MONEY DIARIES: Jail, Debt & Learning to be Free

Hello, my name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yr

Let's get into it.

She's on the Money. She's on the Money. Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom. Welcome back to another one of our money diaries where we get to talk to one of our incredible She's on the Money community members all about their journey. Let's dive straight into it because we got an email this week and it went a little

Thank you.

What a wild journey.

Yeah, it's been a riot.

That has been a ride. Indeed, I cannot wait to hear more about it. First things first, though, I want to know what grade would you give your money habits. If I asked you to give yourself a grade from A through to F.

I would give myself a B plus.

I think, pow, Sam, All right, well, let's kick straight into it, money Diarist, I'm desperate. I need to know give us a little bit more information about your money story.

So yeah, like it said, I grew up in a wealthy family. I was pretty spoilt, got what I wanted. We'd go on holidays, all the time. And then yeah, when I was a teenager, I woke up one morning and it was a police officer waking me up telling me I had to go sit in our living room while our house was raided. And then from that day it was fourteen years until I saw my dad not behind bus anymore. So this was super shocking, obviously and

Yeah.

Wow, So it was going.

Through navigating getting money and going back into the workforce and raising kids alone.

Oh my god, what is it like having a house raided.

It's not nice.

I can't imagine it being nice. It's not the number one word that I would have used confronting, terrifying.

Maybe I wouldn't recommend it for anyone.

One out of ten. Can't recommend it.

Yeah, no, cannot.

I would say it's scary, Like even thinking about it now, I still get a bit icky thinking about it all these years later, and it's like, well, they treated us like we were criminals, even though we were like little kids and didn't know anything that was going on.

And yeah, they just make a whole lot of mess and leave it.

And then what happens, what happens when they leave, like you clean it up or you're not allowed to be there, or.

Yeah, we just had to clean up the mess. And whatever they took, they took. They seized a lot of assets, cars, houses, like all of that, and yeah, we're just clean up the mess after it actually happened.

More than once, so more than once.

Yeah, I've been woken up a few times by the boys.

Oh my gosh. So you're like, oh, wow, that's a five am knock on the door. Must be the coppers.

Yeah, not ideal. So wouldn't recommend.

Oh my gosh, No, that is literally the worst. And obviously you had no idea about what was going on, what was going on in the background. Obviously your dad did knew.

Yeah, so my dad had a side hustle, and he was just manufacturing drugs.

Really just a side hustle.

Well, that's we call it. He had his normal business.

Some of us go on dogwalks, some of us take our babysitting. Some of us Swedish manufactured drugs. One of these things will get your house rated.

It'll get your head fast, but then it'll take you real far back, real quick.

Yeah obviously, Oh my gosh, well that makes sense. Then if the house got raided, I was like, oh, well, where does this come from? Because it's not you know, his dog walking business gone awrye, that's not how these

Yeah.

So it was a huge shock and confronting for her obviously, and it took a long time for her to find her feet. So I guess it's like imagine having your lifelong partner just taken away from you, the person that kind of always relied on, and having not have worked for a long time, and then now having to go

So I did it to save the family home.

And that was like the worst thing, the worst decision I've ever made.

Why was that the worst decision you've ever made? What happened?

Well, because now it's like I don't have control, so there's a caveat that, like my mum and dad still own it and so I'm essentially I have their debt on my name.

And everything, Like I can't really.

Move forward like unless it gets sold, so like I can never get a first home buyer grants or anything like that. And now that I'm married, it's like a whole thing, like me and my husband can't get that because he has to go do that himself if he wants to get their first home buyer Wow. And then I'm always behind because I don't technically like I own it, but I don't technically own something.

Yeah, you don't actually get any of the benefits. You just have to hold all the debt for them.

Yeah, I just get the debt in the stress.

Yeah.

Great, that's a really good money outcome. What is the benefit to them for having their debt in your name apart from the fact that obviously, you know, the debt isn't lauding over them. Was it because they legally couldn't have it anymore or what there?

