Well, hello ladies and gents, Robert Sykes, Keto, savage.com and today is going to be basically a follow up to the last podcast to the last podcast I recorded with Crystal. We dove into the four of the five pillars of our life with regard to the tensegrity model, some of the things that we're excited about post competition and just how we plan on making those five pillars grow in unison.
But we didn't get a chance to talk about the fifth pillar which was spirituality because Rigel woke up from his nap and we got interrupted. So I wanted to record a stand alone podcast all on spirituality and how that was massively impacted as a result of this competition prep. So that is what this podcast entails. This is 40 minutes of me wading through my thoughts and figuring out how to verbalize it. So there's no guess on this one.
This is just me talking. This is a topic that I don't normally talk about on a podcast and I just want to be fully transparent with y'all. So that is what this is. Again, this is unrehearsed, unrefined and unpolished. But that's just the reality. It is very transparent, it's raw, you get that for sure. So if you have any interest in that component of the five pillar consecrity model, my take on spirituality and how that was impacted by this prep, that is
what this podcast is all about. So hopefully you enjoy and take something from it. I am totally open to suggestions on anything that I talk about with this podcast. So if if y'all have found any articles, books, podcast resources that shed more light on these questions, by all means send them my way. Thank you very much and I appreciate y'all listening. Without further delay. Sit back, relax, enjoy my thoughts on spirituality.
All right ladies and gentlemen, we are live, so I'm super excited to dive into this podcast. This is going to be a little bit different than my normal content. It's not really health and nutrition related per SE, but it has stemmed from my endeavours in this last competition prep. So I feel like it is relevant in that sense. So when it comes to the, the last podcast I recorded was with Crystal and we talked about the five pillars of our tensegrity model.
You know, really doubling down on health, wealth, new relationships, self development and spirituality. Those are kind of the five core pillars that we believe to be the most impactful in our lives and just kind of how we separate everything. But doing so in a way that everything builds upon the whole via this model of tensegrity as
opposed to a work life balance. Tensegrity being that everything may put pressure on one another, but that tensional force creates tensional integrity that makes everything benefit. So that's kind of how I like to think. That's the lens I like to look through my life in. And one of the we we we dove into four of those five pillars in the last podcast. So definitely listen to that one
if you had not already. But we didn't have time because Ryja woke up to dive into the fifth one which is spirituality. So I kind of wanted to do a stand alone podcast on that specifically because that area, that pillar has seen quite a lot of change because of this competition prep that I have just you know, rounded out. So here we go on that topic. So when it comes to spirituality, I don't normally talk about this or any of my platforms.
I feel like I don't really talk about anything that's not that spirituality should be polarizing, but I don't want to talk about anything that I don't talk about politics. I don't want to talk about spirituality or religion. I don't want to talk about anything that has so many varying points of view and is not my area of expertise. There's a lot of noise out there online. Everybody's got their own opinion. I've got my own opinion on things.
But if I feel like I can't add value to the people listening or the people consuming my content because I don't know what I'm talking about or it's not my place, I don't like contributing to that noise that is out there. So that's why I don't really talk about the politics and things like that.
Now when it comes to spirituality, that's a chapter in my life that I'm not opposed to talking about, but most people are coming to me for advice on natural bodybuilding, nutrition training, things of that nature. So kind of a different wheelhouse. However, this competition prep really acted as an awakening from a spirituality standpoint and I am trying to incorporate more of the Live Savage principles into my content.
So it seemed fitting to talk about that aspect of my life on this podcast rounding out that five pillar consecrity model. So that is kind of like a long winded introduction as to why I'm even speaking about this in the 1st place. I have utmost respect for everybody's points of view. I'm not trying to be polarizing at all. I certainly don't have all the answers. This is me wading through the questions that I have and learning as I go and just simply being transparent in that
department. So let's talk about my relationship with spirituality and how it kind of was shaped or formed as a result of this competition prep. So when it comes to competitions in general, I've done 5 different competitive seasons and each one has seen me in a very different chapter of my life. Each one has been transformative in its own right. And I've kind of talked a little bit in the past about how each of those have been impactful in the past.
This one specifically was unique in that all those other areas of my life, like, you know, the business, the relationship, moving, all that stuff that took place, college, a career, all that stuff that took place before now, those were all during other competition preps and and those preps were hard because of those massive shifts in life. Now I've I've got a pretty solid foundation. I've I've got a wife. I've got a son.
