Welcome to she persisted I'm your host Sadie Saxton a 19 year old from the Bay Area studying psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. She persisted is the Teen Mental Health podcast made for teenagers by a team in each episode. I'll bring you authentic accessible and relatable conversations about every aspect of mental Wellness. You can expect evidence-based, Tina, proof resources, coping skills, including lots of DBT,
insights and education. In each piece of content, you consume, she persisted It offers you a safe space to feel validated and understood in your struggle. While encouraging you to take ownership of your journey and build your life worth living. So let's dive in this week on. She persisted, everybody is sharing something different. I guarantee there's something about you. That is extraordinary and unique and special and you just kind of need to see that. And I know sometimes that part
is hard. We tend to take who we are and what we're into for. Granted, we tend to downplay ourselves. I don't know why, but we do. That was specially when we're young and to leverage that. Hello, hello, and welcome back to. She persisted were doing quick intros because I'm supposed to go to Italy in two hours. Haven't packed need to do my nails recording this podcast intros. I'm a hot mess, but you are going to be listening to this while I'm on vacation. Today's episode is a really
phenomenal conversation. We're wrapping up the college mental health series, and we're talking about something that I think, cause, Has a lot of people stress, but if you do it right, it can really boost your mental health and your sense of identity and self-esteem and all the things which we talked about in this convo. So, Kate stone is back on the podcast and we are talking about writing your college essays. We're talking about crafting that story forming your identity
telling admissions readers. Whoever it is, that is on the receiving end of your essay, about everything you've done and created in those four years of high school and Beyond. So you're not familiar. K is an expert. Coach an admissions consultant and she has a background in youth mentorship, social emotional learning and creative writing. So she offers a really interesting perspective on this and she just provides so much Insight here on the nitty-gritty of, like, what is the difference
between each essay? How can you use each different section to get the most out of your application and also the larger questions of, how do I figure out what to write about? Who am I, how do I get to the point of being like, this is my story and this is how I want to tell it. So this is a phenomenal conversation and like I mentioned in this episode this is part 2 of Kate being on the podcast, the first episode, we talked all about motivation. So now that you're like I know what to do.
I got to write my essay but I got to motivate first go listen to that episode. It will be in the show notes and I hope you enjoyed this conversation. And it takes a little bit of the stress off of trying to figure out how to write your essay. So with that, let's dive in. Thank you so much for joining me on to you persisted.
I'm so excited to have you back for a second episode and to talk all things essay writing, oh my gosh, I'm so excited to be here and what's Hang on for you, the New York Times mention. I'm just really proud of what you're doing. It's so big and you deserve it. It's crazy. It was so funny I talked about on the podcast, but I didn't know that they had included it as a resource, someone emailed me and was like, there's a link that's wrong on your website.
And I was like, what? And they mention, I saw in the New York Times. So I guess I was going to check out the links and I was like, what are you talking about? And they sent me a photo and I was like, this is the craziest thing ever. So I spent like $50 in New York. Times website, ordering the newspaper myself to frame it. That's like my dad said it was so sweet for my birthday.
He did he like got really into, he Photoshopped it so said, New York Times Sunday opinion, and then he put the photo, he's like really into that kind of stuff. It was adorable. Oh my God. They must have been so proud of you. I like called they were skiing. I was like, He's guess what happened and they're like, oh okay, they were so confused but they're very excited. Yeah. That's like the best thing. The best feeling to be able to call your parents and celebrate the yeah. Yeah.
Up to this far to see that. It's like that actually, it was so cool. It was funny because a couple of months after my final paper for my actually was my found, it was our midterm paper, we had to write a opinion. Piece about teens and smartphone use in the footnote was on a In peace about teens and smartphone use and I was like, worlds are colliding. This is craziness, but it was, it was fun. It was a really great great moment for sure. Well, congrats, thank you.
Well to start this out there is so much that goes into applying to college before you get to the point of writing your essay and clicking submit. And I think that this is something every high schooler is aware of because it's very ingrained in our society like you can enter high school and everything. Is almost like your portfolio and your resume leading up to this moment of applying to college can be very overwhelming. There's a lot of pressure there for sure.
And so putting that disclaimer out there that everyone has a different path and that even if things aren't going well and you don't know what you're into and you haven't found your passions early on in high school or late in high school. Things work out, one hundred percent of the time. Things work out things are meant to be the way they're happening. If things don't work out with college admissions or the school, you want to go. Wasn't meant to work out.
And so, with that context, I would love to get your thoughts on how to distribute your time, and set yourself up for Success, when you are crafting, that narrative but also giving the context that like, this is not an a, let's make this as planned out, put a ton of pressure. Here you have to do it this way, but also for people that do like to plan and be aware of what's coming up in the future and, and sticking to these interest.
