Papa, Can You Hear Me: Florida Man Kidnaps Self

birth to up to nine offspring a day. I'm just looking. They reproduce a sexually. Okay, So it wasn't like dad got mom and pregnant part in a genesis. Well, it did remind me of my favorite Yahoo answers of all time. The question was can your baby get pregnant if you have sex while pregnant? And then that was the title, and then the question the question underneath says like, if you are pregnant with a baby, girl and you have sex while you are pregnant, can the sperm go up

in there and impregnate the baby in there? And then someone calling themselves Hennessy the best answer chosen by voters and said the baby can get pregnant only if it's female. If you suspect that your baby is pregnant, try not to have sex again. You run the risk of getting your baby's baby pregnant, and that can lead to complications like an infinite loop. So that's kind of what goes on with its like a Russian Yeah, so that was all ridiculous. Oh that is uncut ridiculous and Hennessy, thank

you for clarifying. Thank you. That's a damn good one. Um, if you have a moment, I got a wild one for you. Yes, please, Are you got a second? I can make time nice for you. I can. Then I'm just gonna ask you. Imagine that you're twenty years old, okay. Now you live in Florida, okay, and you decide it would be a good idea for you to fake your own kidnapping and extort two million dollars in ransom from a Colombian cartel connected gangster. Right, and this man is

also your father. Oh wow, this is ridiculous. Crime A podcast about absurd and outrageous capers, heists and cons. It's always murder free and Elizabeth ridiculous. Okay, I promised you story Florida. You made that promise three. This is one year before the year that or Well made famous, right right? Okay, remembright here. So to put you back in time, I want you to just go over some major cultural touch zones of nineteen eight three. You're ready, ready, Okay, way

back machine starting now? Okay, RayBan sunglasses, Michael Jackson Thriller dominates the charts. The McDonald's chicken McNugget debuts, Jane Fondes Jazzer Size is selling bookoo vhs and Beta Max tapes on Yeah Becausette tapes and their return of the Jedi. It's dominating at the box office right nineteen Can you feel the surging through you? I have straight up there? And when someone says nineteen three, does anything jump to mind?

Anything leap to mind? Anything that you just have, like oh when I think three, boom um, I don't know. It all sort of blurs together for me. That it's a hard one to separate out, to be quite honest, because it's not an election year, not an Olympic, hadn't hit Olympic fever happening around the culture. I feel like I was listening to a lot of Duran Duran. Okay, that could see that. Yeah, they I think the Smiths had their first album three right. Yeah, so there's some

cultural touchdowns that were coming up for you personally. I mean that, yeah, but you were just a young six still eyeing the culture, going what's going to come next? Exactly now, Elizabeth, this also was the birth ye or some of your favorite people. I looked it up. I checked to see the list. I pulled out a couple of my favorites. You know, we're going to skip past

the Azas and sories of the world. Who was born in three but we're also going to stick to the summer babies because that's when this story takes place, all right. So June maclemore was brought into the world as Baby Macklemore. I know, not one of your favorites, the rapper Macilmore. Yeah, you feel like a scooter video. I'm doing this is good now. A month later after Baby Mackamore entered the world,

funny hammer guy Chris hams Work was born. Yeah, and one of your favorite time He's funny, he's got a hammer. So there was let's see. Also at the end of the summer, Donald Glover was born, who you actually do like much like Funny Hammer Guy's say, Malcolmore. Now September was Donald Glover's birthday. Just putting that out there because you wanted to send a birthday card. Coming up fast now, two weeks before Donald Glover inches the world. That's where

our story takes place. Okay, you into this. Okay, Florida late summer, Yeah, hot, humid, sticky, eats everything you don't want to be Now. It's the kind of place where it feels like it may start raining anytime soon, or it's just gotten done rainy. There was an old joke I used to hear when I was a kid about Florida, which is like, if you don't like the weather in Florida, just stick around an hour, it'll change. Now this is what you're experiencing as you are in South Florida, the

Miami Dade area. And the star of our tale that I would like to tell you about today is a man named David Hampton Butler Senior. David Hampton Butler Senior will be a test latter, so please write that time writing it right now, the four years before our story begins. David Hampton Butler Senior. He is a you know drug smuggler and he's hanging out gets busted in Alabama and that becomes like who he is. But when we meet him in nine, he's a vice president of a small

charter airline called trans Air. And this is, you know, a step up for an x con. You don't expect him to be the VP of a private airline, right right. He's living well, not like you know, high on the hog. But the guy has a three thousand dollar home in three which is you know, that's sizeable and expensive, and he's doing well in life. Has also got a garage full of several luxury cars, and he likes to keep

a low profile. Does he have an embroidered pillow in his home that says living well is the best revenge? Nobody needs one? He does with like the gold tassels and stuff. So this guy, David Hampton Butler Senior, who appears to have gone legit, he is doing what psychiatries like to call a lie. He is living a lie. He has not gone leg yet. Clinical, Yes, keep up with me. I'll try not to use too much of the Yeah, this one. He's also what criminologists would be

referred to as an active drug smuggler. Yeah, so he's also has one other secret. He is a high level informant for the FBI. Oh yeah, he's hit. He's pouncing around. Now. His family doesn't know this. In particular, his twenty year old son doesn't know this. Dave Hampton Butler Jr. Twenty year old son. Now, this one little secret will go on to shape both of their futures because I believe if his son did know that his father was a high level FBI informant, he probably wouldn't think it was

a good idea to fake his own kidnapping. Otherwise, it's a great ideas a solid plan. But I'm saying is if your dad has buddies in the FBI, they've got the tools to catch you real quick. Now, at the time of this kidnapping, his best friend is this Judge's son, who's this is narrative. Well, he's also has a girlfriend. She's an eighteen year old who attends at a community college. She's also an exercise teacher. Her name is Carmen Karin.