I've got a business. I've got my my foundation is relatively solid in that I know who I am, what my purpose in life is, and what I'm called to do. So I wasn't really battling with those questions. Throughout this competition. Prep, this prep was transformative from a spiritual standpoint.
Because I wasn't distracted by those other things, I was able to just really become inward and reflective and really think about who I am, what I stand for, what my place is in the world, what my purpose is in life, and what's it all for in the 1st place. And I think that may have been one of the main reasons that this Prep specifically was a catalyst for this spiritual awakening of sorts. So that that's my theory there. Plus, when you're in a Prep, you
are incredibly depleted. I mean, I was pushing the envelope further than I've ever pushed it before. With this prep specifically, I'd gotten leaner than I'd never gotten before. I'd gotten lighter than I'd ever gotten before, and I had gotten just more dialed in than I'd never gotten before. But I pushed it to a point that is certainly unhealthy from a sustainable lifestyle.
You know, perspective. I mean right now I don't know what I am this instant upon this recording, but the last blood work I got showed my total testosterone to be 86 which is down in the tank. My calories got down as low as about 1500 which is incredibly low for me being my maintenance is around 3033 hundred. My body fat got down to sub 4%. My hormones were obviously affected.
Lots of physiological changes are taking place when you get that low, like your hair stops growing as much, your fingernails stop growing as much, but you're just incredibly depleted. Like, I'm really dialing in my water and my electrolytes, but you get lightheaded. There was a few times where I had gotten really lightheaded upon standing quickly. There's two times actually where I legitimately passed out, which I've never had happened before.
So that was interesting and I can talk more about that later. But all that to say, I was incredibly depleted throughout this prep and I didn't really let that slow me down. I mean, I kept doing all the responsibilities that I had to do. Like I still was a father to Rigel. I was still maintaining all my business responsibilities. We were doing a lot of physical labor while we were going throughout this prep.
So on top of the normal gym training, cardio sessions, posing routines, which are all very physically demanding, I was also building a fence, driving T post, digging post holes. I mean, like doing things that most competitive natural bodybuilders are probably not doing as deep into a prep as I was doing. But all that to say, I was pushing my body and my brain to the NTH degree and that took its toll on me physically and mentally.
But I liked what resulted from that because when you are so depleted, nare I say, when you are literally on the brink of death, you have this new found sense of just self preservation that takes hold. I mean, you are literally living minute to minute, moment to moment, like you, you you can't even begin to fathom what next week or next month is going to entail because you are just trying to simply get to the next hour. And I like that state.
I I wouldn't want to stay there indefinitely, but I like that state because it makes you really appreciate the moment that you're in there just becomes this sense of of solitude and presence about you that is hard to describe unless you've been there before. Like when you are literally living minute to minute, moment to moment, just trying to get it through that moment in time. You can't allow distractions
into your life. You have to have a structure, a plan, a protocol, and you just simply go through life in a very present state of mind. And that was definitely the case for me. And in doing that, I just am able to really become honest with myself, brutally honest, brutally reflective and just transparent with my own self, my
own thoughts. So many people that are forced into, you know, a life filled with distractions and outside noise find it nearly impossible to figure out who they are, what they're comprised of, and what they're doing here in this world. And when you strip away all that noise, all that distraction and all that chaos because you simply can't physically afford to have it in your life, then mentally you become enlightened, so to speak.
You have this, this incredible sense of self preservation, self reflectiveness and just self. You know, honesty like who are you and what are you doing here? And that said, without or throughout this prep I I kept finding myself wanting to do things different than I had done in preps prior. In preps prior, I put all of the weight on my own shoulders and that forced me to become a person I didn't want to become.
Like. I would get very aggressive, I would get very frustrated, I'd be very irritable, I would lash out at people and I didn't want that to be the case, especially now that I have a son. I wanted this prep to be different and I went into it with that mentality. Like I wanted to be a very positive person throughout this prep and I was like I never once lashed out and and you can listen to the podcast today with Crystal and she can attest to
that and I'm very proud of that. But I think one of the main reasons I was able to accomplish that is because I just leaned in to this sense of gratitude and awareness and appreciation. And in doing that, I also leaned into the ability to just simply let go. Like, I didn't put the weight of this prep on my shoulders. I did everything that needed to be done. I didn't deviate from the macros, the training, or the cardio or the posing or
anything. Like I had a better prep than I've ever had before and I brought a better package than never had before. But I surrendered that sense of just like misery, like I didn't. In the past, I would associate being miserable with doing the right thing and being intense and just simply going as hard as I could.