So what are your thoughts there with that rambling of all these different ideas? Yeah. Well, I'm gonna give you two answers. And the first answer is for those students, who feel like, well, there's something special about me. I'm not good at anything, you know. I don't have any special talents or skills or interests. My answer to you, is that the one thing you could begin to explore is your love and curiosity for learning,
whatever. That might be, and it doesn't have to be academic, it can be creative. It can be Interpersonal in a relational, it can be a podcast, you just got into like Sadie's where you just like gobbling up all the episodes and learning as much as you can, obviously you're not going to have this complete resume when you're 14 15, 16 or even 17 or 18 years old, that's not a prerequisite for applying to college. Okay?
The one prerequisite is a love of learning a curiosity, a desired to I understand things and get to deeper levels and insights on different subjects. It could be anything, it could be like your love of fantasy books, you know, it just it doesn't matter what it is, just that you give yourself over to that Curiosity, okay? That's like, that's my answer for those students, who feel like, well, I'm not good at anything. I'm not interested in anything I have. First of all, that's probably
completely untrue. And there's like, and if you were, if Like five minutes with you. I could, yeah. I'm like 20 things that you're really good at that. You love that, you know, a lot about. There's an exercise, I like to use and it's called the. I love the I know and it's like just do that with yourself. Do one minute of all the things you love and it could it's all like Association. So don't think about it. Don't try to figure out. What should we do it? Yeah, yeah.
Okay, yeah. Do you want to alternate and like one of us does? I love? And one of us does I know? Yeah, so okay, perfect. We'll do a very brief. A diversion will do like 10 items that everyone's with me doing podcast. I got the charm dot. Okay, I love my dogs. Like, anytime I see my breed of dog on the street, up stopping them. I'm going to pet them, I'm
asking all the questions. I actually think about this question a lot because I feel like I really read them interested, I go far and then have no obligation to real life. I really love doing hard gel DIY, Russian manicures. And I have like my whole setup, little gel lamp, my little nail drill every week, it's a whole thing. Love that. Not gonna get me a job but absolutely adore it. I love podcasting, I love graphic design and social media marketing.
I really enjoy video editing, kind of putting together these like highlight moments from these really impactful and Powerful conversations, loved traveling and seeing new places, the list could go on there so many different things, but exactly like you said, even if you do have these interests, that have nothing to do with, what you think you want to do in life, it just does. So Oh, these larger scales. I just learned like 10 different things about you, and some of
them I didn't know about you. They showed me not just your business side but you're just playful silly expressionist side. So that's the point, right? The point is to share in a way that's unfiltered and unguarded so that people feel like, they understand and know you a little bit better. So the purpose of that is to is to reveal like your passion your excitement, right. The I know is Maybe I'll do it and then we'll see you come up with. I know a lot about growing wild
flower gardens. I know a lot about permaculture. I know a lot about content creation. I know a lot about Instagram, marketing. I know a lot about building business. I know a lot about hiring and training employees. I know a lot about relationships.
I know a lot about motivation. So all these places are going in all these different directions of things that you might know a little bit about it, you might know a lot about it, it doesn't Either the point is to get things down so that you can begin to follow these threads because all these are like clues that you get to follow and pursue and see how far and how deep you can take them right now.
I was cold enough that I think that's its key and just like when you were listing your mind you're like I know so many different things. I feel the exact same way and I think it's something that I find in my own life where it's like you are. So laser focused on your own journey in your own experience. That you forget that Everyone else around, you has none of that context if your interest in your insights and your knowledge and your passions.
Like no one knows any of that. And so for college applications, especially you have to go above and beyond to like scream, those interests cream those passions because it's not going to come through and that one extracurricular, you listed and like the bottom of your interest list. Because again, all these different people are sharing all these different parts of their lives. Well, you touched on something is to get all this stuff out. Get that content out. Onto paper through the.
I love the. I know exercise as soon as possible because what you're going to learn about yourself it's kind of a boost. You actually you're going to feel like when we start to uncover parts of ourselves through these very simple exercises, we start to go. Well I do have something to offer. I do have something to contribute.
I am unique. I I have value to bring to a conversation to relationship to a college campus and it's so that's that's Multi-layered nature of learning about yourself is that you don't just, you're not just doing this to get an outcome, but you're doing this to go on a journey with yourself that will guide you and Lead You based on the excitement of Discovery. Do you know what I mean?
