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Growing up in my early teens and entering into my twenties, I had a story that I was really, really dumb, and this came from failing high schoolers, came from a stepdad telling me all the time how stupid I was. So I had a story that I would never be able to study, I'd never be able to make anything of myself, so I don't even try, and that story really held me back. Money definitely takes away stress, which can help with your happiness. But I think happiness is
just such an inside choice. It's something every single day that I push to find joy. You can always find a lesson in something, too, and if you can find a lesson, that's your gift. Life is happening for you, not to you.
Welcome to the CSA podcast. Busy and happy are not the same thing. We too rarely question what makes the heart seeing we work, then we rest, but rarely we play and often don't realize there's more than one way. So this is a platform to hear and explore the stories of those who found lives They adore, the good, bad and ugly, the best and worst day will bear
all the facets of seizing your yea. I'm Sarah Davidson, or a spoonful of Sarah, a lawyer turned unentrepreneur who swapped the suits and heels to co found Matcha Maiden and matcha Milk Bar. CZA is a series of conversations on finding a life you love and exploring the self doubt, challenge, joy and fulfillment along the way. Welcome back, Lovely Yighborhood. I can't believe it's November already. Oh my gosh, what is happening? Thank you so much for tuning into our
first anniversary episode last week. I hope you had as many chuckles as we did. You can see the plate EA is well and truly alive for the Davidsons. I'm excited to be back this week with another incredible guest whose name I'm sure you've heard before, but who, like many of our guests, has so much more depth than
their surface level media portrayal might suggest. You know. I love peeling back the layers of a well known name to explore the lesser known parts of who they are underneath, and Ash Binds got right on board for a juicy,
thought provoking chat. Ash's huge success in the health and fitness world, with a community of millions and now several businesses under her belt, belies her humble beginnings on dairy farms, the same way that her energetic positivity and confidence belies the negativity and narratives thrust upon her in early life.
Having followed her for many years now, I'd heard some of her story, but she is stronger and more resilient than I ever knew, and so generous in sharing her experiences with trolling, body image and motherhood so that others might feel less alone and better equipped for their own journeys. I'll let her tell you the rest, and we cover a lot of ground with so many nuggets that I hope you find as useful as I did. We recorded this one before the restrictions in Victoria easedibits, so ignore
those references. Of course, back then, that's all I could talk about, But I hope you guys enjoy as much as I did. Beautiful as she Welcome to the show, Ah.
Thank you so much for having me. I'm actually so excited to chat with you today because I love chatting to you on my podcast. And now we get to the opposite it's so exciting.
Oh my gosh, it was so much fun and such an honor to join you on your show, and we had such a juicy chat. As you know, I've loved following your journey for so many years now, and I couldn't believe you'd even heard of CZBA, let alone being keen to jump on the show.
I looks like, I'm you sure you want to have me on here? I'm so nervous and excited.
There's a lot of mutual fangirling going on, guys. Seriously, Well, I usually start with a little icebreaker, as you know, but I've added another one just because twenty twenty has been such a shit storm. I think we all forget to just check in with each other and simply ask how you're going. Of course, we will come to your brand new book, Fifteen Lessons That Changed My Life, which is absolutely incredible, But something that really struck me right
at the front. I think it was maybe even on page five, was that you're not defined by your problems but by your response, which has totally carried me through this entire year. So how are you, how are you responding? How are things going well?
As we were talking before you push record. I'm in Queensland, so we obviously have things a lot easier than what you do in Victoria. I can't even imagine what you guys are going through when the whole COVID thing struck, I suppose it was definitely a shock to the system. I think I had about a week where I was just freaking out personally with my son business. I was just like, what is going to happen? The unknown is so scary and not that we ever fully have control.
But I spent about a week just being like, what the hell are we going to do? But once I kind of got my head around it that I have to let go, like I have to surrender to this and what can I control it? What can I take control? And how can I pivot and make this work. I've got to find new ways and I do secretly love
a challenge. I love kind of being pushed out in my comfort zone to find new ways to do things because then I just learn more and the more I learn, the more I can teach, and I love teaching and helping my audience with anything. So this year has been a really challenging year emotionally for me, but because COVID I feel like a me to slow down and everything that i'd been pushing down and suppressing came up to surface.
And I've actually done the work, and I'm working through a lot of things that I've suppressed for years because I've been too busy. It's been challenging, but I'm really grateful for it. I found a lot of gratitude in now.
Yeah, I feel exactly the same, and I think that's something that really stands out about you and your book, but also in everything that you do. You're really open about doing the work, and obviously you know there's a lot of positivity and I think we both kind of identify as positivity pandas we really like to look for the silver linings and portray a really grateful, appreciative view
on life. But that doesn't involve not having problems. It just involves being able to process them and deal with them. And you do that. You take us along on the ride, which I really like. You don't come out months later and sort of announce it, you know, retrospectively, You share it in the moment, and I think that's really lovely.
Percent Like we were saying before, like the work never stops as soon as you think you've nailed something and new challenge arises and you're like, ah, okay, let's see how to work this out. And I do love being really authentic and sharing the ups and downs because I think that's what that's really relatable and provides connection, and we're all starving for more authenticity and connections. If I can provide that, then yeah, that's my goal daily.
Oh so good. And that leads perfectly to the actual lives breaker, which, as you know, is asking everyone what the most down to earth thing is about them? And I think even for people like you, who are really good at sharing all sides of the story and definitely not just the highlights, it still can be really easy to forget that underneath even a really relatable surface, you're still a human, You're a mom. There's lots of stuff
you don't share. Even if we see relatable things, they might not be what you think is the most down to earth thing about you. So what would you say, is something really normal about you?
Really normal? Such a funny question. I feel like the most humbling thing about myself, I think is that I don't ever forget where I came from. I didn't just land where I am today. I didn't come from money and really worked hard to get to where I am today. And I never am one to show up and say I have all the answers and I'm perfect. And that's why I share all the ups and downs because I think it's so relatable to be following people or to be around people that are owning their shit and figuring
out ways to get through it. And I love that whole journey. I never want to sugarcoat anything or pretend that I'm perfect, because I'm not. It's not reality, so online and offline, that's it's exactly who I am in real life as well.
Yeah, I think that's really important to never forget where you came from and always have an appreciation for those earlier times. And that's actually where I always start. The first section of every episode is Your Way toa which is pretty much tracing back from your childhood and your earliest times, because people often walk into your life now at this chapter and might forget that you've had periods of finding a path and losing it and finding it
again or finding a new one. I love that you try and really keep where you came from and those strong roots present in your story, because it is so easy to forget that you didn't just wake up one day and have it all and have it all figured out. And I think what's amazing about that you did the world is it does allow people who didn't come from money or didn't come from already having a position of influence to build an incredible community and to share that message.
But it does also make it easy to forget that lots of people did start from those humble beginnings. So take us back to that time. Tell us about young Ashy. What will you like as a child, What did you think you wanted to be?
Yeah, it's cool that we can talk about going back to the beginning because it's nice to even reflect on that. And if someone comes to my page now, you know they do really just see this highlight reel of photos. I mean taking it way back. I was brought up
in New Zealand with my mum and a stepfather. My real father actually left when I was really really young, so I didn't actually know him, which is also a really powerful part of my story and has been really I've got so much, so much gratitude for that experience. That's another whole story. We grew up in New Zealand then moved to Australia. I've always loved being super active. I grew up on dairy farms, riding motorbikes, animals, always had a passion to help, and that's I think fast
forward to now being active and helping people. That's always been a core of who I am, and that's in everyday life, that's in my career, that's online. Like bringing those together has really shaped who I am today and when my mum used to ask when I was younger, what are you going to be when you grow up? And I just love helping people, but I also love I love moving my body, I love dancing, I love being active. So being able to combine those in the career has been really really cool.
