A young woman slept with her pal's ex about a year ago in one drunken evening. Now she is wracked with guilt. Should she tell her? A gay proofreader lives in a repressive country. He is tasked with fixing grammatical and spelling errors. One of his clients has written a novel riddled with homophobic tropes and forehead-slapping inaccuracies about gay people. Should he bring this to the writer's attention, or keep his head down and stick to "they're" vs. "their" mistakes? On the Magnum, Dan inter...
Nov 05, 2019•55 min•Ep. 680
A tale of two subs: What to do when both people in a couple are subs? Find one dom to rule them all? Take turns? A woman is super-duper annoyed that her Trump-lovin' brother is throwing a gender reveal party. Are they inherently unacceptable? On the Magnum version of the show, Dan casts about for a straight man to help him answer questions, and finds actor/comedian/author Michael Ian Black to discuss infidelity, betrayal and REVENGE. Also, a lesbian with Asperger's can't tell if her co-worker is...
Oct 29, 2019•53 min•Ep. 679
A woman was apparently dating Genghis Khan. He told her he had had a vasectomy, but she got pregnant anyway. And so had a bunch of other women he dated. Her lawyer says she has a battery case. Her friends tell her to chill out. What do you think? A married woman has a very dear gay male friend. She wants to go on vacation with him. But is this too much? Too close? Too weird? On the Magnum, are we sick of drag yet? No. No, we are not. Dan brings on the ever-delightful Simon Doonan to talk about t...
Oct 22, 2019•50 min•Ep. 678
A woman has vowed to never date a Trump voter. But she lives in a small conservative town, and she's getting lonely... A woman did some sex work a couple years ago. She's dating someone new and wonders if, when or how to tell him. On the Magnum, Dan chats with Joan Price, author of "Naked at Our Age" about how to combat the effects of early menopause. Poor unicorn! Her couple broke up! Should she ask the lady in the (former) couple if she can continue to be with her ex? Awkward! 206-302-2064 Thi...
Oct 15, 2019•50 min•Ep. 677
An open-minded but shy woman has a gaggle of friends who all talk about sticking their fingers in their boyfriends butts- to everyone's delight. But the caller isn't into it. Is she depriving her boyfriend of this singular pleasure? A woman got a tattoo and felt turned on by the experience. Her husband reaped the benefits of this lust later that night. But is it wrong to secretly perv on her tattoo artist? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Elle Chase, author of "Curvy Girl Sex" about LOVING YOUR BOD...
Oct 08, 2019•52 min•Ep. 676
An anonymous LinkedIn contact has asked a woman if she would be his FinDom. He would give her money every week in a form of submission to her. But he refuses to reveal his identity. Should she take him up on it? Would you? A gay man has an out-of-town friend who is straight, conservative and engaged to be married. But when the caller was checking out gay hook-up apps he discovered his friend there. Should the caller reach out to his closeted friend and let him know he knows? Try to stop the wedd...
Oct 01, 2019•53 min•Ep. 675
It's your typical story: Man has sex with girl who has only 2 fingers on one of her hands. Man never calls girl again because he only wanted casual sex anyway. Years later, man feels guilty for not calling girl with disability because he worries she will think he ghosted her because of her weird hand. Man calls homosexual sex advice podcaster for absolution. A man and his wife are embarking on some sex club explorations. Dan chats with the man about how to stay safe and keep his head together an...
Sep 24, 2019•50 min•Ep. 674
A married woman has just hosted her mother-in-law in their small apartment. After seeing her husband and his mother interact, she just doesn't fell like having any sex at all. How can she clear out the in-law vibes? Morning! A woman emerges from sleep in the full throes of an orgasm. But her dream was mundane and not even close to sexy. What in god's name is going on here? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Lehmiller of the Kinsey Institute about whether men and women are equally kinky. And, a yo...
Sep 17, 2019•58 min•Ep. 673
A woman's boyfriend used to achieve orgasm with ease. But now he can't come from penetration. The caller worries that in her boyfriend's eyes, she has become the madonna, when she used to be the whore. Dan speaks with a bisexual man, whose first attempt at unicorning (yes, we verbbed the word "unicorn,") went poorly, mainly due to his straight couple maybe getting a little too drunky? Anyway, next time will go better, brave unicorn! On the Magnum: Dental dams- Nobody uses them. That is the conse...
Sep 10, 2019•55 min•Ep. 672
A gay man is fed up with all the public sex at gay pride parades! It's bad PR! Enough already! Will Dan agree? Listen and find out. A woman is planning to marry. Her fiancé has a lot less money than she does, and they maintain separate bank accounts. When she marries, should they combine their finances? Should she get a prenup? Dan brings in Paul Sullivan- the "Wealth Matters" columnist from the NYT- to discuss these potentially thorny issues. On the Magnum, Dan Savage (a known homosexual male) ...
