Blood, Sweat, and Olympic Glory | Caitlin Parker - 914

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this long. Ah, But yeah, like I guess, you know, even from an early age, you know, as a young girl in a male dominated sport, I always wanted to prove that I belonged, and you know, being one of the only girls in the gym, just that was just a constant, uphill battle guys not wanting to spa or work with me, and you know, just having to go, well, you're gonna get in the ring with me, and if you're not gonna punch me back, I'm just gonna punch

You're gonna punch me back eventually. So going in with that kind of mindset, I was just like I just want to prove that, like I can be better than you. You know, it doesn't matter male or female, Like I'm gonna work harder than you. I'm gonna, you know, put everything that I have into this. And I've loved seeing the sport grow in that amount of time. At my gym. Now I think more than half of the fighters actually female,

and yeah, how good is that? And then we have these like development days the girls get together and it's just like I look around, I'm like, this is crazy, what the hell? Like this is so awesome. I was even invited to the AIS to the Australian introduced sport to do, you know, just talk to the females. I had a female camp there, more like the girls that have had maybe under ten or eleven, ten or fifteen fights or something like that. And I went there and

I'm looking around. There's like forty of these girls that have gone to this camp alone, and I'm like, make sure that you get each other's numbers and contacts and work together, even if you just do a little weekend together, travel to each other and just you know, it's so great to be able to uplift each other. But and then again to make the headlines and be you know, make the history of being the first female to meddle for Australia in boxing at the Olympics was insane. That's

that's a massive goal of mine. But also to see the impact that it has had on others and to see that in the in the headlines going you know, boxer female and so many people got around me. It's just, I don't know, it's incredible.

like a brother to me. He won that first medal back after thirty three years we hadn't won a medal, so he won that in in Tokyo, and to be there to cheer him on after things didn't go my way, it was just amazing to be able to just soak in that and just made history, Like how good is that?

And then you know, it made me work even harder, pushed, pushed and put everything I had into this and and myself and one of the other boys again like a little brother to me that you know, we've we've traveled and trained together for years and years and we both of us together won a medal and to be able to celebrate that again, it was just amazing and it was me I got to do it.

not getting that goal straight away. Is this big goal I said of mine from an early age, to go through the pits and falls of it, to keep pushing through this long seventeen years I've been boxing, So I started when I was eleven years old, and now a lot of people have just been started following me, you know lately, you know, coming into coming into Paris, and it might just seem like, oh, wow, you know you did amazing whatever, But I'm like that, can you understand

how long how much work it actually took me? But thank you, I really appreciate it, and then it was like straight away as soon as I got home, when's the next one? What are you doing now? I'm like, give me a little, give me a breath this, I want to take this moment. And I never I've never taken a taken an achievement in I don't think I've

just kind of moved on to the next one. This one, I've really given myself the chance to just reflect on the whole journey and just take it in like this is I did it.

And then as soon as I could, I got a black belt and that's what I was competing and things like that, and you know, I love that obviously. That was my first kind of setting goals at a young age, when I got that I don't want to walk to school by was no's just taking me in the car now independence He realized it's not that great, but U. And then we got to black belt and actually my first time in the ring, in the ring, what do you call on the mat in taekwondo, it's been a

little while for me. I was actually because I I've always been big for my age. I grew, I grew from an early age, and I always looked older than I was. So I was nine years old getting on the on the mat, so weird to say, not in the ring, but on the mat with fifteen year olds and stuff like that. And then in boxing I wanted to start that. It was just the next challenge. I couldn't go to the next dan of the on the on your belt until it was a couple of years I had to wait, and I was like, I'm ready

for for a new challenge. It was very, very different kind of environment I'd say, taekwondo and boxing. Well, even the gyms I was at. So this gym for taekwondo, it was very you know, strict, you couldn't talk to anyone else. You had to you know, do all the things, you bow with the right times and uh. And then I went to the boxing gym and it's just funny. The first time I walked into the gym. My coach's

name is Fox. He looks like a big Viking, muscled up, tattooed head to toe and just we were like a better word like bow, you know. I was just like, yeah, you know, come on, and I was like, hey, this is different already. Wow, let's go. And he partnered me up with this boy to work with it for the first day and he was like, you know, you're be

working with this guy. He's the Australian champion. And I was like, oh my god, whoa, that's so cool, Like I had to work with the Aussie champion, Like that's what I want to be so that was really impactful to start with. And yeah, I guess it just it just kept me going. I loved that environment and I was always very very shy, so you know, I was very excited, but I'd still hide behind mum and dad before i'd walk into the gym. But basically that's how it started boxing.

is not sporty in the slightest and not coordinated. She's always I've tried to take her on the pads before my mom just left right like. But so yeah, yeah, my parents just saw the value in sport and giving me some confidence. I needed that a lot, and you know, discipline and resilience, and through that, I was able to discover my own strength that came with challenging my limits as well.

to be in the front. I wanted to sit down like the other girls, but I was standing at the back. It's the small things. But yeah, I why do I lose track of what I'm talking about.

kind of work towards. So getting in the ring was a big thing for me. And so the first time I got in the ring. It wasn't an official fight, it was called an exhibition. But to get someone in the ring with me, I had to get in the ring with a twenty five year old at thirteen years old, and I loved it. It was such a great experience. Everyone was like, oh, you definitely won that. We were both got our hands raised at the end. But I took that. I was like, yeah, but that was yeah.

