In this fitting and perfect send-off and season finale, I'm joined by two very awesome fellow podcasters and entrepreneurs who also happen to be platonic life partners. Foxxy Devine aka Seth Hill and Luna Hawks aka Jozette Gordon are fire dancers, apothecary owners, fashion designers, illusionists...the list goes on! They're also super witchy and fun, and this was a great episode where we got to learn all about who they are and what they do. Of course get to hear their story of becoming platonic...
Nov 03, 2021•41 min
Maria has been openly polyamorous for the past 10 years and has shared her experiences through multiple media sources over that time. Having heard of polyamory at an earlier time in her life, her own realization that she was polyamorous was like the turn of a light bulb. Maria woke up one day and it hit her right there, "I'm polyamorous!" It still took another 2 years for Maria to begin her first polyamorous relationship, and she recommends others to take some time to learn about polyamory befor...
Nov 02, 2021•34 min
Angelica is a passionate writer who's been writing creatively as long as she's known how. She's in the process of writing an epic, queer, and witchy tale spanning a total of 12 books, and folx...she's already written 4 of those books!! Angelica tells us a bit about her books and her characters, and how her life influenced her story. Being raised Roman Catholic had an effect on Angelica's view of herself. As she deconstructed her religious guilt, she had to unlearn the idea that, as a woman she w...
Nov 01, 2021•36 min
We are lucky enough to be joined in this episode by listener Stephanie Symonds-Smith on her BIRTHDAY, and her bubbly personality shines through as we laugh our way through a fantastic conversation. Stephanie shares her story and background, including her ambition to become a sex coach and some history on her polycule. She introduces us to her constellation, including her husband, their partner, and a couple that she dates! Recently Stephanie's husband and their partner have become closer, and St...
Oct 27, 2021•36 min
Albert has been creating awesome content on Instagram @polymananswers, and you should definitely go check him out! In this episode, he talks about how he grew up in a polygenist household, so non-monogamy was always part of his history. Patriarchal culture being what it is, however, it came as a shock to even his non-monogamous family when Alberts femme partners were given the same freedom to have other partners as he did. The blowback Albert experienced was enough for him to learn quickly to ha...
Oct 26, 2021•33 min
Justine joins me on this episode to talk about the intersection of polyamory and sex work. As a sugar baby herself, Justine talks about the work, effort, time, and energy it takes to be successful as an online sex worker. Having and maintaining multiple online relationships is a full-time job, and Justine talks about how these relationships often become real relationships, even if they start as transactional. One thing that came up during our conversation was how Justine protects herself in her ...
Oct 25, 2021•31 min
Sarah was one of those friends who was always the listening ear, until finally someone mentioned that she should actually get paid for helping people the way she did! Inspired to social work and helping others, Sarah found that shame came up over and over again in her practice with regard to identity, gender, sex, sexuality, and trauma. Sarah explains where shame tends to come from (often societally influenced), and things get really deep when she starts talking about the differences between gui...
Oct 20, 2021•33 min
I almost feel like I need to put a trigger warning on this conversation with my brother, but I was teased enough about the disclaimers I made during the show that hopefully will be enough! My brother, Hernan, and I are two very different people, and in this episode he shares some of the things he's learned over the past 9 months and 113 episodes of this show. I told my bro about being polyamorous a few years ago, but even though we spent a lot of time doing business together, we never really tal...
Oct 19, 2021•33 min
Beth never felt quite at home in monogamous relationships and had heard of poly once upon a time, but after her second marriage didn't work out Beth decided to be intentionally single for a while and during that time she dove into polyam research and discovered Solo-Polyamory. I ask Beth about the things that she had to accept about herself and accept herself as a polyamorous woman, and she explains how she had to unlearn monogamy before she could even begin that process. As it turns out, this i...
Oct 19, 2021•34 min
Roy Graff has been on the show once before, but in the months that followed he has teamed up with several other creators for events and he's now moderating the men's Discord channel for Remodeled Love. After sharing a few details of his collaborations, we jump right into talking about the differences in solo-poly, non-hierarchical, and just dating around. Roy talks about some common misconceptions around solo-poly, including the perceived lack of commitment that people incorrectly believe SoPo f...