I completely agree. I found being able to like establish a narrative and organize all of these experiences to be one of the most empowering things because it's it's tough to explain everything you've done in your entire life, especially when you're so young but Being like, these are my interest. Here's where I hope to go, it might change. But this is what I have to offer. Really was such a boost of confidence and self-esteem and is carried through as I continue
to pursue these interest. So even if you're looking at this process is like, oh, I hope to get into the school or get this score. There's so much self-discovery that takes place, and has such positive impacts on your mental health. If you're doing it, right, and the sense of like, really asking these questions. Yeah, that is the whenever I'm learning about Myself. I just feel this like self-love come through and actually hope I
feel hope I am generating. Hope about my future about what's coming for me about what I'm going to get to do. What you're doing through this process of brainstorming is really calling your future self into the present moment and watering the seeds of who you will become. I love that. It's so true and you're able to see your own potential. Like you're trying to show other
people that you have potential. All but in the process you're able to see it for yourself which again so empowering such a confidence boost and so much hope for what's to come in the next four years. I want to say one more thing. My second answer for those students who are like, yeah, I get that. And how do we prepare? Yeah, so it's like me. So, for you listener. Dear listener, what you want to do is recognize that colleges
are looking for evidence. Of your academic preparation in pursuit of the major, you're thinking of applying for. So they're looking for academic, preparation evidence. So it's totally fine. If you have like multiple interests, as long as you've explored those interests with, at least a couple layers deep. Whether what podcasts like, yeah, if you're interested, I think one of the easiest ones is like pre-med. I've been so many people that are like, I want to do pre-med there.
So many different directions there, but in high, A school. What does that look like? Whether it's an extracurricular, class, you're taking those those different routes you can do to demonstrate that interest. Well, number one, you want to look at what resources you have available in your school. So admissions are going to know what you have available, and they're going to look at how you've taken advantage of the academic resources available to you. Like, have you fallen short on that?
Have you kind of gotten a little complacent? And like, I'll just do just this level class. I won't push myself for this. Her deeper subject study clubs. Yes! Extracurriculars, have you initiated something? Did he start something to do? You get people together to work towards a common goal on an idea? You have did you read books on it? Did you watch documentaries? Did you listen to 20 podcasts on subjects to get a different idea? Did you read academic articles?
Scientific articles, did you look at the industry and what's new in the industry? What's happening like things are changing, so fast, especially with the integration of a, I know. Now, look at the industries, you're into and look at what's changing because we are going through a massive rapid change. And if you understand the Leading Edge of what you're interested in, you're going to be able to write about it and talk about it in a really smart
way and really coherent way. And then honestly there's just so much available to you on the internet admissions officers recognized when students are taking advantage of that and it's not like oh like I don't know what a Google search. Well look you will be I available to you. Yeah. If you want to study something you can literally go what are like the top. Five resources, chechi booty, or whatever.
There's like a few out now of like, how I could pursue this to get varied understanding of the subject quickly. You can learn so much very, very quickly. And again, there that Curiosity the desire2learn, it's really. If there is like if there's like two things that are so important on a college application, it's the desire to learn and curiosity like that is mmm. The creme de La Creme of what they're looking for and it sort of comes.
It's like, you don't even have to necessarily Ali force that impression. It will come across based on your actions, your titties, your how you talk about your interest, the questions you have and that you present in your writing and then the second piece is your distance traveled. Right. They want to know where you've come from, who you are now. That's such an important piece and we'll talk about the personal statement, but that's such an important piece and theme for the personal
statement. I cannot convey that more deeply. You really want to show the growth. There's two things that you mentioned there. One thing that came to mind. Remember the year I think it was when I was applying or when I was about to apply. I remember there was this one kid that got into Harvard because he was really into some
kind of like software coding. But he was the one that created that map where you could track all the covid outbreaks as they occurred and he was taking all this information from like new sites in public governments and putting it into like a really user-friendly map that anyone could go online and look at and see the data and I remember is like a huge article headline came out and I was like that's so interesting. This Exactly what you talked about where you have an interest
in someplace. You are paying attention to what to the Forefront of your field or your area of Interest, how
can you apply it? And use the internet and all these different new skills and tools to your advantage and I thought that was such like a fun and interesting way to do that and work that Harvard. I mean, that is so cool because again, what I always suggest first things you're like, well, I couldn't come up with an idea like that if there's anybody out there was like, well, you know, that's like a really genius ideas like, well, you have to This coming up with ideas.
Yeah. But is there somebody in your life? Ask yourself this. It's my fiance, we are coming up with ideas all day long. I'm not kidding you. We literally call him, like, every hour we're also on business together and we are coming up with ideas. None, stop. And it's the most exciting relationship in my life. Because it's so Dynamic. So, ask yourself. Do I have an ideas person in my life? That's just helping me come up with ideas. Crazy idea, spontaneous ideas, bad ideas.
And and again do research like use AI. Where does this interest in this interest? Overlapping connect? The other thing that you mentioned, which I think is a very almost like, controversial and like conversation, everyone wants to weigh in with the idea of participating in existing organizations clubs classes, Etc. Versus starting your own thing and building something from scratch. And I've heard people give their two cents, all over the internet all over, take tag all these articles.
