Mastering Delayed Gratification: Enjoy Your Journey to Becoming a Physician Part 1

And so when we talk about delayed gratification , it's kind of similar to what's happening right now when people talk about savings , where people are like fire , fire , fire . I'm going to eat saltines and retire early , and it's like I don't know if that's really the mission .

It's the same way with our academics , where we talk about this delayed gratification , delayed gratification For most of you guys , as students , for most students , the issue is not that we're too into delayed gratification , it's that we fail to recognize the significance and the importance of delayed gratification . We're all about that instant right .

What feels good now ? Oh , that feels good now . So we procrastinate , put off the work that we should do today that will serve us tomorrow in lieu of fun today . That's going to make us pained tomorrow . We got to flip that right . But then there are students .

Many of you guys are maybe there , maybe you , if you've been on my channel , if you've been on my channel , if you've been on my website , right , if you've been listening to me , you understand the power and the potency of delayed gratification and how , without understanding that we must .

We must act and work and think with tomorrow in mind , with our dream first and foremost in our mind . If we understand that , then our focus is delayed gratification .

But it can be easy sometimes to take it too far , to where you think that if you're having fun , that if you have joy in your life , that if you're happy right now , you're doing the wrong thing .

And I see it all the time as I go out to these talks and I just look in students' eyes and you guys , some of you guys , look dead in your hearts and your souls . Everything about you has been worn down and tattered and it's because you're like no , no , gratification . Today it's all work , no play , all work , all work . We can't do that .

We have to understand that we are human beings and the human beings we live in a cyclical life cycle . We have ups , we have downs , we have highs , we have lows , we have rests , we have work .

You must ride the waves of the up and down and if you don't , then your life quickly , right , if you don't have that balance of work and play , your life quickly gets out of balance , out of whack . We feel it and what happens , y'all ? What happens All that ? Oh , I'm just dry , I'm grinding , I'm grinding , I'm grinding , I'm grinding . What happens ?

How do we feel ? What happens to us ? Right , and Isaiah just put in the box right now , he said one doc told me this balance stuff doesn't exist .

You just do whatever you got to whenever you got to do it , and that's a bad way to think about it , that's a survivor's mentality , and what today's about is getting to a thriver's mentality , not surviving the day , thriving today , thriving right now and in terms of your physician life .

Guys , I did a video last month , right A couple weeks back , talking about work-life balance as a physician in your career . Today we're talking about as a student specifically . And so here , right , when we delay all the gratification , I love it . Thank you guys for commenting in the box there , right .

Eventual burnout , right , julian says I'm right on time with this message . Thank you for letting me know . If this is right on time for you guys , take a second , like this video right now . Let me know that I'm right on time with your message . Right now , feeling crispy right that burnout right . Feeling like you want to give up , like why am I doing this ?

Feeling depressed . Thank you for sharing guys . These are the feelings that we have because it's all work , it's all grind and the problem with saying , oh , you know what , I'm going to enjoy myself , right . This is what happens when we talk about all blade gratification .

The very first thing that happens is right , and we must recognize listen to me , guys , this is so crucial is that we tell ourselves , oh , you know what I'll enjoy myself when I get here , I'll be happy when I get here , I'll do this , win this . My life is meant to be lived at this point .

I'm not going to live and have my head down under a rock until I get to this point .

And the problem is is that we fail to recognize and I hope you guys get this message today you will never be freer than you are right here , right now , today , listening to this video , anyone listening to this video , even if you're a doctor , right now , you will never be freer than you are in this exact moment and we have to recognize that .

As young students , I know you feel like , oh gosh , I got all this on me , I got this on me , I got this on me .

But you have to recognize , as you advance through your career , all that happens is you have more professional responsibilities , you have more personal responsibilities , you have more life , happenstance , occurrence , people depending on you and so forth , and so you will never be as free as you are today .

Right In college I can remember this right you got small bills . You're like , oh , I don't pay for these books , books , I wish I only had to pay for books . Right , you have loose relationships , like , oh , I'm kind of seeing someone and they like to hang out on Fridays . Loose affiliations , I'm married , y'all . I got real stuff going . I got kids .

