You’ve talked about your past and likely know a lot of the reasons why you’ve got issues (I say with love). The problem is that even though you might know the why (or think you do), you don’t feel better. You continue to repeat unhealthy relationship cycles and you’re still not maintaining your boundaries with others. Or maybe you’re overeating or smoking too much pot. You know why you’ve got some dysfunctional habits, but that hasn’t resulted in you healing emotionally. Talking about your child...
Jan 07, 2025•1 hr•Season 7Ep. 316
Let’s face it: setting goals is easy, but sticking to them? That’s a whole different story. How many times have you started the year determined to crush your goals, only to lose steam a few weeks later? The struggle is real, and you’re not alone. Studies show that only 19% of people maintain their New Year’s resolutions by the two-year mark. So why is it so hard to stick with what we set out to do? Today we’ll talk about the biggest mistake you make when setting goals and what you can do differe...
Dec 17, 2024•45 min•Season 7Ep. 315
We’ve all had that person in our lives who constantly needs reassurance. Whether it’s your partner asking, “Do you really love me?” for the tenth time this week, your mom needing praise every time she tries something new, or a coworker who looks to you for approval on every decision, these interactions can leave you feeling exhausted, frustrated, and even resentful. But why are some people like this? And, more importantly, what can you do to manage these relationships while staying compassionate...
Dec 10, 2024•53 min•Season 7Ep. 314
Entitlement. It’s a word we toss around casually, usually about other people. (“Did you see how she cut the line? The entitlement!”) But here’s the thing: entitlement is sneakier than we think. It can show up in the most unexpected places, like our relationships, our workplaces, and even how we navigate society at large. Today you’ll get a clear picture of what entitlement is, why it happens, and (brace yourself) how it might be showing up in your own behavior. As always, I’ll give you great tak...
Dec 03, 2024•1 hr 19 min•Season 7Ep. 313
Conflicts in any relationship are inevitable . Whether it's with a partner, friend, family member, or colleague, disagreements are going to happen as we all have different needs, perspectives, and boundaries. I’ve noticed that conflict avoidance has become a bigger and bigger problem since the pandemic, and I’m here to tell you: it’s quietly wrecking your mental health and eating away at the foundation of all your relationships. It’s time to see conflict as an opportunity, not a problem. It’s ti...
Nov 26, 2024•49 min•Season 7Ep. 312
Self-doubt is that relentless voice in your head that questions your choices, your worth, and your abilities. It can make even the most straightforward decisions feel overwhelming. But here’s the good news: self-doubt is a habit of thought. And, like all habits, you can break it. By understanding its roots and applying some research-backed strategies, you can absolutely become a confident decision-maker. Today, I’ll walk you through what science says about self-doubt, why it sticks around, and h...
Nov 19, 2024•43 min•Season 7Ep. 311
Radical acceptance is about fully acknowledging and accepting reality as it is, especially when it’s something we don’t like or want to change. This approach, popularized by Dr. Marsha Linehan as part of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), encourages us to embrace what we can’t control instead of resisting it. But radical acceptance isn’t easy. The idea challenges our instincts, often triggering discomfort and frustration, especially if we’re used to holding tightly to that illusion of being in ...
Nov 12, 2024•34 min•Season 7Ep. 310
Ah, the holidays. A time of family, fun, and… overwhelm? If the thought of spending time with family or navigating the stress of the season makes you feel anxious, you’re not alone. But there’s good news! With a little planning and the right mindset, you can not only survive the holidays but actually enjoy them with my five steps for a joyful season. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/how-to-survive-and-enjoy-the-holidays-without-losing-your-mind-5-ste...
Nov 05, 2024•50 min•Season 7Ep. 309
Many of my clients have issues today that relate back to being neglected as kids, but they’ve never realized that what happened to them was neglect. They say things like, “I had a roof over my head and food,” “My mom was there when I got home from school,” or they’ll even tell me they had a happy childhood. Growing up with neglectful parents isn’t always easy to identify. If you felt unseen, unheard, or unimportant as a child, you may be living with the long-term effects of childhood neglect. An...
Oct 28, 2024•44 min•Season 7Ep. 308
Think about your relationships: Do you find yourself always giving but rarely receiving support? Are you the one everyone relies on to solve problems, listen to their concerns, or offer emotional support? If yes, you might be headed toward compassion fatigue without even realizing it. Today you’ll learn what it is, why you might be suffering with it, and three powerful tips to overcome it so you can create balance and peace in your life. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: htt...