Yeah, so because the house was going to be repossessed and taken essentially taken off them because the mortgage wasn't getting paid, it's just kept the house within the family.

Yeah, which who cares?

Why don't you just sell it and get a new one. But that's that kind of generations holding onto the things that they put their bloods, fed and tears into. So yeah, that's the benefit. And then like eventually they want to be able to buy it back, but the credit history isn't the best, and then they obviously have to prove servicing and all that kind of stuff, Like they pay it, they pay the mortgage. But yeah, it's like all of that, it kept it their house. That's the only benefit.

Interesting. I am again super pervy because this is an anonymous money diary, So like I'm here to ask all the questions. You said, they so your mum and dad still together after all of this, Yes, yeah, oh my gosh, what a journey for them to go through. But do

I said, that's my husband so many times, and I just said, you know, if you go to jail, I'm not sticking by yourself.

You're like, I have seen this firsthand, and here's the outcome. I'm just giving it to you straight, would not recommend.

I'm not visiting you in jail for every week for fourteen years, Like.

Hell no, kudos to your mum though, that is apa. Yeah, all right, I want to talk a bit more about you. Now, What do you currently do for work? How much money do you earn?

So currently I'm in business development and I have an online coaching business as.

A side hustle.

Oh, very cool.

So for my full time role, I earn one hundred and ten thousand before.

Super Oh very nice.

Yeah, and my side hustle I make between like ten to thirty thousand a year, depending how much time and effort I put into it.

Wow, what kind of coaching business is that?

I'm an online PT?

Yeah, very cool? And how did you start that? How do you promote that? That's very fun?

Well I started, I became a PT and then did a whole bunch of extra courses on top of the personal training course because that really doesn't teach you anything. And then yeah, and then when I moved, I've decided I wanted to like move on to online. I decided that because other than the time factor, you get so much more bang for your buck if you have an

Yeah, makes sense, all right. I want to know what is currently your big money goal? What are you working towards?

So it was.

Until recently our wedding. So we managed to obviously pay up in cash.

How recent was that? When did you get married?

It was late last year?

Oh my gosh, so exciting.

Congratulations, thanks you, congratulations to you too.

Oh I love it. Tell me a bit more about your wedding. How did you budget for it? How did you work out how much you were going to spend?

Well, as you know, you think one thing and then you go into it, and it's a whole different ballgame.

It's a shock of your lifetime.

And even though I had known, like in my head, I've always said to people, like, weddings are so expensive. I know they are, and I used to hear people be like, oh, I would never spend more than twenty thousand dollars on a wedding, And now, like even before I got engaged, I was like, that's not realistic unless you're having a backyard or like really small wedding.

And I never wanted that, my husband didn't want that.

We went into it thinking, can know, forty five thousand, that's like, all right, that's a good sum. But we decided we would choose the top things that we wanted to spend money on. So like it was like photography, videography, food, entertainment, venue, and then everything else. I was like budget mode, like wild, but it's still just like there's so many, so many things that add up. So it was very quickly we're like, forty five thousand's not going to cut it, and then we're left, sixty.

Five thousand is not going to cut it.

No, So I think it was it was around eighty thousand dollars in the end, but it was perfect, like I wouldn't change a thing, and that was me like being so like, I'm so good with getting the cheapest steel.

I can completely sympathize. Our budget went from one thing to a completely different thing. And while we weren't I don't know how you feel about this, but we weren't mad about it because we knew we were getting what we wanted. And once we, you know, started talking about the budgets and what it would cost and the vendors, you go, Okay, I can see why this costs. This, we will pay for it. But I was still a bit salty. What was the number one thing that the price of it shocked you?

Florals?

Yes, Sam, Yes, flors It was wild. I was like, what, I did not believe that florals cost. And I get it, It's a lot of time, a lot of energy, a lot of effort. These things are expensive. But I genuinely believed. I was like, this will be our budget. That is so much money for flowers?

Double it, yeah, double it, triple it. It was wild.

Oh no.