Right Back then in college . Nobody depends on your money . If anybody goes hungry , it's just you . Right , if I don't do my job , my kids go hungry . And I want you guys to learn I'm an old gray beer having cat . I'm an old anesthesiologist . Take it from me . I know right now you seem tied up , but you're free .

I look at my pre-kids , pre-marriage self and I look at myself like , man , you was a slacker . Yes , you worked . Yes , you worked . You got in a Stanford Medical School . But man , that was a slacker who was going to college . What did you do with all that free time ? You could have been doing even more crazy stuff .

So recognize that you got to enjoy your journey right now . Take the time right now . And the other part about this is it's not just the fact of being free now , it's the mentality of it .

If you fail to recognize , take advantage of the free time you could have right now , as you get busier , you'll only feel busier and busier and busier , and so you will never see yourself being free . It's a mind shift . It's a perspective of freedom and flexibility . To create joy in your life , you must craft that joy . So that's the first thing .

The second part of this is that we have to recognize that if we aren't having fun in our lives , people see oh , you know what , if I take a day off and I do something for me , I'm falling behind . No , no , guys .

If you take a day for you , if you take some time to have fun , you are moving yourself forward , because the balance is not a luxury , it's not just something like , oh , you should have , it's something you must have , because that's how you avoid the burnout , and even before the burnout , here's how it goes .

If we're trying to be successful , trying to be high level , high performance students in the classroom , how can we be successful ? How can we find motivation ? How many of you guys struggle with motivation ? We can't be motivated to do the hard work if we don't reward ourselves with . The only reason we work hard is to have joy after the fact .

I don't go to work if there's not a check at the end of the day . I don't go to work if there's not a smiling patient to make me feel good . I ain't going to work . I need a reward and for many of you guys as students , if you're lacking motivation , maybe it's because you haven't done anything to incentivize yourself .

Oh , I'm just going to slave away today and do these classes and then later on I'm just going to be all nervous and upset and anxious and then I'm just going to keep working until I die . Where's the incentive ? Where's the motivation ?

We have to tie the hard work with the rejuvenation , with the things that jumpstart us and get our batteries back going and make us feel like working . Plus . Then , after we do the work and we feel worn down , we use the joy , we use the fun to recharge us and actually get us back to full strength . Does that make sense , y'all ?

So we lose on all sides if we don't build in this fun . We have to enjoy the life right now , and when you guys go to enjoy your life , this is such something that I think a lot of people don't touch on . My life is amazing . It has been amazing Even since college . It's been an amazing life .

It started off really sucky , but it got really great , and one of the reasons it got great was because I made sure that not only did I do the smartest work possible , that I not have the best study strategies , that I not focus on the best resources , that I not do all my pre-med extracurriculars the way I wanted to do them , but I also made sure that

everything that wasn't professional all my personal life was also optimized . When I'm talking about fun , you got to pick something that is the most fun for you . You have to pick activities that don't tear you down but instead build you up , and I see this constantly where students go . Oh yeah , I did take time off from studying .

Well , what did you do over that time ? Oh well , I talked to my mom , who was always on my case about not having taken the MCAT yet . Oh well , I went to my other job . There's a break from studying what ? How was that reward ? Oh , you know what I went to ?

We have to pick things in our free time that actually are going to restore us , rejuvenate us and build us up and not tear us down . And the biggest one and we're seeing kind of a societal change in this , but the biggest one that I see students fall into the trap of is partying incorrectly .

And when I say partying incorrectly , I mean mean depending on booze and alcohol and recreational medications prescription medications to have fun . How many of you guys I want to ask you to call it yourself how many of you guys have a friend who is zero fun until they've had their third drink ? They're zero fun until they've had their recreational drug of choice .

How many guys know that person ? They can't relax , they can't have fun unless they are sloppily drunk . How many of you guys know people like this ? Don't let that be . You guys . You shouldn't need alcohol to enjoy your social events and social activities . If you do , it means you are picking the wrong activities .

You should be able to enjoy your activities sober . Does everybody understand what I'm saying right now ? If you need alcohol or drugs to enjoy your recreational fun time , you are not doing the right activities . You shouldn't need the alcohol . And I say this to you .

