A Table Too Far

Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya rap An iHeartRadio podcast.

Hello everybody, we are scrubbing in, scrub a dub dumb. Today is a great day, a great day to have a great day.

It's a great day to have a great day. How you doing doing great? Feels so good that I've seen you.

Like just been with you three times this week.

Yeah, it's nice.

Yeah, that's what you've been needing.

It's what I've it is what I've been needing.

I do have a question though, Oh so we got to dinner last night.

Uh, we get seated at a like a very traditional two table, I mean two person table, you know, like it's just enough room on each side for each person to have their meal comfortably. Tanya try, I go, do you want the booth? And she goes, why do we both have the booth? And I go, no, Like, this isn't one of those situations where it's like, oh, this is a foe top. Let's both sit on the same side,

And where would I have room? And she goes, you'd have this much, which I'm holding up maybe.

Half Yeah, yeah, so selfish, I have no you you were giving me the small portion in yourself the big portion.

I'm like, never would I ever do the same side of the booth unless it was like maybe your birthday or something, and we had this space, but this was like a traditional two person table.

So then she tells the waiter.

She's like trying to convince the waiter and he is like, n he was like nine times at all at all, which was kind of it was interesting.

Yeah, I've never interested happened at that restaurant.

Never.

He couldn't even pretend to like us.

And then Tanya is like, oh, let me film like video of you waving at the screen.

So she films it. She's like, let me use my wide lens. I'm like okay. So she posted on Instagram and everyone starts coming for me being like, oh my gosh, like why is she so far away from her I can't believe you're that.

Far to look away in that photo.

So people are like because I reposted it, so people are messaging me like, oh my gosh, why are you all so far from each other? And I'm like, Tanya, so you know what, this was so sabotagey because I posted my act the real view, which was like very normal, we cheers, We didn't have to reach far, and.

Everyone's like, oh my god, Tanya made it.

Look so far all that was not my intention. I did not. I've been.

The point five girly now. I don't know if you've noticed, but that's like my new vibe.

Did Robbie rub off on you? Because he loves a point five point five?

But his and are like.

He warns our bodies and things.

Yeah, I think he like goes below. Yeah, he does not do a great job. Yeah, so it's not him. It's like gen Z's when using the point five. Oh you're into gen Z to gen Z, But this little hack I do enjoy because you can feel, well, it's so weird because it's like you can film yourself like this with the point five and actually see yourself and I feel myself like that a lot.

Yeah, you know, yeah, the the usual.

Yea, what the youth do?

Yeah?

So yeah, that was that. That was your intention?

It was my intention, but I was laughing because I got so many dms of people being like, she's why is she so far?

This is your worst nightmare? And I was like, I know. I asked her to sit next to me, and she said no, it's just.

You don't set up the truth. And then all the tanyas come at me and I come and just like.

When I posted stuff with Jojo and Ali and I had all the tawnyas, I was like, I have so much anxiety to post with any of my other friends right now. I'm literally this is not good and need every wanted to relax.

It's all in jest. That felt pretty that one.

Didn't feel in those Some of those comments didn't feel very just like your spiral on my comments.

Yeah, you know, we all go through peaks and valleys in life, and I was going through a moment and I just needed to But I'm not anymore.

I'm gonna I'm gonna peak feeling good.

Tanya seven point zero.

Yes, the diarrhea has stopped.

We are poops are solid, and Heaven's gates have opened for me.

Like it's.

Yes, yeah, you gotta have, Like you can't be having stomach issues to enter into the new version.

You cannot elevate with stomach and shows that only holds you back, only holds you back.

You also were all white last night, and everyone's like, did she think that Robbie.

Was going to propose a night?

I'm like, you, guys, Tanya's brand right now is all white all the time.

I'm in my white era. Okay, it's just all white all the time.

But I did think it was It's cute that so Becca came to pick me up and she just stayed her car and I came out and Robbie wanted to come out and say hi to you, which I loved.

I loved that.

I know, I feel like I haven't seen him in a minute.

Yeah, I know.

I was like thinking about that because when I said hey, I was like, I haven't.

I don't even know, like like a long time.

Yeah.

But you know, what's going to be a good time is only all go to dating Kaylin's wedding. That is going to be that's going to be a root and tooting.

Yeah, good time.

By the way, I did r VP.

