Recovery Radio KMP300. Ah, yes. You are listening to the recovery radio podcast on KMP3. I am a member of Alcoholics Anonymous and I will be your host. You can email me at sarcastic bigbook@gmail. You can follow me on Instagram at sarcastic.a.book. As always, glad you're here with me now. Don't know if your day is just starting, if it's ending, if you're right somewhere in the middle. Maybe you're riding a bike. Maybe you're baking a cake. Maybe you're eating leftover pumpkin pie.
I don't know what you're doing. Maybe you're curled up in a ball, balling your eyes out. Lord knows I've done it. Whatever you're doing, glad we're together. Now, if yesterday was Thanksgiving for you, I hope it was a good one. Yesterday was Thanksgiving for me. And um got to tell you, I know this is unusual for Thanksgiving. So, um, this normally doesn't happen on Thanksgiving, but I just have to share with you. I ate a lot. And um, it was fun. It was fun to throw caution to the wind.
My uh medical doctor said that's healthy eating to sometimes go ballistic on food but to not do it on a regular basis. It's a part of healthy eating which was fascinating. So I kept that in mind yesterday as I shoveled pie into my mouth. No, truth be told, I didn't go crazy, but I did eat delicious food. My wife is a incredible cook and she makes things taste very unhealthy even though they're not. So, that's the truth. But it was great. And uh she loves watching the dog show.
So, we watched the dog show and um that was fun. We have our little traditions that we do. Anyways, hope you had a good Thanksgiving and um well, we also played cards and I made up a character um while we were playing cards that ends every sentence with or is that just something I read on the web? So, we were playing cards and I was like, are you cheating again or is that just something I read on the web? Bottom line, we've been saying it a lot in our home and it's making us laugh. Anyways,
grateful I'm sober. Grateful I have no desire to drink today. That is the big news. No desire to drink today. Didn't cross my mind yesterday. There was a time when I was even in sobriety, even before the obsession returned and went away again. There was a time I was fixated on that. I was just monitoring it. Do I want to drink right now? I don't. I shared about it on here a long time
ago. The first event I went to that involved alcohol was a wedding that I remember and boy I was I was just I think I shared that Cat Stevens had this song called the boy with the moon and star in his head and he mentions cider and wine being at this celebration and I for some reason that was comforting. kept telling myself, well, you know, I don't know. I don't know why it was comforting, but it was comforting.
So, the whole time I was at this wedding, I was just holding my glass of apple cider thinking, you know, hey, if Cat Steven mentions, it must be true. Anyways, didn't cross my mind yesterday, and I don't take that for granted.
So today I thought I would talk about um it's kind of an analogy that I have kind of a way of thinking about something that I have that maybe I've articulated to my wife but that's about it and it's you know I've shared on here I'm real deep thinker and have to figure stuff out and you know things are complicated and complex andah you know all this just so for that reason to keep it very simple for myself, I have these really simple visual analogies that help me tremendously. And um
one of them is this. One of them is that God's in a parked car. He's parked in the moment. And if I'm going 5 miles an hour, I can reach him, but it's not that comfortable. It's not that easy. If I'm going 10 miles an hour, it's a lot harder. If I'm going 50 m hour, I can't really converse because he's parked in the present moment. That's what's real and that's therefore where God must be. So I really think about that as I go through the day.
Very aware of the fact when I'm going 10, 15, 20, five, I want to slow down. get present so that I could really clearly converse and hear. And that works for me and it also works for how I interact with others. And that's how I learned this really is that if you know it's kind of the same thing if you're if you're going five and someone's going 20, you can't really communicate with them either. And to me, it's all one and the same.
Can't really reach someone if they're going 20 and I'm parked or if I'm if if if they're going 10 and I'm not moving or vice versa. It just doesn't happen. I have noticed. And how this helps me so much is that when you're parked, when you're in the moment, the first thing you realize is that very few people are in the moment. The more present you are, the more you realize the lack of presence. very rare that someone's not going even five or 10 or 15.
