>> Speaker A: His face goes dead white, like, eyes get big and just scrabbles out of there. >> Speaker B: Who's this all knowing bathroom goer? Welcome back to privy. Privy is a podcast about bathrooms recorded this week on location. I'm, um. I'm not too sure the. The exact name, uh, of it, but we're going to get into that as we are, uh, joined today by Jerry Crane. Jerry, how are you? >> Speaker A: I'm doing great. >> Speaker C: How are.
>> Speaker B: Very, very good. What is the official title name of, um, where we are at? >> Speaker A: Official title name? Uh, we are at my place of business. >> Speaker C: Perfect. >> Speaker A: Uh, I don't know how much you go into depth about, like, where as. >> Speaker B: Much as you need. >> Speaker A: All right, so local kettle corn company. Susie Q's kettle corn. Uh, local to the Salem, Oregon area.
Been doing it for about two years. My family's owned businesses throughout my life, mostly food service related. This is our newest endeavor, so we're in, uh, our company's bathroom. >> Speaker C: There you go. >> Speaker B: We made it into the special zone of truth. >> Speaker A: I may be halfway out the door a little bit, but we're here.
>> Speaker B: Hey, we're here. Um, yeah, and we were talking before the record, but you said you guys have had a recording or catering, uh, m company for 25 years. >> Speaker A: That's what my dad's been doing. I mean, I'm 24, so he's been doing a little bit longer than I've been alive, but, yeah, I've been working with him on that since I was, like, ten.
>> Speaker B: Wow, that's awesome. Um, what is that like, growing up and just having that as, I guess, kind of like one of the weekend family activities, I imagine, uh, it's weird. >> Speaker A: So talking to other people about it, uh, I think a common theme is like, wow, so you must have grown up really fast. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Which I definitely. I guess, not to toot my own horn in any way, but I definitely did.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: I mean, I'm the oldest of five, and so that kind of thrusts you into responsibility a little bit, but, um, yeah, I've never heard of it pitched that way, necessarily as, like, a weekend family activity. But that's a really good way of putting it, because 100%. There were definitely weekends where it's like, hey, I have three caterings this week. One of them is 6000 people,
one of them is 400 people, one of them is 150. And he's like, all right, uh, Jerry, Jude, Julia, and I've got eight other employees. We're all working on these, that kind of thing. So it was kind of a family activity, but I think it taught me a lot of important lessons growing up pretty early, and I'm very thankful for it. >> Speaker B: A lot of business management and strategies too, I imagine. >> Speaker A: Uh, yeah.
>> Speaker B: And you're talking, like, all sizes of groups, you said, like, thousands and down to just handfuls of people that, yeah. >> Speaker A: Our smallest is typically, like, 60 or 70 people. And then I know that in the past, he's done up to 10,000. >> Speaker B: My goodness. >> Speaker A: That's not a constant. >> Speaker B: What is that event? >> Speaker A: Usually, it's, um, like a massive corporate company picnic. >> Speaker C: Okay.
>> Speaker A: I think that's what that one was. Or it was either. I know our two largest. I think one of them was a massive corporate company picnic. I don't know what company it was for. And the other one was like, ah, a small fair that he was meant to feed everybody at. Okay, got it. Like a county fair. >> Speaker B: You all used to do the baseball? >> Speaker A: Baseball, yeah. The volcano stadium. Do the volcanoes still exist? M that's a loaded question.
>> Speaker C: Okay, perfect. >> Speaker A: They, uh, exist without us, but, uh, they're doing their own thing. They're no longer affiliated with the Giants. They were affiliated with the San Francisco Giants as a farm. Not, I think, a few years ago, San Francisco Giants dropped or actually, a bunch of major teams dropped a bunch of farm teams. >> Speaker C: Wow. >> Speaker A: Um, and people were surprised they dropped the volcanoes
because they had a ton of World Series champs come out of there. Tim Lincoln, buster Posey, others? Uh, uh, yeah. Those are the only ones I've met. >> Speaker B: Uh, wow. >> Speaker A: But, yeah, I think they're their own kind of local, I think their own league, because they have four teams that all play there on rotation, and they do like, a hundred something games a season. But it's different. I've not revisited, but, yeah, I know.
>> Speaker B: We used to take kids with the mentoring gig and, um, sometimes date night. And we moved to Albany. And I've been checked out of the Salem scene so much that it's wild. Every time I come back up, you've shared a little bit about who you are. Um, so we met through friend of the show Aaron. Uh, through d d. Um, was it. >> Speaker A: Aaron or was it. So I guess it was a. >> Speaker B: So for me, it was Aaron.
>> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker B: Because I met Cyrus about the same time. >> Speaker A: Really? I just assumed that you knew Cyrus. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: So I knew Aaron. >> Speaker A: And, um, I guess that makes sense. >> Speaker B: Jesse. Does that sound Jesse? >> Speaker A: Are you talking about his. No, no. Sam's wife, right? Yeah. I don't remember. >> Speaker B: Okay, so Sam and Jesse?
>> Speaker A: Yeah, Sam and Jesse. >> Speaker B: So Sam Beleck. >> Speaker A: Love that guy. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker B: Did he play dnd with us? >> Speaker C: Oh, yeah. Okay. >> Speaker A: He's the reason I started playing dnd. >> Speaker B: Okay, so it was Aaron and. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Who were like. Because I was at Corbin and they're like,
hey, we do d d. Mhm. You should come hang out because Corbin was trying to do their d d thing, but, like, without saying d d. Yeah, I remember one of those. I heard about that. Yeah, it was real special. And I was like, yeah, sure. Never played d d I come and hang out. You had that. >> Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. And it was funny enough, that place was literally right around the corner from here. >> Speaker C: Okay.
>> Speaker A: Yeah, it's the end of the road. You drove down to get here. That's where we were. >> Speaker B: As I was driving in, I'm like, this seems familiar. >> Speaker A: Maybe I'm passing it. And then we ended up moving to another location. >> Speaker B: And I remember that. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Um, that was off of, like, Silverton. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: More into Salem out of.
>> Speaker B: But. So that's where we met. And I was just like, you seemed like this dnd seasoned veteran, and I was like, this starstruck. That's what a 20 sided die looks like, kid. >> Speaker A: That's like, oh, I remember. >> Speaker C: Wow. >> Speaker B: Um, wait, I can do anything. >> Speaker A: Um, I think I remember you specifically saying something like that. Our
first, all of us getting together, you. I think Justin played with us for a little bit, and that was the sentiment. It was like, wait, so I can do anything? And, man, did people try. It's like, yeah, on a technicality, you can do anything. We'll see how it works. >> Speaker B: But we'll put you to sleep and put you in a bag and carry around this campaign if we have to. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Um, but that was kind of how we met.
And then, like you said, cyrus and the church involvement, weirdly enough, um, he's doing ministry down in Albany. Uh, we're miles from each other. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: I meant to ask you if you. But you guys don't connect at all. >> Speaker B: We run into each other a lot. Um, we're both different special types of busy. Yeah. Life is challenging to get folks together. But the youth pastor at his church and I, um, he's actually Dylan. He's been on the show before.
>> Speaker C: Um. >> Speaker B: Yeah, it's just kind of one of those small world things. Um, and we'll talk in a little bit about, uh, what you got going, because I'm relearning about what you've been up to and, uh, vicariously through your stuff. But, uh, as you have navigated this life. And Byron, um, love that guy. Used to go play Pokemon. Go with him for a hot minute. Yeah, there was a few times where we would. Anyway, um, AdHd brain, but I love it.
