It's the happiest time of the year here at the Savage Lovecast, as we gather in Portland and also Seattle (somehow) for our annual-ish Christmas Special Extravaganza! Come for the snarky sex-advice, stay for the magnificent Shirley Gnome. This episode of the Lovecast is brought to you by Winc- the wine club that helps you to choose wine that suits your taste and ships it right to your door. For $20 off your first order, and complimentary shipping, go to . Today’s episode is also brought to you b...
Dec 20, 2016•52 min•Ep. 530
A woman is living at her boyfriend's house with his parents while he is away. Guess what! The dad has started kissing her on the mouth and tries to slip her the tongue. Should she tell her boyfriend that his father is a loathsome fiend? Speaking of loathsome fiends, a woman's boyfriend is so obsessed with her keeping slim that he snatches food out of her mouth and tosses it on the floor. Any ideas what she should do? In a "What You Got?" a researcher discusses his study about men who are attract...
Dec 13, 2016•56 min•Ep. 529
A poly woman is very happy with her much older dom. But ever since her mother saw some photos of her daughter all trussed up and naked, the boyfriend is totally not invited to Thanksgiving or Christmas. Is it the age difference? How can our caller convince her mother that her lover is a good guy? A hand-wringing, feminist, good-hearted man wants to try rape-play with his wife. How can he delicately, tenderly suggest he pretend to rape her. You know, if she wants him to. Welcome to our first inst...
Dec 06, 2016•50 min•Ep. 528
A gay man wonders if it's possible to have a happy, healthy, poly triad. Can sex give you acne? Dan consults a professor of dermatology to get to the bottom of this one. On the Magnum, a special treat for you uber-kinksters. The gentlemen from the No Safe Word podcast are on to discuss (among other things,) 24/7 master/slave relationships, scat play, and gay orgies in Texas. You're welcome. 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by AdamandEve.com. Get 50% off just about any item, plus free ...
Nov 29, 2016•56 min•Ep. 527
Here's a happily married couple. He digs exhibitionism, which she indulged after taking a deep breath. She wants to try BDSM, but he isn't having it. Is it her right to demand it, and what's his god damn problem? A married woman likes to be fashionable and step out looking GOOD. But guess what! Her husband, wishes she would wear jeans and a grubby tee so all the men will stop looking at her. Dan wants to help her pick out a smart outfit for divorce court. On the Magnum, make way for the robots! ...
Nov 22, 2016•51 min•Ep. 526
Welcome to the Savage Lovecast where we are ready to fight like hell to take our country back. Are you? Apparently, Trump-voting family members are a thing. Should you spend your holidays with these people? Dan's answer will not shock you. A divorced man has started dating a new woman. When he was married he got caught seeing a sex-worker and it became a public scandal. When should he tell his new love about his past? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Lori Brotto in a "What You Got?" about asexu...
Nov 15, 2016•56 min•Ep. 525
A woman has been dumped by her boyfriend of 6 years. She is considering some sort of grand gesture to win him back. Should she throw a parade? Hire a lesbian motorcycle gang to deliver one single rose? Or maybe let him go? A 22 year-old gay man has been dating a 58 year-old man for 2 years. His family isn't crazy about this. The caller is beginning to doubt this romance. Like a sharp beam of sunlight slicing through his cloud of confusion, Dan Savage gives him permission to break up. On the Magn...
Nov 08, 2016•51 min•Ep. 524
On the worst birthday EVER, a woman learns that her beloved long distance boyfriend...has a wife. If the wife asks her, should she lie for him? A man's friend is dating a guy who gets coked up, turns the photos of her face-down and hires prostitutes to sleep with him in their shared bed. How can the caller convince his friend to DTMFA? Hey California! How's it going? Please vote NO on Prop 60, won't you? Dan and porn activist/performer Conner Habib explain it for you. On the Magnum, a woman who ...
Nov 01, 2016•53 min•Ep. 523
A man has been with his boyfriend for 1.5 years. The caller's family is loving and welcoming to the boyfriend. But the boyfriend's family won't accept his homosexuality and won't allow the caller to join them at Thanksgiving etc. How long must our caller wait for his boyfriend to grow a pair, and tell his family to piss off already? Next up, we'll just share the title of this call: "Take Your Chances at the All-Girl Orgy?" NOW you're gonna listen aren't you? On the Magnum, Dan chats with the hos...
Oct 25, 2016•52 min•Ep. 522
How is a sex worker supposed to deal with it when her clients keep quoting Donald Trump?! A woman is dating an insecure man who grabs her boobs at inappropriate times and then pouts when she tells him to stop. Can she retrain him to not act like such an imbecile? On the Magnum, Dan talks to Law Professor Alexander A. Boni-Saenz about the tricky concept of sexual advance directives. A man's mother has Alzheimers. His step-father is taking care of her, and confessed to carrying on an affair with h...
