Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya Wrath, an iHeartRadio podcast.
Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in.
Scrub dub dumb.
Oh.
I thought you were about to go to dune in California.
Loveeee. No, I wasn't gonna do that.
It's August first, you guys.
Wow, summer's flying by.
Are we gonna have a brat summer? When we was still what are we gonna have a brat summer summer?
Yeah, we should have started that back in June.
We saw a whole nother month basically, two months of summer summer?
Is that until September twenty something?
Second? But still you know school's back soon.
No, oh, my God associated summer with school.
But it's not.
Summer is a calendar. It's a biblical to my set.
Summer not biblical.
It's been the Bible.
It's in the Yes, Brat summer is not in the Bible mindset.
No, no, No, what I'm saying is summer is still summer.
For another.
We saw the two months basically of summer, and we can make it brat because that's what's cool.
Now, tell me what a brad summer is, Tonya it's like von Dutch.
It's like lime green slime, smell like sweat and cigarettes.
Yeah. It so nothing more opposite of you than that.
I know.
I mean I'm really having like a white color palette. Uh, situation happening.
For now, Like cling girl Summer, You're not really Broad Summer.
I hope I want to be Broad Summer.
You don't.
Everybody is so cool.
Brad Summer is about accepting your imperfections while embracing the chaos. That's what Charlie XCX says.
Oh really, that's not my thought.
That Ginger chan I swear I read that.
I'm like, uh, some website Glamour, can you look up what is brad Summer?
I just did.
It's literally coined it. So that's who you. That's who we're going to our info from.
On the breath.
Just like that girl who's a little messy and likes to party and maybe says dumb things, sometimes feels herself but maybe also has a breakdown, but kind of like parties through it. It's very honest, very blunt, a little volatile like those dumb things. But it's brat. You're brat. That's brat.
Yeah, that's right. That's bratt.
All right.
Well, whatever you want to be. It can be your whatever type of summer you want.
Tonya, thank you, braver. I think could be more as bridal cling girl summer, but.
I really can't. Yeah, I just did the dance. I know. It's like, I really can't help it.
It was leaving the house today and Robbie was like, you're really into the white right now.
I've worn white on white.
By the way, why are you in a puffer vest? It's ninety five degrees to.
Not inside this these are wearing.
It inside these four walls.
It's on your chair.
Thank you for reminding me because I met earlier.
It's actually insane.
Oh my gosh, now I feel nice brat summer.
It's also visually not like I know exactly like I know, it's not cool or clean.
It's like, it's not brown.
It's not clean girl. It's not barbiecore giving Melton.
It's giving an eight burbank right now. And you have a puffery vest.
That's right, what's inside inside the studio?
You weren't wearing it until five seconds.
You're not that cold.
I'm pretty chilly, not cold enough that you did that on your own accord though, right brat summer.
I do what I want, all right, you guys cigarettes.
I can't even feel like slimey with green slime. I do feel like my voice has changed ever since my sickness. I like cannot get my voice back.
You just your voice has sounded fine until this moment right now.
Yes, no, I feel like it's been like horse for two weeks.
Now, screaming brat summer. And you know my voice has been different. I did notice on earlier in the week. I noticed that earlier. This week sounds better, Yeah, sounds better today.
You know those girls that like, like I'm and they're like, I don't want to use my voice, but they love how it sounds.
Yeah, that's you. I don't mind it.
If this is the new me, then here, but totally normal.
It's just a little deeper. It's a little horser.
Think you just clear your throat and get some back.
Just sound nice for our guest.
Yeah, we do have a guest. Yeah, and I'm very excited to talk to her. We have Beckamore joining us. She is a TikTok creator. She has like a bunch of ratings on TikTok. This is kind of how she got popular rating her creepy d MS thing. She is known on TikTok for all these like funny ratings she does. So it's like rating my creepy dms that time of baseball player flew me out to meet him, Like all
these dating stories. She would like contact. If girls were like, I think my boyfriend's cheating on me, she would DM them the boy to try and catfish and she'd just be like high hi, and they'd respond and then she'd be like, oh, like you go to this college and then if you cheated, she'd expose him on TikTok.
Wow.
Yeah savage. So she also has her own podcast.
She has her own podcast and it's called for the Girls with Becca Moore, and that is because she is for the girls. She's always been for the girls. But she's really for the girls because she is dating a friend of our show and a beverage whom we love.
We had her on with Seacrest. I did not realize that until this moment.
Oh this is the girl. Yes, oh wow, Yeah, we had her on the morning show, oh.
Doing the thing where people think her boyfriends so she would each out to them. Yes, we had her on for this very reason.
Did you look up the name?
Yeah, Oh wow, it's like Ryan's Roses.
Yeah, Oh my gosh, that's so funny.
Yeah.
And then we went to a the Era's tour with her in a group with Mermaid Hair, and she was there with her friend and so we had that bonding experience as well.
And she's so cute.
And now she's back for more, and she's she's back for more with beccam Moore.
Back for more with Beca more. Let's we can't say anything else. Let's bring her.
Yeah, let's bring her in. Welcome Beckham.
We are so excited to have you. I'm so excited to be here. I love you. Guys. We went to the eras towards we were just talking about this. But back then I stay, yeah, I mean, let's jump right into it, because I feel like that.
I remember being on the bus together and you were talking about someone like up in San Francisco, and I can't remember what the thing was. He wanted you to come up there, but you didn't know if you were into him. I can't remember what the story was.
Well, we were kind of dating. We had gone on a date. We met on a dating app and I was really into him, and he was visiting La for work, and he like we had like a crazy strong connection. But then he like that was it. We went on a good date and then I was like, am I is he going to bring me to San Francisco?
