FARRAH ABRAHAM

Yeah, I am so happy to be here. I'm very excited for you to be here as well. It's one of those things that you know, we've known each other, we've met each other, but we didn't really have like a good conversation because we're always so busy doing your own things, and now you're doing comedy and it's like a whole other lane. So I think that's so exciting, and I'm excited that you're in town. Yeah, I get to come to your show tomorrow. So let's talk about how you've even got into comedy.

Yeah, first of all, I'm so excited that you're coming, and I know everyone else is, so let's have a good time.

But how did I get into comedy?

So I got to be a celebrity guest for Day of Attel, who is a comedian who's like doing Netflix specials.

He's like on a big tour right now.

I love Davie Okay, yes, it all started basically with Davittel and I got fired. I kept getting fired from teen Mom okay the show, and yeah, I started getting sag checks when I was fired, and I.

Was like, you know, what where is this from?

I'm like, I need to like actually like, go learn about comedy, because then every time I get fired and rehired on Team Mom, it just was so hard for me to do it until like I really got fired the last time and these trucks came in and then I was sag and I was like, I need to learn about this. And so I came back out to LA and my friends were like sponsoring some big comedians like Joe Rogan and a bunch of other people, and

Falling asleep to these men.

Okay, I wasn't enjoying myself.

It wasn't your type of comedy.

Yeah, And I think, like that's what has taken me a very long time.

I also watched there was like a couple of seasons.

Of Marvelous Missus maisl that was like on Amazon, and it was like a woman's journey to like being a stay at home mom but then getting a divorce, then like a working woman on her own. And I think that helped me take my life and then put it out there like facts can be funny, life journey stories can be funny. I don't have to be.

Like I was on a Having Been del podcast and he.

Was like, okay, fair show me a joke. Two men walk into the bar, go and I'm just like, not a cheesy, funny person. I even love dry, dark humor. I like just like, yeah, keep it like element of surprise, keep it fun, keep a chilly yeah. So I don't know. Some people have tons of marketing behind their comedy, and maybe that's why they're like a big name comic, but when you go to see them, you're not really intrigued

Thanks to ketamine.

Okay, good for you.

I feel like, you know, it's good sometimes and you just have to like you have to see you're growing up and you grew up you know, you know, on TV, and you had to go through struggles and like everybody but yours was more glorified at certain times, and it's like sometimes they're more shin in a certain things and

But you're doing You're doing a great job. Yes, So with.

Being on team Mom, Like how did that shape your life and your career? Like going like moving after that because it was such a you know, it was a big part of your life and how you you know, have a platform today kind of and where did that after being fired because of only fans and how did that kind of shape everything?

Oh my god? And then now all my cast members who are on have an only fan. So like all the all the interviews on the press for today, they were like, so all your cast members have ofs and like what's going on? Like why aren't you on the show?

Did you feel like because you felt like you owed something to them?

Or is it never owed? I definitely don't. They didn't.

They didn't give you like an out.

But at those times, it's like sometimes before you know, you don't know, not that it says no better, but it's like it's kind of what you know, so it's like that's right, and I mean so you go back to kind of what you know. So it's like you almost feel a kind of I don't know, service to something of that.

There's a pull in a tug sure during those times, I think I had an advocate. The last time I went back to work with them, I like, I don't know they thought I was like dying and having hyperbody tension, but like that's the last time I ever used birth control.

It was like basically killing me and I had to give my like.

Doctors documents because I'm like I can literally have a heart attack or like something's wrong with me. I'm like on cancer machines right now. They don't really know what's up. And I'm like, so if I come back to work, like, no one can attack me, no one can sneak up on me. Like I have PTSD, I'm on like four different medications. My doctors are trying to figure out what's going on. And so you're like, okay, if you're not taking note, I'm giving all the legal precautions.

So I can't go back to work.

I've said who not to have around me because of criminal behavior and my advocate. It's like a weird dynamic, but I can if I just could be open. I was like severely, like sexually assaulted, and I was having a director of the Right Victim Center oversee my work, oversee my medical stuff. I mean like they really have like a whole team to get victims back together. Okay, And I was really fortunate because I guess there's like a huge list and I was very fortunate to have

She even wrote up the email for me to.

Go back to work because she's like, I know, it means a lot to you to just go back and act normal and go to work, and like, if we just wrote this out and made sure they like consentually did all this stuff, it's safe. It's okay for you. So I go to work. She thinks everything's good. I think everything's good, and then I realized they allow the criminal behavior to show up and surprise me and then start having like four people attack me.

They had to pull the cameras off.

And it was just like so obscene that people who basically raised me as a woman from sixteen to whatever I was thirty, then that that would keep continuing to happen purposely. And when you go report back, yeah, you go report back to your advocate advocates from the show. Oh no, advocate from the rape vics of I was like, let's see if you can go back to work, and that's when I learned, like, what why do I keep

Yeah, so yeah they got really.

Do you feel like after those things happened that they still made you look kind of like paint you to be the like the bad guy?

