Is there a homo bro code? A man hooked up with his casual boyfriend’s roommate. Then the boyfriend moved away and they broke up peacefully. Now the caller is worried about resuming his hook-ups with the roommate for fear his ex’s friends will find out and revolt. Does this happen in gayland? A woman is willing to indulge in hot-wifing to please her husband. She met a new guy, but finds she gets so worked up and horny that it eats up all the headspace in her already busy life. How can she learn t...
Oct 24, 2023•47 min•Ep. 887
A masochistic woman is happily paired with her sadist. They both love it when he bites her. But lately, she’s become more sensitive, maybe because she stopped taking hormonal birth control. In the past few sessions, she had to use her safe word and he’s beginning to sulk. How can they get back to the rough love bites they both crave? 33 eggs: That’s how many of a woman’s eggs are sitting in a test tube somewhere, awaiting fertilization. She is in her mid 30s, and is about to marry her 42 year-ol...
Oct 17, 2023•48 min•Ep. 886
A man’s dad is deeply, absurdly closeted. He has been married to the caller’s mother for decades, but could never admit the truth. Now the caller’s mom has dementia and angrily brings it up to shame her husband in front of her sons. Should the caller tell his dad that he knows he’s gay? Should he tell his mother to stop being so cruel? Hear the agonizing tale of the woman whose boyfriend of 3 months ghosted her without explanation. Spooky. Our Magnum guest this week is Bryan Safi from the “Attit...
Oct 10, 2023•45 min•Ep. 885
A man has discovered his love for wearing feminine clothing. His friends and fiancé are all supportive. But his brother- not so much. Should the caller just expect to move through the world offending people with his unconventional dress? A gay transman has started having kinky hookups. Although he doesn’t want the intimacy associated with “after-care” he does need a little TLC after the more rough encounters. How can he give that to himself? On the Magnum, Dan speaks with infectious disease spec...
Oct 03, 2023•48 min•Ep. 884
A 24 year-old single woman wants to learn how to perform dirty talk, but she has no one to practice on. How can she learn the dark art? A woman is newly out of her bad relationship, and into a joyful era of slutting around. She’s happy as a clam, but when her parents ask about her love life, they treat her like a sad spinster. How can she explain that she’s doing JUST FINE without going into too much detail? On the Magnum, have you heard of the movie “Caligula?” It was a 1979 film produced by Pe...
Sep 26, 2023•43 min•Ep. 883
We start the show with two ass-tastic calls! A domme woman has a pet boy who wants to eat things out of her butt. He suggests licorice. Any ideas for safe food items to be served out the back? And, another woman jokingly asked her husband to eat the dried mango slices he so adores off her ass. When he complied, she discovered that she really, really liked it. How can she get him to keep doing it, even though she knows it’s terribly weird? A lovely, curvy woman in Paris can’t find men to date her...
Sep 19, 2023•46 min•Ep. 882
A woman is enjoying a new friends-with-benefits relationship. She booked them an airBnB, but he had to cancel because his mother had a stroke. Now she feels insecure about him. Should she keep reaching out to try to make the tryst happen? Or wait and give him space? Is he lying about his mother? A sub, masochist woman is into intense head-trips with her dom online-only play partner. He went too far into violent story-telling until she had to end the session. He responded kindly and appropriately...
Sep 12, 2023•54 min•Ep. 881
We open the show with two questions from people who think they are aromantic. One of them is a woman with two sweet boyfriends, but worries she’s not giving each of them what they deserve. The other is a gay man who has never felt the jolt and tingle of new love. Will he ever be swept off his feet? Our caller is starting a female-only book club reading works by, for and about women. A male friend of hers offered to be their naked servant, making drinks and offering snacks to the clothed attendee...
Sep 05, 2023•52 min•Ep. 880
A transman is under deep cover in his hostile, misogynistic, anti-queer work environment. And what’s more, one of his co-workers is probably a closet case who has a crush on the caller! Complicated! Dangerous! A straight man has become dependent on anal sex in order to come. Did porn hijack his erotic life? His previous girlfriend was into it, but how can he find another willing partner? On the Magnum, Dan brings on Sex Therapist Claire Perelman to talk about some of the problems that plague cou...
Aug 29, 2023•53 min•Ep. 879
“Son, I’m open.” A gay man has a great relationship with his son. They hang out together, and the son drops by all the time. The caller has a boyfriend who also get along with his son. But what the son doesn’t know, is that they have an open relationship, so sometimes the caller welcomes other men into his house. What if his son drops by then? Should he explain his open relationship ahead of time? A woman’s boyfriend proposed to her in a public, grand gesture. She hated it. They had never discus...