Like what do I do?
And then you guys were helping me, like craft a text to be like I miss you or something, and then we did date for a couple of months, but then the distance was too hard.
Yeah, so that was what last year in August?
Yeah, yeah, that was August. And then a year ago, literally a year ago, Oh my god, that's crazy. And then I met Shannon in I think, Well we kept talking. Me and that man dated until I think like he wasn't like a backup, but we broke up. Broke up in like November, and then I met Shannon, and I remember being like I'm never gonna date a guy again. Like I was like, I like, wait, really, I don't know. I was just kidding, like I was just saying that, you know, like I don't know. I was like, I
need a break from dating. And then I met Shannon like three weeks later at the music video shoot, and I was like, maybe I'll just get a girl I don't know.
Okay, So here's my question.
Because I've listened to your podcast, I've heard the story of how you met Shannon. But I want you to go through that day again and meeting Shannon, and then I have some follow up questions. Okay, inspector gadget over here.
So I met her at the music video shoot, and she like wouldn't give me the time of day. I had never liked a girl before, like I've never I mean a music video shoot. It was for Zolita, her song Oh my God, Queen of It's Queen of Hearts or something.
Okay, Okayla is Shannon's roommate.
Yeah, okay, but I didn't know this. So I show up and all of a sudden, I was attracted to Shannon. I was really confused. So I was like, what the hell is going on? And she like wouldn't make eye contact with me, like I couldn't get her attention. I was like, what do I do? So then she comes over to us and she was like she was a creative director and she was like, hi, guys, has anyone
here been in a music video before? And I was like, oh my god, I have, and I was trying to like let her know that, like I was like in with the lesbians, Like I wanted her to think that I like knew leslians. So I was like, I, actually it was in this LGBT music video with Fletcher. I don't know if you did you know that? D No, I didn't know anything. I don't know. I'm so mad at myself realized it's so bad. Do you know this story, Becca or no?
I just saw your TikTok about this.
I just finally told the story last night because I've been like omitting that part of the story because it's embarrassing. But it's not embarrassing if you didn't know. Yeah, I literally did not know. What are the odds of me bringing up Fletcher with Shannon Beverage in our first sentence? Finally I got her attention to so everything was like riding on this one like interaction, and I messed it up somehow. I was like, yeah, I was in Fletcher's music video. She was so cool, she was so awesome.
It was so fun hanging out with her all day. And then she like let me talk for a while, she like let me go on with my story, and I thought she was like really into it. But then she was like, so that is my ex girlfriend and we I don't even know. So then I was like, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. And then she didn't talk to me for the rest of the day and
I got to get her attention. I kept going up to her and being like, I'm so sorry, so sorry, and she kept being like, it's fine and I don't care that much, like it seems like you really care, and she thought, okay, So that made her think I was straight because I didn't know their like lore, like I didn't know, Yeah.
That is pretty straight though not knowing about I.
Didn't know anything. I so I googled her in the back because I started telling everyone what I had just done, not the shoot, and they were like, that is Shannon Bedbridge.
I don't know if Shannon Beverage is. And I googled her in the bathroom and then I found out and I felt terrible and I decided I was in love with her from like her social media, like I thought she was so hot and it made me want her even more that like she didn't like me that day at all, so but she thought she just thought it was straight, like she didn't know and then yeah, and then I messaged her. I was like, I think got because she posted this is after then after this ship. Yeah,
it hadn't talked. I mean she like came up to me and like asked me a question, but it was like pointless, like it was not flirty.
And was she flirty or giving attention to anybody else on set or was she just very much she was just like.
In her own zone, except I saw her on Rya, Like I saw over her shoulder that she was on ride, so I knew she was single, so I thought I would could get in, you know, so I down't well already had Rya, but I changed my Riya to girls literally that day, and I started looking for her. And I would run out of swipes every single day looking for Shannon. But it turns out her like age limit was set to twenty seven and I'm twenty six. Oh,
so I was never gonna find her. Yeah you cross that literally ever so but then I she posted a Q and A on her Instagram a few days later and it was like, asked me questions about relationships for my podcast, So I asked. I was like, I'm going to say, what do I do if I think I'm in love with you, which I thought was funny, like obviously I'm not actually in love with her, but she didn't answer it.
So I was like, this girlings I'm crazy, like crazy, I bring up her ex girlfriend and then I told her I was in love with her, and then she didn't answer, and so then I gave up because it was like she obviously doesn't like she's creeped out by me, like that was weird of me, like everything I did.
And then my manager butt dialed her. My manager knew her because my manager had managed her like years before, and she told me after because I was telling everyone like in my life, I was like, guys, I like a girl. Now it's this girl. And then my manager was like, oh my god, I used to manage Shannon, and I was like, oh my god, you're so lucky. Tell her I'm in love with her. She's like, I'm
never going to see her again. But she butt dialed her like a week later, like my manager randomly butt dialed Shannon, which is crazy, like I feel like it's the universe helping me out. But she was like, oh my god, I was trying to call my dad can but do you know Becka more Chan was like, yeah, I met that girl at the shoe and she was like, well, Becka is like in love with you, like she keeps
talking about you. And she was like what like she swore to god, she did not see my DM like she swears, So I don't know if I believe her in the question box thing, Yeah, she see it. So then she DMed me, well, was she following you? Yeah? Because I followed. She was the only one I followed from the shoe, so she should have known.
Because the thing is, when when I like people that I follow like show up, it shows about the top.
So I don't really know if I believe her. I feel I know, I feel like she was just like trying to make me feel better. So but then she DMed me and then I got scared. I was like, okay, now it feels like too serious. So I didn't answer for a week and then I finally answered her.