It's also really cool that I think in our generation in particular, the jobs that we have now didn't necessarily exist at the time we first started thinking about what jobs were, but by the time we actually got there, it was a possibility, which is something no generation before has really faced, Like they've never faced such a drastic change from the time they started thinking about their future
to the time they got there. So back then, what kind of jobs did you think that might translate to like, I'm sure this was not in the list of possibility.
Like I said, I.
Loved animals, so I actually wanted to own a dog wash and wash dogs. I've always had Labradors, and I say, you've got a retriever. I've always loved dogs, so I thought that would be a fun career. Then I wanted to be a police officer as well. I wanted to be able to help rescue people and help people, so that was always on the agenda, but ended up being obviously more on the fitness path. But they were the two things that growing up I thought I would want to do.
Oh my god, that is so you'd be a cop by day and just like wash people's dogs by night.
What a life people's dogs? Just a passion?
Yeah, that's your side hustle. So then what path you did obviously end up starting was more down the fitness sort of pathway. Getting your pet certification like a decade ago now, so very very early on before it became as trendy obviously as it is now. I love that so off when you can look back to your childhood and find so many clues and everything starts to make sense about where you end up eventually, but at the time, what made you choose that qualification? What made that your first step.
There's a few reasons. Obviously I loved helping me, but I love fitness. So when I met my husband, Steve, he'd been a personal trainer for ten years. Back then, it was quite a rare He's nine years older than me. It was quite a rare career choice, Like, it wasn't as glamorized as popular as what it is now. So watching him run boot camps and be able to help people with their help and fitness, I was just like, Wow,
that is what I want to do. But at the time I was working in retail jobs and long story cuts short. Growing up in my early teens and just as a kid and entering into my twenties, I had a story that I was really, really dumb. And this came from failing high school. This came from a stepdad telling me all the time how stupid I was. So I had a story that I would never be able to study, I'd never be able to make anything of myself, so I don't even try. And that story really held
me back from trying, which was really sad. So I actually got fired from my retail job. I came into work one day and we had this new boss for about two weeks. I've been there for over a year and my old boss loved me. This NEWEO boss said, I just don't have the hours for you anymore, so I'm letting you go. There was no reason, there was nothing.
It was obviously very traumatic for a twenty year old that really lived week to week, but it was the best thing that ever happened to me because being fired, I was like, what am I going to do now? And my husband had applied for government funding for me to go and do my personal training course amazing, So getting fired, like was the best thing that ever happened to me. If I hadn't been fired, would I ever have gotten my courage to let go of that old story that I was too dumb to take a chance
and go and get my qualifications. It took me a while. It took me three goes of the final exam to pass, so that story that I kept playing in my head that I was so dumb, I was so dumb, was so dumb. It was hard to work through that. But that in itself has been a blessing as well. It's really helped me, you know, step into that, lean into
that and work on that. So yeah, getting fired watching my watching Steve do what he does, and then just my core reason of wanting to I call pull to want to help people in a way of building a healthy, solid foundation with them life.
Oh my gosh, I love that so much. And see, I think this is the stuff that, even if you do talk about it every now and then, it's not necessarily the story people here first because so much has happened since then. But this is so fascinating to hear. I don't think anyone seeing you now, very confident in having done the work, the first thought wouldn't be that you had this incredibly negative narrative about yourself for so
much of the start of your life. So it's an incredibly inspiring and reassuring story that you can break neural loops about how you feel about yourself with enough work.
But also that I often say beautiful new beginnings often disguised as painful endings, and especially in this year where a lot of people might have lost their jobs, been made redundant, maybe been fired, or just had certain chapters end really abruptly, that it can be the time where the clean slate is maybe the best thing you've ever had, even if it's painful for a little while.
One hundred percent. And sometimes I think we don't see it straight away. It might take us a couple of years, it might take us ten years. Even relationships ending, friendships ending, or yeah, losing your job. You might not know straight away. But in year's time of five years time, I promise you will look back and say, thank goodness that happened. If that didn't happen, I wouldn't have met this person, or if that didn't happen, I wouldn't have had this opportunity.
If that led me to hear, that's who I've got to find gratitude in those hard, challenging times. Getting fired at nineteen and that was a second job, but actually been fired fired from in my life. So all those stories and self doubt and self sabotaged were just like sitting there. But if that didn't happen, who knows what I'd be here speaking to you today. Maybe not.
Yeah, That's why I'm so fascinated by this concept of sliding doors moments, because but for one tiny thing, your story could have been completely different. And also in that moment, it was like a fork in the road. You did have two choices. You could have kept strengthening that narrative and just kept going on with that life where you held yourself back from everything because you were totally consumed
by self doubt. Or you could choose to use that as a fire to be like, I'm to go ahead and make a different path for myself anyway, and I'm going to prove you all wrong. But another reason why I love going through this from the beginning is I think we're such an instant gratuity focused society and it's made us want. You know, when we decide I'm going to do my PT qualification, you want two days later to have this massive community and have made a life and a career out of it. We want it all
to happen overnight. But I think it's so important to remember everyone starts from scratch. Love that everyone starts from zero, and you literally started from getting your PT certification without knowing that it would go well at all, but you did it anyway. So the quote I always say, and everyone's heard me bang on about it a million times, but you don't have to see the whole staircase. To take the first step, you don't take the lift of
the end, otherwise you know, what's the point. And I mean, you've now propelled to a brand and community of five million people. But I'm sure you never expected that it could grow that big. So what were your wildest expectations back then? What did you think it would lead to? I imagine this has surpassed even your wildest dreams.
One hundred percent. I mean, back when I started, the online world wasn't as big as what it was. It's actually the eleventh year Instagram has been around, and I started eleven years ago on Instagram. I had no expectations. At age nineteen, I lived in a world of fear. If I could pay my bills, I was happy. And if I could show up every day for one person at the PT session, I was happy. If I could just make one little impact that helped their day be better,
I was happy. So I really had a low baseline for my life. So I didn't have any expectations, and I never thought Instagram. I mean, it was so new. I was on there, sharing photos, sharing transformations, sharing a bit of what I was up to. I was like, this is really cool, this app that shares beautiful photos and fun moments. But what I really soon realized was
how much connection came from Instagram. And I was I was quite big on Facebook back then it was a lot bigger than Instagram, and I'd already learned the connection, you know, that everyone was wanting on there, not just with health and fitness, but with me, with my life, and that really motivated me to just keep sharing all the ups and downs, all the challenges, everything I was
up to. Yah, not just with health and fitness, but it's so it's been so cool to witness and observe the journey of Instagram and how everyone has so much connection, so much opportunity, so much ways, so new ways to learn from each other. It really is such a cool platform. But back then, yeah, there was zero expectations. So when it just exploded in front of me and it definitely has been a massive part of my success, it's like, wow, cool,
this is awesome that we have the opportunities. Back when my mum was younger, this wasn't around, so it's been really really cool.