Oct 13, 2021•33 min
Alonna Donovan Makinson was inspired to serve the polyam community when, as a practicing therapist, she discovered an abundance of polyam clients and a nearly complete lack of polyam affirming therapists in her area. We dive right into the constant bombardment of messaging from all sorts of media sources, and how the "one man, one woman" messaging and lack of representation in the media for the majority of our history impacts all of us as a society at large. Isolation and lack of social support ...
Oct 11, 2021•32 min
Miss Nookie is a kinky educator and runs datingkinky.com, a FREE service to help kinky folx find more than just one another; she facilitates kinky folx finding the resources and tools they need for successful kinky relationships! In this fun-filled episode, Miss Nookie and I talk about her newest book, The Big Book of Ass, and despite a minor giggle fit here and there, we get to some really great conversation around all things anal. Miss Nookie talks about getting comfortable with butt play, enc...
Oct 06, 2021•34 min
In this fun episode, my metamour Jason Daubert hops on to chat with me and see what polyam topics we might cover. We start by taking a page out of the Daylover's book (@RemodeledLove on IG) and start with Jason's privileges, which leads into some great conversation about the terminology that we use in our polyam communities. I use "partner in common" instead of "shared partner" to describe the partner that connects us, and we talk about the connotation of possessiveness that we're addressing by ...
Oct 05, 2021•36 min
Annie Boheler is a Somatics Certified therapist and we kick off this conversation by talking about the importance of having connection to and balance in our bodies, and how somatics training and therapy can help us find that connection. On the subject of balance, we jump right into talking about what should or shouldn't be shared between multiple partners. Annie encourages us to question our reasons for sharing or asking for information, and recognizing where those questions are coming from--inv...
Oct 04, 2021•31 min
Greg and Leanne Million have been together more than five year (married for one) after meeting on OK Cupid, and during their relationship they have gone through phases of opening and closing their relationship. Both have had non-monogamous relationships in the past, but they are still imperfect humans with emotions that need to be examined and harnessed. As Greg notes, the one thing that connects us all is our emotions! Leanne shares what emotions she was feeling when their relationship began as...
Sep 29, 2021•47 min
Kieran Grosman is a transman, kinky, polyam therapist out of ++++ who never had a successful fight with a partner. Every time the first fight happened, it spelled the end of the relationship! Kieran knew there had to be a better way, and therapy helped him learn and implement strategies to improve his relationships. Kieran shares his experience with dysthymic disorder, what he describes as a continuous low-grade depression stemming from his closeted queer- and transness. Therapy saved his life b...
Sep 28, 2021•30 min
Before anything else, I wanted to make sure that when approaching this topic of "is polyamory right for me" that I was speaking with someone who was accepting and affirming of polyam. Our guest Maya Lane has her own history with the poly life, and she explains all of the things that it has done for her life and why she is completely supportive of those who practice it. Maya shares the story of her now twenty-year marriage, a relationship which started out non-monogamous and stayed that way for o...
Sep 27, 2021•31 min
Brittany Bannerman is one of those people that always had friends coming to her, telling her their deepest darkest, and she found herself wanting to help people navigate their mental health full-time. She's proud to be able to be part of people's healing journeys, and when polyamory was presented to her in some of the communities she was a part of, she discovered that it made a lot of sense to her and she wanted to support people shed monogamy and embrace their authentic selves. One principle Br...
Sep 22, 2021•33 min
I've never considered myself much of an artist, but Tara Graviss has heard that from her clients before and it never stopped her from helping them! As it turns out, art is more than drawing and painting, and Tara's expertise is in finding which artistic expression works best for her clients and to use it as a tool to talk about their feelings. During our chat, Tara explains the difference between art therapy and expressive art therapy, that being who decides the meaning of the art that's being c...
Sep 21, 2021•31 min
How many of us have even considered what Self-Consent means? In this episode, educator and therapist Sophia Graham walks us through her journey to discovering how important self-consent became to her, and how it can help each and every one of us! Sophia challenges us to ask, "Who am I?" and refuse to leave that question answered only at the surface. She encourages us to explore ourselves more deeply than ever, bringing all of our various identities to light and finding out whether our identities...
