In this episode you'll explore what moms should and should not tolerate. An important question to ask yourself at the start of a new year is, "What am I tolerating in my life?" Clue, if you are not enjoying your life and you feel drained and you cant remember the last time you had a really good day, there is a strong chance you are tolerating something you should not be tolerating. What do I mean when I say tolerating? You are putting up with things in your life that you do not want. These thing...
Jan 27, 2020•28 min•Ep. 57
I have spent a lot of time listening to what frustrates moms. At the top of the list is not being able to communicate to their teens. When I dig down and ask the moms what they mean by this, they say they want an open, authentic, and positive response from their teen. Because if you don’t get a positive response you are not going to have the conversation or the behaviors/results you want. The million-dollar question is, “How do you get a positive response from your teen?” There are many aspects ...
Jan 20, 2020•26 min•Ep. 56
Moms have no problem being hard on themselves, but often have a hard time being kind to themselves. Moms don’t do this intentionally. It happens by default, because we are taking care of everyone else's needs we forget and don't take the time to care for our own needs. This is not very kind. My last episode was on expectations. Because we live in a culture of perfectionism we are often striving after unrealistic expectations we put on ourselves. We end up feeling defeated and that’s not very kin...
Jan 13, 2020•22 min•Ep. 55
This episode focuses on expectations and parenting. To be human is to have expectations. Our expectations can help us feel hopeful. They can help us get through hard times and transitions. But they can also cause parents a lot of pain and be the impetus for drama. Recently, one mom told me, "I have been so much happier lately. Since I have adjusted my expectations, things have been so much better between me and my teenage daughter. This got me thinking about how big a role expectations play in p...
Dec 16, 2019•33 min•Ep. 54
This episode is about, Gratitude: Are You Feeling It? Even though Thanksgiving is just a few days away, this podcast is about (way) more than just Thanksgiving, this info is relevant 365 days a year. In this episode we will talk about why gratitude is good for us. It’s the gateway to true joy and even miracles. We’ll explore why being grateful is challenging at times and definitely not our natural state in this culture. Also, we’ll look at practical steps to put some genuine gratitude back into ...
Nov 25, 2019•22 min•Ep. 53
In this episode I discuss How to Keep Your Teens Safe Online. with Diana Graber. Snapchat, Instagram, Fortnite, cyberbullying, sexting, and technology addiction are some of the digital concerns that keep today’s parents up at night. Moms toss and turn, worry, second guess themselves about their rules and boundaries about all things digital. This is why I brought in an expert in the field to address your questions. Diana is the author of “Raising Humans in a Digital World: Helping Kids Build a He...
Nov 11, 2019•31 min•Ep. 52
Today we are going to look at parenting, through the lens of experience. There are many lenses in which we can examine parenting, like mindset. Today we will focus on the lens of experience. The goal of this podcast is to dial up thriving positive experiences with your family and dial down the negative ones by becoming aware of several X-factors that rob you of enjoying the teenage years. This is especially applicable as we approach the holiday season. Often there are parts of the parenting expe...
Nov 04, 2019•27 min•Ep. 51
In my work I talk a lot about how to prevent and dial down the drama. A crucial part of this is how to repair the relationship after the conflict or the big blow up. And the good news is that you can repair the relationship. The first step is to give a sincere apology. And this can be challenging for teens. Have you ever asked your teen for an apology and got, "SORRY" or "SORRY you think I’m an idiot." or "SORRY that you are so sensitive." This is an insincere apology and doesn't make you feel a...
Oct 28, 2019•22 min•Ep. 50
Today we are going to talk about how to help your teen figure out what's next after High School. Are there any moms out there that have teens who have no idea what they want to do after High School? I'm sure a lot of you do. Have you noticed how much drama comes from questioning or talking with your teen about the future? I frequently see these big decisions, like, what am I going to do after high school, stirs up a lot of anxiety. Therefore this anxiety can make it hard to have a conversation w...
Oct 21, 2019•34 min•Ep. 49
Okay, in this podcast we are going to get real. Is it possible to be happy and be a mom of a preteen or teenager? And when I say happy, I mean are you truly happy? One definition of happy says, "feeling pleasure and enjoyment because of your life, situation." Do you feel pleasure and enjoyment in your life? Do you feel pleasure and enjoyment from being a mom? Many moms don't, and it is a source of shame. This episode will look at six guaranteed ways to be an unhappy mom and how to turn that arou...