That was early on, and then I was able to get a couple of like I think my first actual official fight was a state title fighting yeah, this other girl. Yeah, I was I had to kind of have the big fights early on. I went to nationals. It was my maybe my fifth or sixth five, and I ended up stopping the girl in forty five seconds, just because I was just so eager. And that's my first style. My

taught me Foxy. He just taught me to be tough and I would just come forward and swing and yeah, I guess they didn't know what to do with me, and yeah, they ended up giving me the fight in forty five seconds. I was like, well that's and so from there, I was selected to go to the World Championships in Turkey, and I was just about to turn fifteen. I'm going to Turkey. I don't even think i'd heard of the country before, and I could just travel across

the world. Yeah, insane. It didn't even at the time Mum and Dad, you know, they couldn't They couldn't come, They couldn't afford it. They put all their money and everything they had into just getting me to training. And I was meeting up with a teamide from Perth originally, so I was flying across across the country to meet up with some of the team I think it was Sydney probably, and then fly back over that way to

Europe and to go to Turkey. Very very I think I just loved being able to take that in and travel. I never left Australia and New Zealand, and to be able to go and experience such different culture than what I was used to was just such a learning such a learning experience. And yeah, it took a lot out of it and I got to travel to some amazing countries after that. I think you learn more doing that stuff than anything else.

They're just shy, but so they My dad has worked two jobs seven days a week for my whole life to how to get me to training. Has worked multiple jobs, She did some starts. She was secretary of boxing wa to you know, be able to support and be a part of it, get us you know that, I don't know, get us into the fights basically not have to pay, but that. And she would also sell pies and she would clean houses and she would do whatever it took to be able to raise funds because we didn't come

from much with a low socioeconomic area. You know, a mum and dad probably I think they didn't even finish year eight year ten of highs of school. So yeah, they work extremely hard to be able to give us these opportunities and so yeah, they again fundraise like crazy. They get me to Turkey to the World Championships when I just turned fifteen, and I'm glad they did, you know, because I did win a bronze medal there that that was a big one for me. I was like, you know,

I show them that their sacrifices were worth it. And really, for me, my biggest motivation is obviously myself, but then yeah, like and pushing myself and whatever, but that's that that pushes me. That that's my why as well. I want to show them that, you know, I can I can do and prove to them that, you know, all the work that they put in was worth.

showed a bit of potential. I think he just wanted me to be able to have the opportunities to get the most out of it and to be able to accomplish my dreams. And then I told my parents I want to I want to go to the Olympics, and remember being the local paper like I want to go to the Olympics, And you know, they just wanted to provide that for us and my brother. He he fought a bit, but yeah, he chose another life path and

he wasn't really too interested in it. But for me, Yeah, even to this day, it's so important to have a great support network. I've got to own partner now, who's just incredible and I've been with him for seven years now and he's just been there. Like I can't thank him enough because I can't do this alone. Like you said, it doesn't pay the bills, and there is a struggle.

And to be able to sit there and go away and travel for six months of the year most of the time, and train lot, and for them to stick stick by you, push you to be your best and you know, not not pull you backwards in any way. I'm really grateful.

for the Olympics in the Solomon Islands. And I looked and it was the day before the wedding, but there was no there's a flight out every second day. I wasn't. There was no way I was going to be able to make it. And I was gutted to be able to have to call her up on the phone. I was just blubbering. I didn't think I made sense. I was like, oh no, no, you know, I couldn't make

it like that's you know, because because those people. I have a couple of beautiful, just solid friends that just completely understand that I can't be there for most things. But to say that to her, I was gutted. But she was like, if you don't go, Like, if if you don't go, buddy qualified with the Olympics, I would be mad at you that I.

to move away from family and friends. Yeah, a few years ago now, six maybe six years ago, I had to move away from them because I knew more opportunities were here in Melbourne for me, and that was hard because my family is like my biggest value in life. I love being around them, my mum and dad, my brother, my partner. My partner and I moved over. We're like dating for six months and we moved over. I can't

believe that I don't even know you that well. I don't know, but yeah, can we come over here to so I could get more opportunity to box and for him to work and whatnot, and so just things like that that it missed out a lot of stuff and I hated living away from them for this long. I've just actually just finally convinced them to come and live with me after that Log's It's been about five months or something now, but finally I'm like, God, I'm here. I'm happy. I've got all my loved ones around me.

totably been the biggest challenge for me. Because when I found out that I, you know, women could box in the Olympics, and I'd set myself a goal rio twenty sixteen, I would just be old enough to compete there, and I wanted that with everything I had, and before and after school, I'd before school, we'd go run around the block and do a certain amount of skips and push ups and whatever, go to school, come home. At the time, I was actually playing rugby and I was boxing. I

wasn't playing boxing. I was playing rugby and boxing. But so I'd go from one training to the next because I thought, actually initially that I was going to go to the Olympics for both. I thought rugby and boxing, I can do that. But then you realize how much goes into one sport, and well, and then I got to go to you know, travel the world with boxing. So oh, okay, I guess, I guess that's an easy choice for me. But yeah, I set myself there, go out. I trained so hard. I'd take tuna and boiled eggs

and apples to school. When i'd watch my friends eat the good food, sometimes I'd like, just give me a bite, please, just share a little bit. But I knew. I didn't know what it took, but I knew that I had to kind of do everything I could. I wouldn't go to parties and stuff. Not that I'm a big party or anyway. I wouldn't call that a sacrifice, but the normal teenage staff, I just did past that because it

was just all about training and competition for me. And when it came to that year, the RIO twenty sixteen year, to qualify you had to win the Australian Championships. There was a woman there that had been the Australian chair for years in years, and she was expected to win. I came up from the youth's division and come up and I won, which was incredible. I was so stoked. I had to They challenged me again for the position.