Aug 22, 2023•57 min•Ep. 878
A woman hooked up with a seemingly nice guy. She asked him to wear a condom, and he said he did. But after he left, she couldn’t find evidence of the condom- no wrapper, nothing. Did he stealth her? Should she call him and ask? Ureaplasma: What’s this fresh new STI? Dan is stumped, so he brings on Dr. Ina Park, his go-to expert on sexually transmitted diseases. On the Magnum, Dan chats with Shallelujah the twitch streamer with a sexy, sexy voice. They talk about parlaying a great voice (and mic)...
Aug 15, 2023•58 min•Ep. 877
Oh Lordy, hear the tale of the twisted teen! He’s been sneaking into neighbors’ houses and stealing their sex toys, including some from elderly women. How dangerous is this kid? Should someone call the cops? How can his long-suffering mother correct him and end this behavior? What do you do when you’re disgusted by your girlfriend squirting? What do you do when you’re repulsed by your boyfriend coming in your mouth? Two separate calls, one conundrum. On the Magnum, Dan and Atlantic writer Faith ...
Aug 08, 2023•54 min•Ep. 876
“Goodbye son, I’m off to Kink Camp!” A gay caller’s dad got divorced, came out as poly, and won’t shut up about it. He introduces the caller to all the girlfriends and brags about his various exploits. Our poor caller doesn’t want to hear the various details. How can he set some reasonable boundaries with his horndog dad? A woman’s spiritual leader is a Buddhist who leads meditation and holds counseling sessions. He’s 20 years her senior, and she thinks he’s kind of hot. He sent her some photos ...
Aug 01, 2023•55 min•Ep. 875
When it comes to love, never ever give up. Unless you really, really should. A woman has been crushed out on her best friend for years. Each time she asks if he feels the same, he gives her an unequivocal “No.” Should she keep pestering him? Continuing in the theme of delusions, a caller heard that semen can prevent hair loss, and anecdotally noticed that his stomach does have quite a lot of hair, right on the target. Dear listeners, he’s been rubbing his own spunk on his head. Will it work? Dan...
Jul 25, 2023•55 min•Ep. 874
See you next week on July 25!
Jul 18, 2023•3 min
Every day a certain number of people learn about sounding. Our first call is from one of these people and he has some questions. Are you next? Listen in. A woman with chronic illness and pain has a calm, pragmatic attitude about her condition. But how can she roll this out to new partners, and when? On the Magnum, do you have a dick, or love someone who has one? Then this is the show for you! Dr. Ashley Winter, our urologist pal is on (with her newborn baby occasionally chiming in,) to answer so...
Jul 11, 2023•59 min•Ep. 873
Happy birthday America, damn you’re kinky! This week’s show features a ton of calls by the kinky, those who love them, or those who are considering becoming them. Let’s dive in. A woman and her bestie are no longer speaking to each other. Why? Because she refuses to help change out the caller’s labia piercing jewelry. A switch woman (she can either be the dom or sub,) isn’t into humiliation. But all her partners assume she is or try to push her into it. How can she be clear about this simple har...
Jul 04, 2023•55 min•Ep. 872
A woman and her husband have quit drinking. Hooray! But now that he’s sober he no longer feels comfortable getting pegged. Boo! How can he lower his inhibitions without the liquid courage? Dan chats with a woman who finally convinced her boyfriend to tell her about his secret, deep, dark, unrealizable fantasy. She and Dan problem-solve how to make it all work for him. Lucky lad… On the Magnum, just when you thought Pride month couldn’t get any gayer, Dan chats with Manuel Betancourt, author of T...
Jun 27, 2023•49 min•Ep. 871
Ah. The old jiz-on-the-couch problem. This time it’s a 13 year-old boy just learning about the wonders of his youthful body. His mother wishes he would learn about socks and tissues. We’ve been hearing the word “narcissistic” hurled at exes a lot these days. But it is a genuine psychiatric disorder, and a rare one. Dan chats with Rebecca Fishbein who wrote an article in Bustle about therapy-speak and how it’s been weaponized lately. On the Magnum, Dan brings back sociology professor Dr. Kelsy Bu...
Jun 20, 2023•50 min•Ep. 870
They are a butch, gender-queer AFAB, kinky pervert. As such, they love going to sex parties. Their boyfriend meanwhile, is straight, vanilla and family oriented. Their relationship is open, and he’s found a lass he wants to bone down with. But the caller doesn’t want him to! It’s a complicated situation, and Dan is here to help. Next up, Dan chats with a caller whose new dom demands that she shave off all her body hair for an erotic “inspection.” But she’s a feminist and has issues with this req...
