree in commerce as well.

Ooh that's sexy.

Yeah yeah, economics and finance is my seeing.

Who just drops that?

Oh yeah, I also just did a degree in economics, No.

Biggie, and I work in a bank, so.

You're surrounded by money and then when you're bored, you're like, oh my gosh, when I'm not surrounded by money, I'm going to listen to a money podcast.

Right' I love that you Yeah. Yeah.

No, So growing up and even now, like I just have such a wealth of resources around me. And I know I'm very privileged in that respect to have that, but I always was so laid back with my finances and budgeting. I didn't really do much, if that makes sense.

It just worked.

Is that because your parents were good at being barefoot investor followers.

Or like, how did that come to fruition?

Was that something that they had done since you can remember, or did they introduce that a little bit later in life?

Like what did that look like?

I mean, I won't go too far into their money story, but it really changed their world, Like.

From when I was younger.

I didn't really know too much about it, but I definitely saw that tool change their mindset growing up. So I saw this development and change in them over the years.

And yeah, I guess.

After seeing that, you know, I thought I was exactly the same and that I didn't really need to do any kind of budgeting or build up a spreadsheet or anything like that. I didn't think that that was necessary because I had all these resources.

And that kind of makes sense because once you have been taught like a structure, and you have a solid framework and you kind of work towards that and that's just kind of your default which it's not for many, Right, if that's your default, you're kind of like, well, why would I do a budget because I already have a really good handle of what's coming in and what's going out,

Of course you need.

A budget, but it's all these different experiences where, yeah, I find it really cool that you grew up with the barefoot method because it is such a tried and true method of just going, okay, well this amount goes here, and this amount goes there, and you don't have to meticulously track it each and every single day or even each month, but it can just work.

Is that still how you work when it comes to money?

Definitely not.

I'm definitely in a discovery phase, i'd say, of what works and what doesn't and actually being open to different resources to try to figure out what am I like working towards and how can I get there? With something that works for how I operate.

I guess.

Yeah, Now, this is a really pointed question, because please don't get me wrong, I actually really like the Barefoot method, but I find it was written for a demographic of

Yeah?

I mean I tried this method or my version of this method, because I had a bit of an ego, so I kind of half did it, and it just wasn't working. I wasn't seeing results for me. And then I went through a pretty rough relationship where I just used all my buckets because I thought that, you know, if there's still money coming through the door, I can just replenish the bucket, if that makes sense, Like next fortnight, I'll just you know, cover what I took out of that bucket and it'll all be okay.

And how did that end up impacting your decision to move back in? Financially things weren't going well. Can you tell me a bit more about that? And I guess how that plays into your money story.

Yeah, of course.

So when I left that relationship, I moved into an apartment on my own, and I thought, okay, great, finally I'm not tied to that anymore. I can save I can have full autonomy of my money. And you know, I lived there for a year and I just found out very quickly that I was spending a lot of money to kind of instantly satisfy myself and that instant gratification, and that I actually wasn't saving very much at all,

But should I like?

That was the question, and so yeah, I had to chat with my parents and just decided that it'd be best if I, you know, move back home, have have a bit of time to settle and really reevaluate what I.

Want to do, what are my goals? Those big questions.

I love that.

Can you tell me a little bit more about what you do for work and how much money you earn? I know you dropped just before. I work in a bank, but I'm going to need more than that bad of course.

Of course.

So I'm a credit risk analyst for a bank and I earn about eighty two thousand plus a bonus once a year, and that's depending on performance.

Ooh, how good's that? What does a bonus often look like?

Is that like a thousand dollars or is it you know, more than that, or is it like fifty bucks and a gift card?

And you know, because they're different levels, my friend.

Fair fair, I'd say it's between one thousand to ten thousand pre tax before ooh, very.

Nass, just depending on performance of the company and your performance and stuff like that.

Yeah, yeah, exactly right.

How fun?

All right?

I want to Obviously you've moved back in with your parents to like re establish your goals and work out what you're actually going to do and what is important to you.

But do you have a big money goal? If so, what is it? What are we working towards?

Yeah, so probably in the short term paying for dental work that's expensive, so saving up for a lot of dental work that I've wanted to get done for ages and doing a bit of travel as well. But long term, we're still in the discovery phase of what I want to achieve.

So watch this space.

I love that dental work is honestly so expensive. Like I feel like people look at me and they go, Victoria, you wouldn't have needed significant dental work, but I did, and it cost literally tens of.

Thousands of dollars.

And I'm still looking in the mirror being like kind of same though, I don't know where we're going with this.

It's so expensive.

Is this something that's going to cost you two or ten or twenty grand? What are we saving up for here?

I'm estimating around seven at the moment.

Yeah, it's so expensive, and I don't know how much I'm going to get back on from like private health cover, but yeah, saving for that, it.

All adds up. All right, I've got heaps of questions. Let's go to a really quick break and on the flip side. I want to know about your investments. I want to know about debt. I want to know about best and worse money habits. Guys don't go anywhere. All right, money Diarist, we are back, and I am really enjoying this. I feel like I can really connect with you. Because the second you said I have an accountant as a

Don't worry, Dad, don't worry. I've got you.

So I want to know about invest If you grew up in the Barefoot investor household, you would know that. Scottie Pape loves a bit of an index fund. Are you investing, If so, what in If not, what are your thoughts.

I'm actually not currently investing at the moment, and it's probably for a reason that not many people would experience. With my job were actually considered privileged in terms of information. So if anyone doesn't really know what that means, it means that the information that I get to hear is quite influential in terms of the stock market. So anything that I invest in, if I invest in something a bit sus it could be considered inside trading, which is

That's absolutely fair.