Oh yeah for sure. I mean like the one liners that were on the commercials. It was crazy. Yeah, at that time.

It's it's unfortunate.

It sucks because it's like at those times you realize when people invest your time and your livelihood and all

Fed to the wolves almost.

Yeah, you know, So it sucks that you had to go through that when you're expressing what you want and you know things and.

People watching, yeah, like therapists, doctors, and then you're like so is that your final straw at that you know, Yeah, that has really been the final straw. And I kind of stopped years ago when they would be like, oh, we're family, this family.

And I think because I had such a.

Toxic there's like books that I have for everyone out there with mommy issues. I healed myself, but but.

There's I think that's you know, it's a that's a good thing I think for sharing, you know, I mean, like a lot of people don't and yeah, people can't talk about it. You know, you can make jokes a way whatever, but some people do and they don't ever get healed themselves. I think it's a good space to you know, let it out.

So I had this book called Daughters Healing from Narcissistic Mothers, and I kept wondering, like even so like the whole family dynamic thing of like my mom saying she loves me and all these weird things growing up that were so out of alignment, so not where love comes from. And you know, God bless everyone with like, you know, disorders.

And I think it's you know, everybody's journey is different, and that's why everybody's pictures isn't always the same. And I think that again, the ones that kind of are the loudest about things or being the most vocal about things that people at the time also so weren't talking about mental health and.

Like what that meant, or like even just feelings.

People don't like your feelings and you're just like, well no, because you know, especially in that generation, like you know, people weren't taught what to do with feelings, and those

At all, or they nouralize it in our society for sure.

When I was like sequestered at up, Oh sorry, I don't know if I'm like I'm having my own meeting. When I was sequestered twenty eight days in a trauma recovery center, I could not work, I couldn't do anything.

I couldn't have talked to my daughter.

What age was this? So this was thirty? Hold on twenty twenty one? I'm guessing it was. Yeah, it was twenty twenty one, we're hold on? Did it maybe? So four years ago? Oh my god, time was flying guys. My life is so great. It's flying by now. So I ended up getting attacked for like another time because of the commercials from teen Mom. Okay, it was like severe and when.

You say attacked by your castmates or by people like the like outside, so.

Like right down the street from my house, I went up to dinner with two people and they like picked me out of the two people, and like it ended up I ended up being handcuffed by security off property. I like left, I was trying to leave if they were like mocking, like I don't know what yeah, I don't know what was going on, but that's definitely not what to do when you show up to work and

On the ground, and it was like insanity.

Then they're telling everyone that I hit them, I did all this while I'm on the ground, and they've cuffed themselves like broad daylight kidnap me. They're saying all these lives and gaslighting. And I think when I went to this trauma center for this, like that was like the last draw I couldn't And so this is like the weird thing I couldn't keep from all these assaults and all these things that kept happening and stacking up and

Like people, and I was like scared.

That was just like the catalyst of seeing like when I had to do like all this journaling in the center when I was there, When I think back to all these things, it was just like, why was I around the gas lighting that we normalized in society that was always like so sensitive? After my assault, I just like couldn't find the words like.

Why am I so sensitive to this?

But then I like went to the trauma center learned all these words like for what I was dealing with. I was so uneducated about what we need to know, and then I knew, like, Okay, this is the game of life that all of us are living in. I never needed all that on me, And now I see we normalize everyday gaslighting and that's like why some people, like for press are like, oh, fake news, but it's actually gaslighting news, not correct probably the reverse situation, and

Into what I was turned into.

And then when I just like reclaimed my life and so I do think, you know now looking back, and nothing's done, nothing's done in court right now. But I do think all the narcissists, I do think all the gas lighters. I do think all the abuse that I went through, because if I never had enough of it, we all have our own low in life. Once you've had enough, you will go get the help, you will go conquer your.

Own identity and have the biggest self love.

And like you're like, ah, you know, it's just like.

This moment of you and you and it's just like, oh, it's a rebirth.

Yeah, it's a great feeling.

It's all those things.

And again it's like not a lot of people are willing to go inward because it's ugly and it's scary. It's all those things, and that's why it's like some people have to hit the rock bottom, and everybody's rock bottom is a little bit different.

But it's so much more self rewarding.

Doing the work and kind of seeing like why these things are happening, because it's like, you know, it's unfortunate and we can be like you know, you said you have to take accountability for certain things and what we go through. But it's also like awareness, you didn't know any better schools, you weren't given to these things where it's like if you weren't putting certain situations, outcomes could

Yeah, it is. It is like a sad situation and luckily, like my daughter doesn't need to go to that low, low extent.

But that's also part of like gossip, being you know, a great mom and like having those things where like breaking the generational curses and really doing the work. And like you said from your you know, parents and how you were shown love wasn't what you needed and how you needed it. Yeah, and it was chaotic in a situation. So you were really adamant about changing that and you know, making that a big thing. And I think that that's a beautiful thing and should be you know, celebrated.

Yeah, I mean I celebrated every day.