Reverencing you have to start somewhere. I think no one wants to like have you been a leadership position to something that's already existing? What are your thoughts there for students that are hearing all of these narratives and are unsure where to put their eggs in which baskets? Oh boy I think that's just so it's getting so myopic you know. And like so many people that
work in admissions. Yeah, let me tell you, I don't know for sure, but let me tell you well look, I mean it doesn't matter where you're putting your energy, are you just showing out there to get a check mark and it Goldstar and your activities list or are you showing up there actually to have an impact to solve conflicts, and disagreements, to move progress, forward to have an impact to bring forth new ideas.
Like, that's all that matters. It does not matter the context in which you're doing it. All that matters is that you are taking initiative and bringing value to the place where you're devoting, some of your energy and time each week or each day. Yeah, I'd love that. I truly do think that that's one of the biggest takeaways I had, which was that?
It is those small moments on a day-to-day basis or on a weekly basis that build up over time and then you have this final project, it wasn't necessarily like I did this test and it changed my life. Or I went on this. This I had this one conversation and my entire worldview is shifted. It was like every week I'm sitting there, I'm editing a podcast and every week I'm like posting this little tiny Instagram story that a couple
people will see. But that led to this really in my Worldview. I was like this is something I'm really proud of and this is where I feel really passionate and driven in this area. And so I completely agree with you there that like the daily weekly monthly Investments. Add up over time and can have a huge return on investment. Oh my gosh that is so on the nose of something I want to mention now which is for students who are like well I don't know where to start with having a big impact.
Yeah, this is something I heard the other day that had such an impact on me. Because the people who are really ambitious and the people who really execute and get stuff done, it's not in having those big brakes or having those huge impacts all at once. It's literally in the discipline, the commitment and the accountability of showing up for those small remedial sometimes annoying. Some usually very boring tasks, you know, and those are not to be dismissed. Those are important, you're
keeping something moving. You're communicating, you're keeping goals. On track that is actually what creates that big impact is the small things that you show up for consistently and regularly and if you're like, I'm not motivated. I don't know how to do that. You should listen to our other episode because we talked about exactly how to problem-solve there and make that consistency happen. I've got my book coming out soon. By the way, oh my gosh. Okay. I'll put your website in the
show notes. People can do that. I'll put the episode, everyone can check it out and and consume all the content because I think a lot What we're discussing the first question that would come to my mind is, okay, great, but how do I do that? And then the concept of motivation and discipline comes to mind. And so I think these conversations go hand-in-hand and they're very interconnected and so it makes 100% sense.
Why you are an expert in both of these areas because they are so interconnected because it's being able to be motivated to pursue these goals and execute and then craft a narrative around them and be able to share that with other individuals, which can be such a scale. So for Listeners who are like, okay, I did the brainstorming, I figured out what my interests are. I've been like taking little notes about what I'm passionate about, how I'm spending my time. What is the next step? Okay.
Well first, you have to come to my free Workshop because that's going to get you ready. I take you through the whole process of how to turn your brain storming into structure. So, join my free workshops. We have one coming up, July 29th. And then again, in August, I expect to see you all at every single one of Kate's workshops.
Yeah, it's like what's better than Sending once attending twice or three times because we get something new out of it every single time, but I'm going to have a lot of free stuff coming up. You got to come and learn from someone who knows what they're doing. That's the first step I wouldn't recommend like trying to figure out how to do this on your own, because all it takes is that free workshop for you to be like, okay, I get it.
I understand what it's supposed to look like, I understand what the purpose of the personal statement supposed to be. I understand how I can connect these different ideas through a clear topic or theme. And now I'm ready to go, right? An outline write a draft and remember that first draft that you write expected to be a bad first draft. I mean, really, just like allow yourself to just write without trying to make it some finished polished piece.
What you're going to do is you're going to say, oh, what's working and what's not working, and you're going to grab what's working, and you're going to re outline restructure it, and then write it again. Because, honestly, with students who try to revise from a first draft, it just takes so much longer. Then being like, Okay, I wrote about first draft awesome but worked, how could I restructure
this around? Something that's going to help me communicate different sides of myself and is also more coherent in terms of a theme, right? Yeah, yeah. And then you just write it again. I love what you just mentioned there. You can learn from someone. And when you are navigating, this college application process, because so many students are going in blind, like maybe if you're lucky, your English teacher will offer to revise it or they'll offer to have that as an assignment
during your semester. But for the most part, so, Any students are just expected to know exactly how to write a personal statement and write a supplemental essay and manage. The workflow of writing 17 different assays in six months. Oh yeah. I mean when it has a 17 year old ever had to write an essay like this at all, like typically they have English class and English classes. Like here's the final paragraph, academic essay, and let's focus on thesis statement and topic sentences.