Finally, congrats, thank you, and the what's the theme?

Though?

You said, it's like I have to wear cowboy.

Bood mountain chic.

I think.

Yeah, I'm a little concerned. It's not totally my vibe.

Uh huh.

I don't know how to wear cowboy boots with like.

Cowboy boots mountain chic that seems like western chic.

Yeah, I mean kind of basically encouraged.

Oh okay, my cowboy.

Boots, cowboy hat. It's just like you for the I think the welcome party.

Yeah, but it isn't suposed to be like nice. Don't you wearly cocktail stuff?

For Yeah?

Do you wear cocktail dressed with cowboa boots.

Yeah, you're gonna have to look on Pinterest.

We're gonna need some help with this for sure.

Yeah.

Well we have a little bit of time. You're not asking me the day before.

We don't really have a.

Lot of time.

Well, we have enough time.

It's just around the corner.

It is just around the corner. But just you have enough time. Yeah, it's gonna be so fun and it's gonna be very excited.

Me too.

And then we thought we were gonna be sharing a cabin, but I don't think we are anymore. I don't know what we are.

Yeah, oh great, wheez a lot of that one. No, it's the four of us er one roof, baby one roof one toilet.

That's literally my nightmare. But we're gonna make do. It's gonna be very campy and fun. Yeah, speaking of Eras, because you said you're in your all white era.

So Taylor still to announce.

Oh yeah, yeah, I just I'm gonna remind me of something else.

Okay.

So Taylor Swift announced that her Eras documentary is going to be coming to theaters, which is very.

Exciting October thirteenth.

October thirteenth, Yeah, is it just for that weekend or is it?

Do we know?

I don't know.

I think it's just for the weekend. It's like Saturday Sunday. Yeah, yeah, like four days or something.

Yeah.

But then I'm assuming it's going to go to like a streaming service, I would imagine. So I was like, you know what, I'm not going to be in the same position like I was for the concert.

I'm going to go and immediately get tickets.

So I go, I'm like frantically logging onto Fandango trying to like make sure I secure a ticket. I go to like select my seats and like the whole theater was available, and I was.

Like, oh, this rush, it's not quite the concert.

Haley goes, Yeah, they would rather see her live, and I'm like, yeah, but not everyone to see her live. This feels very exciting.

I know, I'm surprised.

Yeah, so anyways, I got a bunch of tickets, just secured them primetime.

Yeah, I'm gonna be there.

What time?

Seven on a Sunday, late on a Sunday. I know, I asked you, but I was also like, she might decline because of the time, but time.

Yeah, if you feel super special.

Yeah, I wanted to tell you this story of.

I took Sunny to the vet. Should we take a break and come back?

Okay, yeah, I'll take a break because it's a little bit lengthy, but it's very funny.

Okay, we'll be right back. All right, we're back.

We are all distracted by the longest alligator ever recorded. It's been captured in Mississippi. This is breaking news.

This thing looks that is pretty historic. Yeah, that's a dinosaur.

Wow.

Okay, sorry, I got distrapped. I just happened to look up on the screen and.

Got I'm really upset because I feel like I missed a really good segue and from what from for this story? But I took Sunny to get her teeth cleaned, and her anal lands expressed from the vet right, and so, uh, this was the other day when I was wearing all white and I go to pick her up, and I'm like, oh my gosh, my girl, I'm holding her. I'm like, oh, I mister, and I'm holding her. I'm holding her, you know, because she gets scared of the vet. So I pick her up and I just hold her. I don't even

She responding at this point, yeahh she like yeah.

I looked down and I have poop all over me, and I like lift up her tail and I see like a nugget of her poop like wrapped in her tail. And I don't know if it was like from the anal expressing or like she's never had that in her life, like she never gotten anything stuck in there and it was all over me.

That's so upsetting.

Yeah, in all ways, do you know what they call those?

What a dingleberry?

Oh?

I didn't know that, actually, I didn't know that. Yeah. So she had one big dingleberry and she was just all over me.

Yeah, so it it took you a minute to smell that.

Are we concerned about that part?

Yeah kind of.

But it was like really tucked in there, you know, like when her tail is down, like it's like it was tucked in there.

Oh it was so that's viral. Yeah, it was pretty vile.

Yeah.

Yeah, and then I went to take up my bare hands and then I was like I can't do this.

