Let's Talk About SEX!

not gonna have Willow on this show? Yes, I am my. That's the whole point. I did not want Willow to have shame of any kind. She needs to be at that table to hear it all. Good, Lord, have mercy. You're trying to kill me here. You know, when you can talk to your mother, who's been through a whole lot in regards to sex. I wouldn't say I'm acconnas or, but I'm forty seven. So enough said. So you're good. I'm going to prey on it. God help us all.

Let's rule and c and let's cur back. Please, nicky, guys, we're at the table, and today we're at the Red Table to talk about sex always, so tapn right, People like, oh do you think that's appropriate for will I'm like, hell, yeah, it's appropriate. Is it life? Yeah? Is it life? Then? Yeah? I have to sit up here and tell her how she has to be careful in these streets because of all the harms that may come to her because she's

I'm damn sure not leaving out the good stuff. And I feel like a lot of people make that mistake of only telling their girls it's scary out there, absolutely and that you better be Sack follows you throughout your entire life. I want to just take a minute to just explain to everybody that to Lana is one of Willows very actually my best friend. Do you guys talk openly about sex? Willow? Do we get a little too open sometime? A little questions text each other? Like you

know what hairstyles for your vagina? Do you enjoy that? That was the latest one vagina hairstyle? You can get creative with vagina hairstylesh my goodness, yeah me, Did you talk about like with your friends? No, I'm trying to think I don't think I talked to my friends openly about sex like that. Why do you think that is? We just didn't have all the information, you guys have Like, I know that a lot of young boys and young

girls are learning about sex to pornography online on social media? Right, was that not your introduction to sex? My introduction to sex was obviously walking in on you and Daddy. That was the first introduction. When the hell did you walk in all else? It was in Utah that one. No, not Utah Aspen. I think it was an Aspen. I was going downstairs to get some juice and I saw for a little moment and I ran away. I was like, oh my god, this is so crazy what I just see.

And then remember it wasn't like I was seeing everything. It was the room. It was dark, you know what I'm saying. It was it was stilhouetted. That was your introduction. So what was your feeling about that? Oh? Like, I just overstepped the boundary something I wasn't supposed to be there. It was like if I walked in on you meditating when mommy's meditating, don't get in her business, you know

what I'm saying. I wish Gammy knew that I meditate to Would you guys feel uncomfortab were talking to your father's about sex? Whenever I talked to doubt about it. It's always an intellectual debate. It's always like about like, okay, So, speaking of the degradation of females in the past, you know, how do you believe that that trickles into your experience? And it's all and it's it's very it's very serious,

but it's not emotional. It's a very intellectual perspective. And I feel like the stuff of life is meant to be lived, not analyzed. You know. I felt like my dad wasn't okay with yeah, me having a sexuality. Most most fathers are not. It's definitely easier to talk with like the same sex parents. Yeah. So do you think we'll had a conversation with Jaden about sex? I'm almost sure that that he did. He probably said, get it, boys, go out there and get you. Did you talk to

Jaden and Trey abou sex? I did? How about I knew when they both lost their virginity. I sure did. My intuition. I knew the night the night Jaden lost his virginity and I had a moment with Trey in the kitchen where I looked at him and I was like, you've had sex, And he ran into the bathroom he did. Yes. It was like, fine, yes, I've had sex. Why did he runs about he was embarrassed? Oh yeahs like you

have to be embarrassed, but he was so embarrassed. Just the energy of them that made you know that they had sex. Yeah, it was it was like a new Their innocence was gone, damn gone. I can always tell with some of your friends too, I'm like, oh, something happened, ye, but I can always tell, like you can just see the maturity. I remember my first sexual experience. It was amazing.

I wouldn't say amazing, like oh you know, but like I remember getting me saying to me, oh, I wish I could be there to hold your hand, and that's going to be terrible. Yeah. I remember her telling me that because hers was terrible experience was very painful and yeah, and mine wasn't. It actually was like it was yeah, it was like okay, yeah, right, you know. But I also came into it differently. My grandmother taught me about self pleasuring because she wanted me to know that that

pleasure was from me. She didn't want me to fall into the hands of a man and if he gave me pleasure to think that that was him, and she taught me at nine. At nine, I had none of that. I had none of what Jada had. You know, her teaching to me was boys are dirty. Don't let them put their tongues in your mouth, and surely not their penises. Yeah. So everything was from a very negative and so none of you to scare me to and so you were probably afraid. Yeah, we as women have been trained that

women aren't supposed to enjoy sex. Sex is not for women, sexes for men. Pleasure is for men, And honestly, I think that's why so many women I know have never had orgasms. Really, Yes, that's a sad day. Yeah, I've struggled in my own sexuality, even in having the information that I had at an early age and yet still having to constantly educate myself and not allow things to come into So if your mom struggled, then you know

I struggled. The demons in the back of my mind are telling me, no, you shouldn't be doing that, and no, good girls don't enjoy a sex. Do you do you feel like even do you feel like you have the freedom now? And where did that come from? I just think it just came over time, because over time you realize, hey, I was there a moment? Was there was their experience?