I went harder than I'd ever gone before with this prep, but I wasn't miserable with it. And the main reason I think that is the case is because I did surrender that expectation, and I just simply leaned into the possibility that, hey, this isn't about me specifically. I am doing this for a higher purpose. I am doing this for a thing bigger than me. And in having that approach to it, I was able to push myself harder than I had ever been able
to push myself individually. Which made me realize that I couldn't have done what I had just accomplished with this prep by myself. You know, call that whatever you may. But I believe that this prep opened my eyes to the fact that I didn't do it alone. Like I was able to lean on God to get through it and to get through it in a way that I'd never been able to get through a prep before while maintaining my relationships while staying positive, while help, while helping others.
And that was a pretty big aha moment for me. So when it comes to spirituality and God and my relationship with God, I feel like I should give you a little back story here. So I was not raised in a religious setting whatsoever. We went to church a few times when I was younger. My grandparents are my my granny specifically is is highly involved in the church, but when we moved away from them, that was not really something that was a part of my day-to-day
life. My dad, whom I love and respect dearly, is an evolutionary biologist. Like he does not believe in God and he is a scientist. He's a researcher. He is a very black and white analytical type of guy, which I can totally appreciate and respect 'cause I am that as well. But he is not a religious type whatsoever. So I was not raised in a religious setting. I didn't go to church really much beyond those few times when
I went with my my grandparents. And as I was going through high school and college and everything, you know, I I tried to figure out where I stood on that topic. You know, is there a God? Is there not a God? Because everybody asks themselves those questions when they start asking themselves deep questions. And I never really had much clarity on that. I didn't know where I stood on it. I'd I'd gone to a few churches in college kind of individually
just to see if I liked him. None of them really ever resonated with me. And then I moved off to Washington State, met Crystal and we just kind of went through our life, you know, going through our life as as as we were. Crystal was raised in a religious setting, so she had that background, whereas I did not. And as a as a couple, you know, you want to make sure on the same page with things.
So I felt it prudent for me to figure out more officially whereas on the topics that we can be aligned in our thinking and share some common ground. And that became even more important once we had our son, because we obviously want to raise him with similar footing, making sure that we're giving him similar messaging so that he's not confused because that would be the the worst thing. I wouldn't want to have a different stance than my wife and then that make his
upbringing confusing for him. That wouldn't be fair to him. So before he was even born, actually, we, you know, we knew we wanted to have a kid. But I I knew that I wanted to figure out where I stood on this from an individual standpoint. Taking crystal, taking Roger out of the equation. I just knew that I wanted to figure this out and where I stood on it. And we had hired A gentleman by the name of Brandon a few years back and he was working for us.
He worked for us for a couple years and he was incredibly, incredibly, you know, faithful. He, he, he spoke the language. He he was just very confident in his faith, more so than I'd ever experienced anybody before. And I was just kind of confused by that because up to that point, I hadn't really found any black and white answers to anything. And I'm like, man, oh man, how can you be so freaking confident
than any of this stuff? Like you are living and breathing and dying by by what the Bible preaches. But how do you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that that is true? Like, how do you have so much confidence? So he would talk to me about that, and I just really respected and appreciated him as
a person. He was an incredibly hard worker, incredibly good person, great addition to the team when he was with us there, and I was just really intrigued by his level of devotion to his faith and in interacting with him as he was our employee. He started telling me about something called apologetics, which is basically, you know, kind of like a philosophical train of thought of reasoning and reasoning through your arguments from a like, debate standpoint, which I did like that.
I appreciated that because I wanted to be able to bring. People with conflicting views together and just hear their stance on everything I wanted to bring. I wanted to hear where an evolutionary biologist thought about something. I wanted to hear how that was in line or conflicted with what a preacher thought about something. I wanted to hear perspectives from people from different religions.
