A Snowball’s Chance

like a colony of bats. Um you know what jugglers is? Um? A juggalo of jugglers and never thing of of jugglers. Oh that's fun, which, like you know, you never see a group of juggle I guess you do see a group of jugglers outside the Loser Convent And I'm just kidding. Collective noun for silences. Uh, there's a rumba of rattle snakes and the Kingdom of rats, which is kind of like a rat king which don't google that people. My favorite a death row of turkeys. Oh that is good, right,

I mean a lot of these. There are multiple collective nouns, phrase groups. But a death row of turkeys. Yeah, that's that's up there. Yeah. Is there a writing desk of ravens? Sure? Never more. Well, I've got something ridiculous for you. You've got it's probably way more ridiculous than that I have all the time in the world. Oh excellent, because this one so wild one it will take me a second to tell to you. You're ready. Yes, it's about a Texas town. I mean, you know, I like Texas towns,

and it is Texas town in particular. It gets taken over by twelve hundred college age military cadets who are eager to win a rivalry prank war that involves now take notes to private detectives, multiple high speed car chases, a night raid on an armory and a depot, a town, telephone lines being seized, casual gunfire, mass arrest, wrongful imprisonment, and a two pound owl. Oh okay, this is ridiculous crime, but podcast about absurd and outrageous capers and cons. It's

always murder free and ridiculous. Elizabeth. Before we dive into the insanity of this story, I'd like to give you a little context. I love contact, right, I figured you do. Now you also love Reddit, right, Like, I don't really check on anybody, but I know you're like the lurker. Yeah, I don't post. I just you just read lurk rather Well, there is a post a couple of days ago. He might have seen it. I don't know. This guy put forward a theory that the University of Alabama doesn't exists.

That one, yeah, and they say, he said, basically, well, I'll just quote it. He said, conspiracy theory. Quote, Alabama is not an actual school. It is just a football team. And then he makes his case and I continue to quote. The title says it all. I don't think Alabama truly exists as a school. There are no classes. If you somehow break into one of the buildings on campus, you'll find dusty storage rooms with US jock straps and Satanic altars to bear Bryant's demon ghost. I have met so

many damn many Alabama fans roll tad. They say, if you ask them what year they graduated, they will usually hit you with and never been to college, Like that's the most ridiculous thing they've ever heard. I live and work in the South. I've interacted with fans of every other SEC team, and most of them have actually attended the university they route for. I have never not once met an Alabama fan that went to Alabama. That's incredible, right,

I can get behind that that kind of theory. So he does as you know, Uh, he gets a response on Reddit. He had had to post an edit, and so I quote, um, there are some very humble gentleman visiting me. Every word I've said is unjust. I now know. Maybe I've just been stressed lately and I wanted to be the center of attention. Hopefully my new friends can correct my ignorance on the beauty of an Alabama education. Nick Saban is handsome and intelligent and every man or

woman's dream. I've shown my jealousy of their degree programs and anyone would be lucky to go to school and Tuscaloosa. May God have mercy on my soul, and mate Elephant's tramp will be if I ever transgressed again. He should have held fast on that one. I'm just glad he found the truth in the way of Alabama football because also I'm I'm legally required to say this because it will be broadcasting Alabama rural tides. So you know there

you go. Bear. Now you lived in South Carolina. We've talked about this, and uh they're an SEC style like fanatics for football in that area that got Clemson, You've got the University South Carolina Gamecox. Now does that hold true? Like the Alabama fans where you'd meet people who are like, they're like, oh, yeah, I love Clemson and you're like, oh, what you're to graduating? Yeah? Oh I ain't never been to school. Yeah. I mean when I moved down there,

people would say who do you root for? Clemson or USC? And of course, coming from California, I'm like Trojans, are you kidding me? And so then I I was educated on that that it's the cos and uh so they everyone said I had to choose and I was like, like, you know Kelly on nine o two and no, I choose me. So I wouldn't want to pick a side. But then I was you know, I'd ask people, oh, you went to Clemson where you like, you know, an agg major of some sort, and no, they didn't go

to Clemson. And same with the most almost every USC fan. Yeah that most of them didn't go to those schools. They went to college. They just didn't and they wanted to support the big But I'll tell you, the most maniacal fans are the Clemson fans who actually did go to Clemson. Why the most maniacal, Like that's all. They wear the clothes like they don't know any other clothes and gear and they're super into it, which you know, hey, respect, you love your you love your alma mater. Yeah, fire

up that tiger rag. Yeah. But you know what, I choose me so for that that you went to Davis for college and they have a football program and to now an nt double a team. You did you go to games? Did you care about? Like once or twice they had? You know, I went to games? Did you? Nobody was it like a thing like because you know, I grew up in Davids' my hometown, so we rooted for U c D. And I know that idea of

being the county rooting. And now obviously it wasn't like oh I was like eleven, so it was like you to go to school there. Nobody thought that, but we looked. We see the players walking around town. They were huge to us. It might as well be like an NFL star and NBA star. We loved the team, but we noticed the college kids. You guys didn't give it. You didn't know anything about the teams, didn't know like the

game was on Saturday. I kind of stumbled into it a couple of times, and I was always distracted by the like associative activities like the T shirt canon. Oh you mean it's a game campus, we're in. The fullback just fires a shirt cannon at the other players know. And then here's here's the thing. I seem to recall that they I think I made this up, and now I think it's real. Someone put a burrito in the T shirt cannon. I don't know if it really happened.