Girl. What is your relationship with you with your parents now?

So, I like, because of my daughter just being like so anti toxicity when I don't know mes like toxic add some more, my daughter is like so no toxicity. So that means like she blocks all my parents, all of her extended family. She's never had an issue blocking them. It's crazy. I've always had an issue like, oh but you yeah, out are the tools verse. So I didn't have something to go back on. So it's like, you know me, it's like I got to retrain my brain.

But yeah, I was blocking my family.

I unblock them because truly, I just let everyone do their own life now and I don't have to respond to text messages, Like it's okay to have things sent to me now. I am such a capable able person to deal with that now. But I don't respond. I'm just never gonna, you know, get more tickets to the circus anymore.

It's your boundary. Yeah, and that's and that's okay. Sometimes I feel like it's more power. It's you have more power. Not blocking is what I like to do because I like to see it. So it's like I can choose to respond to it or now I like to. But I also know the playing field, right, Yeah, I know where you're coming from. If you see that we're in a better place or not like things like that. For me, it's like it gives more power and then yeah, you know, sometimes not answering is powerful too.

Yes, I have to say, though I do test myself by like unblocking everyone whatever. I'm like, I truly I like a challenge now, and I'm like, okay, I need to set with how I feel about these people. And even though like people who fired me are coming to my comedy show, like, I'm just like I can sit with that. Yeah, I do to make you feel yeah, you know, I'm just like I don't know what to say, but I'm just like, well, I don't know why you're

These are public places for sure.

I'm like, you know, I don't have any more like control trips. I think I used to have like power control tripping like dynamics, and I feel like, let me let go. Okay.

Yeah, So it's kind of like said, any of.

Your co stars that now have these only fans, have they reached out for collaboration?

No, would you?

I know I consider any of them.

I don't think so.

I think I've made everybody enough money over there.

Okay, so do you that means you don't speak to any of them.

So I did start unblocking some of them, Okay, Okay, that's the first step. I did decide to come back out to New York and do one of their podcasts to like support Okay, yeah, you know, she made a whole big deal out of me blocking her, and I feel like where I'm coming from is I don't care about making drama about if I blocked you or not, like I needed a break. I needed to like, I

And I think a lot of them. Again, you mentioned like seeing some people in their stuck.

Points or like yeah, and I see it real with these moms.

So it's easier to I feel like, kind of like you said, let go, let it go in a sense, because it's like you have to meet people sometimes where they are and then at that point it's like when we get to those over a thing, it's like I can't make you want to do anything.

You have to want it for yourself.

So you know what, peace is great over here. I love some peace.

So with all that being said, what is one thing that you've left in your past, like a crazy Hollywood story that doesn't involve you necessarily, but something that like that was you were part Like you've talked about, you know, the whole thing right now with your friend and coming out, But like, what's something that's kind of crazy that maybe didn't get picked up by the press.

Oh my god, I don't think any of my wildest moments were not caught in the press.

And I think that because I think a lot of people like to act.

Wild and stir my life up to get pressed. I do feel like the wildest saying I like truly to stay that taught me a lot. Was when and I like, oh god, was when I was literally like hanging at the pool at the Beverly Hilton. I supposed to have a lovely day. Mark Cuban was there are all these people just chilling and I don't know, but the person like so my friends inviting me and my daughter and my girlfriends were like doing their own thing. But the guy who they were there seeing.

Ended up having such an issue with me.

That he I don't know, was like just your existence being there or like something like something happened, like was being said.

So I wasn't okay with how he was like man handling my friends. Kay. He just had drank away too much.

It was like getting insane and I was just like, no, we're not doing that, Like what if someone did that to you, Like you need.

To stop that.

Anyways, I needed to go take a break from it. And I just was like, you know what, I'm gonna go outside, like this is your friend and like I've had a lovely day.

This is like a bad ending to the day. And my daughter wasn't there obviously anymore.

I was like nighttime, I was outside getting air a police officer oddly who I knew in Beverly Hills when I was living there, who also.

Helped me because someone had stolen a car of mine. He just like says, hi to me, We're cordial. He goes in the hotel. Then I walk in because now I'm.

Like, okay, this is great. I like the other obserts. Yeah, I'm calm now, and all the security and the police officer who I knew now were basically saying They're going to take me to jail for what I don't even know. And then I go, okay, so you locked me out of those doors. My cell phone, my bag's in there. I will be getting that and I will be leaving, like I don't even know what is going on. So the longe of the short is they said I was trespassing, but I was a customer all day. Yeah, they had

They heard, because once you say it's like they disbelieve it doesn't matter like you said, like this stuff comes out to be untrue whatever, Like why do you feel like you're targeted for all these lawsuits and like things of people coming at you?

So yeah, I think it was like an LA thing.

Is that like why you moved?

And like, oh yes, I am never habitually been like orchestrated from security like in LA. That's why I refuse, Seriously, I refuse to work in LA right now, Like it's wild. Everyone's like I need to move to LA to get work. I'm like, now I've started in Iowa, i can do it anywhere. And so yeah, I come to New York and I'm just in and out and I just I'm so much happier. I like New York mindsets like for sure, just work and have a good time and like.