Sep 03, 2019•55 min•Ep. 671
What do you do when love being single, but also want that new relationship energy? A woman vents some righteous fury that many women don't find short men attractive. IT'S NOT FAIR. On the Magnum, Dan chats with the very amazing RIVAL but BELOVED advice columnist E. Jean Carroll. She has been writing "Ask E. Jean" for Elle Magazine since 1993, and recently came out with her book What Do We Need Men For----A Modest Proposal. It exposes the hideous men she's encountered, including our current presi...
Aug 27, 2019•53 min
A 76 year-old woman wonders if everyone is doing polyamory these days, or if there are any monogamous couples left. A woman's twin brother has become a white supremacist, and is getting sucked in to a very scary community. Dan brings on Christian Picciolini, who himself was recruited and eventually left the white power movement. He now combats extreme hate groups, with a message compassion and understanding. On the Magnum, Dan chats with writer Zachary Zane, on the challenges and resources for c...
Aug 20, 2019•56 min•Ep. 669
A man keeps sending his female friends sexual texts and pics, later apologizing saying it was a mistake and sent to the wrong person. Both our caller and podcast host know better. A man's husband will sometimes wake in the middle of the night and have wild, uninhibited sex. Then he forgets it happened in the morning. Is it wrong for the caller to enjoy these midnight romps? On the Magnum, Dan chats about one of his favorite subjects: blow jobs- with comedian Jacqueline Novak. And, a bi man's 16 ...
Aug 13, 2019•50 min•Ep. 668
Is it common for straight men to be "secretly into dick?" Because that's what this woman's boyfriend is. A transwoman got together with a guy in a dungeon. But she forgot to tell him that she is trans. Her lover told her it would be wise to reveal this detail early on. Should she? Must she? On the Magnum, a middle-aged woman is too damn horny. Dan brings on the ever-helpful Dr. Debby Herbenick to see if there's a medical cause or source of relief. And, a "poly-minded" man is only poly-minded whe...
Aug 06, 2019•52 min•Ep. 667
A woman is tormented that her partner of 7 years has not learned how to pee without spraying the area. Dan's response is both charitable and practical. A 70 year-old man is in an open relationship with his wife. He is communicating with a 30 year-old woman online who lives out of town. How can he verify her identity without offending her? Also, he doesn't want to take advantage of her. But who will be taking advantage of whom? Now. Did you notice the episode number? On the Magnum, Dan interviews...
Jul 30, 2019•51 min•Ep. 666
A woman has been dating a man for 4 months. She just read on his public blog that he thinks he isn't clicking with her. Should she admit she read his blog? Why would he write such a thing? A gay man encountered a willing slave in the bathroom at an orgy. (As one does.) It turns out this slave wants to be in a 24/7 slave/master relationship. He is also closeted, and politically conservative. Sooooo....is his masochism born out of self-hatred? How can (or should) the caller help this twisted soul?...
Jul 23, 2019•51 min•Ep. 665
A reasonable woman is about to visit her over-the-top Christian family. Her sister has invited her to join a book club when she's there. Guess what the book is! Should the caller sit through her sister's stealth Bible study, or find a way to politely decline? Or perhaps there's yet another way... A man used to be the cartoon editor for his college newspaper. This was before he got woke, and he is now mortified to recall some nasty anti-gay comics that he published. Should he apologize? Submit ne...
Jul 16, 2019•56 min•Ep. 664
A man still has hot videos he took of his ex. He loves his current girlfriend, but the sex isn't nearly as good. How wrong is it to view the historical footage? A straight man has HAD IT UP TO HERE with all this "they/them" stuff! And sometimes, you use "they/them" and they still get mad! "What are we doing here, Dan?" On the Magnum, Dan chats with Rob Walker- Human Resource columnist for Lifehacker, about dealing with various schmuckos at work. Also, a woman and her fiancé happily trade chores ...
Jul 09, 2019•51 min•Ep. 663
It's the One-Minute Wonder Show! That's right. Your calls were one minute or less. Dan's answers were 2 minutes or less. We blasted through so much, it feels like a blur. Blowing air in vaginas, toxic Drag Race fans, squirting cleanup, anal skin tags, finding that clit, how to avoid getting things stuck up your butt, jizz enemas, micro infidelities, orgasm farts, figging, Gallagher, sounding- this is just a fraction of the rich content you'll hear today. We are all exhausted, actually. 206-302-2...
Jul 02, 2019•52 min•Ep. 662
Just in time for your pride parade, it's the all gay episode! Calls by, for and about queer people. We got nervous lesbians who are scared to introduce the girlfriend to their moms, we got homos who come too soon, or get spooked by conventionally attractive men. Look! It's a bisexual woman who has never been with a woman before and wants to "scratch the itch" while her boyfriend is out of town. A woman whose trans husband has been outed at work, gay cleaning products...wait. What? Gay cleaning p...
