The Key to Keeping Your Top Performs From Being Recruited Away

So the big question is this, how do recruiting leaders like us who have 12 to 15 other job responsibilities win at this game of recruiting? How do we build a system that allows us to recruit effectively in a minimal amount of time while motivating recruits towards meaningful change? That is the question and this podcast will give you the answers. My name is Richard Mulligan and welcome to Recruiting Conversations.

Welcome back. It's another Recruiting Conversations with your host, Richard Milligan. And today I want to share with you a glimpse inside a recent coach coaching session that I had. And here's what I want to share this with you. The thing that we discussed in this coaching session for you as a leader who recruits now you're recruiting leader, you recruit, but you also lead a team. If you're listening to this podcast, it's highly likely that's you.

There is an aha that you need to have that relates to retaining your current team. And I call that reverse recruiting. And a aha you need to have as it relates to recruiting people who if you're recruiting the best of the best in your marketplace, they would most likely say, I'm happy or I'm not interested in your opportunity.

I'm happy where I'm at, or I'm not interested. And in order for you to actually attract that talent and get that talent to your team, there's a simple premise that you need to understand. And that premise revolves around in a conversation with this recruit extracting their dream. Where do they want to go professionally? Where do they want to go personally over the next 10 years? Because here's my belief. And this is why you've got to listen to this little snippet from this coaching session.

If you can convince, if you can convince someone that you understand their dream and why that dream is important to them and you go on this journey of pursuing them through the lens of that and convincing of that. It is a, not a matter of if it becomes a matter of when they join your team. Now, altruistically, you need to, you need to be able to look in the mirror and with integrity say, I'm all about that. And yes, I can't help them accomplish that.

Okay. And if you can, then I would say as a leader who understands that you bring a ton of value, just anyone who's under your leadership there, then begin becomes an obligation to pursue people through that lens. Because that person is better in the partnership with you and joining your team than they are where they currently are. And here's why. Finding a leader that helps you pursue your dream is a unicorn framework.

Most people are focused on moving the organizational mission forward, on moving their own agenda forward. A lot of leaders have very little value that they bring to the people that are under their leadership or under issues, a manager under their management, because real leaders, like the kind of leaders that are listening to this podcast are leaders that bring an immense amount of value to the people under their care. So listen to this clip and I'll come back and I'll close this podcast out.

You, you want to always ask that question. Look, people don't drink. They just don't. Okay. They dream when they're young. They dream when they're early in their marriage. They dream when they're early in their career, but you get to 20 years in the business, 10 years in the business. Like you're 35, 40, 45, 50, 55, six years old. People just stop dreaming.

When they do surveys on couples that are divorced, they ask them the question, what's the number one reason or the top five reasons why you get divorced? Number one reason is almost always financial challenges, significant financial challenges. Number two question. They almost always say is we stopped dreaming together. Hey, there's an element here, a human element that desire is always present dreaming is taking place where dreaming is not taking place, desire is not present.

And so when you happen upon someone that's in the rhythm of doing work and

has been in this industry for a while. There's almost a zero probability. It's not a zero, but it's a very low, almost a zero probability that that individual, any real dream. So, so when you ask this question, like when you ask the question, where do you want to go? Okay. I think it's really helpful if you give people context. Okay, where do you want to be in 2035? We're about five months into 2034.

So in five months, we'll start a new year 2025 10 years from that 2035 have you thought about where you want to be in a decade? I like asking that I like to give context around that framework around the framework of like, where do you want to go? Because when you think about 10 years anything's possible. It's a big enough window It's like most people think short term like my goal for this year is x Next year, I'd like to push X. Those are short timelines. Goals are typically achievable.

And most people follow the smart methodology, right? Um, realistic is part of smart, right? A realistic achievable goal. Okay. Well, if you go back and I've got, um, you know, I've, I've still got kids at home, right? I've got five children. I've got two, 22. Okay. I'm not that far from having a five year old. If you ask a five year old, what do you want to do with your life? possible. That's the first premise of dreaming, right? Anything's possible.

