Talk Therapy: Burnout Exposed - Emotional Exhaustion

We are in a series all about burnout. I interviewed author and therapist Dr. Amy O’Hana about this topic, and am using her book for this series called “Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You.”

This week we are diving into emotional exhaustion. Dr. O’Hana says, “Once a loving and compassionate person, you are now devoid of feeling. When you experience emotional exhaustion, you can become cynical and sarcastic. This style of relating and communication becomes a coping mechanism to protect your heart from holding more pain than it was intended to hold.”

Today, I want to discuss E.I., which stands for Emotional Intelligence. High E.I. means you can:

• Recognize your feelings and communicate them to others in the moment
• Manage your intense emotions
• Pay attention to the emotions of others
• Understand the emotional climate of a meeting, workplace, or environment and manage it appropriately
• De-escalate situations that are emotionally out of control

If you don’t feel you have a high EI, you are not alone. But the good news is that EI is not something you are born with; rather, it can be developed!

Here are a few tips Dr. O’Hana shares to help develop emotional intelligence:

• Learn the names of emotions and begin to name them in your own experience, such as “I feel disappointed.” I like to use an emotion wheel for this.
• When experiencing intense emotions, such as anger or fear, practice a time out. Find a place to be alone and take deep breaths until you can communicate your emotions respectfully and safely.
• Practice identifying and reflecting other people’s emotions.
• If a situation feels tense, try to identify how people are feeling and then respond to that feeling rather than to their behavior.

Now, let’s pause to process:

• How is your emotional intelligence? Rate it on a scale of 1-10,
• God, what are you saying to me today about turning on my emotions?

Resource mentioned:

Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You

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