I have had a couple of friends in that situation and I found that their favorite way of I won't say getting out of it, but just circumventing how complex that can be is going with an ETF or a managed fund or something where it's kind of the decision making process is out of your hands. It's not you going and buying individual shares. But if you want to have a coffee and a chat later and you want to tell me all of the top secreted information that

It might be the last coffee I have, Victoria.

I mean, maybe worth it for me. I kid, I kid, I want to know about debt. Now, tell me are you in debt? If so, what for?

And if not? Have you been in debt before?

Ah?

Yeah, I did have a car loan which I paid off about a year ago, so that was seven grand.

I was really happy when I did that. Such an accomplishment.

It feels good. Hey, the second you get rid of it, you're like, yes.

And I can finally appreciate my car.

Yeah. It doesn't feel like a debt when you get into it and you're like not feeling as though, oh this is lauding over me.

Yeah yeah.

But other than that, I just have my hex debt remaining, which is thirty two grand.

And is this because you grew up in a household where debt was not something that you took on or is this just you know it never came up or I want to know a bit more about I guess the decision making process because, as you said before, you were like, oh, I have you're acknowledging I have so many resources and I'm really privileged, and I feel like that's an epic position to be in. But I also have a sneaky feeling that means you knew about.

Debt before it could get you.

Yeah.

I mean I feel okay about debt, but in the right way. I know that if I had a credit card, I would spend all that money. I just know that about myself now. And I've seen others in my circle of influence who've you know, had access to debt, and really it just not end well for them. So I'm a little bit apprehensive when it comes to loans now. I really consider every option before going down the debt route, just because I've seen how bad it can get with some of my friends.

Yeah, it's crazy, all right.

I want to know, because I feel like you've given some pretty good money habits thus far. What do you think your best money habit is?

Oh, Yeah. My best money habit is I don't do cash.

You don't do cash.

I don't do cash.

And what happens is if I'm say, I shouted my mate of coffee and she hands me a five dollar note as you know payment, I won't use that five dollar note. I'll just put it in a little piggybank that I have at home, and I'll just cover the cost of that coffee.

And then what do you do with the money in a piggybank? Though, I need to know, there's so many questions, they're not answered.

It's just an im agency fun. It's just I let it sit there. If it gets to about five hundred dollars, I'll put it in the bank.

Oh how good.

Yeah?

And how often does that happen?

Like how often are you collecting cash that you refuse to spend?

I'd say like probably once a month.

I mean it comes and goes like Christmas time, when I have, say cash from the grandparents.

Yeah, that adds up quickly.

Yeah, exactly.

Or if I'm selling something on marketplace, you'll get handed cash and yeah, I just I don't use it and I'll cover the cost.

I love that.

I wish you could teach me that as a habit. I have this massive toxic trait where if someone hands me cash, I'm like, that's free money, that's free money. I don't have it, and if I spend it, my bank account does not go down. Twenty dollars on fish bowl. Yep, that's fine, it was free, that's absolutely fine. I'm shouting everybody coffees. Yeah, if I have cash, I will literally waste it. So if you give me cash, it's like

But I need to know yours. What is your worst money? Have it, my friend?

My toxic trait is definitely that instant gratification spending. Like I get so excited if I find one pair of pants, I have to buy three. It says a fifty percent off sale. I have to spend four hundred dollars. It's bad, but I'm getting better, and I at least can identify that it's bad spending, and now I'm slowly trying to reduce that.

I feel like I can really relate to you.

If there is something that I love, like you said before, a pair of pants and they come in other colors, I'll convince myself I need them even if I don't wear those colors. Oh yeah, I'll be like, these are the best pants in the entire world. Do you know what They'll be better in beije.

It's stunning. Oh my gosh, I love that so much.

I feel like I have learned a heap about you and what you've gone through, and I kind of love that you grew.

Up as a barefoot, invested kid.

But you're also like, I still am not sure what it is going on when it comes to money.

I want to know.

Now. At the start of this, you told me that you were a bee. You said I rate my money habits a B. But then I feel like you've just got this epic amount of self reflection and you've been able to put you know, you said you had an ego.

I have not picked up on that at all.

Maybe I think you're just deciding that you've got an ego, because if anyone in this conversation has an ego, Baby, it's me sorry, and there's not enough room in this

In the future.

And even though you're not super clear on what your big money goal is right now, I feel like whatever it is is going to be so much more achievable now because of the past work that you've done. Do you think, now having had this conversation, that you're a B when it comes to money?

I think maybe a B plus. I think you have inflated my ego, even if you're not picking up on it. Thank you very much. You're welcome.

You're welcome here ordering it.

Queen supporting queens. Thank you. Yeah, I think maybe a B plus.

Like I said, I still I'm in a very discovery phase of what I'm trying to achieve, and at least now that I have the breathing space to figure that out. The grade will go up. I definitely believe the grade will go up in the foreseeable future.

What steps do you think you would have to take to get to an A plus?

What would that actually look like?

Is that more around goal setting or is that more around I guess, actual financial change.

Yeah, I definitely want to unlearn my spending behaviors because right now it's still very much that instant gratification. So I'm in the process of unlearning that and learning to not get at that excitement of purchasing things and getting really excited for two seconds. So that definitely, and also having a long term savings goal. I have some short term ones, but having like smart long term goals.

Love all right, oh my gosh, Unfortunately that is all we have time for today, but money, Diarist. It has been an absolute pleasure getting to know you and learn a little bit more about your story. I feel like it might give some other people a lot of permission to maybe make similar decisions that put themselves in the best possible financial position, even if it means putting your ego aside for a moment. Yeah, definitely, thank you so much for coming on.

Thanks Victoria.

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