I had to fight again and I won that again, so I was happy I was like, right, I'm going to the qualifiers for boxing, the international qualifiers. You had to be top two in the top two in Asia, in Oceania, or top four in the world. So it was a tough qualification. I went over to Kazakhstan and I drew the hometown girl first and I lost my first fight, and that was it for me. That was it. I just thought, WHOA. After all of that, I was

so heartbroken. I was shattered. I didn't want to go home, and I didn't want to go to mom and dad and face them and be, you know, like, after all they'd done for me and all my friends and family, the leaved in me. I didn't want to let them all down. And obviously I had to go home to go home. Flight there's my money, you stay here on a holiday, non explore kazakhsade though, So I had to

go home. And then you realize that that's exactly where I needed to be, around that support network, and that my loved ones that don't actually value me because of what I do, they value me because of me and they love me for me. So that helped me a lot. And then I kind of had to take the accountability have a bit of self awareness, right, what do I need to do? What can change? What is this taught me? And so I was able to reflect and think, right, you know, what do I need to do. I ended

up actually moving over to the Australian Institute of Sport. Well, I was such a mouthful in Canberra AIS AIS for short from now on, I had to move over. Oh I had to. I moved over there just because there's just a training center. There is nothing really around it at all. There is you get your food, you walk to the training center that you walk to the track. Yeah, that's it. So I loved being in that environment just just head down, didn't have to think about anything else.

And actually that kind of taught me there the importance of strength conditioning. There's an old boxes logic and people always say you don't want to get too big because you're going to be too slow, But no, you can be explosive and its strength and conditioning is so important. So I was able to just learn a lot in that way and being in that high performance environment all

the time. Yeah, and there were a few other things, but that was really important because I had to change that goal right rear it didn't work out for me, what's next Tokyo. Tokyo is four years away. Four years seems like a long time, but there's a lot to do. I didn't realize it was actually to be five years.

But uh anyway, we yeah, I had to had to work hard, and I guess that was a really good thing to do because the Tokyo qualification year come along and I always So we're going to Wuhan, China, and February twenty twenty, that's where we were going. I've never heard of the city before, and then it's all over the news and where we were in. We're in camp and waiting to go two days. Two days before we're heading off. I've got my sanitizer and a mask. I'm like,

it's all good. I just won't like leave the room. I'll just fight and go back to my room. But then the city was shut down, so I was like, we're probably good that I wasn't already there. Oh So anyway back to Australia. Right five weeks time, we've got another day. We're going to Amman, Jordan, and we go back to a training camp in Thailand. We've been training really hard in the heat and humidity over there. We're in our last so the day before we leave, we've

got our last sparring session, the last round. In the last thirty seconds, we're fighting away and the girl comes up from a from a ducks she ducks under and comes up and head butts me in the nose. Oh, And I just went, oh, I might have swept. I don't know to it be no, So I just went, oh, my god, something like that. And I went to my coach in the corner straight away because I knew something was right. He's gone wigg with my nose. He's like, oh, it's broken. I was like, oh my god, I can't

even tell you again, blubbery mess. I just I tried to hold it in and they got out and I was like, what am I good? I was just in tears because I was like, you're kidding me. After this long, I've worked so hard and moved away from my family and friends and done everything I could, trained harder, trained three times a day, and I ate everything whatever. I like to put everything into this, and I'm like, after all of that, I've got a broken nose. I've never

had a broken bone before. I didn't know how it was going to work. How long I had to heal. But we're heading over to to qualify as tomorrow. They've taken me to Bangkok Hospital and when I've got there, they brought the wheelchair out for me. They're wheeling me around. I thought, you know what, I'm just going to accept this. Yeah, I've got a photo taken to me and oh my god, my nose is swollen. I look like, just changes your whole face and yeah. I just thought. They go, oh,

can you fight with a splinter in your nose? And I said, no, you cannot do that. I'm just going to use this, this situation where the masks have just come in to my advantage. I'm going to just hide it. I'm going to just put a mask on and no one's going to be able to see me. And so that's what I did. I went to the qualifiers and didn't tell anyone about it because I'm me and my coach and my and my teammates that were there knew about it, and I was like, I'm just going to

go and find because nothing's going to stop me. I'm cool, mum. At the time, it's like it's okay, there's another qualify. I was like, no, mama. I'm like, there's no I'm fighting care. Lucky I did, because the next qualifiers got canceled anyway, so this was my only chance. And I ended up getting through three fights there with a broken nose and it was okay.