You get into real life, you get married, you get a career, you work in the industry for X amount of time. Anything's not possible anymore. So for you as a leader, what I found is that it's super important. It's imperative. You want to take someone who's not that motivated. Okay. And you want to motivate them to change. You've got to actually conjure up desire. Desire is tricky.

Okay. It happens upon you without you actually seeking it, searching it in some of the oddest places for better, for worse sometimes. Right. It's like, I mean, I, two years ago I bought a Eagle. It's like an igloo ice chest, but it doubles as an air conditioning unit.

And so it has this condenser unit on the top that recycles the cold water. Actually has two battery packs that actually lasts for 16 hours. Okay, that are that makes it cordless and so it can go anywhere and it can both blow cold air and in a moment on Instagram I six hundred fifty dollars to buy it. Okay, I did not go to Instagram do anything other than to actually Post something and actually engage with my audience. I leave Instagram having spent six hundred fifty dollars. Why?

Because in a moment, I realized more is available, okay? And so as leaders, it's our job to take whatever their framework is, not set any correct expectations, not get over our skis, not to have this conversation of what is over here is bigger and better. But the first premise is that it is highly unlikely this person has sat around at any point in the last decade and dreamed about where he wants to go. Right. So we want to get in this space with him. I want to uncover this.

Like, it's pretty generic to say, Hey, I love being a branch manager. I'm going to be a branch manager. I'm just going to keep doing production. Okay. So I'm going to give you, I'm going to get helpful framework here that will give you how do you pull this out? Okay. But we always start with 10 years. There's two questions. Where do you want to go professionally? Okay. And where do you want to go personally? Those are two different, completely different things.

Okay, someone will say we want to work virtually and retire and have a house in Arizona because I've heard that it's the sun shines 98 percent of the time in Yuma. Okay. And I don't know if that's true, but I've heard that. Okay. And so that's a personal dream. Business dream. Okay. Is that I want to have 12 loan officers in this market. I want to be doing 30 million myself. I want to be, I want to have a book of business.

That's like that's sustainable and achievable and just flows and it's fluid, but we've got to make sure we understand those are two different things. Okay. As we ask that dream question, I'm going to go to a screen share with you here. Okay, so this is this conversation. Okay, and what I just said is that we want to ask the dream question.

And it's basically a piece where it's professional. And it's personal. And that is attached to a 10 year window because in 10 years. Richard could go back to college, get his MD, launch his own doctor practice, even at the age of 50. If that's possible, anything's possible. We start with that first premise, anything is possible. That's the 10 year window, okay? That what is very helpful, and what I did with you, a little bit, was that I used the 10 year window to create context.

Context, if you asked, a great place to go for you in this is, go to your current team. Okay, and ask these questions them great place to practice this. All right. Where do you want to be in 10 years professionally? Where do you want to be in 10 years personally? Okay Context is helpful.

Here's context Richard said he's got five kids He told you their ages were from 2 to 22 and I gave you the ages right context is Richard in 10 years You'll have a 12 year old a 21 year old a 24 year old 27 year old and a 32 year old Is that a different season of life for you? context So you've got, this is where rhythm and practice can be really helpful because you're going to get a lot of this. No, no. Haven't thought about that before. What do you do with that? And you skip it.

You don't skip it because if you have this, okay, you can conjure up desire at will, and for the person that you can get excited, they want to build a house on this awesome link. Right. They want to spend 50 percent of their time. They're working virtually in 10 years. Okay. That person when you pull that in into the framework and over and over again of how you recruit them. I'm the leader. I'm leader. I'm the leader that will help you accomplish that dream.

Okay. You have you are equipped with something that no one else, including their current leaders not equipped with because they're not focusing on it. They're not talking about it. They're not resurfacing this. And this has nothing to do with making you some awesome regional manager and your second command at the company.

