S1E4: Skin

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All clear on level one. Moving to the second floor. Did you copy that, Penny? Oh, sorry, Marcus. Radio discipline, Penny. Pay attention. Sorry! I mean, uh, copy that. Hi, Marcus. I was just... feeding Gertrude. The goddamn lizard? She's an Aki monitor. I don't care. That thing is smelling up the place. I'm sorry. I'll... I'll clean up better. Ugh, seriously, what have you been feeding that thing? Uh, crickets, mostly. Crickets. And that probably explains the infestation. Oh, I don't, well...

I mean, maybe some got out when I was feeding her? I don't know. Ugh! No wonder Sandra stopped chewing up for his shifts. I've had it with this biohazard you're keeping. This is a museum, not a zoo! Sorry. Please don't fire me. I need this job. Then act like it. Get rid of the lizard, clean up this mess, and maybe we can... Feel like god my skin I having a reaction to that thing that He doesn't like mean people, Marcus. What is he doing? Stay back!

I mean, the only noteworthy thing in his apartment is a closet full of suits. Just keep at it. His CRT should have everything you need. Okay. Uh... Oh, shit. Oh, no, what? He has a flat screen. No, no, CRT. It stands for Curtain Issued Records Terminal. It's basically a tablet where we maintain our files for work. Got it. But don't you guys have a handbook or something? Eh, I mean, Heady made one, but...

That wouldn't help you get into character. I mean, the tablet will have everything. Aberration records, staff dossier, all of his personal notes. You need to learn as much as you can if you want to stay off the radar. So your top secret agency gives you all tablets with sensitive data? Yeah. What if one gets stolen? The biometric system wouldn't let them pass the login screen and too much tampering would wipe the hard drive. Wait, how does that even work? That's a Lucas question.

But I do know it's linked to the user's DNA, and if it doesn't match, you won't get it. Oh, then I'm screwed. Cool. Awesome. Maybe not. Whether you being his identical twin is close enough, I guess we'll find out. If I can find it. Wait. Wait, I think I got it. Taped under a drawer. Seems a little paranoid. That's Jordan for you. Was Jordan. Anyway, do you see a thumb scanner?

Yeah. Trying it now. Hang on. Val's calling. I'm gonna put you on hold. Alright. Here it goes. Come on. Come on. God, this thing is... Ancient. Oh, yes. All right, hey, you still there? I'm in, baby. Oh, good, but that needs to wait. We've got a case. Right now? Yeah, right now. We're coming to pick you up.

All right, Val. What's the rundown? Petty flag the disappearances. Three missing persons reported in the last month. All connected to the same location. One customer, an elderly guy named Frank, never made it home. The other two are museum staff. Sandra Mackey, part-time curator, and most recent is Marcus Fields, their head of security. Could be normal staff turnover. Museums don't usually pay living wages, from what I hear.

I don't mean they didn't show up for work. I mean, gone, gone. Abandoned homes, cars left in the parking lot, no contact with family or friends. Uh, what's the name of this place again? It's called... The Hoaxatorium. The fuck? Okay. Here it is. A Museum of Historical Impersonation. where we celebrate humanity's greatest historical hoaxes and the people who fell for them. Sounds... Yeah, sounds like it sounds. So, what makes Hedy think this is our kind of case? Well, the police reports are real.

Timeline checks out, and... And honestly, I don't have anything else going on today. And I'm bored. Okay. Not quite the answer I was hoping for, but... Sure. Alright. Well... Parking lot's mostly empty. That's a good sign. I hate crowds. All right. So we'll go in as tourists, look around, ask some questions. If we see anything weird, regroup and decide our next steps.

Oh, and remember, this could have a mundane explanation. We don't work missing persons or homicides without ever an activity, so just don't get your hopes up, I guess. You know what? I'm calling it. Haunted Museum. This place already looks cursed as shit.

It's just... It's just a little rundown. Hello? Anyone here? Museum people! Oh, um, hi! Uh, I mean... Welcome to the Hawksatorium. Hawks? I don't think that's right. How can I help you? Well, we were driving through the area and we thought, oh, well, we'd like to see your exhibits, right? How much are tickets? Okay. I guess that's fine. Admission is $5 each. Okay, that's... Cash only. Oh. Exact change, um, preferred. Sure, just, uh...