You notice that. You're like, oh, yeah, I got hit. Probably put my hand up or don't do that again. But I'm never in the going into the ring like oh this is you know, I'm worried that I'm gonna get hurt. Never ever, so I just went in normally like I always would. Yeah, my nose is a little bit more swollen, but it had come down by then a couple of days later, thank god. And yeah, when I qualified for the Olympics, that was one of the happiest moments of my life. It was just such a

relief after all of that time. I was just like, I'm done. Out of my hand was raised and I dropped to the floor and I was like and then I realized I've got to get up and like thank my opponent. And I was so stoked. And then after that, I you know, fought until the through to the final

and that was fine. I'm in the last fight. My coach is like, well, you've already qualified now, so if you get punched in the nose and stopping the fight, I've never had a fight stopped every and I was like no, So I fought super I was just whatever. I got in the ring, and I was just like, you know, on the outside, because I was like, if you start this fight, I will be mad. But yeah, it's only because he had that precaution, because we thought we were going to a fight for the Olympics in

a couple of months. And it turns out we get home and they think, hey, you know, the Olympics are got to be canceled, and there was all this talk and I was just gutted. I didn't I didn't know how to. I didn't want to get out of bed in the morning. So like, what's the point that I've just qualified and now they're going to take that away from me? Blah blah blah, feeling sorry for myself.

was kind of stuck at home. I just moved to Melbourne.

I had no equipment at home, and for me, I just I love to eat and that's what I was just probably wasn't watching the scale enough realized Okay, if yes, I talk about weight, because this is obviously weight based sport. I fight at seventy five kilos. I checked the scales in February. I was eighty nine kilos. Oh shit, I was fighting in July at seventy five. And I know it sounds super irresponsibly, was I was just my mind was just I don't know, I just didn't see it

in myself. I thought I'm not going to step on the scales or sorted out. And then I didn't realize I've never been that heavy before. That was a big shock.

not hardly anything. And I struggle cutting the weight because my body's just holding onto everything that I put into it because it's in survival mode. And then I'd finally cut the weight after just sweating it all off and wear a plastic bag so a sweatsuit basically every single day for training and then not hydrate myself.

then fight a state titled fight? Now, like how do you perform at your optimal when you get no food in your body and you're dehydrating yourself?

there's more knowledge around it, because yeah, it was. It was ridiculous. So when I would finally cut the weight after not eating hardly anything, I would binge. I would binge hard, and I'd put it all on like easily. And so it was this constant yo yo for me

over the years. After that experience where I went up almost fifteen kilos over my division, I started really taking it seriously and thinking, right, let's you know, work with a dietician to start coming up with a bit more of a plan and so, you know, and fighting more often through the year. Kept that. Basically, I wanted to say about three four kilos over max, because then I knew ways that I could manipulate what I was eating,

not eating any less. I was still eating the same amount, but I'd go and like have lessons of salt content in the last five days because you hold onto more water. Just things like that. And I feel amazing getting into the ring because I wasn't dehydrating myself and I wasn't taking away food and important things for energy. It's just, yeah,

it's crazy there people even a sauna. I won't use a sauna now before the night before I fight or anything, because I've seen studies that actually it does affect your performance the next day. So I really will just make sure I eat the right things, eat well throughout my time so that I'm doing it responsibly. And I feel amazing And it really made the difference. That was one of the major changes that I had Tokyo going into Paris, and I feel like it made a massive difference. And

now I'm in a healthy mindset. I guess like I haven't weighed myself post Olympics. I haven't got my next fight date whatever at the moment, and I haven't I haven't needed to check the scales, and I'm learning to you know, eat well, fuel myself, fuel carbs before a training session, protein posts to make sure that you're recovering your muscles and things like that. So just just learning about the different foods that you can eat and just making the right choices.

So luckily the last four weeks were able to head off to the US and then to Japan a little bit early to be able to do some training with other people, which is needed in boxing. You need to be able to push yourself against the best, like yes, I could spa. Guys and men they fight differently to women, and often sometimes they might be a bit strong, you might have hesitation in certain ways. So I wanted to fight well, fight spa people in my division you know

around the world. That's they're going to push you to be your best. And so finally we do do that a couple of weeks before, which wasn't enough, but it was whatever. I mean. Harry Garside, my teammate, he did the same preparation. I guess I probably didn't probably did know exactly the same. He did more responsible with his weight, but he he won a bronze medal with the same preparation. But for me, it just it just wasn't was an

idea and there's no excuses there. It just is what it is, and it helped me be better for Paris. But anyway, get over there. The draw is done and I'm up against this woman from Panama. Hadn't fought her before, watched her stuff, and she's She's just got a bit of a different style. She's Southport, left handed, she's very long, and I had this certain tactics that I'd work with my coach going into the fight. It didn't work at all.