And uh yeah, so he's got the narrative. Well, Judge's best friend, the jazzercise teacher as his girlfriend, and together these three amateur kidnappers come up with a plan to con and extort his father, the cocaine cartel gangster. There's three amateurs idea. It's a simple plan to keep it down to brass. Tax was like, well, we're not gonna have a lot of a dormant and embellishments. We're just gonna do straight ransom notes. Right. So, David Butler Jr.

This is their plan. He'll go missing on a Friday, have a nice long weekend, hang out with his girlfriend, you know, just normally do what they would do. They they're gonna go enjoy a Florida weekend together while his friend Joe Hickey, he helps work out the threatening parts for his father, right, because it's important that his father be terrified that he's gone. It can't just be that they go off on a lark. So they have this whole plan. On Friday, he'll go missing and then hide

up for the weekend, laylo with her girlfriend. On Monday, they'll arrange for his return once they've properly scared his father throughout the weekend. Okay, Okay. Now, his girlfriend Carmen, she comes up with the plan. She'll type up ransom notes at the community college. They have typewriters there. That way they won't be traced back to her, won't be handwritten. Kind of smart right now, Joe Hickey, he helps a word these so they're maximally threatening. He actually has a

little history with threatening people. He faced a charge where he tried to get a woman to pay five hundred dollars to get a dog back or something. And so yeah, he's like a whole I said, never do well, He's like, I got this one. Here's what we gotta do. Put in terrifying language. So he believes that it's the cocaine smugglers who grabbed you. So he's working on making this

terrifying ransom notes. Right, So, the first typewritten ransom note arrives at the Butler home on Friday, Right one's gone missing. The ransom note reads, we have finally taken revenge against you, Mr Butler. We are now holding your son David Jr. Al Right, simple, straightforward, right to the point, right, And the note also includes the demand they will insist on two million dollars in small bills if you ever want to see your son ever again. It's this one strapper money.

They're like, yeah, I want five and one and they got to be crinkly and correctly. And I can't smell sweat. I don't want it now. David Butler Sr. His son's grabbed. He knows he deals with bad men all the time from a living He immediately begins to panic. His worst fears have been realized. His criminal business dealings have now not only put his life at risk, but put his family's life at risk. Right, So on Friday, he doesn't know what to do. He does he want to tell

his wife? Does he what can? He can't call the cops. He doesn't know what to do, right, So he's like panicking, racking his mind, spends the whole night in fear. Saturday, new ransom note or lives and he's like, okay, so he checks the ransom note and this one, this one is more threatening. Thank you, Joe Hicky. So but no, you must know our threat is real. David is safe. Your time is running out. We will not stand for any setups or police involvement if we are informed. Otherwise

your son will be killed without hesitation. Right, So it's ramping up. Good job, Joe Hicky. Now the father David Butler Sr. He believes Rampson notes are or could be legit. He's not exactly certain because they don't quite fit the pattern he would expect. But it's his son. I would think at this point they'd be like sending a pinky or something that exactly, you know, if he's dealing with real Colombian Cartel's like, we got to ramp this up, and it's not. It's hard to find a spare pinky

to send. So like if I were them, if they went upstairs to the faculty lounge at this community college and they got me to come down and help them type it up, it's true freedom. I feel. Here's what we do. You guys go get a piece of bologney and we'll say we cut off some of his rump meat and this is it slice. Yeah, it would be really good on rye. Yeah exactly. I like this. You could have been good. See I don't think not, and

we just haven't found out about it yet. The look on my face right now, pure shock, Elizabeth, Master, criminal that you are. What would you do next? You've got the father terrified. Okay, so we're not sending rump meat, so flip it. What do you do as the father? As the father, how about that. I call some people I know and feel like you're good at this. These amateur criminals, they should have consulted with someone like you,

because that's exactly what his father did. There. He goes right to his handlers at the FBI and he's like, Okay, my son has been grabbed. And the FBI is like, you're in luck. That's what we do. We don't care. So they're like, we promise you will find your son or we will try really hard. So FBI's free. He spring into action. Right, they promised to find the kidnappers. Sunday, nothing has occurred yet a new ransom note arrives at

the Butler home. Right. This note now has instructions for what he's supposed to do to get his son back. The note tells him to follow instructions to a sidewalk cafe in Coconut Grove, Florida. So he does. He gets in his car, takes into one of his luxury cars, drives down to Coconut grow He finds his sidewalk cafe. He walks in. He follows a ransom notes instructions and it says to check behind a poster on the wall.

He goes up, he finds his poster on the wall, and there behind the poster is what a second note. It's fun hanging out down. It's just like flat stamps. So this second note, it warn't quote. Every precaution has been taken to prevent any of your tricks. So these people apparently know him, right, these people is his son? His son knows his father, well, he knows his father's up to all his tricks. At least he thinks he

knows his father. Well, that's the key. Now, as this weekend drags on, David Hampton Butler Sr. Begins to suspect it may not be a rival Colombian cartel that kidnapped his son. It doesn't feel like their style. They wouldn't send all these cheeky messages, is your point. They would send a finger, They would do and something. Can you imagine they had to go to this cafe and like slip the paper, do they know, like one of the waiters like don't tell anybody for a scavenger and then

like slip it behind in Florida State. It's fun. It's a fat thing. So yeah, that's not cartel behavior. Yeah, the whole like sidewalk cafe. I mean, right there, I'm like, you are not a member of a cocaine cartel. They're like, Okay, go to this frozen yogurt the bottom of the eminem sprinkle. Make sure it asked for the fun fl you find your son's pinky. Well, it turns out that his instincts are mostly right, as we will soon find out after

the short break. Will be right back with more The Strange Tale of David Hampton Butler Jr. Versus David Hampton Butler Sr. So, Elizabeth, where were we? We were talking some Dave versus Dave action. We got the battle and Dave Dave Senior, Dave Junior producer, Dave yea, do you have any comments on this? Houses Dave on Dave action? For you, I mean, the thing is, you can't really bet for or against either Dave. I mean comes out you just you just got. It's written for Dave. I

always root for Dave. Dave always wins. Dave's right now. David Hampton Butler Jr. Missing David Hampton Butler Senior panicked but has the FBA on his side. So he's feeling a little bit of a good position and he's kind of certain this is a little hinky and that maybe his son is not really in danger. That's where we're at. So being an FBI informant, he's feeling, you know, these tricks don't quite play, and he's uh, you know, curious.