What did she DM you?
She just replied to like one of my stories. It was like you have like just like joking about something I posted. But I was like I don't know now, like I don't know if I want to come talk to a girl because I felt like I finally got her, you know, and I was like.
Yeah, well, I was gonna ask if you if that's how you dated guys, like if if it was like if you got there like you liked the chase, and then as soon as you got their attention where you kind of like okay.
Yeah, I think I'm kind of like avoidant, like I got interesting. Yeah, very avoidant. I love I mean just getting into my like mental self. I don't know, but like I think, yeah, once I have someone, but then like she's so sweet that it like won me over, and I'm like, now I feel more secure in our relationship.
But like, definitely in the beginning, I was like kind of playing a little bit, like I was like, I don't know if I really like her, so I'm just gonna like talk to her for I would like say, I'm just gonna like reply to this one, and then she would say something funny and then I'd like, fine, I'll reply to one more. And then she obviously won
me over and I love her now. So yeah, I think because I don't think I could like fathom the fact that I actually had romantic feel like I really liked a girl and I wasn't just like being fun, Like I don't know what I thought in the beginning.
Did you ever have any Cause when I look back, I never had romantic feelings like I had.
For Haley before.
But I look back on certain things and I'm like, oh, maybe that was a crush on a girl, or like maybe that was like a crush, but I just I I.
What's the word I'm looking for? Like excuse it? Almost as like, oh, I just have like a girl crush, but not if that makes sense.
Do you have any of those? Or was oh, okay, you do well? Shannon was definitely the first one that I was like, Okay, I want to be like physical too.
Yes, but I.
Definitely had like codependent friendship where like we were like I would get we would get mad at each other if we had a boyfriend, like we hated each other's boyfriends and we had to hang out. Like I remember like crying one time on Valentine's Day because of my best friend Kenzie, like she wanted to hang out with her boyfriend and not me, And I'm like, that's not straight.
I think that's not normal. But but also but also like I think it's hard for me to even like admit that right now, because I'm like, I don't want anyone in my life, like previously, to think that I don't want any of my friends to think that I was like in love with them, you know, because I
don't think I was. I wasn't attracted to like really feminine girls, but like Shannon is the type of girl that I would have gone for if I had met one like her sooner because I lived in Ohio in Nashville my whole life, so I wasn't around a lot of lesbians or lesbians that were out.
But yeah, I know.
And I think Shannon that's why Shannon became so loved in the community is because I think girls saw her and all of a sudden, like I both my younger sisters are gay, and they were both like Shannon was such a like made me think, oh I could be gay and I could like someone that isn't you know, like if I think they saw themselves in her and they were like, oh, that could be me, And I think she had that a lot of people had that
experience because of Shannon. And I think that it's so funny that you went, like to that video shoot, which was predominantly.
Yeah, I like, you only know this girl.
I had no idea. Well, I because my tagline on TikTok was like for the girls, not the guys. So they asked me to be in it just because just like say that tagline and be like for the girls, not the guys. And I didn't realize that I was the only like straight one. Yeah, I thought I was straight. So I think all those girls kind of helped me too throughout the day because they were like, if you like Shannon, because all day I was like, how do
I get Shannon like me? Guys And they're like, you know you're by right, like you're definitely bisexual, and I was like, no, no, no, I'm not. You guys are
I'm not? Because I got like it was just fun like I thought I was joking, Yeah, but I wasn't joking now looking at but yeah, she but Shannon does have that effect on people, like I feel like you can see yourself in Shannon because she's so girl next door and she like she's not what you think of when you think of like a stereotypical like I don't know, like definitely is going on stereotyps, but like they're you
just I don't know. I think there needs me more representation because she looks so like she could be anyone like your sister, like your fat I don't know. She looks like, I guess a normal girl and not so Lesbians aren't normal, you know what I mean.
There's a stereotype, there's a stereotyper, and I think there's people it's like based on how you present. And sometimes if you saw something your whole life that represented what a lesbian is, you're like, oh, I'm not necessarily tracked to that. And then you see someone like Shannon who's kind of rides that line of femuline femalin, feminine and.
Masculine, kind of good femuline femulin, and it kind of makes you go like, Okay, I get I could be there.
I think I am into girls.
Yeah, it was hard though, being like am I just do I actually like her? Or do I just like her as a friend. It's like that thing again where I'm like, am I obsessed with Kenzie the girl that I was best friends with? Or do I like like her? Like I don't know. But then I kind of just had to like be like, well, do I want to keep do I want to make out with her, Yes, obviously I want to make out with her. Then I like her, you know. Yeah, it was just hard to come to terms with that. When I grew up also
was just scared of like what people. I kept it a secret even from my family for like six months.
Oh wow, six months? What about your friends who knew about it?
Only my LA friends knew because I obviously was bringing her around and like telling them. I mean, I broke the news in all my groups with my friends being like, guys, I like a girl like that day, and I because I was just so embarrassed about the story that had just had, like the Fletcher thing, So I obviously texted all of them because I needed their like I wanted
them to make me feel better. And I never like came out to like my friends really like I just kind of was like, guys, I like this girl and she's so hot. And then all my friends were, even my O high friends are all like ha ha, Becca, you need to like redeem your like no one, they weren't taking me seriously in the beginning because it was like a joke kind of and then as time went on, it was just kind of like a slow. They were like, okay, yeah,
Becca likes this girl. Once we me and Shannon started dating, they were very easy to come out to my family. I kind of did have to do like the sit down, and I like surprised them. They thought I was like pregnant or something because I was crying when I told them. I was like, oh, I could tell you something. And it was a little bit more dramatic than my friends.