I think I was imagining it that they would go burrito madness and like fire burritos that would explode and people. But like I guess, you know, if you ask me, I'm like, yeah, totally, I saw that. I don't think that actually happened. You know, it's all a blur colleges barrito madness. I love that. Well that is so that's about the extent of my football knowledge. I'm not a

football person. I know this, I definitely know this. It's the community aspect of football that I find really fascinating, especially college football, because people will, you know, find themselves in a team and they will go to war for their team. Oh yeah, which brings us to this story. So this story takes place in nineteen seventeen. Right now, that was the year that we would enter World War One. This is just before then. This is in January. We enter in April. This is in January. Is that the

year football was invented? No, we can just say yes, if that helps you. This is the year of football was invented. And so when they're inventing the game of football, it took place in Texas. They invented football in Texas, Texas A and M, the Agricultural Mechanical School. Yes, they were playing Rice University, but in this instant, since it was January, which is after football season, they decided to play a football game on the basketball court. And they

wore basketball uniforms. And then they'd used a basket in the world, so they used basketball. So they just played basketball. It was a basket. They just really through the basket. I'm just saying it's a basketball, Okay. I just didn't want you to get too jarred because I know you've just become a fan of football. Yeah, it was just invented. Yeah, it's a brand new sport. You were there. The basketball game that they played was Houston's Rice University. His college

stations Texas A and M. Right, big rivalry. Basketball was a huge sport at the time. And although it was a really interesting game because when they won the game, the score was thirteen. So Rice beats Texas A and M and embarrasses them. I'm glad you know that. So this was also the Texas A and M's first victory over a right sports team in three years. Right, they're just fired up about this. They go big, they're celebrating,

they're doing everything they can. They're getting drunk, they're yelling, they're screaming the drive around and their Model T cars and the campus. Right, but there's not enough. They need something else, a symbolic expression of their victory, something they can hold on to, right, something to unite them and give them this moment. So what do they do. They're like, let's cast about and find something that will we can always have this feeling, right, And they find exactly what

they need. The Texas A and M basketball players, some fans, some students, and some non student alumni. They all discover that rice is left their mascot behind and it's unprotected, right, And their mascot is an owl that is about the size of a man, about a six ft tall owl. It's not real. It's a statue where it's got a wooden understructure, has like canvas skin stretched over it. It weighs two hundred pounds. It is a huge structure. Did a man climb up inside of it? No, it's just

a statue that they carry around. It's more of yes and effigy. That's probably the better way of putting it. So this effigy, this canvas creation of their's, it's filled with sawdust and excelsior, which is a stuffing material. So, right, isn't that a great word, excelsior. It's always like that on Stanley's favorite words. Also on the motto of the New York State. It just means like ever also means stuffing,

New York stuffing. So this, uh, this wolf stuffing that's filled in this bird is what gives it its volume, it's weight, it's shape, and then obviously the wooden understructure. Right, So the thing weighs too, hundred pounds and it's six ft tall. It's basically like picking up a man, right, like a big football player sized guy. Now, these guys they pick up this owl and they run off with it. And they managed to like get away without any of

the Rice students catching them, right. And then you have to keep in mind also that these Texas A and I'M students, they are Corman, they are cadets because Texas A and M at this time was a military institute that required to students to be cadets. And coming in just a few months, these kids are all about to go off. They all will be released to go join World War One. And at this time they're training for the war. So they're on war footing. They're like war craze.

They are already in a military mind. So they start to act like this is an operation. They're ready to get their faces shot up. So they go and they grabbed this owl and they they you know, back all off with it into the dark. They loaded into a car. They drive to the train station. They load the owl onto the train station. They handed over to the Wells Fargo agents. They go get this back to college station and don't tell anyone you have it. And then They're like, okay,

you're gonna pay for the rights, that's all. Yeah, exactly, So they do. They put it on the train, they loaded up, and they take the owl back to Texas A and M Right. The Rice students they learn about this when they read it in the news. The Texas A and M. They put it in the news. It filters over to Houston and then they're like what so wait, they got all the way home and they didn't realize they forgot a twod o. No, no, this was that the game was in in Rice. So Texas didn't go

back and the Texas A and M s didn't go back. Yeah, so the Right students are just missing there checking it. They weren't. They weren't thinking it was in charge of cleaning the owl after the games. That's a really good question. I will put that to our researcher and get back to you on who's an owl cleaner here? So, Texas A and M Right they have the owl, they've managed to get it back, and the Right students figure this out.

So what are they gonna do? They lie? They decide, you know what, we're gonna say they didn't steal the owl. So they build a new owl, and they put that on campus and they insist that's the original owl. Like when a kid loses the stuff, the parents get an identical one. So they try that and that all the thing that has to do is pretty much suffice for all of the students and the local population. They can show the newspaper, we'll see we still have our owl.