Oct 18, 2016•54 min•Ep. 521
A woman asks her boyfriend to tell her erotic stories when they are having sex. Is this too much to ask? He's running out of plots. A distraught woman discovers that her ex from years ago put up naked photos of her online. Is there anything she can do? On the Magnum, a long discussion about some pros and cons of pornography with sex therapist and author Dr. Marty Klein. And, hear the sad tale of an overweight beagle that nobody wants. 206-302-2064 Today’s episode is also brought to you by the de...
Oct 11, 2016•55 min•Ep. 520
Dan welcomes Trae Crowder, or "the Liberal Redneck" (our favorite redneck) to tackle some questions about conservative Christian bigots, guns and spit. It's a great conversation- do have a listen. Also, a lesbian is dismayed that her girlfriend insists she take a shower every time they have sex. Is she a germophobe or... what? And, a man's girlfriend has announced that she wants to take up smoking. Nicotine. Not even weed. Why? Because her father smoked... AND, a man working on a political campa...
Oct 04, 2016•56 min•Ep. 519
A woman is horrified to discover her new boyfriend's disgusting habit. This habit truly is one of the most revolting things we've ever heard, and you do know that we've heard a LOT, right? You'll have to listen to find out what it is. A woman and her husband want to take the plunge and have a three-way with a woman. But there are some logistics to work out. How do they find a girl, and do they have to get a babysitter for the night? Dan chats with Cheryl Strayed, author of Wild, and co-host of t...
Sep 27, 2016•52 min•Ep. 518
A lesbian is about to go to a wedding with a bunch of conservative guests. And guess who's going to be there! You'll never guess. Ricky Santorum! How should she take advantage of this unusual opportunity? Dan chats with pro-dominatrix, writer and activist Mistress Matisse about SWOP Behind Bars- a project to support incarcerated sex workers. And of course she helps answers some questions about KINKY SEX. Get your naughty ass over to SWOPBehindBars.org this instant. A woman is dating a man who ma...
Sep 20, 2016•52 min•Ep. 517
A man is seeing a woman 12 years his senior. His friends think he's nuts, but he's having a great time. Is there something wrong here? A married man has come to realize that he is poly. His wife is still as monogamous as the day she married him. How can he get her to accept his polyamorous nature and let him sleep with lots and lots of lovely ladies? Dan chats with his smarty-pants brother Bill (an associate professor of English) on the historical roots of American anti-immigrant stupidity. On t...
Sep 13, 2016•49 min•Ep. 516
A bi man in a poly triad wonders how to bring home his couple to meet the conservative parents. A woman enjoys following men around for the feeling of "predatory power" the pursuit gives her. Is this a problem? On the Magnum, Dan speaks with Professor Barbara Sarnecka, in a "What You Got?" showing how uptight our society is about leaving children alone. The study is HERE. And, while on a trip to NYC, and gay man finds someone he knows from back home on Grindr. When he contacted the friend to say...
Sep 06, 2016•53 min•Ep. 516
Hey Chicago! We were in you! And we recorded the whole thing. Have a listen to our live show from last Spring at the Music Box Theatre. On the Magnum, Dan dares to argue with Heather Havrilesky (a.k.a "Ask Polly" from New York Magazine,) about the role of honesty in relationships. Also, a gay man saw someone he knows in some online porn. Should he tell the guy? 206-302-2064 Today’s Lovecast is brought to you by MeUndies.com: High quality, super-comfortable, good looking undies. Get 20% off your ...
Aug 30, 2016•58 min•Ep. 514
A closeted bi woman, newly aware of her own bisexuality, feels guilty when she so much as hugs another woman. How can she get over it already? A lesbian is about to have her wedding. Does she have the right to exclude Trump supporters from the guest list? On the Magnum, Dan chats with NYT columnist Rob Walker, of the Workologist, about how to deal with some sexist, bigoted schmucks at the workplace. A bi woman started seeing a super-sexy bi gal. But! She only gets to sleep with her when the boyf...
Aug 23, 2016•48 min•Ep. 513
Special guest ranter Ana Marie Cox tells us what it's actually like at a Trump rally. (Spoiler: terrifying.) A gay man is living in a group house with a straight couple. When the man in the couple drinks, he gets a bit...handsy, much to his girlfriend's delight. Should the caller get together with his roommate? Will the girlfriend give her permission? What exactly is the etiquette when you discover that your long distance boyfriend of 4 years actually has a wife and kid? Should you ghost him? Or...
Aug 16, 2016•53 min•Ep. 512
A young man living at home is getting blamed for his father's second divorce. That sounds like kind of a raw deal doesn't it? A man is in a GREAT relationship with his girlfriend. It's SO AWESOME. Except when she gets drunk and verbally abuses him. So there's that. On the Magnum, Dan chats with identical twin, queer, pop-star heart-throbs, Tegan and Sara about online dating, and what to do with that bottle of conditioner your ex left behind in the shower. A man and his wife are going through har...
