Episode 616 Choosing Against Your Own Best Interest

Hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm bad with something for you to think about. Okay, here's another one, stepping on toes. Someone is not gonna like it, but you'll be okay. You always do, you will be okay. I wanna talk about the relationships you choose to get in. People get into relationships based on the mindsets that they have. Now, I'm almost finished revising my book, and when I do, I will tell you the title of my book. But

A lot of people get into relationships. They call it polygamy.

They get into these polygamous relationships and you cannot tell them that they are not mature people. You just can't tell them. You can't tell them that they don't love themselves. They don't want to hear it. They think they love themselves. They think they.

Are mature, but I'm telling you you're not.

People who are in polygamous relationships they don't know what love is. They know what feeling good is, but they don't know what love is because they don't love themselves. You got a bunch of women with one man. They're committed to him and can't be with anyone else, but he could be with other women. How is that?

Please?

Somebody, make it make sense? And they're okay with it. At least that's what they say. He don't love them. Wait, hold on, hold on, let me go back. He loved them, he could possibly love them, but he's not in love with none of them. Because when you are in love with someone, you're not trying to share them. You're not trying to share them. Now. You can love this one, that one, the one back there, the one over there, but you're not in love with none of them because you would not want to share.

You just would it.

But they think it's love and all of that, but real love is nowhere in that equation. And it's the same for people who choose to be in relationship with individuals who abuses them, talk to them any kind of way, you know, but live to and degrade them and the way they speak to them. If you go through that when you're dating that person, you think it's gonna change when you marry him or see. That's when people get it all mixed up. They think the person is going

They don't get better, they become worse.

It's like people who choose to get into relationship for people that they know have a history of cheating. You think they fall so in love with you that they won't cheat on you. They probably cheating on you already before you ever choose to marry them. These are the things people get themselves into, seeing these poligamous relationships.

Everybody getting the peace of the pie.

Everybody is getting something from the relationship. Everybody has voids that they're trying to fill.

And guess what. You can be a man with ten women or a woman with ten men.

None of them will fill the voids in you.

You have to do that for yourself. They can make you.

Feel good, but they will not heal the unhealed inside of you. Some men think they need multiple women, No, you just need the right one. Some women think they need multiple men. No, she just need the right one. And you will never experience that as a human being, as long as you are a person who have unresolved in her issues.

So you can think, oh, everything is great, I'm just loving it.

You are there.

Of course you are enjoying it. You're loving it.

You're getting your pie in your cake and your ice cream too.

Of course you are enjoying it.

It's great, but you're still not fulfilled because you're trying to get it from multiple people. They will never be able to feel the voids in you, whether it's a woman with multiple men or a man with multiple they will never be able to fulfill that boy to feel that void in you. They will never be able to

You don't love yourself.

And it goes for any relationship, not just polygamous. It goes to any relationship because honestly, most people who.

Are in relationships married and not married. Most people are unhappy.

Most people are they're unhappy, they're unfulfilled.

So some people think they need multiple partners.

To be felled. You know, those voids feel No, they don't feel the voids. They just make you feel good. And it's the same in any relationship. People are trying to feel their emptiness inside. That's why people are in relationships married and none married, and they're so lonely. They're so lone because that person can't heal what's inside of you. They can't fill those voids. That's why you're in a

That's why you need your ownly.

When you get into a relationship and you have nothing to bring to the table, that person has the ability to control you because you have to offer but yourself, your body. You're bringing nothing to the table of substance. And that's why so many people are treating badly because they accept these types of relationships and then their control and use the taking advantage of but every bit of it goes back to who you are as a person.

Themselves, for their own lives.

See, because once that mindset changes, your entire life change.

It's like a metamorphois take place. You're no longer who you used to be.

You don't think like you used to think. You don't let people do to you what they used to do to you, what you used to allow. You don't go alone to get a loan to be lone. No, when you love yourself and you know yourself, healing has taken place.

You cannot be a person of a hearted mind.

You cannot be a person of that caliber until healing has taken place. You cannot be a person of mental maturity until heal has taken place. You learn something that allowed you to grow and mature. Some people go to the school of hard knocks and never ever graduate. Let's just keep repeating the same cycles, going through total nonsense, total bullcrap, because that's what they subject themselves to.

