Hello, my name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yr
the Order Kerni Whoalbury and a waddery woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on a wondery country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through as this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow.
Let's get into it.
She's on the Money, She's on the Money.
Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom. Today is Friday, which means it is time to get together with the team and celebrate you our incredible She's on the Money community, And today we're going to be sharing a few of our favorite money wins or jesses, and then we're going to be helping to answer a juicy money dilemma, which this week is all about how to achieve your financial
goals with multiple income streams. And we're going to be unpacking something that you slid into our DMS, about which this week was what to do about a partner who spends his money on only fans but won't buy your baby clothes. So before we get their team, welcome to the Friday Show. Woo, thank you so much for having us party time. I feel like this has been a good week. We've had good pod content this week, good pod content, good pod content today. Good pod content, yes,
good pod content. But have you had a good pod content week?
Yeah?
I think so, And I feel like everything's brighter on a Friday.
Can you tell that we've been talking about scarcity mindset? We just recorded that episode and now she's like I were rose colored glasses. Victoria taught me how to be more abundant. I'm on basically, I'm onto you. What's the best part of your day today?
I got a coffee from seven to eleven money win, money win, instead of going to the cafe downstairs.
Money loss, money loss. It's a small business money so we've got to mix it up. Well, that's exactly right.
But I got my walk in going all the way to seven as amazing, So that was a highlight of my day so far.
That's pretty good. Jess what's the highlight of your day.
Oh, the highlight of my day is that this weekend I have a lot of fun things planned. We're going to see our family. My sister in law's very pregnant, right.
Yeah, which is babies everywhere.
We're all about the babies right now. And then one of my other friends has a baby, and I've just moved and we're really close to our friends where we used to be really far away from our friends. So I am excited to not have to drive ten billion miles to see them.
Yeah, No, that is epic. I'm just excited to go for a walk in the morning and get a coffee. If we're being brutally honest, like, this week has been so busy that I have done literally nothing that I wanted to do and everything that I didn't want to do. But let's move on to everything I do want to know about, and that is our community. Money wins, Jess, what have you pulled out for us this week?
I've got some fine ones this week, starting off with Samantha, who said money win. I've decided to move back in with my parents to save some money, and suddenly I have an extra four hundred dollars in my account for not paying rent for the next two weeks.
He kiss very good money.
We own that, queen. I saw someone else say something similar last week. They were saying they're embarrassed by Hi. Well, I think there's that stigma of like being of a certain age when your parents I're like, get that bag. That's a lot of money.
Yeah. Not only is it a lot of money, I also genuinely think it's a flex to have such a solid relationship with your parents that you're happy to move back in and they're happy with the circumstance like lap that up. That is privilege if ever. I've seen it, and I love it one thousand percent.
My next win this week comes from Page, who said big money win. I was paying seventy dollars a week for forty five I recently.
Gn't actually seventy dollars a week out.
Isn't that insane?
That's so expensive? That is ludicant that Sorry, at forty five, you're probably not going to sponsor us, but that is insane. They don't even have a room full of equipment, do they. Well, I walk past in her forty five place all the time. They're just like jumping up and down on the spot.
I could do that in my lundry for free.
Literally, let's do it anyway, Page seventy dollars.
She canceled her membership and signed up to her local gym for twelve dollars a week. To keep her fitness on track, she downloaded the Sweat app for a training program, which costs five dollars a week. This means that she's now going to save two hundred and twelve dollars a month. She's going to support a small business. She's gonna be able to work out more flexibly, and she's already gained some muscle on the new program.
Yes, Queen, I just said my kick Pilarate's workouts on the floor in my laundry with my cats climbing over me, and I just think that's it.
Pick Kick is the best. That platform is so so good.
That's because you use my log in Steph, Laura, you're listening, No, you did not.
That is a money win.
That is a money winner.
My next win comes from Jennifer, who said she recently bought a house that renovating and the backyard was all fake turf. She thought they were going to have to pay to get rid of it, but instead she put it on Facebook marketplace for free and had over fifty messages for people wanting to come and pick it up. And I have a story. Recently moved, as I told you, and we had like a whole garage full of stuff, right and I was.
