SAM JAY

Hello, welcome to private Talk. I'm excited to get to know you a little bit more, have it more like you know, one on one conversation, and get to know all the things about Sam Jay.

I'm excited to let's do it. Are you ready for me?

Uh?

Yeah, I'm ready. I stay ready, Stay ready. I like that.

You know, we were talking before we started it, and I had to get that out of the way of like, you know, you watch my movies, I've I've seabled I don't really I don't buy porn. Okay, so, but who buys porn these days? Unfortunately you all should buy a porn or have you know, subscription only fans like mine.

But but definitely I've seen, like you know, Twitter porn clips. Okay, I'm an ex Hamster person.

Okay, so you naughty. You're naughty with the free porn. That's what you're admitting to us here now live on private h Well, maybe you know, we'll you know, pull you over to the other side and make you have at least a subscription of somebody of some of your favorites. Maybe not, maybe dabble a little bit it feel it feels real.

I should maybe you know what just out of like the support of the porn on community exactly I should do it right.

That's where I feel like we're so what happens.

With the free porn because I never even thought about these I never even thought about porn rights.

This is why we're here, guys. And that's the thing is we don't get paid at all. It's basically it was just like when someone like steals your music or your content whatever it's.

And they could dedicate whole site citus and make money, but you don't make any money.

Now I don't like that at all. I think you need to tell the people what we have and the people like to do what you're doing. And unfortunately, sometimes when we don't have the conversations that we're having, we don't know those things.

But that's also why.

People in platforms like OnlyFans kind of started going around and having a third party person but where we had more ownership.

So you know what it is we have to fix.

Because I know why I don't subscribe to porn is because like it makes me feel like I'm committing to some like nasty shit, Like I'm really like, I really want the nasty ship to be a part of my life.

Because like I'm.

Like a gym membership. Like you're like, how can I ever get out that? You don't know if like you can like you let the mail from porn hub or somewhere being like you know, yeah, it's like it feels like a real reason why are you moving? Are you doing?

One? Are the terms that they.

Make it so difficult you feel like such a like now I'm like a porn nigga. Okay, you know what I'm saying with where it's like when I just pat pop in and out watch a little freaks, but I'm just like, oh that was my mood today, okay, versus iig month, I'm giving up the bread. Then it's like this, I'm committing to being this type of person.

But don't you think that in the flip side, what if I like really was an avid fan of like your your work right, and I need to like to get off in that way of like getting to fulfillment of laughing and making you make you feel good, And I just want it for free, but you have it on sale, but I'm gonna take it for free. No, You're right, It's like but you know I'm gonna get mine, so I'm gonna take it for free.

You're right, You're right, You're right. I'm gonna buy some porn every month. That's I'm committing on the show.

I will purchase some porn every month. Compromise. We love that. Here a private talk.

It's all about man, because I'm a person, and that's what I'm gonna tell people when they ask.

I'm like, this has nothing to do with me, like and the people who do very good people too.

Yeah, y'all got to make one of those Saved the Children commercials and just be like, hey, bro.

You know I always say I got this from something early on in my heread. It's like I were people helping people one time. It's true, and I feel like that's a real life.

You keep it a lot of people safe, exactly.

You know, a lot of time would happen if they weren't a lot of times more.

Buildings blowing up, you know what I mean.

I don't know about any of that, but yeah, hey, I know what kind of.

Porn you like? Huh mmmm? I run the gambit?

Okay, so this is a gamble whatever like pops up as a free ad or like what's going.

Not not like not like a scavenger. It's not. But that's why I say. You say it's always like I had a doter porn.

But you're so you know how they tell you your phone and all these devices listen to you, right, so they like know what you like. So there's probably some girl or in a Lexus Texas ad that pops.

Up and maybe you like, oh, like get click on it.

Maybe not, I go.

It just depends on my mood. So how many times are you?

Oh, not that much now, it's not crazy for me, like maybe time, Oh I might.

Go a week, two weeks, okay.

Is that because you have a lot of sex or because you're just not a highly sexual person.

It's so weird.

I am a highly sexual person. When I'm around somebody, I want to fuck a lot. But if that's not around, then I'm just like, I don't know if it's like the Capricorn to me that we're so business like. People say we're so business minded and like workaholics and that type of shit, but like if that's not around, then I'm just like, it's not around doing whatever I'm doing. The person may not be around.

But when that's not around either, when it's someone that you want to entertain, you won't even pleasure yourself. I don't or just to eat anything for you.

I don't need to like that.

Like it will happen eventually, But it's not like I'm not today.

I'm not super.

Horny unless I'm like actively fucking someone.

Okay, I like that.

See, we already got into the porn questions, and that wasn't even where I was going. But I feel like, you know, it just kind of came out, you know, you know, that's where.

We were, and we have to go with with our guts, with our guts.

So what is like your porn search history? If you like, if I was to look at your phone right now, right and just say, obviously you don't look at porn all the time, but if I was to look at the after you watched the porn, what would I see on your screen? Like what would be the video? Yeah, like what type? Like if it's girl on girl, if it's like boy girl, if it's solo stuff.

It's just never solo. I never want to just watch people touch the cells. That's just never does it for me? A lot a lot of a lot of yeah, a lot of uh.

Stepmom, a lot of step mom caught me somewhere ship uh gay porn like gay guy porn worn Uh. I don't really like lesbian pooring that much. Actually, I think it's because I do it. Like for me, a porn on site is like a store. You know, it's like it's voyeurism. It's like I'm gonna go do ship.

I don't do. I want to see people fuck that the way I don't do it, like because so why are you doing it? That's how I feel personally.

So like just watching lesbians and a lot of times they don't even be real lesbians, like fake eat.

You know, they're not real interesting.

You can tell about how they eat or at least how committed they are to lesbian like and I saying they never did some lesbian ship. But there's a way, like straight bitches have gay sex.

Way you're like just say technique, Like what's.

The example, Like it's still yeh kind of the way they like it's like very like childish. It's not like a grown man that just wants to eat.

It's like you're not really want to devour your like your tongue like where you're like, yeah, it's not devout, like playing a little this is also whise for me not to take this upon me. But when I started doing girls inporn, because I didn't start off about doing that, I had never been with the female was I only worked with females that liked females because you can definitely tell.

And I only wanted people who actually.

Liked it know how to eat. So it's like it's gotta be to even exchange or why do it, because if you're just poking around.

Down there, you're a real craftsman and you care exactly.

Get my job done, get my job done. So talking about jobs, So what drew you to comedy? What made you like that's defining moment to what you knew that that was your path?

I always liked it, Like liked comedy, you know. I was like even when I was very young.

Like I used to love Bill Cosby, you.

Know what I'm saying, And like my mom watched a lot of comics, so comedy was kind of like all my sitcoms were, of course just a big deal in the eighties and early nineties, but like she was very much like the comics like Bob Newhart then Taxieah like that type of shit. So it was kind of always around me and I have big funny family, you know, love to joke and stuff. But I didn't really like know like, oh, this is like what I'm going to

It's just in you. It just was in me, you know.