Jun 13, 2023•57 min•Ep. 869
A straight man detests condoms with all his heart. Even the thought of putting on one of those rubbers makes him deflate like the ears on a 2-day-old balloon rabbit. Is this a fetish of some kind? It prevents him from having sex and it’s bumming him out. There seems to be a fair bit of confusion about silicone sex toys and lube. Can silicone lube harm silicone sex toys? Or do they love each other so much? Dan hops on the phone with Searah Deysach from Chicago’s Early to Bed sex toy store, to set...
Jun 06, 2023•54 min•Ep. 868
A woman feels guilty that she’s only interested in tall men. How can she weed out the little fellas? Our guest this week is author Matt Baume, to discuss his fantastic book “Hi Honey, I’m Homo,” which looks at queer history through the lens of old TV shows. Shows like Soap, Bewitched and All in the Family grappled with gayness in secret and overt ways that reflect the historical context of when they aired. And because this is the Savage Lovecast, Dan makes Matt answer a question about fucking tr...
May 30, 2023•54 min•Ep. 867
A gay man is simultaneously weirded out and turned on by using the word “daddy” with his boyfriend. Should he stop immediately? A woman’s husband cheated on her and it breaks her heart. She can’t divorce him because she would get deported. How can she stay married and stay sane for the next three years when she can become a legal citizen? On the Magnum, we take a deep dive into the freaky, freaky world of the animal kingdom with zoologist and best-selling author Lucy Cooke. Her book “Bitch: On t...
May 23, 2023•50 min•Ep. 866
A small time influencer has just been propositioned by an aspiring “pay pig” asking her to be his findom. He backed up this offer with $5 for coffee. Enticing! Should she do it? And if so, what are the rules in keeping the relationship lucrative and ethical? The other day? This guy was wanking? And guess what came out of his wiener along with the usual stuff…Blood! This call is disgusting. But Dan answers it, and manages to make it even grosser. On the Magnum, uh oh! It’s time for a Second Opini...
May 16, 2023•51 min•Ep. 865
A woman suddenly started having orgasms while using the elliptical machine at the gym. To help explain this potentially embarrassing phenomenon, Dan brings on Dr. Debby Herbenick, author of The Coregasm Workout: The Revolutionary Method for Better Sex Through Exercise . And you now have a new goal. A dom woman and her bi male sub are having a trouble trying to find a male unicorn. They have time constraints, and they live in a suburb, not a city. The guys they meet either can’t get it up, or gho...
May 09, 2023•58 min•Ep. 864
A very vanilla woman is so vanilla that she “doesn’t know what a kink is.” That’s really vanilla! Here’s a complicated three-way situation: He is the top with his husband. But he is the sub for his Dom boyfriend. When the three get together, who does what? On the Magnum we welcome back Dr. Carlton Thomas, the intrepid gastroenterologist who fears no anal sex question. Example! One caller wants his butt to feel raw from rough use. Then, a woman wants to stretch her asshole for her boyfriend and w...
May 02, 2023•51 min•Ep. 863
A gay man living in the south is having a heckuva time trying to find a trans man to hook up with. Also he doesn’t want to come across as a chaser… Hear the unpleasant tale of the careless, selfish dom who boxed his lover on the ears twice (after being told not to) and took some non-consensual pics as well. You hate to see it. On the Magnum, Dan brings on non-binary the comedian Mae Martin. They talk about “the gender thing” - gender fluidity, top surgery, the difference between sex and gender, ...
Apr 25, 2023•49 min•Ep. 862
Is it feasible to start your pro-Domme career at age 43? This married woman with kids wants to get back in the life. A lesbian is married to a woman with a Catholic upbringing and actively religious family. They live in a country where they have to pay dues to the church. When her wife goes to Catholic ceremonies like baptisms and funerals, the caller feels white hot fury. Should she let her wife go with the conservative flow, or fight it? Dan’s answer…may shock you. On the Magnum, Dan chats wit...
Apr 18, 2023•59 min•Ep. 861
A theme emerges! Sadly, the theme is seeing your dad’s dick. Would you be able to pick out your dad’s dick in a dick line-up? No, you would not. A woman’s brother is about to do time for pedophilia. Compounding the tragedies here, the caller has lost all sense of her own sexuality due to her brother’s crimes. How can she get back to herself? On the Magnum, Dan chats with artist, writer and gay activist Leo Herrera on gay men using words like “pussy” and “mangina” to refer to their butts. They al...
Apr 11, 2023•56 min•Ep. 860
Have you ever been to a terribly complicated orgy? This one promises to be epic. Hear about the game they invented called “Spin the Bottom.” A trans woman has started feeling claustrophobic when she goes down on either her male or female partner. Oral is her favorite! What gives? On the Magnum and the Micro, Dan welcomes professor and sex researcher Dr. Lori Botto to talk about the nature of asexuality. Is it mutable? Can you be in a relationship if you’re ace? On the Magnum, Mistress Matisse is...
Apr 04, 2023•56 min•Ep. 859