Oct 21, 2024•36 min•Season 7Ep. 307
While a partner cheating might seem like the most obvious betrayal in a relationship, there are actually many ways we can feel let down or deceived in different types of relationships. Maybe your mom didn’t tell you about your dad’s cancer until the very end. Or maybe your partner lied about money or their past. Or maybe you just found out that your so-called best friend has been telling everyone things you told them in confidence. Whether it’s cheating, lying, or being let down in another way, ...
Oct 14, 2024•39 min•Season 7Ep. 306
Simply put, self-limiting beliefs are negative thoughts and perceptions you have (either consciously or unconsciously) about yourself that get in the way of your goals and dreams. A belief is just a thought you’ve had over and over. So, to overcome your self-limiting beliefs, you need to have new thoughts that you think over and over. But how do you do it? Today, you’ll learn how to identify your self-limiting beliefs, the big mistake almost everyone makes when they’re trying to change, and how ...
Oct 07, 2024•1 hr 3 min•Season 7Ep. 305
Mental health issues come in all shapes and sizes, which means that mental health treatment needs to do the same. I’ve long been a fan of holistic approaches which take into account the treatment of the whole person, not just specific symptoms. Today, we’ll talk about three of my favorite approaches: biofeedback, yoga, and acupuncture. We’ll discuss how all three are excellent, proven approaches for mental health issues such as substance use disorder, OCD, PTSD, ADHD, anxiety, and depression and...
Sep 30, 2024•50 min•Season 7Ep. 304
Creating a great relationship with yourself or others is all about creating healthy habits: getting into the habit of identifying and regulating your own feelings, getting into the habit of being mindful in conversations, or getting into the habit of resisting urges that sabotage you getting to your goals (yes, put down your phone and the Oreos). Creating a great relationship with yourself or others is also about breaking bad habits such as judging, criticizing or thinking your well-being is hin...
Sep 23, 2024•52 min•Season 7Ep. 303
Feeling lonely sucks! If you’re here with me now, you’ve likely experienced the pain of feeling lonely or isolated at some point in your life. Social connection is imperative for humans. It improves our mental well-being and our physical health. Studies have even shown that a lack of social connection can be more detrimental to your health than smoking or obesity! So, what do you do if you feel lonely (even when you’re surrounded by people)? Today we’re diving into the stigma of loneliness, the ...
Sep 16, 2024•45 min•Season 7Ep. 302
Parental or other familial estrangement is a real thing these days. And it’s more common than ever to block or cut off toxic friends or siblings. But is there a healthy way to cut people off so you can feel at peace with your decision and life? The short answer is, “Yes,” but you need to know the dos and don’ts. Today I’m coming at you with the three big mistakes people make when they’re cutting someone off and my five strategies for how to create healthier separations so you can find calm and e...
Sep 09, 2024•50 min•Season 7Ep. 301
In my 40 years of experience, I’ve worked with bus drivers, billionaires, movie stars, and stay-at-home parents. I’ve worked with people who are depressed, anxious and have ADHD. And I can tell you that the one thing everyone has in common is that they often struggle with feeling ineffective in their day-to-day life. I always say that the most important relationship you have is the one with yourself. When you don’t feel effective in your day, you beat yourself up, resulting in lowered self-estee...
Sep 02, 2024•1 hr 29 min•Season 7Ep. 300
One of the toughest parts of being human is dealing with others being angry or disappointed in us. You might react by being angry back, people pleasing or avoiding that person altogether. But no matter what you do, your brain likely keeps coming back to this person who’s angry at you, and you end up feeling anxious, fearful, resentful or drained. Why can’t you just let it go, and what can you do to make it better? Today I’ll teach you the four things you can do to ease your anger and anxiety whe...
Aug 26, 2024•44 min•Season 7Ep. 299
Do you feel self-conscious in social situations? Are you often afraid that others are judging you? Do everyday interactions cause you significant anxiety or embarrassment? And has this fear gotten in the way of living your life? If you have social anxiety, you might feel hopeless that things will ever change, but you’re wrong. Social anxiety is treatable and today you’ll learn my top five tips for creating a more relaxed and connected life. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: ...
Aug 19, 2024•1 hr 6 min•Season 7Ep. 298
It’s healthy and normal to get frustrated or angry from time to time. However, it’s not healthy or normal to feel frustration and anger on a daily basis. This means your frustration tolerance is too low and it’s time to develop some much-needed skills so you can feel more peaceful and connected with yourself and those around you. Today I’m teaching you my top five strategies to stop feeling frustrated and angry in all your relationships. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: htt...