But it was like, damn, I'm really working in a mail room with no windows, you know what I'm saying, Just like getting on a train, is this it?

You know?

And like I see where the highest level of this is, and that's my manager who's sitting in a cubicle across from me. His only joy is getting a new iPhone when it comes out. It is like that will probably end up shooting myself in the head eventually if this stage like this, Yeah, so it was kind of like, yo, go towards your fear and just like see what the fuck capitals.

So with all of that being said, and that's a big you know, things to really be aware about and really also like as much as like it's a big task, it's like such a good thing to be aware at that young age, even in twenty nine. It's like we start from somewhere, right, But what was that like turning point that was like, yeah, you showed up and you're

There was? That's what I'm saying.

It was really no, We're like one moment, I don't think well, there was like, oh there was a moment when I was like, bitch, you're a loser, and that feeling maybe go like you better give this your all.

Okay.

From the first mic I went to, I told myself I was gonna do it for a year no matter what. And I was just gonna like really like fucking drill down on it and see what happened.

And it was because like my life I had the kind of came full circle.

And I was in Atlanta and it was this group of kids that would hang out with my homegirl. We had our own apartment, and it was always like crashing and like trying to sleep on our floor and like living with us, and like I loved him, but it was like this.

Is kind of some like bummy niggas, you know what I'm saying. And then I got so fucked up. In Atlanta.

I was staying with another one of my friends, sleeping on her floor and one of the niggas used to sleep out my floor. When night comes in the house, she had a room. Man, I never met him. He comes in late and it's one of these dudes who used to sleep on my floor and I'm like yo, and he's like, oh damn, I didn't even know you was the friend that needed to crash. And he like he's like all together now and like has a room, you know what I mean. Like I'm on the floor,

What'd you do?

Took my ass home because I needed to do that, went back to Boston and kind of mended show with my family that had gotten weird and funky. Started working just you know, and then I was like.

Half of like year into working in that mail room and I was like, I'm gonna just I'm gonna just try.

So all this time, were you writing stuff or do things just come at your house? Like It's like that is also something that yeah, you say you have a funny family, and you know it comes natural us certain things, But like where did like how did that process start?

I was doing like sneaky shit, like like I would come up with bits and then I would like go to a bar and I would like sit next to a stranger and I would like spark a conversation and I'll like sneak the bit in there and then like see what the stranger left, and then I'd be like, hmm, Okay, that may be something that I might work with more

You can't catch it.

And we were everybody was fucking dying, And I called my friend back in Atlanta and I was like, bro, I'm gonna just do this ship like that was because you asked the moment that was the moment I had to think God was the moment strapping. Yeah, yeah, yeah, well you could say strapping that's appropriate.

Strap in, strap it on you like this, you know what? Yes?

And no, okay, So at first, I like to do it because I want to like a certain dominance and I want the girl and like, hey, I can fuck good okay. But then after a while it's like, bro, I.

Don't feel this ship. Can you leave me alone?

You know?

So did you feel it the first time? No?

But it's about winning, because then it's like, at that point, are you just tired of It's time to move on? Both it's because it's like, you know, if you can't keep it entertaining that.

It's probably both problem. It's probably a little bit of both. But also I just think like it's a lot of work to be strapping bitches.

Bro. I mean, that's the job you chose.

It's a lot or did it choose you did? I? You know, I don't know, didn't choose. It's a lot. It's a lot of work, and it's and it's it's you know what, it's a lot of delusion.

You got to do a lot of mind ship too.

So it's like it's just like, see, that's how detom with it time for me, I have.

To be simulated mind wise for my so actulutely that point, if your mind's not in it, then you're you know.

But it's also like the moves, like if you're trying to if you're trying to strap a girl and you want to keep the ship, like all in the fantasy of what's your favorite happening, you have to first, you can't. You have to slick put on the can't You can't. That's the hardest part because you can't break the you can't break those slick put on the you can't break the illusion like hold on, Yeah, you gotta you gotta

You sneak put it on and don't even let them know you have it on, yes, and every time, and then you just gotta drop.

That's how it happened in real life. Okay, right, I'm wrong, No, I'm just saying yeah, like okay, if you got to keep the whole thing, like what's your go to?

Do you like go to the bathroom and you already have it set up? Do you have like a room?

Yeah, and you know I'm gonna have some shorts on. Okay, bong, I'm gonna put it on. Are you gonna leave the shorts on? I'm gonna leave a shorts Okay. First we're like making out zap, tabsap. Once it gets to that point, it's like boom shorts office.

Right, we're there. You don't even got to see it.

Okay, it's just like, how big is it?

I have more than one? Okay, what's the biggest? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

You know, maybe you just told me.

A whole lot without telling me a whole lot.

Right, you said dominance, it's a winning it's this, so you know what you want that with? You want to secure the wind bringing out? I didn't know it has a name too.

No, I don't even how then how do you know what? I feel like? It depends on the woman, you know what I'm saying.

Like, you're like, hey, but you said it's a sneak.

Sneaker you can tell you like, I'm not I'm not gonna be crazy with this lady. You know what I'm saying. Body else, Like, first of all, I don't mind get that big because I don't believe in that. So what maybe I.

Feel like this this that's crazy.

I would say maybe maybe like nine and a half that's this is it?

Then it gotta be a maybe then maybe seven measure eight.

Maybe like eight maybe like eight. I feel like it's like.

Like, yeah, you touched it in the thickness, like the right stap it around is at the same or not?

Na not crazy, not that like like respect one, respectful about the nickmas, but also we're like together like that. I'm gonna take you to the store and let you pick on because you should decide.

So whenever relationship is over, do you get rid of because they have to new chick like you cannot bring old?

Do you have a favorite one that's I'm okay, I will say that I'm conflicted about this. I'm conflicted about this right this there's a part of me that I believes fully new hit one. Women just don't want that, like like they're just like that's a touchy yeah, and especially because they know.

You could just get a new one, so they like I just want to. Like I feel like if they could do that to men, they would, They.

Just can't, especially at this point, like you said, this is relationships. It's not just fucking right. This is like you know because at that point.

You're committing to a lot, right, But then there's this other part of me that's like the older me that young seem fully was like yeah, but now I'm kind of like man like you you have to accept me and my like I'm grown now, Like, bro, I'm not feena just be here flipping for you, you know, like this is it comes with all of youwasher okaywash dishwash, Like.

I like this though, this is great knowledge because I feel like a lot of people again don't talk about it, but it is a big thing. And also like how that is sexually for you because you have to feel good about it as well, Like that's how your pleasure points you are all those things you know where it's like you don't want it to be awkward for the person either it's already you know, like you said, you want to be surprised. Do you want it to feel like authentic as it can be a new situation?

Sure?

With that is like what would be your signature go to move? Do you have one? Like you're a wrestler, like you know, like do you are you doing like pile driver to these girls? Are you doing like Doggie? Are you doing like? Cause I've only done I've done,

Sam? The sam J move?

