¶ Intro / Opening
Meet Casey Kang-Head , a three-time survivor of acute lymphoclastic leukemia and dedicated advocate for cancer survivors . Casey is the author of Finding your Way Back to Heart Center Cancer Treatment Now what ? And she's also a dog mom to Lily Casey . Welcome to the Stinegroot podcast .
Oh , thank you so much for having me . I am Jennifer . I'm just so grateful to be here with you today .
That is so sweet . I'm always so genuinely astonished , amazed , excited , that people are like , oh , I want to come in your podcast . I'm like , really Okay , thank you . Like yeah , I don't know , it's such a joy each and every time , and today I'm sure we're going to get into a lot of juicy things .
But first , casey I mean , we heard a bit about your bio in the intro , but now , in your own words , like give us an idea of who you are , what you do , what were your like , your journey , the stories that she told you , your microsoft .
Before I was diagnosed in 2014 of cancer , I was very career driven , very goal-oriented , trying to chase this quote unquote dream that we have of , you know , a very successful life , not according to my own terms , but according to society . And then I was .
And then in 2014 , on February 14 , I was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia and immediately my world changed . Overnight I went into the hospital and immediately started treatment . Four months into that , I had a stroke from the chemotherapy , had to relearn how to use my entire left side of my body .
Fast forward to 18 months later when my acute lymph protocol finished . Seven weeks after that , I relapsed for the first time . Chemotherapy wasn't working . We tried an immunotherapy that failed . Then we were supposed to go on a clinic . I was supposed to go on a clinical trial . It ended up being shut down a week before I'm supposed to go on .
So it was basically like what's next ? So , yeah , the long story short is , we wrote a letter of compassion to D FDA and the drug manufacturer for our moonshot of a drug that was not for my cancer , which was approved . It got made to remission , had a blood cell transplant . Then , six months later , we left for the second time . Wow .
Then we did the immunotherapy first because they wanted the sun cell on the back for our , just in case , and we basically the fingers crossed , hoped it worked , and I have been in remission ever since . I had my five-year mark last year and , thank you , I'm glad to make sure it was moral . What do I do now ?
And there's this struggle of , yes , I could go back to corporate America for 15 , 15 years , 15 plus hours a week , but that brought me no joy , you know , because I went back to work during treatment and I just hated it Every moment . I didn't just eat it , I was commuting two hours a day and I was just in the triangle , right , yeah , that's too long .
So I have always been into health and fitness and I started talking about how I rebuild my body and how I'm overcoming survivorship and fear . And the more I talked about it like struggling and then overcoming , the more women were like how I did it ? And I was like , oh , that might be something here .
So then I started to coach women and I said if I just even help one person , one human , I'll not . What I felt , which was like that you're broken .
I did my job , but then it became how many can I help in like kind of an obsession and I was going down this slippery slope of working over 50 hours a week again because now it's my business and I'm the best with it .
Yeah , you want it succeed . I mean , I get it and I'm sure , like a lot of you who are at the beginning or looking back to where you started and totally relate , right , Because you wanted to succeed . It's your baby in a way .
Right , you're like I want this , I want this bad , I'm willing to like kneel down and do what it's like to work Like I felt like it was a gift from the universe that I had this drive to create a program based on , yes , what I did , but like in such a way that helps so many women that it just like became you're right , it's like birthing a child .
You're like , this is my baby and I wanted to be the best that I can .
¶ Survivorship and Emotional Processing
So it led to me unfortunately burning myself out and that thing that finds the thumbs along the way and all the red flags are like that ignoring we're all , not one like ignoring that . Well , don't try and live a very healthy life , because I don't want to go through that again . I don't want to go through that again .
Yeah , I mean you had the I mean most of , I'd say , me . Before I had a porous stagion . I was with chronicle list illnesses , thrills , like I was kind of like , oh , I'm invincible Like you . I mean rightly so . Right , their bodies are fucking amazing .
But when you go through a period or a moment or something where you're like , ooh , actually I'm not that invincible , like you're like , ooh , maybe , like I know , maybe you have a better understanding of what is there to lose , right , if you've always been healthy , yes , you can be empathetic and you can be like I understand .