Aug 12, 2024•47 min•Season 7Ep. 297
Because so many of us come from dysfunctional families, it can be hard to know if we’re in a healthy relationship or just repeating the screwed up stuff we saw growing up with that seemed normal because it’s all we knew. With a career spanning 40 years, in multiple states and countries, and having worked in every environment you can imagine, I’ve learned a lot about what it means to truly be in a healthy relationship. Today I’m sharing the top five things to look for to know whether or not you’r...
Jul 15, 2024•43 min•Season 6Ep. 296
Why do relationships fail? When I ask people, “What’s the biggest issue in your relationship?” they almost always answer, “We don’t communicate.” That’s wrong (yes, I said it). And that wrong answer has you working on the wrong things. You try out all those communication tools to improve your relationship, but they don’t work! And you know why? Because you’re not treating the cancer, you’re treating a symptom, which means you don’t get to the root, so the problems keep coming back and, ultimatel...
Jul 08, 2024•56 min•Season 6Ep. 295
It doesn’t take a genius to know that your relationship is worse off when you or your partner are under stress. A fight with your friend, money woes, that nasty commute, little Jimmy’s newly diagnosed gluten allergy, and those long work days bleed over into your relationship. The research shows that the more frustrations and issues people had outside the home, the more stress they had in their relationship and the less satisfied they felt with it! Stress will kill your relationship faster than a...
Jul 01, 2024•36 min•Season 6Ep. 294
If you have abandonment issues, you have a persistent fear of rejection or isolation in your relationships. This means you struggle with trust, codependency, healthy boundaries, and insecurity which, of course, negatively impacts your interpersonal relationships and leaves you feeling anxious, depressed and resentful. Today we’ll be talking about the signs you might be missing, the core issues behind your fears, and my top three strategies to overcome your fear of rejection and abandonment. ____...
Jun 24, 2024•35 min•Season 6Ep. 293
Do you open your eyes in the morning and your first thoughts are negative, or you notice a feeling of dread or worry lurking about? Well, you’re not alone. Morning anxiety is actually a relatively common experience and, believe it or not, it’s not just in your head. Yup. Your biology is against you too. Today you’ll learn why you have morning anxiety and my two clear steps to make it stop. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/two-steps-to-stop-morning-an...
Jun 17, 2024•41 min•Season 6Ep. 292
You can’t stop thinking about it, no matter how hard you try. You’ve got some event or interaction from your past or future on an endless negative loop in your brain and you’re feeling more anxious, depressed and overwhelmed as a result. Why do you do this when you know it doesn’t help, and how can you stop? Today I’m answering all your questions and bringing you my five steps to stop (or at least greatly minimize) ruminating and repetitive negative thinking. ____________________________ Full bl...
Jun 10, 2024•46 min•Season 6Ep. 291
The research shows that resilient people do better in every area of life. They cope better with mental health issues like depression and anxiety, health crises, as well as money problems, and they do way better in all their relationships including romance, work and parenting. Today I’m teaching you the four ways to be more resilient so you can be happier in all your relationships. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: h ttps://abbymedcalf.com/the-four-ways-to-be-more-resilient-s...
Jun 03, 2024•39 min•Season 6Ep. 290
Should You Date While You’re Going Through Therapy and Working on Healing? The short answer is no but you don’t have to wait until you’re completely done with therapy either. So, when is the right time to start dating? Today I’ll be teaching you why you should wait to date and the three ways to know that the time is right. ____________________________ Full blog and show notes: https://abbymedcalf.com/should-you-date-while-youre-going-through-therapy-and-working-on-healing Learn how to create and...
May 27, 2024•57 min•Season 6Ep. 289
He’d rather stay home, and you’d rather have dinner out. She needs alone time after work, and all you want to do is talk about your day. Introverts are often attracted to extroverts’ vivaciousness, while extroverts often want to be around the still, calm energy that introverts emit. So falling in love can feel easy, but being in a relationship then becomes hard as you have different wants and needs. So, can introverts and extroverts be happy in a relationship? The simple answer is, “Absolutely!”...
May 20, 2024•38 min•Season 6Ep. 288
So, you want to change some aspects of your personality. Maybe you’ve got a short fuse and want to be more calm. Maybe you’re shy and introverted and want to be more outgoing. Whatever your reason, you’re likely asking yourself, “Is it even possible to change my personality?” The short answer is, “Yes.” But there are some steps to make that happen. Today you’ll learn the five traits that make up your personality and the one tip (from the research, of course) that will help you make changes that ...
May 13, 2024•49 min•Season 6Ep. 287