All of my signature moves don't really have anything to do with It's like all the ship to build up to good dirty talk. I'm like a good for because I really want like, okay, this is your mouth games. This is so toxic, like all right if I if I fuck you, I really want you to like love me like I'm a psychopath, like, which is bad, I think, especially because sometimes it's like I know I'm just fucking you, but I'm gonna go like I'm gonna do everything like I can demon time.

I'm on demon time, like I want to, like.

Person's gonna remember the liever.

Her forever, no matter how committed I am to the situation, which is not necessarily healthy.

Uh so like could open space feel free?

Like I'm a real like love making as person, you know, which is why my my girl I would hate when I cheated because she's like, I know you, You're giving up way too much in these situations because you're just not.

That tight girl as when you're cheating. Got it.

Yeah, So like I'm gonna do and I'm a girl who's fucked dudes. Okay, so I also know like what to do, Like it's dobollical, Like if we're in conversation and you tell me like where you have an in security in your body, like I'm gonna go there first and kiss it and be like like that's parts perfect.

You know what I'm saying, Like I'm saying in the head, I can see why I've never dated in a capricor that's some ship. We'll die ball.

I'm a Gemini, so I get it, but I don't operate like that. But I understand people who do and not in a sense whatever. But again it's it's because.

I just want you to be like we're fucking I want you to be as open as possible.

So let's and it comes. Yes, it comes from a rooted other issues of things. That's why I say this is a safe space of those things and awareness of all of it. But it all makes sense because that's how you were taught in a sense of where you feel safe in your highest sexual self.

Wow.

Yeah, maybe you gotta come on therapy, come on, shit, mind blown problem? Yeah no, probably it is, yeah, okay, relaxed. But the thing is why I love is like you're honest about it.

And the thing is, it's like even with that being, the awareness of it is like sometimes why it's like we have all the answers to what we have is because when we have conversations like this, when we talk about things like this, and again this is probably something that you need talk to like your closest friends or whatever, but we just met, right, So it's like, but it's

You know it's true, So that you're diabolical shit yeah, so yeah, like you know, so you're going to the course of like what you know people are going to fall for. Yes, sexually yes, sexually not like in practice of relationship but yeah, but but sexually yes absolutely.

But in tune unlocks other doors. Yeah, so that's a diabolical part, but yes, yes, but so yeah, so I'm not in it just like book, you know what I mean. I'm like, Also, the bigger part is you want to enjoy yourself and you know, at that point, at your highest peak, you're feeling good, you're operating like everything's I want, uses are flowing. I also want the you have to offer, and only demons can unlocked up.

So I need to know, like I'm trying.

That's why I'm here to find like why else what part maybe you should have done? So I know that's what makes it bad. I'm just out here in the streets. But yeah, so yeah boom and then so for me, it's not necessarily like about a certain move. It's like because once we're in that space, it's just like a mutual giving and taking.

So you more of a mind fucker, that's your move.

I guess, I guess, I guess.

Okay, I'm learning a lot here like this. You know it's not a damn, it's a wow. Okay, we need to like you need to move into the energy of you know.

What pleases you? Hm hmm.

Is it because they're falling and over you? And that's what it is?

Whatever? Like ego maniaction?

But are they doing something to you and the return of like that?

Why one?

When you when you're despite what people think, when you're rapp is somebody like it's rubbing on shit is happening, Like she's grinded on all that shit is happening. A bit of it is a suspended fantasy.

Of it, you know what I mean? Like you know what I'm saying.

Yeah, you can't if she has grip, you can feel that shit pulling at the strap for sure. Uh.

For the actions, it's emotions.

It's like what you're touching all that kind of stuff? Uh, head for sure, you know what I mean.

So you would say that you like tits before us I would say, yeah, okay, you said before you said anything else, I would say, like for like, we're sucking sucking this and when we say this, is this on your partner or you're receiving this both okay, both okay, so and then walk us through this as far as like the pleasuring of those things, right cause you're the dominant one in the situation, you're doing the sneaky who are doing all the things your girl?

Click, it's not sneaky sneaky.

I don't know there should be a cross word because it's like you're also and I guess it's but the sneaky part is more from the sense of like the surprise element of like you want it to also be enjoyable where it's not like being a whole presentation and putting on this thing it takes away from the the moment.

Yeah, that's I just want to keep the moment.

So I get that. But like so like when you're after she's strapped on, do you take it off then and then you're getting head or is then it's complete and then it's just done? Like where is because at that point going on.

You yeah, sometimes I might.

Sometimes you're it's almost like you're doing scissoring.

Yeah, like I'm good. I don't know why I didn't get like that girly like girl Jean. But I don't need to like ship around times, you know what I mean.

Like that's not I have to. That's not necessary for me.

So it's like if if if I once, I'm kind of like that's cool, I could now could go do some other ship and maybe like if we're chilling, then okay, we go get ooh.

But it's not like I don't need that.

So what's the most of the times in my life? And sure because it is like a world. Yeah it doesn't sound like a lot. Nah, not a lot, Like how many I don't maybe put on the table maybe too, Yeah, maybe that's it.

Yeah, because I really don't.

I really don't want that Like once, I'm like go away kind of like for a minute at least, like get off me.

Of course, like for a minute at least, you know what I mean. So it's like I don't four minutes, go in the corner, don't touch it, or like I don't need all that.

Again, you don't want the person like touching you afterwards?

For sure, it's fine, but I don't need it got it, like if it didn't happen and we just musually rolled over.

I went to a bed. That's fine too. So you're not a cuddler. I can be okay, but I don't. You know, it's not my thing. You don't like being touched? Really not a lot like that?

Okay, I know this is this is this is why I have issues.

Do you like being spanked? Have you ever been spanked?

I don't think in a way that I could respect to make an honest call, And.

I don't think you have issues. I think everyone has issues, right, and let's be honest, Like I think again, it's the honesty of like what when we have conversations, things come out, You're like, yeah, let's think about this a little bit different or like whatever. I think it's intriguing and that's why I think that for me, I'm such an impath and I'm such an open sexual person. That's why I make the joke of doctor Texas but without the PhD is like I just have life and like sexual knowledge.

Sexual, because I think that that shows where you show up and how you.

And like when we talk about love languages and like how you give and receive things and how you need things. It's also too in a sense of where intimacy is different for everybody. And I think that that's, you know, something that some people are not taught. Some people are taught things that are maybe not ideal, and then some

Don't know what I'm doing, but I like it.

And so it's like again how you say, like the when you know of someone they're doing it a certain way or when you're not where it's like sex life, it shouldn't be forced. It should be an organic certain things and everything we do in our crafts of it's business sex from everything, and so I think that that comes along that there's kind of like a maybe a recipe and a formula of how we do things.

No, absolutely, and you're right, it's rooted in shit because I'm not.

I wasn't. I wasn't from like a touchy family. Yeah, I know, I was loved. I was very loved. I felt very loved by my mom.

I felt very protected and love about how olders I'm forty three, okay, but I wasn't.

I never am.

I like, like, we weren't a super huggy, touchy but.

I think it's awesome the time of like and you know, we joke around with my friends that we say the era, but it's like the era of those times of that wasn't something.