But it hits different when you're like I actually know what I can potentially lose and I cannot afford to go there again .
Go there . I was like , oh my god , I'm stressing myself out , I can't go through that again . Like because I know about death and cortisol impacts our health and I was already sacrificing my personal life for this . I'm like , oh my gosh , now I'm potentially sacrificing health . It made me step back , honestly .
I'm curious I want to circle back because it's not a term I'm super familiar with and I'm like maybe some people had questions you said you had to work yourself on and you also work with women on overcoming survivorship . Can you ?
I'm just curious , like , can you tell me more about what you define as survivorship and what the obstacles there are that women face that are there to overcome ?
or work Any time along the journey is survivorship , because you're literally surviving every single day . So , in my opinion , from the time you're diagnosed , the long afterward , and it could be the rest of your life .
Often times when women are filled with a lot of anxiety , a lot of fear , they are really struggling emotionally to understand what business means for my life . I want to feel more like my old self , but I know everything's different . And then there's also the actual physical side effect from going to treatment .
A lot of women are threatened to medically induced metapods . There's mobility issues . There's constant management of work that deem are potentially because of surgery . There's a lot of layers to this that it's not just one thing . It's really complex .
Yeah , I'm wondering if there's also I mean , what I quite possibly is a grief element to it .
Right , you're grieving parts of your old self and at the same time , I suppose , when you go I mean I know it from my mom who had breast cancer you go to therapy , you meet people , you bond with people , you sit through chemo together , and she had not all of them made it .
So there's quite a lot of layers of grief as well , personal and interpersonal , and I'm wondering also , I don't know , oh , there's some element of guilt , not only for stirbining , but also the massive impact that what you just went through had on your family as well , because it's not just you you are going through it , because you know where I'm like .
You all go through it together .
Yeah , oh , I relate so deeply , like I mean , every time I tell my kid like look , I cannot do this right now with you because I'm not well enough , it breaks my fucking heart Right , like the guilt .
Like it's not every , Not all day , every day of all the days , but there are moments where I'm like the guilt is like right crushing , because you're like yes , I want to play with you , but I know if I do that right now , that specific play you want to do , I'll pay for it later by maybe not getting out of bed .
So it's the constant of like what is possible right now and yeah , there's always something else to do and like that's all fine , but you also kind of like need to Let that emotion of guilt start , so you can let it go .
But like often , yeah , otherwise it's just back in the cupboard and then at some point the cupboard explains because it keeps all your guilt and will fit and start something .
It's like any emotion . It's like holding up the anger or the sadness . It's like you have to literally profit it . Let it go so you can move on . Otherwise it's just like it's in the inside of you and faster . And when it's faster it gets loaded . Yeah , it does . Yeah , when it gets lowly , it's not good for you , Like it's going to need you away . Okay .
What was a way that worked for you processing those emotions , especially knowing that it fosters and it's not good for you . And you are in remission . It's not like I don't know , you want to get better .
You know to get better you have to have less stress , you have to feel better , you have to let go like guilt and like sadness and like you have to process . It's almost kind of like there is a pressure to deal with those emotions at all .
Yeah , so like going to that is where either you get stuck and you don't process it and you are just kind of miserable , or you actually address it so you can move on and heal .
And for me , I'm one of those people that in my all three year old , my childhood and up to cancer , would have been one of those people who just like locked it in a cage and like shoves it down , never talk about it again .
I think that's our default mode anyway . Right For most of us at the beginning , because I don't know , maybe the next generation will be different . I mean , thanks , mom and dad . My parents were not emotionally equipped Like at all . Like , I mean , um , so I had to learn and I had to learn it , and I'm still learning lots of it .
And it only made like became really obvious that I'm like , ooh , there are some parts missing . When I suddenly had a child and I'm like , oh , hmm , hmm , I probably should not repeat that , so let's bring that cycle . But how do we do that ?
Like , how do you break the pattern ?
And so I yeah , and how do you like address with emotions , like how do you not just like sweep it back under a rug and hope it moves , it goes away , when you don't look like I don't know , sure ?
