Hey, hey, hey, I'm bad with something for you to think about.
Happy New Year everyone, Today, I wanna talk about people who feel it's necessary to dumb themselves down.
For other people.
Individuals who feel it is necessary to dumb themselves down.
For other people.
You wanna dumb yourself down while you pump someone else up. It makes no sense. What that does is truly tell you what you think of yourself. But unfortunately, people don't have the mindset to graft step, especially in their relationships. They think that they're supposed to.
Do all of these things.
For the guy or the woman that they're with, to push them pump them up, but they get none of that in return.
People think it's the proper way to love.
People think the proper way to love is to let people be little and degrade them. It is not.
Everything you do.
That you shouldn't do, or that you should do and you don't tells you about yourself. It tells you what type of person you are, whether you believe it or not. It tells you so much important information about yourself.
But most people do not understand it.
They just think it's life, it's coincident, it's just the way it is. No everything you do or don't do, what you accept, what you allow, The choices and decisions you make tells you about who you are as a person. Whether you do it subtle you know subtle, whether you do it openly or whether you try to hide undercover and do it, it tells you about who you are.
Millions of people could grow if they were in tune with self, if they had the mindset to be aware and mindful of how they think, how they feel, how they act. But most people just mosey through life on autopilot, not paying attention to the things that they do. They don't pay attention to when they go through something, how they do not allow themselves to learn from their experiences. That's why most people in the world continue to be broken. I know the truth hurts, but I don't know nothing
else to give you other than the truth. It does not matter matter how bad the lives of people can be. Most people will not change because to most people, it's always the other person to blame. Always people are not being accountable and responsible for their own lives, so they go through life more concerned about the lives of other people, their significant others, and.
Other people trying to please and appease.
While their lives fall apart or while they remain stagnant. People get into relationships and they completely forget about self.
They forget about their ambition, their.
Goals, their dreams to try to push and pump up who they're with, only for there are a lot of people to end up being totally taken for granted, used, abused, and you name it because the other person gained what they're looking for and dump you to the curve or alienate you. But you wasted all the years, the time, the energy trying to pump up that individual or push that individual when they didn't really care about you the way you cared about them.
You have to be.
Cognizant of what you are doing, what you are allowing and accepting from other people. I don't care who they are. Any person will treat you exactly how you have taught them to treat you or a significant other. Whether it's your husband, your wife, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your child, your parents, your siblings, other relatives, friends and other people, they will treat you.
Exactly how you have taught them to treat you.
They will play the role you have put them in. You have allowed them to be in It's just.
Reality.
Now. I know a lot of people's realities are distorted, but the truth is always the truth, no matter how you look at it, it's always the truth.
Far too many people.
Go through life just acting clueless, just because they want to be a part of something.
And I think.
About, well, a few years ago, I even told you about a story about myself where I used to sing in this gospel group and when I was leading a song, I never really put into it what.
God gave me.
Because I didn't want the other person to think I was trying to steal the spotlight because.
The other person was the main leader, so.
I didn't give it my all, which shame on me.
For the other person.
But after I realized what I was doing, I asked for a forgiveness from God, because God gave me the talent.
And I should let my light shine like.
Anyone and everyone else. But I was much much much younger than and I know better now, but I've never experienced that in a relationship with a significant other. But a lot of people do go through it. A lot of people go through it on their jobs, putting people up on pedestals who don't belong. They're number one and number two who have nothing good for you. All they want is to use you for what they can get next.
You're their stepping stone.
Until people mature and no self love self.
They're gonna keep marching right into twenty twenty six.
That is now here, the very same carrying the same baggage, unhealed hearts and minds, insecurities, depression, anxiety, all kinds of things. People don't realize that a lot of your mental conditions come from the lifestyles.
That you lead.
Because the majority of people, and I've said this before, the majority of people who have mental health issues was not born that way. They developed them out of some type of experience and because of the lifestyles that they leave. When you show your vulnerability to your significant others and other people, you fail yourself. Because one thing for sure is.
People can see exactly for what you show them.
You show your vulnerabilities by how you let people treat you.
They know more about what you think of yourself than you.
So let me go back to what I'm the title or the subject at hand. When you dumb yourself down to pump someone else up, to push someone or whatever it may be, while you stay stagnant and not appreciate it and take it for granted. It tells you who you are as a person. It tells you that you have work to do within yourself. And I get it because again, at one point in my life, I did it. But I've always told you I learned from every experience.
And when I realized what I was doing, because I was looking at the way other people were receiving me and wanted me to be out front more, and I realized what I was doing to myself, and I stopped. I changed. I also left that group, but I've never allowed myself to be in that situation again. Because people will feed on your weaknesses period, because some individuals show how eager, willing.