That our parents did.

Yeah, because that generationally of what that was is like love is in different forms, different Some people don't give and show and receive love those certain ways. So it's like, yeah, you know the like words sometimes are words, and sometimes touching is uncomfortable unless it's your intimate partner. So it's like then you navigate what those things look like.

And even that is like when it's time for touching, Like if you touch me at an off time, I'm like, whoa, why you like?

But those are But those are the things I think sometimes that we don't realize but in these conversations of leaning into but why because it's like when you have a loving partner or you have someone just that you're being intimate having fun with, it's like sometimes there's a line that needs to be crossed because it's an intimate thing or it could be intimate right and then but

Whatever.

It's like, this is when you do those things, I'm like, but how do you know to do that prior to that? And like how do people know that like the foreplay and a sense of flirting and knowing those things of because that's not how everyone operates.

Can people understand that? Yeah?

But it's like, you know, people are meant to be loved. People I feel like don't show enough love. I think that people think that love is weird sometimes, and people think that when people kiss and hug and they're not in a relationship, they're like, oh, wait, you're fucking like No, it doesn't have to be that. But love is exuded

Like to see the little bit.

Okay, are you the one doing the dirty talk or are they?

Who?

Can I have an example of your dirty talk?

Oh that's crazy.

You go with your words?

I know it.

So look you even.

Know damn what if you what.

If you surprise, sneaky and you came out the bathroom.

I never said it was dark real quick, like let me think I was like without the action. All my all my dirty talk sound like corny.

No, but how do you know, let's hear it.

Let's let us be the jug like like you feel that taking uh good, you're being a good girl.

A couple of good girls in there.

Good girl still say that even if I don't know because you know it is, because I know it is, or I can hear that ship on the what's encouraging words?

What's the one that if you getting you know, the rub and the right thing? And you said that, and it was like what was going to be?

I don't be making those I don't think she was. Okay, know what I'm saying. When she's that, I keep all my girl noises. I'm the girl doing it to you.

When I'm doing that, and at the look back, what would be that thing you just told me?

Oh? I would just be.

Like, oh, fuck, bitch, damn or something like this, like I don't even know.

What to say.

You know what I'm saying, And I would say say what what you say?

Okay, okay, get it and get it and get.

Uh, where are some of your biggest influences comedically growing up?

I love these transitions.

I'm like, I was like, I feel like all I'm going to do is talk to you about and like play.

You know, and poor they are too, It's just a little different. I'm giving it to you a little easier, a little bit more finesse, so I can walk you out of this.

Yeah.

Biggest influences.

Chris Rock probably like number one comic I saw that was like.

Oh I I I I think I get this the most. You know.

It just resonated with me in a way that I can't do his style, the fact that it was like high level humor but it was still black as hell and like and I don't mean that in a disrespectful way. I just mean like, at that time, they just weren't showing a lot of diversity of what black people are in any space, you know. So it was like all I'm seeing is like death Jam and I comic view

Can do that, you know.

Yeah, So Chris is like the man to me, like he is like the ultimate high. Like when I met him, I was like, oh my god, like I can't called friends.

Like dude, this dude knows like who the fuck I am? You know what I mean? What does that feel like? Crazy?

You know, like this the kid in you that kind of like jumps up and down like I know it, you know, especially like when they say something affirming, you know, like when Chris told me I was like funny and like cood at comedy.

It was like I made it. I knew it, you know, like ah, I.

Wasn't wrong about myself and what I thought, you know, very affirmed. I don't know sometimes if those guys even know. They have to know because they probably went through it in their own space, how like truly affirming that type of shit is and how much it could just keep you like going, yeah, you know what I'm saying.

What's that? What's the what's what's that for you?

Is it like a porn star that was like when they was like girl, you could fuck and you were like you left like krip walking out that bitch.

Hmm, not so much. But I feel like I don't know. I think for me it was it's been different levels. Like I feel like it wasn't necessarily people in the business saying those things to me. I think it was more of the people that I affected and like had like outside because at the time I was in the business the beginning, we had a lot less store signings. So like, again, it's what I liked the like personal interactions, because that's why.

We do it, and that's why I like we're successful. You talk about those fans, I was gonna kill myself.

Figured out my life a little bit.

But you know, in some sense, we're like, oh, you made me feel good because I'm a curvy girl, and like you made me feel like because in the one point important that all girls were super skinny and had.

A really big things, especially why girls, and.

So it was like for me, they were like you made me feel beautiful.

Sorry, I identify. It's okay, you can call me what you need to. It's all right. I like, but for.

For me, it was like it was more of the like the body imaging of it was I wasn't the one like I used to always make the joke like I don't I'm not afraid to eat on set, like I'm not like not starving myself and like you know, so like I feel like in the curvy nation of girls making me like you made me feel like I was BEAUTIFU because you're doing this thing, and so that to me was was like, oh, like, not only do I enjoy what I do, but it's also giving a

But it's like, but I also.

Feel like I understand the chains of what those things and subscriptions also mean.

Yeah, now I explained that it's charity, Like you don't even understand what I'm.

Doing, you know, But it's research, that's what we say.

It's research. If you can build your own comedy.

Special, what would be the lineup and he would be on it?

How many people are? Like how many people do I get? Okay? So, how many are typically in a comedy special? Like four?

Like a lot, like a com like Monique presents the Bad Bitches a comedy it would be like one, two.

Four, there's like four? Yeah. Yeah, I was like, I'm pretty sure it's like four.

So it's too poor first, I'm gonna host it dead or a lot dead or a lot.

Or I'm gonna host it. I'll take that away from you, and you don't count as one.

Prior mm hmm. Because I would love to see it live, Okay.

I wish we saw like my sound Bard where it's like done.

Yeah, prior Dick Gregory okay, tumor would you include Chris Rock mm hmm, okay, just because I get to see it all the time.

Mmmm.

This is your comedy tour. I'm just on it.

We speak things into existence. You know, we can't bring back people the debt, but yeah.

We can do what we do.

What I want to see like early Woman in their career Polt, I'll say early morning. Okay, Okay, what morning now?

Mm hmm.

One more, who would be the final lineup to your comedy special tour?

Red Fox? I don't know who that is. But you don't know Red Fox? Now? Hell no, you got to look at Red Fox, Sanford and Son.

I mean, I know Sanford and Son, but I wouldn't have known that the name of Red Fox the old Man. Yeah, but I didn't know that that. I didn't know that was two and two together. But yeah, I didn't know he was a comedian standing.

He was one of the coldest stand ever.

So you like old school for most of the people that you like, because those are you dead, were live. So I did say that, but those are people I really wanted to see.

Those are all people I wish I was doing it as like people I wish I could see that I didn't get to see. And honestly, I feel like Monique is kind of a ringer because I just can't think of I can't think of.

A woman right now, but I want a woman in there the current now.

So that I was saying, okay, like right now running I'm putting together four. It's gonna be Chris for sure, Dave for sure.

Michael Ja okay, and.