Like I didn't want to rough me , like there wasn't a part of me that was like what ? I then , oh , oh , I'm in that boat , sister , I want to do suddenly really bad Like if we quit sweeping under the rug and go , I'm like what Right I'm such a good sweeper . That's the person .
Yeah , I'm an endocrine seven , so any kind of anything that doesn't make those feel like fun and exciting to me , I'm like sweep , sweep , sweep and so unfortunately for me , that came out when I hit an ugly , messy rock bottom , like I literally came home from work one day , drew my bag on the ground and just broke down in front of my husband at the time and
massive amount of tears and emotion and he was like what happened at
¶ Navigating Post-Trauma Healing and Personal Growth
work .
Yeah , what is going on ? Yeah , like what was that catastrophic thing that must have ?
happened ? What happened at work ? Like he's freaking out and I'm like it's not work and I'm like like trying to fight with myself . He's like there's no way to fight .
Oh , of course , you know what I do kind of like with in shock , like this is the first time he's like had this much emotion ever , like I don't know what to do with it in this way , and he ended up calling my dad and his mom and they came over to help support because they didn't know what to do and I just was beyond mortified and embarrassed of what
was happening because I was like I was so strong during treatment . It's wrong with me , like you know . Again , going back to like no one talked about it survivors there's a lot of shame around feeling that way , Like we should just be grateful to be alive , right Like , but we don't . We don't often feel that .
Yeah , and you're , and that also probably like that element . Yes , right , so be happy now . Right , like you , you , you got what you want . You're still alive , so be happy now . Damn it .
Right , exactly , which is why I went back to working like 50 hours a week , two hours a day , and I just I .
You feel like you still had some element of like oh yeah , that's it . When you go away , you prove to yourself that you could still do it .
And that night is really what catapulted me to a drop and I said I'm going to break the pattern . I go . Clearly , the coping mechanism that I learned my entire life isn't working . I've got to do something different and I dove it .
I literally went in like intensive therapy , I did a healing retreat , like all these things that like really , some of it worked , some of it didn't . I had to put it together because , like you know , I didn't feel like a lot of Well , I mean , you don't know what will work for you and what will resonate , right ?
Like I mean , for some it's it's that book and for others is it that that journaling question or whatever ? Like you don't know , right ? I feel you're curious to try different things . You're like what was that ?
And I wasted a lot of time on shit that didn't work and it was quite a stretch .
I'm I mean Tric , what was ? Let's , let's share all . Let's share both of the things . Let's , let's , oh , let's each share one of the things , one of the shit things that didn't work .
Where do I start ?
I know right , I'll pick your best . Pick your best fighter .
So I'd like to honestly , this is what did not work for me . I went to a support group and the whole point of this particular session was survivorship that was focused on how to get out of it . This woman had this wonderful presentation very professional , not a survivor herself and it did everything that she said didn't make any sense .
It was like go back to living your life and just forget about , like , what happened .
It was , it was . That doesn't sound very . That sounds like a bass . That's kind of what she was preaching , oh my God .
Okay , yeah , that's right . And then one that was there was kind of like wanted to stay in that victim mentality of like yeah , we went to cancer , like , can't you understand ? Like , oh my God , it's me Like , I don't know , like , and I was just like I don't want to think here . I was like I want to live again . What are you doing ?
And then finally this gentleman by this session stood up and I'm not kidding , he looked very angry and he goes this is all great info , but how the f does it work for me ? And I just was like what do we get me out of here ? What do we get me out of here ? I'm so uncomfortable , oh , can I just leave ? I literally was like I'm not comfortable at all .
Honestly , can't be out . And that was probably the worst experience that I had , because if everyone's not on the same page to heal , it is awful . So that's the takeaway I'm not on the same page . Yeah , the same thing . Oh , it's a recipe for disaster . And just sitting there talking about the struggle isn't actually helpful to move forward .
Yeah , there's a point where talking about it helps , but I've got to follow where I would something else . I mean , yeah , I thought that my name was very similar , but I had to do a quick detour of my psychologist telling me I'm not really sure if you're fully acknowledging the scope of your illness and being unwell . I'm like I'm fine .