Do what you love.

I love it here. That's why I moved here too. I agree.

Was there anybody you were pleasantly surprised that, like we're shocked by when you did start an OnlyFans and kind of like doing more adult stuff in the beginning.

I mean, just the people who saw me from like sixteen and pregnant straight up.

But you would think, I feel like in those people unfortunately, Like you would think that those would be like the ones waiting in line, because that's kind of what most people were, like wait until you were legal enough.

To do that kind of thing.

So I wouldn't say, Oh, I don't know, but is there anybody like a family?

They were like crazy, I guess coming from something that is such like, you know, a clean thing of being, like is it really good?

I guess in a sense, but I guess yeah, sixteen And look I was talking about this to a lot of people today. Uh. They were bringing up like sixteen and pregnant episodes teen mom and I'm sorry that was like soft core porn, like the pregnancy posset. I'm sorry, Like I'm I know that there's naked poses on a line or o app okay that are the same exact pose of how people like saw me giving birth straight up. Like so I don't know, but I look back and I'm like, what direction was I really going in? Like

Needed it on TV.

I just kept working.

Who's been one of the rudest TV personalities or celebrities that has come across through your career.

I you know, I don't even want to pick on anyone, but I'm just answering it. Honestly.

I was actually taking back when I was at an award show for like MTV or something, and it was like the Music Awards I believe Ellen Degeneress was hosting that year or something. Well, anyways, she ended up being by us. I was like, oh my god, I kind of want to say hi to her because she led that it was like such an approachable show that she was, you know, having, and it was like cold shoulder, and I think I was just like hmm, But then it's

I'm still like hmm.

I don't really know if anyone was really picking on her, but she was not welcoming when everyone was talking and being welcoming.

So I think, yeah, Ellen degenerous, what is.

Dating like for miss Farrah at the moment? I know you're just about to start this comedy tour, but what's dating like?

Yeah? I thought I would do comedy and hopefully date through that. I am single for real. And my last boyfriend literally asked me out at a stroke club is.

This the one that's going to be performing on?

And ironically I did not know something about where I am doing my comedy stand up at. I was like here, I know, I know I was talking about like a boyfriend. It's like, oh, well, over boyfriends. But I broke up with him like a week later. It's I just I think I wanted to just delete a dating app in the Stroke club with him and be like, oh I met my person because.

He wanted to do that.

I just wanted to check something off your list, right, Yeah, I.

Haven't done this, boom okay. And then I did a week of it. We tried it and we did like a one week anniversary dinner. Oh no, and if that's redfly, that's never gonna work out. If you can do that, yeah, And I made him like get me roses and all this stuff that I always do.

I love love bombing.

I like love keeping the love bombing going, which is so bad, so toxic, a toxic okay, And like semi gafs, we don't even have to meet. We'll just have like a long distance relationship that is something toxic. That I do sounds like an only Fans page in real life, Like you know, I'm just like it's so crazy, And I do have to say, I think only fans policy is for like literally changing my life and kind of like getting me to probably just just like date better and like be aware.

Of things as far as like maybe like raising standards or what do you mean by life?

Yeah, Like I just feel like from the date that I met on a dating app and when we were like at the Gentleman's club and he asked me to be his girlfriend there, I feel like it really just like was like hmm, like how does this work? Like I just it's like you're throwing money and all these girls you brought me with you, like you know that I get paid to come to clubs. I just it puts into perspective a little bit of like am I

But have you ever thot a sense of like because I get what you're saying. I think it plays with my mind and I you know, I get it because for me being in the adult industry, for you know, seventeen years, like you're a perspective of certain things, you start to mind shift, right because it's like one way and then it's like men are all this way or

Work in those things.

You're comfortable in those settings, so they're like, oh, she's open minded. So it's like not in a sense of negative and a money grab, but a sense of oh, I've found someone who's smart, business minded, all these things, and she I can look at girls that shake ass and she likes girls that are attractive too.

When ye, because that's how I send Because I mean he did say that, yeah, straight up with saying that, he was like, oh, I couldn't do this with my ex wife, dada YadA yah.

And that again proves the point of like being with people who just openly saying what you need and want and not being shamed because his ex wife probably was like, oh, you're a pig.

're this whatever.

It's like he may not even fuck these people. He may want to, yeah, but at the end of the day, it's like we have needs and once for a lot of things. But that's why it's like it gets puts.

Perspective into like what I am.

I think men who are in relationships want and they're telling all these things or like or the worst is to me is like, oh I have to hurry up and jerk off because my girls at the store. What like that to me is worse than like you know what I mean in those situations where it's like but you get to like how easily the mind's psyche is.

For a man to like the short intention span mm hm.

I have a really short intention span too, And I think I can do all the fun stuff with someone, but common basic needs as a woman that I need to be in my feminine and play like this good dynamic in rhythm with someone who I date that has to be secure and that person promised over and over like security and these things and every time failed at it.