But they know the truth. So like, we got to get our owl back. So seventeen students get together, a bunch of student athletes, members of the track team, football team, basketball team. They'd create the Owl Protective Association. So they decide, you know, two days after this owl of stolen, that they were going to get their owl back. And so then they hire a private detective. That's their first move, Like,

we need somebody to find out where the owl is. Yeah, so get get ourselves a private dick, and we'll get him to go looking for it. So the private detective, they're like, they go and they meet this guy and he's like a grizzled nineteen seventeen private detective probably you know, like I don't know, beat up railroad strikers for the Pinkertons. I don't know this guy. He's a hard dude, right, So they pay him to travel to college station and

hunt around for the owl. He does, He's like, okay, I'll go out to college station and i'll telegraph you guys when I find it. Right, So the private dick takes the students money, goes off to college station. They don't hear from him. Maybe we made a mistake. So they decide, okay, we need to go over to college station to find out what's going on. So they have to sneak onto the campus. Remember these are all cadets. So they go to the store like the Army Navy store,

and they get some army uniforms. Right, but they didn't already have uniforms. No, these are the Rice students are just college students, are just like rich Texas A and M is So the Rice students have to go get uniforms so they can sneak onto Texas campus. Right. So they managed to do this. Now they have they have other uniforms and they're gonna go. You have to understand Texas A and M As they told you military institute. So they have real military officers who were armed as

centuries on the campus. They've got bull sergeants, so as they call them who run around, who tell the students what to do. So they're sneaking onto essentially a military like in Texas, right, So the right students, they got their work cut out for them. So when they get to town, turns out their detective was on the case. He didn't just take their money and deal away into the night. That's what I thought when I was reading this, certain that he did, you know, find the guys who

like may have stolen it. He's like, I couldn't find the owl, right, I hate to tell you guys. They're like, man, that sucks. That's terrible news. To dark night. It's raining. They're like, well, we already came all the way to College Station, which is about like a ninety mile trip. So they're like, I guess while we're here, we can hunt around. So they hunt around on the Texas A and M campus, pretending to be student or cadets rather, and they have with them to transfer students who know

the university. So they're like, okay, where's where It's like the dormitories, where is the where would they put this? Right turn coats? So the scouts they send out, they search all of the buildings except for the dormitories because there'll be too many people who may recognize them. But everything other than that, they're avoiding centuries, military guards, the whole bit. They can't find the awl. No luck, right, So the O p A. The their their scouts to

go off. They return to Houston four more days past the starting to sweat people to question the owl they have in the campus because they quite look right. So they're like, okay, well this maybe beyond us. We need to hire a new detective. So they're rich kids, they throw some money together and they hire a second detective. This dude's in him, I swear to God, is snowball

the only thing he's referred to a cat? Snowball? Yeah, Like he's a cat like snowball the cat producer Dave spot On with the with the acknowledgement of the snowball is essentially like his code name. But it's the silliest damn code name he could come up with in Texas. Right, So Snowball shows up on your heart, bitt and detective, what do you guys need? Right, And they're like, Snowball like the nose two no, no, no, I think he's just a sweetheart. So he's just a little powder problem.

So I'll find your two hundred pound owl mascot or whatever I got right, And so Snowball drives out to college station and he starts snooping around and he poses as a Houston area newspaper reporter. He's like, I heard about the owl nab and I want to get the story. And kids are like, oh, that's great, yeah, because they want the story to go back to Houston and embarrass all the right students, so they never questioned the story.

He manages to get in and meet the actual Texas A and M bird nappers to show him the bird because he's like, I need pictures for the paper. They're like, okay, we'll take it this way. They take him up to the place where they're hiding the bird. He snaps his photos and he's like, okay, the bird's here, and he's like, thank you guys, pretends to be a reporter and leaves, and then he goes out to the telegram office telegrams Rice and he's like, you know, they they've got the bird.

He sends a coded message. The bird's nickname is Sammy. That's what the Rice students call him. So he sends his coded message, Sammy is fairly well and would like to see his parents at eleven o'clock. Exactly. So, now the plot is completely in motion, and after this short break, I will be right back to tell you the next installment in this insane too. Okay, Elizabeth, you're ready for

more of the great Owl theft? Yes? Please? Okay? So the Rice students, right, They now know that the bird is still fine, it exists, and their detective Snowball has found it for them, So they need to get into action, right. The seventeen members of their O p A are called out on a raiding party and they're ready to roll the Owl Protective Association. Sorry, I should keep you up

with the acronyms. So they decided that Snowball's message and a quote was a signal that the owl had been located, and then his capture was now a matter of daring. So daring is called for, and daring is what they're prepared with a feat Exactly, So, the seventeen members of the O p A, the Owl Protective Association the rock up in two old Fords and a Hudson Super six. Load up all seventeen people in these three cars right.

The second car, the second card just mentioned the Hudson Super six that was introduced in nineteen sixteen, much like professional football. So it was called the Super six because at an in line six cylinder engine, it was the one of the fastest cars of his time. It was a high performance engine. Like I said, the Rice students, rich kids, right, so they've got this card has a distinctive seventy two horsepower just blazing. That's forty more horsepower

than you get from a similar size Hudson the year prior. Right, So we're talking like real fast. Now, if you're wondering top speed, seventy five miles per hour for our non American listeners are twenty kilometers now. Fun fact, the Jode family when they went west in the Grapes of Wrath, what they were driving in was a Hudson Super six. Now, uh, this is what it looks like. I'm just gonna show you a picture on Instagram, as I will, and it's the Hudson Super six is probably one of my favorite

cars of this area. Just looks really cool. Right, how many did that seat? I'd probably take, like you know, standards five six people and this we had seventeen boys, and this is like in the arrow and people would try to see how many people they could fit in a telephone booth, you know, like they were really into

like squeezing. It was likely that's more the twenties, but I'm saying the leading up to this is at the college era of raccoon hats and big fur jackets and like, let's see how many people we can get in this, you know. Yeah, So they're doing all of that, and there's a Texas kids, so they go big with it. So the other two cars, those are the two old Forts. And when I say old Forts, everybody back then they