Was there a man that? You know what I'm saying, because usually there's that aha moment of like the whole world opens up whole when you have your first, like real good, experienced orgasm. I don't know if I remember that, but I just do know that even a couple of years ago, having a conversation with my girlfriends talking about sex toys and all that, and I didn't have any experience with with sex toys right, And they were like, huh,

you don't know what you're missing. I was like, really, he suggested that I go to counseling for that, go to counseling for sex. That fills me with so much anger because men just experience the same thing. I've had a lot of experience with sex toys lots. I don't miss that at all. I feel like it brings the third party into the situation that's not like human Right, Well, what about by yourself? Because I don't think I used toys with a partner, but those toys a lot, I

mean personally, I haven't. Are you still one? Yeah? When did that start? I need to go get no, But I think by your age, I gave myself multiples first, multiple orgasms. Yeah, I didn't. I was really into it at one point, just because I was in an exploration state and I was abstaining from men. Yeah, and I actually think I went through kind of an addiction to with it. Yeah, after people. Yeah, and then one day I was just like enough, like you're having five orgasm today? Yeah,

you gotta because you can create so much pleasure. You just constantly want. It's just like you know and so um yeah yeah with me, and we're like like damn, like that's some other that's the next level right there.

I did find something interesting about your generation in regards to virginity and how one loses virginity, Like I I'm sure for your generation too, that you lose your virginity with somebody you've been seeing, right, somebody that you have feelings with, just right, Like I've heard certain people say, well, I'm older now and I just need to lose my virginity.

So I'm just gonna this guy that I hang out with sometimes and I'm like, really like, just wait till you find that person that you care about and that person is like, no, guys really talking to me or asking me, guys are not brave, that's what do you think in this generation? They're not brave? Doesn't have something to do with technology and texting and really that people don't really know how to deal with dating, like I don't.

I mean it's that like I'm letting you know, like in this day and age, the slide into the d M is like how you get into your relations exactly right, most kids in this day we didn't have that back in the day. No, you just had a joker come up to you and be like, what's so show it in? That's honestly, dude. Nowadays see a beautiful girl, let me text her? Am I gonna let me text? Right? Like, there's a lack of social skills because the technology is

this how you got into your relationship? Did he slide into the DM? Don't judge me, it was m understand. Let me guys a question. If you have a young girl now that a sleeping has multiple partners, is she still considered No, she is considered a regular person. She is a beautiful girl. You just have to keep yourself healthy, health and respect. Yourself respect can be more important than than anything. Loves woman. If you are in a relationship with someone who doesn't respect you, and that is the

most unhealthy relationship and you should get out immediately. Let me ask you, guys a question, because your generation is known as the hook up generation. How do you guys feel about monogamy? That feeling of your my one and my only, there's no one else for me, that would not work. It's a it's a it's a tricky one.

And I tell you, I think about it a lot with married women who are in this sexual monotony of feeling like this obligation towards having to have sex because they're in a monogamous relationship, or sometimes you just don't feel you just don't feel like it, but you feel obligated because you know they do exactly never feel obligated.

Hate when I hear that in all of these like therapists try to be like, you know, make sure you you better go in there and sleep with your man, because if you're not having sex with somebody else's it's because women fear losing their men if sex isn't good, and if you're not having enough sex. It seems like such an unrealistic expectation to put on another human being I think it's really just about everybody having the freedom to find their way and if what works for you.

I'm so happy for you in regards to what in regard to your sexuality, because you've always been pretty free, I think, and just I just didn't have that, but you grow like years, I've been able to work through it, but I'm telling you it has been a challenge, a real challenge, to the point at one point in one of my marriages, he suggested that I go to counseling for that. Wow. Wow, and one of your marriages, Yeah, because I'm four times go to counseling for sex. Yeah.

That fills me with so much anger that I can't even. I can't even because I'm just experience the same thing. That's not true. Do you know how many men I know they've been raped as young boys that I was as protective of Jaden as I was. He was not listen to me, he was not allowed to spend the night at anyone's house because I never underestimated that a boy child could be violated in the same way as a girl child. But you did do a lot of things differently. I did do a lot of things differently,

and let me tell you something else. You got to do a lot of things in this house. Did not faceis book my favorite? Yes? My Facebook family. So Willow, what part of the body do you find the sexiest? I'd have to say in the brain? Yea, the brain for me, that's what I see in men as well. I'll tell you what I'm attracted to this part right here on a man baby, Oh, the next to the shoulder. This conversation, I'm starting to realize how much I don't

think about maybe a strong back. Your father would be so happy to hear that you're looking for somebody like him. Do you believe in love it first sight? Yes? I do. I believe I can look in somebody's eyes and love them. Wow, it's happening before. It's great sex necessary for a great relationship? I don't think so. I think that. Well let me It depends on what kind of person you are. Yeah, I'll say that great sex is not necessary for a great relationship or me, especially after being in a union

for as long as I have been. You start to really focus, Yeah, it gets deep. Is there anything sexy you've wanted to try but were embarrassed to ask your partner about? Give us the tea, Give us the tea. I don't know if I want to talk about this on air and there you haven't both gonna leave that right there. That is our Red Table Talk for today about sex. Thank you so much for joining us here on Facebook. Oh good night, don't wear out. How do you define jim to fluidity? I don't know if I

have a straight answer to that. We had to talk with Dad, Magic Johnson and icon't everything that I came to the top of the Dad, he just let it out and then we both just kind of started crying. We would love to hear from you. Is it important to talk to your children about sex? Is important to talk to your daughter? Give your comments below. I didn't think this was gonna be so hard for me. It really ignites something in you, like damn. The good thing about it is that you don't have to figure it

all out right now, you know what I mean? Yes, we're cute. Okay, some guys for the past. To join the Red Table Talk family and become a part of the conversation. Follow us at facebook dot com slash red table Talk. Thanks for listening to this episode of Red Table Talk podcast produced by Facebook Watch Westbrook audio and I Heart Radio