And they have assistance.

Yeah, they have drivers, they have money, they have the car, they have the look like all the luxury clothes like they have that. Yeah, but when you fall short of falling through on your word.

That's all we have really. All the other stuff is just can be taken away. Yeah.

So if you don't at least follow through on that.

Well, the next person who asked to be their girlfriend in the first immediately the strip club just say no, oh no, I've already done it. Unless it never happen, unless it's not tomorrow, you know that you can consider yes, of course, so do dating apps even, Like can you even really go on there without even like it being there looking you up or any of.

That, Like how do you actually date? I think it's so fun to be on the dating apps.

Honestly, I did a like a twelve step dating course for like twelve weeks. I'm part of this alum group and I just got to chat with the girls like last week, Like it just feeds my spirit up.

Keep dating and keep having fun out there.

But I, like I mentioned, there's like some guys who are like, I'm mad with the teen mom are my interest is teen mom, Like there are just weird things that are like in this sphere on dating apps.

For me, And what's the weirdest date you've ever been on?

I just have totally taken dates of people who are like, like there's this one guy who was I don't know, I was getting like my shoulder worked on from being attacked and he remembered me and then recently reached out this year and was like, you came to see me to get help on your shoulder when you.

First moved to Austin. Let's go on a date. I would love to treat you. And like it was wild.

It was like weird because he rented a Ferrari. It wasn't even his he like rented a house. It was like going beyond.

Did he tell you that these things were rented or you just don't say anything prior to the date.

It was like I had to discover who I was on a date with. And I think like if you work in an office and you've met me and then you want to act like an other taking out on a date, it's just like, don't do that.

Yeah, that's a bit weird.

Yeah, I mean it was bizarre.

It's not very Texas, Like are you finding something you want? Like cowboys?

He just doesn't matter. I'm such like I would prefer like just a CEO a boss.

I kind of think now tech is my thing, Okay, I don't know. There's technology everywhere where I live and men who work in that everywhere where I'm at in Austin, do you love Austin. I think you want to stay there for long term? Man, I can't think of any other place. I mean, my trauma center was there. I just I find nature and peace and good views in Austin, and I just, I don't know.

I like to be there and I like to like fly to New York and work. I think it's like, it's very peaceful. I went to school in San Marcos, so I have a special place for Austin. Austin it's very you know.

It's very It's a lot of fun.

Yeah, they're quite often all right, all right, we're gonna get with truth with Texas, We're gonna we warmed you up In We're going to get a little bit more romantic, kinky.

Naughty, spicy, spicy.

I hope you're Boddy.

We're gonna warm me up a little bit more before I really die. How has your views on sex and intimacy evolved over the years.

Like, I have relationship cards. You can choose green, yellow, red for how close or how distant you want to be. I think like my intimacy is really like I really want to connect with the person and know them.

Okay, I invest in relationship skills. Now, okay, we love that, all right?

Would you consider yourself a romantic?

I am obsessed with romance. I would write like a romance, a comedy romance, like yeah, and cast myself and be like, oh my god, is this is this my life? If I actually got married, like I love romance.

So in that picture perfect world, what would be a perfect date for miss Farah? Or like my perfect husband? I'm sorry, how far can we go? We can hear about me infesting? I love speaking this into existence. So if we want to talk, let's talk about your perfect husband? What does your husband look like?

I've never been married, I've never Yeah, how.

Many times have you been engaged?

I mean my daughter's father in high school? Purpose, but that's like not legitimate. I gave the ring back and then I bought my second engagement ring and then had to call that off, so not really, you know, Okay.

So we're not parents.

She's zero four zero I honestly though, But honestly, I think it's great because I feel like if it would have happened before and those things happen, it would have been horrible.

Because I feel like.

I feel like talking to you now, I feel like you're such a different person than me meeting just meeting you briefly before, and I'm more of an energy person and just be people that way, where it's like you're such in a better place.

Now too, weren't a good relationship and.

Not just a relationship.

Yeah, and I think that that's the important part, where it's like you don't need someone just because you're bored, You have too much going on that, you have a daughter, you have all these things that are really good for you already, where it's like, now we just have to find the missing puzzle piece.

Yeah, so what does that missing puzzle piece.

Look like for you? I think the missing puzzle piece looks like someone who may not need to have a baby and a child with me. It's someone who is is that off the table? Though it's not off the table. I just don't like going on dates and being pressured. Okay, the amazing man would probably be like my biggest teacher in life. He could help enhance what I already know, teaching new things. We can go around the world together, we can have a beautiful home together. Just super supportive

Manifesting, manifesting and speaking it into the world world. I think is like the best part in the first part, and like the more you do it, the more you said you see it, you see different levels of like how what love is and how look that is, and so your person will come Yeah, most from it took place that you've been to.

Ooh, Maldives.

Okay, yeah, hands down, no, right away? How do you cope with heartbreak? I go get ketymine treatment from a doctor?