just referred to They only read the newspaper accounts. They just said old Forts because there was the only the Model T. They didn't have a bunch of Forts. There was like previous Model A. But now we're to the Model T. The old Tin Lizzy right, top speed forty two miles per hour. Yeah, and for the non American listeners, that's sixty kilometers per hour. So these are, by the way, this is what the Tin Lizzie looks like in case

you'd like just a quick recollection. So it's the classic car that you think of, like the buggy if you will. So we have seven exactly exactly. So we have seventeen young men loaded in these two open air cars with thin tires, overloaded with a bunch of football players, and they're headed out into essentially dirt roads for a hundred miles to get to College Station, Texas from Houston. There, man dates is not as bad as West Texas, but

it's basically central Texas. So they're going through like some mountainous not quite mountainous region, but you know the Texas hills country, Yeah, the hill country, and then lots of wooded areas, and they are not going through easy. They're not like you know, paved roads us. Your cars are designed for driving on basically a wagon road. And it's Texas,

so they got plenty of wagon roads. So these these seventeen men, at eleven thirty at night, they reach College Station and that's when they meet up with their private dick, Snowball, right, and Snowball has got some bad news for the boys right now. There was a contemporaneous account of all this published in the Rice University student newspaper called The thresh and the Thresher, And it's Thursday, February nineteen seventeen edition. If you want to look this up on newspapers dot com.

They had a firsthand account written by members of the O p A. So we have their actual account, and I quote the detective was of the opinion that would be impossible to get the bird, and it was as it was on the third floor of the US Armory, the strongest room at A and M. But he stated there was a sporting chance to win out. So he's like, look, they got it in the like basically the fot on campus and on the third floor, so you have to fight your way in, and their military so are college athletes.

So give it a sporting chance. Right, four men decide, okay, we need to go see what the lay of the land is, and they go out on a scouting mission. Right. Their names are for the sake of the story, Full Whiler, Billops More and the leader Jimmy Waters. These four will be the only ones whose names I will be telling you because they will come up over and over again. They are essentially the leaders of this racing party. Right,

So full Whiler, billops More and Waters. They hit the track running, they go and they sneak onto campus and they are after their two h pound owl mascot. Right, So the four men they elude sentries and these bull sergeants and all the campus cadets, and they entered the US Armory on the ground floor. They make it into the building, right, So now they have to ascend three flights of stairs. They managed to do that without catching any of the watchmen who are circling through the building.

They're also you know, students who are on guard because they know they have the stolen owl and they know it's in that building, so any weird sounds or anything will immediately alert suspicions. They decide, okay, we need to do this quietly, So they take out big knives and they try to carve their way through a heavy wooden armory door. What so imagine like one of those mission style California doors were like the boards are like nine inches to carve through. Kidding, So this noise draws the

attention of a watchman. They're just slamming away into the woods. All these guys you just start going to class. Oh just wait. So jimmy water squad leader, he uh as, he just says he here's the watchman coming up to stairs, Like we need a distraction. So he's like, I'm gonna

do something insane. So he runs towards the third story window, climbs out, and then it gets the Watchman's attention before he does this, climbs out of the window and he manages to walk down the side of the building for the third story like climbing, like with his hands and his feet. Basically, he like Spiderman, climbs down the side

of the building. So the Watchman's like, what the hell, So he so he runs down to the ground floor to be there when he gets done with his three like three story climb, right, So the Watchman is there when Jimmy Waters hits the ground, But Jimmy Waters is a track star, so he hits the ground, starts running

immediately right, doesn't even like have any hesitation. The watchman chases after him, a perfect distraction, right, So the rest inside they're like, okay, we can get to it, but they hear more watchmans like, so now they're hiding in pools of darkness and shadow and they wait for twenty thirty minutes. They don't know what to do. They're like, now Jimmy's outside just running around for this whole time, trying to evade centries and students and guards, and he's

doing it for the most part. So another one of the the three who are now inside, they decide, Okay, I need to go out and see what's going on. Maybe I can help Jimmy and distract more people and you guys can get in. So he runs out there, and as soon as he gets out, there's this kid, Full Whiler. He's like trying to make his distraction. He runs right into Jimmy Waters and a bull sergeant who's

grabbed him and his questioning him. He's out there, Jimmy Waters is nervous, he's telling his family name, his family's history, he's doing everything he can to do. It's okay, it's okay. So what does full Whiler do. He just runs right up into him, knocks down the bull star Jimmy Waters, and he's scamper off right. So now the two of them start leading the bull sargeants on this mad chase. The two of them split up, so everybody's running around.

Kids cadets are starting to get involved in now they know what's going on. Meanwhile, the other fourteen members of the seventeen are watching. They're like, you know what's time to blitz the armory. We can't do this like you know, skull duggery stuff. So their new plan is charge right,

so they just run onto campus. And so now we have all seven team members the O p A running around, some biggest football players, gangly basketball players, track stars, and a bunch of adets and they're all chasing each other all around in the nighttime and the january air because remember this is also wintertime, so it's cold. So down to protect their flanks, these other members of the O p A. They secure the entrances of the US Armory.

So the guys upstairs, because everybody knows where they are, they're they're still trying to get inside, so they blocked the doors on the ground floor so that way all these bull sergeants and students can't get in. And then a couple of big college football players rush up to go help the guys knock down the door. So they're armed with crowbars and fire extinguishers that they've pulled off of the walls. So they run up and they decide, okay, we're all big guys, we'll just knock down this door.