I just wanted to know and compile all the information, get everybody's train of thought together and just figure out what made sense to me, how I could assimilate that information and then move forward from there and apologetics resonate with him because that's basically what it is. It's it's like a formal debate like here is why we think the way we think and then let's reason through it and then make sense of it from a rational standpoint. So I like that.
So I kind of started diving into apologetics once. I met Brandon in hiring him to workforce a few years back and that went on for that's probably about 2-3 years now. And while I was going through and listening to all these debates and apologetics and and whatnot, I just started consuming as much information as I could. I would go to a few different churches, see what the preachers had to say, figure out if I liked what they were saying or
not, if it made sense. I read the Bible cover to cover. I would dive into other religions and try and figure out what it was they were thinking. I would dive into a lot of the evolutionary discussion and textbooks and science to figure out what its argument for anything and everything was. You know, did we all come from some Big Bang? Did we all come from the hand of God? You know, how old is the earth? Is it 6000 years old?
Was it a gazillion years old? Like all of these questions that we start asking ourselves when we start going down this rabbit hole, I've been asking for the last several years and just diving into the information deeper and deeper and deeper. And again, I'm going to be the first to tell you that I don't have all the answers and I'm not confident in saying that this is that or this is how old the earth is or in that stuff. I'm just in the process of figuring all this out myself.
And honestly, I am a very black and white person. I am a very analytical, data-driven, data oriented person. That's why I like what, you know, I dive into with regard to nutrition and reading these research studies and testing and trialing different macro nutrients and micronutrients and training philosophies to figure out what works and what doesn't from an unbiased, objective approach. That's what I like to do, like I
don't like to bring in biases. I don't like to bring in, you know, quote UN quote religion to nutrition because I just like to figure things out from a scientific, objective standpoint. But the thing about spirituality and faith and religion and and science is that all of this stuff is. I mean, this all happened long before we were ever born. So we can't really look at it from an objective scientific standpoint of here is the scientific experiment, let's replicate it and figure out the
outcome. Because all of this happened long before we came into the picture and we can't really go back in time and create a model that showcases exactly what happened. So we're all kind of giving forth our best guesses and assumptions, and nobody has all the answers. No human has all the answers. So whether you are on the hardcore religious side or the hardcore scientific side, at some point you have to have, I mean, you have faith in one or the other, but either way you
have faith. Like you have faith that it's all coming through natural evolution and it can be explained via that route or through the hand of God in some spiritual form. But either way, you have to have faith in that belief because you can't really look at it through an objective scientific lens in the sense that you can create a model and duplicate it and then see it occur and take place like you could in a Petri dish of a traditional scientific experiment. So either way, there is faith.
That said, I don't think there has to be this mutually exclusive approach. Like obviously there is a lot to be and it can be explained through the lens of science. And science is great. Like, I love science. That's why I'm constantly consuming scientific research studies on nutrition and other things, because I just love
science. I think the pursuit of science and knowledge is an incredibly valuable thing, but I don't think that should discount the fact that there are things that cannot be explained through the scientific method alone. There are things that we can't put our finger on with 100% degree of clarity and confidence. There are things that we just simply can't explain, like love. How is that emotion something that we could explain through a scientific experiment? You can't.
You just feel it. You know it to be true and you know it to be good. And I think life kind of like the whole five pillar thing. Everything may seem to be counter to one another, but it all works in symbiosis. It all creates something that betters the whole. And I think the same can be said with regard to science and spirituality and faith, like everything can meld together and create something better than it would be in isolation.
There doesn't have to be this mutually exclusive approach to things, but I'm kind of going off on a tangent here. So all that to say, I I've been diving deeper into all of these things, trying to figure out where I stood on things, trying to figure out the answers, trying to figure out how to be objective, how to lean into these thoughts and emotions I've had and just how to be, you know, more confident in my own
beliefs and approach. But through this prep and through being so incredibly depleted and in having such a rigid structure to my life, there was a few things that I would do that just became very tangible. So I would, towards the end, you know, I said I was very depleted. I was doing one meal a day. I would train, I would do my cardio. I would pose. And then before I would allow myself to eat, I would take a moment to allow my body to return to a parasympathetic state.