And this is part of the. Do you have either. It can be you, it can be one of those beloved siblings. Um, but bathroom stories from all those catering or growing up, anything bathroom story related that you. >> Speaker A: It's not like I'm hesitant to share. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: I definitely have one. I've got like two. I had thought about this a little bit. >> Speaker B: Everybody has one. >> Speaker A: Yeah, I definitely have one. I have a few.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: But I'm sure we only have so much time here, right? Hey, well, I know for I can crash course real quick. Really young. I like four years old, going to an old church. Um, definitely went to the bathroom. It was during that time where it's like, hey, I don't know if I shouldn't need my mom to wipe me anymore, but I don't want to make the
leap of personal responsibility. And I know there was a time where I apparently shamelessly just walked out, drawers on the ground, around my ankles and into, I think, some church event, and was just like, does anybody know where my mom is? And only realized the significance of my embarrassment years later. >> Speaker B: Right, right. Well, because when you're a kid, you're kind of off the hook. >> Speaker A: Oh, yeah, you're off the hook for that. But when you're not, then in your
own brain, you're not off the hook. It's like, can't believe I was so ridiculously inept. Um, but, uh, there's that. I think once I'm at a wedding when, uh, I was like eight or nine years old, somebody. I was going to the bathroom. Everybody else, it was at a church. Everybody else is like this big church all the way on the other side of the campus or whatever. And I'm entirely alone doing my business. Automated lights shut. Know, eight year old me is like, oh, no, I'm going to die.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Luckily I had my trusty, uh, Mickey Mouse wristwatch that had a glow feature on it. So only by the light of my dim Mickey Mouse watch could I finish my business and get out of there. But probably the paramount story amongst my life of the bathroom time. >> Speaker B: Oh, boy. >> Speaker A: Which is okay. We have to establish. >> Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. >> Speaker A: It's a zone of precious care. >> Speaker C: Right.
>> Speaker A: Uh, the bathroom. There's almost royalty involved. >> Speaker C: Special place. >> Speaker A: It is a special place, and it shouldn't be taken lightly. Specifically, privacy. Right now, public bathrooms. Public bathrooms, I think, have thrown privacy to the wind just in form of treating us like animals. Right. Horses. Installs. And get your business done and get it done quickly, which there's probably some, uh, wisdom
in that, I guess. But I will always distinctly remember, I think I was 17. >> Speaker C: Why? >> Speaker A: I said, I will distinctly remember. Then said, I think I was 17. >> Speaker B: Hey, you're good. >> Speaker A: And it was either end of junior year, beginning of senior year, and I know, okay. Never really had a lot of money in my life. >> Speaker C: Yeah.
>> Speaker A: Right? So I had, like, one pair of jeans most of high school, and then I think maybe the most I had two. But I knew that both of them had very unfortunate rips in, know right between the legs and those ones that just from wear down, start to open up. So I thought, all right, I got to get some new jeans, some that are a little nicer that I can wear to church and stuff like that, but also work in.
>> Speaker C: Uh. >> Speaker A: All right, so headed to Walmart, where all good things happen. >> Speaker B: That's right. >> Speaker A: And pull into the parking lot, and I'm like, okay, something on the ride there is percolating. >> Speaker B: Oh, yeah. Doing one. >> Speaker A: Something's settling. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: And unsettling again. And then resettling. And I'm like, okay, I don't love
to use public restrooms. I mean, who does? Who's sitting at home going, I wish I was doing this somewhere else. >> Speaker C: Right. >> Speaker B: You know, home is where the heart. >> Speaker A: Is and where the toilet is. Yeah, sorry, no, go for it. >> Speaker B: I have a coworker, and there's no way she listens to this nonsense, so whatever. But she'll take time off, go home to go to the bathroom.
>> Speaker A: She's like, I respect, uh, yeah, depending on the state of the bathroom at the place, you. >> Speaker B: And she's a hard worker, so it's like, yeah, you go for it, girl. I'm not going to argue with you. But, yeah, no, public bathrooms are a disaster. And you're at Walmart's public bathroom is what that's. >> Speaker A: Yeah. So I'm in the mindset of like, okay, I will do whatever I can to make sure I get done with what I have to do so I don't have to use a public
restroom, let alone Walmart. Right? Uh, it's a war zone, right? At least my expectation is it's going to be a war zone. So I pull in the parking spot. I'm m like, all right, well, I'm going to get in here. Get in, get out. I don't like shopping for clothes. And so, yeah, I'm going to get in, get out as quick as I can. But it's a 30 minutes
endeavor at best. And I'm like, okay, I got to make a judgment call right now, because as I'm getting out of the car, I'm like, all right, this is shifting things. >> Speaker C: Oh, no. >> Speaker A: Legs are moving. Starting walking. No longer sitting. >> Speaker B: I'm, like, pumping a little more. >> Speaker A: Can I go 30 minutes? >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: I run the risk of, I think this is my
size. I'll grab these jeans, get them home, and realize I have to come back to return them because I grabbed the wrong ones. >> Speaker C: Right. >> Speaker A: Or I run the risk. >> Speaker C: Man. >> Speaker A: Heaven forbid a horrible accident happened while I'm trying jeans on in the store. That's a hard one to explain. So I. All right, I'm going to have to bite the bullet. The first thing I'm not going to
go shopping. First thing I'm doing, I walk in bathroom or walk into the Walmart. I'm headed straight to the bathroom and I'm mentally preparing myself for the horrifying visage that's going to be a Walmart bathroom because I've been in some shout out to Hood river. They're Walmart. Worst bathroom I've ever seen in my life. Sorry, hood river, you're probably great, but Walmart, get it together. >> Speaker B: Um, I've used the bathroom in that Walmart, and I know exactly what you're talking
about. My wife sent me pictures because it was so bad. >> Speaker C: Oh, yeah. >> Speaker A: You'd think that they'd be. I'm pretty sure right before I got into that bathroom, they were probably cooking. Well, it's terrifying in there. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: Lights are flickering. I'm pretty sure I'm going to get murdered even though I'm the only one in there. No, this one. Uh, I'm in Salem and I'm expecting the worst. Walk in, open the bathroom door. I kid you
not. I thought I was magically transported to Olive Garden or something. >> Speaker C: What? >> Speaker A: Apparently only recently there was, like, burlap or something to make it look country chic in front of the. >> Speaker C: What in the world? >> Speaker A: Okay, right. It doesn't belong in Walmart, but I was grateful for it. Like, little string lights and, uh, cut burlap strips in front of the sinks and mirrors. Nice lights. >> Speaker C: What?
>> Speaker A: Okay, this is not Walmart, but it was magnificent. And I thought, okay, maybe this is a sign I'm going to be okay. >> Speaker B: God's looking out for you. >> Speaker A: He really was. Um, but just wait. >> Speaker B: Oh, no. >> Speaker A: So I'm like, all right, well, uh, this is great. And bonus points because I have a sense about these things. I'm a little afraid of the audibleness of what might be about to happen. >> Speaker C: Right?
>> Speaker A: So best case scenario, I'm the only one in the room, right? Because I don't have to explain myself for the screams of banshees they're probably going to hear. And so. All right. Kind of give a moment of contemplation. I'm listening. I don't think anybody's in here. Quick glance at the foot area of the stalls. All right. Nobody's else is in here. This is great. I have my choice of stall, right? >> Speaker C: Yeah. Great.
>> Speaker A: What an honor. Um, as it goes, walk in the stall, turn around, give it a lock, make sure it's locked. >> Speaker C: Right. >> Speaker A: That's what you should do. Didn't do that. >> Speaker B: Yeah, and make sure it actually m fits in the little groove. >> Speaker A: Never does.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: But I think my hubris or something got the better of me because in this moment, I'm thinking this is the nicest Walmart bathroom I've ever been in. >> Speaker C: Right. >> Speaker A: I just assume the locks are going to work. >> Speaker B: Oh, no. >> Speaker A: Lock the door. Turn around. Also, I'm in a real hurry because if I don't do something quickly, I'm going to die of nuclear explosion or something.
>> Speaker B: Well, and you want to get the pants shopping over with. >> Speaker A: Thank you. >> Speaker C: Exactly. >> Speaker A: No, I get it. So drop Trowel, start the business. Death charges are racing and rocketing out of me and I'm like, okay, I don't know how long of a process this is going to be. Let's speed this up a little bit. I want to get out of here. I hear the creak of the door open and I hear the distinct humming of a child coming into the bathroom.
