Rapper T.I. and His Wife Tiny Set The Record Straight

comments for the first time. Hi, what's going on? You know, what's up? What's up? Broc? Welcome? Well, I just found out of what ninety degrees today? All right, I'm gonna let you all guys wanted to say hi, so you're not gonna do when another king and queens show up at the house. You're know, I was hoping to be greeted and honored properly. Yeah, I mean I was hoping to set some of these opinions on you. Yea. I

was like Tip coming to the Red Table. I was like, I'm gonna say hi, but Junker tell him I keep the covering. So let me ask you this, Tip, what the hell is going on now? If I may say, in my defense, if I may say in my defense now and I came here for the tough stuff. No

easy ride for me. Baby. Well then you know what, Let's just start with what's in the headlines right now, and then this himing gate the uproar all started after t I gave an interview on parenting, specifically about his eighteen year old daughter Deja, whose mother is singer Miss Nico. So have you had the sex talk with your daughters? Not only have we had a conversation, we have yearly

trips to the Ganna collegist to check her height. From Gloria Steinham to planned Parenthood, the backlash was immediate and huge. Founder of the Me Too movement to Ronald Berg had this to say, that opens up this can of worms that I don't think that he really was prepared to open up. Or we're talking about this long tradition of checking the purity of women's bodies. And I think that a lot of men have this idea that being a good father is protecting your daughter's virginity. But it's so

problematic in so many ways. It's just it lends itself to this notion that men own their daughters. Author and professor of sociology at Georgetown University, Michael Eric Dyson shares his opinion being a father, a black father in particular, is not the easiest thing in the world. And a guy like t I believed that the predatory behavior of other men who are like you when you were younger, the guys you knew were doing dirt, must be protected against.

But let's be honest, t I was attempting to exercise control, leverage his authority as a patriarch on his daughter in terms of protecting her. But there's a difference between control and education. If she got pregnant, people would say, how did you let your daughter get pregnant so early? And it would look like a failing on his part. But the answer to that is not policing your daughter's body. So I would love to understand better what he really thinks about this. I just want to give you a

moment to say what you feel like you'd like to say. Firstally, I came to clip any misconceptions that have been surrounding how we interact and parent and what is appropriate and inappropriate. I think all of this surrounds a conversation that I was having in a very joking manner when asked how do I deal with parenting in this day and age? And so I just began to, you know, from a

place of truth. I began to embellish and exaggerate. And I think that a lot of people kind of like ticket extremely literal because if you put any of my reputation, like who I am as a father, who I've been, I honestly thought people knew me better than that. Well, there's some of us that know you, but there's a lot but they don't. Do you understand the sensitivity of really I did not. Do you understand it now? I understand it now, Yes, I do. Absolutely. However, my intentions

I think have been terribly misconstrued and misconceived. Let me go set this recordstrate. I never said I was in any exam room. That is an assumption, That is a false tya. I never said that it was being done present day as an eighteen year old six years old at the time. And I never said that her mother wasn't present. Yeah, I'm mom was present every time. You know, he was just you know, most fathers don't go, but he was just present and he didn't make the adopt disappointment.

It's already you know, appointment and all of these things, all of the this narrative, this false narrative, has just been sensationalized. So at the time, her mother welcomed your presence, and your daughter did too, absolutely, and that was never

any objection. She did have a problem with me talking about it, however, and I understand that, and I am incredibly apologetic to her for that, to her, to you, sweet baby Daja, not to any of these other strangers and any of these weirdos who you know, just kind of toss lies around for fun. Yeah, she understands my intentions, and she knows who I am, she knows who I've always been, and I think that that allows a certain level of understanding. I mean, it's just the outside. The

noise is it's distracting, it is confusing and hurtful. It is it's hurtful and embarrassing. She was horrified. Well, I definitely understood why she would be, you know, feel like, you know, it was personal to her. Dass a quiet. She doesn't talk a lot. She doesn't you know, you know, you have to nudge things out of her right because we as women understand how especially for a young girl, how delicate and what it exposes about her very private,

especially to intimate life. Yeah, I don't. I didn't. I didn't get it. I was oblivious to it. However I am now sensitive to it for her. Yeah, for her. And then all of a sudden, when when when the number two hit the fan, and I hadn't addressed it, you know, at her request, I was taking the bullets, and that's not I don't have a problem with that. I'm finding the fire. Finding the fire, no problem with that. My daughter said, just let it go, don't say nothing,

just let it go. And I didn't until I had different directors. Okay, go ahead, make a stop. Clear it up. You know what I'm saying. And I would not be here today had I not had those different directors, I'd still be sitting in silence. I want to learn from you.