Reggie Conquest, who is a funny, up and coming New York comic that I just think is so fucking hilarious, uh and so different than like what what you typically see out there, and just the way he takes risk and he's super silly, which I enjoy. I enjoy a silly, silly, smart kind of kind of vibe. And he's super silly. So I'll have Reggie open.

Yes, I like it. What celebrity would you roast? And why Shane Gillis because he's my friend.

Okay, so it would be a fun, one deep little bit and we just like have fun fucking with each other.

That's how I him about it was in the roast. Oh yeah, you were hilarious.

Thank you.

I think that it was. How was it doing that rust on Netflix?

Very crazy because I always downplace scenarios and like, I don't know if I do that as a thing. You could therapist me right here, but I don't know if I do that to make things not like overwhelming to me. But I never think something's as big as it is.

Do this thing. So he's like, cool, it's going to be for Netflix. It's a joke festa. Da da Da Da Da da da. I'm like cool. He's like, we could give.

You, you know, if you want to get a couple people together you want to write with and blah blah blah, We'll give you time, blah blah blah.

I'm like great.

So I end up making Gaily who helped write on my show Pause and just know Sports and it's super funny at my homie Radio Rahim, who's just like super insightful, and we just kind of made our little three man group and just started really like digging into the jokes.

And I was like cool, I had jokes ready. I was.

I was headed to La from like another city, and I'm just kind of thinking, like cool, I'm gonna knock this little roast thing out for the Netflix is the jokes Fest, joke Fest. I'm not thinking nothing of it. I'm not even thinking it's gonna be a lot like streamed a lot of Netflix or nothing. I'm just thinking it's for the festival. I don't know if you have a bench of comedy festival, but it's like any other

And then they're like, oh, are gonna stream it live on Netflix.

I'm still not thinking much of it because Netflix live streaming isn't even anything really yet, like that they've done a couple of things here and there. You know. I'm also just like I don't know, I don't know what my brain's doing. But I'm just like, all right, they're gonna stream it on Netflix whatever. And they're like yeah, and it's at the Forum and I'm like sure, cool, fine, get there.

I think this is called departmentalizing things.

But get there and they like bring me to my trailer and I'm kind of looking around and I'm like, wow, they got a lot of like action going on.

Oh yeah, It's like She's like wow, fucking insane.

But I'm like I got all these trailers, like yeah, Wow, this is this big kind of a lot of stuff going on. We had the four this crazy baby, you know. But I'm still plaint in light, just like yeah whatever, not thinking this is Tom Rady of course nothing. So then they're like, yo, do you want to like go up and rehearse, you know, And I'm like, I'm wearing a suit at this point, Like I know, I got I got a suit, but I'm just thinking because they

You see the Kim Kardashian cut out thing.

I was like, oh this fuck, this ain't just like people falling through for some ship.

That's really what I'm thinking.

So I'm like oh, and then I'm looking I'm like, so they gonna people see there, and then all this ship's gonna be like people. So I get off and I see like the stace. I'm like, fuck, why do I know Kevin Hurst? I know all this a rape, but I'm just like fuck. So I get off and I tell my manager, My manager Caroen Baker shout out to her.

I was like, so this is like a big thing, huh. And she was like, what the fuck is wrong with you?

She's like, I mean, now, She's like, what the fuck is wrong with you? This is top, it's it's the roast. There's a red carpet, and I'm like, okay. So then my brain kicks it into like holy shit, you like this in it something You're We're in it, you know, and then that yeah, that So that's how it felt. I just like dumb at first, and then just completely overwhelmed.

Well you did great. I mean you did a great job.

I feel like, is there anything that you feel like you could have maybe done differently or did you feel like you you did what you needed to do.

I was ya, I would have just like played a little bit more like when I was throwing stuff at Bert.

He was safe. He was actually throwing stuff back, but I didn't like go back because.

It was like so much time. It was tight time. It was like you had to kind of do your time and get out of there. Yeah, and I knew I was the most unknown person to people on the roast, Like to the comics, everybody knew me very well, but I knew tell people who were going to be tuning into this roast.

I was like, who was this black dyke right here? You know? She the truth?

I just wanted to like get the jokes the fuck off, you know what I'm saying.

But if I regret, I regret that.

Okay, Well, I think that you did a great job. You definitely made a statement of like, you know, you weren't having sex with all these people watching the Netflix special, but you know you did leave your statement on them, diambolical or not?

Thank you? Thank you?

Is there ever been a joke that didn't land so well? And how did that? How did you Manivula.

Didn't not land?

I've had a joke that didn't get received the way I thought it would be received, And that was a lot for me because it like blew up on the internet a little, and I felt really like fucked up about that, because it was like, that's not how I meant it, and that's not how I felt, but that's how like it just went left on my first specal and it was my first special too, so I was like, oh, why does the controversies having it like my first time out?

Got to work out? The king?

Yeah, but you know that that special three in the Morning on Netflix is the is a.

It just got listed.

By Time as one of the top twenty five specials on Netflix. And I made that special like four or five years ago now, and people just really love that fucking special.

So I still I'm still glad with every part of it.

But I did this joke where I basically say, like, you know, trans people got to stop like shitting on trans women, like trans women to women too.

But then I go in and say, like, and we need them, you.

Know, because like who the fuck is like like stand up for us as women, Like we like the longer version Joe that they've never got Neflix is like how you think we're gonna break in the football and all this shit, Bitch like shut.

The fuck up. And then I was like, uh, you know, they're like our X men.

And then I was like, because if you get in a fight or something outside the club, they'll knock the nigga out and he'll be confused.

Like I found punch. I ain't seen nohing, but I felt that.

And then, uh, people were very upset with me, and uh, gay people and trans people and people of my community just felt like I had totally betrayed them, and like, uh, there, you could google Sam j transphobic right now and tons of I think pieces will.

Come up about it.

But it would hurt me because I really thought I was advocating, but I was just advocating and being comedic, you know what I'm saying. And I just thought it was just so misunderstood and like where I actually was coming from in my heart with the joke, and I think being being black and gay and like all Netflix, I feel like the gay and trans community just wanted a champion and not like but it's like I'm a comic man, like I gotta I gotta do it with

Be open and accepting to that.

And if you really read X men fuckers, x men is the cool name to call them that Xavier calls them mutants is the bad slur name like nigga, but people don't read X Men a door. So also I think it was partly that, but yeah, that that fucked me up a little.

To deal with the conversations again, communication is like I also like with that being said, is like, do you feel like who you are in your community and how

I do think for a while I ran away from it, like cause it was my first special and everyone was.

Yelling at me, and I was like, damn, like I didn't do anything.

I'm about to be canceled before I even get to start off of some shit. Like I was just like, maybe I just shouldn't talk about that at all because it's not worth whatever's gonna come behind it. But I'm a lot like I've grown in the you know, just in comedy and who I am and all that kind of stuff.

So now nah, But at first it was an initial.

Like I'm just like back away from this type of thing for sure.

But now we're getting into it, all right, So this is my favorite pirate going to truth with Texas, Okay, and now we've.

Gone all over the place, this whole thing wasn't truth to hear to this.