So then I just like put her down and like rushed home.

I gotta say, like, I'm going to be a really great mom because you're like you have no fear with things.

That are gross, thank you.

Like I would be in an absolute panic state. I don't know what I would do in that moment. I definitely don't think I would go to grab it with a bare hand.

Ever, that was my first thought because it was like there, so it's like I'll just pull it out and then I realized I have chills and it might get like cotton more hairs.

I was like, you know, I'm not gonna do that. I'm just gonna cut it with some scissors.

Yeah, dog mom things.

Dog mom things.

That's the that's the con of wearing all white all the time.

I know, it's a tough tough it's a tough connected.

Yeah.

I had a tough conundrum to be in. But you know, the brand has to stay stay consistent.

Yeah, labor days here.

Yeah.

Yeah, you think a modern them applies by those rules. Oh now, maybe I might tone it down a little.

Yeah, maybe some like creams.

Maybe some creams. Yeah, maybe not all white?

Yeah, maybe some clothes, toad.

Shoes yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah, some swede, some leather.

What do you do this weekend?

Mmm? I don't want to Beyonce tomorrow tomorrow? Yeah?

Are you wearing silver? Yeah?

I got I ordered like my all like silver stuff.

In fact, I actually I don't think I'm gonna wear them to Beyonce because I don't think it feels like the vibe. But you remember those I feel like Taylor Swift wore them or something.

But they're they're like jeans and they have a butterfly like encrusted.

Yeah, they're very expensive, so I'm like torn if I'm gonna keep them or not.

But I got them the.

Ones that Taylor Swift war I think, so can someone confirm because we are from area.

Oh, they're very pricey, I think they must be.

Yeah, those that's your silver for the show.

No no, no, So I got those. I got a silver top and silver shoes, and I was gonna wear with that.

But I think I'm gonna maybe channel like all black and silver to really go for like the Renaissance disco theme. But the people like the group were going with they have some like really cute on theme ideas. So I really feel like I got to step that up. I know I need to like solidify that today.

You know, I'm not like an outfit girally, and so all this pressure to have these outfits.

It's a lot.

See that's funny because I also want to, like.

I don't I like and jeans and a T shirt.

Yeah, but I love the idea of like everyone being I'm sure that you don't like this because it's very cohesive.

I do like the theme. I like the I like the camaraderie. Of it, but I don't like to me the execute, you know what. I just I'm not like an outfit is hard for me.

I think I think you told yourself this years ago and you've kept the mentality. But I don't think it's as hard for you as you think it is. Really, I think the modern woman mentality is to get out of thinking that you're not good at outfits.

Oh my gosh, thank you. I needed that.

Yeah.

Yeah, because you are.

You always look cute, you always look put together, stylish, you have cute sexy.

Yeah, oh tell me more.

Like from where we used to be when we would chop together. You're like eons from that person who would buy their clothes too big because it was comfortable. Like, yeah, my sweatpants when they're over his eyes are really comfortable, and that's how I buy them.

It's so true.

I would buy clothes that were like two sizes higher than I should have because I don't let din't like anything tight on me, Like I just wanted it to be loose.

It was exhausting.

We'd go and she'd be like it'd be this sexy, like tight fitted skirt or dress, and then she would come out and it would.

Be like hanging hanging, or like barely fit herself.

I think this is the one, and I'm like, but in a different size, right, So, yeah, you've come a long way, thank you. So I think your mentality has to come with the style.

Yeah, and I'm already thinking of Halloween.

Yeah, as we should. Yeah, creeping up.

Actually today, well I don't know, but today I'm actually going to go and maybe get some fall decor from my porch and like do some decorating.

Yeah, I do feel like excited about it.

September first, it's here, the fall season, even though it's going to be like five thousand degrees in LA for the foreseeable future.

Yeah, I'm like, I don't think it's quite summer over until quite summer over, summer over till the end of September. Hu till the end of September, And I think that's like when it's officially over.

Yeah, it's like right before right before the Heart Reading Music Festival. It's like the eighteenth or something.

Oh so sure, Well, maybe I'll go buy it because everything's out, and then I'll i'll put it out when it's time.

Yeah, I just feel excited for.

Like the changing of September twenty third, when autumn finally arrives.

It's four days before the new season of Survivor.

Exactly.

This has to be timed up perfect.