But at the same time, it's his son. He's got to still care about what's going to happen to his son. So if he's wrong, even if ten percent chance that it could be actual cartel, he's got to play that tempercent chance, right. But his FBI context they also have their doubts, so it's getting lower, more like a five percent chance. Right By Monday, the FBI agents come to the conclusion that there are no true kidnappers involved in this.

They've looked over all the materials, they've read it. They're like, these are amateurs. I don't know what's going on here. Do you have any personal contexts? Do you owe anybody money who would be trying to do this to you? Dave Hampton Butler, seeing your rax's mind, he cannot think of anybody he owes money to anybody personally who would be doing this to him. It's got to be one of his criminal contexts. If somebody was doing this to you. Would you have a long list of people you would

guess at the intern um, I don't really. I would not have a long right. It's difficult to come up with a list of enemies for the average person. Now, if you're an FBI informant, you have a little bit longer list, and if you're a drug dealer, double your length. So he's got a list he's kind of creating, like uh, and he's crossing out names. He can't figure it out. Luckily for him, Monday night, he gets a call from the kidnappers, first time they have actually spoken with him.

So now he's like, oh, I guess they are legit. They tell the worried father, if you pay the ransom, your boy will be returned the following day. So he's like, all right, well, I gotta play the five percent chance that these people are He's instructed to bring twenty bags of cash once again, all small bills, totaling two million dollars, and drive out to a remote location for the exchange. David Hampton Butler Senior. He listens to all the instructions, He's like, okay, bet, and he does as he's So

he's got that kind of cash. He's a drug smuggler. So I got he's got the two million sitting around, went out to the deep freezer and the only hard part was making sure it's small bills. He's like, I gotta go down and find he broke, Like he had to go around breaking him at strip clubs. He was going out to clubs and when the girls are walking out, how would you shift? Did you make a couple of foul?

So after he's been done, gathering up all his cash, putting it in like ziplock bags of twenty ziplock bags, all with little cash. He does this. He's instructed. He drives out to this remote location. Now he has to go down to two lane highway from basically Tampa to Miami that runs through the Everglades. And this is like, there's nothing on this highway. It's just the Everglades, just swamp right. So he's like, I don't know where I'm going to possibly meet a person out here. Elizabeth, you've

ever been to the floor Everglades? Now do you know what I'm talking about? It all seen. So imagine a road, the two lanes like a southern highway, a little grass strip on either side, and then as soon as the grass strip ends, it's just swamp swamp immediately cypress trees. Like an alligator could crawl out onto the road. Right, that's where he's driving by himself, with all these two million dollars in cash. So, Elizabeth, I'd like you to close your eyes and picture it. Okay, It's a sweltering

Monday night in Florida. It's the kind of humid night that makes your clothes stick to your skin. You can hear the air vibrating with the heat and the bugs. You're alone, standing on the side of a two lane rural highway hitchhike. It's a very yeah, you know, we got the short shorts on. So far, it's been a long, hot night. A few cars have passed, none have stopped

for you, and the mosquitoes there won't leave you alone. Finally, out past the curtain of cypress trees and the thick swamp rushes, you spy headlights approaching in the dark distance. Maybe this will be the car that stops you. Hope, you say a small prayer. You need to get out of this night. The mosquitoes are pretty much feeding on you, and the sweat is driving you mad. So the car. It slows down. Maybe a small hope is being answered. It's a Mercedes. It pulls to a stop in the

loose gravel right next to you. It starts idle, passenger windows slides down. It's middle aged white man. He's at the wheel. He tarranting, looks at you. His face is really worried. It's kind of actually scary. He says, do you know where the trail Indian Baptist churches? You're like, uh, Now, before the truth can escape your lips, which is no, you do not, a lie leaps from your lips and you say, yes, yes I do. If you give me a ride, I'll show you where it is. I'm going

that way. Now, you're from California. You don't know Florida at all. You're with psychiatrists. Call lying. I am covered in mosquitoes. I'm getting like anaphylactic at this point. Yeah, I'm like whatever, Yeah, I know where everything is. Let me in the car. I'll personally build the church. Let's go. I built the globe. Let me in here. Well, it's like I say, a bump steer is better than no steer at all. So you give him the bumpstaer and send him on the road, but you also hop in

the car with him. So he's like, yeah, get in. You're like, all right, cool. You immediately notice when you get in that there are but at least fifteen bags of cash in the back seat. I'm like, well, just dude, to turn around with bags of cash? Did he just rob a strip clumb Now this car idea maybe wasn't such a good idea for you, but you're in it, and he floors it. And now you're on this rural highway tearing down inn Mercedes and this guy with the loose cash in the back and he's got wild eyes.

You're like, I need to make better choices with my life. Yeah, totally, But hear me out, I'd rather see bags of cash in the back than see like an abduction kit of like duct tape and a hammer and that garbage bags. And he's just you know, that's so I look around. I see the cash like this I can probably handle. Maybe he's a legitimate businessman. Maybe he won't notice if I just put one into my back pocket. I like your thoughts. So this middle aged man, frantic eyes behind

the wheel, he turns to you. After a few miles, he says it's the church this way or back the other way, and you're like, uh, now you got tell well, I'm trying to go straight right it is down the road, apiece. We will just keep going. It's exactly what you say. You lie your sweet face off it. He buys it. And now you're turning to wonder if you get to the church, can you make a run for it because this guy is really making you nervous. Oh yeah I can. And then oh what luck? You spy a sign there?