I just nothing was working for me. I didn't fight my best at all getting into that ring, and it was weird. The stadium completely empty. There was a couple of people from each team, like a couple of teammates, and this massive stadium, and these fake applauds happening over the speaker at random intervals, not at the right time. So when there's nothing happening, there's a big cheer, and when there's a big combo or something, it's just.

was it. And so at the end of the fight, the Panamanian's hand was raised, she raised, she won the fight, and I thought in a different way again, I was just I was so upset because I finally made it to the Olympics. I dream of mine come true, and I didn't fight well at all. I knew I was better than like what I what I put out there, and people were watching me at home, and you know, people expected all of this so much of me, and

I just I was just so upset. As soon as I stepped out of the ring, I was like, I've got so much more. I remember seeing to myself like I need to put everything I've got into Paris. Like I straight away started reflecting what else do I need to do? And then you know, I get out into the back and then I remember there's the warm up area where we would just I was just excitedly warmed up. There was these big stairs going up there, but I remember after my fire, I was just looked up at

these stairs, so I can't do it. I was just so upset. I couldn't even walk up the stairs. I was just towel over my head, like what. I don't know, It's just it's just different. I guess they go into the ring with his mindset of like it's life or death, like really put so much on ourselves to just be our best and just for all the all the work up that had come to that. I was like, that's

what I put out there. And I was like, oh, so I fel hard to be able to stay in the village, to be able to cheer on my teammate Harry to win the medal because I said, the stadium's empty boxing, it's all on the judges. There's a guy judges around the outside. If I'm screaming every time he you know, lands a little shot or a big shot

or whatever, purely that will help. So I was trying to I was trying to convince the chef to mission and he was like, all right, just say what because everyone at that time you had to leave within them was at twenty four or forty eight hours you had to be out back on a play into Australia. So I was very grateful I could stay around and watch him and he ends up with in the middle and yeah, to be a part of that was amazing and pushed

me to be better. So this time around, I got home three years now, we've got till Paris, which is obs a much shorter time than usual. But I really had to reflect, really like on what I needed to do to be better. The weight making thing was a big one for me, being responsible with my weight and really just eating the right things. Another big one for me was sleep. I'm a terrible sleeper and just when there's a lot of a lot going on. My mind's

always a million miles an hour. Go to bed, and I if I just say let's just lay there straight away, I wake myself back up thinking about everything. So I had to really get a good sleep routine, make sure I was going to bed at the same night and same night, the same time, and waiting up, you know, same time. Just giving myself a good, good routine around that, really focusing and that, and that helped a big time as well. That's the biggest form of recovery and helps

everything performance, all the rest of it. Uh. And then yeah, I think again. Another thing was be like utilizing the people I have around me. So I kind of just always have this all right, I's all right, I can do it by myself, you know, just you have this. I don't know you just I guess it's hard to reach out for help in different ways. And so I thought, right, well, I've got I've got this dietician that I'm going to keep in contact with. I've got a strength and conditioning

coach that I can start. We can just start communicating more, right, check in every you know, every week or or whatever. Make sure I'm talking to them properly and uh yes, sports psychologists never really use that. Like I just thought, I'm fine. No, we worked massively on mindfulness and practicing gratitude and having a bit of a routine coming into the fight, like what am I very much? I like it right there, and then I get obsessed with it, so like I go into the go to the to

the fights two and a half hours before it. Why because I just want to make sure that I'm not missing anything, people aren't getting stopped or I don't know. I don't want to I don't want to hate rushing and being like, oh my god, I'm gonna get there. I'm gonna fight. Like no, I'll get there two and a half hours early. Go to the back, headphones on, go,

lay down, play some Sudoku or whatever else. It's solitary and yeah, and then I'm very like on a timer, like right, this is the time I'm going to start warming up. This is the you know, like I get and I get really like around my schedules once I have them, but maybe a bit too clean on to them. Once they work, I'm like, bow, I've got to do

the exact same thing. Because of boxing. Well, we're in Olympic boxing, we fight over a multiple day, so we weigh in that morning, and we fight the same day, and then we you know, next day, we fight way in again the next morning. So if one coach wraps my hands, they will do it. They have to do it for the rest of the competition because if I won,

then why would I change it. So I just get too much with it, Like I'll have like a like a nose before I fight, and like I know it was a Gatorader something gatorade in my in my bottle, but then the same coach that did that has to do it again. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, guys, It's just and they're like, it's fine, we understand, we know how you work. I'm like, it's just I need this to be the same.

I not me? When I'm in this fight and I've sparred so well and I've done this with the boys and I'm lit and I've been this person in training, and then all of a sudden, I come into this fight and I'm like, and now I can't control myself.

I'd put more pressure on myself. I'd tie myself up before I even got into the ring, and then I get in there and I just I'd be desperate to try, like you know, and I wasn't fighting like I spied really well and I've done everything I wanted to do, and then I get in the ring and I just just oh, it'd be too much, Like I just get out there and yeah, it wasn't doing everything that I kind of set out to do. So. I think the routine and the little things like that that I do

before my fights helped me. The mindfulness stuff helped me massively, because again, I just I'm not always I'm not an like to be fair, not like always always a confident person. I've gained a lot of confidence through this sport and the journey that I've been on, but I have to, like doubt to always be in my head, like, oh, what if this happens? What like what if I don't fight? Well, what if this? But like I've just got to remind myself. I'm like, why am I thinking this? It's because I

care about it because I want to win. And Okay, like right, just let those thoughts go, right, they're just to try to visualize them just going going away, going down a stream, or if floating off on a cloud. Whatever. Just give myself a moment, right, I sit myself down, Just do a little bit of box breathing a couple even, or just like three deep breaths, bang my chest three times. That's a good one. I'm like hard that kind of