So they try using their shoulders first. One guy runs and he gets bounced off, lands on the tile floor. Now that guy does it. Now it's not This isn't working. So then they decide we'll go in tandem. So two guys hold hands, two big football players hold hands, and they run at the door, and that doesn't work, and then two more do it. Boom, Oh, it cracks open. The door knocks down. So it turns out they didn't need all the crowbars and fire extonishers. They doesn't need

a couple of big football players and throw themselves. Right. So when the door springs open, what did they find? I have no idea. The owl is sitting there in bed with the general. No, I don't know, smoking of cigars like that was nice. I don't know. I don't know what. Nobody knows, right exactly, according to the contemporaneous accounts in the Thresher, the quote the owl was concealed

under some canvas at the rear of the armory. The six men seize the old birds, soust them in gasoline, and rushed down three flights of stairs to the ground floor, where the night watchman was encountered. Yeah, you're like, wait, gasoline, why didn't he in there? Right? Good ears? So they were confronted by this night watchman, right, and so they tell them, oh, you know, we're students from Texas A and M. We're trying to protect it. They got these

you know, bulmakers run around on campus. We're gonna go hide the bird. And what I watched him like, we are you taking? He's like right over there, and then they just run in the other direction. Night watching was like, wait, what are you doing. They run it over to a car. They throw it in the Hudson's Super six and that car takes off. This bull sergeant night watchman, he gets piste. He pulls out his forty four and starts firing. Oh yeah, so now the two so the students have to run.

They top in the tin Lizzie's the Hoppen, the sets in super six and they're tearing around. But they're not done. They don't want to just get away. They decide, let's, you know, let's car some donuts in the grass. So they start doing circles and twoing donuts and they're getting fired at mind you. So the opiates pretty stoked. They got back there at right. So, and meanwhile there's a couple of others who have not quite made it to

the car. They decided to grab some paint that they found and they paint the score of the last football game that they won zero on the side of the building in giant numbers. Right the more warning shots are firing out, Bugles are being blown, students are yelling, and at this point the OPA is like, look repressing our luck. So they decide to floor it and tear us out of there, and they managed to escape the campus. Right now, they've got to drive from College Station back to Houston.

It's about a hundred mile trip. As I told you, we should should take about an hour and have two hours, but if you're going forty two miles and then I'll take more like solid two hours. This is if they can make it there, because remember now they got hundreds of college cadets who are about to give chase Elizabeth. I'd like you to close your eyes and picture it. Okay,

it's the dark of night. It's January in Texas. The air is cold, the wind is howling as it blows, and there you are with the O P a riding shotgun in the tiled four tin Lizzie. Ahead of you was another tin Lizzy, and and ahead of that is the year old Hudson's Super six. The roads are bad and you're getting jumped and bumped around and your seat as your guys are rocking and rolling down this dark road car loaded down with other students members of the

O p A. You're all racing back to Houston. You're all fired up, you're excited, you're yelling, but you have this tiny fear inside of you because you're like, this doesn't seem like we've gotten away with that. I don't know why, right, that's that would be me. Your fears are confirmed when the first forward in the caravan, its headlights go out. HiT's a bump light goes out. You're like, that's that's no good. So now you guys are in the middle of Texas, nowhere you've got no electric lights.

There's no it's just endless darkness, right, So these headlights. So you're like, let's forget that car. Well, no, we need it. So there's too many of us. Okay, you've been in back and we'll keep going. So now they put the car with no headlights in the in the back and keep running. Right. So, now you're in the lead car of the caravan, and uh, you're bouncing a roll rolling along still, another miles passes blond. Now your lights are out. You guys had a bump your lights.

Getting is going on with you? Forards? What can I tell you a little of it? You close your mouth. So now that the lights are cut up, both boards are running blind. Right, So the Hudson supersticks takes overwards. Maybe the Fords were doing it just because they knew they had to be secret. Well they do. There's purposeful these sence. They're doing really well on the back of

the line. So let's just take it from there. Since Super six is laiding this caravan, the Fords are trying to keep up, doing their forty two miles an hour in the dark. Now before you can curse, or but I could curse, Hanry Ford's a good name. And there's another big run in the road and it tosses the Ford in front of you, hits their breaks after they land, and you slam your Ford slams into them. Boom. You

basically destroy the front end of your car. Now FOURD doesn't even operate, so now you give one less car. So everyone's like this, there's no good. As the car shuttering to a stop, you're like everybody get in the other cars. So now they got running boards, they got laps. People are just like laying on other people. People are clinging to the on the running car the back can't feel their legs. Not exactly, not at all. But now you in the one operable Ford and the Hudson Super six.

You're tearing away, all seventeen of you in there, and you and your night raid is really not going too well so far. But well, I mean, we got the elm so far. Yeah, it looks like, you know, you're overcoming most obstacle, except for you notice there's a new

obstacle emerging from the darkness. It's this bright light. And then you have you hear the train whistle and you're like, oh no, because the whole plan was to get to College Station, and there were you guys would do your raid after the last train had left, so that way there they couldn't the cadets couldn't take a train and get back to Houston. But you decided to rush it.