It is? You claim it's the Trail Indian Independent Baptist Church. Yes, totally right, it's a chance you one. He barely touches the brakes, the car slides into the gravel of the church parking lot. Luckily it's just before midnight, there's nobody in there. He then hops out of the car just as it stops, runs over to a pay phone by the church, and you then see that he doesn't use the payphone. Need to stand there waiting, and you're like, this is really odd. Does he not know the number

to call? Is he nervous to call the person? Is he calling his wife? What's going on here? Right? Then, all of a sudden, the phone rings. You're like, oh, he was waiting for the call. The money in the back seats all starting to put together. You're like, huh. Now you're sitting there alone in the Mercedes with the cash, and you're like, did he leave the keys? He did not leave the keys. So you're having to sit there and you're in this parking lot. Every lade swamps all

around you. As I told you, it looks like an alligator could climb out of the swamp at anytime. You don't really want to get out of the car. You're like, what the do I do? You know what I do? What do you do? I grab a bag of cat every plane starts, I really quietly get out of the car and I tiptoe around the back and they break in the back of the church suctuary, yes, the church in the wild, and then I hide from him. This church, it turns up, belongs to the Mikosuki and Seminole tribes

who live in the area. It's of super rural. This is like there's nobody around there, but they have a little community. Right. So this church, as all churches are most churches are, is open. You're like hoping that maybe, you know, I could spend the night here, right, You're like, huh. But right as you're kicking over all these plants in your head, you see the driver screaming into the phone, go where go where? I'm not going out into the swamp in the middle of night. You have to be

kidding me. You're like, I don't know what's going on here. Silence told the silence again, he listens. Then all of a sudden, more shouting, yes, I have a cash Do you have my son? You're like, oh, snap, you're at a ransom exchange. You don't know what to do. Then you hear the driver shouting to the phone. Well, then you can't keep him and he hangs up like, oh I didn't go well. So he slammed the car door shut, gets back in with you. You call me, turn everything okay,

and he's like, I'm going home. You need a ride. You're like, ah, you look at him, You look at the church. You look at him, You look at the church, like, I'll just I'll stay here. So you get out of the car, you walk over the church. Luckily you're right, the doors are open. You spend the night in the church, and Mercedy pulls away and you're like that was one of the weirdest nights of my life. I've got a great story going forward that, Oh totally. You're gonna have

one hell of a TikTok to tell. All Right, So as you're sitting there in the church, you spend the night, you sleep in a pew, you wake up in the morning, you go outside, the sun is there to greet you. And you walk out and there's a cop car. You're like, what the And it's a look a sucky seminal tribal police officer. It's like out a cruiser and in the back is this kid, a white kid, sweaty face, mosquito bites all over. He looks like he slept in a

swamp because he did. You're like, I bet that's the kid. Yeah, and you are right David Hampton Butler Jr. David Junea. So it turns out you just saw David Hampton Butler Jr. Right at the moment when he gets rescued from his botch self kidnapping. Uh wait, he was actually at this

whole So on Friday he kidnapped himself. Here's okay. What had happened was he spent the weekend driving around town with his jazzer size instructor girl from They like, you know, they're calling Joe Hicky, you got the new ransom note ready, We're ready to go. Type it. They go to community college type it up. They're doing their bit right. Everything's going like a bad Team movie starting, I don't know,

like a pre fame Nicholas Cage. And this bad Team movie comes to its culmination on Monday when they decide, okay, it's time to get paid now. Joe Hicky is looking at about a thirty grand score that's his cut of this, and he's willing to do all this stuff two million and he's only doing thirty grant right. So he picks the church. He's like, I know this roll out of

the way spot. He lines up everything. He drives David Hampton Butler Jr. Out To the church, goes get out, drops him off in the swamp and says, we'll get your father to come out here. When you see him drop off the money, walk out of the swamp and greet him like, Dad, it's me bet. So he makes him hang out in the swamp there for twenty six hours. And remember you saw the dad drive away. The dad was like no, I ain't going into I'm not following

these instructions anymore that five percent. I don't believe you don't really have my son or you are my son. I don't care. I'm out of here. So, after he realizes his dad is not coming to save him, he

has to walk out of the swamp. He walks out of the swamp all like mosquito, bitten and sweaty and and barely surviving all the venomous creatures that live in the swamp, and the first thing he sees is a cop who pulls them over and they go, hey, what are you doing out here because there's nobody out there, and oh, yeah, I got grabbed by these Spanish speaking gentlemen.

The cops are like, now their their native cops, so they don't go for the racist lies, like we don't believe your son, So they keep questioning for three hours. He's like, yeah, he's Spanish speaking gentleman who took me in there? Like okay, well what did they say? And it's like it's like, I don't know Spanish and so I don't speak that, you know, So they don't buy it. They keep after him. Eventually he's like okay, I did it myself. I could have myself. He totally comes clean.

He admits to the cops that he his girlfriend Joe Hikey, they all got together and they were trying to extort his dad, but it didn't happen, so it's fine, no crime. The cops are like, no, that's a crime, So we're going to call the FBI because that's kid. Not think you can have yourself. That's still kidding. So they always

that's boss, which is embarrassing to say the least. Can you imagine if your mom worked with the FBI and she got that call, Like, hey, by the way, So David Hampton Butler Jr. Uh, Well, before we get back to David Hampton Butler Junior having to come correct with his father once he figures this out. When you were a kid, do you ever have to wait for your parents and like they didn't come and like you're sitting yeah,

my grandma your grandma house. Well, she was supposed to pick us up from school, and a lot of times she would get distracted doing stuff and like one time, like sometimes would be like she was just in the supermarket for she loved going to the supermarket and staying for like three hours. She loved going she did. That

was her jam. And then one time we were there and I like to remember it where it was raining, but I don't know if it really was raining, but in my memory it was, yeah, my brother and I were sitting there all rain soaked, and she didn't show up. And in my like, I'm like it was like, what eight o'clock. I was probably you know, like she was

probably like an hour late. I'm like six hours late. Um. And it turned out that she got stuck in a parking lot of a store because there was a car accident blocking the exit, so she was just stuck there and she didn't have a cell probably just went back into the store like something. Do I know that? And this is this is hitting a little close to home, sah.