How long have you been doing Kenemine treatments?

So I finished the first like they say, just do twelve and then you can keep doing maintenance like once a week. So I started in Oh my god, I think it was like December.

Making you do bath.

Sorry, yeah, like you're like, I just like everything's a blur right out, but maybe December of last year and then I've just continued and I think it's been like beautiful. The reason why I knew Kenemino was good for breakup heartbreak whatever. I was actually on a date, a zoom date, not even a real date. I was suspicious about this guy and I was like, are you married? Like what's up? Okay?

Because he said he had kids.

And he goes, I am married.

I am getting a divorce.

But the reason why I am open to dating is because I actually am about to finish ketemine treatment so that I could actually just like kind of like really get past it. And he's like, I am totally seriously good. And I know it's hard to believe because we haven't finalized our divorce. So this guy really and showed me words yeah and yeah. So we weren't gonna work out because I don't believe in dating anyone who's married. But I really appreciate my dating fun.

But I think it's like people come into your life for a reason or a season, right, And I think that like sometimes you need those people to kind of introduce you to those things and also have be living proof of something that you kind of like no or need trust at some point, you know.

What I mean. But people were like doing like I don't know who would like talk about Kenneedy like, oh, I'm doing it, like I don't even know, like not like safe with the doctor. I do everything safe with the doctor. I don't do like weird psychedelic trips or I don't have time for that as a mom, Like I don't know.

What we're doing a scheduled time and we're gonna get it done and we're gonna and this is what's happening, and it really is needed.

I'm sorry, like at the volume that I take it, like I also have to do like you can also get like motion sickness from the Kennydian stuff, and I didn't believe it and I wasn't taking like whatever that tablet is that anyone could take for like motion sea sickness, whatever they do for not moving or something, and maybe it was like something like that. And yeah, without doing that with that, I was getting violently like sick.

So it was like should I continue to do this? And but yeah, no joke, do twelve.

Your whole life will change. I started. I'm like, I'm ready to do comedy like buck it, let me go, let's go all in, strap up. Uh sex on the first date. Hmm, I really am against it. Okay, is it like do you have a number or is it just the first date. I'm really against it, but sometimes

I'll just stand now.

I'd love we should describe. Okay, this last situation, Oh yeah, my little short boyfriend, like my boyfriend in a short time, your weak boyfriend.

Yeah, I was like, did you tell him you loved him? Oh no, Okay, good.

I'm just wondering if you follow, if you're like falling in line with the script, and like, because he's telling you, I'm sure pretty close that he loves you. If he's telling you all this stuff, was promising security and all these things that he's doing really close to being like, I just love you. I've never felt this way about anybody else, and it's just gonna be me and you.

And yeah he was a little wild, but he also like had like you guys, like some men have like a rectile dysfunction, and like is that.

What he had?

Like in the way, Okay, So I always say there's two guys of a rectile dysfunction.

There's the kind where someone willay and like that also is.

Like an insecurity for some men, like they'll just like go quick, go quick, and they like they'll even have to like four or five times a day just to like kind of like last longer, last longer, lasts longer.

And there's like an app for men to fix that as well, with.

That erectile dysfunction. And I've dated a man like, I've dated a man like that. I've actually been at the neurologist with the man like that to fix that and then pay for him to get it fixed. Oh never, okay, like and I think it's like free for men. But anyways, the neurologist who also did his vasectomy for me, because if you got to go that many times, someone could get pregnant.

Do you know what I'm saying, drop it.

I don't do sex with fear, so we're gonna just do it the right way, okay. And it's like you get a ball lipt when you have like a visection.

It's really cool. I've been just so biddy and I have the same doctor and all while your boyfriends get vasecton.

Sure do even the guys who are cheating on their wives. I'm like, you're going to get the visit.

So wild time's and good fun. So the same doctor.

Sees me with all the you know, like the men who need to get asectates.

But then there's the other type.

Of discount card at this point, like men just get it for free. But it's like funny when you dress up. Yeah, when you dress up, was like the naughty nurse. No one forgets you in the office. And I've had also like fans see me and I was taking pictures and having so much fun at the neurologist.

But anyways, love them snipped but equipped.

All right, So that's sur phrase. If you don't have the shirt, I'm sorry you're missing out. Guys.

Hilarious.

The other one it's so boring to talk about, but it happens. It's like we're it's like and then you take like a viagra of whatever kind of short that.

You like, and then it's like a BBC.

You know what I'm saying.

It's like crazy, but you can't go from micro to bby. It's not like one of those fucking things when you're a kid.

It goes into water in a because I've seen a mic. It doesn't matter how much it doesn't go to a baby c. I got a video on my own up about this is a special this is a special man, because I have seen a lot of things in my day and I have, but not that one.

But you can, I, oh, ask all right, literally say it micro scare me like there's very I was like, I don't know if I can actually date this person at all. That's why it lasted a week.

You were experimenting, You're like, well, I was like, I.

Was like, do I still got it? Do I still got it? Do I still got it? And no joke, Nope, it is not even that didn't even have to touch it.