I would go over to the mats. I'd find a corner. I'd find, like this little spot that was away from everybody else. I would put my head down. I would kneel on the ground kind of in like some yoga pose. And I would just simply focus on letting my breathing return to normal and return to that parasympathetic state. Because when you are that depleted and you're that hungry, you just get like in this feeding frenzy and you just want to eat and you can't really focus on the world that like
that becomes a distraction. And that is oftentimes the trigger for a lot of binging and just not having control over the food. So from a very tangible standpoint, I wanted to avoid that, and I wanted to be in the right frame of mind before I allowed myself to eat. So I would do this little practice after doing the training, and I would let my body return to this parasympathetic state, and I would just focus on breathing with my head down, stretched out on the floor.
And I found myself starting to pray when I was in that position. And at first, I don't really know what I was praying for. You know, I was praying for, you know, just to be able to get through the prep. I would pray for, You know, clarity is to know what I should do throughout the day. Pray for having a healthy relationship with food. I'd pray thanks for what I had in life, my family, my friends, just all the things I was
grateful for. And what I realized in doing that over the course of several months is that as I got more and more depleted and the prep got further along from a physiological standpoint, that prayer time was incredibly beneficial. Like, it allowed me to maintain a healthy relationship with food. That's one. But it allowed me to just go through the day in the right frame of mind without
distractions. Like I would have that moment and then I would be able to get up from that and just go through the day positively with direction, with clarity. And that was great. That was honestly one of the reasons I probably didn't get irritable and rude and and negative throughout this prep. From a physiological standpoint, I would come out of that, or I'd be in that prayer and I would be. I'd breathe dizzy.
I would. There's a couple times, like I said, where I'd get up from it too quickly. And I I passed out twice. And I would have these, like weird shakes all over my body because, you know, electrolyte manipulations, fluid manipulations, just simply being depleted, being in a position where my head was down and then standing up too quickly, having a blood rush. Like there'd be like these just strange physical things that were happening. And, you know, you can explain
that through whatever means. That's just simply a matter of being so depleted. But in having those tangible physical phenomena that you don't typically have when you're not in that deep of a deficit, it made me just recognize the brevity of life that much more. You know, when you are that depleted and you are on the brink of death, you have a much closer relationship with how short life is. And I became just incredibly grateful for every moment that I
was given. And I was doing everything I could do in life to the best of my ability with that prep, to the point where if I were to die in that moment, I would be at peace with my life. I had made peace with crystal, with my life, with with what I was trying to do. I didn't have any regrets. I don't have any regrets. And I just felt really good about it. Like, I obviously don't want to die this young, but I realized in one of those moments that if I were to die in this instant, I
would be at peace. And that was a very calming thing. And I would have those physical phenomena take place. And then it started to shape more of my psychological thinking of what I'm experiencing. This piece that I have this profound sense of just, you know, gratitude, love, peace, presence. This is all something beyond me. In the past, when I tried to shoulder this burden myself, I found myself being miserable, negative and just derogatory.
Whereas now I have peace, love, gratefulness and appreciation. And the main shift was in that was that I let God shoulder that burden. The prep no longer became this thing that I was trying to do for myself for some sense of self righteousness. It became this thing of, hey, I am doing this as a vehicle for something bigger than me. I want to help, inspire, educate, motivate people and I can't push myself to the point that I need to if I shoulder
that burden alone. So I'm going to surrender it to God, and everything that I accomplished through this journey and endeavor is done to glorify God. And when I made that shift, I had that newfound sense of peace. And I can't explain that. I can't explain what that means. I can't explain how that works. I can't explain a lot of things. This is just me trying to be transparent and wade through these thoughts and realizations as I'm experiencing them. So bear with me here on that.
But I enjoy that sensation. I lean into that and I have become better for it and I am focused now the competition is over on continuing that relationship, learning more and figuring it out on a deeper level. I think, you know, now the shows are over and I'm not as depleted and I don't have that weight. It's easier to let those distractions creep back in and not have that sense of clarity.
And one thing that I've been doing is trying to maintain the structure routine that I did throughout my prep to keep that connection close. So I'm still doing that moment of prayer after my training, before I allow myself to eat, and just simply focusing on having that moment throughout the day at different times when I feel distractions creep in and when I feel like I am disconnected from the reality of the world that we live in and the present moment.
And that has been a very good thing for me. And again, I don't know. I I don't have all the answers. I don't know a lot of the questions. There's a there's so many questions that I have and I don't even know if I'm meant to have the answers. But what I have noticed is that in surrendering that way, in being more present, in praying to a higher being than myself, I feel a sense of peace that I have never had before. And I am tangibly becoming a better person.