And desperate they are to please and appease.
So when you do that, the people you're doing it for will feed off of you, zap your energy, your time, your resources.
Yes, it's true, without blinking an eye.
So the moral of this episode is you have to have faith in yourself. You must know yourself, you must love yourself, and you must be able to see when you are neglecting yourself for others.
You know, I talk.
About being selfish, being selfless, Well, when you neglect yourself. That's being selfish to yourself. When you are selfless to a point of distress, meaning you will do anything, in everything, you never say no, that's being selfish to yourself. Because when you don't know and love yourself and you don't take care of yourself, you.
Are the one who hurt the most.
You are the one who hurt the most, and some of you you become so angry, so mad, so sad, just full of hurt on top of the unresolved pain you already experienced. That's why people break down. When you feel that you gotta keep pumping someone else up. You gotta stop believing in yourself because you're exalting all of your energy, are exerting all of your energy into who you're with.
You're your own problem.
How many times have I told you that if a person and I don't care who the person is, if they don't enhance your life.
You need to rethink it.
Too many people get into relationships with individuals who do not enhance their lives. They do the complete opposite, and then you think the relationship is going to work when all you're doing.
Is struggling.
Every day, struggling, trying to maintain a relationship that has no foundation.
Have you ever seen a house without a foundation.
It's impossible, but many people are trying to make their relationships work with no foundation.
If you have to give up yourself.
To love, please, and appease someone else, baby, you've chosen wrong.
They chose right when they picked you, but you chose wrong because the other person don't care.
If they're out to get whatever they're trying to get, they don't care because they have a mission, they have an agenda. So when you dumb yourself down, or when you neglect yourself for who you're with, you're the one who's going to end up on the short end of the stick. Every single time. People will drain you completely dry. They will milk you completely dry if you allow it.
I've talked to so many people when I was providing counsel, and I've talked to so many people who gave up so much of themselves, of their dreams and goals for who they were with, only to be.
Treated like dogs.
Who they were with became doctors, lawyers, all of these prominent people, only to leave them in the dust. They no longer mattered because they got from them what they wanted.
I even know people who married.
Individuals in the military to take advantage of the benefits.
And once they obtained what they was trying to get, dump them.
That's why you you you you. You must be aware of what's going on.
In your relationships.
You must be aware of what's going on around you, on your jobs, wherever you go, you must be aware of what's going on because when you act as if you don't know, people take advantage. People take advantage period People hold themselves back so much in order to push their significant others, and a lot of people never go back, never go back to complete their dreams and their goals and their ambitions.
It's sad. It's very sad.
Because if you're with someone, you shouldn't have to give up your dreams, your goals, your ambitions to support someone else. You can still support the other person and still maintain your own goals, dreams, and ambitions. If you don't know how, that tells you something about yourself. Some people get married and their spouses don't want them to work, and you just go along with it. Most times it's because people
don't want to work anyways. But when you don't have your own when you're not making your own money, it becomes a problem for you eventually.
When you don't have your own it means you are.
Now an individual who have to depend on someone else. That's not good, especially when the person you're depending on is not a good person, have no good intentions. Really, it poses a problem in your life eventually.
Some people have signs of red.
Flags right away, but they ignore them because they want who they want.
They allow their desires.
Their wants, their emotions, their feelings, what their eyes see to trump what's right in their face. It's something that people really don't understand that's happening in their relationships or in their lives because they don't have eyes to see. That mindset has crippled and statnated many many.
People around the globe. So it's a new day.
New year, which means a new chance to become the best you possible for yourself, not for anyone else, for yourself. Because when you do, I promise you your eyes will open. You would think, feel and act differently. People around you may not like it, but they don't have to stop feeding into people who are not feeding into you, pouring into people who are not pouring into you. Breathing life into people who's suffocating you, straining the life out of you.
It's time to wake up. You can't be the best that you can be by making everything and everyone else more important than yourself, because all that does is keep you where you've always been, stagnant and stuck.
So going forth, it's time for healing.
It's time for you to allow inner healing in your life. It's time to forgive and move on, because forgiveness is for you.
It will take.
Forgiveness for you to grow and to mature. I hope you get it. I hope you understand. I hope you receive it. I'm leaving it right there. Happy New Year, Thank you for listening.
Much more.
To each and every one of you. I pray you are prosperous, blessed.
New Year.
Change starts with only you. Please share this episode. I end all episodes the same, and I hope and I pray you do it.
Think on it.