I also think that's a great reminder that sometimes having a really low bar of expectations, actually it takes the pressure off you, Like, you're not trying to reverse engineer success. You're just doing what you think is really good and then it happens to go really well.
That's like in life, as we have expectations on people all in situations, on work, on outcomes which you're disappointed because there's an expectation that it has to be like this, or if it doesn't happen, we're like, oh, so, I think lowering our expectations or swapping expectations for appreciation is
a really valuable lesson as well. So I think it was good not to have expectations because nowadays I even catch myself too, like if a photo doesn't get you know, X amount of lights or engagement, I'm like, oh, I start to analyze it and I have to quickly snap myself out of that and just get out of that phase because it's not good. But back then, when there's no expectations, you're just enjoying the ride and you're trusting that whatever happens happens. That's a pretty cool way to live.
Yeah, yeah, totally. So looking back from then to now, if you had to divide your story and the journey and the growth into sort of chapters, what would they be from the start to now? And are there any that you look back on that you sort of cringe over and go, oh my god, Like maybe it was appropriate at the time, but obviously the world is changing so much, and I think you're actually you're meant to grow out of old chapters and into new ones. And if you don't cringe at what you were doing at
one point in time, then you probably haven't evolved. So how would you break up the story from then to now?
Yeah, definitely interesting, Queshing. I can see where you're coming from when you say, oh, you kind of cringe at some of your chapters, But yeah, there's cringing moments, and especially being on a public platform, there's times where I have said things or done things that I look back and go, oh, Ash, what were you thinking? And it's so much harder when you have an audience to judge and watch your mistakes. That was not fun. So there's
a couple of cringe moments there, for sure. But I have such gratitude for all of the lessons and chapters because honestly, if they didn't happen, I wouldn't have been forced to grow and learn and step up and raise my baseline. So I'm really grateful for all the chapters. I think I see it as before my stepdad and after my stepdad. He was such a massive crucial part of my upbringing and why I'm here today, and then before before my husband and now, and then before my
child and now. I feel like they're my chapters that have really shifted and shaped who I am. There's a couple of little ones in there, like you know, we'll go into a later trolling online. There's other little chapters in there that I think it really shaped me, but they're probably the main ones that I think we could drive deeper into if you wanted to.
Yeah. Absolutely, I think we've got a whole section on the nata, which I think is really important to look at. How as you've mentioned and as the book. Actually you're so good at dealing with this topic in the book that it really is the negativity that forces you to grow. And in the super cruisy times, you don't actually learn much, like they're great, but nothing really develops you as a person. You're just kind of riding the wave.
But the balance isn't it. It's like you need the hard times to grow, but then you don't You don't want to always feel like you're having to strive and grow and achieve and be on this hustle and doing the work like sometimes you do just want to chill and enjoy life for what it is. It's a juggling act of finding that balance.
Yeah, yeah, totally. So before we get to that, I'd love to ask, I think this is such an interesting or moment for so many people when they go from just the hustle and not having really any expectations to suddenly realizing I've made it, Like this is actually turned into a business. I can make my livelihood from this,
and I'm impacting people's lives. What moment do you remember as that all hitting you like you felt successful and looking back at how you measure success, have your metrics changed sort of over that time.
Yeah, definitely, I think they've changed a lot. But let's go back to the first part of that question when you asked, was there a moment there? Definitely was. There was a moment when our first business, it exploded in a couple of weeks beyond anything I could ever I'm talking hundreds of thousands of people, you know, purchasing what we were selling online. That was like, wow, Okay, I've made it. Oh my gosh, there's X amount of money in my bank. I'm helping this many people, I've got
this many followers. Like back then, I was I was leading, I think, in in that industry. So I thought that was successful. But that didn't last very long that feeling. So what I've learned over the years is yes, money and having followers and having I suppose a little bit of fame. Even I thought, yes, that's cool and blah blah blah, but it is not what makes me happy. Money definitely takes away stress, which can help with your happiness. But I think happiness is just such an inside choice.
It's something every single day that I push to find joy in all the moments. It doesn't mean that every day is happy and positive and everything's smooth sailing, no way. There's challenges in your life, my life, everyone's life. Everyone listening will be thinking of ten things that you know might not be going to plan. It might be hard. But I make a conscious choice every single day to find joy, and I think I can feel happy. When I feel happy, that's when I feel most successful. And
also just contribution. Contribution is a massive, massive, need of mine to always be giving back. If I'm not giving back and being outside of my little bubble, if I get stuck in my own head and stuck in my bubble and get into that suppose victim way of living, and I'm not contributing and helping the bigger picture and the community, and I don't feel as successful and I'm making a difference, that's what I feel. Yes, this is what I'm meant to be doing, and this is what feels good.
I think that's so interesting because I think a lot of us go through that kind of existential crisis of success where what you once thought were your milestones, you get there, they don't bring you the happiness that you thought, and then you're sort of like, well, what is this
all about? Then? And you realize that you can't attach your happiness to the things that will never fulfill you once you get there, that like they're attainable, but they're kind of not, like it'll never be enough if you attach it to things that are just volume and you know, numbers and stuff, because you're always going to want more once you get there, Whereas if you turn it into an internal operation, it's like you can have that every day, regardless of what's going on around you.
And I think to have full emotional freedom is to not have any attachments to anything, any any situation, any outcome. I think that is true emotional freedom and that brings a lot of happiness and like ease through life as well. And I think think a lot of women, especially listening, will relate to this, like they think, when I get to this body weight, when I look like that, when I get this partner, that's and I'll be happy. And they spend you know, six months, a year, five years
walking towards this goal because that's where happiness is. That they forget to enjoy that ride, that journey, and there goes five years of their life. Then they get that six back and they go, oh what now, Holy shit? What now. That's why I think detaching happiness as a destination and instead trying to look at happiness as a journey and find that every day you have a choice on what you focus and what you focus on is what you feel. So if you focus on all the negatives,
you're going to feel all that. If you can focus on the positive, focus on the gratitude, focus on what you do have, not what you don't have you will feel that.
Oh my god, I'm so motivated and inspired right now. I'm like, this is why we love you. So before we move on to the next section, just from your actual technical training and fitness and nutrition side, I'd love to pick your brains while we have you, because that is you've become such an inspiration on lifestyle overall, but obviously have your beginnings in fitness and wellness and nutrition.
So from a practical standpoint, if you had to leave people with maybe your three top fitness tips from all of your past decade of learning and growing, what would they be? And I imagine that the mistake of attaching things to really tangible goals is probably one of them that you see quite often.
Yeah, there's quite a few. My top three fitness goals. First of all, I would say find something you enjoy, find movement, and find food you actually enjoy, because if you are not enjoying what you're doing safe. If you told me, if you said to me Ashley, for you to lose weight, be fit, healthy and strong, you need to run fifteen fifteen kilometers a day and eat chicken and bccoli five days. There is no way I'm going
to stick with that. So it is so important for me to find food and movement that really feels good for my body, so that I stick with it. Because whatever you do consistently, you're going to get a result. It's when you're jumping off and on and doing things you don't enjoy and canceling. You know, fast going to go for a run tomorrow morning, You're probably going to cancel because I don't enjoy it. And so finding something
that you really enjoy is really important. Stop comparing. We can sometimes start on our health and fitness journey, and if you're just starting, but I've been doing this for eleven years. You're comparing your chapter one with my chapter thirty, that's going to make you feel like shit. The comparison needs to stop it just it really does hold us back. And I think the last one is and definitely not the least important one. It is so important is to
have support and accountability around you. It's great to think that you can keep your motivation and discipline by yourself. At the end of the day, we're human and we thrive on connection and we thrive on doing things together.