But yeah, it took me a long time. Even though I thought that like coming out would be like so lighthearted now like on the internet, I mean, that was a different story. But I thought that it would be really lighthearted and like everyone would be like who cares, it's twenty twenty four. But then I did it, and like it's a lot more permanent than I thought, Like I think, what is that? What do you mean permanent?
Like it feels like I'm just scared that everyone will think that I went crazy and like I'm wearing a scarlet letter. Yeah that's how I feel, But I don't know. I had to like, oh that, like it's just been like a crazy week or two weeks of people being like sometimes I'm just getting like weird dms that are like I don't know that are like Bible stuff. Oh yeah, I don't know.
Yeah, yeah, I get a lot of those two.
Yeah. Wait, what was it like when you came out? Was it?
Well? I think we work together for four years, so I had a lot of time to like really prepare and process, you know what.
Yeah, that's what to expect.
In terms of the response from like public. But all my friends knew basically the day after I kissed her.
Yeah, they all, I told them all.
Yeah.
I was just like, my sisters lived with me, which that was nice because I had I knew I had their support. But I come from a very like Southern Christian background, so.
The family part was really hard and challenging.
And then I was just like not ready to have it be public, and I wasn't prepared to deal with getting d MS about the Bible and what you know. I just like wasn't ready for that. And so when we came out, I was totally prepared.
So I was.
Ready for anything and everything. And I was also I knew I had my support system. Everyone knew, and I was just kind of ready to not have to because we talked, we talked about me being in a relationship on the podcast, but we never said pronouns and it was so hard.
So four years were like, and what are you doing this weekend? Are you in said person? Going to dinner?
Yeah?
Why did people kind of know?
Or was it?
Yeah? People knew and they were so wonderful because everyone let me do it my own time.
You know.
There was and then if we if we Haley and I were out and I met someone like who listened to the podcast, I would inter I'd be like, this is my girlfriend Haley. I never hit her in that way because I never wanted it to be I never wanted her to feel hidden. It was just private. I wasn't ready, so it was I don't I get what you're saying. But I didn't do it as fast as you did, so I had a lot more time to kind of prep myself. And I think that I know
what you're talking about the permanence of it. And then people would be like, I didn't know you were a lesbian, and I'm like, well, I don't really identify as a lesbian.
But that's what I meant when I said the permanent thing. I'm like, I don't want people to like I still had relationships with guys in the past, and I think I don't want like people to think that, like I never liked any guy that right, right, Like I'm definitely by which right? Like do you feel like now?
Like people say like, oh, you're bisexual, and then but you're like, well maybe I'm maybe I'm fully lesbian, maybe I'm st like you just don't know.
I know, I don't even think what when people like I don't even think I fit into like bisex, so I just feel like I just like a girl, Like I feel like, I mean, obviously I am technically bisexual, but like that makes it feel like half and half, Like I don't know, I feel like going back and forth, you know where I'm like, I don't know what my sexuality is like and why I do I have to have you know.
You really don't.
And I think for some people the label so important because they live with it for so long that being able to say, like I'm a lesbian or I'm bisexual feels like freeing. And I think I felt the same way as you, as like I don't like being put in a box. I don't want to have to label
myself or give an answer to this. But because what I was like in my mind, I'm like, I fell in love with Haley, and that's what I know that you know, I know, I know that I'm attracted to men, But like, will I want to date a man again if Haley and I don't work out, I don't know. But that's not even in my focus right now because I fell in love with Haley and that's who I'm with.
So I I totally wit this whole.
Thing that you're going through. And now I kind of just I don't care, like say whatever you want. I'm in love with this person and that's what it is. Yeah.
People keep asking me, so when you guys break up, they'll say, like, when you guys break up, you're going to go back to men, And I'm like what, And we're dating and currently we are dating like we love each other. Yeah, I'm not thinking about like who I'm going to date next, right, I don't know, Like and she even asked me that too, She's like, are you going to date girls like forever now? And I was like, wait, what, we're literally dating?
Shit?
Why I hope?
I know.
It's it's a It's interesting because I think when you like, if someone is presumed and you yourself, presume that you're straight forever, and then you fall in love with someone and it's different than what people expected from you. They like need an answer about that, and you don't owe them that, you know, And I think that you being able to fall in love with a girl and process it, and also it's still pretty new for you and like to be able to process it and you're kind of doing it in real time.
With people, it's going to be really helpful for a lot of people.
And I also think that it's hard and to like give yourself grace because I don't think it's I don't think it's a I know, it's easy to be like it's twenty twenty four, it's not a big deal anymore. Everyone's you know, people should be comfortable, and they should. But I think as a personal thing, it is such a big deal, and it's such a big deal that you are public with it.
So I hope you feel really proud of yourself.
Because it's so see I do.
I think that it's a big deal and you did it way faster than I did.
But you really were like one of the people that paved the way for me. Like I thought, like, oh my god, I'm not kidding you were. I loved watching your story. Obviously, I watched both of your seasons as
the Bachelor. I loved it, and then watching like I kind of like saw at first of all, you have the same name, but like I did like see myself and you, and especially coming from I mean, my family isn't conservative, but like I came from Ohio and then I lived in Nashville, So yeah, I think that like if I had more representation like you, Like I was really excited when I saw you come out, and I don't think I knew why. Maybe I should have known why, Like maybe I knew deep down like I could be
attracted to girls. But I do think that the more people that do just like fall in love with the same sex and like just tell everyone and they didn't expect it, but it's whatever. I think that will help a lot more people, because I think the world is just more fun if you don't like put yourself in a box of like, oh I'm straight, I can only date this gender, you know, Like I feel like what if you just like what such?