One second. I've got a five. I have some ones. Some change. I have four dollars in ones. 35 to 17. Do you think this Canadian dollar counts? I have 68 cents. Oh, Christ. Here's a 20. Oh, but I can't break a 20. Maybe I didn't speak loud enough. Exact change is... You can keep the five if that means that we can get the show on the road. Okay. I'm sorry. The manager emptied the cash box and never... Uh... Anyway... Here are your tickets.

My name is Penny. Would you like a tour? So, um, we have a bunch of fake stuff. This is the Shakespearean toothbrush. People thought it was Shakespeare's toothbrush, but it wasn't. Cool. Cool, cool. You, uh, got a lot of bugs in here. Yeah. Sorry, crickets. As long as it's not mosquitoes. Uh, what happened here? Sorry, there was... In accident, someone tripped into the exhibit and broke the glass. It was the, uh, Rosetta fragment.

People thought it was part of the Rosetta Stone, but it was actually... a burnt oat cake? That's... that's stupid. I guess people believe anything, right? Yeah. Yeah. Um, this is the... This is the... Mona Lizard. It's supposed to be Leonardo da Vinci's sketch of the Mona Lisa, but with a lizard head. But it's not? This is just some French guy in the 1800s trying to be funny. Which honestly makes more sense, because why would Da Vinci draw a lizard lady? I mean, not that lizards aren't...

cool. I think they're really cool. I even have an ACU monitor. Her name is Gertrude. I keep her in the security office so she's not neglected during working hours. But yeah. I just think it's weird for the Mona Lisa. Sorry, I'm really nervous. Marcus used to do the tours, but he's... Not here anymore. It's fine. You're doing great. Oh, thanks. You're nice. This way.

Must have just cleaned here. Yeah, sorry. There was some, um, spillage. Had to use a lot of disinfectant. Anyway, these are... coffins of sakura there's like 13 of them and they're all fake just in different ways i'm gonna regret asking this but what do you mean in different ways um Four are replicas for rich people's houses. Three are from a stage show. And the rest are just...

A mix of real and fake stuff that nobody kept track of properly. Huh. Uh, okay. Hmm. I... I should probably vacuum up more of those crickets. Marcus always got really mad about them. You mentioned Marcus. He isn't here anymore? Yeah. He just quit, along with Sandra. It's just me now. Sounds like a lot of work for you. Anyway, uh, that's most of the tour. Oh, we'd love to see the rest, if you don't mind, of course. Actually, where's the bathroom? Oh, uh, down that hallway and then take...

A left, then a right. No, wait, wait. Take a right, then a left. Come on, King. What? I don't have to go. Yes, you do. Let's go. Don't wait for us. Y'all keep the tour going. Are you sure?

So very sure. So what can you tell me about the Chimera exhibit? Because I'm looking and it looks like two dogs fused together. And that's just like a dog. What are you doing? I don't need to use the bathroom. Oh, my God. Can't get your head in the game. This door is getting us nowhere. We need to look around. Oh. Oh. Clues. Right. Sorry. Sure. Clues. In here. Val, do you work here? That's employees only. I can read.

Hey, Gertrude. Whoa. That thing is shedding like crazy. This habitat really needs a cleaning. This old office needs a cleaning. What's this? Oh my god! What? The drawer. There. Look. Is this scan? Don't touch it. Just... Don't touch it. I'm gonna touch it. Huh. Well, I'll be. A whole fucking person's skin. Like a human jumpsuit. With a hood. Please don't call it that.

There's another one. This one's more like a crop top. What's your deal? Just give me a sec. Skin in the desk. Skin in the lizard tank. What do you want to bet? Yep, human skin. They've been feeding it human skin. That's awesome. Penny! Penny, we were just... What are you doing in here? This is employees only! Uh-huh. Care to explain this? Oh! You found... It's... It's part of an exhibit? We're working on a display about... about, uh... stuff. Look, this area is restricted.

You need to go back to the tour. Penny, if something's wrong, I can just... Everything's wrong. Everything's fine. You just... Don't fucking touch me. I'm walking. Sorry. Just stay in the main gallery. Please. What happened? Full human pelts. Human pelts? And there's way too much shed skin in the terrarium. I think they've been feeding the skin to their lizard. Alright, just show me. Can't. They locked it. Unless...