It was.

And I was dangling like like a collar and a chain before dinner and while we were out and just like having fun and like the fantasy is going. He's getting worked up.

On his own like I'm not having to do a damn thing. He just.

He just preak. He made sure, Yeah, made sure. But yeah that was now a BBC after.

Legit, Like so, but do you even get off to that though, like or do you get off to the dobbing part of like your mind sucking him because you said earlier it's like more of a mental thing for him.

Yeah, it was. I was trying to how do you get off?

I don't know. I'm a tricky bitch, but I will say I have more fun with a challenge like a rectile dysfunction.

The negative born way.

He seemed very like stingy with like you'll hold like you'll hold back and saying either you won't say like you'll like hold back.

Oh, I'm a stingy bit. And I think that's also why he was more interested. More interested, I mean, like.

It's a game. Yeah, I guess you know what.

I like to make a game out of anything. I gamify it's a real thing. Like they teach us this in writing for shows. Gamify everything like TikTok, gamify it gains it. And I think I have gamified sex to such a significant degree.

And I gotta say I've ever getten. I shouldn't even say this. I've been getting eight out so damn good. And I'm like, so that's your goats?

Yeah, well for yeah, I'm like, if I see at any pots, I'm like, then just eat it. Yeah, you know what to do. And if that fucking sex.

But I think that that at that point, like they have to be good at that because if you have nothing to bring to the table, like what are we doing, It's just it's just a waste of a man unfortunately.

Yeah, I just feel like what's going on. There's a lot of sadly, a lot of like waste of talent out there, and I'm like.

I could just step up. Guys, have you ever been with the female learn how to use it? No?

Would you?

No? I think I had like some weird thing with my like half sister growing up that I thought was very disgusting and wrong.

And I think so shied you away from all the things. I almost think a disgusted me. Yeah, something was just like really wrong with that.

I know lots of people don't talk about this and they're not authentic, But if I were to just answer this and be like, no, I'm not into girls or anything, like, I just was talking to so many people at this press opening thing, and this couple I was actually open to having another woman involved in their sexual relations and I was actually just like, huh, I don't understand how she's open to this, Like, and a lot of my

Yeah, and when yeah, well in those situations, I feel like, again it's either are you're not You're not, Like you know, it's one of those things where it's like, especially because it's females, like, it's a very intimate situation. So it's again it's you can't fake that. I think that that, to me is more weird than being like just no, yeah, you know, you like what.

You like and that's fine, Okay.

Yeah, so maybe I'm not just never liked it.

I don't know.

But then, okay, toys in the bedroom. You say that you're pretty like dominant with your you know, male partners.

So many times I got so many toys.

Do you have a sex dungeon in your house over there? And I have like a striper pole. The whole things were sady, it's sexy. You gotta have like that, okay, bedroom sexy vibe, and I feel like a lot of people fail to do like the whole like bedroom up right, that's important. Everyone like I actually can't that bedroom's not hot? Like are your sheets cheap?

And all this?

It was so like what kind of county I need? I don't know, like eighteen hundred, we're going on, we're going high.

Do you have a sex bucket list? Is there anything on your bucket list that you neither wanted to try or.

Like something will creep up? Like, ah, man, I I've actually been still like out of my bucket list for a while. We need to work on it, and we need to start making that list again. Yeah, down the road, you're gonna be really lonely.

Maybe I'll have to give you like a toy, had to like give me something to masturbating.

Guys, there's been something really good. I'm totally honest.

I have not even been interested lately. So when's the last time you had sex a long time ago?

Hold on being like, when's the last time that somebody, I mean the same same day.

I don't even know. It's probably like three months, three months, Okay, not the worst.

I will say though. The reason why that this is probably tied to that I was the guy that was your boyfriendri. I slipped and fell and I literally have a kinkle still.

What I'm gonna say in.

Launder and he was actually naked and it was like such a bad situation. Someone really wasn't there for me and I had no idea. I'm still healing. It's been three months. Like it's no joke. I can't even wear stripper heels like in the Stroke Club. It's I know people don't care about that, but we have our cute boots on. I do, I do. I don't even know if I don't even know if this is LV for licens stuff. Yeah, I don't know.

We're like twenty did not plan this.

We're just New Yorkers.

We love it.

Yeah, I'm really grateful to wear boots right now. But I think the pain that shoots up my leg from the sink is still not being healed.

So yeah, I really had a major You're probably watching right now because it's only been three months, and I know you want the switch bag.

So he does, he does. I'm not going back. No, we don't go back, but go forward. When my whole foot turns black from falling and like my whole legs still like kind of screwed up and like my toneel also like got ripped up like.

Y'all, I was bleeding. It was a very bad situation.

I almost thought I maybe shouldn't be doing comedy because I was so screwed up.

So yeah, I think.

I don't know.

I think I like am so just trying to like be comfortable, beautiful.

I will see those boots are fly and you're gonna do an amazing job tomorrow.