Like it's so it's so crazy to me that you get asked these questions and it's like if somebody dm me and was like if you and Robbie don't work out, like who are you gonna date next?
Normal? Like go kick rocks? Like what are you talking about?
Like straight people don't have to do that, yea, stuff like that.
I don't know, and there's so much pressure on like oh my god, Like I'm.
Like why, Like I like they like asking you like are you gonna have kids?
Like yeah, like how are you gonna have?
Yeah?
I'm like I'm literally twenty six. I don't know. I feel like I'm I'm seventeen. I have idea. All I know is I love her and who cares?
Why is it?
Like?
Also, I do feel like a certain like not to call my family and some of my old old friends out, but like I do feel a little bit of coldness from like certain members of my family, and that is kind of that has been painful. But then when I think about it, like a bird's eye but also okay, I'm like backshocking, but I do kind of have to give them grace because it took me a long time to like forgive myself and be like okay, fine, I'm
going to dat a girl. So that's been hard. You don't have to forget, Like it's not about them forgiving you. I feel like it's them.
Yeah, you're right, I know, forgive, but it's not even it's like them, not no, it's like them whatever it is. I don't know what it is for them, but maybe it's something they've been taught or been told forever forever, so they're like processing and unlearning. And I think at the end of the day, it's like you do just have to give people like a little bit of time and grace because yeah, if they love you like that will come through.
That will we shine through? Do you know what I mean?
And as long as they're not like hopefully nobody is being negative or.
No texting me like yeah, text or anything, but like, yeah, I do. I just I guess I just want everyone my message to be like I'm happy, like I want everything happy for me, And this could happen to you too, me like threatening.
If you guys look really hot.
Has your family met her? Yeah?
No?
Wait, why did I say they face timed her? But okay, yeah, my mom is like obsessed, like she's like, oh my god, am my sisters too. But I met her entire family and that was so fun. They were so sweet.
So y'all meet at the video.
Shoot y'all, Damn, whois the first thing out?
She asked me on a date, okay, and that's when we went to drinks and I freakimmed a little bit too her. I like had two glasses of wine before. Yeah, you have to.
I was so nervous I ever went to a date sober, I know, but imagine the first one with a girl like.
I'm just terribot. I showed up though, and like she says that, I was like shaking, like shaking really hard, and I don't remember that. I'm like, why did that doesn't sound like no. She didn't tell me until like weeks later, thank god. But yeah, we sat down and I knew right away. I was like, I need to make you my girlfriend, Like I need you, Like she looked so cute and she was like so she's just
like charming, like she was so friendly. And then after that that's pretty much like I think before was the harder part, like getting me to work up the courage. She'd be like, Okay, I'm actually going on this date and like I'm actually gonna take this seriously as a possibility for someone that I'm going to date, because when she asked me on a date, the avoidant thing came up again where I was like, I'm just gonna be kind of like avoid of this girl, Like I'm not
going to text her ato like six pm every day. Why, I don't know. I think that was six pm.
I don't like the morning spot that happens after six pm.
Okay, Okay, maybe that I don't know. I just like remember like I would not text her. Yeah, I guess I thought that I was like.
Eleven, that's dangerous territory, but six pm grabs at her early brit special at six pm.
I think I thought that story would like land Alge. I thought you guys be like, wow, so bad. But it felt like I felt she was as a girl like and she would text me at night and and I wouldn't answer for a while six pm until six It was crazy. But yeah, but how long did that last?
Though?
That was like because I was in Ohio. It was like over Christmas? Okay, so because we met December third, okay, and then we went on our first date January seventh. Oh so so we talked a lot before you went out. Well, I remember like PM, Well, the first, she didn't talk to me for like a week after the shoot, and then I didn't talked to her for like a week, So it took like a couple of weeks in between because I stalked her old like YouTube videos.
But like that's like a long time of like I feel like, you know, when you're talking to somebody on like a dating app, I always wanted to meet them right away because it's like there's only so much you can talk to someone before you like go on your first date.
I know. But we had so much to talk about because like I was watching all of her YouTube videos. Most you would ask her questions, did she did you tell her?
Well?
I did. The day I finally replied to her DM, I just sent her screenshot of like one of her old YouTube videos, and I said, why am I watching this right now? Haha? But really I was just watching those to see if like I should answer her, like to see if I was like for real about liking her,
Like I wanted to like do a deep dive. So I watch like all of her stuff, and then I pretended like that was the only one I watched obviously, but I watch every single one, and yeah, then we started we kept texting for a couple of weeks, but yeah, we were texting every day for like two weeks before finally we gone on this date. So we had a lot to talk about on our date, and then after that we spent like every day together like forever. Okay.
So once Chill met, it was pretty much like it was.
Like she was like trying to be like slow down, like no, not really like it was not like I was trying to like date or tomorrow, but she kept being like I can't have a girlfriend right now. I she got to have a relationship, and I was like, oh my god, it's totally fine. I don't even care. And then we did stop talking for twelve hours because we kept hating. Okay, we kept out, I'm not kidding.
It was so short. She tried to like okay, so we were hanging out every day, and then I think she realized that things are kind of probably going to get serious. So on our like third date, she like was like I just want let you know, like I can't have a girlfriend, Like I like you a lot, but like we can't date, and I was like, oh my god. So then I cried and then I was like, well then I don't want to talk like I want to date you. Yeah, and she was like, good for you.