And it's not even it's tedious and it's not Have really at all. And this is about creativity. Like you can write a one-sentence paragraph As a transitionary statement. You can break the rules, you can do things that are like Edgar Allan Poe ishino, you can do all sorts of stuff Break. The Rules break the rules, and it's so hard because you've been sort of trained and primed to like follow the instructions and like right in a very specific way.
And unfortunately, that's like to most students detriment in this process because This process, you kind of need to let go and go deep within yourself and make it more about journaling, you know. Right. Like conversational what's what really matters to you?
Who really are you? So you can bridge that connection with your reader so that they feel like they get you and this is really important because what you're really trying to do with all of your essays is to get admissions in your corner so that they can be like oh I get the who this tune is there like an inventor Sage you know? And right over to admissions, the emissions were be like, hey, you gotta look at this kid. They fit into this, this Niche
perfectly. So you're really trying to do three things to get them in your corner, you to make an emotional connection to your reader by first making an emotional connection to yourself. So, you have to be invested in this process. If you wanted someone who's reading it to be invested in it to, right? And you just do that with sincerity forthrightness about your vulnerabilities and you're like the places where you're weak in the places where you're strong.
This is not like, look how great I am. This is actually, this is who I am Works in all here, and beauty and all and then finding your stories theme. The the distance traveled theme, you know, I'm looking at active nouns, are you an inventor, are you a catalyst or you initiator? Are you a performer? Are you a, you know, a wise old sage. Who are you? What roles do you play? What identities do you?
Hold it makes it easy for them to advocate for you because they can clearly communicate it to somebody else, right? It's like writing good marketing copy. It's just easy. You get it, you don't Try too hard to understand it and then the third one is understanding who you are in the context of the academic roster in admissions, right? Like what Niche am I filling in the school because that's really what they're trying to do.
It's like casting a class? Yeah, you know, for individuals that don't have older siblings or aren't tapped into this, this community. What are some of those niches they're like, okay, I need to be part of a niche. But if we were all the same age, we're all coming from high school, a lot of us have played sports or whatever it is. What are these needles that you're thinking about? About when you're working with high school students? Well it might be a combination, right?
Like you might be interim otix but also technology and Community Connection. Like you want to look at productive tensions, you have between your extracurriculars, your personal side and your academic side. You want to look at where these things overlap a niche. It doesn't have to be like I'm the doctor girl. Like that's, you know, and it could be more complex and more nuanced than that. And honestly you want it to be because you are more nuanced. Test and it comes back to
recognizing. Like, when I take my students through, let's say a different types of exercises and I have them throw their answers and the chat like their top answers for this exercise with that exercise. They realize everybody is something different. Everybody is sharing something different. I guarantee there's something about you. That is extraordinary and unique and special and you just kind of need to see that. And I know sometimes that part
is hard. We tend to take who we are and what we're into for granted Downplay ourselves. I don't know why, but we do that, especially when we're young and to leverage that because in your life are always going to have to leverage your skills in the marketplace and you're going to like, at some point, you're going to have to learn how to do this. So, start practicing with it.
Now, you know, about the niches could be, the niches are generally speaking academic, but they always overlap with how you're going to contribute to the community and the culture. So they're looking for academic, personal cultural fit. Fit with the school. Those are the three things that looking at and the niches are unlimited, you know, and their endless and you can just make them up. You love that. You know, I think that's key and I think it gives a lot of comfort and peace.
If you apply to a school and it doesn't end up being a Fed. Are you don't end up getting in like when I think about pain, now being there on the side, other side of things I was like, okay. But I was applying to the College of Arts and Sciences, people are applying to the engineering school pure playing to the business school.
People are applying to the nursing school and so it's like They can't have more individuals in the nursing school than the capacity allows like they're not going to throw them in the College of Arts and Sciences school. It's the same thing with these niches like if you have 300, people who love robotic not going to have a very diverse class. And so he thinking about it from that perspective, that again, it's not necessarily a reflection of you not being good enough for the school or not
writing your essay, right? It's just that it's in a lot of ways like a numbers game and a very different experience. Experience that it feels like as a high schooler when you're saying I'm putting all these best parts of myself to let someone else judge and then they're making a decision that's going to impact the rest of my life. Like that can be very overwhelming. Well, let me just tell you right now. That right now is not going to determine the rest of your life.
Yeah. Like college does not determine the rest of your life and there's a great Malcolm Gladwell talk where he addresses there is a bottom, 50% of Harvard academic class, okay. But those That bottom 50% is still the top 50 percent of those students in like lower quote-unquote, lower tier schools, right?