And also I think you may need to amplify that to like buy a thousand percent because like, imagine if you kidnapped yourself and your dad's like, I don't know, keep them. It's worse than sitting in the the Florida cops, as they told you, they call the FBI, and the FBI sends out agent David Boner to work the case. Agent David Boner because there's how many. They're just going alphabetically. Anderson's busy Boner, Dave Anderson, No, Dave Boner, gut go on.

So doesn't take long for the agents to break the case. David Hampton Butler Junior confesses to it all. He gives up everyone, and then they of course they turn them loose on the justice system and the prosecutors for the federal courts. They go after him, They confront him, He agrees to a pleadio and basically gives up everybody. His

girlfriend does the same thing. So these eighteen year old jazzercise instructor Karmen, she confesses to typing up the ransom letters and her parents have to put up their house to bail. He speaking of the ransom letters. So can I just tell you that I am positive that the FBI seizing the typewriters at the community college is like the most exciting thing that's ever happened there, and they still talk about it. They came in Dan their jackets is the Blues and two's coming in. So David Butler Jr.

Because he you know, makes a plea deal. He quickly goes to arrangement. And I want you to picture this just lightly his arraignment hearing. He goes and their judges there on the bench and he tells the judge, yes, well, you know, I have to understand are I'm a businessman and uh very important kai and I don't know that little nonsense about fake kidnapping. It was a more of a deal, I don't. Judges like, excuse me, you're a businessman. How was this a Business's like, well, you know, I've

recently invested dollars in a pasta and gelato factory. Just like, excuse me what now He's like, I'm not a businessman. I'm a businessman man. So the guys like the judges like I'm sorry, did you say you have an Italian ice cream factory? And he's like that is your right, your honor. And the judges like, well, where did you get this thirty thousand dollars you invested? And David Butler Jr. He quickly confers with his lawyer and then he goes back to the judge. He says, well, I'd like to

not enter that question at this moment. You're on now what's ill gotten gains for a gelato factory? And he's wearing by the way, for his arrayment. Hearing he's wearing a T shirt and the T shirt says, trust me, what in the what? Yeah? Now as she was wearing one of those tuxedo T shirts that would be amazing now his partner cried, Joe Hikey a judge. He tries to fight the case and he decides to go on trial. He's like, I was taking to trial. I know how

to beat the system. But he doesn't count on boyfriend and girlfriend David Hampton Butler Jr. And Carmen Karin. No. They both agree to testify and they say it was his idea was double cross junction over here where they're like you're gonna get you're not getting a big cut. And keep in mind they're all facing twenty five years to life for this. This is sure they're going to so they of course, you know, they roll over the Yeah, he was his idea. He worded the ransom letters. Karmens

like I just typed. I don't even know this is you know that. The David him to fathers like, yeah, he picked the exchange side. He dropped me off and it wasn't it was all him And everyone's like, oh now, Joe Hicky's like you, mother, but he sits there, grins and bears it. And after the after everything, he's tried and he's convicted. So both Butler Junior and Hicky, though, get lucky and they are only sentenced to one year in federal prison. If you can believe it, this is

not the end of this story. Back after these, I'd like to tell you the other side of the story. David Hampton Butler, Senior. Side of the story. Elizabeth. Last week left agent David Bohner was trying to get to the bottom of the case. We then went to trial. Joe Hicky made the regrettable decision to take it to trial. Then David Hampton Butler Jr. And Carmen Cranda flipped on him and everybody ended up going to jail. What fourth grader wrote this screenplay and Hickey and then the Hubbub aerobics.

It was a twelve year old fever dreams like I'm gonna kidnap myself on a two million dollars from my dad and my Jagger sized girlfriend and I We're gonna go take that money to Sonic and my my friend Joe Hicky, said Dave Hampton Butler Jr. When he decided to kidnap himself. This was August. Meanwhile, his dad, David Hampton Butler Senior, he had his own legal troubles because on March two three, his father got busted moving pounds of cocaine. Wait so earlier that year, that same year,

months earlier, he it was coked at. His bosses at the FBI knew nothing about oops and his dad was facing a coke bus when his son decided to fake his own kidnapping. So he had real legal problems. He's moonlighting and this is why he you get that he believed the kidnapping is that he was combust and he's an informant, So he's figuring that the cartel has figured this out and they're just trying to get back at him that Thus it took him a while to go,

you know what this is? This is hanky. Now. The deal was from two to nineteen eighty four, David Hampton Butler Sr. Worked for the FBI as an undercover informant. Right now, He did all sorts of drug deals. They had him traveling internationally and the FBI is only supposed to be domestic. The CIA Islanda's international Yeah, I go down to Columbia, go down to whatever you need, move them go. Yeah, you're going to Jamaica. We'll get you the tickets, get your hair braided, have fun. Good. Well,

we'll put a sandal. You'll love it. Elizabeth recommends it to everyone. So he's and we're talking to the Bahamas, South America, everywhere. He's going, right, but he's also working domestically. They haven't flying out to Arkansas for drug deals to fabulous Arkansas. And uh so the FBI has got him,

you know, turned out drugs everywhere. Right, He's got this Miami supervisor who's super pleased with him because, according to his supervisor, who testifies that to this David Butler Senior quote helped the FBI recover more than eighty million worth of drugs, boats, vehicles, and planes eighty million dollars in nineteen eight three. So that's some serious coin, right. Yeah.