I know I did stand my ground. Yeah, I said I want to date like I see a future with you. So if you don't see that, then I guess we can't be together. And then she said, what about in like six months, Like what if I go to therapy and like figure my life out? What about in six months? And I was like, I mean, I can't promise that I'm going to be single in six months, but yeah, I'm probably still gonna like you six months from now. I don't really know. And then she left. She was like, Okay,
I respect you. I understand that you don't want anything casual, so let's not talk for a while. And I was like okay, And then like twelve hours later she texted me. She was like I miss you, and then I came over to her house and then that's when we like for real decided to like start talking talking. You know, So when.
Did y'all become a like did you did y'all have like a will you be my girlfriend? Moment?
Yeah?
She asked me. In May. On May third, she was like, she took me to Joshua tree and we like had an airbnb and we were like walking around. But on the first night, she like made my favorite dinner for me, and then we were playing this card game and she played like all of a sudden, the song that we first like I think made Out Too came on on the radio or on the speaker, and I was like, oh my god, Shannon, this is a song. And then
she was like, I have a present for you. And then she gave me a necklace and I said S and B and she was like, will you be my girlfriend? And I said, obviously, we're already dating, like we had been an exclusive.
H that's a long time. R April month, Yeah, April to August. Where came where there was like my girlfriend.
April to May to June, July four months. Yeah, it's way too long.
But I didn't know that.
I was.
I was like, I'm new to this.
If you were waiting for me to ask you to be your girlfriend, I've never done that before, So.
Yeah, I wasn't gonna ask her. But I had heard that like WLW relationships. I wanted to say Lassie, but and then I was like, I don't know if everyone's lasting, they go move fast. So I know that she's gonna ask me right away, and I feel like if a guy were waiting four months to ask me to be his girlfriend, I would have complained. So I did start like being like, isn't like I made tiny jokes about it,
but I wanted to be like chill. But then I like was telling my friends like, if she doesn't ask me this weekend, I'm going to bring it up, like for sure, I'm gonna be like, dude, I thought we were gonna be together. What are we doing right now?
But she asked me what was the makeout song?
It was hopeless romantic by Julia. It's like, it's a really good song. It's like, I don't know if you know not Julia prap, don't know. I've listened to it this morning. It's really good. You guys would listen to it. Okay, who kissed you first? She asked if she could kiss me when the.
Night you all hung out for the first time.
Oh yeah, we definitely made out, she said. I made out though, like a like a girl making out with a guy. So we kind of had to fix her kissing sounds of.
What I just had this conversation because of love Island because I was like.
Do you Watu Island? I'm trying to I'm on an episode. I'm really behind, but I'm watching kids.
It's it's a hard watch for me.
It was a hard watch.
No, it's good, but the girl the way the girls kissed the guys was so jarring to me because it's so aggressive.
Yeah, oh okay, I wasn't being agressive, she said I was being too like like submit, like letting her all the work. And I was like, oh oops, what am I supposed to work? Am I supposed to cook?
In? Like?
What did I do?
I don't know? But then we figured it out, got that settled. The first kiss, I was like, yeah, I was a little bit. I wasn't used to. I've never I've only made out with a girl one time in the bathroom of in a bathroom stall. But it wasn't like I think we're being performative.
Giving acting.
Yeah, it was just it was weird.
Did you feel I'm curious from okay, what was the longest relationship you had with a guy?
It was not very long. I was like, the longest one I dated was less than a year. It was like nine months. But we were breaking up every other week, like terrible, terrible.
So is this your most like consistent oh relationship?
Oh my god. Yeah, And we are like way more connected than I've ever been with a guy, Like I can tell her literally anything, like I'm not worried about like being cute all the time. Like I feel just
so more myself and like comfortable and happy. So it's like maybe I'm like I don't know, I don't know if I could go back to dating men that's like the same type of men at least, because I was going for like athletic guys like just super I don't I think I was just trying to like get like I don't know, the guy that yeah, the guy that like everyone wanted and I just wanted to compete the challenge. Yeah, I don't know.
Did you have IX with guys like really easily, Like would you get like what were some of the simple icks that that Okay, So my whole thing was I realized when I started dating Haley the things that she that would normally give me the ick, I don't even have a thing, Like I know she doesn't it me at all.
There's nothing that Shannon could do that would like gave me the ick and not want to talk to her anymore. I want to first state with a guy and his car alarm went off and I couldn't talk to him anymore. I'm not kidding because he was just so awkward around the car alarm thing, like he was like embarrassed. That's so good.
So he got embarrassed and that was Yes.
It was like icky because he couldn't like recover from it. He couldn't be cool about it went up because he had to call his dad to figure out.
What something else.
This one guy like to watch South Park. I feel so bad, but I hate south Park. I couldn't This other guy, my boyfriend, the guy that I like kept breaking up with. He had these like as tech print like pillowcases, but like cheap as tech print, like from Amazon for like a dollar, And I'm so sorry. I literally posted on my Snapchat story, like on my private one, and I was like, I don't know how to end things like them. He's my literal boyfriend. It's just so bad.
So if Shannon had like full ass tech decory, I love that.
She wouldn't have, yeah, but I would be like, this is so hot. Shannon's like a girl though she doesn't do anything itchy, you know, I don't know.
I love that before you fell in love with the girl, you were so for the girls.
I know it's funny that that was my literal tagline, and now look at me.
Now, I wonder, well, why was that your tagline? Because I would like list things that weren't for men, like silverware and like air. I should have known, though.
What those were some of my favorite lists.
Could you share with some of our listeners who maybe haven't seen the videos some things that are for the girls.
It would be like lowercase letters, shelter, blanket shelter. How was shelter for the girls? Why do they need that? They're fun? And yeah they I think that I had like a bar like men should be like barbarians if they're going to be in society because I don't know, like they don't even need to know how to read. We're good, we don't need them. I should have known them though that because also like I don't actually know where I was going with that thought.