Like, oh, no, I've just moved as well. The worst you would know.
A lot of it was really good stuff that I just as we were cleaning, I was don't want to move it. Op shops aren't taking stuff right now, aren't they? No. I think there's been a lot of donations, which is a great thing.
But though because I feel like sometimes people take the mickey and they just donate stuff that they really should have thrown out. Oh absolutely rude, which doesn't do it.
It takes up more time, it's not helpful all But anyways, aren't taking out? Do you want to throw it out? Because what do you do with good stuff? So I posted in like the page for my estate and hey, everybody, I've got a driveway full of stuff. It's out the front. I did preemptively say no holds first, distressed, don't message me, I'm not picking up. And it was gone in an hour. And a half.
Was that wow, like in your front room and just like.
What like crashed the cat And I was like, yeah, I would And I.
Wouldn't have even said hi. I would have just been snooping on people, being like, oh, so they're checking out the full pile. What do you reckon? They came for? Was it the keyboard?
Keyboard? We actually did have a keyboard.
I want to see the picture. No, this is all for free.
Yeah.
Well, because that was the thing is I was going to give it away, and rather than yah, I didn't have the time to sell it. I was just like, do a good thing. Maybe someone gets that's good.
I moved and I put a chest of drawers on my nature strip thinking that someone would take them. And they have it. And now my real estate agent is following me up to boot Hard Rubbish because otherwise it's going to come out of my bond. So money lost for me, money for you and our.
Community, and money in the page as well. The next win I have here came from Annie, who said she ordered some make up back in October and it got lost in transit. She got a replacement order that arrived in December. However, somehow the original order has now gotten unlost underrived, and they don't want it back. So now she's got double the makeup, including some of her staple products that she would have had to repurchase on every money win.
That's actually a very good money win. And it's like super ethical as well, because obviously there was a period of time between it. You didn't just like lie about your package being no, which we don't condone, but like, how good that's good karma coming around, I reckon.
I would like to think so as well. And then the last win that I have for this week comes from Rihanna and who said money win. I needed a new pair of shoes for work, as mine now have a hole where the toe pops out. Not exactly questionable.
That's hot, And one of the girls from work some people would pay.
For that only for content.
Think I would you would pay for that content? She would, It'd be great to see scumbag.
One of the girls from work said that she had a pair that she had worn once and didn't like the feel of them, so she said that I could have them for freeze. They don't go to waste, save myself one hundred and fifty bucks.
And I guarantee they're more comfortable than one with not on a hot day. True, that's like free air con exactly. Do you know what?
You know?
What's got good air conn in in a piece of footwear crocs?
True? No, great, great footwear. I'm team anti croc.
I am team that's very strong name and activity. I can't complete wearing my crocs.
Go to fashion Week?
Can Balenciaga brought out their own crocks?
And what happened to Balenciaga?
Yeah?
See myself out. All right, let's go to a break before I get canceled in the way the Balenciaga did, and we'll see you on the other side to talk about a money dilemma and also about what you would do if your partner's paying for only fans but refusing to buy baby clothes. Don't go anywhere.
Or right, everybody, we are back and it's time for what it is. I feel like one of my favorite parts of the week at.
This point, mine too.
Money dilemma. Let's have a listen, Hi, there, have you.
Got a money dilemma you just can't solve? The Sheese on the Money Team is here to help. Every week we tackle your dilemmas, both big and small to answer your most burning money, career and life questions. To get involved, simply head to our website and leave us a short voice recording and you might just find yourself on the show. Now, let's take a listen to this week's money dilemma.
Hello, I have a money dilemma that I hope you can pretty please help me out with. I work permanent part time, so I work four days a week, and I have a salary for that. I also work freelance and have different amounts of money coming in from that each month. I really want to use my freelance money to grow my wealth to also maybe subsidize my salary at times, because it's not always a lot with the
growing cost of life. So how can I kind of manage this freelance while living off my salary and grow my wealth and travel and do fun things that I can't afford to do just on my salary? Thank you.
