33. [Parent Corner] Easy Tips for Building Independence When Transitioning to Kindergarten

Chantal 0:02

Starting this one off with a hard truth for all the toddler and preschool parents out there, you might not like it, but I'm gonna tell you, it's a fact you all need to know. Your child is a completely different person in school than at home. Trust me, they do so many things you probably will never expect them to do in school, then what you get from them at home. Sorry, not sorry. It's the truth. And guess what? It's all good. We are going to use that to our advantage and make it work for us.

Welcome to another episode of our parent corner segment. In these episodes, I share my experiences and expertise as a teacher and parent. To help you navigate this wonderful preschool journey. You're listening to Episode 33 of the preschool Made Easy podcast. I'm your host Chanty Macias, and today we're talking about practical tips for building independence, transitioning into kindergarten, and navigating pushback, and creating a support system that works for you. I've had the honor of helping over 400 families get started with preschool with their ultimate goal in mind to get them ready for kindergarten. They've all used my Kinder readiness checklist, grab the link in the show notes to get your hands on our free, easy to use checklist that tells you everything your littles need to know before starting kindergarten today. All right, let's get started.

Transitioning from preschool to kindergarten is a significant milestone for both children and parents. It's definitely a time filled with excitement, but also a bit of apprehension. Real talk, it can be a bit of a scary time, especially if we don't know what to expect. Or if our kiddos are ready for it. Let's talk about some easy and practical strategies for empowering your preschoolers with the skills they need for kindergarten success, while also navigating the inevitable pushback as they start to assert their independence because you know it's coming.

The first thing we want to do is establish a foundation. Go ahead and start early. It's never early enough. Building independence is a gradual process that begins in their toddler and preschool years. Make sure you show a positive attitude by encouraging a mindset of exploration and problem solving. set realistic expectations. Okay, try to understand that independence looks different for every single child, and that their progress will vary. This includes siblings, I cannot stress this enough. It's one of the main problems I see when I talk to families with multiple children. So often parents will unintentionally compare their children to each other. And we have to understand that as parents. Number one, it's not fair to compare our own children to each other. It's not fair to them. It's not fair to us. And secondly, they are all so different. Even if you think that one is the other twin, and they may physically be twins, but they are still so completely different. And that's a beautiful thing that should be celebrated.

We also want to encourage things like self help skills, okay, this means teaching your preschoolers to dress themselves using the restroom independently because most of the time, a teacher is not going to be there to help them pull up their pants or pull them down or wipe and clean themselves. We have to start teaching them to do this on their own. And that starts at home. Please do not expect the teacher to have to do this as her job because she or he is responsible for so many other things, okay? And we also want to help our children in learning how to tidy up after themselves. Teach them how to open their own things that's using basic fine motor skills like using zippers and closing an opening button, bins and their clothes, using containers for their snacks and their lunch.

And that brings me to my next point, which is getting their own things. Create opportunities for your child, even at home, to practice, help them get their own things independently, like their backpack or their lunchbox. Do a sample routine, like what they would see in school, give them opportunities to practice things like pouring drinks, feeding themselves, and managing just small simple tasks like opening snack containers. Oftentimes, teachers don't eat lunch with their students. Shocking, right? So it would be unwise to expect teachers to do this for them. Okay, obviously, there's always the exception, the container, that's way too hard for them to use on their own. If you really, really must send it with them to school, then at least please teach them how to open and close them properly.

They are also expected to put their own things away. So introduce simple organization systems at home and involve your child in tidying up their own toys and or belongings, you can make this a job for them and reward them for effort. You know, me, I always say to celebrate all the things Okay.

Another thing that we want to try to do is build decision making skills and confidence. This is a great, great emotional support booster. offer choices, right? Provide options within boundaries, to encourage them to make their own decisions. For example, we're going to color now, Honey, do you want the red color or the blue crayon, you're giving them two choices, you're not just giving them a whole pack of 24 Crayons, where they might start to show some signs of anxiety because they don't know what to choose. And that later transfers into some unstable emotions where they don't know how to control it. If a crayon breaks, or if it falls to the floor, or if something that's not planned happens. That's where we lose a little bit of self control. So offer them simple choices. Here are two crayons, which one would you like to start with? Beautiful, I'm going to give you five that you can use in your drawing for today. And that's going to help them feel more calm, more stable, more in control. And then we're going to allow them to select and make their own choices, right. This can also work for picking out their clothes, their snacks or the activities that they want to do. This helps them gain a sense of autonomy and responsibility. So it's a win win.