Now supervisor would also testify that quote, David Butler was no doubt the top informant the FBI had operating in South Florida during the early part of that's a big statement, exactly. You know, this is Tokayne Cowboy era. So what's a little light drug smuggling on the side. Exactly, what's twenty

two pounds of cocaine here there between friends? Now, just to kind of put some of these numbers in perspective of what he was moving, I want to tell you about there was a thousand pound pot bust that he was in charge of that coincidentally was a load seased in Arkansas. He was moving pounds the right. They seized this load and then he flew it in on a small private plane. The FBI sees is that they then

make him the hero of the moment. He's done this huge thousand pound pot bust, right, So this is amazing FBI agent rustled dugger, he says in his court testimony. Quote Adler set the load up, he renegotiated with the smugglers involved, and it actually flew the load in for the government. Right, So he's like a drug smuggler for the US government. Now, Elizabeth, I'd like to go to close your eyes for a rare second picture it. Okay,

you're in Arkansas. Sorry about that, don't apologize. I love Arkansas. Actually, so you're in the middle of remember we love everywhere. Yeah, well, no, we've been in Arkansas. Remember together. We were in that town where they put us off the forty Palestine, Arkansas. Yeah, we were driving an across country. There was an accident.

Google Maps rerouted us. Yeah, and we've got to hang out in that very interesting town of Palestine and there well yeah, and it was like all the people in town, they brought up lounge chairs to watch the traffic, watch the traffic through There was that the red headed boy with a bull whip. Yeah, just like showing off for everything. He's ripping the tree. People got a crowd. Hey, mom, I gotta cross. It was so harmony. Karn, Oh my god.

Yeah you Murer took a picture of him and he's turned and stared right at us, and there's no way he could have heard the click because the windows were up, and was like that kid's got it. So that place the middle of the night, your standing looks to be an enormous grass field. A landing strip has been mowed down. This makeshift airstrip is filled with road flares, because I know you love road flares. This small plane approach of the landing strip, descending from the nights Guy. The pilot

is a young man, a friend of David Hampton. Butler Senior. A total pro pilot who puts the plane down on the grass field airstrip like he's a combat air veteran or better yet, a drug smuggling pilot. And this pilot who David Hampton Butler Seniors worked with numerous times is now officially a drug smuggler thanks to him because he's doing his first big load for the government, so they

now know who he is. He'll show up later on in the stories, but for now, he's this pilot and David Hampton Butler Sr. He's waiting at a truck and with him are two undercover FBI agents, but you can't tell that from where you are standing in the field.

They just look like two guys. Now, the truck meets the small plane that pulls onto the landing strip and you watch the offload bales of pot onto this truck and they loaded and it takes them a little while because it's a it's like probably about a thousand pounds of pot. Right, you walk out in the field and you ask them, hey, do you mind if I catch your ride? Was like, what are you doing in this field?

The agents are totally thrown but David Ampton Butler Sr. He recognizes you and he's like, yeah, cool whatever, man, come on, because I got a pull with Yeah. And also he had so much fun with you last time, and you're really chill when he had the whole thing with his son. So David Ampton brother seen. He tells you hopping back with the pot and you're like cool. Beats you hop in the background and you the pot bales. David Ampton brother seen. You're in the two Undercabry FBI agents.

You all drive across multiple states until you reach a toll and fuel plaza located on the floor to turnpipe. Am I in the back of the truck pickup truck? It's dusty? Do I have at least like a band? Damn? You got like one of the Mexican blankets is on the side of the road and keeping your warm. You're like doing like the real American like drug. It's so good. Yeah, it's awesome. It's cross country drug. You're doing. You're doing great. By the way, Thank you so much. So you're back

in Florida and you thank them for the ride. You kept the pot bails from blowing out, not that they would. Yeah, did I have to lay flat on top of them? And they go over a bump and we all fly up and then land. You have to grab the blue tarp again pull it back down. So you tell him, look, I'll find a new ride from here. I'm good, I'm almost home. They're like, all right, cool David Hampton Butler

Seniors like points at you. I'm stuck because I'm still imagining like green bales of hay or they're in like that, like um coffee sack, damned pot pre duby Colombian pot. So as you're standing there and you're geting ready to say goodbye to your man David Hampton Butler Senior, and you're like, hey, it's been at such time. I can't believe we're back in Florida together. This is so wild. He's like, yeah, maybe next time and we'll call me. These two people walk up. They can tell from their

accents they're not necessary the English speakers. Turns out that they're a Cuban and a Colombian, which you very quickly part from the accents and they're like hey, and they know David Hampton, but they're senior. You're like, oh, I will leave you to do with a quickness for bags of cash like a swirl of dust where I was standing. So and now as you are, you know, walking across the toll and fuel plaza, you watch the Cuban and Colombia and they briefly talk with the undercover FBI agents.

They get out of the truck, The Colombian and the Cuban get in the truck and they drive away. You're like, that's kind of odd. But what you don't know is that the FBI has rigged the truck. They put in a kill switch so that the truck's engine will suddenly cut out whenever they had a button. So the agents go get in their car. They follow from a discrete distance miles down the road, not in a place that you can see. They hit the kill switch, the truck dies,

engine fades away. The car pulls off on the side of the road, on the side of the highway in the last floor to the highway, patrol pulls up because they've been told this is going to happen. They swoop in, but they act like, oh, sir, are you having trouble with your vehicle? What is this in the back? Is this hey? And they're like no, no, no, say so it turns out not hey. They Florida Highway Patrol. They

quickly figured this out. They arrest the guys and all of this is done, This whole theater of arrest, the multiple state lines being crossed. All that was to throw off the scent of the FBI stitch David Hampton Butler because he's so good. They don't want to lose their number one informant. This is just one example from the mini tales of David Hampton Butler Sr. And his work