And oftentimes those students who are in the lower half at Harvard because they compare themselves so much to their peers that they tend not to publish, even anywhere close to the top half because they don't feel good enough. And they are comparing themselves to to their peers and so they don't even try so so it's a really it's a very very interesting YouTube. You should actually go listen to it. It's called why I said yes to
this. And it's like talking about why we say yes to Elite institutions and it'll eat only experiences. When actually the psychology and the data show that we can do much better in pools where it's not as competitive, but we can shine, we can actually shine bigger. Yeah, I'm going to watch that after that sounds so fascinating. So we talked about what your goal is with your application, which is young people in. Corner and follow. Those three steps.
If you were to explain to individuals who haven't written a supplemental, a say, haven't written their personal statement, what your goal is and what your frame of thought should be for writing those different assays. How would you explain that to someone who's coming in blind is like, I'm looking at the comment out for the first time. I don't know what the my aim is for each of these asses. Okay. So this is where spreadsheets are really, really great. And I have a really great essay
tracker for this. I might actually send it. It to you to keep track of it because it'll help you keep track of your different topics and making sure you're not overlapping or repeating information in your essays. You do want to be cautious about, it is important but your personal statement is supposed to be personal, right? It's supposed to be much, much more personal. It's not supposed to be like an every citation of your
activities list. It's not supposed to be a recent Tatian of your accomplishments, it should have that element of. Like, I get this, I get the heart and vulnerability and I understand. This person is on the soul level on the feeling level, the extracurriculars, are you really have to read those prompts carefully? Because a lot of students don't understand what the problem is actually asking, or they're not complete completing the prompt in terms of like answering all the questions.
It's asking but extracurricular essays, that's one topic or they just really usually generally want to know what type of impact you've had, how you've contributed to that Community or that experience. Or a challenge you experienced or what you learned, they're trying to understand different sides of you, you know, how would you operate in this situation? So how did you help your
community in the situation? So you want to make sure that you have different topics for different prompts or if you don't have enough extra curriculars, which I get it because some of you totally missed out on early high school and, you know, just the challenges of not being in person, you just didn't get opportunities to do enough. Ours. Then what you have to do is you have to talk about your extracurriculars, or your topics in different ways from different angles.
So that's where brainstorming the content. Like, here's what I did here are the problems I saw. Here's the impact. I have I had a, here's what I learned. Here's the lessons I gathered. Here's how it changed me. So you just want to get as much content as you can so you can begin to determine. Okay. This is going to go here. That's going to go here and go deep. You're going to have to actually get more specific. And a lot deeper with your content if you have less stuff
to write about, right? This is a very subjective question, but I'm wondering if you ever work with students in your like, you're putting too much time into this, like, they're just like beating themselves up over making it. Absolutely perfect. And then the flip side, like, starting it a day before, like there has to be a happy medium of iterating, improving your essays and then being like it's no longer effective to keep looking at the same piece of paper and try To make it perfect.
So what are your thoughts there with timeline and knowing when to wrap up the process? Well, it depends on how many schools you're applying to. But if you're applying like 10 schools, if you start now at minimum is about 24 hours a week and that's drafting revising and researching. Because in some cases, maybe there are things that you've experienced that you haven't adequately analyzed, or evaluated for the value, you've gained from them. And that's what this process is is Airing out.
What did I actually learned? Yeah, you know like I've been doing doing doing now. I have to stop and reflect so sometimes it takes a little bit of time to do some research and understand the subject from multiple angles. So that you actually have something to say about some of these things and it's okay if you don't have something to say right now, it can take a little exploration to figure that out.
If I have a student that's just pouring over like Ford five hours a night that's too much that's way too much go with imperfect and that's If you're working with somebody like me, that's what I'm here for. I'm here to take what you did and move it along Faster by up, leveling it with you. My showing you exactly the points to address and up level without, like losing your mind over word choice. Like, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Now you're making it too, complicated.
You worried about syntax where you don't really need to be worried about syntax, the first version was fine and that's not going to be the thing that shifts it. The thing that shifts it is, The specificity and the insights how you answer. Like here's how this contributed to my growth and development. This is what I came away with this is what I learned and these are the questions I'm left with what is your advice on who you take feedback from and how many
people you let read your essay? Because I know that was something in my experience which I it was very intentional. I was like okay my parents have like had a front-row seat to this whole experience. They've been with me through three high schools. We're seeing it to my English teacher who I'd known for one semester. She was like, I don't really get it, we will, of course you don't get it because you don't know me.
I know that a lot of students give their essay to their English teacher because I often get to see those notes. And a lot of the time, the notes that they give like 20% are good and then the other portion aren't going to make necessarily A Difference. You know, a lot of people are going to have a lot of feedback for you. Someone's gonna be like, no change this, and start this at the beginning instead of this way. Drill, start over. It's terrible.