And as always, please please celebrate small victories. Acknowledge and praise your child's efforts as they demonstrate this newfound independence because it is so cool. When they do things on their own. And you can tell them, You did awesome. I'm so proud of you.

Embrace the mistakes. parents encourage their resilience by viewing setbacks as learning opportunities rather than failure. Okay, model this by thinking out loud. This is one of the most important points in this entire episode. You definitely want to model this, okay? For instance, let's say you spill your coffee, and you're about to lose it because Good Lord, we all know we need our coffee, okay, or your morning tea. We spill it, it's a mistake is slipped out of our hands. We can model this by thinking out loud and saying in front of them. Oh my goodness, I cannot believe I just dropped that. It slipped out of my hand. It was a mistake. It's okay. I'm going to take a deep breath now. And I'm going to just go ahead and clean up after myself. Because I'm independent, and I'm strong and I know what I'm doing. And I feel good. We're gonna make this a better day by pouring ourselves another cup and everything will be fine. We're going to have a great day today. It sounds like a long script. But really, it's just you thinking out loud the entire process of what you would say if something like that happened. Okay, here's a quick tip. We never want to say what we're actually thinking. Okay, there are children present.

All right, let's move on to the next point. Promote problem solving. Okay, encourage critical thinking and problem solving skills by asking them lots of open ended questions, and then give them different scenarios to think of support them in finding solutions to everyday challenges. This helps them build their creativity and resilience. And my last point with this one is cultivate social skills, offer them opportunities to interact with their classmates and other adults on their own, like in a one on one setting or even on a small group so they don't get overwhelmed, encourage them to share and take turns and resolve conflicts and peaceful ways. It helps them build those super important positive social relationships with others.

Now we're going to talk about transition strategies for preschool to kindergarten and navigating pushback. Okay? So I want you to just think for a minute, just think out loud with me, because after all, we are modeling, right? What makes transitioning to kinder, so hard. Sometimes it's the reality that hits us in the face that our babies are growing up. Sometimes it's that we still want them to be little. But do we really want to hinder them from growing? Aren't we raising them to be amazing grown adults one day who can live on their own and raise a family or live their dream job? Or just simply be happy in the world? What makes it hard for our kiddos? Is it that they feel scared to start something new, or that they're entering unfamiliar territory? Are they worried about meeting new people, talking to our kids about all of these things, can really make the transition a kinder, so much more of a positive experience, go and visit their new classroom, meet the teacher, explore the school environment, to relieve some of their anxiety and build that confidence that they've got this. You can also reinforce routines and expectations at home by gradually introducing elements of their upcoming kindergarten schedule, to make sure that they are as ready as they will ever be.

When it comes to navigating push back. We have to remember, they are three, four and five years old. Okay? Do you remember what it's like to have to start all over again, somewhere new, with new expectations, new people, new rules and routines. It's hard. We should definitely try to understand resistance and recognize that resistance is a perfectly natural part of development. Let's validate their emotions, all of them and listen to their concerns and frustrations with empathy. Then, let's follow up with guidance by offering gentle reassurances. And showing them that we respect their boundaries. We care about how they feel. And we want them to know that it's okay to feel the way that you do. It's okay to say that you're upset. It's okay to voice your concern and that we as adults, will help you grow and learn from this to become the best version of yourself. You can be. That's empowerment right there baby.

The partnership between parents, educators and support systems in schools is one of the most critical things to consider when getting your child ready for kindergarten. Communicate with the preschool teachers and kindergarten staff to ensure a smooth transition and address any concerns or specific needs right away. seek guidance by attending workshops or getting parenting resources, and finding community programs that offer support in building independence and kindergarten readiness, like this podcast in hint, make sure that your support system models independence, so that they can lead by example, by showing your child what self help skills and problem solving strategies look, sound and feel like help them cultivate a growth mindset. Encourage perseverance and a willingness to just try new things. Repeat this to them. effort over perfection.

All right, let's recap. In today's episode, we talked about some practical tips for building independence. We also talked a little bit about transitioning to kindergarten and how you can navigate some of that pushback you might get. And we also went over how to create a support system. As parents, it's our job to empower our children with independence. So they've got the best and strongest foundation possible. We're on a mission to get them ready for kindergarten and beyond. So let's nurture their confidence, independence and problem solving skills so that they can thrive in every way possible. And hey, if you've got other parent friends that could use our help, share this podcast with them and help us grow our community. After all, we love our listeners, and it really does take a village so let's do this.