Right , I had to do this quick detour of like oh shit is actually bad , but it didn't really change the setting of I don't . It doesn't make me feel . Yeah , I appreciate the community and support deeply , but it doesn't make me feel any better if I'm around a bunch of both people .
No , I agree with you . We can't help what happened . Why are we sitting in it Like , oh , we can't change what already happened , we can't go back where we have no time machines , so we can only .
Yeah , oh yeah . That sounds a lot of like we're going into the topic of releasing , which right like how can you like walk that sight row between and between yes , this happened , this is a part of it . Now , I'll never get back to all . She's gone , she's dead , she's bye-bye ?
And at the same time , like that gray area of like I am , this new person I am discovering myself and , at the same time , kind of like letting , not being fully defined by it , also like letting shit in the , letting shit be in the path , while also acknowledging that that great space between those like the whole stuff , like I don't know I forget all the shit
that I ever have been I don't give a fuck Like completely oblivious and the part of like I'm moping around of all the things that ever happened .
Like , how do we navigate things ? It was a great question , and I feel as though I , for me , it is . It is , though , like I still live with chronic pain , and there's a lot of things that I can't do because of my stroke .
Like I just that body it's not , I'm never gonna be able to do certain things , like it just the byproduct of what happened Does it make me miss that I'm not able to ? Of course , like wouldn't I want to go back ? Of course , like that's not the question . The question is I can , so what can I do going forward ?
And so , for me , it was like I had to create a new identity of a woman who who , yes , this is a part of her story in the or , I'm sorry a chapter in her book , but she is not stuck on that page , and he is creating a new chapter , and the story has yet to , the book has yet to finish , still so much .
Yeah , yeah , it's just another chapter . It's just another chapter . I'm still the same book , still the same cover . Right ? Maybe you changed the front , but it's still like .
Yeah , yeah , and that's the only thing I had to look at . It was like it's not that I'm wanting to go that person completely Like that . She served her purpose . She was great while she was there . I think the best part what .
She's got you true keto Like multiple times . She's amazing . She's a warrior , right Like .
But at the same time , like I couldn't be that thing , like I couldn't be that thing person Continuing on forward , Like I took the best parts of her with me .
Yeah , we served her purpose .
Like that persona of you served her purpose she did her job well and I took the best parts of her with me , but I let go of the parts that , like , no longer serve me , the you know , the obsessed about , like this goal of life I don't even know that society puts on us .
You can substitute with anything , right , like I mean , if you can't relate to the illness Like if you're listening and you cannot relate to the illness bit , then like think Kevin's , but it makes the same for business , right ? Like there is a point where you feel like I kind of like have to shed parts of myself to go on bigger things .
Right , like I mean , if you starting out and you're realizing I'm kind of like at a plateau it's not I don't know , it feels like I'm stuck Then maybe you kind of have to look at what brought you there and what you have to shed , or who you have to become to get where you want to go next 100% .
It's growth and evolution over a lifetime . Like we're not 18 anymore . I don't want to be 18 anymore , oh .
God , no , 18 was no , no , no , no , no , no , no , god . I mean I would take late 20s for sure .
I would like yeah , I'm going dad like cool , but 18 , no , god , no , no , keep 18 , no , no , think about it in that context of like best we're not that woman who would be in like why do we expect to be the same woman after some massive trauma or life change ? Like we're not . Like . It's like giving birth to a kid .
Like there's like before the kid and there's like yeah , and at the same time , yeah , and like , this is where , oh , this is the I know I'm getting . I mean , I'll get IRLs . I can already get through like of , like the multi-dimensionality of time , right . Like , yes , you're not that person and at the same time , you're still only 100% Right , the same way .
Yeah , the same way , as you're not like six years old again , but you're still the little kid inside of you and he comes out every now and then To remind you . I think you nailed it , but so true .
It is like we have protector parts of us that like broke it and trauma .