I feel like this is a really common one for people who are either in that situation where they have an income and then they have a freelance income, or they have an inconsistent income in general, like they might be a UNI student only work casually, so you know, over Christmas, they might become fully loaded because they just work fifty hour weeks and then during the week they only have the capacity to do like five or six hours.
So I think this is actually there's no secret to it, and I'm sorry I don't have like some secret like, oh, here's how to manage your wealth and still go on holidays and do all of these things. It actually sounds like the first thing you need to do is go back to basics and work out what your goals and values are and go, well, what actually am I looking to achieve here? Because if travel is your value, well
what does that mean? Are we traveling down to the beach every weekend and it's a really cheap day trip, or are we traveling to Italy? And if we're doing that, is it an annual international trip? Is it every two years, every five years? Like what does that actually look like to you? Because to say, oh, I really want to travel and I want to create wealth and I want to I can't tell you the answer. You actually need to go back to basics and go, well, actually, what
are my values and what does that look like? And then you need to look at your budget and cash flow and go okay, cool, What does my actual budget look like like? What am my outgoings versus my ingoings? And as you said, it's hard to measure what that freelance work looks like, but easy to understand what your salary is because that's going to be the same thing each and every single month. So if I were you, I would get a good budget and cash flow system. Hint,
we have a brilliant one. I know, Jess swears by it so good, and I'm biased because I created it and Beck has just been gifted it, but she hasn't done anything with it yet. But that's okay, we'll get there baby steps. I mean, just having a log in as a is a start, But what I would be doing is really looking at, well, how much money do I have coming in and how much needs to go out? What are my basic spenses, and then with your freelance
income topping that up. So if say one month, you have an extra five hundred dollars, wow, we could allocate that towards achieving a goal sooner than we had set out to with our base income. And I think that the way of working needs to be quite structured, because otherwise we feel a little bit wishy washy, and we're like, oh, I'm not really sure what I'm doing when it comes to wealth creation or this holiday goal I have, or you know, you might be saving for a new car.
I think we actually need to create some structure. So create the structure with your base income where you have that stability, and then when you have additional funds coming in, maybe that goes into your holiday fund so you can go on a holiday sooner or achieve that goal quicker. Or maybe you have an extra two hundred dollars one month that you didn't have the month before, and wow, you could buy some more shares and work towards that goal.
But from my perspective, having clarity on those goals is really important to begin with, because otherwise it feels really wishy washy. And often when you have an unstable income, it can be like, oh, well, I don't know how much money I'll have next month versus this month, and what's the point. Well, why don't we just strip it back to basics and taking that a step further. If you're someone listening to this and you're like, but v I don't have a base income, it's always freelance. Sometimes
it's one thousand dollars a month. Sometimes it's ten thousand dollars a month. What I would do is look back on the last twelve months of income and go, Okay, what on average am I actually bringing in? What on average are my monthly expenses, and then creating a kitty and creating basically a cash hub where all of that money comes in, but you always have the consistency of
what goes out. So you might have worked out that your food, your fuel, and your fun is two hundred and fifty dollars a week, So regardless of whether ten thousand dollars or one thousand dollars came in that month, you transfer that two hundred and fifty dollars a week and live on a structure. And then maybe every three or six months you go into that cash hub and go, wow, I do have more than I expected to have, or wow, there's not enough there, or whatever that might look like.
And if you do have a surplus, you can reallocate that to your goals to achieve them quicker. But the most important thing, and I know I've harped on about this literally because I'm obsessed with budget and cash flow, is actually creating some level of stability, because that's what we crave when it comes to budget and when it comes to dealing with money, and often we feel most out of control when we don't feel like we're in control. Right, Yes, you freelance on the side and a bit of a
side husseler. How do you deal with that when it comes into your account? I kind of just treat it as extra free money.