And I think having a tribe or just a backbone of support to help you through those days that are a bit challenging, because there's going to be challenging days with health and fitness where you feel like giving up, where it feels too hard, We are not getting the results that you expected to get, and you want to go back into your old habits, and you consciously have to make those decisions to keep going. So having a
backbone of support is really really important. People that you know wanting to lift you up, wanting to meet you for that walk, wanting to help you choose healthy meals, like a partner, even your significant other, having them support you with your goals is really really important. They'd be my top three.
That's such a good one, That last one. I think just even from your journey to this point, you can see the impact both ways of significant people in your life. They really do shape your experience and how you feel about yourself. And that quote is just so true. You know, you're the sum of the five people you spend the most time with.
Yeah, I love that one. Checking everyone again, even lately, I feel like my closest friends, the one I'm surrounding myself with, like we're all on this big growth journey. And that was such a almost like a grieving of some older friendships. But I still love them, but they can change and adapt. And when you're checking with the five people that you're hanging around the most, I feel like they do really impact your energy and what you say and how you do things. So I do love
that one. I think it's great.
Yeah, yeah, totally. And it is important to recognize that the five people, depending on what you're going through, I'm not going to be the same at all times. It doesn't mean you don't have other friends, it's just the five that are in your most immediate like the ones you're interacting with the most, need to reflect what that period of time is.
For you that season.
Yeah totally. So in terms of nutrition, what are the things that you found that you do love? Like, for example, if you're on a desert island, what are three items of food that you couldn't live without?
Yes, definitely, anyone who follows me on social media, I am obsessed with sweet potato. I get enough. I have it every single day, if not twice a day. I whether it's roasted, whether it's mashed, whether it's fried, whether it's in chips, whether it's even raw. I love it like, I'm so passionate about sweet potato. You are my husband or anyone. It is just so sweet topriato.
Number one, did you do say you're so passionate about I.
Am because there's so much you can do for it. It tastes so delicious and it's so satisfying. I love it. I do love it. If you ever come to my house, I will make you my favorite sweeptato dish.
Oh my god. When I can go more than five kilometers from my house, I'm there, babe.
Yeah, So that's number one. Number two would be frozen banana. Oh, just because it's so yummy. It's the base of pretty much all my smoothies. It makes things thick and creamy. You can make began ice cream out of it. I just think it's so versatile. It's such a staple ingredient. And then number three, which I know you'll agree with me, is my clean treats.
Oh my gosh, so go it's delicious.
And I'm all about living a healthy, balanced lifestyle or also not depriving yourself for what you love. And I'm a sweet tooth, but I don't want to be blocking downing a block of cabria every single night because my body hates dairy. I don't want to eat all the process crap. So clean tiss are just a healthy alternative and there's lots of versatility with the flavors, so they'll be my top three yummy foods that I would have on my desert island.
And they also so easy to make. Like my big barrier in the kitchen is like I just don't it's not my natural habitat, you know, like I just get confused. It's like it's really overwhelming. I love that you just like you just add like two or three ingredients, mix it all together, and they're done.
One hundred percent. So it's all about making it easy and maintainable because what you stick with is how you're going to get your results and enjoy it.
Yeah, totally. So speaking of your product business, and you also have a fashion line as well. That leads me to the fact that you're also a businesswoman on the side. I mean, like you have just so many things going on. How was moving into a product range both in food and in fashion from having been the product all that time? Like was that a really big adjustment? How did you
find that? I feel like it's just such a different I've got kind of gone the other way from only being a product to now sort of being the service as well, and it's they're totally different.
Hard, very hard, as you would know logistically behind the scenes of going from online to product was very hard. But in saying that, I do have a few different product based businesses now as well as you know my app, but baseline for me having an active word label. I want everyone to live their best life, but I also want them to have the best active wear. And I live in active where day in, day out is what you're seeing in unless I'm going on a date night
with my husband. But I have such a passion and a pool and a desire to create the best active wear. I love the whole process. I love the designing, I love the sampling, I love the marketing, I love the photo shoots. I love seeing all the girls in Baseline
in my active wear. So it was definitely challenging. There's been a lot of ups and downs, and even like little things like ordering too much stock and then collecting dust on a shelf, like there's so many challenges behind the scenes or website crashes or stop them arriving like Corona this year has been so challenging just trying to get our stock. But overall, yeah, it's hard, but I would not do any I wouldn't want to do anything else.
I absolutely love the whole process of it, and I feel like I'll be doing this when I'm eighty, Like, I love it.
Wow, It's really cool how you started with one thing and then you've gradually added all these different elements as you've grown as well, and then added the book, so you've got like you're operating all air your brain at once. But I feel like some people prefer to have that, not just one single focus, but they are fulfilled from lots of different things at once.
And I think, yeah, when I think about it, I'm like, WHOA, I do have a lot going on. They seem to just they really do flow because they all are interconnected. They're all still based around helping women with their confidence, helping women make healthy decisions with their lives, helping inspire, educate, motivate, lead women to build a healthy foundation. Like it all comes in and matches together, where it's the clean treats, the act of wear my at the book, Like it's
all got a purpose to help and to serve. So yeah, I find it really flowy, just flowy.
You know, just flowy. Before we continue with today's chat, a quick word from our partner in yay, Priceline Pharmacy. If you're anything like me, Priceline Pharmacy is your one stop shop for all of your health, beauty and wellness needs. With new research revealing that ninety five percent of Australian women feel stressed and often multiple times per day, Priceline Pharmacy wants to help you destress and refocus this spring, which couldn't be more important during these crazy times we're
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and speak to one of their amazing team members. Now back to the show, So two last quick questions before
we move to the more juicy n Ata section. One of the things that I find really inspiring about you is you've managed to integrate motherhood into your life in a way that it is a really difficult juggle to run your own businesses, and especially when you do have an audience that's so big and that asks so much of you, and then also have a child that you're trying to grow into the world and be a really present mum. So how has motherhood You mentioned that was
one of your big chapter changes. How has that changed your views on your own health and fitness, on balance, on running businesses, on your expectations of yourself, on like you've written the book since then, Like, how have the sort of fifteen lessons that have changed your life changed to the fifteen that you might have had before you had a child.
Yeah, he changed everything for me. I felt like I've always had a lot of purpose to help, but he just gave me a whole new purpose on life. And he is the driving force for me to continue to do my work, to unpack my shit, to be better person because I just want the best for him, and I can't give him the best unless I'm being the best for myself. And that's where I want to really
touch on and talk to you. And the audience about making sure that we're looking after ourselves, because you know, a lot of women and people say like, oh, I'm going to be the best I can be for my kids. But if we are not filling our own cup up and not looking after ourselves and not taking time to take care of our bodies in our minds, we're pouring from an empty cup. And one of my favorite sayings is I always want to give everyone around me the
best of me, not the rest of me. So yes, I have my son, but he's not all I have. I'm a mom, Yes, I'm a wife, I'm a business woman, I'm ashy, I'm fun, I'm a friend. There's so many layers as to who I am, and I like to really honor all of those. And I think a lot of moms can get really lost in motherhood because they just give everything to the child, which you know is amazing.