And he's humming like, you are my sunshine or something. And you can tell. >> Speaker B: Innocent and sweet, of course, right? >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: I mean, he's probably the most innocent little kid. And then I hear as the door shutting, like crying out from outside the bathroom. Uh, hey, Johnny, better keep it quick because we got. Whatever, whatever. I mean, this is years ago, but I just remember somebody saying something to the effect
of like, hurry up, do your business. And I remember them saying his name was Johnny. >> Speaker B: Oh, young Johnny. >> Speaker A: Um, yeah, young Johnny, who's seven years older now, so probably in middle school, he was probably like eight or, uh, maybe ten years old. No, he had to be younger than that. Like eight years old. >> Speaker C: We'll say. Yeah. >> Speaker A: He walks in, I hear him, you are my sun
shining all up and down the bathroom. And, oh, yeah, he's clearly thinking he's alone. I was this kid five minutes ago, right? He's thinking, what serendipitous beauty. >> Speaker B: I have the whole bathroom. >> Speaker A: The best bathroom ever. I have the bathroom to myself. He's walking around, taking his choice of stall. Okay. Serendipity, abandoned. He picks the stall I'm in, right? No, first he's humming m. And he goes, hello. Now, in my mind, I'm
thinking, why would he be speaking to me? All he's saying is hello. I thought maybe he was in response to the people who were yelling at him, right. So I don't say anything. There's a social contract in the bathroom. You don't talk to somebody. >> Speaker B: Don't talk to me. >> Speaker C: Right? >> Speaker A: I don't know you, and we know what I'm doing in here. I don't want to talk to you. So I hear again, uh, hello. And then I hear, oh, well. So I think, okay, he doesn't
care. The door to the stall rattles a little bit. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Oh, uh, he's trying the one next to me. Realizes there's no one in there. Don't know why he didn't pick it. Then he touched the door to mine. The door starts to open. I quickly hand out. I stop it. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Superhero. >> Speaker B: It's not happening. >> Speaker A: No, nothing's happening. >> Speaker B: This child's not going to see this.
>> Speaker A: Nobody's. This is my sanctum. It's the closest thing I'm getting to it at Walmart. And so I stop it abruptly. So the door didn't even open. So as far as he's aware, doors just locked. Okay, kid, get a clue. Door is locked. Don't come in. So I had no time to respond. >> Speaker C: Uh. >> Speaker A: Door closes. He's pushing against it. I mean, luckily, I'm a 17 year old teenage boy, and this kid's not getting passed.
>> Speaker B: I worked out, eat your weedies, kid. >> Speaker A: Yeah, maybe if he had, he would have pushed through. Door doesn't open. I'm like, all right. This kid gets it, stops pushing on the door. Okay, I don't need to address it again. Social contract. I don't want to speak to this kid. He knows the door is locked. He's not coming in. I remove my hand, and then in a moment of such rapid speed, right under the door. >> Speaker B: Oh, my gosh.
>> Speaker A: On his, uh, hands and knees and just looks right up at me and then freezes. >> Speaker B: Like, what did you expect to find here, kid, right? >> Speaker A: Looking at me and just is like, uh. And then he goes, why did you trails off? And I go, no, um, this might be weird, but I just look at him and went, because in my head, I'm angry. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: But I just went, hey, Johnny, now. >> Speaker B: Probably a creepy
kid. I heard his mom or whatever yell his name, but I don't know why. >> Speaker A: So I could be on a list somewhere and not know it, but I'm just like, hey, Johnny, bathroom's occupied. His face goes dead white. Like, eyes get big and just scrabbles out of there. >> Speaker B: Who's this all knowing bathroom goer? >> Speaker A: I'm the guy that sits on top of the know, or whatever, but I'm just in the bathroom, uh, oh, my gosh.
He books it out of the bathroom, runs, door slams. I hear him like, there was a guy. >> Speaker B: Oh, see, that's the part that would give me the most chief anxiety, is hearing there's a guy in the bathroom. While he is upset. I'm like, yeah, well, he wasn't upset. >> Speaker A: He was just like, there's a guy in the bathroom. And I heard the guy go like, yeah, it's a public bathroom. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: And the kid's like, well, I don't have to go anymore.
>> Speaker B: Yeah, I bet. >> Speaker A: And then they leave, right? >> Speaker C: Yeah. Uh. >> Speaker A: I'm like, oh, this is horrifyingly embarrassing. I don't want to have to explain this situation to anybody. So I wait a good ten minutes. I'm like, maybe they'll do their shopping and leave. I finish up my business. I leave the bathroom. No, I'm just praying I don't want to see this kid again. >> Speaker C: Right?
>> Speaker A: The kid's got to be equally embarrassed, if not more. >> Speaker B: Yeah, I don't think he's going to. >> Speaker A: Call attention to it. I don't want to be accused of m something. >> Speaker B: Oh, my. >> Speaker A: And I. I'm a guy. Well, this kid's not going to be shopping in the men's jeans section, Lord willing way. So I go to the men's jeans section. I mean, next aisle over is the shoes. And I look over, I'm like, you've got to be
kidding me. Here is a family, a mother and her few children. One of them being this kid looks at me, and he just eyes so wide, slack jawed. I can only imagine he thinks I'm following him, right? For. >> Speaker B: Oh, my gosh, yes. >> Speaker A: So I went, uh, there's a few ways I could handle this. >> Speaker B: Either I just trying to buy pants. >> Speaker A: I'm just trying to buy pants. Either I could confront his mother and say, hey, be a better mom.
>> Speaker B: Your kids in there do well. >> Speaker A: Yeah, not going to do that. And I went, but maybe I have an opportunity to teach him a lesson. Yeah, think before you do, be a little bit more considerate also. Ah, locked doors. Mean something, right? So I just looked at. I had to get into character a little bit. And I just. The most stoic face. I just. I look at him, and when he's kind of, uh, towards me, kind of adjacent to his family a little bit, I just went, Johnny.
And he just. Eyes wide again, like, how does this guy know my name? And I just grabbed a pair of pants, praying that they're the right one. Then I can't just start mean. This is the drop. It's a drop. The mic. >> Speaker C: Yep. >> Speaker A: Johnny, without looking, grab a pair of pants. I was pretty sure it was the right size. Walked away. Um, never saw him again. Johnny, if you're out there, I want you to know I'm not some weirdo. I, uh, care about your personal growth.
>> Speaker B: And also, you're not sorry, because there's no reason for you to be sorry. >> Speaker A: Thank you. >> Speaker B: Because. >> Speaker A: Grow up, Johnny. >> Speaker B: Uh, also, this kid, to my understanding of this story, never went to the bathroom. >> Speaker A: No, definitely didn't. >> Speaker B: And so I'm sitting here. Yeah, I think this middle schooler was up to young, late elementary, early middle school was up to no good.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Locked bathroom. Just move on. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Uh, so, long story there, man, but hope it was. I think we can all learn something, right? >> Speaker B: Yeah. Uh, so I got two kids, and when my son was three ish, where everything is new and everything is the most interesting thing in the world, there's moments where it's like, hey, kid, I got to go to the bathroom. So that means you got to go to the bathroom.
>> Speaker A: But why? >> Speaker C: What? >> Speaker B: Yeah, they've actually installed these kid strap in kid chairs where you can strap your kid into the chair while you poop. >> Speaker A: Oh, you're talking public restroom. >> Speaker B: Public restroom. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: I thought you're talking about your house. I was like, no. >> Speaker B: Well, that too. There's no privacy there either.
Um, but they strap them in so they can't take off while you're doing bathroom. But some of them don't have that. >> Speaker A: I didn't know bathrooms had that. >> Speaker C: That's close. Some of them do. Some of them do. >> Speaker B: It's a new thing. But the number of times early on age three, is I'm doing my thing, and he's, like, standing there waiting for me, and
he's, like, trying to peek under. And I said, listen, kid, you don't ever do like, even if you don't think there's anybody, uh, you don't ever do that. Because worst case scenario, like, best case scenario, you do it and there's no one there, and it's like, oh, I saw a toilet. Worst case scenario, somebody's either very mad, yeah, you're Johnny, or somebody spits on you or something. That's my thing is there's
mean people that have. And it's like, I'm not trying to justify Johnny, because if you push on the door and it's locked and you keep going, you know what you're in for. >> Speaker A: But I think in that moment when he looked up and his eyes just got really wide, it was just a moment of revelation, of like, uh oh, I did this to myself. Yeah, that's what doors that don't move mean, right, man?
