If you often oscillate between opposites: You’re too hard or too soft. Overconfident one day. Self-doubting the next. It may come down to your Father Wound … In Campbell’s Monomyth, the hero’s journey begins in leaving the Status Quo—the metaphorical home of your father. The hero (your ego) seeks out a mentor, or Secondary Father , to fill in the gaps of your masculinity left by your upbringing. This can be seen in the types of men you’re drawn to… Most men’s personal development stops there. Bu...
Apr 08, 2026•49 min•Ep. 168
Each of us have a Master and Slave archetype within us. They represent two opposite ways of evaluating reality, and therefore making decisions. The more you operate from Master Morality, the more true you are being to your nature as a man. I break down Nietzsche's concept of Nobility here and how it relates to male biology, modern society, and expressing yourself as a man. This was originally recorded 5 years ago while I was awaiting the birth of my daughter. (I edited out the time-references th...
Mar 25, 2026•1 hr 15 min•Ep. 114
You've been here before: She's upset and talking nonsense. Every male instinct in you wants to correct her contradictions (and prove YOU are right). It's a trap. Uncle Carl offers us a better mental model that makes all the nonsense make sense. Understanding it will help you 1) neutralizing her arguments, 2) handling her unconscious so that future arguments are less necessary. And be the Happy Genius of Your Household. Text version: ruwando.substack.com Btw, if you're a married man with children...
Mar 20, 2026•34 min•Ep. 219
Your social brain "thinks" that if you are extra hard on yourself it will motivate you to do better. But the opposite is true: The more you make yourself feel bad, the more you unconsciously do things to justify bad feelings. Shame kills your mojo more than anything else. Kills performance. Disconnects you from your instincts and "soul." This episode is on freeing yourself from shame considering: * Evolutionary basis of this social emotion. * Why self-shaming backfires. (Transactional Analysis) ...
Feb 03, 2026•49 min•Ep. 218
"Men's Personal Development" wasn't a thing even one generation ago. It became so due to shifts in culture and technology. It also is a lens on the changes in male collective consciousness. This episode analyzes the 4 recent iterations of men's work--culturally, psychologically, and technologically-- and what it says about where male psychology is headed. Text summary is available at: ruwando.substack.com Anti-stress/brain chemistry course for men: go.anabolicpsyche.com Get the course for $17, d...
Jan 19, 2026•1 hr 3 min•Ep. 217
After a weird COVID relationship, a friend lent me a copy of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus . While dated in terms of style, I was shocked at how useful it was 20 years later. I was also surprised that John had a lot to say about semen retention when I interviewed him. Little did I know, he has a deeply spiritual (and sexual) past. On that note, you can get Arousal Control Mastery (normally $497) for free if you take and complete the Anabolic Psyche mini-course within a timeframe. https...
Jan 13, 2026•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 84
Is there a formula for getting your way (with people or circumstances)? In my experience, there are certain qualities that make someone particularly magnetic in this sense. I draw an actionable metaphor from the physics formula for literal magnetism, Get the text version with breakdown and summary at ruwando.substack.com Anabolic Psyche 2.0: go.anabolicpsyche.com + Get my Arousal Control program for free (if you complete Anabolic Psyche.) Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.c...
Jan 05, 2026•1 hr 1 min•Ep. 216
Patrick was in a dark place when met—ultra Nice Guy submissive tendencies, deep feelings of undeservingness, enmeshing Mother Complex, and acting out with p*rn and prostitutes. Six months later, his life reflected massive transformation—epic dating life, greater respect at work, and feelings of deservedness. We recorded this about a year after when he chose to settle down with his now wife. (I had also just had my first child.) We discuss male transformation and stepping into the “King” archetyp...
Dec 29, 2025•45 min•Ep. 166
Dropping an old favorite in honor of my anniversary today. How to Help Her Into Her Feminine covers what a man can do to help a woman move from her competitive (“masculine”) self to her interdependent (“feminine”) self. It draws on some fringe lessons from BDSM, evolutionary biology, and case studies from many guys I’ve helped. I recorded it shortly after our daughter was born. I wonder if you can hear the drop in testosterone in my voice. (00:00:00): Irony of Attraction Shifts (00:04:53): If Ma...
Dec 22, 2025•1 hr 46 min•Ep. 148
The literal need to "protect and provide" is mostly obsolete in modern day. But women still desire to be contained when it comes to emotions, and to large degree, perceptions. One of the huge differences between committed and not-so-committed relationships is the man's role in directing reality. Only then can a woman really feel her feelings, be present, be in her feminine. It’s about a man’s role in containing a woman’s reality—All the heady, but sometimes necessary, parts of life that prevent ...