Sep 20, 2021•37 min
Tavo Alcoser is the lead vocalist of the touring band Jarabe Mexicano, whose mission includes outreach to underserved communities promoting diversity and inclusivity. Tavo is also a Latin American Studies major, and with his help I've been able to dig deeper into my roots and heritage. In this episode, Tavo shares his experiences growing up as a transborder resident--living in Tijuana, Mexico, and going to school in San Diego. He talks about why, despite living south of the border, he didn't lea...
Sep 16, 2021•33 min
Today's guest Carrie Sacket practices social therapeutics in the great state of New York and in this episode she explains exactly why social therapeutics uses a group-centered approach to therapy. Carrie explains how, as social creatures, we human beings can find the both the cause and the cure to our emotional turmoil through social interaction. Within the context of polyamory, the group relationship is of even more importance. Carrie talks about how polyamory is full of people who write their ...
Sep 15, 2021•35 min
I was married and lived with my wife for 6 years until late March 2021. This episode is some of my personal story, where I'm currently at in my own polyamory journey, and my coming to terms with solopolyamory. I talk about the process of decoupling or detangling for new couples, my understanding of what Solopoly usually means, and whether or not I actually identify as SoPo. Much of my life was spent in fear of being alone, but I've learned to become more comfortable on my own and I talk about ho...
Sep 14, 2021•37 min
Justine Guzman is a therapist out of the Dallas-Fort Worth area who shares her story of discovering non-monogamy and how it has affected her various relationships. We talk about her progress in being publicly open about her polyamory, even loud about it sometimes, and why living openly authentic is important to her. Justine shares the many roles that her intersecting identities play in her personal growth, and we commiserate on how our friends, family, and parents have reacted to our polyamorous...
Sep 13, 2021•38 min
In this episode I have a chance to chat with Kevin A. Patterson, author of Love's Not Colorblind, the foremost book on race and polyamory. Having been tagged in my interviews with Olivia, Kevin felt called to address my comment regarding my mindset of victims and victors. I have a chance to explain my comment further, and Kevin helps me understand how viewing people by this binary idea is a value judgment based on how much we can endure, even though the problem isn't our strength--it's the socia...
Sep 09, 2021•39 min
In this continuing conversation around creating inclusive communities, I share my experiences of assimilation and rejection of my Mexican culture growing up. I tell the story of visiting Mexico as a kid, and my difficulty in taking pride in my Mexican heritage based on my perception of the country, specifically what I saw in the "dirty" border town of Tijuana. I talk about learning Spanish before English, and being placed in the ESL class in early childhood, despite rejecting the language at hom...
Sep 08, 2021•32 min
This was such a great conversation with relationship therapist Paige Bond, who breaks down the worst of the worst, most problematic behaviors in relationships often referred to as the four horsemen. We dive deep into each of these: criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling, and the antidotes (or countermeasures) for each one. Paige gives so many great examples of each, and helps us create better "I-Statements" to make sure that we are taking responsibility for our own actions. We also...
Sep 07, 2021•35 min
What happens when we open our relationships and our partners begin to love someone else? If we are stuck in a scarcity mindset, we may believe that love in finite and become fearful. Petra Stone helps us understand where the scarcity mindset may come from, and invites us to explore strategies to overcome that mindset and welcome a belief of abundance. We talk about the misplaced belief that attention is equated with love, and how that belief is rooted in fear. When it comes to our partners' atte...
Sep 06, 2021•40 min
Dr. Dana McNeil is a fellow San Diegan whose journey into therapy was inspired twofold. First, by her experiences as an insurance claims adjuster, where she would play the role of a witness to people going through pain and trauma; and secondly by going through couples' counseling using the Gottman method with her husband. She tells her story of realizing that being a therapist was her calling, and how she's used her practice to create safe spaces for folx of all walks of life who want to improve...
Sep 01, 2021•34 min
Krista is the co-founder of @PolyInPlace and she has teamed up with previous guest and friend of the podcast, Claire Travers @PolyPages to launch a book club for the polyamorous community, starting in October 2021. If you are looking for support and to engage with the community, be sure to go to www.polypages.org/bookclub to join! As a natural storyteller, Krista was inspired to create a community and platform for others to share their journeys into polyamory when she and her polycule hunkered d...
Aug 31, 2021•33 min