Remember you charge that messed up your timing. And now the train is rushing along and you look over and you spy, oh, how hundreds of students cadets laying out of every window of the limited that's running to Houston. They're screaming and shouting because they can see you, guys, and you can see them. You're not that far away. You on the dirt road, them on the tracks, and they are clipping along. It looks like they're gonna get back to Houston before y'all. So what do you do, Elizabeth? Like,

what's the move? You're still in shotgun? What's your call? I would I would stop and wait till more, ing let them go and like, you know, cool their jets in Houston and wait and wait and wait, and then meanwhile, I like roasting it up. And yeah, then I go to Austin at least call a little tour. But when it's light out then you don't need your headlights. Yeah. Good point. Well, they listened to most of your plan except for they go, you know what, we should go

one further than that, Elizabeth, Stopping isn't enough. Uh So you know, let's just go with the thresher's account, because I want you to hear it in their words quote, it was impossible to make any speed on the road. So the party turned around and started back towards College Station. They turned up the first lane they found in a

wild ride of five miles through the woods. Ensued, they decide let's head back towards College Station, and then that's not a good idea, make a right, So then they start heading north, heading north in Texas into the darkened woods, and they wrap it off into the woods, trying to make a run for it. Do you think they're going to get away with it after a quick break. I'll be back with the end of the insane too, okay, Elizabeth? So where were we car chase? Poor decisions on the

part of the association. So we're headed into north Texas, north north Dallas. Forty will come the OPA is on the run from hundreds of Texas A and M military cadets. You got a hundred miles to get back to Houston, man, however many miles to get back to College Station. One of your tin Lizzy is not working. The other one is limping after the Hudson Super six. No lights right,

hit it cars. Things aren't going well, and you now then break down again one mile down the country road that you guys have just gone, and I returned to the thresh. There's coverage the remaining forward soon gave up on the struggle and was left with five men to guard it and to draw a pursuit away from the big car containing the owl. So the rating part I was all in the Hudson Super six whatever, how many people they can load left five, there's twelve people in

this car. And yeah, there's twelve people loaded up in the Hudson Super six and a two pound owl. Yeah, so that six ft tall. So after after four so after four more miles, the Super six runs out of gas because they've not even driven all night. No worse than that, they've knocked a hole in the gas over all these rocks and ruts and roads. Right, So now the op A is like, Okay, we got no cars, we're in the middle of Texas, and we have a six ft tall, two pound owl we've got to carry.

And isn't the owl covered in gasoline? It's covered in gasoline. So hours have passed now the night is being getting to give way to dawn. So the Purple hours approaching and Snowball the private detective he's with them. He's with the raiding party actually, because he decided it was quite a sporting proposition to go along with the guys to see if he could rescue the owl to his youth. He goes off and they break up into two parties.

One of the parties will go into the closest town and see if they get gas as soon as the sun comes up, and then come back to the two cars that they're going to park and hide in some woods. That's their plans to Skins will hang out with the owl and then hide in the woods. Right, that's the plan, and hopefully they can get maybe a friendly mechanic to come and either come back with them and fix the cars, or they can load the cars up at gasoline, drive

to town and get the cars fixed there. That's the plan. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the Texas A and M cadets, Right, what are they doing in all of this? They were racing on the train. That was only some of them. There's twelve hundred students who will be involved in this chase. So how many were on the train there just sitting there on the right hands and they're waiting in Houston just be in troublemaker and then you've got like a

thousand of them coming up. They need they need to go back to We have an account from the thresher that we can give you some exact numbers. I want to give the thresher a hand, but that every time he's a thresher, all I think is like you immediately go there like that. So I quote from the hand taking thresher. The A M. M. Cadets have been busy organizing their pursuit. Everything that had four wheels had been

requisitioned and pressed into service. Eight cadets were brought up to the firing line in automobiles, motorcycles, wagons, buggies, and of course the train. This is like mad mag yes, So it doesn't take long for these eight hundred cadets, going off in every direction to find the raiding party that's out in the woods, just down on a road right now. Hold on, when they find this little rate, the raiding party, what are they going to do to them?

Just tear them limb from limy. Just wait, this is this is this is no, there's no no murdering this one. But there's some species coming up. So I returned to the thresher a detachment of cadets rated Milliican and found all of Rice's means of locomotion in the garage. So the guys who had gone off to the town of Milliican with their car. They get discovered and I continue the quote immediately took charge of the cars. Nine rice men, who had been left to delay pursued as long as possible,

were captured with the cars. One of the people captured Snowball, the private detective, Snowball kitty detective. So the other half of the raiding party, they get a messenger back from Millikan. He runs out of town and makes it back to where they are hiding the cars in the woods and tells them, you guys need to run for it. They're onto us. We don't have a car, so they're like, okay, so what do they do? They decide we're going to just run for it. So they decided to take this

two pound owl and run back to Houston. So they start running across the tall grass to save themselves. So and I quote didn't happen. Running with the two pound owl was a larger contract than the exhausted men could fill, and all hopes of taking the bird wholesale were abandoned. The A and M searchers were hot on the trail, so the eight men hid themselves in a thicket and skinned the cover off the owl and the hide given to four men with instructions to take it to Houston.

Stuffing was then set on fire as it had been discovered that the party was completely surrounded by cadets, so they burned the owl. Now the thing is is the gasoline makes it so there's not much smoke, so they were they almost get away with it, but this is one of the cadets notices the flame and then they go rushing over to where they're hiding in the thickets. So now for the guys, the leaders of the O p A. So this is full while or Drummond Uh and my boy More and Jimmy Waters, they take the

owl skin and they make a break for it. The skin others tried to distract, so Sam of the owls handed over to the fourth fastest. They're all members of the track team. They're like disgusting run for it. So they and the other ones, the other four, they lead the aggy search party that's surrounding them in the wrong direction. Right there. Again, I'm making a lot of noise. Run for it, guys, trying to get their attention. Jimmy Waters is leader of what we now call the Elusive four.