I literally had a student this past year. Who's the English teacher was like, I think you should start over again and I was like, that's not constructive. How is that constructive? Like you have no idea how long this student we have exhausted, so many different options. And this is what we've been working on for two months. And if they say that to, you ask them give context. Look, I've been working on this for six weeks. Can you please give me constructive feedback?
You know, not just criticism constructive. And you really, I mean I want to be sincere when I say this, but you really want to ask somebody who knows something about college essays. Like, is there somebody who knows something about college essays in your life, if not trying to find them? Because that's what happens.
A lot is that people end up giving feedback that's actually the antithesis of what the purpose of the statement supposed to be doing, like, what purpose, it's actually supposed to be serving. Do you know what I mean? And the feedback sort of irrelevant. It's like, yeah, everybody look, you have so many for A back, everybody's going to have their 10 cents. You have to be able to discern. What's good, feedback versus what's just somebody's creative style.
You know, like this, I have students do that with me. I tell students, if you don't agree with this, no, this is a stylistic note. You can agree or disagree. Like, you have to understand the difference, you know, yeah. What are the biggest mistakes? You see students making throughout this process, whether it's how they're approaching? Get writing submitting any point in this process. What are the biggest mistakes were like, oh, this is, so not
effective. I wish you could avoid all this stress, or whatever it is. Okay. Number one is not finalizing. Your college list by September, like early September, you really should have that pretty much finalize, your 10 schools, your targets, your reaches your safeties like pretty much finalized because then you need to figure out your strategy for early.
If you're doing early action, early decision, because those are either going to be due October 15th for A couple schools or November 1st, which is like the main first early deadline. And if you're applying to like you know, I had a student last year who we are working on a Columbia early action school and it was just a slow process because it really depends on you have to evaluate yourself in terms of how strong are you as a writer? Like, are you good at taking notes?
Are you consistent at being able to turn this stuff over? Does it take you a long time? Do you need more help? Because if you're trying to get through to three early action applications, you're going to be much more than a month. Do that you're going to need to like possibly three to get those done and in Tip-Top shape because you don't want to submit some part work. It's like what's the point. Especially if it's like your early action. Early decision, your eggs are in that basket.
You want to say except up for Success? Exactly. And also starting early, a lot of students are like yeah, I'm going to start the summer and then we start and I don't hear from them for weeks and then suddenly it's time to go back to school. And students think okay well I'll just get it done on the weekend or on Saturday morning. Over winter break ever went. Yeah, all this stuff and it's like oh it's a really bad idea
because it is so stressful. If you have all this free time all you need is like you know a couple hours a week to devote to it and the rest of the time you can take for your summer, enjoy a relaxed like do your thing, do your stuff but it's the students that are the most relaxed that have the best outcomes at the end of the year. They get their college lists in on time, they figure out their early action.
And she really early, they are. If you look if you haven't asked your teachers for four letters of Rec, I highly recommend you do that now, make sure you follow up with them thanking them, giving them a brag sheet if they ask for it. Look, the letters of recommendation. Are there to tell a story about you that you have not that you're not able to tell or you haven't told adequately because you can't I get teachers going to be able. Yeah better. Yeah and then your application.
So every piece of the application from the additional info section, which you think is like, well I wouldn't use that.
Yes, you will. You will use the additional info because there might be context of admissions needs to know about your class choices, whether there's like a break that you had to take off from school because a family relative passed away suddenly if there was stuff going on in your household that prevented you from being able to study for certain things or do your best in certain ways, they have to understand the holistic nature of who you are and what you've
been through. It's not just like data on a piece of paper to them. They want to know these pieces of content. Is that really have no other? There's no other way to fit them into the rest of application, unless you leave them into the writing. So it's really just there to help them. Understand you more deeply but the letters of Rec the essays, the activities list your transcript.
All of these things tell a story and so like I said start early like do not wait until the fall to begin this process and ask your teachers early for those letters of Rec, if you haven't already. They'll thank you and the right. You better letter. So you don't want an average letter, you want to give them the time. The respect, they're doing this on their own time on weekends or at night, give them the time and respect to let them know ahead
of time. Not just like two weeks before the deadline that you need their letter like, absolutely, you know. Yeah. I mean, it's basic common sense. I know students have so much stuff on their plate, sometimes it's really hard to think about these things. There's a lot, any parting advice or a first step that people can stop listening to.
Podcasting go Implement within their, their college essay, writing Journey. Whether it is doing the, I think I'll of practice or on a daily basis reflecting on how they're spending their time, what is their one action step that you think will set them up for success and be a really effective use of their time, okay? And this is done by executive function stuff, which I know is something we all need more of in our life Turtle.
I'm time block time block out. First of all, put together all the things you No, you need to do and begin doing. Whether that's like sign up for Kate's free Workshop. Write that down will list. Come up with a few ideas for my essays and I'm considering because you can bring this to my workshop you can ask me questions about it and I'll happily give you feedback right down. Ask my teachers for letters of Rec.