>> Speaker B: Yeah. >> Speaker A: But I will say that whole thing, if I was closer in age to that situation, I could tell the story better, and I know I could, because out of that whole thing, I love narrative writing and all that. I turned around with that, and I had an essay due. It was my senior year, I had an essay due for a narrative essay. >> Speaker B: Oh, perfect. >> Speaker A: I took that story, I spruced it up, I
made it just beautiful. And of course, that's the week I had a wonderful writing teacher. >> Speaker C: Right? >> Speaker A: Actually, you probably know her. She does some work at Corbin. Her name is, um. Well, to us, it was Mrs. Reichelt. I don't know if I want to use her full name, if she's okay with put. >> Speaker B: I'll tell you this, the statistic probability that she's going to hear this is pretty low. >> Speaker A: Her name is Gail.
>> Speaker B: Gail Reichelt. >> Speaker A: Mhm. >> Speaker B: I don't know her. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker B: Yeah, no, you could just bleep her name. Yeah, I mean, she. Hey, it sounds like she's a good writing teacher. >> Speaker A: She really is a wonderful writing teacher. But she was gone that week for whatever reason. We get a sub. Uh, and the sub was like, you need to publish this. Just like, this is incredible. >> Speaker B: Going for it.
>> Speaker A: She's like. It's so funny. She's like, it's bathroom related, but there's some candor. But also, you're careful with your words. So I remember being like, hey, you know what? I'll suffer some embarrassment for a good compliment about my writing or something, but, yeah. >> Speaker B: Did you end up like, no. >> Speaker A: Okay, I guess I am now, huh? >> Speaker B: That's right. >> Speaker A: Putting it out there.
>> Speaker B: You're doing it somewhat involuntarily impromptu. Dang, man. Whenever you get, like, public bathrooms or churches, that is like the through line or bad food. That's the other one that everybody like. Yeah, but nothing happened into your drawers, so that's good news, because the number of stories that I've sat down and started talking to people and they're like, yeah, I just left it at the truck stop. >> Speaker A: Well, I've never had anything like that, really.
So apparently I am a freak because every time I've told people that I have a friend who works on some of the stuff I do, um, with me, his name is Matt. He ridicules me. He actually tells me I'm less of a man for having not pooped my pants. >> Speaker B: See, I don't know if I'd go that far. >> Speaker A: I think he's doing a bit. At least I really hope so. Now my feelings are hurt if I. >> Speaker B: Think you're, I think you are the norm.
Having not, but I, purely anecdotal, I. >> Speaker A: Think I'm not because everybody I've told that to has been like, oh, I've got like, two. >> Speaker B: But that's troubling that maybe I have weird friends. Yeah, well, and it's like, this is one of those things where, you know, as you think about, like, how do I, how do I have a little bit more, like, different demographic of folk and getting ladies to come onto this. My wife has done one battle, God bless her.
Yeah, it's like, wait, what would I be talking about? And it's like, listen, you don't have to share it if you don't want to share it, or if you do, just tell me. No. But the number of ladies that I've talked to are like, yeah, I've had problems, too. >> Speaker A: It's like, yeah, they're human. >> Speaker B: They're human. And it's like, God bless them. They have so much more to deal with. The horror. Anyway, um, how do we move on.
>> Speaker A: My brother, though? Oh, yes, my brother. Quite a few hilarious stories about filling his drawers. >> Speaker B: And you're the big brother, so you get to like, look, I'll tell you. >> Speaker A: Right now, on the route for our company, he 100% filled his drawers real bad because he couldn't make it. Didn't have a spare pair of pants. But he's already done with the route, so he's just going to be in the car on the way
back. Found an old hoodie, tied it around his waist. >> Speaker B: Oh, my gosh. Just like, sat in it. >> Speaker A: Oh, no. Got to a bathroom, cleaned himself up. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: Doesn't have a gun. >> Speaker B: And that is the new pair of pants. >> Speaker A: That is the new pair of pants. >> Speaker B: Oh, my. >> Speaker A: Wearing a hoodie diaper. So shows back up at the shop wearing a hoodie diaper.
>> Speaker B: Oh, my God. >> Speaker A: No questions are necessary, right? You just look and go, where's your pants? I guess he soil distros today. >> Speaker B: Oh, my gosh. >> Speaker A: Yeah, he's got quite a few. >> Speaker B: Did he get in the truck, though? Car? >> Speaker A: Oh, no. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: He was fine. It was contained. >> Speaker C: Okay.
>> Speaker B: And it's time for oversharing. Um, then he's dealing with a lot more solid of a job than I deal with, because. >> Speaker A: On a regular basis. Yeah. Oh, I'm sorry, dude. >> Speaker B: It's one part's coffee. Like, I just drink too much of it. >> Speaker A: I don't drink coffee. >> Speaker B: Oh, man. Yeah, the sweet, beautiful bean juice. Anyway, um, well, I mean, that's a. >> Speaker A: Common denominator for most people then, right?
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Coffee is just silent killer. >> Speaker B: Yeah. That's the side effect that when you're like, well, I am addicted at this point, but what do I do? I could stop. >> Speaker A: And then what am I sacrificing? >> Speaker B: And then as soon as you stop, you're like, oh, man, I haven't gone to the bathroom yet today. I wonder if I'm okay. And it's just because you quit drinking this thing that is probably bad for you in the long run.
>> Speaker C: Right? >> Speaker B: Um, yeah. So I have a number of questions. >> Speaker A: Go for it. >> Speaker B: Um, that I ask everybody on the show. And the first, and starting out kind of simple, is what type of toilet paper, like, brand ply, are you using? Uh, and it can either be here, uh, or at your house, wherever. You said if someone said, jerry, you're in charge of buying, and money is not an option.
>> Speaker A: If I'm in charge of. Oh, m but money's no option. >> Speaker B: Yeah, see, that's the thing is, what do you prefer and what do you use? Those might be different. >> Speaker A: Uh, yeah, I hesitate to say that. Real soft stuff, like what I'm looking at right now, the stuff my dad buys for the office. Quilted, northern soft plush. I don't like this stuff. It's way too soft.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: It's at the point where it rips more purely by the virtue of how soft it is. There has to be some substance. >> Speaker B: There's, like, particles that are happening. >> Speaker A: And then the few times I've had to blow my nose with it, then I have white, uh, flex over, because just putting it up, it's like. It's, like, dusted with, like, a. Yeah. So definitely not the most expensive stuff.
When I was in charge of buying stuff for the house, when I had roommates and bought, I think I just bought, like, the generic Fred Meyer brand and whatever I could see constituted as, like, don't want. I don't want just the thin like transparency. >> Speaker B: The stuff that's in every public school. >> Speaker A: Oh, my goodness. And church. >> Speaker B: Most churches, too. >> Speaker A: And the worst of those is the ones where it's also basically just paper.
>> Speaker C: Paper, yes. >> Speaker A: And it's transparent. So it's like, why am I. This is only lose lose. You're not only cheaping out a little bit, but you're also giving me something that's going to leave me bleeding. >> Speaker B: And you have to use so much of it often. It's like, how does that. >> Speaker C: Uh. >> Speaker B: Then you get these clogs that are not. Because of the.
Sometimes it's not the kids fault. Now, sometimes they're little narrative, but it's like, how did this much toilet paper get in here? Well, because that's how much it takes. >> Speaker A: Because I have to wrap my entire arm just for one. >> Speaker B: It's unbelievable. >> Speaker A: I would just go for whatever I think looks medium. Medium. Even if money is no option. It's like I want some substance to it because I don't
want it tearing on accident. Because then you're a whole new situation. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: Um, medium. >> Speaker C: Whatever. That. >> Speaker A: I don't have a brand. Sorry. >> Speaker B: Right. No, that's fine. Um, dude, I just go to the Costco and buy. >> Speaker C: Mhm. >> Speaker B: The Costco brand because it's big blue bag that's there. What else do when you go to wash your hands? >> Speaker A: Okay, wait, I do that.