The elusive four are going to be officially a dude named Dane, a dude named Paine, a dude named Waters, and Drummond. So like old time nursery run Potters and trum getting the owl, and off they went together. So and I quote, they injured some thick woods and had over fifty men on their coat tails and no time at all. The four men had been well chosen, however,

and the pursuers were soon distanced. Remember track stars. So the squad runs two miles with with the owl skin hidden on them, and they get to a major road, right, so they start waiting for a car to pass, hoping somebody will be there. It's now morning time, right, and I quote it's now ten a m. Wednesday, and the party had been without food and water since noon on Tuesday. A well was found soon found in a small clearing,

and the four men quench their thirst. So now they're sitting there like finally getting some nourishment to keep their bodies going diet exposure exactly. So the bunch of cadets spot them and they come running across a cotton field after them to the like, oh, they're coming for us, right, They start running the original fifty cadets who were just seeing them at the thicket of woods. They come from the other direction, so they now run another two miles

under full chase. Right, the track stars are so exhausted at this point. Jimmy Waters can't run over a one foot fence. He trips over a one ft fence. Dane gets tangled up in grape vines over and over again. Then there's his dude pain. He tries to jump a four foot creek and he lands in the middle. He goes two feet. These are all track stars. They're so exhausted. Their bodies are like pulling a full zola. But they're

pretty much going to just collapse. Right. So at this point, right, we're getting into the afternoon hours, right, and I quote the pursuers were finally ditched and the refuge was taken in a thick bunch of overgrowth, where the party slept until three thirty pm, keeping one hour watches each. So now they've gone full military and they're doing one hour watches trying to get away from these cadets. So at three thirty they are awoken by the sound of a

group of cadets who discovered their hiding place. Right, So the four track stars like, we're gonna have to split up, guys, we need someone to run distractions. So now they take the owl skin, they tear it in half, they wrap it around their bodies. They've got to get out to get this owl home. So the other two run off in the other direction, making a lot of noise. Well, the two guys who have the owl wrapped around their bodies run off, and they're doing it like you know,

I don't even know they did. They have like this vim and vigor and the zeal of the French resistance, like they are willing to do do whatever to beat these military Right, so the four crawl on their bellies through the tall grass to escape. They make it out of the thicket in two different directions, right, and now the elusive for reunite. Uh. And they get to another road and they find that the road is blocked because not because of of cadets for once this time, it's

just because there's basically river water stormwater rushing past. The little bridge is blocked. Right, So they're like, okay, what are we gonna do. That's when they hear a car approach, like, oh no, right, there's nowhere for them to hide. There's nowhere to go. They can't cross the river. They're up

against the wall. And I quote a car was heard crashing through the brush and it was coming directly towards them, So the men had to interrupt their planning and hit out for cover too with the owl skin remained in hiding while the two went forward to investigate. The car was occupied by hunters and the first question was to ask the best way to get across the river? Who got the owl? Was the reply, what owl? You know?

Tell us we can help you out. So this is a group of Texas duck hunters, men, full grown ass men. They come across these kids and like we heard all about this good thing. It wasn't like a good man is hard to find scenario. Yeah, no, definitely they had. These hunters had been stopped on their way to go duck hunting, and their vehicle had been searched, so they were well aware by the cadets there in the full lockdown.

Now right down, it's not even there. So these hunters are tickled pink by the cadets trying to find the elusive force, and they're like, yeah, that we'll help you guys out. This is great, right, So the hunters like that just said, we're gonna keep shooting some ducks. So they make them wait for three more hours. Well, they get their fill of ducks. Right, once the duck hunters are done, they're like, okay, boys, seven PM, let's go back to town. So they tell them, they're like, okay,

well we can take a couple of you. Couple of you should probably stay here because you know they're gonna stop us again. So one of the duck hunters he changed his clothes with the dude named Dane, and then he hides in the back with the dude named Drummond. They hide in like a toolbox in the back of the truck, right and hunter one of the hunters and Drummond are in the back, and then Dane is upfront with the other hunter, and they take off in the truck. Right.

The truck does get stopped by cadets at the first bridge that they reach, right, it gets close examined. They managed to pass the inspection, but then right before they're about to leave, one of the cadets is like, I'm gonna go right back into town with you, like slaps the back of the truck. He climbs in back and he sits on the toolbox. No, no, I would not stop for these guys. If they were like hold, I'd look out of the military. These are armed cadets, uniforms,

pimple faced. I'd be like, now try again and just keep driving. He gets on the car, I slam on the brakes and he slides down on the hood. Then I run them over and like five months time, these are all going to be kids on the front. Well, they're like full on soldiers. Like then, they're acting like it, and I'm just telling you, fad or not. They got guns and they're like, look, this truck ain't going anywhere.

So Payne and Jimmy waters right there with the guy who's got the car right, and he gets them back to town. They get out before they get to town. He's like, you know, you guys can walk the rest of the way in. And they made that choice, and it was a good choice to make because the driver when he gets to town, he gets stopped and he gets arrested and taken and undercust by the cadets. Yes, there are three cadets in this tiny Texas town and they have taken over and I took over the town

and I quote from the thresher, you're ready. The cadets to complete control of all telephone and telegraph lines, had all roads blocked, and we're searching all trains that passed. So all means of communication and transportation were under vigilists. So they declared martial laws in this area. Is there any like, is there any authority figure over these guys military? Well, no, I mean there's just a bunch of cadets, Like who's there, who's their boss? Guys, who's going to be like Texas

College Sports. I don't know what to tell you. This is the authority so crazy. So these grown ass men, the duck Hunters, they're willing to join the resistance with the elusive four so that they then call in another friend once they get back to town, who was a doctor, and they're like, okay, now the phone lines are Meanwhile, we're all being tapped in monitors, so they have to

use a code language. So they tell the doctor that they need some capsules, and they've got some other capsules and could you bring them to the house and I'll come by. So but so the doctor knows this code like they pre established it or is he like, oh, I guess he needs He's uh, he's friendly with the hunters. This may not be the first time they've had to, like, you know, do stuff like this. So he quickly catches up with them. Right, yes, now we have pain and waters.