If you're still in school do it now and asterisk that like make sure to follow up with a follow-up, email from them, be thanking them using Kate's brag sheet that we're going to put Below in the show down in the show notes. So put on Those tasks that we talked about right? And then if you maybe you already know which schools you want to apply to gather their prompts they do they do put out the new prompts of the beginning of August but they usually don't
change that much. So chances are those essay prompts are going to stay the same anyway but yeah just FYI. So put those down and then start time, blocking out okay I'm going to start working. I'm going to go to this workshop on this day. Then IMA start working on my personal statement on this day, like Saturday mornings is my day for college stuff, Tuesday, night's, I'm going to tell my parents And so they don't bug me every single day for the next two months. Okay?
Mom, like I'm designating Tuesday night as College discussion night and that's it. Like, I don't want to hear about it, you know. Like, you can take proactive steps to prevent yourself from feeling, like everyone is on you. So start writing down all those things that, you know, you need to tell your parents, to go your Google calendar. They'll never bug you again.
They won't like, chunk it into specific tasks that can get done at the same time and then start time blocking out just two hours a week. To start, I love that and I think that's huge. And if you carry that practice through to the end of application season, you'll be in such good shape and you'll avoid what so many high schoolers experience, which is just the stress and burnout and overwhelm of being in a really important semester and having more
challenging classes. And also, navigating this huge laundry list of timelines and things that have to get turned in. So, I think that is essential to being successful throughout the whole process. Yes. And And that's a good point is, you can get time looked like college deadlines, like just College everything when you should have your list when you
should have this. And just put that into your calendar with reminders, like, okay, this is due in two weeks, don't just let it sit in your calendar and make sure you schedule the time to work on that stuff to otherwise, if it's not time to actually work on it and it's just the deadline in there, that'll come up in the deadline and it won't happen. So yeah, do both. Yes, 100%. No, I think that's key. Thank you so much. I'm gonna like down. Listen back to my sister.
I have to listen the whole thing. Yeah. All your tips are necessary, but I think this will be so incredibly helpful for high school students that I there have this on the horizon parents that don't know how to support their teens. And it's been like 30 thousand years since they apply to college and they're like we just showed up and you're like if only you knew what the process is like now they have no idea. It's got Snuffy, it's crazy. See. So I hope this has really helped.
I know, it will be, it was helpful for me and I wish I had listened to this conversation when I was going through this whole process because it just has evolved so quickly. And there's so much to stay on top of. And for a lot of teens, is the first time they've ever taken on anything of this scale. So, thank you for all of this info and recommendations and insight. And I know it's going to be so helpful. Can I add one more thing about the early strategy?
Of course, more and more. So the early application pools those Getting like 50 to 60 percent of the class is being filled by those early application pools. Yeah. So that's why I'm saying, focus in turn are early strategy right away. Like if you know where you want to go early action, it and make sure you look at the data to look at your specific school. Like how many people did they take in from the early? How many people did they take in from and you'll be able to
understand that strategy. If you you know, if you don't have any help for this. Yeah and that's someone who did early decision I cannot even explain to you how unstressed I I was come winter break. I was like, this is great. I'm done like it obviously doesn't work out that way for everyone and there are such a process. If you're reworking your essay over winter break and getting it
all your other applications. But if it does work out for early action, early decision, you'll be so much less stressed. Oh, yeah, I want that for everybody listening. Yeah, yeah. And actually defended area for everyone listening. Yes, we are. Thank you so much for saying, course, where can people Find your website. Find your resources. Follow along on social media, all of the things, okay?
So for those of you wanting to sign up for my free workshops, which go now, go to university, gurus.com workshops and you'll see a whole bunch up there. You'll see. We actually have one coming up. So, go to the workshops, sign up that I'll sign you up for my newsletter, which will get like lots of really, really valuable tips and content on upcoming events and just stuff to be aware of as we go through this process, it will kind of like help you stay on track to to get the news. Letter.
That's what I try to make that about is, like, helping people. Stay on track. That's keeping it front of mind every single week. Yeah, exactly. And I'm super diligent about sending that out every week, and then go to my Instagram because I try to keep that fun. And it's Kate France. Stone on Instagram. And if you want to do a one-on-one consult and just learn about, do I need one-on-one. Help is something that I shouldn't be looking to.
We can talk about that. I can figure out if you would be a good candidate for One-on-one coaching program, go to university gurus.com. / consult, or / chat either one work, University guru.com / chat. Yeah, amazing. All of that will be in the show notes. Thank you again. I'm so glad we got to do a part 2. I know me, too. This is awesome. Thank you so much for listening to this week's episode of she persisted.
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