Aug 09, 2016•54 min•Ep. 511
A man has started dating a woman he suspects is a virgin. She's hot, but he doesn't want to have to teach her about sex. Should he bail, or give her a few lessons? A woman fell into bed with a man so drunk, that he didn't remember going down on her. Now he's asking her friends what happened that night. Should she tell? On the Magnum, Dan chats with MTV's Ira Madison III about the complex issues that come with being a black man with submission fantasies. And, the sleepover that fried a mother's b...
Aug 02, 2016•51 min•Ep. 510
A woman is in a new relationship with a wonderful man! But! His ex keeps coming around leaving love notes, Victoria's Secret receipts and otherwise marking her territory. How can the caller flush out the intrusive ex? What is the etiquette in asking out a guy at the gym to join you and your husband for a threeway? Should your husband be present for The Ask? On the Magnum, Dan chats with the creators of Tickled- a documentary about a seemingly harmless fetish, that turns strangely sinister. Also,...
Jul 26, 2016•51 min
Last week, we asked our African-American listeners to call and speak their minds. Please listen to them at the end of the show. It's the American thing to do. A woman is married to a man she knows is a creep. He pervs at all the wrong times to all the wrong people. So is it a good or bad idea to open their relationship? On the Magnum, Wonkette's Rebecca Schoenkopf takes some calls about the continuing rift between Bernie supporters and Hillary supporters. Also, should a woman get a harmless-but-...
Jul 19, 2016•55 min•Ep. 508
A woman with Catholic in-laws tires to figure out whether she should cave in to them and get her little baby baptized. Dan’s advice…may shock you. Then, Dan chats with ex-muslim sex blogger and children's book author, Elynah about sex negativity in conservative Muslim communities. On the Magnum, Dan speaks with trans activist Parker Molloy about the problematic connection the clueless make between transwomen and drag queens. And, another marriage falls apart as a man discovers his wife textin’ a...
Jul 12, 2016•56 min•Ep. 507
The ins and outs of HUMP! Dan chats with Hump! Producer Tracey Cataldo about the Hump! Film Festival- what kinds of films you can expect to watch and how to make the kind of porn we want to see. What to do when your open relationship comes to a screeching halt? A married woman has been getting it on with her married female friend, but neither husband can handle it. Should they continue in secret? On the Magnum, It’s Emily Galati, live at our show in Madison, Wisconsin. This is some seriously fun...
Jul 05, 2016•50 min•Ep. 506
A woman has endured 10 years of sexual harassment from a creep she works with. How can she get him to stop without getting him fired? (Hint: It’s a trick question.) Dan and another gay guy get into a BIG FIGHT about guns!!! In a far more civil discussion, on the Magnum, Dan chats with Moira Weigel, author of “Labor of Love: The Invention of Dating” about how your grandparents viewed dating and going steady. And finally, hear the sordid tale of man who finds himself cat-fished by his own girlfrie...
Jun 28, 2016•56 min•Ep. 505
A tortured gay man can’t envision a world where it’s better to be out than to stay in the closet. Dan tries his darnedest to convince him. Hey fellow homos: call us and pitch in, won’t you? A woman catches her boyfriend signing up for a hook-up app. What does this mean? On the Magnum, Dan chats with the Queen of Ireland, a.k.a Panti Bliss- the drag queen who took on Irish homophobes and won big. A true hero who looks fabulous in heels. And, hear the wisdom of a Trump supporter! 206-302-2064 This...
Jun 21, 2016•52 min•Ep. 504
Please listen to Dan’s heart-rending response to the Orlando massacre. In lighter fare... A 19 year-old bi lass worries that she’ll never get to try ladies if she stays with her monogamous-minded man…forever. Is there any hope for her? A man is about to meet a woman he’s been having phone sex with for the first time. Where he just wants to “bone down,” she’s been talking about moving to his town to start a relationship. How can he proceed with caution in this delicate situation? On the Magnum, D...
Jun 14, 2016•1 hr•Ep. 503
A man is dating a woman who stopped putting on make-up and fixing her hair. If he asked her to start gussying herself up again, would that make him, like…you know…an asshole? A woman asks a question that sends Dan scurrying to the red phone to call a veterinarian for some expert advice. Why does Dan need a vet? You’ll have to listen to find out. (Cat humping.) On the Magnum, Dan and sex blogger Ella Dawson are here to SMASH THE HERPES STIGMA once and for all. Glad that’s out of the way. Also, a ...
Jun 07, 2016•51 min•Ep. 502
Ever since her brother walked in on her masturbating as a child, our poor caller thinks about him when she’s fantasizing. How can she get her brother out of her sex-head? In other yucky family dramas, a woman’s father has advanced dementia, and tugs it openly, all the time. It’s gotten to the point where she doesn’t want to see a single penis- not even her dear boyfriend’s. How can she get her father out of her sex-head? Man. What is going on out there? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Emily Bazelo...
May 31, 2016•53 min•Ep. 501