It's always truth at private talk with Miss Texas.

But we're a little bit more sexual.

I know we've already kind of dabbled than E've been a really amazing open person and I appreciate you, you know, giving us that here at private talk. So are you ready for him? Yeah, let's dive into it. When did you first realize your sexual identity and what was that journey like for you.

I was like late to that too, I would probably say I was like twenty four when I startd to'd be like, oh, I think maybe like girls. And it was kind of just like a lights on thing. I wasn't like struggling with sexual identity or anything. I wasn't like, oh I hate having sex with men, I don't like this, I want to be gay.

It wasn't any of that.

It just was like I was fucking dudes and I was just like I don't like this, and like I don't know why I don't like this, and like cause I had a boyfriend for a long time, Yeah, but I just didn't care about it in the same way that I felt like all my friends my girlfriends was caring about it. You know, like I had a boyfriend for a long time and I loved him, so it was fine fucking him.

And I think also I was just young.

You know, and I didn't really know anything about myself sexually. And then after we broke up, you know, I was more dating around, not in it like exclusive thing, and I'm just like I don't get this, Like this is not a thing I need to like I need like away my homegirls be talking about this shit Like I just.

But do you feel does that interaction change now with females?

Yes, So I just was like, I don't know what's wrong, but like it's fine, okay, you know what I mean. Also, like I'm living in Atlanta where it's like black gay mecca type shit, and like women are hitting on me and shit, and I'm like kind of interested.

I'm not one hundred percent sure, but I'm like, this isn't turning me off, not.

Making me, it's not making me like whoa, yeah, none of those like alarms are going up. I'm kind of just like, oh for real, hmm okay type shit. And then I just like comedy oddly, I start doing some like testing, so I'm like in the gay chat rooms talking a bitch is like, is this something I could do?

You know what I mean?

Before I like take it out into the world, Like, do I mind that at.

This point, you've never kissed a girl, never done anything. You just had like flirtatious things and like so it's like a little dipping her.

Toe into the thing.

Okay, so I'm gonna dip my toe in person. I dip my toe in That's how I do.

So then that tone never came out the whole foot.

Yeah, you got dunked.

So then I was like, I'm gonna go out on a date. And one of my best friends who I grew up with, my homegirl. I was kind of telling her, like girls keep hitting on me.

She's like, you better try that ship.

I don't know what made her say that, but I was like, okay, maybe I should type shit. And so I I see this, uh craiglist.

This is craiglist shit.

I see a ad from a girl female I'm female form female on Craiglist. And it was just like a girl was just like I like anime and like chill it and I'm just looking for like cool, chill people.

And she was like a black girl to like anime. I want to chill, And I was like, I want to chill. So you like anime porn and actually I don't watch. I don't like no cartoon porn. I don't like no fake three D. I don't understand that, but neither. This is not my thing.

But but you subscribe to.

It, that's the one I should subscribe to.

You.

They probably need the most help.

No, oh wrong, okay, no, like who are the cartoons?

When the fuck is that money going? Like I don't even know anying about it, so I can't really speak on it.

But no, so she she So I hang out with the girl and I'm like, oh cool, Like this vibe was cool. I think it's I think that's why I like pop up And I'm kind of like, all, I'm all in tight tight, you know, it's like we're gonna do it.

I'm gonna just do it.

Did you start to make out or you the one who did the first move?

Did you kiss?

I think she kissed me first, but I was like, once we was kissing, it was like we kiss so you fucked, so we fucked?

Went dad or her?

That's the first time you've done anything with the first time anything, so were you like navigating through that, We're like do you were like, I don't know if this is I haven't done it, but I'm just I'm just gonna figure it out because you're also a female, so we know what we like.

Yeah, And also because I was like the boy one, I was like, ain't no wrong to be looking like you don't know what you're doing?

Now?

Is that identified in the beginning of like the roles that are being played, it's identified by how I dress like that and just how you okay, yeah, just how I show it?

But also like that is how you are, like how you show up, but it's like sexually sometimes that role and they may not be and.

Not in black households. That's we don't do that. You know, how you show up? How you better be? We don't pay that questions.

Then you know, maybe once you're married for a long time you could turn over and be.

Like stick you better you better show up how you show up? Correct? Right?

So, so did this at this point because this is also you don't know what's going on, and you also have never done anything, and I.

Don't know if it's good or bad. I never even like that.

But this is also like exactly. So is mouth things.

These aren't like nos, just off the fingers mouthed.

So she sat on your face or just open her legs.

I don't think she sat on my face. So she you just opened her legs.

I think I just was like that, Yeah she opened her legs. Yeah yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, I think she's going back right now.

How you doing?

It's going back to the memories of.

Like, let me really tell the truth. I know.

That's like I know you want to do don't Lieeah, yeah, I don't think.

I don't think she sat on my face?

Okay, And so what was the first taste, Like, like, were you convinced at that point like this is where I should be absolutely, because you're like this is more for me than what the man.

It was like every time I was like I was, yes, she was like reacting to it, and I was like, oh I want to do this to mad like that's crazy I want to make.

I was like this is nuts. Absolutely for sure, for sure.

Okay, do you think comedians are better and bad?

So?

Why?

Oh?

I think we're just very thoughtful people. Is that what you're thinking?

We're thinking a lot, We're thinking a lot, we're considering a lot.

We're analyzing a lot. We're very observant. We listen.

Well, all right, you know you know what I mean, because we're a kind of picking up on ship, you know, so I think that helps.

Craziest place you've ever had sex.

A parking lot outside like a like an outdoor like parking lot by club.

When it was like letting out.

All right, I'm chill, freaky question. I don't like that you asked me that because anything I say is corny.

Bro, it's not that means maybe maybe you can spice up your life.

I don't know.

I mean that's all like a lot to me. All right, let's do freaky questions.

All right, what's the nastiest, freakiest thing you've ever done in bed?

Oh? No, what is it?

Come on, we want the truth, give it to us.

I like I like x that I speak French.

And we were bigger like a like of of our guard, like like like of our guard like video type like we were just fucking around, make it freaky videos and fucking and ship and I fucked with that the open and not just whoa.

But it's not like she got some girls, just jesus.

But it's not like Champagne in it and like I fucked her with it and then we drank it and then we fun.

I think that's like a spitting them off. Now that's freaky. So I think I would say, yeah, that was the most like we do stuff again. I don't want to do none of this week. I'm not, man, go ahead, what's wrong? Go ahead? What are you pouting about?

Because you're not gonna feel like none of my stuff is freaky?

But why like for me is it a I am not a judge or jury over here, So what you do is what you do.

All I could do is stimulate you to make it.

It's just like I was putting you on the spot, like YO, tell me like the funniest joke you told.

I know you lay it.

I'm like, yeah, okay, I know it's like and I would still be like, I'm fucking funny.

And if you didn't think it was funny, fuck you too the funny. But it's all good times.

I don't feel like for me, it's like, let's say this, I got into porn for a reason and my freakiest times is what I did import because it was a comfortable and safe space. So my personal freakiness. You may not think it is, but I am freaky.