And I don't really attempt to I guess I'm kind of looking for as I go through the day I'm looking for someone to be slowed down enough to be able to connect with. It's rare. Half of that is sad and that's one side of the coin, but the other half of it is it's an incredible opportunity. In a way, I just kind of feel like I'm I mean, it's just an incredible opportunity to just learn when to shut up and listen. For example, if somebody's going 50, I don't I don't get in there. I don't try
anymore. There's no point. Somebody's going 50 miles an hour, I let them talk. few exceptions because I've just seen that it's feudal. You're not going to reach them. They're going too fast. So I'm always just kind of waiting for somebody to slow down enough to interact with because then I feel like in terms of being useful to God I really feel like everything other than that is just noise. If I'm going 50 and you're going 50 and you know, it's just a bunch of noise.
When I first got silver, I was going 100. And then I did my inventory and I slowed down to about 50. Then I did my fifth step. I slowed down. Sometimes I was stopped and I would speed up again 25 50 for a while. It's taking some time but not that much time. It's really a matter of doing the steps for me. That really helped slow it down. So today I can go real slow and it's comfortable. cuz everything's always okay when you're parked no matter what
because that's where God is. So, I wanted to share that today. I've never said that out loud, like I said, except for maybe once to my wife. So, I wanted to put it out there and see if that helped somebody. How how you slow down in my experience is by doing and living the principles contained in the 12 steps. That's how I slow down. Get myself unblocked. Selfishness. It's like gasoline makes your car go faster. Selfishness. Fear. It's like stepping on the gas. Sometimes you're going in reverse.
Sometimes you're going forward. But it's stepping on the gas. Fear. If you don't want to go, if you don't want to call it that, if you have a euphemism for fear, if you want to call it a concern or just a worry or something, it's fear in my view. And it just speeds up the car. Doubt, same thing. Resentment, it's hitting the gas. remorse, shame, trying to control. Every time I try to control, I hit the
gas. Whether it's the past or the future, every time I get into the role of trying to play God, I am hitting the accelerator. So try to keep my foot on the brake and uh put it in park as often as I can and then I have access to all the resources inside me present and I can have fun. cuz I'm not trying to control anything. I could just uh be. So, I don't know. There it is. I think that's it. I'm going to fold up the cupcake stand now. I'm not doing anything today. I'm resting today.
For me, resting will probably involve working on a couple projects here and there around the house. It feels good. Anyways, if you're hurting, I'm sorry that you are. If you're in fear, there is a tool that I've learned that works. Realize you're playing God. Ask God to remove it and go be the light best you can. I read something from Emma Fox yesterday that said, "If you want to know what it is you believe in, it's easy. Just watch
what you do. Pay attention to what you do because that is what you believe. So if you want to change what you do, change your beliefs. Evan Fox knows a couple things. I've not I've noticed. All right, I'm out of here. I'm going to go relax now. I got to go hit the break. Keep it in park as best I can today. I want to give a shout out to uh Happy Joy and three and uh Black Rhinos
podcast greater than yourself. So for gratitudes podcast, anonymous podcast want to thank the people who are having sarcastic bigbook meetings on Zoom. I want to thank the people who are supporting my Instagram page and all of my endeavors so much. I appreciate it so much. Means a lot. You can follow me sarcastic.a.book. Bunch of silliness on there. And um I've been making a lot of fake books on there.
And I've started to put together a book of the fake books that I'm going to put out because it's fun and it makes me laugh. and um drop me an email. I love the emails that I get. It all means a lot. The messages, the emails. Um sarcastic bigbook atgmail. You can go to sarcasticbigbook.com for all the information about all of it. And um I never plugged that, but that's my website. Anyways, I'll say it to anyone who needs to hear it. Everything's okay. Everything's okay.
I know a lot of times it doesn't look like it or feel like it. I know that. That's why I say that. I say it because I've spent years of my life not feeling like everything was okay. That's where this thing that I say at the end of the show comes from. Comes from being very aware of how often it doesn't feel like everything's okay. So, I just wanted to say it and um hope you have a wonderful weekend in every single way.
And um and on that note, I am going to go try to live a life that was worth saving. And I hope you'll do the same. Good night. Heat. Heat. I'm happy. Heat. Heat. Oh,