Jun 25, 2019•54 min•Ep. 661
A gay man is dating a self-described "Sex Pig." His antics in public are epic. The caller wants to figure out if he can learn to be more carefree and uninhibited or negotiate some rules to please them both. Hear and learn from the cautionary tale of the dutiful daughter housesitting for her parents, and the hidden videocamera. On the Magnum, Dan stammers through a conversation about a topic that makes him feel...uncomfortable: NUDITY. Stéphane Deschenes from The Naturist Living Show podcast trie...
Jun 18, 2019•57 min•Ep. 660
With the ever-charming and fearsome Mistress Matisse. She came to our studio to help Dan answer questions about bruises (wanted and unwanted,) gang bangs, the nasty kind of doms you'll meet on Reddit, rough sex when you're pregnant and the proper care and washing of your ball-gag. And more! And, on the Magnum, Dan chats with historian and author Peter Tupper on his new book A Lover's Pinch: A Cultural History of Sadomasochism. Yowwwwch! 206-302-2064 This episode is brought to you by Talkspace- o...
Jun 11, 2019•54 min•Ep. 659
Here's a conundrum: A black, gay man is married to his white husband. They want to dive into threesomes, but the black man is only attracted to white men and the white man is only attracted to black men. So you see. This is a real pickle. Meanwhile, a straight man has fantasies where he is a gay leather daddy, and his real life butch lesbian friend is his sub "boy." Is this a thought crime? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Fast Company freelance journalist Sean Captain about the sad demise of Tumbl...
Jun 04, 2019•53 min•Ep. 658
Here are the Savage Lovecast we've noticed that we'll get a bunch of calls on a particular subject all at once. This week it was abortion and weddings. A caller asks if we should just sit on our hands and let Alabama and the other states hijacked by their far right politicians reap the political cost of criminalizing abortion. Hear Dan counsel a gay man who is getting married. A straight couple who the caller considered friends revealed that they couldn't come to the wedding because it violates ...
May 28, 2019•52 min•Ep. 657
A woman is dating a man who used to be a sex addict. He slept with hundreds of women. Now their relationship is solid and monogamous, but his many former lovers keep texting him and trying to keep in touch. The caller feels threatened and creeped out. A man has started going to hot yoga to get in shape. The room is filled with gorgeous women stretching and sweating and wearing next to nothing. Is the sexual vibe just in the caller's head? How can he approach some of them without looking like som...
May 21, 2019•54 min•Ep. 656
A man and his wife want to have kids. He would like to have a threesome before they do. Is it wrong to issue an ultimatum: "NO KIDS until we have that threeway?" Dan chats with Dr. Landon Trost from the Mayo clinic about vasectomies- how reversible are they? On the Magnum, Dan has a long conversation with a lesbian whose parents forced her to endure "conversion therapy" for years. She talks about the experience and together she and Dan hash out how to approach her relationship with her parents t...
May 14, 2019•55 min•Ep. 655
A woman keeps getting told to go home after she hooks up in the middle of the night. Don't any of these gentleman know how to make breakfast? A woman has learned that her beloved aunt has been having a lesbian affair for decades. Some but not all of her family knows. Should the caller tell everyone? At family gatherings? Because she just can't keep her mouth shut? Will she heed Dan's stern advice? On the Magnum, a woman wonders if the best orgasm of her life, way back when she was 16, was due to...
May 07, 2019•49 min•Ep. 654
A kinky woman enjoys having slaves. But the guy she really likes is vanilla. It didn't work out. This is sad. Does being kinky mean you can't have vanilla love too? A school teacher and her boyfriend want to go to a sex club. But she's worried about running into parents of her students, or school administration. How cautious should this sexy schoolmarm be? On the Magnum, Dan chats with sociologist and author Nicholas A. Christakis about his book: Blueprint: The Evolutionary Origins of a Good Soc...
Apr 30, 2019•54 min•Ep. 653
A woman claims that over 90% of the time, her casual hook-ups end with the man orgasming, and she gets...nothing. And then! When she asks for a little reciprocity, these men accuse her of being a demanding princess. Meanwhile, another straight woman loves it when her men say no at first. She loves the chase and her ultimate victory. Is this a kink? Is it something she can work into her long term relationships? On the Magnum, Dan speaks with writer and social researcher Dr. Wednesday Martin, abou...
Apr 23, 2019•53 min•Ep. 652
A bisexual man and his girlfriend want to try a threeway with another man. But he has never been with a man before and feels anxious. The girlfriend just feels turned on. He wishes she would suppress her desire and support him in this trying time. A woman's friend is beginning the process of coming out as a trans woman. But she wants to be help accountable. She asked the caller to send a coming out announcement to family and friends if the trans woman doesn't do it herself by a certain time. Is ...
Apr 16, 2019•57 min•Ep. 651