I'm gonna be right there watching you, don't you. Yeah you know what I said this today though, So I must be getting like horny or something.

I have no idea because you knew you were going to talk to me.

We're just getting hot, We're getting wild. I love it.

Get me excited.

You've been in Texas for a long time with that, with those words that just get out of your shoot.

I know I was from Iowa and everyone was doing the y'all thing, and now it's like in my throat. Honestly, e, I love you Texans. I was gonna say, it'll come back to me. Oh. I started saying today wow everyone, And I don't know where this came from today, but I just felt like, yeah, one of my last dates with the Acts, which was very firm few he goes what he goes is your go with that you're happy, and it is a rarity there is to get me excited. There's there's a book that I.

Read that it's like that.

That's it's like basically it's like I forget exactly what I have to text you what it is afterwards, but it's basically it's.

It's it do it.

So that is what I'm from.

Food.

So it's like with food, like if you didn't like it, why would like why convince yourself to eat it?

Throw it away?

Like it doesn't make you like good? Like why do we have to make a choice? And like the same way with men? Why do people act like your fake? Oh, tell your partner what you need.

And what you want?

Why can't we communicate?

And you want these people who are fucking you and the most I'm been setting, yes, but you can't tell them harder, faster, pull up or whatever.

And it happens to so many people.

Whatever, But it's which is so crazy.

But it's like communication is key, and that's also why comedy is great because if you laugh about it, you joke about it, and everybody brings more humor to it.

Yeah, I really appreciate that that's real. I will say.

If guys cannot take direction in bed, I'm like, we're gonna really are you very vocal in bed?

I am totally vocal. I like to be vocal. There are ever a time where you're silent.

There are times when I'm silent, But I also feel like what's going on when we're too silent?

But are you like so when you're set and I don't necessarily like no noise and be like weird? But it's like sometimes when people are too talkative, like are you always the alpha?

Are you submissive too? In the bedroom.

I love to feel feminine and submissive, but there are times when you're having sex and you should not be submissive, you know.

I So you do both?

Yeah? And like setting it, I will do, I will, you know, figure it out. I'm super creative. I love having fun again game I find it or just I love fun, exer. I feel like a lot of people have dull, boring sex lives, and I think when you're dating.

Yeah, I think when you're dating and.

You realize people aren't creative or fun or want like a flourishing, abundant, hot, amazing life where you're like, yes, wet pussy energy. They want dried desert not functioning. I give them direction a little bit.

Like that does it sounds horrible? There's no upside to any of that. I feel like it's like, why are we doing that?

Let the let the pussy decide.

That's you know, let the pussy decide.

What's the craziest things that someone could find on your of Well, a micro penis turns into a BBC okay is crazy, It's wild, all right?

Spicy questions, celebrity hall pass. Do you have one anybody in your DM that you know, let's trying to.

Like spark up some interests?

Like I get asked that all the time, and honestly, no one sparks my interests. Verified check marks and sports contracts and things that like nothing really yeah, no, how big is too big? I don't know.

I used to be like, oh my god, there's a size and then are you a size queen? I don't know if I'm a size queen? Is it like eight inches? Is it like nine times?

You know? Some people surprising and I'm like, oh, this is like better. It's like when you have that to nothing, it's a little yeah, like they send you a picture and then you show up and then it's like something else and you're like, what is going on? All right? Last question?

Have you ever to my porn?

No?

I haven't.

Okay, honestly, do you even map too porn? I? Probably? I will say I'm a weirdo. Maybe I have a weirdo. I like my own solo masturbation. Okay, do you watch yourself? I will? Am I a weirdo?

I am so happy making myself happy. I enjoy watching that.

Not everyone's like into watching themselves or yeah, I am super happy naked. I'm super happy pleasing myself. So I will watch my own stuff. I will look back at my old caves with Do you film you and your partners all the time? Yeah?

Okay, And so you just like to watch yourself get fucked? I do? Okay, that's really wrong with Okay, we love it?

Yeah, all right, that's true. With Texas, True Texas. You made it through. You made it through.

I think you did an amazing job. Is there anything that you'd like to ask miss Texas?

Oh my god, Miss Texas. Okay, what is your favorite thing in Austin, Texas? My favorite thing could be food, it could be a place, could be where you walk.

I don't know so food wise, I don't eat red meat or pork anymore.

But I used to love the barbecue. There is like the best barbecue.

Turkey, So I don't like to I do turkey leg type things.

I got two things. I can give you a place to go there.

And then also like as far as like when the summertime, like I liked going to the springs, like the river, Like it's just fun to be outside and like you can jump in like into the waters. Everybody's like everybody's super friendly. Nobody cares what you're doing or who you are, or nobody dresses.

Up, nobody.

It's just very friendly, wholesome fun. Everybody wants everybody have a good time. People look you in the eyes, they shake your hands, they open the.

Doors for you. Like it just feels it's just home. Yeah, I love.

It's a lot of fun.

But yeah, I'll definitely give you some recommendations before I leave.

Yeah, more awesome