>> Speaker B: Are you a liquid soap or a bar soap type of guy? >> Speaker A: Liquid, uh, soap, I think. >> Speaker C: Liquid soap. >> Speaker B: Now take that into the shower. Do we have liquid soap or bar soap in the shower? Bar soap in the shower. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: Not. Didn't used to be, but. >> Speaker B: Okay, so when did the conversion happen? >> Speaker A: Um, probably when I became a man.
>> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: No, just kidding. >> Speaker B: Shots fired. >> Speaker A: No, uh, it happened when I realized. Well, I did as a teenager. Axe is the thing you use. >> Speaker B: Oh, yeah. >> Speaker C: Really? >> Speaker A: I would say when I became a man, I did stop using axe. No offense. >> Speaker B: That is fair. That is a fair one. >> Speaker A: Uh, and to the grown men out there using axe. >> Speaker B: Stop it.
>> Speaker A: Stop it. No, uh, I did use liquid soap for a while, and I did start becoming a little bit more hyper aware. A lot of those soaps, it got some chemicals and stuff in there. And then there were some studies I saw that came out where a lot of them, um, there were some lawsuits against some of those companies about. Shoot, about guys, like, lower t levels and stuff because of it and impotence. And so I was like, well, we. >> Speaker B: Don'T want children someday.
>> Speaker A: I just went, well, maybe I don't want. I'll be more careful what I'm lathering my body with. So I started looking for more organic or something like I just, then I purely went economical. And there is a company out there called Duke Cannon. Duke Cannon, they're one of those, uh, know you got something like that, right? >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker B: Um, have you been watching my Facebook ads, by the
way? The Dr. Squatch, they're everywhere. They've got it figured out. >> Speaker A: I think. Dr. Squatch, a little overrated. My dad bought a few of those and I tried it. They smell good. Yeah, I've never, they're just so small and you go through them so quickly. But Duke Cannon, if you can get, I occasionally watch for like a sale or also Amazon. They sell some of their stuff. Duke Cannon has these huge bricks of soap. Absolutely massive. And they will last me like months.
>> Speaker C: Wow. >> Speaker A: So I will buy, they might cost $1015, but I have them for a very long time and I have this thing that can fit it inside of it. >> Speaker B: Oh, dang. Like a holder. >> Speaker A: Kind of like a loofah holder. >> Speaker C: That's cool. >> Speaker A: Helps to get some more light. >> Speaker B: Um, so it's purely a, ah, cost. >> Speaker A: Decision now, but also canon. I kind of like the bar soap deal.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: So do you share a shower with someone I know that's probably like, okay, my whole family. So since you're a bar soap guy, do you ever etch messages into the bar soap for the other people who use the shower? >> Speaker A: No, but I probably should be now. >> Speaker B: See, I had a buddy, he's like, yeah, I used to send messages to my brothers and sisters in the bar soap. And I'm like, just talk to him. I'm like, that's
the weirdest thing I've ever heard in my entire life. And he goes, yeah, it is what it is. I'm like, you can't just glance. >> Speaker A: It is what it is. >> Speaker B: And I ask all his siblings and they're like, yeah, I didn't really read them. And I'm like, that's bummer. >> Speaker A: Don't tell that guy. Yeah, just crush his hopes and dreams. Yeah, he's sitting here leaving I love you messages, hoping they're reading. They're like, I never paid attention.
>> Speaker B: If I know him, it was more like, I can see you, or like, hey, you missed the spot or something weird like that. Um, okay, so in the same general area, how do you feel about baths? Just in general, hot takes on baths. >> Speaker A: Ooh, hot takes on. Well, I don't frequent them. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: I think the last time I took. >> Speaker B: A bath, probably around the liquid soap days. >> Speaker A: Well, or before.
>> Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. >> Speaker A: I'm sure they have merit. If I have the luxury of time, which is not something that I'm frequent. >> Speaker B: Fair enough. >> Speaker A: Or I'm very familiar with. Um, I still don't think I would. Yeah, because it feels strange. >> Speaker B: Right. Especially as an adult man. There's something about it that's like, this isn't for me anymore.
>> Speaker A: No, because to me, when it comes to the realm of cleanliness, I want to be as efficient as possible, effective as possible. Right. And I feel like m bats are probably doing a disservice in both of those fronts. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: Efficacy. You're sitting in filled for a while. >> Speaker B: That's it right there. Ah, you've nailed it. >> Speaker A: But I get it, though, too, as far as a relaxing.
>> Speaker B: Yeah. >> Speaker A: I'm m not going to vilify someone for doing it. >> Speaker C: Right? >> Speaker B: Absolutely not. >> Speaker C: Um. >> Speaker B: Uh, do you have any bathroom specific pet peeves that are like. I mean, you share a bathroom with your family, so someone's got to be doing something. >> Speaker A: Oh, yeah. >> Speaker C: Uh. >> Speaker A: Wet floors, man. Yes, but
that's not a hot take. I mean, everybody there can be a single person that walks into the bathroom with their socks on and loves that they're soaking wet now. >> Speaker B: But it's so simple to avoid. >> Speaker A: Yeah, but specifically to leaving a wet towel or bath inside a bathroom unsuspecting to me when I walk in there in the dark. Um, I do have some more niche ones, though. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: Specific to my. It here is an example of it.
>> Speaker C: Right. >> Speaker B: Yeah. So we're staring at what looks like a, uh. I like to call that the Arizona print, even. >> Speaker C: Really? >> Speaker B: That's not the right term for it. >> Speaker A: Makes me think. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: So kind of a western ish print. Flannel draped over a box in this bathroom. >> Speaker A: Uh, that and they're gone. But, um, my brother, notorious
for two things involving leaving things, places. One of them being drinks, opens them, takes one, two, maybe three sips out of it, leaves it. Oh, man, you should see his bedroom. Just drinks everywhere. >> Speaker B: Oh, my gosh. >> Speaker A: Two, he leaves shoes and, like, outerwear along a line of flannels, coats every bathroom. I can't imagine. >> Speaker B: So this is his. >> Speaker C: This is his. >> Speaker B: Oh, perfect. >> Speaker C: There you go.
>> Speaker A: This is his, uh, just this week we had a set of sneakers in here. They're not here anymore. And that. We had some construction guys that were coming in and using our bathroom. They saw him and they thought it was weird, so they set him outside the bathroom. Now, you must be thinking, if his shoes are here, what did he walk out in? >> Speaker C: Right, right. >> Speaker A: Heaven knows.
>> Speaker B: Well, that was what I was going to say is like, is he getting in and getting too warm from the job and then ditching parts of the clothes? >> Speaker A: Oh, I can tell you exactly why it's happening, but I don't care what he thinks. Um, he is one of the few. >> Speaker B: Who'S full stripped down when it's Aaron badly, too, apparently. He was like, poop naked. >> Speaker A: Another one I understand the merit of. Used to be that way. In some
ways, yeah. Oh, not in some ways. I used to do that. >> Speaker C: Really? >> Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Growing up, it's like, especially as a kid. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: It's like, why would I want to. >> Speaker B: Risk getting it all? >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: I mean, it's not like I'm a messy user. Porcelain throne. But why risk a potential, uh, splu shit, whatever. And also, there's something freeing about it. Something more
comfortable. Your ankles aren't bound by the restrictions of your. >> Speaker B: But this is at your. Because that every time someone says, yeah, I poop in the buff, or I go to the bathroom in the buff, I'm like, I'd like to say it. >> Speaker A: Was only at my, um, home. >> Speaker B: Okay. Uh, going back, you were not the Johnny situation. >> Speaker A: No, absolutely not.
>> Speaker B: I just had to. No, because somebody is going to be like, no, you didn't ask him about John. And I'm so perfect. >> Speaker A: Absolutely not. That was when I had grown out of it. >> Speaker C: Yes. Good. >> Speaker A: I will tell you, a big proponent of what made me grow out of that was actually Cyrus. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: He knew this about the men in my family. It's a recurring thing.
>> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: And there was a youth trip we went on when I was one of his youth students, 13 or something. I'm pretty sure Aaron Badley was there. We were somewhere else, working at a church, painting and fixing it up and stuff service project. And we're all in the shower because it was a camp, too. We're in the showers and stuff in the bathrooms, and all the guys are in there showering, getting ready for bed and all that stuff and using the
bathroom. And Cyrus was walking down the stalls and guessing who was in each stall by just their shoes. As a joke, he gets to mine and goes, well, the pants and shirt are in front of the feet, so I know that's Jerry. >> Speaker C: Oh, no. >> Speaker A: And then I went, oh, this is known about me. >> Speaker B: And from that moment on, it was, yeah, he cured. >> Speaker A: I was a new man. >> Speaker C: Wow. >> Speaker A: But my brother, 20 years old.
Now, I don't know about stall situations, but I do know he's on the regular private bathrooms and he'll defend it. He'll defend it. >> Speaker B: Oh, perfect. That's the vibe that we want. People who are defending difficult positions, for sure. >> Speaker A: That's my brother in a whole nutshell. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Uh, so some shower specific questions, and these are the, like, just going to ask them tone. Have you ever taken a dark shower?
>> Speaker A: Dark shower? Oh, just in the dark. >> Speaker B: That's not code for dark shower. >> Speaker C: No. >> Speaker B: Dark shower. >> Speaker C: It's not. >> Speaker A: Uh, certainly, yeah. >> Speaker C: Okay. Um. >> Speaker B: Is it by choice? Do you like it? >> Speaker A: I've done it because power was out. >> Speaker C: Okay.
>> Speaker A: Power is out by choice. Which also meant, I think in that case, also meant the shower was cold. >> Speaker C: Uh. >> Speaker B: Oh, true. >> Speaker A: Yeah, true. In some cases, that's not the case with power, but that one was. Uh, but by choice. I think I have by choice before when I was, like, sick or something and I didn't want, like, the lights. >> Speaker B: Were bothering my too much.
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I think I've done that. I also think I just did it once, showering in the dark. But it's a dangerous game. >> Speaker B: See, it's my go to. Um, really, I almost exclusively shower in the dark. Why? I had a guy on the show, he also apparently does this sometimes, and, uh, he described it, especially if you're showering in the morning. He's like, it's like you are birthed into your day. It's dark, the water warms you up. What a weird. Just like, the
light is the last. Like, I don't want this right now. I want it in a little bit. >> Speaker A: No, I get that. Because you're not fully awake. Right. But you want to wake up peacefully, kind of. >> Speaker B: And it's not pitch black. There's usually like a nightlight or something that's given just enough to make you be able to not drop everything and stub your toe and all this stuff. >> Speaker A: Um, that's interesting.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Maybe I'll have to try it. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Have you ever eaten an orange in the shower? Like, you would eat an apple? >> Speaker A: So, like, you peel, like, you're only asking me this question because somebody has. >> Speaker B: No, it's a thing. It's an Internet thing. Uh,
I mean, maybe three or four years ago, where people would. They would peel the orange and then they would just get in the shower and eat the now peeled, like, orange globe, like an apple. And the juices just go everywhere because it's that way. But they don't care because they're in the shower. But then you get, like, I have down. >> Speaker A: It makes sense. It's the most effective way. If you're going to eat an orange that way.
Right, because you're ensuring that you aren't covered in gunk. >> Speaker B: Um, gunk. >> Speaker A: But I would say, no, haven't done that. Have eaten an orange that way just for fun. And I will say it's the superior way of eating an orange, but the juice is not worth the squeeze. >> Speaker C: Uh, there you go. >> Speaker A: Pun intended, actually, yeah. Um, but I mean, it is superior. The orange tastes different when you eat it that way. >> Speaker C: Really?
>> Speaker A: Oh, I'll die on. >> Speaker B: Okay, I have an orange every day at lunch, so my coworkers are going to get to watch me act like a crazy person tomorrow. >> Speaker A: I do think it tastes different. Yeah, I really do. >> Speaker B: I'm going for it tomorrow. Oh, yeah, I'm trying it out, but. >> Speaker A: Then, I mean, you're not in the shower, so you're going to have to deal with mess.
>> Speaker B: Yeah, it's fine. I work at a high school. They spill everywhere. >> Speaker A: They'll probably find it hilarious anyway. >> Speaker B: Oh, I would never do that in front of them. M they would film it and put it on the Internet and be like, whoa, Mr. Hoover's crazy. >> Speaker A: Uh, just get royalties and you're fine. >> Speaker B: Oh, shoot. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Have you ever. Okay,
do you have any snacks or drinks in the shower? Have you ever taken. >> Speaker A: I certainly have. Only because you hear that people do it and you think, okay, either if. >> Speaker B: They can do it, why can't I? >> Speaker A: Exactly. Or maybe there's got to be a reason. I don't think it's worth. >> Speaker B: So do you like Lacroix? >> Speaker A: I actually really do. I love sparkling water.
>> Speaker B: I think that lacroix or any sparkling water doesn't, uh, have to be Lacroix is best. >> Speaker A: I can tell you're sponsored by Lacroix. >> Speaker B: Oh, man. It's the dream is best. Mowing. Like actively mowing or in the shower. >> Speaker A: Okay, why? What changes it? >> Speaker B: In the shower, there's just something about, like, it's bitey and cold and you can
just kind of position. Yeah, you can just kind of drink it faster than normal because everything's already warm. >> Speaker A: Interesting. >> Speaker B: And you can kind of feel it going all the way down. And, uh, it's surreal. >> Speaker A: I can certainly relate to, there are those times where the outside of you is one temperature and you are consuming the opposite. And so you can feel it moving. >> Speaker C: Exactly.
>> Speaker A: That is an interesting sensation. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: And I definitely like it more. Well, I don't know what's better. This is an interesting question. What's better being freezing cold and experiencing the sensation of very hot liquid coursing through your body or really hot weather? Well, I don't know. I prefer to be in the cold anyway. So I'd have to say that the, uh, first one. >> Speaker C: But.
>> Speaker A: No, that's interesting. That's an interesting reason. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: And the mowing is just. There's something because I think it's because mowing feels so, like. I love mowing. >> Speaker A: Really? >> Speaker B: Like free therapy for me. >> Speaker A: I like it when it's over, but that's it. The completion, it's a. I have to.
>> Speaker B: Do this activity, right? And then just having this drink that just stands for fanciness and kind of like, it's kind of like, look at what I've got going on here while I'm doing this. >> Speaker A: Uh, that's probably the best reason I can imagine. >> Speaker B: Yeah. So then no snacks in the shower? >> Speaker A: Uh, not currently. I don't know if I've ever eaten. I know I drank a coke in the shower. >> Speaker C: Okay.
>> Speaker A: Yeah. Um, that's great. I think I did. No, I don't think I've ever gone with snacks. >> Speaker B: Snacks are a little more dangerous. There's a sogginess that you have to avoid also. >> Speaker A: Just like, depending on what the snack is. Unless I'm going full, like, plate and fork, I'm touching whatever I'm eating with my bare hand. I would assume if you're doing that, you have to eat it at the beginning, right?
Because if not, your hands might be touching stuff. >> Speaker B: I had a dude and he's like, yeah, I had the sandwich in the shower. I'm like, oh, what sandwich and chips? And I'm like, how? And he goes, well, you just keep putting it back outside the shower every. >> Speaker A: Time you take a bite. >> Speaker B: But I'm sitting here going, you can't. >> Speaker A: Wash between bites then, right? >> Speaker B: And your hand is wet. Yeah, it's going to
ruin the sandwich. Like three bites in. >> Speaker A: And then if they're chips and they've got, like, the powder flavor, then your fingers. >> Speaker B: Yeah, well, he is a monster. >> Speaker A: Okay. Yeah, well, never mind. >> Speaker B: Um, and then what about on the toilet? Any snacks or drinks on the toilet? >> Speaker A: I've had, like, a bottle of water before and been like, wow, I'm sitting here, right? I'm not close to being done. I need a drink
of water. Taking a drink of water. >> Speaker B: Hydrate. >> Speaker A: Um, I know for a fact, purely out of, I have to do this because I have to both be ingesting energy provisions circumstantially while I'm expelling it, or what's left of it, I have done it. I think it's a little gross. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Just because there's particles in the air. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Bathrooms aren't freighting.