for the FBI. And once wanted you to keep that in mind because he was doing this and each time he did these things, he was putting his life at risks. And what he didn't know is he's also, if he was honest with himself, he's putting his family's life at risk. That's also true, and that's something that they don't seem to think about. Well, that's why he was so worried about his son being kidnapped. But you don't really think

about it until his son was gone. Once he got then all of a sudden, everything became real for him. And then it's like he's not moving hey, he's moving hey, And is it worth it? He has to ask himself. Well, also, I haven't told you this, but but David Hampton Butler Senior, he wasn't just moving drugs. He wasn't just a drug trafficker. He was also working in organized crime and he was

working international terrorism. So the FBI had him working the fields, all places where people will kill you for what you know. So he's in South America, he's in Columbia, and he works out that there is this intersection between drug trafficking and international terrorist funding. And so this is the early eighties. He stumbles upon a round contra on his own. He's like, the guys, I guess he gave us quote significant information in this regard. So I'm thinking about how many people

may want this guy to be killed. So this is all the stuff that the Bureau is not helping him with. But you can see why they may be a little guilty about, Oh, your son got grabbed, can help get him back right. So the other thing the FBI doesn't know is that David Hampton Butler Senior has a whole other identity, a whole person like Chris Gaines. Yeah, his name is John Craig Beazy of HIC Cargo, Illinois. Busy Hey, busy. Yeah,

So John Craig Busy. He has a driver's license, a social Security card, he has a birth certificate, he has the complete alias. Right, you have another family, okay, but he uses this for when he travels internationally. So on March two three, he decides, I'm gonna try this domestically. So he goes out and he is John Craig Busy of Chicago, Illinois for a twenty two pound cocaine deal. It doesn't go well for J. C. Deuzy. The six million dollar deal goes south and that's about its eighteen

million dollars today, so some big money. The question is was David Hampton Butt the senior working with the FBI at the time of the twenty two pound cocaine deal or not? Was this a freelance gig? Was this professional? Where did this fall in? Right? So the night he gets busted, he's in Greenville, South Carolina, and the city cops happened to arrest the people he gave the drugs too. They catch them and guys like, oh no, we got this from these guys at Howard Johnson. They tell him

the room number. So the cops drive out to Howard Johnson's and they find like knock on the door. David's like, oh, is it my macaroni and cheese? He opens it up and it is not room service. It is the local cops and then they arrest him for being a cocaine smuggler. So what does he do? He tells the cops, Hey, man, it's cool. I'm with the FBI. So they're like, oh, really, do you have any identification? He's like yeah, here you go. John Craig Busy Like okay, John Craig Busy. So they

call up the FBI in Miami, Florida. They're like, hey, we got this guy here, John Craig Bausy. They're like who. He's like David Hampton, but they're senior like oh yeah, yeah, we know him. They're like, okay, well we just busted him on a twenty two pound cocaine deal here in South Carolina. And the FBI in Miami's like, he did whatnot with with the cocaine? You say? They're like yeah yeah. The supervisor gets on the phone, he's like, what is he doing in South Carolina with a cocaine deal? Miami?

FBI they have no answers for wise. They're supervisors, like I did tell him, I don't have anything on my schedule. This is news to me, right. So David Hampton but Their Senior, he gets charged for the cocaine distribution possession. He's now looking at a new twenty five years behind bars, so lucky for him. In July, his trial gets postponed because the FBI needs to figure out is this legit? Is this not legit? So they're going to try to figure out anybody give this guy the cover on this. Now.

The next month, David Hampton Butler Jr. Decides to kidnap himself. This is the last thing we need, darn it, Dave. So, after his son's fake kidnapping and gets sorted out and his son gets arrested, David Hampton Butler Senior goes back on trial for his cocaine bust. So now the trial gets kicked back up and we kick over to the

spring and he goes back to Greenville, South Carolina. He's in a courtroom and during his trial, David Hampton Butler Senior attempts to portray himself as this undercover FBI informant. He goes over all the bus he's done the traveling internationally.

He has different agents coming through his supervisor, gifts testimony this guy is amazing, And the prosecution meanwhile focuses on the fact that the Miami FBI never asked him to fly to South Carolina, did not know he was there, and this is apparently a freelance night move regards what he had done this and one in particular, and so the jury is like following along with this, And then there is the damning witness who testifies that David Hampton

Butler Senior hadn't just been the pilot looking to make a few hundred bucks on this deal. He'd been there when the Colombians met with their contacts in Florida to arrange the whole deal. So he's like, oh, yeah, there's that right. So the pilot who he had had hired to fly in Darkansas, this pilot was involved in this one. He eventually flips on him. He's like, yeah, yeah, he brought me in on this. It's not legit. So he goes down right between all of this and the handlers

and at my mb FBI. He has nobody to cover his back. So what does David Hampton Butler Senior do once he has found guilty, Well, he sent his five years for cocaine possession. He's got he's looking at fifteen years for conspiracy charges. And what did his son say? Does he flip on somebody? And well, his son warned him when he kidnapped himself, none of your old tricks. So David Hampton Butler Senior immediately to his book of

tricks and starts looking for a way out. So on April second five, now the US Court of Appeals affirms his conviction after he appeals it. So he here, he tries his first trick. I'll appeal it. That doesn't work. April two, they're like, yeah, man, you're going to prison. He's like, damn it. Now at this point he's out on bail. The bail amount is, he's out on seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars bond. So that's normally enough to keep a person in homebound. Not David Ampton got

two million floating around and fly planes. He likes to get international with it. So when the U. S. Marshalls show up at the Butler home, there is no David Hampton Butler Senior there. Now Junior is like going, hey, I'm about to go to prison myself. So you guys, you guys looking for me. They're like, no, no, no, yeah. So David Ampton Butler senior is gone. He has kidnapped himself now, but he left no ransom notes. It's just gone,