I have three powerful, independent, brilliant women, and I want to know what is the purpose and place of a father in this society, Because a father like myself who wants to be as involved and as attentive as possible, we could draw the conclusion of we just donate sperm and come pay for things, and we don't really have no say so in high things that's not true. I don't think that's the case at all, And I don't think anybody has a problem with you being involved in that.

I think it was more like, that's so so very personal. I don't think anybody has a problem with you protecting a daughter. No, that's not the issue of you and having been a young girl myself, having raised several young women and realizing that a woman's journey in regards to her sexuality has to be guided right mostly I think by mother's that's just me personally, okay, but mother and truly understanding what that journey is, takes her daughter's hand

and walks her through. That's how I work that out with Will. There's just certain things about raising a man that I can't know. I would tell him, love your daughter, let me teach her, because there's certain sensitivities that you might not understand and have just because of your relationship

in the world is different than a woman's relationship. Like I knew when you talked about it, because I live with a man it loves his daughter, right, you know, in the conversations I've had to have with him in regards to what is protecting her, what is educating her, what is actually allowing her to self actualize as her own individual self versus control? Right, So, when I heard what happened, I said, I know what he's trying to say.

He's like, I'm present. I'm present in a way that anything that she needs, any kind of trouble, I feel like she might be in I'm right here. I got it. I got it. I totally understood that. But at the same time, especially when we're dealing with these kind of sensitive issues, knowing the extent of that protection, the idea that people thought you were trying to control your daughter's

virginity versus no, because that's very different question ask it. Okay, first of all, the world, control is very but you know that's what it sounds like. No, but in order to guide or direct, you must have a certain level of control of anything. Okay, So so, so how do you want us to understand your level of control on

what you were speaking of? Well, I think that in the age or the time where our women, black women are the most unprotected and disregarded women on the planet, I'm being criticized because I'm willing to go above and beyond to protect mine and I'm talking about all of the little slimmy, grimmy, chepy fingered little boys who want to just come in, defile and destroy the sanctity that I have. Amen, Listen, I'm just saying, right, I don't understand anything. That is the most important thing to me

in my life. I am going to deal with that with very extreme care, and I don't understand how that is looked at. Its being so wrong in order to control. For that to be mallest, there must be ill intent. If I'm going to the doctor with you just for the sake of controlling you, that okay. But if I'm going for the purpose of being a protective parent, and there's no thing there's no such thing as overprotective. That's

protected and unprotected. But what's what's important to you? Though, because I don't think it's so much about virginity as much or was it well to me, I am here to protect all of the children from themselves until they make it to a point where they have awareness, a sense of self and discernment to be able to make certain decisions on their own that will impact their lives indefinitely.

So you felt as though, when she's fifteen, sixteen years old, that she might not have the understanding of what it means to engage in absolutely since you turned eighteen, Like I don't have control of anything, and don't you you don't you know what I mean? Run fly, be yourself now getting her there, especially in a day where there's so much input, so many other perspectives thrown at children, like you know, from YouTube to Instagram, like the concept

of love, beauty, life, sex, all of those things. Those lines are being blurred every second, so there has to be someone there to clarify what is acceptable what is unacceptable. I trust and believe that I put moral standards, principles and greatness and all of my children. But until they learn how to unlock it and use those powers for themselves,

that has to be harnessed. When I think about the girls that I've raised, I was never really trying to protect their virginia versus making sure that they had a level of understanding and maturity before going into certain things. But it was never about well out of virgin It's not protecting. I'm not there to protect necessarily virginity. I

just know that is a big move. Right now. You make that move, Okay, there are things that happened that follow you have to be equipped, and I don't know if you're equipped or I don't know, like I have to. Awareness is my first line of defense, right, So that's different. Okay I don't know how, but okay, that's education. You only have but so much control. Right So I have been vocal about what to expect or not to expect,

foolishly of young men. You know, as she begin ends to engage and socialize, just hey, man, listening, keep your expectations low. You can't get your feelings wrapped up in this. Now. This is this is a physical urge, this animalistic urge is taking over right here. This is not an emotional romantic encounter for this gentleman. Don't think it is. Do you think that's the part you were trying to protect

her from? Yes, because if you are, if you aren't feel like young boys that age, would not be able to care for defile and distract, care for your daughter emotionally and the way in which you think she deserves. And that's what it was about. I mean, definitely all of the above. She definitely should be free for what could potentially come from, you know, doing the duke. You

know what I mean? The dangers of pregnancy, the dangers of diseases, the dangers of you know, just having your heart broken, thrown away and discarded, not to be forgotten. Let's say that you went to the darkness appointment that first of all, we all know that hymans can be broken by riding a horse. It can be like it's like, and you could be very sexually active in your hyman. Be intact that that is. These are all things that that you are learning as a man, and I'm looking