And then because obviously all the floods that happened last year, the florals went up more because it was harder to get them. And then yeah, and I don't do things small.

I was like, I don't just have no FLORENX.

No, that's fair. No, I totally get that. And once you've gone that far, you're like, I haven't come this far to only come this far. Yeah, and it's a really negative mindset, like that is not a good thing. But at the same time, I can completely sympathize with brides who are like no, Like it was a week before the wedding and I decided to spend X on this, and I'm like, you know what, I get it now,

Yeah, And my husband kept saying like, cry once about the price, and will have the wedding of our dreams or you're going to regret cutting it, And I was like okay, and I'm like I had this picture of exactly what I wanted and he was the one like, cry once, and we'll pay for it, Like it's.

Fine, okay. So I thought my husband would be really budget about things and not see the value. And he was the one that was like, but what about we add this and what about this? And I'd be like, do you realize how much these things cost? Steven? Do you not realize?

Yeah?

Yeah, it's wild.

So it's surprising how involved the partner gets. Even though I thought that I would be planning one hundred percent of it, wasn't the case. Yeah.

No, my husband, I did everything, but he did have like decisions. I'm the doer. He just follows a lot.

Fair.

He complained that he had to write a speech because he's like I thought I just had to show up.

I was like, no, oh no, sir, no, But he did a great job. Yeah. Good. So and now you're off on a honeymoon. How did you decide when to do that, because obviously that's a couple of months after getting married. Was that strategic or purposeful?

It was because our wedding was so expensive, so we needed time to save for the honeymoon. We didn't include the honeymoon and our wedding funds. Yeah, so we've saved since the wedding. Are crazy to pay for the honeymoon because it's a long, longer honeymoon than the average person.

That's so exciting though, Yeah, yes.

So exciting.

And I had always said I wanted to go here for my honeymoon. So I'm doing it, and I'm paying for it, and you know, like weddings, travels doubled, so everything's dubby as it would have been four years ago. But I never regret spending money on experiences. It's just being able to say for it.

Obviously.

It doesn't make it hurt any less. Though. So when you get back from your honeymoon, what is going to be your money goal returning?

Returning, We're going to knuckle down and save for a deposit to buy a house.

That's exciting. That's so fun, all these big ticket items being ticked off. Let's hold it right there and go to a.

Really quick break.

I want to know next question, do you have any investments? If so, what are they?

Yes, so I obviously have my super which is at about fifty five thousand.

Dollars from memory.

That's very good.

Yeah.

I was actually surprised when we're doing our wills the other day.

That's solicitor okay, but like queen behavior, yes, we do wheels here.

I was like, we need to do our wills.

So yeah, and that's I was like, wow, I was shocked because I swear last time I checked it was.

Much lower than that.

And then we have about eight thousand dollar in like ETFs and shares and then a few thousand in crypto, which I just kind of leave that to ride.

Very fair, all right. And then debts. Obviously you've got this house debt. Do you have any other debts and what are they.

Other than that?

I currently have fifteen hundred left on a loan that is only about eight percent interest, which I will be paying off as soon as we get back from our honeymoon. And that loan was over thirty thousand from consolidating all of the credit card debt.

I was in, Oh my gosh, that's so close, Like that is so close to finishing it. What are you going to do when you've paid all off? I feel like it's always super anti climac diicts. So we've got a plan for ourselves to have an exciting time.

Yes, I don't know, maybe like go out from bougie dinner or something it's like.

We did you know, or a bottle of champagne or something like. There has to be something because when you submit your final debt repayment, they're like thank you, and then the window closes and you're like, whath that's it. There's no like streamers or balloons. No one locks on my door and says you're out of debt, Like what is this about?

Yeah?

Might buy some streamers that you popper and do it.

Yeah, yeah, one hundred percent. I am totally behind that. Please film it and say that to me because I get so excited. Money darist. I want to know what do you think your best money habit is?

My best money habit is I can get a bargain anywhere, and I make money work for me in every way I can. I'm not a stinge, but I'll always look for the best steal if the products the same.