Dec 18, 2025•49 min•Ep. 170
When I was 23, I fell in love with a drug addict. She was sexy and interesting. But more than that, she was WILD. If my life was a movie, she was cast as the Manic Pixie Dream Girl—the adolescent male fantasy of an the open-hearted nymph who saves the non-hero from mediocrity. The MPDG highlights a common male psychological wound. She also shows us how such a man can heal this wound, if he can avoid the emotional trap she represents. An abbreviated text version of this episode can be found at ru...
Dec 12, 2025•46 min•Ep. 214
Disney princesses are different today. So is our culture's Feminine Ideal. Mrs. Meepagala and I debate on how these different female role models are imprinting the next generation of women, including our daughter. Tomorrow I'm posting a concise article on the 3 different types female role models and their message to women on substack. Subscribe to get it delivered to your inbox: ruwando.substack.com If you're a woman looking to find the one in 2026, check out my wife's new book: idaretolove.com ...
Dec 02, 2025•43 min•Ep. 213
What makes one psychologically ready for a committed relationship? Jung’s essay, “The Love Problem of a Student”, discusses the early stages social dynamics that have become common to us 100 years later— “free love” vs monogamy, infidelity, a woman’s dilemma of career vs. family. 00:37 The Love Problem of a Student 03:41 Love and Instincts 06:23 Homosexuality and Human Nature 29:24 Psychological Maturity and Relationships 33:00 Psychological Impact of Early Sexual Experiences 44:50 Older Women a...
Nov 27, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 212
A recent epiphany has made me decide to move off visual media consolidate my podcast with substack. It shouldn't change anything for you, though there's a *possibility* you won't see my new episodes pop up. (If there's an RSS feed issue.) You can prevent this by subscribing at ruwando.substack.com There you can stay updated on future podcast episodes, accompanying writing, livestreams, and book excerpts. (You can customize notifications to receive only one or the other.) Get my book + bonuses: O...
Nov 26, 2025•8 min
Here I read an essay by Carl Jung, "Woman As Soul", + give my commentary on what it means and how we can use it. This is part of the source material for my next book, ANIMA: The Five Aspects of the Feminine-- A Guide For Men on Female Psychology. Get free excerpts by subcribing at ruwando.substack.com Or get an advance copy of ANIMA by purchasing my other book, ORGSM, A Memoir at orgsmbook.com Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
Nov 20, 2025•1 hr 5 min
Reality is a set of agreements. This is a reading + commentary on a new post on substack on the nature of subjective reality: The process of brainwashing used by ideologies as seen in politics, communities, and of course, cults. It includes from excerpts from my book, ORGSM, A Memoir . I'll be posting more analyses + excerpts from my next book, ANIMA: The 5 Aspects of the Feminine Unconscious on substack: Ruwando.substack.com Get my new book + $100 of bonuses at orgsmbook.com Get full access to ...
Nov 13, 2025•28 min
My book publishes Oct 31. You can get it at a discount + free bonuses: 1. How To Brainwash Yourself course that pulls mind control principles from my cult experience for positive identity transformation. 2. An advance copy of Anima: 5 Aspects of the Feminine Unconscious . My next book (to publish 2026) on female psychology. 3. My entire premium meditation library from MindValley/Insight Timer. To redeem visit: orgsmbook.com . ORGSM, A Memoir is my true story of being in a female-led cult where I...
Oct 28, 2025•8 min
I connected with Sascha over a post he made of “why women in their 40’s are the unhappiest ever.” Whether that’s true or not, it’s food for important conversation about modern dating and relationships. Sascha Haert is a coach for women. Tbh, I used to have a lot of judgement of men who coach women (and of women who only coach men). But he has a lot of great insight on: Why successful women hardly find love, what’s important in the bedroom, why women resent men so much these days, how woman makes...
Aug 18, 2025•55 min
Working with horses is the most profound thing I've done in many years. Most recently I've been training with Sergio Faerman. Sergio is a former semi-pro MMA fighter, horse therapy trainer, and “gaucho” (Latin American tradition of cowboy). He and I first met training MMA, and I’ve been training in horse riding with him.We discuss why men need to learn horseriding, how horses teach you to be a healthy leader (horses teach you how to be balanced in dominance and empathy), what therapy with horses...
Aug 04, 2025•1 hr 10 min
Justin Nault is a nutrition therapist. We have a fascinating discussion on metabolic health, hormones, nutrition, and the mind.Justin on IG: @justinnaultofficialHis supplement company: iamclovis.com00:00 Guest Introduction: Who Is Justin?00:56 Justin's Music Career and Body Dysmorphia01:33 Journey Into Health and Wellness04:10 Plant Medicine and Life Changes04:46 Nutrition and the Paleo Diet05:42 Savannah's Story and the Birth of a New Mission08:55 The Problem with Seed Oils12:32 Understanding H...