They go out and they climb into this car because they're going to be they were they'd waited outside of town. So the guy gets out and drives out of town. The doctor picks them up, and the car was run at high speed and all challenges ignored. They said, have they put it right? And at one point, the doctor's car with waters and pain in it, it approaches a blocked bridge right and the cadets are lining the road and the doctors like, what do you guys want me

to do? The roads blocked and he's like, they're like, is there any way out? He's like, I think I c o A. So this is a checkpoint like a warfare. Also, beanwhile, they're thirteen of their comrades who have been captured and they're being held at this bridge by the cadets. So there's hundreds of cadets and their their own comrades, if you will are standing there. Then the Doctors starts reving. His engine is like bull was hang on, so he then floors it in his like whatever nineteen sixteen car.

He drives down the ditch, punches it. He gets up to about fifty miles an hour and then rides up the other side of the ditch and jumps like the general lee from Duke's hazard. They break free from gravity for a little bit. He learned making this. No, this is a burrito cannon. This doesn't really happened. The captured member of the O p A. They go nuts. They're cheering as his car is in the air. Right. The car eventually lands with a huge crash back on earth

and then roars away at full speed. You know, old car immediately give chase. They run and get in their cards and they tear after the Doctor's car. And the doctor he's a holacious driver. This ain't his first rodeo, so he's tearing through Texas. He's enjoying the chase. Right. He manages to get painted waters over to the other house. They reunite with Dane and Drummond, who are still in hiding at this time. Now all of there together and the five of them make a break or and race

back to Houston. So the doctors like, let's go and run back to Houston. Isn't now the moment before dawn on another day, once inking we've reached the purple hour. And these four men make it back to the Rice campus at seven thirty a m. On Thursday morning, and they still had the skin of their six foot tall pounds three pieces of it. Elizabeth, you may be wondering at right now what happened to the thirteen dudes who were captured, who were cheering at the side of the bridge. Question.

But they were taken prisoner and they were held at Texas A and M in the military prison or the brig or whatever it was, right, And the president of Rice University had to negotiate with the president of Texas A and M to get the safe return of the thirteen captured members of the op A Night Rate. So he negotiates with terrorists apparently apparently see I've heard the Texans don't do that. Now you may also be wondering, and I know you were, what happened to Snowball? I

guess I am. Now it's the best part and I from the thresher. Snowball gets paraded around campus, given a regulation army haircut, turned over to the freshman for a few days. He was eventually taken to the station late at night, minus his clothes, and told to catch the train. He was said he wasted no time getting a board. Wait, what does it mean? Turned over to the freshman for a few days and he comes home? Yes, they I think you can just let your imagination wander on that one.

So the freshman turn him out and then he he's taken train station that afterwards? Did he change his name to Snowball because he didn't want anyone to know who he wanted? Do you imagine being a private detective and having to go home? How was your weekend? Okay? Could you imagine being a private detective a named Snowball B who gets hired to find like a mascot and gets into this absolute boards that you're making up in Why why Snowball? Texas College Sports? That's my answer? Oh my gosh.

I want to hear from the descendants of Snowball. We shouldn't see if we can find them. If you are a descendant of Snowball, reach out. We want to hear the real story. We would like to know how what became of snowball after that. We want to honor his memory. So, Elizabeth, what's your ridiculously My ridiculous takeaway is? I'm having a lot of heart trouble process right now, pretty much broken. Your brain can't speak. I don't know the year. Try try this. You say these two words, roll tad that

roll tide. But help? Did it totally helped? Yeah? Yeah, Bear Bryan be so happy. Hook them horns another one, see if that one works. Sorry, that's Texas hook horns. Everything feels so good at SEC football, baby, right there, CC football, everything feels so good for the losing Well. My ridiculous takeaway, thank you for asking is I grew up in the South and I still can't believe this happened like this is one of my favorite stories of

Southern sports ever. It's incredible, ulous ulous, so ridiculous. But thank you for joining us. I'm Zaron Burnett. That over there is and I'll name this Elizabeth Dutton. Do you find us online? A ridiculous crime on both Twitter and the Graham Twitter is the four the one for the discourse that's repost stuff, that's about the cases and instagrams where we put up the photos reach episode. They will reveal to you what these people look like, what the

cars look like, and so forth. The stories are posted for Giggles. Also, you can get sneak peaks for upcoming episodes emails if you want at Ridiculous Crime at gmail dot com. Thanks for listening, Thank you. Ridiculous Crime is hosted by Elizabeth Unton and Zaron Burnette, produced and edited by Dave Rhyme with Houston Couston Research is by the

President of the Rice Historical Prank Society, Marissa Brown. Our theme song is by Thomas Payne and Dane Lee and Travis super Six Dotton executive producers are Bent where the leaders of the Owl Resistance Bowland and Noel pay don't tell anyone Brown were disquiet. Say it one more time We dequeous Crew. Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeart Radio. Four more podcasts to my Heart Radio, visit the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.