Yeah, airpic and flipping that that's a very good money habit. But what is your worst money habit?

My worst money habit is I would say gift giving. Gifts is my love language, and I budget for it, but I don't think I budget enough. And because I've lived very close to my family and friends, I can't just do like kind of free things, so I often am sending them things like gifts or flowers or anything like that and buy them experiences.

And that's obviously not very cheap.

And I always think I'm only going to buy a few people, but I just randomly send people gifts to them up things like that.

That's really sweet though that's not the worst. That's so wholesome. I love it.

It's a good thing that I just see being more realistic, Like I need a bunch of thousands for that.

Yeah, Like instead of sending flowers, maybe like let's switch that out. Just a nice note or something occasionally.

That's true, a nice note. I never think of that.

But then I always come to writing the nice note and I'll be like, the nice note would look really good on a bunch of flowers.

Yeah, or like with a candle or something.

So I send it, yeah, one hundred percent. And you know what always gets me when you do the florest checkout, because gifting is my love language too, is the upsell. They're like, do you want to add the vase? Do you want to add the chocolates or the Teddy Bear or the whatever else? And you're like yes, And also I want to buy your gift card, even though you're going to give me a free one, like I always do that too. It's really bad.

Yeah, and like they even charge you for a card now, yeah.

What the heck is that? I just believe they should be absorbing that into the cost of the flowers instead of charging his fifty bucks charge me fifty five. I won't notice the difference and say that there's a free card like that way, I'm paying for it, but I don't feel like i'm paying for it.

Yeah, I agreed.

I feel like it'd be better for me mentally if it's just all one price.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. None of that helps my budget, but it does help me mentally, yes, mentally money. Doris, obviously you've come a long way, Like going through the situation you went through is insane, but unfortunately it's not an exclusive experience. This happens unfortunately every day to families around Australia. What would you say to baby you at fifteen, what would you say to her now to say, ah, it's actually going to be okay, because I'm assuming you were terrified at the time.

Yeah.

I was terrified at the time, especially because I was really close with my dad, so that was kind of losing him was like losing my best friend, even though he was obviously around in the house anymore, I would say, like, this is probably as horrible as it is, it's probably the best thing that's going to ever happen to you, because you're going to learn how to be so independent and not rely on anyone and just do everything on your own and pay for yourself and pay your own way,

Overcome everything.

Whereas some of them, my siblings that were older at the time, they had been spoon fed to the point that when they moved out, their rent was paid and they've never come out of that mindset. So for it to happen to me when I was younger, I'm so glad because, yeah, I've just gone out and done it all myself, and I have a thing where I'll always own my own money, and I don't want anyone to ever like have that over me.

I feel like this is a really good place for this conversation to lead because on the surface, like I don't mean to generalize, you are a very beautiful blonde

Yes, people look at me and like on any social media, but even people that meet me or like me and my husband, they think, oh, they've just got it lucky. They just earn lots of money, They just this, They just that. It's the same with fitness, when people look at someone with like a strong muscular body and they're like, oh, it must be easy for her, and it's like, well, no,

The buck ends with me.

Yeah, And I just I find it really interesting because I guess the more successful you are, the more you work towards things you know, the wedding, the house, you know, organizing all of this stuff. I think people just automatically start assuming that you must be privileged to achieve these things. But it's all about putting your head down and getting the work done and organizing it. And I mean, I've

I could do more like.

I just want mora and chairs and more consistently be investing in them.

That's the only thing.

All right, Well, I will let you have that, because I still think B plus is a pretty good grade. But oh my gosh, you are doing so well and I'm so proud of you, and it's just so interesting and a little bit pervy to hear from someone who's been through a circumstance like that. So I'm really grateful that you shared it. So thank you for coming on the show money Drest. It has been a pleasure.

Thank you very much, Thanks for having me.

All Right, guys, that is all we have time for today. We will see you on Wednesday. The advice shared on She's on the Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.

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