Yeah, well not free money, it's not what's the word fungible? So aren't fungible is the most disgusting word. But yes, it's correct in this circumstance. You're looking at me confused. I don't.
I'd never heard fungible.
It makes me a mushrooms, that's what I thought. It sounds like fungus. Yes, I heard it on the podcast. I believe. Correct me if I'm wrong, Victoria. Fungible means you view it as replaceable. Yes, there, we so.
To give you the official definition, and it says fungible of a product or commodity replaceable by another identical item, mutually interchangeable. And then the quote is it is by no means the world's only fungible commodity, not a way I get to throw around it Honestly, I just can't write that word. It gives me the ick.
I love how Google definitions always use the most unrelatable sentence to so uptight to give you an example, and I.
Still maybe we should just go to Jess because she used it in a real life sentence, which honestly it should be banned. It gives me, well, I learned it in podcast.
But like I essentially I view it as like, I don't count on it being there, So when the money is there, I'll allocate it to something, but if it's not there, I'm not preemptively allocating it.
If that makes sense, That's fair because I think you can get ahead of yourself and then you know, maybe if it doesn't come in, you're stressed because you're not meeting the goal that you set or the bills that you've allocated for. And I think really working off the base amount of income that will come through is the best way to do.
That a thousand percent. Like, I just never count on it being there, and I also try not to fall into the trap of when a lot of money does come in, going oh my god, I'm rich, Like I can buy this really extensive bag that I wanted or I can put it, you know, I can go on a holiday straight away, like I try and pace myself a little bit.
Yeah, And I think that's the most important thing that you can do. And most freelancers actually go ham in their first year or two because they go, oh my gosh, this month, I'm rich, and I'm going to pay for dinner for everybody, and I'm gonna, you know, buy my family this a new couch, knew this and knew that. And then the month after that they're back to feeling a little bit frugal because they don't have a big
invoice coming in. And I do think that we should see when we have additional cash coming in as an opportunity to set ourselves up for a little bit more financial security. So if there's an extra thousand dollars in your account this month, how can we use that to put you in the best possible position. Can it go
into establishing an emergency fund. Can it top up an emergency fund, and it go into you know, sitting just in your cash hubs, so you have a bit more of a float to work with when it comes to bills. Because we have regro coming up in a couple of months, and we don't. Yeah, but we don't want to be surprised by those costs because, as you said, remind me, it's literally the worst when you have a thousand dollar expense come up and you don't have the money put aside.
And I promise if we put it aside, future you's got to thank you when that regro comes up, and you'll be like, heck, yeah, I don't even have to go into my savings for this one.
Don't have to change the response exactly like we're excited. V.
I did want to ask if say, for example, I had an extra five dollars this month, would you recommend I invest it or save it? Well, it depends what circumstance you're in, Like if you have a fully funded emergency fund that you're really comfortable with and no outstanding bills and no debts, then yeah, you could definitely invest it. But I think that having an emergency fund and having
bills up to date is actually really sexy. And as much as I think so many people are jumping or chomping at the bit, if that's the right word or phrase to use here to invest, I also think that we should be investing when we're financially secure enough to invest in that we don't have to pull it out
at a later date. So if you've got an extra five bucks, it's going to really depend on your circumstances, because an extra five dollars to one person might not mean much, but an extra five dollars to somebody else could mean the difference of being absolutely stressed and not. Because sometimes we have, as you said a couple of weeks ago on the show, I have negative seventeen dollars in my bank account, Like five bucks is a savior
when you need to buy some new Eggs. So I think it's really important to take the situation into account and not just go, oh, should I be investing this five bucks? No, not necessarily. I mean, if it's aligned to your values and the goals that you've set one thousand percent, what a cool thing to do. But if you don't have an emergency funder guarantee you you probably want that five bucks next month.
So because I do this is going to maybe kill you. But I have zero dollars in savings, so I'm going to start on my savings and then invest.