Yes , I'm old , I get it , but even when I was young guys , if you're blacking out constantly , you're not even remembering . You can't even remember the fun when you're studying . You can't even remember the next day . Plus , if you're hungover or you're slowed down , whatever , you're obtuse because of what you did . It's no good academically , but worse , it's like .

It's not what it is . And I'm someone . For me , I made sure that I had lots of fun in college . I worked hard Monday through Thursday , sunday night , monday , tuesday , wednesday , Thursday . Then when Friday hit , friday afternoon , it was party time 48 straight hours Friday afternoon till Sunday . I am partying my gosh darn face off . I'm everywhere right .

I went to college at UC Irvine , home of the ferocious Andrews zot , zot , zot . We would drive up to USC hit parties at USC . Go to UCLA hit parties . Drive all the way up to Santa Barbara party our faces off all gosh darn weekend . And I did all of it sober . Yes , there were plenty of sloppy people around me , but I was sober guys .

I didn't have my first alcoholic drink until I was 22 years old . I went to all the parties . I saw all the kegs , but I was there sober and it was so awesome to be able to .

I can still remember all the good times and the memories and everything and it served me so well because I could go party my face off and come back the next day and still be sharp and still be sharp . I literally can remember . I remember one year Halloween fell on a Wednesday .

Me and a couple of my buddies drove up to Santa Barbara and , if you guys don't know , uc Santa Barbara is an amazing party school but in particular , halloween Santa Barbara is hot fire . Okay , it's incredible . You guys , everyone , have a great time . You're young people . I'm too old now . Well , young people , santa Barbara Halloween , it's legendary .

We drove up there Wednesday , partied our butts off . On Wednesday . I had a biochemistry test . Thursday morning we drove back from Santa Barbara . It's not a close drive , it's like four hours-ish , three and a half hours . We drove back in the middle of night , it's like three in the morning . We drove back .

My buddies literally dropped me off , dropped me off in front of the lecture hall . I had a pen and I went and I didn't have it and at that time I didn't have a pencil I had to go in and ask for a pencil to take my advanced biochemistry exam the day after Halloween .

And what's important about this and this is the next point I want to get to about this is A you can do those activities , you can have fun , you can do these things . You can do it sober because you can function the next day . Have fun , you can do these things , you can do it sober because you can function the next day .

But , more importantly , guys , what would allow me to go and party my face off all night and then come back and do my biochemistry exam ? It was me thinking ahead . And so what I want for you guys is you to think about it that way and to have scheduled right , optimized fun time .

So if you want to enjoy say some of you guys have an exam on a Monday you're like , oh , it's going to mess up my whole weekend . No , it doesn't mess up your whole weekend . Think ahead and say listen , I want that weekend for me , so I'm going to get ahead . Right ?

Julian said front-loading , I'm going to front-load , I'm going to be two , three days a week ahead of my class . That way I'm going to treat myself not like the exams on Monday , like the exams on Friday . That way , saturday and Sunday I can party my face off and go to my test conference on Monday .

So when I knew Halloween was on a Wednesday and it says on Thursday , I worked before that . I'm working hard so that way I can break out of there Wednesday , go party , come back on Thursday . I'm prepared and I get the A in the class .

So I want you guys to plan your fun , not only the activities you do , but I want you to plan ahead so that way you can enjoy those activities . Stop doing that . I see this . I took my computer to the party . I took my flashcards to the party . Oh , I was going to study after the party . You're not doing that stuff y'all .

So set yourself up to maximize that enjoyment and maximize your social activities to make them as fun as humanly possible . Does everybody see what I'm saying ? Maybe you don't party . What are some other activities that you guys enjoy doing ? Right , how else can you build yourself up in your social life ? What other things rejuvenate you guys ?

How do you guys take the edge off ? How do you guys get the battery back going sharp so you can come back in and study hard . I already mentioned partying . That was my number one . Some other things that I really enjoyed are sports . I always loved sports . In college I would actually go to the batting cages .

If you guys have ever been to the batting cages or played baseball , you know there's nothing better than man just getting a good . You just swing in and just like a good stroke on a ball , you just light it up .