I heard that resets. I don't know some kind of thing, but I just stick to it if that doesn't work. And then I sit there and I go, all right, I'm gonna go notice what's around me? So I go through my senses. What's five things I can see around me? I'm such an unobservant person. I won't. I walk into a room and I'm like, I didn't even notice that person's there whatever, just because I'm just I don't know. I guess I'm just focused on one thing. I'm like, Okay,

what can I see around me? Five things? Four things I can hear, three things I can touch, two things I can smell, one thing I can taste. I go through that after my breath. So I'm like, wow, I'm calm, but I'm focused. I feel good. And before I get into the ring, and in my whole preparation, I do a lot of video analysis. And what I mean by that is I'll go through fights for myself. I'll watch myself fight and look at things I need to do and what, you know, tactics and stuff I was doing

there and what I could have done better. But not only only that. I'd have a list of my potential opponents. I'd have them all down and my division and i'd write, you know, all sorts of things, strengths and weaknesses, whatever tactics that I go into that fight. So when I go into to I've drawn someone for my fight. So right, I'm fighting this woman here from this country. Right, this is what I need to work on, and I'll narrow it down to three things, no more than three because

then I'm two. There's too much going on. Three things that I need to focus on for this fight, and it could be for myself for them. You know, what are three tactics I'm going to go in with And I'll narrow it down from like a sentence to like one word. It'll be like body if I need to like focus on more body shots. So then you know whatever, I have these three words, and I've done my mindfulness, I've done my breathing. Right, what's those three things? Body?

I don't know. I can't think of anything at the moment. Very very good. But yeah, so and then I have those three things. That's all I need to do. I know what I need to do, and I can't work on you. You know what what gave me strength? I'd come up with. That's actually that's actually what I haven't talked about.

So I come from my My mum is Maori, so we come from obviously mighty heritage and come from warriors, and I kind of wanted to come up with a word that brought that in, that warrior mentality, that would also, you know, give me strength and build me up because I want to go in I'll go into the ring with all the confidence. I want to build myself up.

And there's one word that I'd used that I'd just be like right, just you know, like I'd say it out loud and like that that would build me up and then I'd be ready, I'm focused, I'm not no, my heart's not grazing a million miles an hour and all the rest of it. So, yeah, that makes sense. I'll go guy, yeah, for a while, don't I But you know, you get there eventually.

I built myself but well, and I practiced that a lot through the journey. I think what for me, I kind of realized that. I was like, oh, wow, I'm getting better. So We're to the twenty twenty three World Championships and at that tournament, I'm I've won my first five whatever, I won my fights before I'm going into the To get into the medal rounds, to get into the semifinals, I need to beat Panama, the same girl that I lost to at the Olympics. And I thought, right,

this isn't a test, you know, Rasis. And it's funny because I actually got the opportunity to spa her. We just got to We got to the so we got to New Delhi, that's where the World Championships were. We got there a few days early and set up a little spa with her. So, okay, we go. So so we're in the gym and I'm working on a few things. But I was just what I was doing is I was trying a few different things, but I'll do them once. But she got the better of my spa. She she

would have won. If it was a fight, she would have won it. I was like, okay, but but I but I noticed things. I was like, right, that worked, that didn't. That worked, I didn't. So then then I drew her. I didn't know it was going to actually fight her at the World's Okay. Well, luckily we got that spiring session in that was perfect and I it was a close fight, but I but I got the win and my hand was raised and I jumped like five feet in the air.

But but to get her coach and the Indian Performer high performance director apologizing to me, I was like, well, oh, anyway, anyway, lost the split decision, almost world champion there, but I got a silver and I just thought this, this shows that I've come so far. But I also put a bit more pressure on me, right because they were like, whoa, You're winning medals at the Olympic division the year before the Olympics, like you gotta win, you gotta win a

medal now, So there's more pressure on me. But I think all that I've learned it helped me get through. I'm just practiced with my gratitude. Was what am I grateful for today? Instead of just always focusing on, Oh, you know, I've got to win, I've got to do this, I got to do that. No, No, what am I grateful for today? Sit there, Sit back and think all right again? Look around like what's around me? Like try and notice and enjoy those little moments as well. So

that helped a lot. But coming into Paris, I was I was so ready, so ready. I put in everything, I had, everything I know, I didn't leave any stone unturned or anything like that. Honestly, were in a training camp before that in Germany, and in this training camp, I'm like, let's just get there already. I'm so so over training I just I was so ready to get into that ring. And we head to Paris and all was good. I'm excited with the drawer. They do the draw.

For some reason, I get really nervous around the draw. It's just like faked, Oh am I going to fight. I've studied all of these I've studied the crap out of all of these girls that I could possibly fight, and I had done thousands of sparring rounds and I've fought many times. I've had I think eighty nine or no ninety five international fights, so something like that. Anyway, I fought a lot of these girls and out of the list, there was only two that I'd never worked

with the pool, I hadn't sparred or fought. And the drawer came out and I've got them both. The first two rounds, I was like that extra, just that unknown. I was like, okay, that makes me very nervous. It's okay, like I've done everything I can for this. Uh So I've got a Mexican first up, and she was shorter than me, which is odd because in my division I'm actually one of the shorter one seventy five killers. They're all quite tall and she's short of than me. I'm like, okay,