Okay, I e exactly, and I feel like getting ahead in that sense means that when you do invest, there's going to be less stress and less anxiety because you do have that emergency fund to fall back on. Like what if something happens and you do need an extra ten or fifteen bucks, Well, you've got it in your
emergency fund. We don't need to worry about the money that we invested because the plan with investing is actually to be in it for the long term, not put it in there for a little bit and then pull it out if we need it. It's put it in there for thirty years and hopefully don't touch it, which is an absolute privilege in itself, because that means that you're financially secure on the flip side, and I think that for me is the most important thing to structure
yourself for. And that's just genuine financial security to begin with. That makes a lot of sense.
And if you do want to do the master class, I feel like there's probably a lot of people listening to this right now going, oh, what is.
That she's some money? Never talks about it, We really don't, So like this is the year of pumping the budget and cashlow master class because we always forget to talk about.
It, and it is so great. I use it literally every single week. It's amazing. Hedge the website if you want to check it out. And because we love you and it is the season of love, it's almost Valentine's Day, you know, I love a theme. We're going to give you a cheeky discount code. So if you want to use the code, I love discounts, because we love you.
You're even making your own discount code up. I thought you were going to do the standard one that we turn on and off sometimes.
No, I love discounts. It's going to work out until February fourteenth, Valentine's Day.
Now do the fifteenth. What if it's like the day of self love and you're like buying yourself a Valentine's Day gift.
Valentine's Day goes all horribly wrong.
You need a budget casually musk class to hold you and keep you warm at night. Yeah, all right, running you a better job than your shitty ex boyfriend.
Honestly running until fifteenth. I love discounts. I give you fifty bucks off as little WE Love You Present TLDR.
It will not actually hold you and love you at night, but you know what it will do make you feel financially secure, so you probably sleep better at night, So turn out a ten idea.
I feel like it's a nice little segue into our next topic as well. Victoria speaking of something I love you at night.
Ah, No, it will not. This is spicy and will make you anxious. But we have a little community concern. One of you has slid into our DMS this week. Actually, to be honest, a lot of people have slid into our DMS this week. But I thought this was the spiciest topic, and we asked you guys what you would do. But first I want to hear what my team would do. So here's the dilemma. It goes, Hi, ladies, I have
a dilemma. Surprise. My partner has been paying for only fans throughout my pregnancy and when my baby was born. I caught him late December as I saw a transaction on his bank statement and he told me it was a once off because I couldn't have sex with him due to pregnancy. I was so upset, but he said he didn't even like it, so I forgave him. Fast forward. There have been more transactions, some totally more than one hundred and fifty dollars on subscriptions, but he won't even
buy clothes for our unborn daughter. I'm so upset. I have a high sex drive, so there's no issue there. I'm upset he prioritizes this over other financial things we actually need. Looking for some advice here and in the bracket, she says. I know you'll probably say, been him. Has anybody else in the community gone through this, Becky, your little face.
I do, obviously just want to make it known that I don't think there's anything wrong with only fans. I love only fans. There is nothing wrong with having you love it how much I love it, So I have several subscriptions. I don't I'm not rich enough. But I'm not rich enough.
That's why. I mean, if they're paying one hundred and fifty dollars a thing like is that a monthly fee? That's insane.
I see so much.
It's about that. My brain went that some girls make him bank off that and that kind of makes you low key proud of you, sis, But the situation, sorry.
Be no, well, yeah, I think that you know, there's absolutely nothing wrong with any of these circumstances.
Unless you have Unless you have a.
Pregnant partner and you're choosing to spend your money elsewhere. That's where it gets a little bit tricky, especially considering and I'm assuming by her tone maybe that she's not happy with him using or you know, gossuming that consuming that kind of content.
It sounds like such a boundary thing because, as you said, you feel like there's nothing wrong with that, and I'm there's probably people listening who would viewer as you.
Know, absolutely not that's cheating.
Yeah, Like it kind of really depends where you sit on that emotional scale. Some people love porn, some people are really against it. Like, we're not here to pass judgment on what people do organizing.