I know , but that's so . I mean , this is so interesting , right , like how some of us have . Although they embrace change , maybe on paper , um , where do you think they embrace change ? Who have such a hard time with letting go of identities , emotions and roles that no longer serve them ? Why do you think that ? How do you explain that ? I ?
doubt it , I don't . You know . Honestly , I think it becomes a part of you Like so , for example , like in regards to like someone's surviving cancer , like you get stuck in that I am this person instead of moving forward and like yeah , I had cancer versus like I am cancer , like I'm not cancer .
I had it , yeah , but I'm not cancer yeah , like it's not who I am .
Yeah , oh , that's such a good example . Yes , that's , I never really thought about it .
¶ Self-Worth and Success
I kind of like intuitively did that , like I . I say I don't say I , oh , I'm a celiac , because I don't fucking identify as a celiac person . I say , oh , by the way , you gotta have , it has to be gluten free . I have celiac . I'm just , I'm great , someone who happens to have celiac . I'm not a celiac .
I'm like that's not a role I want to identify with . So , and that was just like yeah , that's , thank you for saying that . That was the reason I'm like that's actually spoken out loud and intuitively .
I don't like did but yeah , some sort of yeah , right , I'm like no one's got that Jennifer , then then just a disease Like , or just a chronic illness Like which feels hard at , which , which , again , is something some of you will shrug off and others , who can relate , will fucking cry when you tell them that three times .
Right , because it feels so all consuming at times that you really have to sit down and ask yourself what am I apart from the things that happened to me , right ?
That is exactly it . Like this thing happened to you , it's not who you are .
Okay , so let's , let's look at the same coin , but the flip slide right , like we said . I am thinking out loud . So we said , okay , you're not like the things that happened to you , right ? You , you're not cancer , you're not a victim . You happen to have being situations that harmed you or the whole thing .
So the same coin and this is going to be tough for some or some , I'm sure is the the good thing , the things all people want , right ?
Like when you're in business , you want to have your first 100K launch or your first 10K month or whatever it is you want so desperately that it's on your vision board and people kind of forget that if you happen to have 100K launch , you're not the hundred , you're not then the successful person . It's not really working like that .
You are the successful person the minute you have a client or something else Like the money is a byproduct of that .
I mean even before that the more you kind of decide you're an entrepreneur , right . I mean , yes , you having a business requires giving money to do certain things and you actually make money and have a living and stuff like that . But you're you're kind of like self-valid , like your validation has to come from yourself . Your self-validation has to come from before .
You cannot say , oh , I'll be a successful entrepreneur if I had 100K launch , I don't know , 250k months in a row and whatever the heck else .
You already have to know . It's kind of the minute you just like start something like a business , you are successful .
Most people don't start their own business Like yeah , yeah and like , because I feel that a lot of the things that's one of the more common things Like we talked about burnout or right , when you said like , oh , you were , it was kind of your new business , was your baby , you put in the work , you put in the hours , like , yes , that's one one quite real
side of burnout in entrepreneurship right , you're , you're just , you're hustling to the ground , you've won it so bad , you put in the hour .
But I think I feel like a more sneaky side of burnout is when you actually haven't really mastered that self validation and you're like , oh , if I achieve that goal , I find filament and like purpose , I'll be like the classic if , if I earn that amount of money , I'll be successful , I'll be happy .
If I lose that amount of pounds , I'll be happy , I'll be beautiful , I'll be whatever , um and so then you end up chasing just like another , another goal and like it's just , it will lead to kind of like if you , if you can like outsource yourself on like external things , you're going into this constant cycle of seeking validation and feeling unsatisfied and then
you're doing the whole thing again and the whole thing again and you're like burn out .
Yeah , and it's really easy to do because we how we define glass .
I mean , we both and I'm sure I'm speaking for you here too , I'm sure we've all been there God , god , god , a shitty burnout t-shirt from it , like yeah , like I mean we , we talk about it because we actually know what we're talking about , because we've actually been there and it was shitty . You're like okay , so I'm chasing this thing .
I know I'm chasing these things because I think this thing will tell me XYZ . So how do I stop chasing this fucking thing ? Because it will not tell me XYZ . I tried that before and now I've lost all hope .