We want to do that, but me personally, I think it's really important to make sure we're still living our lives for ourselves as well and doing things that light us up and make us happy and give back, and we're not dimming that side of us just to be a mum. I think we can have our cake and eat at all. I think I can be a mum and I can be a business woman. I can be
sexy wife, and I can be fun friend. I can be you know, I've got so many parts of me and I don't ever want to shut any of them down because I don't believe that's me being my authentic self. And I want him to see that whatever he wants to live in life, whatever he wants to achieve, whoever he wants to be, he can do that. But I need to walk the walk, not just talk the talk.
That's such a valuable will reminder. I think a lot of women do. See. There's so much mum guilt because there are so many societal norms and expectations around you what a dedicated motherhood sort of neff like.
We talk about this so much. Even the comments I've got over the years like oh you're a part time mum. Yeah, that one comes flying at me a lot, And you know, I see that for what it is. It's obviously got nothing to do with me. It's obviously highlighting something that they might be feeling or not knowing how to express. But there is so much mum guilt around I think the word guilt, it's got a lot of heaviness to it. And when other mums come to me and say, do
you ever feel mumguilt? Like, for sure, there's times where I'm like, oh, you know, I've spent a lot of time working this week where I could have been with Tage. That's his name, just in case you don't know. Guilt is when you think whatever you're doing is wrong, and then there's shame around that. So when mums come to me and say, I feel so guilt. You have gone
to the gym. So you've gone to the gym to work on your health, to work on your fitness, and to clear your head, to work on your mental health. Should you feel guilty for all of those things? Do you come back more patient? Do you come back more happy? Do you come back healthier with more energy? You make better decisions with your food? Should you feel guilty? Abound that? And when they heal of that, it just changes their mindset to me, like, oh god, why are you feeling
guilty about going to the gym? Like how much? How many positive effects come off from going to the gym? And I also say to them, would you if I said to you, I'm feeling guilty of going to the gym? Would you would you reconfirm that, say, yeah, you should feel guilty, you shouldn't have gone to the gym. You would never speak to your best friend like that, So
why would you speak to yourself like that? All this respect and love and empathy and compassion that you have for all those around you that you care for, that you don't give that to yourself.
It's such a such a valuable reminder, and so much of what's really valuable about your message, and particularly the book I found, is that all fifteen lessons, and I'm not going to reveal them all to everyone here because they have to go and buy the book, but all of them are just reframing. They're not necessarily changing your circumstances. Because I think we we straight away go to like what do we need to change in my life? It's like,
maybe you don't need to change anything. Maybe it's just the mindset that you bring to those things that changes. Like instead of guilt for exercising or taking time for you, it's actually a community service. It's actually being a responsible person.
And it's changing the meaning on things. I think the immediately put on situations can really be powerful in a negative or a positive way, and we get to choose.
So before we do, I keep saying, before we move to the next section, I just have so much to talk to you about. This is so interesting with all the platforms and forums that you have. What led you to a book? What inspired you to think this is the right time for a new media and to put it in book form and to make it so concise, Like what sparked that kind of decision that I'm going to extend into something different, a different medium to the way that you usually communicate with your audience.
Yeah, definitely. I mean I love Instagram and love Snapchat. I'm a massive Snapchat persons, and I love YouTube. I love all the platforms. But I feel like I can only just touch the surface. I can speak about something, and you know, even on Instagram, I learned the other day you can only have a hundred of those little squares at the top of your stories. And I have capped that quite a few times. So yes, I can talk.
Everyone knows I can talk underwater. But anyways, last year I was running these retreats for about twenty girls, so twenty women from I was going to say just Australia, but a couple flew over from America and Canada and we would come together for what I named the Ultimate Girls Weekend. And the weekend was full of connection, laughter, good food, education, motivation, training, trip to buyer and like it was just whatever you can think of any girls weekend,
Like we bought it all together. And one of the talks that I did, we brought in lots of different experts, but one of the talks that I did with the girls was just the fifteen Lessons that Changed My life. And I would talk to the girls for hours on this and they would ask questions and it's just such this awesome like morning that we had together and at the end they would just like, well that lesson, like that's going to change my life. I never thought about it like that, or I can relate to you on
that I've been through something similar. Thanks so much talking about this, And I realized the impact that that one talk was having with these twenty girls. But I went, how can I get that to so many more? And yes, I could have done on YouTube, I could have done this and that, but I just thought a book that everyone can go back and read, and it's really easy to digest and they can take it at their own pace.
Was a really good idea and I'm really really proud of it, and I feel like it will really changed the lives of so many women. It's very relatable, it's very easy to digest the information, and I think even when you read it, you might not connect with all the chapters right now, but in a year's time you might go through something similar and go, oh, God actually spoke about it. I'm going to go back and read that chapter and see how she figured out her way
to get through that. So I think the book's going to help so many people for different reasons. So yeah, I'm really proud of it.
I'm so glad that you are. I think that's one of the things about a book is it is really timeless and you can come back to it over and over and it is It's there's something really beautiful about having a physical book in a digital world where I'll like see something really really motivating that I will want to come back to in a year and I can't find the link, or I haven't saved it, or it's disappeared, or when it's physical, you can go back to it.
You can scribble it, you can like leave post it notes. I just I love the nature of interacting with the book, and I think it's beautiful the way that you haven't over complicated it. It's beautiful, like all the little icons
and stuff. It's just such a pleasure to read. And I think you can have a beautiful connection with someone in a digital world, but to have something in your hands that you're interacting with, that you know you poured over to write and that I'm now like gay and it's just a beautiful, beautiful experience.
It's special, isn't that? It really is?
Yeah, So the big section you're na ayta, you know, starting from the narrative that you had to break the self doubt they came with that. You've talked about comparison. That's mum girl. You've touched on everything. I know you've had a lot of trolling, and I think that is a side effect of having a big influence. I kind of see it as you've kind of made it when you've got a hater, but it doesn't make it any
less painful. There's just a world of negativity that I'm sure has come with building a profile over the last decade. So talk us through some of your toughest time, some of your biggest challenges. I think we get quite a skewed version of trolling or a skewed version of people's experiences because it's not that lovely to talk about. It doesn't sort of get the same airtime as the positive stuff.
So yeah, just take us through the behind the scenes and then how you've dealt with that, and keep bouncing back.