I've got the reach here, let's go. And but I knew she was tough. I knew she would just keep coming forward. I've watched her fight before and a few people had actually mentioned to me, like, don't underestimate her. She's she's tough and then strong, and like she just she's relentless. She won't let you off the hook. And well, right, that's fine. I went into that fight like it was the final. Every fight with for me, it was the final. I wanted to I needed to win that to get

past anything else. So it was the final. And well, straight up, I knew she she did what I thought she would. She came at me, and I used my feet, got around the ring and tried to you know, punch and move. And then there was a point where like she kind of like at me and I threw this right hook and I like moved out to the side at the same time. So it was a quick like to make her fall into into the ropes. And it worked, and I was like, brilliant, We'll do that again, you know, fight, fight,

and do it again. The right hook off fell into the ropes again. I was like, we're just gonna keep doing this is perfect and I really enjoyed that. I had a great fight, won every round. I got my hand raised there, and yes, it wasn't a repeat of Togyo that was in my head before. I'm like, don't repeack. You know, what if you lose again, what if you miss that? I know it's not in my control. I just thought, I'm gonna go out there and do the

best that I can. I know I can do it, and yeah, got won the fire and I was just absolutely stoked. Then I thought, right, I'm going to enjoy this moment for the next couple of hours and then I'm gonna reset because it was I had a few days in between the Olympics. They spread it out. It's Ober two week period and I had to win four fights to get the gold. So that's fine, I've got I've got a couple of days that I'm going to just not back in, but I'm going to go see

my part. I know who ended up coming over and just you know, enjoy this little moment. Next, I had to reset because I was actually drawn against the Moroccan and she is the super heavyweight world champion. She's been that for years. I don't even know when she lost her last fight. She never loses. She's massive, and I thought, all right, okay, so we're gonna obviously don't want to stand there and get hit. I've got to be able to move out of the way because she's strong and

she would throw all her weight into these punches. So when she when she gets someone, it shows, and that can sway the judges like that, especially when you get a hit early on on you and I just say, oh, well, you know they're probably going to be watching her for the rest of the fight, so you're going to make a good impression early on. So yeah, getting into that fight, I was actually going to go in a certain way.

I was going to go in where I was just going inside and because she was so big and just working as hard as I could for the but you know, in the inside and staying in there. And my tactics changed. Actually, just before we went out, I saw the girl that she beat to get in. She was fighting her at long range and she was about the same height as me. And I fight very well long I fight, I fight

well both. But you know, I was like, right, I can use my foot feet try and find the opportunities here, and then when I see those opportunities, get in the get in the inside, mix it up. But I don't know. I'm home, and I getting too technical. I'm trying to like, I love it.

my favorite fight ever. I enjoyed that so much. I just and watching the footage back is so funny because I might here like you know, looking up right up at her like I just look so but I just it just all came together and I got my hand raised again there and I was like, holy shit, I have just secured myself a medal for Australia created history.

What the hell like this. It was just incredible. So I got out of the rings straight away and they actually through to the media bit and I just like, the guy has gone to interview me and I've grabbed his mic off him and I didn't realize they did it. I was just so excited. There's so much adrenaline and god, I just started talking my absolutely heart out and I didn't realize that he's asking me questions. You can't hear

him because I'm not sharing the mic. I've just got it here and I'm just ready to go and I'm like, yeah, I'm going to war and next fight. I'm everything into it, like let's go. And just a few people watch that bag. That's what probably I think more people in Australia probably saw that interview than actually the fights. I don't know. That's what I got coming to the more because I just thought it was the funniest thing. A few people gave me like a little karaoke mic as well. Afterwards.

They're like, you know, this is your own one, you can have this. I love this.

all out for yourself in the ring. You can't wait a whole round, waste a whole round for your coach to tell you what don't do that, what are you doing because that's one whole round out of three rounds and the judges are probably watching that your opponent now, So you've really got to figure it out for yourself. Yeah, it's actually insane. Sometimes I'm like, oh, this is such

a yeah, such a crazy sport. But I mean they're each sport has their own massive challenges, and I mean, yeah, that's just boxing.

that's not how we do it. And it's like, no, he just needs to be able to trust me with one skill set first, and then once he knows that I've nailed and I have the capacity for more, he gives it to me. And I was just like, fucking hell, it's been a decade in this sport and I'm still learning brand new things.

I'm more explosive. I'm usually a lot faster and I can I can make that work, and you just you're do you make it work? But not only that as well. Yeah, I'm on the sport now. But it doesn't matter what age you started. I started young. It was great for me, but there's some people in my team that have started in their twenties on even I think started yeah, like late twenties even thirties that went to the Olympics with us. So it's it's yeah, you're never You're never too old

to start anything. Whatever your goal or challenge is, You're never too old to start. Just get out there and have a go.

It was you know, Serena and Williams never got punched in the face there, so you know, I just feel like that that's pretty good. So Rolling Gaross, there's massive crowd. I fighting this this woman from China. She's actually beaten me a couple of times in the past. She's one of the smartest fighters I've ever come across it. She adapts really well in the ring, which is it was challenging because so I came out in the first round,