So how do I do that ? Right in it comes with knowing your self-worth is not attached to the outcome . Right Like it . It it sounds so simple and theory , but it's like so complicated and I'm like , yeah , that'd be like that's all my Chinese fortune cookie , but it's really hard to like rewrite that script that's in your head .
We go right , like I'm just going to show up , you're the best I can , don't worry about that Okay , Kater .
Then here's the million dollar question . How do we rewrite the script in our heads that keeps us attached to things because we want them , but at the same time detach so we don't want them ? To tell us things about ourselves that aren't ?
You know , for me it was really hard and it's still something I find from time to time unpack because it doesn't just go away .
So well , at each level you are at , there will be something different where you're like hey , I've never experienced this before , Maybe exactly .
That's always evolving , but for me , I really had to define what success looked like for me . You know , I had to get really crystal clear for myself , like some parameters that were not attached to any outcome .
Like you know , for me , showing up is my true , authentic self was a big goal and not like because we all like kind of , we kind of like , oh , I love that goal , we had this hate . When it's social media , yeah , we're about the people of you and it's like , well , no , I'm just going to , you know , pull back the curtain .
You're going to see all the messy bits and everything , if he's right . So defining it in a different way , like I want my client to achieve a level of success and if that means they , you know , need an extra call or they need extra time , like I'm not going to sit there and go no line in the sand , like not okay .
¶ Recognizing Burnout and Finding Solutions
Like I've changed , kind of , my outlook on defining what it needs to be and defining what it looks like in my bit and that it helps with , you know , understanding like it's not just about the money the reason why I started this one moment right , and reminding myself and bringing it back there all the time and going . You just help them .
There was no monetary value , but the whole goal was helping . Yeah , what is helping ?
Yeah , and really I like that . And then you always kind of like circling back Okay , michael , what's one person ? I have one person in front of me now we're at the end of our call and like she's in here , whatever , like what is helping her now ? Yes , it might be going over time console her , and so so I'll do that Right , Because it is in my power .
So there is no negative downside for me . I'm not , I don't have to be somewhere else Like I have to type , like whatever , like you can always find a way to make it work , and that by no means it's not black or white , that by no means should like , should be you on their valuing your services . You're not charging for your , for whatever it is .
You do whatever . No , no , that shit . Like , no , right . But to kind of like really bring back the humanity and be like what would help this person in this situation right now . And sometimes we can do right . I mean , I'm all about boundaries .
I need boundaries , otherwise I wouldn't like anyone who's dealing with chronic illicit or illicit with no rest , without boundaries . Yeah , it goes up in flame , but but sometimes dad really got to be . You know what ? Today , all the stars align and I can say fuck this boundary and we've got to focus on what is needed right now . Right that is .
You can give yourself permission to out in the fly , change the boundary , or you know , just for this moment , and put it back in place Like it's not a boundary that is set in stone . My boundary is very movable , it is flexible and it it just it's on the fly . I give myself permission to change it .
Yeah , yeah , as , as you and you can always like , as you can give your presale permission , you'd be like , no , this is a hard boundary because I , I'm not willing to , I cannot afford to , whatever . Right , like , yeah , really , if you're self permission to do the uncomfortable part . Well .
And like , really , yeah , if you and I mean that goes back to giving yourself a mission to shed the parts , right , that are no longer serving you . Right , that we talked about before .
Right , like , just give yourself the permission to , and if you're not able to give yourself the permission to change or to be loving and kind to the new person you are , at least give yourself a mission to be curious about who she is . Right , yeah , it starts with being curious , curious enough to be like , oh , who's she ?
Yeah , it's almost like a no need to find one , because you have to get curious . I'm like , okay , these are the parameters I'm given to work with . Like , how do I operate parameters ? And , right , like , where's my wiggle blab , what is this ? And it's a trial and error process and it takes some time to follow it .
Like you're like , oh , that's it , you gotta do something else , you know , and you figure it out along the way . But if we're not sure we can begin with , we're going to bring our old stuff with us every time and then we're just tearing around garbage bags , right , yeah ?
Yeah , we're going to go to the baggage . Right , we're going to go to the baggage .
How many bags of garbage can you carry at some point ?
Yeah , and I'd say most of us can endure carrying too many Right and that's one of our problems .