Yeah, absolutely not. And like I fully think that porn should be paid for anyway, because like that's one of the ways to guarantee that it's basically an ethical outcome, right, Like, so however you're consuming it, I think that paid is is great. But I think this concern, from my perspective, is not necessarily around whether he's paying for that service or not. Because we're not a relationships podcast, we're a
money podcast. So I'm assuming she's asked about a money dilemma, And I mean there's one the rules spots, so does go into the relationship side of things. But it's really, Hey, my partner has this spending problem, I would assume, and
it's impacting my everyday life. I feel like it would be similar to saying, oh, my partner has a gambling addiction and we can't afford children's clothes, or my partner has you know, maybe a drinking problem and just spending money on gin instead of on you know, baby clothes. Does that make sense? Like that's the way I'm seeing it, and it's being i guess prefaced in my mind because she's seeing it as a problem.
Yeah.
But yeah, again, as you said, no judgment if it's only fans, it's only fans.
Yeah, I guess, like hypothetically, if she didn't have a problem with him on only fans, then we're still looking at the issue of you're not spending your money on your unborn child, You're spending it somewhere else. So whatever that somewhere else is, that is still a bit of a thing that we need to be looking at. Yeah, but the actual what is actually spending the money on, of course, has its own complexities that they kind of need to work out maybe needs to.
Find out why he's doing that. I feel like there's gonna be some people listening to this and they're like, only fans isn't porn, Like it's different, Yes, And I totally get that, because I also think that I don't know. I don't know how much Steve's going to appreciate me talking about porn publicly, But I feel like porn to me is different to only fans. I mean, I've never subscribed to only fans, so I can't talk to the
experience of it. But in my head, that feels like a far more personal connection than you know, going on to like the World's Biggest Porn Stars website and paying for her content because it feels less personal like that to me feels like a boundary overstep. In addition, and obviously she didn't know about it, like she said, you know, yeah, I found a transaction and I'm unhappy with it, Like, do you think that's cheating? I feel like it would also really depend on who the only fans person was.
Is it like an only fans girl who has four hundred thousand followers, or is it like an only fans person who's a local mum that maybe is a mum that your other kid goes to school with, then she has three hundred follow Does that make sense? Like, I feel like there's such a delineation between how far removed is this person.
If they're close enough that you do know them personally, maybe or you.
Could off my rocker. Absolutely, that's a bit, you know.
But if they're so far removed that this person won't even ever know that you ever existed, then like whatever, like go ould.
I feel like the other important thing that we're kind of missing here is that she had set the boundary, like she had found it earlier on and said I'm displeased with this. I'm not okay with it. I can hear people yelling at us through the pod. He's pregnant, right, carrying your child? Fair enough? If maybe you hadn't had the conversation, you weren't on the same page. He's like, I thought it was fine. She's like, absolutely not. That's
something to be discussed between the two of you. But if she's set the boundary and he's done it, I feel like that's a real disrespectful thing for him to be doing to her, and then obvious the fact that it's impacting them financially. Is then an additional light, like you're going to pay some random girl, but you're not going to buy your baby something that it needs. That's where I kind of really have the issue is you're putting.
Your I have so many issues from this whole thing.
I know they're coming in everywhere. No, but it's like that is for me, the biggest problem is it sounds like maybe they don't have the most about any basic expensive you know, like that's such a tough time for you guys. And then for him to be funneling the money into something that I view is quite selfish in this situation, disrespecting the conversation that they had had previously, and to be doing all of that, well, she's just literally pushed a human out of her huha, like it's.
Just human quote Jessica twenty twenty three. Do you know what else really really frustrates me about this conversation? And I'm going to read it again. He told me it was one off because I couldn't have sex with him due to pregnancy.
That is gas lighting, sir.