It was really confident, fascinated that you ended up into LGBTQ artists music videos.
The first one was an accident. It was I was friends with Olivia O'Brien and her and Fletcher did like a collapse on together, and Olivia asked me like the night before because she just needed Fletcher needed like a girl to like sit on a bench with her and like predomin to kiss her, which is awkward, but we didn't actually kiss, Like I didn't. I don't know. That was my first time meeting.
No.
I met Olivia like the day before and it was just really last minute, wasn't planned, and I just showed up. I didn't know what I was going to be doing. All I knew was that I was Fletcher's like love and chirst and I just sat there. Yeah, it was really quick. It was like a second.
You and Shandon were together when they did their podcast together when Fletcher was on.
How was that for you?
It wasn't. I know, everyone probably wants me to be like it was so hard and likes so much, Like I don't have that much tea about it because I felt I just felt so like secure in my relationship with Shannon, like I knew we were already exclusive at that point, and I think that like knowing kind of the people in real life, like I understand that it is their relationship is like representation for so many people,
and it was like iconic. It's like an iconic relationship, and so I definitely want to respect that, like it should be in a museum. Like that's it, though, Like I think it's over, you know, Like I wasn't. I was just really secure with her because I I don't know, she made me feel so comfortable and like we hung out after, like me and Shannon hung out after that was like recorded, so it was fine. I don't know, I don't know, well, yeah, because.
That's like so nice because I feel like that's like I feel like everybody, no matter how confident and secure you are, you have insecurities, Like everybody just has them. And I feel like you're what you're saying is like my relationship my girlfriend made has made me feel so secure that even for doing an interview with her ex girlfriend, that people lore I don't even know what they are, and that you can can just be like it was like she was doing her job, do you know what I mean?
Like she was like working, they were working together, like both of them, Yeah, they were working.
But just to have that just goes to show like how strong your relationship is.
Feeling. I feel like she's like my best friend, and I don't think that she would do anything to like ever make me feel unomfortable, like even I mean when I watched it, I was like, I do feel like they kind of just watched it. Oh yeah, would you not watch it? No, I don't think I could. Would I would?
Yeah, for sure, you think I would.
You'd watch it over and over again and analyze every single Seaylor, Yes, Okay.
Well, I think that like I knew that it was just like kind of a job that they were doing, like you said, like I didn't think. I just I just know Shannon and life and I know Carrie, So it's like I think, I just I just know than like one hundred percent, like I know that it's there. You know. I don't want to like ruin anyone's day though, because I understand I know that feeling like when you want two people to get back together so bad, or
like you ship people in your head so bad. So I I think I want to respect that and like let people have their fun, Like that's very kind.
Of very generous, very generous giver.
Becca. Well, I don't know, I feel like it's like no.
I'd favor I'd be like she's mine now lore us shook us ship us.
I just don't care because it's not real. It's like Twitter. So but I mean it was annoying honestly. I will say though, the day that it did come out, I was getting like a lot of like hate comments, being like I want her to be with Carrie. That was the only annoying part because I was like, oh my god, why don't you guys like me? Like why do you like her better? Why does everyone like want? I don't know, it was more just my ego. I was like, when you guys to like me too, I'm not that bad.
But yeah, that part sucked for like two hours, and then I beca more energy Yeah you don't, Yeah I do. But I was just with her the entire time, Like it's hard.
To be like, I know what you say makes sense, yeah, but it's like I just feel in real life it's like, well, you.
Know what, I honestly think if it were a man, there's no way, Like I would not know why.
But so that's so interesting. Why what's the difference, Like, because.
I feel like we're best friend, We're literally like I just feel so close to her, like she wouldn't do anything to hurt me, you know. Yeah, but you're saying if it was a guy doing an interview with I would feel different. It's not interesting, Yeah.
Like scrutinizing body language.
What me, No, I'm saying.
Sitting, I'm saying, if there was a guy, you'd be like scrutinizing.
Watching it over and over, somo being like why did you do that?
Yeah?
So interesting. Well, she also like, I've never dated someone in the public eye, so I understand, like their life is like kind of on display for everyone, and they're trying to like be enter, they're trying to entertain, They're doing their job to like make you and I mean Carrie had an album to promote. Yeah, yeah, everyone knew what they're doing, right, Yeah, I understand. And a lot of her songs are about Shannon, like not this album, but like they are they have been about Shannon in
the past. So yeah, obviously it's entertaining to like imagine if Taylor Swift did an interview with like Harry Styles, I would watch that too. But I understand that they're probably never going to get back together. I wish, so I really do wish that they would get back together. I don't know.
We started.
Yeah, I was with Shannon over the weekend at a party and it was so yeah at that beach party.
Oh yeah, okay, we were spike ball partners.
I heard about this.
Yeah, I was very sore and she said she needed a wheelchair. But she it was so fun to talk to her about you because she just speaks so highly of you, and like the happiness radiating.
From her was so like, we just had such a great day.
And I remember thinking we left and I was telling my sister and her girlfriend. I was like, Shane, then's so happy, Like it was so fun to be around her and her talking about Becca.