Oct 14, 2019•30 min•Ep. 48
It's hard to say "no" to an angry, upset, or demanding teen. Moms often feel pushed in the corner and begrudgingly say "yes." But when we do that it's not in the best interest of your teen or you. How do you feel when you say "yes" to your teen when you really wanted to say "no." I know from personal experience and from listening to thousands of moms that it doesn't feel good. You second guess yourself. You stress and worry. You feel disempowered as a mom. And you feel your teen is not protected...
Oct 07, 2019•29 min•Ep. 47
Often moms are told to "not take things personally," which could be said by a well-meaning spouse. Sometimes those words are said to shut down the conversation that mom desperately needs to have. Well, that's not helpful. However in this episode we are going to explore "it’s not personal." My intention is not to minimize mom's experience, it is to help protect mom's heart and energy. "Taking things personally" can cause so much anxiety, hurt, anguish, sadness, suffering and just sucks the life o...
Sep 30, 2019•28 min•Ep. 46
Do you ever wake up and wonder, "How good can the teenage years get?" or do you think, "How am I going to survive the teenage years?" Many moms just wonder how they are going to survive the teenage years. And that's no surprise since this is one of the most challenging times to parent teens. The problem is, human beings have a propensity to remember only the negative. We can forget that we have good moments with our teens. The negative experiences can erase the positive experiences from our memo...
Sep 18, 2019•23 min•Ep. 45
Does your teen stress you out? If you have a normal teenager then the answer should be yes and the reason for that is where they are developmentally and I talk about the science behind that in the podcast. So yes your teen will stress you out. The better question is how often does your teen stress you out and to what degree? In other words whats the intensity of the stress you feel. In this episode I go into the major categories of what stresses parents out like monitoring, worrying about their ...
Sep 09, 2019•27 min•Ep. 44
Today we are going to talk about the "4 Steps to Creating the Routine You Want". This is crucial to establish routines that work for you and your family this new school year. It's easy to think that you are starting your year off with a blank slate, but it is never a blank slate. Here’s why. The truth is that the same issues and struggles that drove your crazy last year are going to reappear this year. And why is that? Patterns repeat. Your son and daughter will do what they normally do and then...
Aug 26, 2019•26 min•Ep. 43
The new school year is starting soon or may have already started. Before the year takes off at full time speed, I want to discuss why intentional downtime is a big deal. With our busy schedules downtime is not going to happen naturally, you have to be intentional. Downtime is a pressure-free zone. It's non-productive time. There is no competition or comparing yourself to others . There is no pressure to get anything done. There is no agenda. There is nothing hanging over your head. Downtime allo...
Aug 19, 2019•30 min•Ep. 42
Has your teen ever said anything like, "Mom you are the only one who won't let me . . ." or "Everyone else is doing it so why can't I . . .?" If they have, congratulations you have a normal teenager. Teens from all over the planet use tactics like these to try to manipulate you to get their way. In this episode will look at the many different tactics that teen use. These teenage tactics only work when we are not 100% clear if we are making the right decision. These tactics can open the door to a...
Jun 17, 2019•27 min•Ep. 41
In this episode we'll discuss why curiosity makes you a better human being and parent. You’ll learn how healthy curiosity dials down the drama, and improves your relationship with your teen. Healthy curiosity is the secret ingredient to a well-lived life. Curiosity makes us feel alive, leads to more happiness, boosts achievement and creativity, expands our empathy and strengthens our relationships. Walt Disney once said, “We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because w...
Jun 03, 2019•33 min•Ep. 40
I hope that Mothers' Day was all that you hoped it would be. But if you ended up disappointed, you are definitely not the only one. Heres the problem with Mother's day. I think you come to that day with huge expectations that your kids and partner will somehow make up for everything that was not right in the past year. Realistically on Mother's Day you are still dealing with teen issues and are in the kitchen cooking a meal for your mom or your mother in law. Even on Mother's Day it's hard to ha...
May 13, 2019•29 min•Ep. 39
Whenever I speak to moms I tell them, "This is one of the most challenging times to raise a teen." A huge reason for this is navigating through the treacherous waters of cell phones, social media, and internet with teenagers. Most parents are blind sided with their teens about all thing digital because we didn’t go through this when we were teens. It feels like the iPhone has been around forever but actually it was released in 2007. So your mom didn’t have to deal with these cyber space issues w...