What Like, my partner's going through the entirely dramatic process of being pregnant, But she couldn't have sex, so I had to resort to other things. Get in the bin. And I know, she said at the end in brackets, I know you'll probably say it in them. Yeah, I do say get in the bin, like you belong in twenty twenty two, sir, like twenty twenty three eight for you, because that is not the take that men should have. That like's so true. It is so primitive to be like, oh, men,
men need their sexual urges satisfied. Mate, No, no, sit down. That's actually gross. And I just think that that is one, as you said, Jess, disrespectful of the boundaries that had been set, but also like, whoa are you stuck in the stone age to think that that is something that in twenty twenty three women owe you. Yeah, she was pregnant, so she couldn't have sex with me. That's why I was naughty.
You can't get a free lease on life because your wife's pregnantly.
After her like, exactly true.
That's not a heart, that's not a hard whole pass for you to be like, Ah, she could, and you.
Know she couldn't. I need sort it out myself, and I did, and now she's mad at me, and I can't believe it, like, oh, disgusting, that is really disgusting. And he would have something to say about that. Clementine Ford, she would, she would. I want her opinion right here. I'm going I'm gonna call her. I'm calling her clem watch out. But honestly, I think this whole thing, I guess to sum it up, gives me the ick because, as you said, Jess, it's disrespecting the boundaries that were set.
And obviously there are other financial needs, like if it's one hundred and fifty bucks, that's a lot of money, and I mean, as we said before, might not be a lot to somebody, but might be heaps to somebody else. I think it's really important to really distill it down. It's not you know, let's put aside all of the misogynistic conversation. But I think to distill it down, this family has a budget and he is not allocating finances in line with their shared values and taking advantage of
that and then overstepping boundaries that were set. That's disrespectful and we need to deal with that.
What did the community have to say?
All right? So the community were as spicy in their commentary as we were someone said, the fact that he hid it is a red flag. Someone says that boy needs therapy. Stat I tried blind and optimism and I do not recommend. Someone else said, I think it might be a sign that there's something in the relationship he
needs that maybe isn't being met. And that response gives me the hebgbis because that is never the answer, like, oh, his needs weren't being met in the relationships, so he turns to only fans and you know, spending money, not on our bait. No, not a response. Someone else said not acceptable. Amen.
Good.
Someone said, pawn slash onlyfan addictions are a real thing. But the huge red flag is it being prioritized over other things for your baby. Maybe consider how you'll feel if this continues in one, two, five, or maybe even ten years. As a child with a dad who has a gambling addiction. It hurt our family for years and the impacts are internal and I'm still working through them today. So I think that's that's a good point. Someone else said,
he blatantly disrespected you and your child. I would not remain in a relationship with him. Someone else ash says no, full stop. Someone says, yep, I've been through this exact thing. I forgave him, but then found out much later he had a separate bank account for his only fans, and that was just the tip of the iceberg.
Oh my god, dying.
I know, if you could just DM me that that would be great. Someone said, binning is simplifying a situation that's actually quite complex. We need to understand what's driving it.
I feel like that's a fair thing going.
That's yeah, I think that's really adult, But like I'm not really adult, and if somebody is being treated like trash by somebody else, I'm very likely to be like, put them in the bin. You deserve better, my friend. The amount of red flag emojis that have been sent and the amount of times people have said boy bye, I think is that. But I think it's really interesting as well. And I mean to wrap it and just to remind people that we're not against only fans, we're
against the situation of dishonesty. Is someone said, genuinely, OnlyFans isn't a problem at all. The problem is that he's hiding it from you and disrespecting your wants. And I think that that's probably a really good place to leave it, because we could go on and on and on about it, and we're probably going to go on and on and
on about it once we stop recording. The other thing I want to put in here is like, obviously we've had I would hope a well rounded conversation here about this topic, but this isn't the court of public opinion, and I would actually suggest getting some professional help on this topic because I think that, as everybody else has been saying, there's something else that's underlying this, and whether that is disrespect or him not understanding, or something else
going on, I think some professional help, not just She's on the Money commenting on your relationship saying boy bye, is absolutely needed, and I think with that we can wrap the show. Guys, amensis Amen, all right? Well, as always, we'll see you next week. Guys, have a good weekend, by ye bye.
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