This has everything to do with other stuff that matters more to most people. Context. Okay. Here's context. You mentioned that he wants to be a branch manager. He wants to be a branch manager and continue on production. Here's context. Do you still want to be doing 18 million a year in 10 years? That's context. Okay. 10 years from now, do you want to be leading one junior and one assistant? Or do you want it to be bigger? Okay. Context allows people to have this framework of dreaming.

And this is it. Like if I went to one of my kids at the age of 5, I promise you this. If I went to one of my kids at the age of 5 and I said to them, What do you want to do this next week? What Okay, we live on 25 acres, we have four horses, our property backs up to a 20 acre lake. We have an awesome life right now. My kid would probably say, I want to have some friends over and ride my horses. They don't know it's possible, right?

And so if I said to them, in context, let me show you something else, because there's this place called Disney World, okay, there's this place called Disneyland, like I could show these to you. And in context, I would think their dream would get bigger, right? So a lot of times people don't really fully. Dwell on this, think on this, and I need you to actually coach them through this with context. Okay? Okay. Context is there now. Where do we want to go?

Okay, where we want to go in this conversation now is that once I have it, I'm going to ask the question, why is that important to you? Okay, let me give you an example of this conversation with a young man goes like this. What's the big dream? Where do you want to go professionally? And he says, I want to make 300, 000 a year. Oh, that's awesome. Talk to me about that 300k. Like where'd that number come from? And he said, the number comes from that. My wife's a pharmaceutical sales rep.

She makes about 180, 000 a year. And we have an agreement that when I can replace her income, she gets to come home and be a stay at home mom. Oh, cool. How many kids do you have? I have one kid right now. Okay. Awesome. Okay. So I've got a pretty good framework here, right?

300K is like the professional big dream. But I asked this question, why is her coming home and being a stay at home mom important to you? And this is her response. We've made this agreement. We want to grow our family, but it's just difficult. I work a lot. She works a lot. We have one kid right now. When she comes home, we've agreed that we're going to actually have another boy and another girl.

And I'm like, wow, the why question, why is that important to you pulls out a way better response, a way better answer than just the, I want to make 000 is very transactional. We want to grow our family and have three kids, very transformational. The why question is important to this. Now, the next part of this is, you've got to reframe it for them. Okay, so when you reframe something for someone, here's what it sounds like. If I heard you correctly, what I heard you say was.

You're going to memorize that. If I heard you correctly, what I heard you say was. If I heard you correctly, what I heard you say was this. You want to make 300, 000. The 300, 000 is important to you because when you make 300, 000, your wife gets to quit her job, come home and be a stay at home mom, and that you all start, that you all go from being a family of three to a family of five. Did I hear you correctly, ? If I heard you correctly, what I heard you say, we reframe it.

Because the reason why you reframe it is this, almost always, it just cracks me up, because the person doesn't have a dream, suddenly now has a dream, when I reframe it for you, you will say this, That's part of it. Okay. And I want to know the whole part, right? So you have to reframe it. Okay. So we reframe and we gain agreement on it. Gaining agreement just means like that. You said, yes, that's the whole part.

And the reason why this is bullseye, if you're throwing darts at like technology and compensation in things that are sub par to big dreams, okay. Then your bullseye can be out here. And you're missing the mark. So I want you to, I want you to memorize this because we're sitting with someone

and like, you don't fully know his yet. You have part of it. This is an awesome framework for you to go back and to say, listen, our last conversation, you mentioned where you want to go with this. I want to dig a little bit deeper on that and make sure I fully understand what's important to you. And now you have a framework to take him through. Here's the deal. When you have this. You never let it go.

What I've been able to prove in my own journey is this, is that when I understand your dream, if I can help you accomplish that, sometimes I cannot. I'll tell you some crazy stories, like I've had in the past four years, I've had two people on my team that, that came to me and said, when I asked this question while I'm recruiting them, they said, I don't know if I feel comfortable sharing with you my big dream. Come on, bring it on.