I love talking about it, and then I don't. I love talking about it because there is so many valuable lessons and I'm so proud of myself that I've gone through that and gotten out of it. But I never want to talk about it and for anyone listening to think that I'm telling these stories to their victim, because I'm not. I'm actually so grateful for all of it. It's definitely been a lot over the years, and I think because I started Instagram when it first started, I
made a lot of mistakes along the way. As you do growing up, as you do in new careers, as you do a new relationship. We all make mistakes, but mine was just on a platform for millions of people to giveudget. You know, some of the mistakes I made, I felt like saying back to these trolls of people, have you never done that before? Are you that perfect? You've never made a mistake before, and hear you by judging me for you know, falling over here or doing
this and that. It's definitely been very challenging. I thought I was very thick skinned until a couple of years ago, which I talked about this really deep in my book. It was the hardest chapter to write, and even when I was speaking on the audiobook I did an audiobook for the book, I just cried. It was really really hard to even revisit it. It was a tough time in my life where a group of girls decided to make a hate page, and I'm guessing it was almost
like a gossip page. You know how we everyone talks about the Kadashians eye you see what Kim did here, and this has happening. Almost felt like I was and on my reality show that they were very interested in and liked to gossip about it. So I think it started off as an innocent kind of gossip page, and
they were screen recording and taking screenshots of everything. But you know, a couple of hundred girls turned to a couple of thousand turned into ten thousands, and it got to a point where these women we ended up having to take legal action. It was absolutely awful. Everything I did, everything I said, everywhere I went, I was followed, screenshot it was posting this forum. There was threats, you know, not just online at my house, people following me home,
threats of my son. It was awful. And at the start I found it so hard, and I was vocal about it being so hard, and I tried to talk about it online. But the more I spoke about it, the more it fed them, and the more I spoke about it, the more I could also see the impact it had on my husband, or my mom, on my friends, people around me. So that's when I started to shut down. I started to think, Oh, I'm going to put on a brave face. I'm going to pretend nothing's wrong. I'm
going to suppress it. I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay. And obviously you can only do that for so long. And then it got to the point where I just, I honestly didn't want to get out of bed anymore. I had this beautiful two year old son two or three must have been. I had an amazing supportive husband, had all these friends and family, so many beautiful women online that loved me and supported me, but the hate was just overriding all and I got to a point where I just I didn't want to be here anymore.
I thought the only way this pain and this suffocation of people watching me and criticizing everything I do, was to go. And obviously that at that point was the point that I reached out for help, and thank goodness I did, and I knew I would never actually go and do something to myself, but I just didn't know, and I didn't think there was another option for this
to stop. And I also thought, gosh, I'm getting through this just but what about all the other people they're doing this too, Like maybe if I was to end my life, maybe then they'd learn and they wouldn't do this anymore. Maybe that would be a standpoint of Oh, we can't troll because look at the impact it has on everyone. That was where my mind was at. It was awful. So reached out and I got two life coaches and I had sessions with them for six months. The coross Us an arm and leg. But it was
the best thing that ever happened. To me once again. They taught me so much about why people do the things that they do, about compassion, about human psychology, and I learned so much and I'm so grateful for that experience now because I feel like I have such a valuable lesson to teach and I've gotten through it and I conspire and help other women get through really tough times, not just with online trolling. But I promise you there
is always a way out of things. There is always someone that cares for you, there is always someone to listen. There's always someone that can understand. It's just been brave enough to stand up and go, hey, I'm not okay. That's my story of trolling. In a nutshell, it was an awful one, but I'm really grateful for the experience and what it's taught me and how it shaped me. And I've felt so much resilience as well, which is
so invaluable. I don't think I can get that from much else but going through a really, really tough time.
And I'm so grateful that you do talk about it despite it being really painful and just icky, because it does fuel the side call. Sometimes when you do talk about it, it kind of gives the trolls of satisfaction that they've had an impact in your life, and you kind of just don't even want to talk about it at all.
But that's why I avoided it.
Yeah, but I think it's so important to talk about firstly, because so many people who see the real highlights of your life aren't in a position where they could ever understand there's no equivalent in their life of trolling at the scale that you get it, And it's so important
to remind people that this happens. Like I think people don't know otherwise they don't know the risks of like imagine it's so hard to explain, but it's like if everyone's self doubts and their worst fears were actually being voiced all day every day. Like that's the closest I
can kind of describe it as. And I think it's important that people know that this happens and know then what your strength actually is to have come through that and know that it can be like social media can be a very damaging and scary and overwhelming place, but you can build the tools to face even the harshest of criticism that's like a total barage at you twenty f you can still build the tools to come through and find confidence and joy and find the excitement in
your life again, because anything negative does for a while, it takes the joy out of everything you do.
One hundred percent.
But I think the fact that you've found it again is really inspiring for others that no matter what the challenge is, digital or not, that you can get help, get therapy, talk to friends, build the right support network and be able to build that resilience back up again against any kind of negativity.
One hundred percent. And what I always love to say too is you can always find a lesson in something, too, And if you can find a lesson, that's your gift. Life is happening for you, not to you. That happened for me to help me grow, to help me heal even old wounds of high school bullying. You know, lots
of stuff resurfaced because I hadn't healed it. There's so much, so many gifts that can come in the most challenging, painful times, and we might not see them straight away, but I think if we can hunt for them, we can find the gift and it can make the whole situation worthwhile and a lot lighter.
Oh my god, I just I have so much admiration for you. I've had like two haters, and it literally bowled me over for weeks and weeks and weeks and took all the joy I had, everything I was doing.
I just whether it's one comment and you've had two and I've had probably thousands, can cut ash in and probably gets millions on the daily. You know, no matter what it is, it's all valid. I don't. I don't lie the comparison. I'm like, oh, girls come to me sometimes, Oh, I know you've had it so much harder, but I'm really struggling with this one. And I shouldn't be upset because of this one. I said, you not a robot. Yes you should be upset. That is valid for you
to feel like that. Doesn't matter how many I've had. It's not a comparison for who has it harder. That's how you feel. That's your truth, and we need to let's let's sit with that and let's work through that. So, whether you've had two or thousands, it's all valid. It's never it's never nice to experience or to have someone say things about you, or assume things about you, or spread rumors about you or post your ugliest photo. That's not fun. No one wants to go through that, really, And.
I also think it's good for people who haven't had that experience and who don't necessarily live on the platform in the way that we do, to understand that. I think a lot of people think, oh, well, you put yourself out there. You put a lot of your life online, so you kind of you invite that. And I think even with like Hollywood level celebrities, people say that that it's like, yeah, you get hate, yeah you get splashed all over the media, but you kind of put yourself
out there. But I don't think anyone putting themselves out there invites attacks on your children, invites stalking, invites like it's important to remind people it's not. It is a necessary outcome of having a profile, because that's how the landscape works. There will always be jealousy into a poppy syndrome, but it shouldn't be that way. Like it's not normal.
It's not a normal level of just subtle criticism. It's like open attacks and physical world following and stuff that you've had to deal with.
And I like that comment of oh, well, you know you should expect that because you put yourself out there, it's like it almost validates that. It's like, is that right? Then? Is that okay for them to do that? It is never okay for bullying, and we are losing too many people,
not just young, older from online trolling. Like when it needs to stop, it does, I'll always be an advocate for standing up for it it not being okay, And I'm so glad it happened to me and not a thirteen year old girl that couldn't handle it, tipter over the age. I'm so grateful they were on me because they've got to it. But you never know the impact
of your words. You don't know, you saying one little comment to someone online that could be the last straw for them when they've already gone through losing their mum to cancer, They've gone through their house being robbed, they've lost their job, their partnership. You know, you don't know what they've gone through, and then your tiny comment is just that one war that just they say no too much. Your words can have such impact and we need to remember they can be so powerful in a negative and
a positive way. So just choose your words wisely.
Oh gosh, Ashley. That's I mean that if anything comes out of you sharing that experience, that's what I hope that people take from it, just to remember the impact of their words, but also to remember from a positive side that the one thing you say could be the thing that pushes someone over the edge towards their joy or towards them dream. Your words really matter, and I think we forget that, yeah, because we're like, oh, I'm not famous, Like they're not listening to me.
Yeah, one hundred percent. We should be cheering for each other and pushing each other and encouraging each other. It definitely works on the other end of the spectrum as well.