You want me to kick it in? No, no, thank you, though. Did you notice the coffins? Coffins? During the tour? No. I didn't want to blow her cover, but one of them was leaking something. Here. That's blood. Bloody coffin.

Love it. What a great day. Thank you. Thank you for inviting me. I love this. You ready? On three. One. Bruh. I thought that was going to be a lot heavier. Guys? I'm betting the skin you found goes on this body. Should we... try and put it back on? Just be sure. So... So now what? Now, we go ask Penny some serious questions. Val, I don't see any aberrant activity, though. I mean, for all we know, this is a freaky, but mundane, murder situation.

We need to just call it in and let the normal authorities handle this. You guys hear that, right? Yeah. Me too. What the hell is that thing? Is that... one of the victims? There's no way. It's like seven feet tall. Seven feet of dead weight! Val, let's just... Think about this. Uh, Val, the wounds are closing. The itching is getting worse! Fine. Let's see if I can... Go back ahead. I ain't scared of you. You must be a motherfucker. What's wrong? I don't know. It didn't touch me.

Just take my jacket! Stop the bleeding! Did you just... slap it? It startled me! Wait. The itching stopped. Do it again. Okay. Okay. It's working. Slapping is its weakness. Its weakness is skin, Cain. Skin, not... What? Let's get it. All together now. No! Don't hurt my friend! Fuck! Why? That's enough! You! You're the mean one! You! Why did you do that? I hear you. Don. Nighty night. I... I can't see. You need to get it. Fuck it.

Group hug? Yeah, group hug. Keep holding it! Of course keep holding it! Get your face all up in it! What is it? Let me make sure. Val, do you have to, though? Now I'm weirdly grateful I can't see. Fuck, this hurts. Someone get me some water, please. No, water makes it worse. Cain, just... blink a lot and don't touch your eyes. I think we have eyewash in the car. What do we do about them? I mean, that's kind of above our pay grade. I'll call in processing.

Okay. Processing will have some questions. Ignatius will handle the cleanup. Right. How's the hand? It hurts. Oh, the eyes. Uh, it hurts. At least I can see again. I don't get it. They thought that thing was their friend. Friend or not, it killed three people. Let me take the lead. Status report. Aberrant threat neutralized. One complicit civilian requiring processing. Nature of complicity.

Direct contact with the aberration. Destruction of evidence. Attempted to facilitate our deaths. Their name's Penny. They're in the backseat. Roger that. We'll take it from here. Who are you? What's happening? It's okay. You're safe now. My head hurts. I'm sorry to hear that. We'll have someone take a look and make sure you're okay. Uh, okay? But, um, am I being arrested? Oh, no, Denny.

We just need to understand what happened here. Right this way. We'll take you somewhere more comfortable so we can talk. But what about Gertrude? I can't leave Gertrude alone. It's okay. We already have someone looking after Gertrude. Oh, okay. That's nice of you. But, um, could I just take her with me? i'm afraid not penny but i promise you you can see gertrude after you answer our questions okay okay this way please

Okay, thank you. Who's Gertrude? Pet lizard. Oh, wow. Your report is due in 24 hours. It'll be ready. What about Gertrude? What about Gertrude? I mean, we aren't just gonna leave her here, right? I'll message Ignatius. They basically run a zoo with all the abandoned pets they collect. Okay. Good. All right.

Case closed. Let's get the hell out of here. Hey, you did good today. But... You should really spend some time with Jordan's tablet. Get familiar with his... perspective on things his perspective it's just that i can tell val notices you're acting different i can cover for you for a while but not forever you need to get into character Got it. I will. You boys coming? I want to get dinner. Val, your hands are wrecking. You have blood in your hair. All right. Now let's get it to go.

Thank you for listening to another episode of Redacted. Starring Jamie Petronas as Jacob Kane, Athan as Eli Reyes, Kirsten Rhea as Joe Valentine, Tal Minear as Penny, Natalie Light as aging Pushka, Michael Fremantle as Marcus, and Landon Wisnant as the skinless guy, the monster, he's the monster. If you're enjoying the show, consider giving it five stars. Additionally, you can visit patreon.com forward slash the redacted unit for more info.

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