Friday feature - Q&A one night stands & orgasms!

Apologie production. How do you prioritize intimacy with your husband when you're so exhausted every single night? It just has to be a priority. I feel like intimacy is something that you just have to prioritize. And I feel like sometimes, you know, when you get out of bed in the morning, say when my alarm goes off at four thirty, it's hard to get out of bed.

Once I'm out of bed, I'm good.

Sometimes it's like sometimes I'm like I look at it and I'm like, I love you. I'm like my body wants you. I'm so keen. I was like, I'm feeling so tired, but watch you into it, Like, how are you like so glad we started.

It and like we were having a bad analogy. Yeah, I love that. I love that.

And we were having this conversation the other day about like board games and stuff sometimes to make things a bit fun. Yes, you know, like actually know we both got a board game. Yes, And honestly, like Kurt and I love it. We'll try to prioritize like once a month or once a few weeks to just like pull it out and do it.

Maybe nighttime sex isn't for you. Morning sex morning sex or like fast weekend sex. When Tyler goes like we both look at each other We're like, oh, yeah, well I should go get your iPad one hundred percent every single weekend. Like we're both like it's so good. Yeah, Oh I love this one. I'm curious to hear your answer. I think I'll know it anyway. But do you ever wish you played the field more before settling down with your partners because I've both been with them.

For so long.

Honestly, part of me is like I kind of wish I did go a little bit more wild.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, to be.

Completely honest, because we had six months apart when I turned eighteen, and that was the only time in my life that I've really like not been with him. Yes, But then again, in our relationship, we've experimented so much together over the years that we've kept it fun and exciting. So I feel like, rather than being with like multiple people, I really like how with our connection together we've like

Yeah, yeah, just to have done it.

Yeah, just because now I'm like I love him. I would never ever sacrifice that, and I'm so happy being with him, and also like our sex life is great, Like I'm so satisfied love that. But like there is a part of me that was like when I was younger, I wish I had kind of just like went for a little bit more like in about six months.

But I'm not that type of person. I would find someone I need a connection.

I just wasn't one of those girls that went to a nightclub and had a one night stand or just like passed a random Like I just never was like that.

He's like, maybe I should have.

Why didn't I just in align with you. Yeah, I definitely had about a year that I was single from my first partner to meeting Steve, but I'd never had a one night stand. But I remember I went out one night with my girlfriends and I was like determined to have one night stand because it's like this is my chances a single, Like it's gonna be like the movies who like met this guy like con up with them all night. I went back to his house when it came to doing it, and I was like, oh.

No, sorry, I backed down. I was just that connection I do and it just wanted me.

I was just doing it because I thought that was like what you do and that was the cool thing to do, but it really wasn't for me. And then when I met Steve and I was like, yeah, they can. Action is just so important to me. So I don't have any regrets because I don't think even if I was to be single now, it's just not who I am. But I'm similar to you, like open and just love experiencing things with Steve.

Trying new things, keeping it fun, keeping it hash.

Yeah, and I think all that stuff is so fun with someone that you deeply love and are connected with. Yeah, I don't think I would enjoy a one night stand with someone that I didn't have a connection with.

Because it's really funny. But I feel like I would find a herd to orgasm.

Your body comfortable and you want to feel like really confident, Like I feel like that's the best part. Yeah, in a way about sex, like Kurt and I let all our walls down, but I feel like it would take a while for me to actually feel your body.

They don't know what you love, like Steve is exactly what I love and vice versa.

So well, I've never had anyone else.

Maybe it's just too much of money to chake with k before this goes out, but I've never ever ever had anyone else make your orgasm besides skirt.

Yeah, that's been able to do it so with the other people I've been with. He will listened to this and.

Be like, yeah, literal, that so funny. What a good question that. I love that.

Thoughts on age gap relationships, Oh.

I mean, yeah, Steve and I have nine years apart. I always say, but age does not equal connection. No, we've never ever noticed our age gap. I can see people's reactions when I say we've got nine years apart. They're kind of like, oh wow, you know the judgments are flying out, even just with the energy. But we've never noticed.

Yeah.

So I think if you're connected to someone, it doesn't matter what they look like. It doesn't matter where they've come from, it doesn't matter their history, it doesn't matter.

How old they are.

Yeah, like that connection is just there and it has just been there. Love is love, Yeah, yeah love that do you ever get feelings of jealousy when your spouse hangs out with others.

Noah, he hangs out these friends actually a lot.

I think a lot when the people think people always like it's just because I don't share it. Yeah, but his friends are over all the time, and I love it. Like they come over for dinners. They come over like multiple times a week, like they love me as well. Yeah, like they'll all be having like a big chat that

Yeah yeah, I know.

And he like loves going like he loves having a drinker cup with the boys. Yeah, do all those things. But he's not very social for starters. Yeah, he's just like I don't know. We just kind of hang with each other on the weekends. But if he ever does go, No, it's.

A very social butterfly.

He loves like anything with anyone, Like his cup gets so filled by being around other people. The opposite, I need, Like I love being around people, but I need my me time to fill up.

Yeah, I'm definitely going more inwards now. I think after having Tala too, just like energy wise, like weekends might my recharge time. We just slow down, just be at home, like I don't know. Yeah, yeah, but no, if he does go to hang out with his friends, I don't get jealousy, but I get fomo like I miss him, Yeah, like I miss it.

It gets fomo when I go.

Yeah, sometimes, he said to me, sometimes gets a little bit jealous because he loves being around people.

Yeah, it's not because of me doing anything. It'scause he's like I just want to be around people.

Yes.

But then a lot of the time what we do is I'll be like, Okay, I'm gonna go hang out with my girlfriend night. He's like, sweet, I'm gona get my mate over.

Yeah, so you're like getting his friends over or whatever.

I do that when he goes out, and then we like ask a girlfriend to come over for dinner and we'll hang with the kids together or whatever.

Yes, how do you encourage more intimacy with your partner? He has a way lower sex drive than me.

Interesting, I think communication and chatting about it. I think some people do have lower sex drives though, but sometimes it can be like health related, stress related, So I would open up a conversation just to check in to see if it is any of that. Maybe it's a lack of attraction too, like over time that can happen and.

Even in themselves, like they might not feel really confident in themselves.

Yeah, yeah, spice things up, yeah, and maybe ask like what do you want?

Like what excites you? Like, what would you like if you could pick.

Like yours are you desiring? Like, yeah, is there that dark side of you that you've been feeling shame around that you want to explore, Like, let's open up that dark because we all have light and dark, yeah, utually in our sexual life, but there's just so much shamer and talking about it, like ask them, where is that? What's that dark sign? What does that look like for you? What does it feel like to you?

What could I do throughout the day to turn you on? You know, like maybe little justice throughout the day to like let him know what make him feel like keen by night?

Or Yeah.

It's just communication, is it? Because every relationship is going to be so different. In your partner, we could say things that might work for Stevel Kirk, but he's obviously completely Communication is just key.

Yeah, if you

Don't ask, you don't Know's so true, but yeah,