So from the other end of the spectrum. Something I've found just over the past I think maybe eighteen months or two years is there's of course the negative side of over connection and the digital world, but I've learned you can also overdo it in a positive way, like you can have too much of a good thing as well.
Everything that you do when you love your job doesn't feel like work, which means it's very hard to put in boundaries because people are messaging you and you are impacting their life and you want to be part of it. And you want to show that you appreciate their support so much and replied every message and all that kind
of thing. But I think on the flip side of that, social media draws you in on in a good way because you do have this platform and community, but then it does consume all of you and can easily lead to burnout and you're overconnected and you don't have time in the real world and you don't get to just switch off. So how do you deal with that over connection and that I have such an internal people pleaser that I feel like I do want to acknowledge every comment and I do want to sort of live on
the platform to just like show my gratitude. But sometimes you have to just have a boundary to preserve your like yourself.
Yeah, no, I totally hear you, totally feel you totally understand. Live it daily, live it daily. I'm exactly like you. I am just so appreciative of every comment, every day and every life that I want to acknowledge ever and to make sure they feel that I'm so grateful. I think over the years I've gotten a lot better at setting boundaries and just being better at my time management. So you know, yes, I'm very consumed in my work and I love it, so I find it very hard
to stop working. But I also love being a mum. I also love having date nights. I also love my girlfriends. I also love going to get a massage. I also love listening to Cza on my morning walk. You know, there's so many other things that I doing that I set boundaries for all of that. And if I don't get to have my cake and eat it too, I use that quite a lot, but and it gets to all things that I love and enjoy. Then I don't
feel balanced. I don't feel as happy. So I just am very good at planning my week and making sure that I'm incorporating all the things that make me happy, which include yeah, family time, work, my own time, self care, all of that. And when I don't do that, I definitely feel out of balance. And there is seasons and times.
I'm not saying I'm perfect. There is seasons and time, especially around an active were launched and my whole week is consumed with shoots, building the website, making sure everything's ready to go. There is a lot of I suppose I want to say stress, that's the wrong word, but high energy and it needs my focus that even you know, next week we're shooting and we're getting ready for the campaign, and I've already said to Steve, my husband, like you know, he will need to do more of the parent life
stuff because I'm going to be at work more. There's different seasons, so it's like being accepting of those times, but overall trying to find that balance of being connected everywhere, get off your phone, be connected to yourself, your partner, and online it's not just just the online world.
Yes, easy to forget, but important to remember. Is there anything else that you want to mention in the n ATA section before we move on?
Yeah, I would love to talk about just thinking of that. Naighty A is change. I feel like as we grow up we change so much. We change our careers, we change through who we are, we change our friendship groups, how we eat, how we move. I often joke to my husband and say, God, I feel like you've married seven different women. I wonder how many women you're going
to marry because I change all the time. Yeah, I'm okay with the change, but I feel like online or I don't know, maybe even in different friendships or people around you that can struggle with seeing the change or who used to be, and I think we need to give it a little bit more recognition to the change in our us evolving and put it into perspective. When I first started, my first business was the Ashybynes Bikini
Body Challenge. Oh my god, it was yeah. So it was this this twelve week challenge that was all around Australia, thousands of girls getting amazing results. It was, you know, where we built everything to what it is now. It was amazing, But all I was posting was me in bikinis. It was revolved around everyone looking good in a bikini
because that's what I was hearing everyone wanted. So I feel like for so long and even now I get to put into this box of being this bikini girl, all the fitness girl, I'm like, hang in a second, There's so many more layers to me, and I've changed and evolved so much. It used to be I used to want to just look at a bikini. That was my focus for so many years. I trained so hard, I hate so well. It was my focus. That was
what I wanted to be and that's definitely changed. Of course, we want to look good and feel confident, but there was so many layers to me, and I've evolved so much as a human. I think it's really important to remember that we all do change and evolve into love and have compassion and patience and love for people as they do change and grow.
Oh that's such a good point, particularly in this year where everything is changing constantly. One constant is change. I think we are by default creatures of habit, and we do we do attat you know that word we're talking about before attachment. We do attached to how we think things are and then get really unsettled when they changed dramatically. But I think you're right. I think we're meant. Like we said before, everything happens in chapters or seasons, and
they're meant to change, They're meant to roll over. You're meant if like my partner and Nick and I have been together for eleven years, if we hadn't been with
seven other versions of each other, I'd be worried. Like I'd be like, oh, well, I'm still nineteen year old me, Like that's a really true because she was drunk and like one last question on Ata that actually I hadn't thought of until now, But having been there, really forging and blazing a trail in this industry before it even really was an industry, and then adapting to a completely different market that is changing all the time and that has new entrants, and that has changed in what people
want as well. I think the need for connection and authentic is kind of new. Like at the beginning it was a very polished and preened platformer, is now people are wanting a bit more as we all evolve and change with these times. How have you dealt with comparison with that need to keep innovating and keep doing different
things and be new and fresh. But having such a saturated market now, and it's I find that you get so easily drawn into like oh, she's doing that, and I want to do that, And it's really hard to just keep the blinkers on and stay focused on why people come to you for what you do differently. And I think we often see something and our first reaction is every way that it's different to what we're doing.
I must be doing it wrong, like oh my god, she's doing that, And especially in an industry that is the big players are all on digital, so you see it all constantly, like how do you stay focused in that environment.
Yeah, I've really struggled with that over the last couple of years. I think once again this year has been my word of the year was alignment. And the last couple of years I felt a little bit out of alignment in trying. I was stuck in comparison of watching what everyone else was doing in the industry, and there was so many different ways to eat and move, and I just wanted to people please and have a platform
that cave for everyone and have every single option. And I got so stuck in that rabbit hole of doing things that really weren't aligned with me. And I was, you know, trying to have this meal plan, this way to do things, and I was like, oh, it's not actually how I like to live and how I like to teach. And at the start of the year, I sat down with my team and I just said, it's
just not feeling aligned. Yes, I want to help, and yes there was this foundation of healthy eating and moving their body, but I just want to bring everything back to balance. And when I first started, it was all about clean eating. It was all about moving our bodies, having the fun in a group environment, I'd be supported and I got lost in this comparison and trying to fit everything in and keep up with this trend and that trend and that way to eat. And this year
I just went scrap my old app. We completely put that to the size, started a whole new app that It's very very balanced, it's very simple. There's lots of variety, but it's very easy to use, and it's how I live, it's how I teach, it's how I am with my son. Like I bought it all back to what really does feel true to me, and I still have moments where I'll see someone else in doing that, I'm like, oh, we should I be teaching more about calorie counting a macro. No,
I don't want to be focused on numbers. They want to teach that pool. There's be people that want that, they can go to them, but for me, that's not for me. So I catch myself. But it is hard because it's flashed in front of your eyes all the time and you want to be succeeding and doing this
and that. But I just always bring it back to making sure I'm grounded and sticking true to what is a value to me and how I feel like I can show up to be the best person I can be for everyone that does want my help.
I think extrapolating that for outside of the fitness industry and outside of the digital world as well, I think all of us kind of do go through a really intense comparison phase where we just mimic what everyone else is doing because we feel like that's what we were lacking, and we do get lost and suddenly, if you're pleasing everyone, you're not actually pleasing anyone because not everyone's the same.
And then finally you have like this moment where you realize actually you've lost yourself entirely and you come back to like it's almost like a right of passage, like you have to kind of get lost in all of that to come back to what really matters.