Like I'm surrounding myself with people that also seek that out and are striving to become better. And that like there's a lot of abstractness in religion and spirituality. There's a lot of hypocrites in religion and spirituality. There's a lot of hypocrites in all walks of life, and I don't know. I don't know. I'm going to say I don't know
several times on this podcast. But what I do know is that the deeper I dive and the more I lean into this newfound sense of faith and confidence, that there is something out there greater than me. And I want to glorify that more than my own selfish desires. The better I become as a person in a very tangible way. I want to continue to learn all the different things. I want to learn what the science is saying and showing and be objected towards that.
I want to understand and learn why different people from different walks of life with different upbringings and different religions and faith-based systems think the way they do. And I want to understand why they think that way. And I want to understand, you know, like the more commonly accepted form of religion here and America, at least you know, Christianity grand. There's different variations of that.
Why people in the church think the way they do what what the Bible says, what the Bible shows, what that means from a historical standpoint, from an apologetic standpoint, from a faith-based standpoint. Like I just want to know all of these things. I've been going to several different churches, trying to figure out what message they're preaching, trying to interact with the people and what their
stance is on things. Reading the Bible, having devotions, praying, figuring out what that means, how it makes me feel, what it's suggesting I do, and how I live my life. These are all things that I am in the process of figuring out. But what I can confidently say is that the deeper I dive into it, the more compelled I am to live a life that I am more confident is a better life. Like, I see myself becoming a better person and that is a very tangible thing.
So while I don't have all the answers and there is a lot of questions, which is hard for me, being as black and white and analytical and data-driven as I am, I can tangibly say that I am leaning into this with more confidence and flourishing as a result. And that is worthwhile and I am very happy and excited to keep learning.
For that reason alone, I can confidently say that what I accomplished through this prep and the framework and the mindset that I had to adopt in order to get through it throughout through some of the the lows that I experienced, through some of the highs that I experienced could not have been done had I gone through this prep like I had in the past. And the primary difference was that I let go and put my faith in God to help me get through it. And that made all the difference.
When I look at what I've learned thus far from diving deeper into this, the primary message that I've gleaned from it is to love one another, to glorify God, and to love His existence and what he stands for with all of your heart, mind, and soul. There is so much self centeredness in the world, so much negativity, so much selfishness and lack of gratitude. I'm a happy person and I'm happy because I'm grateful for all that I've been blessed with. I have so much to be grateful for.
We all do. If you are listening to this podcast, you have so much to be grateful for. And if the primary message that I've gleaned from at least the Christian standpoint is to love God with all your heart, mind and soul, and love others, that is a pretty solid message that we can all get behind. So I'm definitely going to get behind that, and I'm also going to keep diving deeper to figure
out where I stand on all this. But I'm grateful for the opportunity to do so. I'm grateful that I have found my calling in life because. I feel like we all have a responsibility to go through life and simply add more value than we take. I think, you know, I don't want to be a Leech on society. I don't want to be, you know, a a a negative. I don't want to be a drain. I just simply want to leave this world better than I found it.
Because I'm so grateful for the opportunity to have lived in it in the 1st place. And I am grateful to have found my calling and purpose. And I want everything that I do to glorify God and His higher purpose for me. I feel like there's so much opportunity out there and so many people are stuck in a life that they're not passionate about and they're living in a mundane way because there is a
lack of passion there. I love my life and everything that I'm doing has the opportunity to act as a vehicle to add more value to those I interact with so that I can love them more and add more value to them as well. And I think if I do that to the my best ability then I can leave this world better than I found it. Glorify the God that put me here and I can be at peace with them.
So ladies and gentlemen, that is my, whatever you want to call it, My my discussion on spirituality, our relationship with God, what I've tried to figure out and learn and just decipher over these past several months or honestly several years. So again, I do not have all the answers. I've got more questions than I've got answers, but all of this has kind of come to light
as a result of this competition. Prep and I have tried to be incredibly transparent with all things related to the prep, the blood work, the training, the nutrition, the hormones, the psychology. So it only seemed fitting to be incredibly transparent with this awakening as well. So thank you all for tuning in, thank you all for listening. Much love to every single one of you and I will talk to you next time.