Over and over.

Relationship happen, jumping from one relationship to another.

Thinking that it's gonna make you feel good.

Sure, anytime it's something new, it makes you feel good until it gets old. Then you're right in the same mindset that you've always been See people so good, I mean, they are professionals at faking and attending professionals.

They need to give out Grammys and enemies.

To most other people in the world because they're so good at faking and pretending.

After this, if everything is okay when they know it's not.

That does nothing but keep you in the same mindset you've always been in.

And I will say.

Again, most people go through life pouring into other people, but not into self. You're trying to push that person, appease that person, please that person, but you're doing nothing for self growth and development. And that's why you keep choosing wrong You keep allowing the wrong things, You keep getting into relationships.

The wrong way because you don't know who you are, you haven't figured you out, you don't love yourself.

And I don't know how many ways I can say it but I continue to try and just keep praying that people get it. No one is gonna change you but you. No one is gonna complete you but yourself. No one can do the inside work that you must do.

No one, no one can do it for you. People keep thinking and.

Believing that other individuals can heal them, can save them, can fix them, can change them.

They can't.

They can influence you to change, but you still have to be the one who allow change in your life. A change mindset is a change life.

No significant other, none is able to give you that. No one. You have to do it for yourself.

It has to come from within you. You know, people go through life and they alter their faces, they alter their bodies, they alter I mean everything. But let me tell you, it's not gonna make him love you anymore.

It's not gonna make her love you anymore.

You may have the biggest booty, he's still gonna treat you like trash. They may even look at the booty and think it's cute or they may not, but that booty is not going to change how they treat you.

They still if they treat you bad, they gonna treat you bad.

With the big booty or big booze or long hair or whatever it is, they're still going to treat you bad. See, people got it just all misconstrued in life. They think, oh, if I alter my face, if I do this, if I do that, people will accept me. People will I can I can do more things. I can do this and I can do No. It's a clear, clear, clear sign you have some unhealed things inside of you to alter your face and your body. There's no you don't

No you don't.

No, you don't. There's no way.

You look it in the mirror and not able to recognize yourself and you love that. No, no, no, no, no, no, no way. You can fake it. You can pretend all you want to. You know you're lying, you're lying. But so many people go through these things because society says this and that is beautiful. When society is full of broken people, that's who makes up society.

And you're believe in it. Oh you gotta have this, you gotta have that.

You got have to dress this way, you have to look this, you know, this way or that way. And people doing it just I mean just doing it, doing it, doing it, doing it because they don't think for themselves. They have low esteem, no confidence, lack love, self love, so they believe these things and then they feel worse about themselves.

Now you have a big old budget, can't even take care of.

You, got big boobs, You're uncomfortable.

I mean, it's just uh. And you're still treated.

Bad by men and women because men get a whole lot of altering done as well. You gotta learn to love you. You have to learn to love you if a must, because you'll be on a rack.

Race.

I mean, just constant, constant chasing after something. You have to be satisfied within your own soul. No one can do that.

For you, no one.

And that's just fact. No one has to like what I'm saying. But I'm telling you the truth.

So whatever you get into and whoever you get into it with, let me tell you, you're gonna get exactly and more what you open yourself up to and what you've allowed. It may look good, but it won't be good for you, and it won't eventually it won't feel good.

People always end up regarding their decisions, and.

Unfortunately, some people don't even get a chance to do that because they die in their bad choices and decisions.

No one can give you what you need other than God and yourself. That's it. No one can give you what you.

Need but God in yourself. And so many people look over both and think they're gonna have peace. Never gonna happen, never gonna happen. Until you allow inner healing to take place, you will remain the same.

You will continue to go through annecessary prap. You will go alone, You will let people think for you. You'll believe anything you easily manipulated.

You always pray or predator until you allow healing to take place. Until you become a better person, mentally mature, self love, believe it in yourself else some people do wrong for so long they think it's right, and that's sad. You can keep ignoring yourself and pouring into everybody else, but you will always feel the same because no change has taken place. And that's all I'm saying. I'm living right there. I hope you get something out of it.

Thank card, it