>> Speaker A: No. But I guess if I'm in the right situation where I don't have a choice, I'm not opposed to it, but if you do, it probably shouldn't. >> Speaker B: Yeah. Um, it is what it is. Uh, uh, this is where you learn. >> Speaker A: A lot about people. >> Speaker B: Um, have you ever performed a waffle stomp? M. No. Do you know what a waffle stomp is? >> Speaker A: Oh, I'm familiar. Very good. Where toilet activity is relegated to showers.
>> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: And then you have no choice but to shove it. I'm familiar. >> Speaker C: Um. >> Speaker B: So you have not performed that? >> Speaker A: No. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker B: Would you, what would it take? >> Speaker A: What would it take? Are you talking monetarily? >> Speaker B: No. >> Speaker C: Emergency. >> Speaker B: Uh, so are you, like, I'm going to
shut it off. I'm going to get out and I'm just going to go to the bathroom. >> Speaker A: Oh, I've done that. Which is the worst way to go to the bathroom or one of. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker B: So in my opinion, there's slippery. There's three options when you're in the shower and you have to, you can do that, which is, I think you're catching 90% of 85% of
people just like, they're going to get out and do it. And then there's the waffle stump, which I think is the second best, because the worst is the people who catch it. Like, they poop and catch it. Toss it in the toilet. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker B: With their hand. >> Speaker A: They don't have, like, a special cup for it. >> Speaker B: No. >> Speaker A: Maybe that's too classy for that option.
>> Speaker B: Uh, they just catch it and throw it in the toilet. And that, to me, is a bridge. >> Speaker A: Too far, especially drinking sandwich at the same time. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Oh, my goodness. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: The snacks have got to be put away for that one. >> Speaker A: Okay. >> Speaker B: Yeah, that's just a bridge too far for
me. I can and have wrapped my brain around the waffle stump, but, um, I. >> Speaker A: Guess I can wrap my brain around it only in the context of absolute emergency. >> Speaker B: Right. >> Speaker A: But to me, an absolute emergency is a situation where I already made a mistake and I don't have a towel. >> Speaker B: To dry off with because I've already made a mistake. >> Speaker A: I started the shower process and I go, oh, I
forgot a towel. Which, I mean, that is a whole. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: And if I've already made that fatal error, now I know I have to go to the bathroom. It's like, well, I'm going to have to sit on the toilet. It's going to be so slippery. >> Speaker B: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Um, but I still wouldn't do that. >> Speaker B: You wouldn't stomp it? >> Speaker A: Stomp the waffle? No. >> Speaker B: Oh, dude.
>> Speaker A: But then the other emergency situation I can think of which might justify it in my head is if, you know, it's not solid. >> Speaker B: Like I said. >> Speaker A: Well, in your case, I'm never blasting solids, okay? >> Speaker B: If I am, it's more. >> Speaker A: So are you saying that this is something you regularly. >> Speaker B: Oh, I don't regularly. My wife would not tolerate that. Um, but it has happened.
>> Speaker A: But she tolerates a certain amount of it. >> Speaker B: She tolerates. Oh, yeah. No, it wouldn't. Let me put it this way. If I did it, which is consequently a similarly titled work of fiction or nonfiction, depending on who you. She would never know. I would make sure that it was cleaned up, which she didn't know. The one time that I did it in a shower that we shared, she found out later and was
very upset. Um, she's like, no, you didn't. I was like, well, I had to test it. >> Speaker C: Oh. >> Speaker A: The reason you did it was only because you wanted to see what it was. >> Speaker C: Oh, yeah. >> Speaker B: No, there was no emergency. >> Speaker A: It was curiosity. >> Speaker B: Simple curiosity. >> Speaker A: Um, I can respect that. >> Speaker B: It wasn't bad anyway. >> Speaker A: Um, wasn't bad anyway.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Uh, we don't need to go there. When you get to the toilet paper, how many sheets are you using? >> Speaker A: Because, uh, there's always a test flight. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: Which we have to determine for the rest of the excursion how many I'm using. Test flight is three. Well, test flight is, like, four, I think. And then I can decide, do I want to be nice and use less of it just for the next guy.
>> Speaker B: Right. >> Speaker C: Um. >> Speaker A: Or in some of these transparency. Do I need to be using twelve? >> Speaker B: Right. >> Speaker A: But I think four or five is a happy medium. >> Speaker C: Yeah. Okay. >> Speaker B: That acceptable answer the people that are like, every time I'm using 15 to 20 m. Why you have a blanket? >> Speaker A: I mean, I may be a little conservative on maybe, uh, six or seven is the most.
>> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: Maybe there's some days where I'm not paying attention. And it's like a. Yeah. And I'm like, well, there's seven. >> Speaker B: Those don't count. >> Speaker A: I'm talking, like, when you're thinking about it. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: Probably five or six. >> Speaker C: Yeah. Okay. >> Speaker B: Uh, and then the toilet paper is on the thing. You've replaced the roll.
>> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Is this the over under? >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Are you over under? >> Speaker A: I was waiting for this. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Over. >> Speaker B: Really? >> Speaker A: Oh, 100%. Are you an under? >> Speaker B: It's not important. >> Speaker C: Um. >> Speaker A: Okay. >> Speaker B: I've struck a. I have my reasons, and
we'll defend them one day. Nobody agrees with me, and that's okay. Um, why are you an over guy? >> Speaker A: One, uh, purely aesthetic. >> Speaker B: I can't argue with it. >> Speaker A: Uh, I think it looks better. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: M two, I believe, the original patent. Yes, I'm sure you've heard that. >> Speaker B: Oh, my wife has showed me this. >> Speaker A: Uh, which I think is a stupid reason.
Let's pretend for a second that under is better, which it's not, but let's pretend it is. If under was better, just because the patent showed it, over means literally nothing. >> Speaker B: Right? >> Speaker A: So I will not use that as defense for my case. We can throw that out, and if anybody else does, it should be ignored. >> Speaker B: There you go. >> Speaker A: I like they should be ignored, frankly. >> Speaker C: No, just kidding.
>> Speaker A: Uh, aesthetic, sure. But also aesthetic, uh, only goes so far. Functionality is superior, and I think when it's under, depending on the system that's being used, under can get jammed a little bit in a way that over doesn't. >> Speaker C: Got it. >> Speaker A: Gravity. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Um, the pull. Yeah.
And I really despise, especially some of those public restrooms that have the thing that's gravity is pulling the system down, and they chose to go under. I bet you it's intentional because people. >> Speaker B: Use less, but, oh, guaranteed. >> Speaker A: The thing is pinning the paper. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: You can't get out, and then it tears, and it's always with that really thin paper. And then you got to try and stick your
fingers in there to try and find the paper. But my fingers are massive sausage links, and I can't get them in the. If I had my choice, over. Okay, but at home or, like here, I don't think I look. Yeah, I just throw it on there and then I go, oh, I accidentally didn't go over. And I know I like it over, but I don't care. >> Speaker B: I like it under, but I also don't care when I do it. I've replaced the role and I've done it, and we, uh, should all be happy for that.
>> Speaker A: Yeah, I see what you're saying. >> Speaker B: Done that. >> Speaker A: What a gentleman. >> Speaker B: And where's my gold star now? It's one of those things for me. I remembered to do it. Very good. Well, hey, uh, ah, just as we wrap up and close, I wanted to just talk to you about under the influence, and I know that you were talking about its trajectory, but tell me about all the stuff that you're doing and what you got going on.
>> Speaker A: Um, under the influence. There's a bit of a double meaning there. It's a joke. We're not talking about Hennessy on the show under influence. Is a podcast, uh, that I do with, uh, my brother and my best friend. Um, well, other than my brother, my other best friend, I should say, um, the three of us do it. The joke there is that, uh, we're under the influence of Jesus. >> Speaker C: There you go. Right? >> Speaker A: And it's intentionally campy for a reason.