Yeah , I would agree , like no one's going to entrust it because we're like I'm just supposed to , what is it ? I'm just supposed to , you know , just fight through it , or you know whether the storm or yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah , yeah .
And again , yeah . I mean it's not black and white , right , there is truth about it . You have to weather the storm . Otherwise , if you decide early on I'm not going to weather the storm , then half the battle is lost , right ? But at the same time , there's a better way to .
There's a better way to weather the storm . Like you can have umbrellas , you could shower a raincoat , like there there .
Right , yeah , you can be better equipped . That's why they're in the store . Right , you can have a better boat . You're better to store . You can learn like you can have better equipment .
Yeah , you're better at it .
Oh yeah , I love that you always look for a better tool .
So we were talking about a lot about burnout and how like what after early , what after a lot of the common ones I see in people during their businesses , or kind of like rind and hustle , like been there , done that , and then kind of like the sneaky one of oh , I'm going to chase this fame because then I'm like a super , super exciting entrepreneur and that's
more sneaky , and I kind of like want to circle back to that , because I know you brought something with us for like in the link . We'll link it in the show notes . That kind of like helps us to recognize burnout and or to kind of like make sense of it .
Yeah Well , I just a bit about . It's just like understanding what burnout is and recognizing , by asking yourself some question about your old behavior and your and what your body actually feel when it's dysregulated versus regulated , because our endocrine , our bodies actually know when we're stressed out . It's just are we listening ?
Yes , and the mean thing is they're not like our nervous system and our like hormone system . It's enough for them to stress out and think we're stressed out and not if we're actually in a stress way . So I mean , basically every time you think is stressing , but you're saying to your body , stress , stress , stress , stress .
And your body cannot really tell the difference between is it just a made up scenario she put , she had in her head , yay , go her . Or if it's actually like happening around , right , I mean to some degree .
Right , I mean if you , if you're chased by a bear or I don't know , then you have some sort of like yeah , primal instinct kicking in , which wouldn't happen otherwise . But the stressor , the biological , biochemical stressor , to some degree , are very much the same , whether you just think about it or you're actually going through , right .
So all that letting past be in the past and not worrying about the future , because the engine , actually , there's actually some science behind it , right ?
You know and I think oftentimes you are it can just like push through , push through , push through . So you don't even see it because you're like yeah , just one more one .
Why didn't like ? Or you just , yeah , yeah , we're just so out of tune , right , like . And then you have this one thing and everything kind of like crumbles down . And I remember when I burned out a brick , my like tumbling down moment was when I was standing at my local shop and it didn't have my favorite kind of yogurt . I mean no , but I had my two .
For me to function at the time , I need everything to go to plan . Like it , like , otherwise I could not have done like 70 hour weeks , like all the things my poor boy brush . He was like it's not about the yogurt , is it ?
Not even close . There's not even nothing to do with the yogurt . The yogurt , right ? Hey , let's get you home . The yogurt was one thing that kept it over to you and like that is , the thing about burnout is like it's nothing to do with what's actually happening . It's something so my new and long where you're just like I can't do it .
Yeah , I mean , am I bothered by that I did not start with my favorite yogurt ? No , I'm not , like I have another one . It's fine moment it was everything yeah . It was everything . Pc . This conversation was also everything . I feel like this was like , also like I don't know part , coaching part and lightning part .
First little story I live , this was this conversation was everything . Before I let you go , I always one last question . I'm sure your answers going to be great and I'm going to put it on my list . What book and I currently ready For ? What odd or your current view will the couple the what I just .
I just finished one . I'm starting another one and I can't remember the title . Oh no , I am currently reading the emotion call and how to embody the motion to appeal . I'm at a lot of like disease . I would affect our emotions , the disease , and it's really complicated .
But oh , okay , that's definitely gonna , and I also got the myth of normal by Dr which is so enlightening . Yeah , yeah , I read a part of parts of it , but once those like , oh boy , at the end of the AC . Thank you so much for appreciating your story and your wisdom .
Thank you . I appreciate it and so grateful to be here with you . Thank you .
Of recording off .