to you guys to educate. Well, let me ask you another question. Man. Let's say that you found out that she at fifteen or sixteen years old wasn't a virgin. What would you have done that? Your childhood is when you lose your virginity. That's it that you now you ended your childhood and it's time to begin adulthood. And I can't let you run around trying to enjoy the luxuries of adulthood without any of the responsibilities of adulthood. But when you say your childhood and who you mean like,

you must heighten the level of responsibility. That could be birth control, it could be financial or just having a plan. You can't just run around not nor what you want to do no more. You can't just run around like, oh I figured out later. No, now you've made a decision that you want to be an adult. Now you need to have a plan together. You need to because if you figured this out, you need to have all this figured that too, right, But I need to just

say this though. I still feel like it would have been different if it was your son versus your daughter, right, And I always think it's so interesting and how men treasure their daughter's virginity but not their sons. I I kind of made the comparison of a son versus a daughter. If my son goes out and gets a girl pregnant, how is the household changed for those nine months? The household does not necessarily change those nine months, whereas if

my daughter come home, my household has changed immediately. So the stakes are highed. We were raised to provide and protect. I don't recall having much of a childhood besides figuring ways to get my mama to get over you know what I'm saying. So I think that if there is any more to be taught, it has to come in the form of philosophy, not punish me. Absolutely, you just brought up something that I think is very interesting, the

conditioning that comes with being a father. We all have been conditioned in a way to exactly and I think that in this very sensitive time when we have all this social media and social justice issues around um, the female body. This is the thing about the female body. I think the conversation is different when it comes to mom than when it comes to dad. You see, very different, you know it, and I don't understand it. I mean because the same thing we're talking about, just like you said,

the virginity of my daughter versus the virginity of my son. Okay, so it's the same conversation around mom versus dad. Because mom can tell daughter not to cut her hair, not the perman hair, not to color her hair, uh, not to get pearsons or whatever, but she can give her body away to anybody she wants to do without Pop saying anything. Well, here's the thing, though, this is what you have to understand. Though. It's a patriarchal structure that is not all. Yes, I heard the term before. I

didn't know that term was the thing patriarch with. Well, it's like it is structured by the views and the outlook of men. Okay, and it tends to be at times often oppressive to the feminine journey. Okay, has the fit has had females actually tried to explain absolutely, that's why you have feminists. That's why you have womanists, because I think the feminists. Sometimes it can be misconstrued by people who don't understand it as women wanting men to

stop silencing them so they could silence men. Well, it's not that. There's a lot that happens since the feminine feminine journey, right, it's often told or seen and left through the eyes of men who know nothing about women and what we're going through. Boom. That's the point because I felt like, even when I heard what happened, I said, oh, he doesn't understand the level. He found out how serious it was and how personal it was after he said it,

because you know, you know, he didn't think about that. Yeah, And I understood that just because I'm in this house, will he be saying the craziest stuff. He don't understand the level. And thank god he has me and he's got Willow, so we educate that joke before he leaves this house. You know what I mean. He's one of those that likes to tell stories and he's like, John's goes too far. Willow has gone at her dad several times for very insensitive comments, whether it's around menstruation or

you know, like you must be pe a message. She's like that, right there, we're not gonna do that, right. I don't see the problem with that. I do see the problem, but I just I understand that I don't understand see what we are landing. See, this is the point right here where we are man see every days working progress. What I appreciate about this moment and what I appreciate about you is understanding that this is a teachable moment. And also I think that it's great for

me to have this opportunity. And I think that all things happen in life for a reason. You know, every lesson has a purpose and it must be dealt with different but out of care and out of concern, not out of control and out of education. I don't think that our community, I culture, our generation can be pushed forward by having comfortable, convenient discussions. We have to have tough discussions in order to move forward. Right. And I knew when I heard it, Huh, I said, there's a

big misunderstand I misunderstand and I knew that first. You for that, and that's why I wouldn't come anywhere to speak about this, because I know most people just use it as a platform for themselves. And I understood why people misunderstood you. So sorry, Willow can make you well, you know what, I think he might be happy in the long run. So let me ask you this. Hold it. We're not done yet. I never ever ever had sex with anyone while we've been married. I have never ever

ever lied about this. Tell you what talking part two of our conversation with t I and Tiny. They have been through it. I see the emotion in your eyes from prison. So when I got back everything the world was upside down to the brink of divorce. This conversation, this problem, is the exact same thing will and I had to work through. Next Red Table Talking a r

t T family. Join our Red Table Talk group on Facebook to become part of the conversation, and be sure to follow the show page to catch up on all our episodes. All right, now, I'm here with my favorite couple in the gang ties and Times. We're gonna talk about how they have survived and made their marriage strong. And yeah, we gotta talk about that other thing. Swipe up to join the red table Talk family and become a part of the conversation. Follow us at facebook dot

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