Life - it's the best thing we get. And yet it is replete with suffering! Hellish paths or no, you can't enjoy a good soda water from beyond the grave. Should life be protected at all costs? Surely not all costs. What is the limit? Find out, as we perfectly rank yet another idea on our quest that goes until and beyond the boundaries of life itself!
I understand that a lot of people listen to podcasts as a form of escapism. What better way to escape that, than to switch on, lock in, and explicitly explore the concept itself! I'd apologise in advance for ruining the concept, but this distressing experience could end up inspiring you to seek even better platforms of bliss, in which case, I will pre-emptively assume your gratitude and heartfully say, you're welcome :)
Is progress linear? Of course not. But is linear progress? Also no. If you imagine everything as a progress bar, you're probably frustrated by the rate of petrol cars. But, of course, if you're frustrated by slow progress bars, you would have been filtered out of our listenership during our inexplicable 9 month hiatus! Good news for the true loyalists who survive - we're back on the air and on schedule. This episode is about progress :)
Today we're ranking Ambition. But for full disclosure - we are on a mission to rank every single human idea in the correct order from best to worst, so we may be a little biased when it comes to the topic. Fortunately for you, the self-awareness that led to the above disclosure more than offsets any risk of us getting it wrong. "Let's Rank!"
I think I may have already referenced the Tower of Power song, 'What is Hip?', in an earlier episode, but if it's not too 'cringe' to repeat myself, I will once again say: 🎶"sometimes hipness is, what it ain't" 🎶 Something to think about.
I'm starting to think that Nick is picking these topics to send me a message. What's next? 'Being really good at board games'?! Well guess what buddy - it's gonna rank highly! Very highly indeed. Higher than your precious punctuality? We must wait and see!
As a kid I had a varnished timber bed and it was impossible to lie there at night and not find all sorts of faces and other patterns in the knots of the wood. Similarly, it seems to be unavoidable to some degree to do the same at the conceptual level and ascribe human traits to all sorts of extremely non-human inanimate features of our lives. We even name cyclones. Seems pretty cool. Maybe in time people will develop parasocial relationships with the random white noise sound that we release unde...
Who could more deserving of an elegant description of this episode than you, the person who has come to read one? And yet, there's so seldomly one to find here. Far more likely that you'll find a slathering of semi-conscious, tediously self-referential musings on the noun that forms the week's episode. But, of course, if you'd been here before then you'd know what to expect, and what more would you then deserve? Maybe it's all perfect after all. Of course it is....
This episode description? Wow, you found it! Well done, I'm honestly surprised. But can you read it? You can? Oh yeah, that's right - you love to read. How else would you enjoy your subscription to Dork Magazine? Haha, I'm just kidding around! You're really normal. Don't worry. You'll never have to worry about being exceptional. You honestly couldn't fit in any better, even if you had a podcast ranking all human ideas so you could talk to your good friend regularly. Your friend who for some reas...
The premium way to prevent people from storming your fortress, is to surround it with a deep trench that you fill with water. I'm sorry if this is news to you. If you think that this episode is looking at moats as a mere metaphor, then I invite you to raid our podcast HQ. But I have to warn you, you're going to need to bring a big bridge with you. Because there's a moat.
It's incredible to think that after all these years, the Rank Ideas podcast is just four trophies away from our feted EGOT. While we wait, we are lucky to have the greatest award of all - friendship. And this old soccer trophy I have that says 'best podcast co-host' in Nick's handwriting. Are awards generally any good though? Listen up to know definitively!
I wonder if there's been a single year in the history of our species where a person hasn't taken the life of another. It would have to have been a year when there weren't many of us around. I hope we can get another such year soon! 2024 is already out, so it'll have to be 2025. In the meantime, is the idea of murder useful in our quest for good life? Only time will tell. Time, and this episode of your favourite podcast, Rank Ideas!
la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la feel free to add your own intonation :)
Whimsy. /ˈwɪmzi/ synonyms: arbitrariness, capriciousness, flightiness, whimsey, whimsicality. type of: irresponsibility, irresponsibleness. Damn. That doesn't sound so good. Good thing the thesaurus doesn't have much of a role in modern society. Especially not in the Rank Ideas HQ, which doesn't even have a bookshelf. Purple monkey dishwasher.
Every episode we release these days is about generalisation. Same must go for every podcast. That's new media for you. Next you'll be telling me that all new media is podcasts. Which, also, is correct.
Excited to report that our species is almost totally connected to each other and we can finally find harmony by hearing everyone's perspective. Ceaselessly. Don't forget to like, share and subscribe!
In writing this episode description I looked up the 7 deadly sins. It turns out there used to be more but they were cut down by combining them and then re-expanded before being picked up by Billy Graham of all people. He still holds the record for largest crowd at the Melbourne Cricket Ground - something like 160,000 in the 1950s. More than 7% of the entire city at the time. Insane to imagine. Some of the sins we lost include Tristitia (despondency) and Ἀκηδία (dejection), which I think is inter...
Time might seem like a funny thing to rank - after all it's an undeniable part of the natural world. But with a bit of digging, it seems clear that our experience of time is really impacted by our cultural framing of it. For the best? You tell us! By meeting us in the past, ideally at a time when we were better at checking our emails.
This week the guys have invented a new game for you to try! Unashamedly, it's called Rank Ideas. Basically, everyone on the planet gets together in pairs and ranks all human ideas on an ever-expanding list in order from best to worst. It's super fun, we just know you'll love it. Thanks for playing! We'll go first.
To 'give up' is a phrasal verb. I learned this a couple of decades ago when I successfully lied my way into a job as an English teacher for adults. I kept it up for six months, always learning one class ahead of my students. It was really fun and I loved it, but then my girlfriend moved abroad and we broke up so I eventually gave up on my whole life at the time. 9/10 use of six months.
Rank Ideas is an important cultural project. "rAnK iDeaS iS aN imPorTanT CulTurAl pROjecT"
War is surely bad. Peace is surely good. So, it naturally follows that Pacifism must be... You'll simply have to listen in to find out. In the meantime, be grateful that Nick and Chris have buried the hatchet for long enough to return for another flawless episode of Rank Ideas!
Money, it's a gas, makes the world go round, must be funny, if I were a rich man, etc. Our ranking is based upon a small sample size. If you are dissatisfied with the result, please send more data to: Christopher Endrey Bsb: 063254 Acc: 10305902 Thanks in advance!
Is respect important to you? I'm not sure if it's important to me. I guess it's about the context. I love to respect the ability of Jeremy Cameron to kick goals from all circumstances but I simultaneously do not respect the things that interfere with my capacity to watch Jeremy Cameron kick goals from all circumstances. Will this come up in the episode? No. Respect ultimately begins with respecting yourself, something you can actively practice by listening to the Rank Ideas™ podcast™ immediately...
I'm sorry I didn't get around to writing a caption for this one, I was too busy lying in the hammock where I play candy crush until the battery dies
The rational brain is the monarch that reigns supreme. That said, it's the rational brain that's making me write this, so maybe don't trust that too much. If you want the purest possible form of truth on this or any matter, simply listen to the Rank Ideas podcast. And, of course, tell your friends to do the same - the rational brain commands it :)
When I think of 'folly' I think of the two most wonderful guys sitting down recording themselves ranking ideas until they get to the end of all of them. Because such a pursuit is in any way foolish? Heaven's no! I think of them, because it's the idea that they're ranking this week :)
This is the first time in our lives that we've ranked sitting. Will we be swayed by the fact that we're sitting during the conversation? Probably, but it's our only real option. Other than, of course, lying down, standing up or kneeling.
Fornication can get it! (a ranking)