But it was so awesome to go to the batting cages because you can just swing and all that tension , all that aggression you had , you just take it out on the ball . Take it out on the ball , you leave those cages .

Man , my shoulders are relaxed Because I've done that physical thing to get all that aggression , get all that pent-up rage out of me so I can go back and calm and sit and do my stuff right . Nico says skateboarding , lifting weights , right , being physical like I was just talking about , right .

The other physicality I loved was basketball right , when I was like man , I need to blow off some steam . I go play some pickup basketball . Hey , who's running , let me get on the team . And I'm taking all my frustration , all my woes , all my anger . I'm taking it out on the court . I'm trying to dunk on people . You know I can't even dunk .

I'm going to dunk on it , I don't even care , I'm throwing it at the rim , whatever's happening , because it's getting that energy out right , that competitive fire . It's lighting me up . And it was also cool . Just kind of get around some people and see some people who didn't have all the stress that I felt like I had in my life . I can see a lot of .

The other thing I like doing that was relaxing . I like going to the beach and walking the beach y'all . If you guys don't live on a coast , get to a coast right . Dijon's in Miami , dijon , I saw your email today . I'm sorry , man , I missed . I just saw your email . I would have . I wouldn't know , next time I'm in Miami we're gonna eat together .

But if you live , the wet sand in the waves , oh my gosh , the sound of the ocean , right , just the vibe , right , chill vibes , right . I love the beach .

And so going to the beach , walking around , sitting down , listening to the waves , watching the sunset , it's wonderfully relaxing when you are really , really stressed out and feeling like , oh , I can't go on from this day , just reset everything , get it all right for yourself . Okay , yeah , julian backed me up to go hoop it right .

Oh , and Dejan said bike ride to the beach , watch the sunrise . Yep , there it is . There , it is All right . So does everybody get that ? We're trying to enjoy the journey and I just want to put an exclamation mark on this , to kind of point this out . I just mentioned this guy just popped to me asjohn talked about this .

Being in Miami , I just got off vacation with my family and Shannon is going to crack up because she's on here .

But if you focus on building fun into each and every day , building joy and excitement in each and every day , then every day it breaks up the monotony and it makes every day a fun day , a special day , and then other things will fade away and just every day is awesome .

And for me , this has been a staple of my life and continue to be a staple of my life , and it was evidenced actually today when my wife texted me a photo album , because you know how your iPhone puts together photos of , on this day , whatever .

Blah , blah , blah and the iPhone put together a little sample to let us know hey , listen , this is a big day and it was anniversary photos .

And so my wife and I allegedly we just had our 12th wedding anniversary yesterday and it's hilarious because neither one of us knew that yesterday was our anniversary and we laughed and we texted and we're doing double jinx back and forth because we were texting and I was like dang , I'm like must mean that every day is a celebration .

It must mean that we love each other every single day , and that's what it is . Is we take time out . Like I said , we're spontaneously in Miami just for fun . Like , hey , like last week , I got an extra day off on Friday I'm going to be out of a clinic early . You want to go do something ? Let's do something .

Oh , kids want to go to Miami , let's go to Miami . Boom , and we just flew to Miami spontaneously . And so when you build fun in , when you build celebration in , when you build those social balance in , it's amazing because the grind doesn't seem like a grind . You don't need to look ahead to a vacation , you don't need to look ahead to a holiday . Why ?

Because every day is a gosh darn holiday . Every day is made special by the way you treat it , by how you look to suck all the joy and all the juice and all the love and all the amazingness , all the laughter out of every single day . That way you're too busy celebrating every day to care about one day and it just all goes together .

So , happy anniversary to my wife . I remember it , of course , obviously , but get to the point where you're having so much fun in your day you don't know , you don't . You're like , oh , holiday break , I don't care , I'm like every day is a break for me , I'm loving it , I'm living it All right . So that's point one . Are we all good ?

Point one is that we have to find that balance and we have to take things and find things that are restorative to us and make us feel good in our journey . Okay , luna , okay , point number two . So if you're liking this video right now , you guys , let's reset this . I'm Dr Andrew Pineset .

This is balancing social life in classes in college and finding your perfect balance , right .