I do have to tell you something, but a little survivored out already.

Well, that did not outlast.

I think we're just watching too much.

Like I've now consumed two full seasons and I'm now watching two other seasons and that's all I'm watching. So I think I'm gonna give it a little bit of a break for like a few days, and then come back to it.

Like I'm not over it.

I just feel like it's all I've been watching for like two weeks straight.

That's pretty You know. One thing that you do is commit Yeah, I go, you go all in?

Yeah. I actually like that about myself. I do too, thanks.

It probably provides a lot of success in many.

Areas consistency suitability. I don't have that actually, nah, but consistently late I am consistent. Yeah, and you know what I can.

I've actually was I even remotely hassling you last night.

Well not until you like posted about it, but no, but even that was I would have I actually would have complimented you on that had you not posted it because I was like so impressed that you didn't hassle me.

Because she was I called her there. I was like, yeah, no problem, I can go. I can hang like I'm chill. I was so chill.

You were so chill until I realized you were tracking me.

But I told her I had called her earlier in the day and I was like, I was editing a video on my computer.

My computer crash.

I was like I needed to upgrade my computer anyway. So I was like running to the mall. I was like, I'm so stressed to have to get this video done. I I'm gonna can we move the reservation later and I'll keep you posting on time? So I was I did communicate my situation. I didn't just like show up late. And then I was like, I'm still going to pick you up, so just wait for me. I'm gonna be late, but like just wait.

Yeah. So I was like respectfully late, and I was respectfully calm you are. Yeah, I was proud of myself.

I was proud of you too, and like I said, I would have given you a your compliment until I saw the tag on my location. Yeah, which we're this close to removing because you don't use it for.

Oh my god, the whole room is.

This is huge.

You can't take that away.

No, I can't. At any point, I can just end it.

It's so nice like that's why for me, that's why.

I wasn't hassling you, because I could see where you were. So I'm not gonna say, hey, where are you? I can see where you are not close by?

Okay, that that gives you, okay mm hmmm, because.

I would when we're doing the podcast if it's the time and you're not here and I can look and I'm like, oh, she's on allives.

She's closed. So I don't text you, Okay, all right. I use it for good, okay, just and evil.

Yeah, that's the problem is the balance.

Yeah, but as long as it stays balanced, I'm I can hate a lot, not remove that.

I'd like to point something out. What I'm gonna pull up. I fine, my friends Tanya rad can see your location, you cannot see hers.

Oh really, this.

Is a one way street. Oh first, and that's fine. I had that with a couple of Ben Higgins can see my location, I can't see his. He took that away. Sierra, who we work with also took hers away from me. Wow, and that's fine. I did not. I let it go one way.

Uh.

There was one day recently where Tany texted me and she's like, why are you in New York? What are you doing in New York? And I'm like, I'm not New York and she's like, yes you are. I'm like, Tony, I promise I'm not New York. This went on for a while. It's like, oh, sorry, I'm looking at EJ.

I have EJ also as travising and it's a big E, like his thing is an E. And so for some reason I thought it was Easton and I was like looking and yeah, he was like on the East Coast and I'm like, why are you over there?

He's like no, it's not like.

You were like arguing about like where he was. He's like, no, I'm not, and You're like, yes you are.

I do like to look at my fine my friends every once in a while, just to kind of see where everybody is.

So funny to me.

I love it.

It's my favorite social media. I love it Instagram, Twitter, that's my order.

I jack, yeah, just to see where run's up to.

Yeah's back at her house or she had Hayley's.

Oh, she's on the move.

I wonder where she's going, Like she must be going somewhere tonight, you know. I like to check in on Robbie, see if he's like on his way home, or if he's at the gym, you know, or when he goes to get his lunch. I can see him like walking down the street, you know.

Like I still follow Tory Moraley, who used to work here. She's at the Marina Delery Convention Center right now, Like.

What's she doing there?

Exactly? I'm very curious. I won't text her about it, but I am curious.

Took I still have me intrigued right now.

It's so fun.

Tanya is in Burbank.

Yeah, like my old I saw my old room. My old roommate's in Vegas right now, Like, what's she doing in Vegas?

Oh, Laura is back in Louisiana. She wasn't in Europe. So good to know. I don't that's.

Exactly not to say, when are you coming home? You know, she's home.