It's like when you hit rock bottom. The only way up where you've got us to go up. That's the beauty and isn't it.
So the final section is Playta, where we do strip back all the layers that we have gone through. As she is a mom, Ash is a businesswoman, Ash as a trainer, like all the different us that you are, which is not to discount any of them, they all play such an important role but there has to be an ashy that isn't productive, that isn't on brand, that isn't even thinking about all of those things, And that's just playing. And when you love your job, it's like
you don't ever feel like you need that. But I think that's maybe when you need it most, because you can't be fresh and creative when you're not just doing things just for the sake it's and giggles. So what do you do for play?
Yeah? I do so much. I mean last week I had my first lesson flat boarding. Have you heard of that? It's like a surfboard that you like, it's got this machine underneath it lazy. Yeah, it goes above like a river or the beach whatever. I'm not in the waves yet. And it was actually quite a hard, hard sport to learn, but did that it was amazing. Last couple of weeks, I've bought a skateboard. I've been learning how to skate.
I'm not very good, but isn't that the thing? I feel like your playta is usually something you're comfortable with being a beginner and you don't care about getting better at.
Yeah, and I'm quite an athlete, like I've always picked up sports quite easy, so it's definitely a challenge. And a little boys really into scootering at the moment, So we're going to the skate park and we practice scootering and skateboarding. So that's fun. But I think having a barb like he'sn't above is five anymore. Having a small human you really bring out that playful side in you. And I'm definitely more cautious, like I want to be in my kneepads on my skateboard now whereas when I
was younger too. But yeah, having fun is so important, and you get older, I think we forget to have fun and I always want to keep that big kid alive inside me. Yeah, that's why I try to do new things and adventure out on the weekends and just yeah, always have fun, and I think it's so important. Otherwise you're just working to live, you know exactly.
I always say you're not here to work and die, Like that is just not the point. I mean, you could spend your whole life doing that, but that's clearly you'd be missing out on the entirety of just like
the joy and sees the ya. I actually got asked by my publisher whether I really was stuck on the word ea because they're like it's too childish, like it's really juvenile, and I was like, great, that's it exactly why I use it, because we lose that childlike sense of wonder and everything is too serious and it reminds me to just be playful and just look stupid and not care about it, like fall off a skateboard and
like who cares? You know, we don't like just throw our bodies around like idiots anymore because we're so serious and we're so prittible.
Worried about people sick, and to think or does it make us look not professional or not on brand? Yeah, one hundred percent. I agree with you got to keep that ya that play.
Do you do any dumb things like just Netflix binges or like, oh.
Yeah, oh my gosh, I love Netflix. I've gone through some series. We're actually watching Alia's at the Moment, which was filmed on Jennifer Oh fifteen years ago.
That is a blast from the past, Oh.
My god, because you know when you watch a series and then they've only got like three episodes and you have to wait for the next one. This is like seven seasons, so we are like immersed in alien's moments, So I love that switch off too. It makes me just forget about works, to get about stress, forget about everything else, and I'm just like immersed in this other world. It's just nice to relax totally.
We've gone back to the start of Hawaii fi O because there are eleven seasons.
Good one.
It was like, I don't even care what the show is about. I just know there's eleven seasons, so I'm not going to run out really quickly.
Yes, that's exactly what you were thinking. Love it.
And second last question to finish out, what are three interesting things about you that don't normally come up in conversation. And I know this is hard because you do share a lot, So give us three things we wouldn't normally hear about you.
I'm thinking your audience might not have even heard of who I am before, so they probably haven't heard this about me. But there's a couple. I am terrified of flying, like going on a plane, and if anyone wants to look at my social media, I travel at not since COVID, but before that, I travel a lot to work for pleasure interviews. I love traveling. I love traveling, but actually getting on the plane is really hard. I get massive anxiety.
I shake. There's even I filmed here like a reality series for YouTube, and there's one clip where I'm in the back and you full sea. You go into my panic attack. It is really bad. I've gotten better over the years because I've learned ways to breathe and like distract. But that's huge. I'm absolutely terrified of flying. I would rather be thrown in a pool of sharks than go in a plane accident. Like wow.
Also, you are far too humble. I feel like everyone in my audience has heard of you.
But I don't know about that.
I'm pretty sure.
The funny thing is I hate I hate avocado. I feel like everyone loves avocado, and I hate avocado.
Okay, I can't cope with that. You're in health and wellness, So.
It's just the taste, the texture, the smell, the look of it. I'm like earth, that is just not a cute. Type of that's not cute. I really don't like it. Butt You'll love me because I put frozen avocado in my smoothies because of the benefits, and I can't taste it makes it nice and thick and creamy, but I just I hate it. It's just such a gross food.
Oh my god, it is the actual best food in there. It's a staple of everything. Like, how do you even be a health and wellness person?
I know, I know, right. Everyone gets very shocked at that. And the last thing would be is I love, love, love tattoos. I think tattoos on men are just so sexy, and tattoos on women when they like tell a story, I think so cool. I have one, two, three, four, five, I have six tattoos. They're all in like places that are quite hidden, like on my wrists, in my toes, like my fingers, my angers. Yeah, little ones like you've got.
I love tattoos. I just anyone with a tattoo, I'm like, so curious on what it is, and tell me the story behind it, the art of it and the feeling of getting them done. Like I love tattoos.
Wow, would you go like a full sleep?
I would have been myself. And I really wished my husband loved them. He's the opposite of me. Hates them, hates them, and I'm like, damn it, I find them so sexy. Like always pictured myself with a man with like a full sleeve. He hates them.
Oh my god, so he doesn't even have one.
Here's two my name and Taje's name. But purely I think because of a bit of pressure for me, I'm like wotooz. He hated it. He he hates tatoos, he hates getting them done. He doesn't like them at all.
Wow, oh my gosh.
I wish he liked them and you got a full sleep, But it's not going to happen.
You can maybe get, like when technology gets better, you can get one of those like printed ones that you can just have on for like a little while and just just enjoy wear this my last question, since I love quotes so much, what's your favorite quote?
Oh? There's so many, and I love listening to your daily quotes that you put on Instagram stories. They're just so awesome. My favorite is you rows through what you go through. So I think everything that you were going through, you were going to grow through it. And that's once again, just find that lesson, find a gift, find that little pearl of wisdom that is gonna it's going to elevate
you in whatever area of your life. Everything you're growing through, everything you're going through, you're going to grow through it, and that's just I think that's such a motivation every single day that no matter what life throws at me, I'm going to grow through it and come out the side more wise and more stronger, more lessons to teach.
Oh my gosh, I think that represents you so well. That's such a good one and you've left us with so many pearls of wisdom. Everyone, you have to get your hands on Ashy's incredible new book. It's a wonderful resource for growing through what you go through. You're such an inspiration, Ashy. Thank you so much for joining.
Oh thank you for having me. I really hope everyone enjoyed it, and I always love talking to you, so thanks for having me.
If any of you walk away each week with either a new perspective on life or a new perspective on our guest, I have more than done my job and I've walked away with both today, so I hope some of you did. As always, it absolutely makes our day to hear your takeaways or reflections from these chats, so please do share this episode, tagging at Ashy Bins and myself so we can reshare. And of course don't forget there are some amazing weekly giveaways now in the Yighborhood
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We're on the home stretch now of a huge year, so I hope you're being kind to yourselves and seizing your yeay