I feel like we're just a good fit. Like I feel like we understand each other, and like she balances me out. I feel like I'm super adhd and like chaotic and like I'll be like do we should do that? And that, and then she's really calm and like keeps me together. And also I've never had a relationship like thisuess where i feel like we're like almost like puzzle pieces,
like fitting together kind of. Yeah, and like she sees she understands everything that like sometimes I'll say something to her and I'll be like, why do I feel this way about like something random, like any like issue in my life, and it's almost like dating a therapist because she like connects dots for me. She's like, well, remember the story you told me, Like I don't know, it is like dating a therapist. It's so nice, Like she's just so balanced, I feel, and she never gets worked
up like I never. I feel like with a lot of men in my past, like I just feel like I wasn't ever understood and it was never like I was kind of there's like a wall between us and we couldn't get on the same page. And I feel like it's because I was trying. It might have been
the type of mine. How shosing now, because I really was going for like the stereotypical like I don't even know, like popular guy, and I feel like they I was just trying to get them to see me as like human, like trying to get them to like view me as like someone important, like someone important to like make myself
important to them. But with Shannon, I'm already like she inherently and like important to her, so like I don't need to do I don't need to prove myself to Shannon, like I don't need to be like, guess what, I'm a girl, and also I'm smart, and also I have feelings, Like Shannon already understands all of that, and that makes our relationship like way easier because we're on the same page.
Like all the time, she told me how smart you are, like she's so smart and she's so good at games, because I was like, y'all should come over for games, and she like, Becca's so good at games.
She's so smart.
No, not that good a game. She's not supposed to tell people that because then I can like shock them.
Oh yeah, I was, she forgot I said anything.
I know we've talked about a lot about your relationship, but I'm so curious how your career got started as an influencer, because did did you start doing tiktoks with the plan of this becoming your career or did it happen accidentally.
It was an accident. I've always like had a pretty sarcastic sense of humor, So the first video I've made was me like rating my date party dates sarcastically, like saying, this guy left with another girl when he took me ten out of ten. And that video was really meant for my friends or like people that I knew or knew those guys, but it went viral, like the first video I ever made. So then I kept going. I was like, oh my god, I have so many men that I can make fun of, and just kept going
on and on. Yeah, and that's kind of where the brand, like for the girls, not the guys, because everyone would be like I would never like yeah, I would only like talk shit about men. H That's when I like started to take That's when my brand started. Yeah, back in like twenty twenty one.
So, and then you had a series where you would basically reach out to guys who were in relationships.
What was it called the loyalty test?
I to do test? Yeah?
Did that was that hard for you to like deliver that news to girls?
Yes? Obviously it was terrible. I would send them screenshots. I started that because this girl wanted me to DM her, like a girl organically asked me for that, like one day, like she was like, Hi, this is so random, but like my boyfriend loves blonde girls. Will you DM him? And I was like what the heck? Yeah, obviously, and I sent her screenshots and he failed the loyalty test.
So then I was telling a story to my friends, which means like he failed, which means like he like was flirting idea and was kind of being flirty and I showed her and I was really sad and emotional and it was hard for her. But I was telling my friends the story and they were like, you should make that into a TikTok, and I was like, I guess, and then I started doing, but then it got way too overwhelming, you guys, like I was doing like inundated.
What does that word mean, like like flooded with girls wanting you to act still every day still, and I haven't done one in probably two years. Yeah, I have not done a single one of these and two years and every I get asked about it every single day in my DMS. So maybe I should just starting it. But everyone knows I'm dating a girl.
Now.
I feel like you can just go into my profile and see that I'm not single, So why would I be sligning in anywaybe.
Then like a secret.
Yeah, I can make a fence to maybe with like random pictures, but yeah, I just these boyfriends, and a lot of them, it wasn't like one hundred percent of them were failing it was like, like you say the percentage like forty percent, I would say failed. Oh so the higher percentage just didn't fail. M oh nice.
So it's just not crazy, not seene.
Yeah, so I don't know if they this.
Is great, great they're not checking. That means they're not checking. Yeah, yeah, that's good news.
I'm happy about that percentage. Yeah, would that be crazy if like I mean, I don't know. I might be under exaggerating, but that would be crazy if like eighty I would literally like never want a date again if it was like eighty percent. It honestly did make me a little bit jaded towards dating for a while doing that.
Yeah, I can imagine.
How are any of you feeling this? Like, yeah, so sad? Yeah, I don't know.
I know that's really I was thinking.
Because sometimes we'll get advice things on our emails and it'll be like, oh, I know so and so's cheating, Like do I do I say something? And Tanya and Mark are always like, stay out of it, it's not your relationship.
But I'm like you, guys, no, I don't say stay out of it. I'm like, get in it. Yeah, get let them know. Yeah, because it would suck, Like, how else are you gonna what if they never find out and then they get married or something. Yeah, I just feel like they find out, I find out. I don't, or I guess sometimes in some cases, people kind of don't want to know if their partner is shooting. Like that's the thing.
It's like it's like, let's say you meddle and then you tell them and then they do nothing about it, and then.
Yeah, but still a bad guy for letting them know they're being cheated on, because you're like being judgmental, like you're not interjecting yourself into these people's relationship, and then you're like you're not gonna do anything about it.
Well, imagine that's where you just got to look at you.
It's all but imagine like knowing that other people knew and then you if you genuinely didn't know.
I would be mad at my friend, so.
Mad if someone knew and didn't tell me. If anyone knows that Haley's doing anything, you have permission to meddle.
Get in noted.
Yeah, especially you, especially you beca Thank you so much for scrubbing in.
Yeah, thank you so much.
I love Where can people follow you?
Where can people listen to your podcast, watch your podcast, all the things it is called.
My podcast is called for the Girls with Becca more I'm five episodes in, so don't expect to love. I'm honest. It's like pretty chaotic. It's on YouTube and Spotify and then my TikTok and Instagram is just Becca more Perfect.
We love so much.
It's so happy for you.
This is like therapy. This is awesome talking to you guys. I love that.
Actually