May 06, 2019•34 min•Ep. 38
I think what's challenging and perplexing about parenting is that your child/ teen can feel like a moving target---or you could say a growing target. You feel like you finally have mastered one stage and then your teen grows out of it and you are up against the next stage. This new phase has new dynamics to figure out and its own set of perils. Every time you turn a corner, there is new terrain to manage. You finally have elementary school down and then they are off to middle school. You finally...
Apr 08, 2019•29 min•Ep. 37
I hear parents second guess themselves saying things like, "I wasn't hard enough on him," or " I was too soft on her." And what they are really talking about is their parenting approach in regards to discipline. The challenge about parenting is "one approach doesn't fit all." I have seen parents come into my private practice baffled because the first two kids sailed through the teenage years with no problems, but their third kid who now is a teenager is driving them crazy. Why is that? They are ...
Apr 01, 2019•29 min•Ep. 36
How do you foster your child/teen's creativity? Expressing your creativity through art, dance, writing, film and music is an excellent way to develop the teenage brain. The brain is having a major growth spurt during the teenage years. It is a season where you use it or lose it, meaning that neurons that are not used wither away. Neurons that are used wire into the teenage brain. It is the easiest time to learn a new language or a piano concerto. There are many challenges parent face when trying...
Mar 11, 2019•29 min•Ep. 35
My friend sent me a post that said, "Check on your friends with strong willed daughters. We are not ok." I laughed but what really struck me is how many thousands of moms had shared it. Obviously it struck a chord. A strong willed daughter has an upside and then the shadow or dark side. Think of it as different sides of the same coin. Really we want a strong willed daughter. Strong: Having great physical, moral, and intellectual power. Will: used to express desire, choice, willingness, consent, ...
Mar 04, 2019•29 min•Ep. 34
You need to be prepared when your teen has their first big break up. Parents see the worst version of their teen after a breakup. This makes it hard for you to help your teen and console them. They are angry and shut down. They can lash out at you. They are edgy and negative. They lose their motivation. They don't want to pick up their room, do their chores, or their homework. Helping your son or daughter successfully work through a big break up is extremely important. They will end up either wo...
Feb 25, 2019•27 min•Ep. 33
Why is it that you can be a CEO of a company and feel on top of the world and yet a sassy teenager can bring you to your knees. Why is it that moms of middle school and high school teens rarely wake up and think, "Wow, I am a successful mom. I'm rocking it with these teens." What is a successful mom? The important question is who or what is answering the question. There is a cultural definition of a successful mom that looks a-lot like a perfect mom. These implicit messages from the culture info...
Feb 18, 2019•27 min•Ep. 32
In this episode I interview my friend and colleague Angela Caughlin, MA. Angela is an expert on how journaling can help you find your inner parenting wisdom. She has lived her message. When recently widowed she had to raise three children by herself. Angela has authored four books on different aspects of journaling. Angela is an Integrative Coach, which means she uses a holistic approach that integrates with other modalities of treatment during her coaching or counseling sessions. Angela’s integ...
Feb 11, 2019•41 min•Ep. 31
What do I mean by a hard conversation? Basically it's any conversation your teen doesn't want to have with you---and there are a-lot of those. In this episode I give you 5 key elements to help you have a (successful) hard conversation with your teen. 1. You want to balance the hard conversations with intentionally having positive conversations/experiences with your teen. 2. Timing has to be right. Bottom line is that if either you or your teen are emotionally flooded or have been drinking or hig...
Feb 04, 2019•30 min•Ep. 30
Every mom worries. You can't eliminate worry. Parenting a teen gives you endless things to worry about. Worry can be useful if it leads to effective action. But too often worry is just wasted energy. It doesn't lead to solutions it just leads to more worry and before you know it the worry grows exponentially like a wildfire. You don't want worry dominating your life and your parenting. Don't let worry control you; you can control the worry. A worried mom lives in a state of worry where her actio...
Jan 28, 2019•33 min•Ep. 29
Power Your Parenting: Moms with Teens is back. This is going to be an exciting year. I have lined up some great guests and of course I will be sharing some practical parenting tips and sharing current research on teens. One of my primary goals is to raise the bar on what's possible for moms and teens. You don't have to dread these years. You can actually enjoy them. In this podcast I first answer the question, "Why am I hosting a podcast on moms and teens?" Was I the perfect mom with the perfect...
Jan 21, 2019•25 min•Ep. 29