It's the greatest gift, the greatest gift that has.

Been given the greatest.

All right, we're gonna take a break and we'll be back with emails to round things out.

Yep, all right, we are back.

There's some emails that have come in, and Easton is going to be the reader of the emails today. Take it away, Easton.

Thank you, Becca. I can read and I have the emails right in front of me. Let's do this. First one's from anonymous. We love those. I need advice and I don't know where else to go. My college roommate is going through some marital stuff. She got married and had a baby pretty quick, and now she and her husband or realizing it's not working out, but they haven't officially decided to divorce or separate yet. I've gone out with her a few times and we just went on

Oh.

I'm thinking I need to take a step away from the friendship until she figures things out, but I also want to support her. I don't know what to do. Please help for reference. We're twenty eight years old.

This is tough because.

I totally understand you not wanting to like support her cheating or be supportive of her doing these things. But she is your best friend, and I think that you just need to have a conversation with her about about what you think in a gentle way, because it sounds like she's going through a lot. But I think you can say like, hey, and I mean, I'm assuming probably not, but we don't know. Maybe they've had a conversation of like, hey, things aren't working, let's just take some time apart and

Better than that. I don't want to see her get hurt in the long term. What do you think?

I mean, I think at the end of the day, it's not on us to judge anyone else on what they're doing. And like, I think she obviously knows it's not good that she's kissing other boys and she's cheating on her husband, you know what I mean, Like, she's obviously carrying that burden, and I I'm just going to assume she she feels guilty or she feels bad, and I.

Don't think you need to make her feel worse.

I think just being honest and communicating, like how's it going, how's the divorce going, how's the separation going? What are you guys talk like, you know, keeping the communication open. I just feel like, you know, we were actually talking about this last night at dinner, and I feel like sometimes your friends are gonna do stuff that you don't agree with.

But you just have to let them have that journey on their own, you know.

Like, Yeah, I think for me though, I I can for me, like I'm gonna be honest with my friend, Like if you were doing that, I would be like, hey, like I think that. I just think this is gonna end up with the hurt feelings and like hurt. This is gonna end up with more hurt than if you just have a conversation and decide to separate.

Yeah, and you don't have to like go.

Through I get it you're not sure if you want to go through with a divorce, but I think you need to like be open and honest about where you're standing with your feelings and what you're doing so that there's not this like hurt that comes back around. And I think that like sometimes being a friend is being honest, Like I would feel comfortable and safe enough to be honest with you and know that you're gonna take it and.

You're still gonna do what you want.

But just so you know where I stand, because it's like I want, I want to be like, oh you just do you like I Yeah, I don't belabor, like, don't just like constantly make them feel like they can't come to you.

And I also don't think you should step away from the friendship either.

I think it's having an honest conversation be like, I love you. I don't want to see things go in a bad direction for you. You have a baby together. I think there needs to be some boundaries here. And this is me telling you because I love you.

Yeah, Beca has better advice on this one.

Yeah, I mean even from a legal standpoint, you.

Know, Yeah, thinking that like with the baby, it's like you don't want to get into a position where that comes into play.

Yeah, Like it doesn't though weirdly.

Well depends I think on where you are.

Yeah, I mean I don't know, I don't know how like contested this divorce will be if it happens, but like if they can there's like a selfie with a random dude like while you know, like if they can prove there's infidelity. I think that makes things at least complicated.

Does it really?

I mean I don't know for sure, but divorce attorneys out there hit us up. Does it complicated? Scrubbing in at iHeartRadio dot com? I don't know it. I think the same thing like this is when the friend, your friend needs a friend at times like this, so don't step away. Yeah, but you gotta be honest with them. Yeah, And maybe this person and her husband have an understand I don't know. Maybe they're like, hey, let's go kiss some people.

Test the waters event Yeah, I don't know, spread our seats.

And also the thing is you might give your honest opinion and she might step away and be like, I'm going to do my own thing, But I think it's gonna I think you're a better friend if you can be upfront and honest with her about the situation, because I think no matter what, she's going to come back around and be.

Like, thank you for thank you for giving me that. Or maybe not I would feel that way.

I might be like mad and defensive, and then I think, if I had time to think about it, I'd be like, oh my gosh, she loves me.

Yeah, all right.

I hope that helped Anonymous.

Good luck. Sorry, that's very hard.