May 05, 2025•53 min
Netflix’s Adolescence has sparked much debate around masculinity. Is it feminist propaganda? Or an important awakening around the “manosphere”? I analyze the series from the perspective of the male collective unconscious: What the show got right, what it got wrong, and how it fits in with modern culture, including Andrew Tate, redpill, the manosphere, Jordan Peterson, Joe Rogan, and more. Video version: https://youtu.be/N3PQ_K84kk4?si=OLqIzdmq0YOwOCE_ 00:00 Introduction to Adolescence on Netflix...
Apr 09, 2025•58 min
Why do women like possessive men? Miiska returns to the podcast to discuss dating and relationships. Plus, his major life changes: his new found fame and recent death of his father. Miiska Van Renterghem is Finland’s #1 men’s coach and personal development podcaster. He’s also a good buddy and former client of mine. Hack your brain chemistry for unshakable confidence: Anabolic Psyche mini-course only $ 12AnabolicPsyche.com 00:00 Miiska’s story of becoming masculine 03:45 Shifting from liberal to...
Mar 22, 2025•55 min
Lucilla was once Denmark's top female pickup artist. Now she's a worldwide midwife (and the wife of Andreas from last episode). We discuss her unusual Journey as a woman in the early pickup community, her approach to developing confidence, social skills, and authenticity. 00:00 - Pickup, coaching 02:00 - Social skills, dating in teens 05:20 - Is dating easier for guys or girls? 06:30 - Who needs love when you have the game 07:40 - The game or manipulations 17:30 - Authenticity is next level of t...
Nov 25, 2024•1 hr 2 min
For many men, their introduction to personal development was the infamous “pickup community”. My friend “Worldwide Psychologist” Andreas and I speak on our experiences, good and bad, and how it led to deeper understandings in self-discovery. We also cover why we replay childhood relations, installing values into your kids, and why staying connected to yourself is important. 00:00 Discovering who you are 04:00 Discovering yourself through forums 06:45 Pick up community 08:00 Benefits of tinder 11...
Nov 11, 2024•1 hr
Higher consciousness through sex? If you've ever felt in an altered state from falling in love, taking MDMA, or really great sex, then you may have experienced what Timothy Leary called the “Neurosomatic Circuit”—the state of consciousness that comes with a deep connection between mind and body, typically through sustaining sexual arousal. This episode covers how sexual arousal can be used to enhance your emotional state, via lessons I learned intensively studying sexuality in my early 20s. Such...
Oct 29, 2024•1 hr 29 min
My friends Kris and Lily came back from a breakup to coming back together and now happily married with two kids. In order to do so, they both had to drastically change themselves and their reality. We discuss major turning points in a romantic relationship, balancing ideologies in a relationship, and some key (and possibly taboo) principles about how men and women can find deep harmony together. If you’re having relationship issues and you want to fix it, apply to Lead Your Family— small group p...
Oct 16, 2024•1 hr 29 min
"A man's beauty represents inner functional truths: his face shows what he can do." (Albert Camus) Trauma (inhibitions to normal function) shows up in out nonverbal communication— facial expressions and posture. We can read one's emotions through their resting faces and micro-expressions. Here's how to read, and modify yours from trauma to ease and confidence. 00:00 - Intro 01:40 - Body language - first impressions 06:05 - A man's looks demonstrate what he can do 11:05 - How to understand trauma...
Oct 07, 2024•56 min
Why do you get nervous? Do you “choke” in important moments? i.e. Meeting someone you’re attracted to, public speaking, conflict or competition? How to “conquer your inner weakness” really comes down to how to change your stress response. The episode breaks down how to change your stress response. We’ll start with the biologically process of acute stress, and how to “practice right emotions” so the next time you’re faced with an important moment— in business, love, or life— you’ll have a winning...
Sep 26, 2024•1 hr 12 min
Mrs. Meepagala rejoins the pod after 100 episodes. (She was on ep100 before we had kids). We speak on power dynamics and imbalance in relationships, mother and father figure differences, the beauty of surrendered woman, and our personal experiences with “trad” gender roles. If you’re a man in a committed relationship that’s not going the way you want, you may want to join my small group program: https://www.ruwando.com/LYF 00:00 - Intro 00:43 - Motherhood and work during baby years 05:27 - Chall...
Sep 19, 2024•1 hr 22 min
A few months ago the Economist wrote an article on the political gender gap— how men are becoming more conservative, and women more liberal. While this seems like a recipe for conflict, in many ways this is a return to human nature. This episode covers the evolutionary roots behind political leanings, the reasons for recent cultural shifts, and some fascinating studies about how your political leading may reveal itself in a brain scan. https://www.ruwando.com/LYF https://www.ruwando.com/archetyp...
Sep 12, 2024•1 hr 37 min