But who knows? You know? This is a safe space? Sure, all right?

Would you say you're more dominant or submissive in the bedroom or does it depend on the vibe? Have you ever obviously you exude this dominance you talk about this strap on and like being that one whatever, But has there ever been a time where it's been a switched role in a sense and not where you've been strapped on but or be But like, I.

Think I definitely have like a more submissive side, but I have to like really fuck with you for you to get that.

So would you.

Be in a relationship with someone who is more dominant than you in a sense of where like you were getting fucked maybe not all the time.

But half and half like with straveling possibly.

Whatever y'all's comfortability was, because I feel like there's different levels, right, But what do.

You mean by like just defying fucked? I get for you?

I think sometimes when you say fucked, like there's a power move for you, right, And I think that that's why there's a disconnect of why you think your saltiness behind what you're facialist right now? But as far as like being damned by your partner at certain times, and that could be just being fucked.

But that doesn't mean there's anything to that. No, But I'm saying, like, do you mean he's getting fingered?

Do you mean it could be That's what I'm saying at the level.

The levels could be far.

It could be like I don't know your boundaries, so I don't know you're sometimes you could be a switch hitter, right, so maybe you can be fucked not okay, So then that's your truth, so that that's what thing is. So maybe it's fingers, maybe it's dominant of how she speaks to you, or whatever my thing is. I don't mind that sense of like, is there ever a time where a partner could domn you in a sexual sense where you could be submissive and still get off to that.

I if I guess I'm being dombed, Like if I'm being dombed, but my ego still being a stroke, like if it's like you gonna it's good and you're gonna do what I say.

Okay, Okay, So you still need the validation of knowing that you're still the dominant one in the scenario, even if you're being fucked.

We don't have to have a whole other session.

After this because doctor Texas has a lot of I don't I don't like this, but uh, speak your truth, though, say with your chest.

Don't sneaky strap on.

You don't sniggy strap on me.

I guess, I guess, I guess, but.

Don't I guess? And why?

Like I walked you into a corner, I wanted to be No, you wouldn't walk me into a corner.

But I mean, you're you're a sling. Your assessment is correct because I still want to feel like the thing. So no, no part of you.

And again this is just the hypothetical least not even that I'm the thing. But at least that's why that's like maybe it is on the thing, because it's.

Like, yeah, that it made you dominant.

So now let me ask you this, And I'm a pathetical question, right, So what if I and I fucked you with this strap on and I fucked the ship out of you? Would you allow that this is like me? It's not this is me putting like you said, like, it's the sense of me putting on a strap on without your knowledge, but knowing that I'm being in a sexual setting with you, right strap happen? Yes, So I'm doing that. That's why I'm saying sneaky because it's like I'm not just being like, hey, I'm gonna go put

I've never. I can't say it's impossible.

I would really really really really really have to be fucking with you.

Okay, So for you at that point, it's because it's because it's it's more.

And then I don't know how much I would even how long I would be able to entertain it.

Okay, But that.

Speaks again a lot because of the sense of that means.

For you, you.

Could never have loss of self control to make you allowed. But I because yeah, but not if I was in control of the You have to be in control your own on anybody's factor, is what I'm saying.

That's probably very true, and.

That I mean, that's not something that's not uncommon in myself included like you know, in other ways. Is like if I would say too, it's like there's people who are good fucking me, right, But it's also I allow you to be able to fuck me, not only physically, but mentally, to un tap the wild or diabolical whatever side that comes out of those things, so the freaky comes out. I'm just asking, Yah, see where we're at. Do you like dirty top?

Yes? Do you like it being given or do you like to receive it? Okay? Does that make it? Yes?

If you had to rank your oral game on a scale of one to ten.

What would it be. It's hi past ten, past ten.

Oh, so it's off the Richter scale.

That's how confident.

Okay, it's out there and the it's like cloud, you don't know where the is.

Okay, worst hookup story you've ever had?

Yeah, so that was I was.

I was.

I was.

I don't want to say I was down bad, but I was in a space and I was I was engaging in activities with with a lady. I shouldn't have been for a multitude of reasons.

Okay, was this like a cheating situation?

No?

Just why in a situation ship that you were working like this?

Ain't it? And I noticed saying it?

And I shouldn't be over here doing this because on no level is this what I should be over here doing. And yeah, and so she invited me over, and I come over, and I was coming from some type of comedy thing that was sponsored by Jack Daniels. So I had a little book baggy thing with full of bullshit Jack Daniels.

Were you Jack Daniels That.

I don't drink Jack Jam's, but I was drinking. But I don't drink. I can't whiskey scotch. I call those things like world like war liquors, like for the veterans, Like I don't know, I just you gotta really go through some shit to do, like yeah, the way that shit hit, I'm like, I haven't lived enough life for whatever this is supposed to be for. So I come over and she tells.

Me it's all good. Come by, Da Da Da da.

And I get there and there's a dude sitting on the couch. So I'm like, oh, that must be her cousin or some shit.

He just watch see. He like what up?

I'm like, what's up? He like she in a room and I'm like okay. So I go in her room and she closed the door and she like, that's my baby daddy. She had a kid too, so kids in the other front room. So like the living rooms here, there's a front room here, there's a kitchen here, and then her bedroom's here, so her kids in that room in his like playpen or whatever whatever cage she had this kid in.

So I'm like, that's red flag never won.

I'm like, what it was latest fuck for the kid to be in the place. I think he might have been in his crib, but he was just up. But anyway, I'm like, that's your baby daddy, and she's like, yeah, he about to leave.

Da da da da da. They would been. They had been fighting. She was like this nigga da da dada. He been fighting, like you know. And I'm like, holy shit, did she did she introduce you to baby daddy? No, I just said with something, thinking he was just somebody.

And then came in the room and she starts breaking down to me they've been fighting. He about to go, and I'm like, I'm out of here, bitch, you know what I mean, And she's like, no, don't go. And my homi had dropped off. This is like early comedy. I'm broke, you know what I'm saying. I'm all the way kind of out of town a little bit with it. Like I'm in Cambridge Ways, out of Boston. I was like, chilling, was gonna fuck get up in the morning and get

I think, so okay, because that that is the whole other child.

But even if it was uber, I couldn't afford it, okay, but I.

Think it was.

I think it was you don't have a lot of options basically regardless of yeah, get out.

So I'm like I'm bouncing. She's like, no, please, he really about to leave. We good? We chilling d D. So like I'm like, cool, I like, take off my pants. I'm laying in the bed.

We like watching TV, just like talking and ship. She's kind of like touching on me. Whatever, it's still there, He's I guess still there. Like at some point I'm just like, whatever is about to happen with this dude is about to happen with this dude. Then the next thing I know, this motherfucker banging on the door. Boom boom, boom, boom, boom, y'all fucking in there. I'm like, what the fuck? He was like, he's heating the door hard. He's like, you got a dyke in there? Are you about to fuck

I got through Jack Daniel's.

I'm just like, I'm like, yo, what the She's like, don't worry about So she comes up.

It's like, fuck you.