That's a tough situation to be in. Next one is Megan. My sister and I are fifteen months apart in age. We're best friends. My sister has never had a ten of friends, so I always made it a point to include her whenever I was doing anything with my group of friends. Over the last year, she and my best friend have gotten to be closer friends, and now they constantly leave me out or doing stuff, using the excuse that I'm a mom and I can't do all the

That sucks?

Yeah? I would be so hurt by this.

I honestly was like fine with this until the hiding their snapchat locations and ignoring all correspondence with her.

That's weird. That feels intentional and like nasty.

You think you'd be okay with the rest of it above that, you think you'd be chill.

Well, there's now we're in the rule book doesn't say God, invite your sister everything, you know.

But like as a best friend, when you're like the best friend with someone and then they've become best friends with someone else, you'd be killed.

With that And I wouldn't love it. I wouldn't love it.

But I do think like there's you know, times in your life where like you're you're you know, she said she just had a baby, so she can't be around as much.

So it's like there are times, no, she.

Said, they leave her out with that excuse.

Yeah, that's not nice, Like let her be the one you know, I can't.

Yeah, yeah, I would just have a conversation. I'd be like, I totally am I'm happy that y'all are friends.

Like that's oh really what you know that?

I think she should say, like have a conversation with them, be like I love that y'all are friends, but I feel really hurt that y'all literally hide your location from me and like don't answer my text or calls when y'all are together.

Are they in love?

That's something that's weirding me out.

Wouldn't it be better for them to be able to hang out without this feeling of guilt they obviously have because they're like hiding their location and everything. It feels like they're cheating on this person.

But part of me wonders if she's had like an exp like if she's made a comment or something, so they're like, well, we don't want her feelings, so let's just like hide, Like if if they're hiding it for a reason, like maybe there was a big fight or something that we're not getting. I don't know. That's like a very dramatic thing to hide your.

Location, you like, but hur when I'm not with you and you're like with Jojo and Ally, but you've never hidden your location from me?

Can you imagine I would lose it?

I would lose it.

Like not only I hide my location and.

I would be so pissed.

Yeah, that's just like mean, that's like very mean girl.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I don't get it. Something's not adding up.

Yeah, something's not unknown, Megan, can you give.

Us more infant?

Yeah, I think I would have a conversation with them. Just be honest, Hey, my feelings are hurt, Like why do you Why do y'all feel the need to hide your location from me? Is there something that I have done that makes you feel like you need to do that?

And look, honestly, I do think like there are situations in friendships where it looks like something's happening, but that's really not what's happening, you know what I mean? Like I've had misunderstandings with you over stuff and we squash it. I've had misunderstandings Paulina, we squash it. So maybe there's

I think it's just worth it.

Delulu is her name, and del is her game.

But it could be it could be.

It could be true, Lou that they are this is unintentional.

Yeah, I think it's worth just having a conversation. And I always like taking the angle of like, did I do something that that made you feel you need to do this because you're opening up the idea that that maybe you could be held accountable, and I think that gives people the safety to be open and honest.

Yeah, so good luck. That sucks. I think that's very mean.

I too, I'd be.

This kind of thing happened to me in high school. Oh my god, it's very high school. Yeah, yeah, we're not adult so with children. But I had friends and we used to go up to this lake and go wakeboarding all the time and it was so fun. We go camping with the parents and everything. And then I stopped getting invitations to go, and I found out, like through my space at the time, that like other friends were going and it was because I don't drink and

Wow.

I hate when people leave you out because they think you're going to be uncomfortable at something. Like I'm like, when I was in college, there were drugs everywhere. Everywhere I went, there were drugs.

I never did them, never felt pressure, never cared, was always fine, was saying no, I don't want it. But it was everywhere.

And I'm like, I'm an adult and i'd rather be like I want to party and I want to like be a here and I want to be with my friends, and I just don't want to do it. But like that's my choice. They didn't invite me that I've been so pissed.

Yeah, I was opposite.

I would get invited to things and I didn't want to go because there was I didn't drink, and I just was like, I don't want to have to deal with it.

I just like, I don't want to have to deal with drunk people. But everything going to the lake, I'd be like, it's great to have a sober person here.

That's what I was thinking, and I thought I was cool. I'm like, hey, I'm that sucks.