Like I'm a dreamer and I've had two people say, I want to start my own business. What do you do with that? Well, does that fit mom? Does not fit my model. And I have said to them, tell me more about that. You want to start your own business. Okay. And they've gone into elaborating around it. I've asked like, why is that important to you? And I've gotten into, if I heard you correctly, what I heard you say was I hired both those people.

Okay. When they came to my team, the first thing I did was I hired them a coach to help them launch their business within a two year window. Both those people left launched their own business. Okay, and they've done some amazing things outside of this.

We still we're still connected I still follow them They've done some amazing things with those businesses But I could have either passed on that or I could have said In the short term does it align with my vision and they're and they're amazing human beings and it did And so for two years, I got these awesome people that helped us propel our vision forward And at the end of that I was able to high five them plant a tree that I will never get to fully see grow You And so

in this, there are things like those people join my organization and gave up two years of their dream because I was willing to come alongside to help them accomplish their dream as a leader, okay? When you understand the dream, if you will convince people that you above any

other leader will help them accomplish that dream, I honestly believe that it's not a matter of if people will join your team, it becomes a matter of when people will join your team. Okay? So I want you to take a screenshot of this. Get it tattooed on the inside of your wrist, I'm just kidding. Okay, I'm passionate about this because this is some of your great sauce. Okay, we're back from that look into a coaching session. And I want to give you a actionable takeaway.

Here's the actual takeaway. Go to your current team and take that methodology and take that cycle that I was, if you were, you couldn't see live in the session, but I was kind of using the whiteboard and I was drawing in real time, kind of a cycle, like a series of sequences that bring you full circle to having the dream that you can now walk away with. And I want you to take that to your current team. If you want to retain your people, know their dream.

If you want to recruit great people in your market, um, know their dream. And so a great place to practice this is like right here within the current team, okay? If you don't have a current team, practice it on your friends, practice it on your spouse, practice it on your children, okay? When you have this tool called Extracting Someone's Dream and gaining agreement on it in your toolbox, You are a force to be reckoned with when it comes to retaining and when it comes to recruiting.

Now, here's the challenge, forever resurface that dream. Continuously resurface that dream. I just love this idea of being able to altruistically, right, with pure motives and with the correct heart posture, being able to sit with people, understand their dream, and then go on this journey. of like forever pursuing them through the lens of that and resurfacing that over and over again. And here's why I love it. There are so many people today in any business that have basically zero desire.

And the reason why they have zero desire is that desire is pretty tricky. It just happens upon us a lot of times in weird places for what seems like no apparent reason. But there is a reason, and here's the reason. When we humans realize more is available, right? Like more is available. Desire happens upon us. And as with you as a leader, being able to now resurface, get the dream and now resurface it again and again and again.

And sometimes when you're recruiting, this is going to be a year, a two year, a three year window of time that you're resurfacing the dream. Okay. Um, you will be the leader that can dominate recruiting in a marketplace, even where You don't have a unicorn business framework to offer people. And that is the new world that most of us are operating in is that most companies are very similar to other companies that we're competing against.

So this equips you, it gives you a tool in your, uh, in your toolbox or a bullet in your, you know, gun to fire or whatever analogy you want to use here to win the people that you want. on your team in your marketplace moving forward. So go practice it now. And until we come back with another recruiting, recruiting conversations, I'm your host, Richard Mulligan. Thanks so much for listening. Pass us along.

You're, you're surrounded by other recruiting leaders and take this and hand this to someone else and, and as a gift to equip them on their journey, becoming the best recruiting leader possible. We'll talk to you again soon. Have a great week, everybody. Want more recruiting conversations? You can register for my weekly email at 4crecruiting. com. If you need help creating your own unique recruiting system, you can book a time with me at bookrichardnow. com.