I had all the right tactics. I won the fight on all judges school sorr, I won the round on all judges schoorecards. She came out the second ring, the second ring, Oh my god, see what am I doing now? The second round. She came out the second round, and she knew to smuggle me a bit so to because I was fighting well long, I was picking her atha, I was doing all the things. She was like, okay, don't let her do that again. I'm gonna hold her

and try it, you know. So she'd try to kind of like, yeah, not allow me to fight my fight, and it got messy, which worked well for her. So I started, like you know, tangling up more and grabbing my hand, and it takes a lot of effort to try and get out of those clinches and try and fight my way out of it. And I thought I thought I did. Okay, I thought I did all right. I didn't know how the round went until I went back to my coach in the corner. So the coaches

they see the scores. Actually between each round, they come up with the scores, and it came up. My coach goes, you're even going into the last round, So meeting she'd won that round on all George Judges school cards. And my heart sank a little bit because I thought I thought I would have got a couple of them. But okay, let's just put everything I possibly have into this, like I'm just leaving. I'm gonna leave it all in the ring,

and I did. I just went out there. I had a bit of a blood nose as well, just you know, it happened. Sometimes my nose does bleed a little bit, but whatever, So I'm gone out there and I put it all that. I had nothing left in the tank at all, fought my heart out. At the end of the fight, her hand got raised and you know what, like this is, this is, this moment is crazy to me. I haven't had a sad moment. I didn't have it. I wasn't sad. I wasn't I wasn't upset. I knew

I put it all out there. She got a hand raised, I thanked her. It was a it was an awesome fight, and I just took that moment. I looked around and I stood in the ring for it maybe another love thirty seconds or whatever. I've stood there and I looked around at this in this stadium. Oh my god, like I'm here, I'm on the podium. I don't I don't go to the final, but I'm on the podium. I've put my all into this whole journey. I'm so so

proud of myself. And I just honestly, like haven't been upset into this day, like which is weird because you know, after after I lost, usually you know, gut it and whatever. But I just I was proud and I still am of everything I put into that journey, everything I left in the ring. And to be honest, actually I haven't even watched that fight back yet because it's such a positive thing for me at the moment and we're all our biggest critics. I know when I watch it back,

I'll be like, oh, why did I do that? Why did I do this? But no, I'm not ready for that yet. I just feel like once I'm ready, when I have another fight set or whatever else, I'll watch it back. Obviously you need to do that to improve and to learn from those mistakes or whatever else, or learn what to show what I did good. But it's

positive for me and I'm happy. And so I told myself, right, I'm going to just take all these opportunities that I get and say yes to everything I can and just why not do this, do that, like try new things. This is my moment to something a little bit different. So also I was, I was. I was burnt out. Afterwards, I knew I'd left everything in that training camp, everything in that ring. I was burnt out, and I knew

I was not. I told my coach, You're not going to see me for a couple of months in the gym, Like no, I'm gonna need a bit of a breakup of this. So just yeah, it's been it's consumed me for a while now. It's been my every single thought. So and then like when I get really obsessive about something, I've really put my all and set my whole self and everything I do into it, Like even to the fact that I wouldn't wear like gray clothes or silver

jeweler or anything, because that would be that would symbolize silk. Second, and I wanted to be gold. I wanted to be first gold medal of my phone screen. Save. This is all for the past like four or five years that

I'd had this on. So I just thought, I'm want to change my screensave it at my dog now, like it's time to just be a normal person and just say, yesterday's awesome opportunities to go and talk to schools and show my medal and really share that journey, because an Olympic medal, like although you know people you think like, oh,

you just put in it a safe like look after it. No, my motto or my thing that I've been trying to do is really just share it with as many people as I can, kids at schools or we just want to have a little touch, and I'll make sure everyone can have a little hold. And because I imagine that like as a kid, if I got to hold Olympic medal that would have made such an impact on me. So even if it doesn't have give them an Olympic goal or whatever, just try your best. I always talk

to them. I share a lot of lessons that I've learned along the way. But it can just even have a goal at a sport or whatever, be active, whatever it encourages. It'll be something positive. So that I've even gone to you know, to to businesses and stuff like that, and I've had people come up to me afterwards and be like, I haven't like I did you know BJJ. I think this woman said, I haven't done it for eight years, but I'm going to get back to the gym. Or the little girl said to me the other day.

It's just like I want to be like you and I oh my heart, like that is beautiful. Like if I can do one you know, small thing for them, like it'll just make my day and it will make everything worth it.

And I was just went away on a camp for the USY team again, so you know, doing things like that, I'm like, Okay, I'm finding the enjoyment in doing that and I love being active and just just and also just again just getting back myself do a bit of

a routine. But again, the thing I want to kind of focus on is just trying to better myself a little bit in it could be any way, could be doing a little course, it could be I don't know, even just spending more time with my family at Like just doing things to better myself and to continuously grow I think is really important. But yeah, don't have a fight date yet, probably won't fight for the for the rest of the year, to be honest, Like I'm just not ready to kind of put myself back into all

that I know is needed. But i still want to go to LA Like that's a big goal, Like and I'm not putting, Like I want the goal, right, but I'm not gonna put it. It's a b or end or if I don't get that, I'm not worth anything. No, because I know I've accomplished so much in this sport, and like it's not all about accomplishments. It's it's about it's about the journey again. I just it's such cliche things, but it is, like I just I just want to make sure I'm enjoying every part of it, every part.

I don't love running and stuff, but I do I enjoyed the after I've got.

I mean, I love the support, but just get yourself into getting the listeners, get active, just get out there and and then do something if you if you want to try a little boxing for fitness class, if you're not you're not into the fighting, do that, like just just you know, do it for yourselves as well. But if you ever want to, you know, come to a boxing session down in Mornington, Finincila Boxing.