Yeah, but that's so that's so something you don't even recognize until you're older and you look back and you go like, why do we think that way?

Right?

Like, oh, you're not.

Putting poison in your body. No, we're not inviting.

And you know what, I never forgot about it. Yeah, Chris and Andrew, I won't say your last name.

Person, Andrew have fun at the lake beer. Okay, we're wrapping up, but this Thursday is our first book club and we so we realized that Untamed is not okay. So the book is Untamed by Glennon Doyle, and we realize it's not really in chapters. It's in like parts like uh, segments words yeah, kind of words.

So eras if you will.

We both read until Dragons, the dragons title I actually read. Did you read the dragons or you.

Stopped at stopped in it?

Okay, I read through dragons, but we say stop at dragons, so once you get to dragons you can stop. Yeah, I forgot. I actually felt like I resonated with different parts than I did when I first read it. So I'm so excited to talk about it and go over it. So get your copy of Untamed. I read it the first time and then this time I'm listening to it.

Yeah, but also, don't we discourage if you don't want to read it, because it's not like we're gonna just like we're not going to give you cliff notes.

It's not what the podcast is going to be. We're gonna be like just talking about.

Oh yeah, like it'll be kind of honestly just topics.

Yeah, and I think everyone will be able to relate and listen even if you don't read the books.

So I've never been a part of a book club before, so I have no idea how this is.

So you're gonna be interesting, consistent things, so scholarly too, yeah, so scholarly and deep. Also, we did try to get Gabby Wendy for the podcast because I know a lot of you were like, please have her on, like it'll be such a good conversation, and we did try, but I guess she doesn't want to do like bachelor podcast.

But I don't, I.

Mean because about anatomy podcast.

That's what I'm saying.

I'm like, hey, we're not a Bachelor podcast, and b that's so not a thing. It's like, so what does that make make you? Guys feel like you're in competition?

With each other.

To me, I was like, Oh, I feel like we'd have such a great conversation, Like I feel like we've been through a similar experience. Yeah, I mean she was a bachelorette, so there's that difference, but like a very similar experience, pretty similar and then falling in love with a woman, and I felt like it would be a and she's so funny, So I was like, this will be such a like beautiful but like kind of funny, just like a good chit chat.

So a woman performer too, I don't know, there's so many parallels.

I know.

Yeah, and then I would call you a performer.

I'm saying the look on her face, I'm gonna need Crystal slow mo, like.

We're both performers, Like, okay, you're a wedding, but I don't have perform Yeah, but I think she gave the exclusive to Bethany Free.

Like it just.

Rubs me the wrong way because it's just like, just because you were on the Bachelor doesn't mean that you guys can't.

Like barely even I mean a almost a decade ago I was on the Bachelor.

Our podcast has nothing to do with the Bachelor.

I didn't even talk about it.

But when you bring in the word competition, I'm like, you and her are not in competition because you have similar.

It was because competition, I said. I didn't. I don't know. I don't think that has the thing to do with that.

I'm just saying like, I don't know if she's like, oh, it's kind of you know. I don't know if she wants to be I don't know if she wants to be grouped in with people from the Bachelor who have done this.

I don't know.

I don't know, but I'm just letting you know. There are people that y'all are like, oh, try to get them.

I try. I try, really try.

We do our best.

And let me tell you, we're still trying for Patrick Dempsy. He has not given us the official no, so like like Goddy said, no, we are still out to you, Patrick Dempsey, Team Dempsey. Until you say no, we will keep knocking.

I'm gonna put something else out there about Patrick Dempsey post. I saw tweet last night. I posted it on my story. Someone said Patrick Dempsey needs to be cast as a character in the next season, and just like that, and he's the one who breaks up Carrie and Aiden. He breaks them off the five year pause. I think I would love that if that happened, Patrick would sign on.

I would take back all of my negative feedback for the show.

If they brought Patrick Dempsey on. That's a love interest.

I would just love him to come on this podcast.

Well me too, but to have him on screen again would be a true blessing.

Isn't he on screens now? Honestly, have no idea, I don't.

Know, but I saw a post about him the other day on a or something.

Yeah, that's a sober Fox right there.

So we will be back Thursday with a little, a short, little episode of John Mill chatting about the book and other things.

But have a wonderful week, be safe on Labor Day.

We love you, We love you so much.

Bye bye,