>> Speaker C: Right? >> Speaker B: Hey, which, by the way, uh, I absolutely love your intro with the guy getting. >> Speaker A: That's Jude, my brother. It cracks me up by a real police officer. >> Speaker B: Really? That makes it better? >> Speaker A: Oh, yeah. That detail. This might be the first time I've ever shared that detail in any formal form. Um, it only just adds to it for us knowing that jude,
now, he wasn't actually pulled over, right. But it was just like, hey, we know this guy to be a cop. That's the only reason we're asking you to do it. >> Speaker B: Yeah, that's, uh, awesome. That's super cool. >> Speaker A: It was done before I was involved in the show. They made that because Jude had this idea for a show and then I got involved and we kind of changed things. But we use the same intro. Yeah, I love the intro. It's funny. And we've
got two variants. The one we use for season one and then the season two one that we're doing is, uh, where they did it in terrible Boston accents. >> Speaker B: Okay, so I've heard the Boston accents. I need to go back to some of the earlier ones because I jumped in like, a couple of episodes in season two and I went back to the beginning of it and need to go farther back. >> Speaker A: Yeah, we got 24 episode seasons. We're doing six month season chunks. >> Speaker C: Right.
>> Speaker A: Because we do weekly. Um, and they range between an hour and 45 minutes at the most. But it's just the three of us. We found ourselves in a situation. We were living together for a while and we see each other regularly. We'd like to sit and talk to one another. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: And we thought, everybody's got a podcast now, and most of them are just conversations between friends.
We're doing that. Let's do it. And I'm also involved in an online ministry called christian influence. >> Speaker C: Okay. >> Speaker A: Which is dedicated to, uh, it started originally as a gaming centric thing. >> Speaker C: Right. >> Speaker A: Our tagline was crossover gaming. >> Speaker C: Right? >> Speaker A: Putting the gospel first. That's cool. Online. And the purpose of it is to have a place online. I mean, so many kids
are playing video games, right? And parents, I think, would like to think that they know what their kids are doing or what their kids are being subjected to. But obviously, unless you're assuming the worst, you don't. >> Speaker B: Right. >> Speaker A: Um, so our goal with that is to have a place where anybody, kids, whatever, that's awesome. Can play video games, share in media and content. That is, at the very least, being made by Christians under a godly influence.
>> Speaker B: That's awesome. >> Speaker A: And direction. Um, so we wanted a main podcast and show for that. So we dredged up those old audio files for the intro and went, all right, let's just do a show where the three of us who love each other and want to push each other into growing in Christ and being godly men, uh, tell funny jokes for 45 minutes and then have meaningful conversation for another 30. >> Speaker B: Oh, my goodness. And it really is.
I don't know how much of it is returning bits and how much of it is, like, new stuff, because, like I said, I'm season two here. But you all recently did one where you look at some, for lack of a better term, like, just whack Bible teaching with quotes like, um, prosperity folks, and just talk about, man, that type stuff. I hear it and I'm like, I live for this. >> Speaker C: Oh, good. >> Speaker B: This is so good.
>> Speaker A: Well, none of us are biblical scholars. None of us are trained, went, uh, to school for it. We've got some friends who work on the show with us who, if we do anything out of line, will correct us. Uh, well trained Bible teacher and working on his doctorate, but he will. Hey, you said this thing. You shouldn't have said it. We're taking it out. That hasn't happened yet. >> Speaker B: Yeah, here they go.
>> Speaker A: But, um. Yeah, that's important to us to make sure that we don't accidentally become what we're criticizing, right? >> Speaker B: No, but, dude, it's good. And I think that's really, um, my son, he's super into the video games, and we have done pretty good at finding who are the people that are doing the dumb stuff on here and definitely am going to get him, show him this and be like, hey, yeah. Because he
loves. We do a kids ministry. He's all about it. And so just him knowing, like, yeah, these guys, they believe in Jesus like we do, buddy. And, um, that goes a long way. That's super cool. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Our goal is to provide a place for all of that. The community that surrounds video games and online content of all kinds, streamers,
YouTubers. We're growing. And then podcasts and stuff like that is to have a place for that community to exist that moderated and then bringing it back to what's important. >> Speaker C: Right? >> Speaker A: We enjoy the things we love, but let's do it for the glory of God. Right. And then also to provide the things themselves. So we have a Minecraft server. We have a bunch of arc servers, um, a bunch of servers in a bunch of different games and then clubs in some of the competitive
first person shooter games and stuff like that. Um. >> Speaker B: That's awesome. Yeah. >> Speaker A: It's something I didn't start, but I got involved in, and then now I am a co owner in. And we're pushing it as much as we can. Well, uh, I shouldn't say pushing it as much as we can. >> Speaker B: We are, and that's called christian influence. >> Speaker A: Christian influence. Yeah. We're primarily
a discord server. We have a website as well, but the community is hosted on discord. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker B: Uh, I'll stick the stuff in the. >> Speaker C: Okay, cool. >> Speaker B: Doodly booper. >> Speaker A: And the doodly booper. >> Speaker B: That's what I call it, because I. >> Speaker A: Yeah, that's a good one. Yeah, no, that's the doobly do, but doodly Booper is a good doodle, I think. Superior. >> Speaker C: Yeah.
>> Speaker B: Sweet. Um, and then you have a, uh, dungeons and dragons. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: So I have two podcasts. >> Speaker C: Yes. >> Speaker A: Under the influence, which is just the comedy and christian life one. And then, um, I'm a huge fan of DND. We talked about at the start, and I've been playing for years. Uh, I've been told I'm pretty good at running it. And so we thought, you know what, DNd podcasts. Huge thing. >> Speaker C: Yes.
>> Speaker A: Let's take our home game. That one is more edited down to be because it's like a four hour session of DND, right. Edited into two, like, hour and a half episodes. But we slap some cool music in there and throw some sound effects and, yeah, we have fun with that. That one comes out on Fridays, and that one's called, uh, of lore and legend. >> Speaker B: Of lore and legend. Sweet. >> Speaker A: Uh, yeah, it's a lot of fun.
>> Speaker B: Yeah. Wherever people are listening to this nonsense, they'll probably be able to find those, I assume. >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Of lore and legend is not quite big enough that it comes up at the top of searches right now. There's a bunch of other shows, but if you look for under the influence or christian influence on Spotify, I've actually found that you can find that one, which is cool. >> Speaker B: Yeah, it was not hard for me to find it,
so that's good. Yeah, that's awesome, man. >> Speaker A: Well, thank you. >> Speaker B: Um, do you have any parting remarks for me or whoever is m the bathroom enthusiast? >> Speaker A: Oh, bathroom enthusiasts, man. Well, to the bathroom enthusiasts, um, you're a small crowd, but keep troopers really? >> Speaker C: Yeah. >> Speaker A: Because I can't think of something else that has to be more, I mean, weird to talk about,
to be enthusiastic about. So I think there's some respect that is owed to those of you who are bathroom enthusiasts. So, well done. Keep doing what you love. Um, but, yeah, I think your show is great. I need to listen to more of it. I've enjoyed it. M I'm appreciative to get to see you do this. It's been fun. >> Speaker B: Yeah, I was pumped when you commented. I was like, oh, man, I saw. >> Speaker A: The episode with you and Aaron, and. >> Speaker B: I was like, it was a wild
ride. Um, well, sweet. Well, I'm going to do what I call my dog is going to the bathroom in the backyard, and I'm watching, and it's awkward looking, um, and close the show. This has been another episode of privy. Thanks so much for joining us, as always. Uh, go check out, um, under the influence and christian influence, as well as, uh, of Lauren legend. Uh, go check those out, and go check out the stuff that Jerry and his brother and friend are doing. It's good
stuff. Um, you can send us an email. Privycast@gmail.com. >> Speaker C: Episode. >> Speaker B: Uh, suggestions, ideas, all those things. Tread lightly. Follow, uh, us on social media. We're at privycast. And now, as always, don't forget to flush. Yes. Oh, got a little splash on the backside, I think.