all right. So the seven years on the bench that the judge William Kato Jr. Another junior, had been on, he had never once seen a single person do anything like this. So he's stunned and he basically tells the bail bondsman, I don't care. This is on you man. You're out seven dollars unless you can find this guy you got until he basically goes until I reconvene court til like Thursday, right, and the guys like, what are

you talking about? So federal court gets reconvened. No David, but their senior, the bail bondsman shows up and he's like, I goes in bad news for your judge. Are you for real? Right now? He really didn't show up. He's like, well, he called me. He's like, what do you mean he

called me? He called me last night and he said, hey, man, I'm sorry about what's going down, and he promised me, Look, I'm out of the country right now, but I will come back as soon as I can, just gonna make a little money, just like you are you telling me this is really what he did? Like I swear to gud he called me last night. He's like, okay, man, you're out your money. So sends out the U. S. Marshals. They scour the no Nation, They call up the Royal

Canadian Mounted Police. They checked the Great White North. Everybody's looking in the US, Virgin Islands, Puerto Rico, the Bahama is anybody who could possibly be looking under US law or Alliance agreement is looking for this dude. Nothing. Nine hours of U. S. Marshall deputies time is spent, absolutely nothing. The bail bondsman has to show back up and he's like, um, your honor, who's really hurting. He's like, look, man, I

don't know to tell you. So the bail montsmen, he's like, puts out a reward of his own fifty for any information leading to his rest. Nothing. This dude has kidnapped himself in a way that his son should have paid attention. Now, it turns out in January, though he makes one little mistake. He gets arrested in Vancouver by some Canadian cops on

some nonsense. The local cops are about to release him when they run his identity and it turns out he's not going by Craig Beazy at the time, so the US Assistant attorney, who happens to be scanning the reports for the North American like justice system, sees this name go by. He then spent sixteen hours on the phone over his weekend trying to get the Canadian cops not to release this guy before he can get U. S. Marshals there. The Canadian cops are like, oh, man, really,

okay at lunch we're gonna release him. They're like, no, no, a little longer, okay, dead nerve because then we got a new shift and I don't wanted to tell Bob about this, and they're like, could you just hold him till the U. S. Marshals get there? Okay, Man, but if tea time he's using their jeers or oh no, he wasn't using busy. He's going by David Hampton Butler. That's why popped right and comes through and then so go Brad like you know, the fax machines or whatever.

So David Hampton Butler's juniors tricks finally fail him and he is caught and returned to justice, handed over to the U. S. Marshals and uh boom, he's going to have to now spend twenty five years in prison. His son must have finally been pleased to see his dad face justice right now. During his ne'er do well friend Joe Hickey's doomed trial, his son actually did speak to his relationship with his father, and David Hampton Butler Jr. Spoke very candidly, and I quote he said, he has

never really been the kind of father I wanted. I had suspicions about his business, but he would never really tell me about it. I couldn't understand why he was doing what he was doing and endangering his family. So there's more confuse kid, right, So that's why he decided, you know what, I'm going to start him for two million dollars because he doesn't pay enough attention. So anyway, did use his dad a lesson. He does this and they both learned lessons, and after one year he's free,

and after twenty five years dad looks to be free. Now, this whole story, as you pointed out, is basically like a Disney Channel movie written by Harmony Corn and directed by Don't of the Safty Brothers. It's pretty much an insane family tale that would only happen in Florida. It's time gems meet spring breakers. So Elizabeth, what's our ridiculous take away? Oh, heavens, I'm taking away a lot today, taken away. The bags are loaded. I see that. I thought you were just packed and ready to go, and

I am I have a bale of green head. Get the scissors into all the magazine letters. Okay, a little typewriter. My takeaway is that, you know, go get family counseling. Don't do this self abductions, right. I mean, it's just doomed from the get go, because honestly, he gets two million from his dad. Let's say it all went off. Then what he goes back and he's still dating the gals and two million hanging around. Now, well, I imagine they were going to probably go somewhere else, open a

nice gelato business in the Bahamas or whatever. You know, they had plants, dreams, studio and gelatto factory. I don't think they thought every buying them put their dreams together. For me, Elizabeth, and thank you for asking, I don't want to know. I think the ridiculous takeaway is that I'm a Zarain Walter Burnett the Third. I understand what it's like to be named after your father, and it

can be weird trying to create your own identity. But I think the point is to focus on not that and actually focus on the other part, which is you never fully know anyone. That's fair, right, Like not even your own father and mother, people, your sister, your brother, people you think you know really well. Everyone has secrets and they have sides to themselves. They don't show anyone, and sometimes their secret is that they're an undercome every

FBI informant. You know that you don't know what the secret kind of huge. But my point is is leave some room for the unexpected. Just like you know, there's always something you don't know, and be cool with that exactly. The not knowing is pretty cool. Yeah, we love that. Who knows what? I know nothing, So it's awesome. But thank you for joining us. I am Elizabeth Dutton and over there that's Zaren Burnett the Third. Online Every ridiculous

crime about Twitter and Instagram. You got a tip for us about a ridiculous crime you'd like to hear about. Hit us up. You want to confess the Ridiculous Crime. We do not recommend you, but please hit us up. I recommend Elizabeth loves them. Email us every Ridiculous Crime at gmail dot com. Ridiculous Crime is hosted by Elizabeth Dutton and Zaron Burnett, produced and edited by Cocaine Cowboys preferred travel agent Dave Couston. Researches by fake kidnapping expert

and pretend bank robbery enthusiast Marissa Brown. The theme song is by Thomas Jane, Fonda's biggest fan, Lee and Travis. I'm more of a jazzer, science Officionado Dotton, executive priests or bench officer. That is not my cocaine Bowling and nol. Yes, that is also not my cocaine Brown. We did quiet say it one more time. We dequeous crew. Ridiculous Crime

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