You needn't get the fuck out.

He's like, fuck you, bitch. D She comes back and I'm on close the door, like, don't worrybody. He about to leave.

I'm now I'm in my pants. Time she went out and came back. I'm up, I got my pants back on. I'm sitting up on the bed I got I'm putting on my shoes. I'm like, nah, I'm not doing this with you, bitch. So boom, this motherfucker kicks in the door of the bedroom and he's like, bitch, I'll kill you in your so as he goes towards her, I just walk around him and walk out.

So I walk out. I walk out the work. I don't know you enough to save you. I need to go, Ready to go. I walk out the for at door. I'm standing on the fuck like street. I'm blowing my nigga up.

They not answering. I'm blowing them up. I'm like, fuck, what the fuck?

I heard them arguing with Da Da.

He's like, bitch, what the fuck you like you bout a guy here? If I call the police on you, you know you're on probation type shit, I'll get your fucking ass locked up. He's like, you try to get me back, you stupid bitch. So d d Son he he he runs out the crib, like out the back.

Then he run back in. Of course, so he goes out. He's out.

So I'm like, cool, this shit's over with this.

Hope we don't run off. You know what I'm saying.

He ain't coming back to this motherfucker. It's all gravy.

He came back. Be back in the room. Your pans are off. I'm back. I'm back at you. No, we in the living room.

Were in the living room, uh like, were in the living room chilling and we sit on couch and and she's like, please stay like it ain't that.

He gone Sa Da Da Da Da blah blah blah blah blah whatever whatever. Were talking.

She talked about how Ki she said, all this shit she feels about him. This nigga comes out of the baby room, like he went around, came through the baby window.

It was in there.

I think by the time I even came back in the house because she had to convince me to come back in from.

The street first. So we was there. Bro. So she's saying like fuck him, da da da, and he can bust on the paper. I'm like, I'm bat nigga.

I was like, yo, this is a this is.

Fun a hook up word.

So she really calls the police this time because she's like, I'm not playing with you.

So he's like, you really try to get me back. I hate you. I'm never coming back. So he leaves. So I stayed and then I left the next morning.

So yeah, but like you were over it already. Yeah, that's traumatic.

I felt bad for you.

That's a lot crazy. I mean, that's a lot. It was. It was nuts. It was nuts.

There was a lot of times I didn't know what was gonna happen, but I had just I had already just done so much.

And then at some point it was like you might as well just hit bro. Let's be honest.

If you if you had a you could have afford the uber, you would have been out the first time the first.

Oh absolutely, absolutely my post. That's the bullshit. My poverty kept me there for real. Hey, but it maybe stronger? It did it? Did it? Did? That's work? You know what I mean? Well, that's truth with Texas. You know we have ran on a sketchy note. You know what I'm saying. But I want you to ask missus Texas two questions. What you got from me? Damn?

I put you on the spot. You did so well. You know, you broke it down. You really played truth to Texas. The whole game too.

Two joints. Okay, I want them to be good me too. Don't make me dead it real quick? No no, no, no, no, I don't want to. I want you to have to think. That's why this is hard. Think Gemini is tough. Okay.

You see how I didn't even do you dirty. I didn't even ask you about your situation you did.

I appreciate that you're a good person. I really appreciate that. A what.

Because you you are having sex and being open and being sexual in like public space.

I would that.

Feels public, right, would you call a camera crew people looking at shit kind of public?

Right? The world sees me? Five?

Yeah, What does privacy look like for you?

What is privacy for you?

Privacy for me is my personal life. For me is I give so much of myself like for work and like sexual things like on you know, film and stuff like that. I hadn't shot porn in over five like plus years, and then I did my own stuff for my only fans, So I do that.

Types of stuff.

But it's like doing it my in my own way, right, So like I feel like it's intimacy. I think intimacy to me is not a part of porn. Porn is more sexual and like very like animalistic and primal, where it's like that's why I like make you know, the joke of like I'm a sexual athlete, like I'm doing a job, but there's no emotion, there's no like that where it's like in my personal time there's emotion and there's more like feeling towards and no one's watching you.

The intimate sex times, intimacy just period, Yeah, intimacy period period. I feel like for me, porn for myself isn't intimate, it's sexual, where my personal life is more intimate and personal.

I will follow, but I don't want it to be my second question.

You can have follow then okay, so then do you could you ever see yourself? Because you know, like with reality TeV and stuff like that, people are giving away that intimacy. Is that intimacy so sacred for you that you could not do that?

You know?

I've been asked a lot to be on reality TV things and whatever.

For me, I feel like I could.

Play more of a producer roles because for me, then now you're really being more intimate into my private life, and that's something that I'm not really willing to give up.

For me, is I like my private space. I like to allow people. Even with my podcast, it's allowed me to be more vulnerable, but also like talk about my personal times that I wouldn't have to talk about within porn and those things like that, because I don't talk about those things with my coworkers because what's the point. We're fucking right. So for me is I like to keep the the Alexis and the Alexis Texas separate. Like before, I didn't feel like there was ever There wasn't a divide.

Okay, okay, so now this is I got to ask a question to get to the question, just understand something. How did you grow up? Like did you grow religious? Did you grow up conserved? Like?

How did you grow up so religious?

I wouldn't say like we're god based, like we have a got you know, I mean, but it wasn't like one religion or the other. What I liked is that we did go to church, but it was more of like like like Easter and likes like those types of things where it was like celebratory type of moments, not throughout the year, within that time. Like I also like growing up, I took a religious class and so I like kind of try to find my faith within those things. I feel like with all of that, I'm more spiritual

So yeah, okay, so have you ever felt because people, oh, if you're a porn star, like you're just letting me a fuck you, that's crazy, you're just getting like used up and that's nuts, and you're just run through trash.

Right, what I feel like you came into I don't know how you came into it. Bad filu.

You're just which it was kind of like show themselves and empowered and it's doing what they want in porn.

Have you ever felt like that moment?

Have you had that space where like you're like, I'm just being used right now and like this is fucked.

I think that people want me to feel that way.

I think that people, you know, have misconstrued Again. Why again, even when I go back to like communication and with my show, is that you know, communication is a powerful thing. You know, we may agree, we may disagree, but there's a common ground of what real is real and what is Everybody's the truth? Right for me, I would say, just like every business, do you feel used in moments because people get over on you and certain things because.

You don't know things.

Yes, but it's used as my body have always been willingly known.

What I signed that moment is for you important, like because I think people would assume it's a sexual moment, but I imagine it's.

Not for me. It's more.

The empowerment of what I gained from my sexuality. My sexuality gave me a space to kind of encumber the woman that I was meant to be. I feel like sex to me is very powerful, but not in the sense of a diabolical way, but really like educational as well as like in tune of like what your needs and wants are and like bottom line, and I'm very against spiritual and empathetic of or like just an impath of life and energy and what that all brings is that we all are made up of the same things

Your craft, you kind of just figure that out.

And that's kind of what I did in my in my field, and my thing is that it just allowed me to figure out who I wanted to be sexually as a female and like a feminine