The IT Factor

My younger years. I was just like doing too much.

Why because, like I said, doing like a reference, you.

Know when you faced own ass up, You just doing too much, throwing that ass back and like, yeah nothing knowing I'm not, I don't feel nothing. I'm not. Oh it just.

Like the herbal essences coming. Yes, that used to be me and what they used to be doing. L I'm meant nothing.

I'm beating it up and I used to be I would be like you actually not you actually not be nothing.

That's what I'm saying.

I was a performer, was it because you wanted them to go around to like go tell people like.

Oh yeah, but go brag about that time? How a week?

Go brag about it?

What's up?

Y'all's show girl Alex Pete and it's your girl draining the cold And you.

Are tuned in to another episode of poor.

Mind, where a drunk mind speaks sober thoughts.

We ain't got no gifts today, we ain't got no guests today. You know that in their seats jumping up and down because they love to hear that.

I mean, And lately we've been having a lot of guests we have. Don't blame them, but it's a blessing. It is. I love having guests I'm doing.

It's great to get other people's perspective, you know, hear their thoughts and it's just a good time. Like I feel like we have rarely ever had guests on Poor Minds where it was like not goodbye, like you don't mean a few that I wasn't that fond of.

Absolutely, okay, okay, but it's way.

More people that I loved and then people that I didn't. I think that that's probably only like two. I was just about that we had on the show that I was like, you ain't never got to worry about coming, You ain't got the word bout be, you ain't got to worry about me, baby.

I can agree, because I was about to say there's probably like one or two because I yeah, yeah, what I would say, Like, I just feel this show is just so different because we just bring people out. They shall and they always have them all. So it's very rare.

People come here and don't have a good time.

Yeah, it's always good vibes in a great time. I can't honestly state it.

So we can do a little catch up, you know, what do we know you on y'all what you're doing hard?

Seventy five? Seventy five? Are I am? I am still going at I am. I'm one day forty one. Good job.

Oh yeah, so I got thirty four more days. I'll be done, really so are we?

Yeah? Oh yeah, I'm excited. That's really it though.

Like I said, I feel like when you be doing challenges and detoxes and stuff, your life's just be pretty born, like, cause what are you doing? Like, I don't really go out to eat because I'm eating really clean, so I can't really go and if I'm just gonna eat salmon and broccoli everywhere I go every That's what I'm saying, I could just cook that at home and eat it at home. So I don't really go out to eat. I'm not drinking, so I haven't really went to like

There that I was like, Oh, maybe I'll go do that.

Talk to like Bloggie, there's a Tacos and tequila coming up in Atlanta.

I'm in that hole.

Yeah, see and I would go to there, but it's like I can't eat the tacos or drink.

You canna have a chicken taco.

I don't eat cheeky. You can have a salmon taco. Salmon tacos is all going for me. You can have a fish choco. You like fish tacos. You like fish tacos be ordered.

I don't really like them though, Like I'll order it if that's all that's on the meaning. And I go to like a Mexican restaurant, but I prefer steak or cheek okay or something like you know, maybe what's something back eating steak?

Yeah, we can, we can hit it well, I'm gonna hit it up for you. I'll get some footage for you.

Get you know what I'm saying, Okayer, Because I'm Finnna go. I have been seeing that, like little events pop up on like my timeline. I just have a feeling it's gonna be a really great summer. I have gotten my holiday weight off of me. I'm just feeling good. I'm back outside and yeah, I'm just looking really forward to the summer and everything we have coming up. And I don't know, I just have a good my spirit.

Is high again. I don't know.

I don't know what it is about them fall and winter months, but I'll be struggling so bad, and then I'm kind of like I'm starting to get out of my little funk, you know what I'm saying.

But because you know, when that sun's out, buns up, I love the song.

I mean, I don't know, like I always say, maybe it's just because I was born in the spring, so like I be waiting for day like saving like I cannot wait for day like saving times when it hit and E known he had already, so we all saw.

Yeah, we all saw for sure. It's gonna be a fun summer.

Yeah, I'm excited and I'm gonna be done with my detop.

That's but I'm only on girl. I'm only drinking.

But I'm not drinking shots and stuff no more, Like I can't do it.

It's not for me.

I'm trying to be fine for I want to be like fifty sixty and fine as fuck.

So I just feel like, you know, a.

Little shots for a celebration, it's cool, but you're gonna stick to the champagne one.

But I'm really gonna try to like just stick to champagne. Wow, I'm gonna be a champagne wine girl.

So before we get into the topics, it was crazy because we had somebody's tweet about us that we want on the show.

Were gonna get him on the show?

Raymonds tweeted he said poor Minds is the best podcast out and it's not up for debate, and he.

Know what the fuck going on?

Shout out to Raymond, say, I love I always say that, but yeah, like.

Dun you know what I think it is though, because I'm not gonna lie.

We've been on a lot.

Of people's podcasts and I'm gonna tell y'all, this energy is just different.

It is.

It's really real conversation and it's just like, I don't know. I always say conversation is a skill, and a lot of people don't have that skill, like just like playing football is a skill. Yeah, we really, we really shocking Kobe and this motherfucker bag.

You know what I'm saying. I'm not lying, tell you, I just you know, it's given what what was the other one? MJ is got it. That's a good one. That's they used to play together. That was before my time. But it don't matter. At all. It was. It was. But what I'm saying is, when it all is said and.

Done, I was a kid, you was a tiny tode, you were a tiny toach. But what I'm saying, when it's all said and done, they're gonna remember on name m hm because we deserve it.

Oh okay, okay, you you lie here.

Okay, time was into it to what you've been up to, and you deserve it all. She I'm on that same tip, though, I deserve it all and more, don't it.

Okay, that's the mission. That's the motive. My Dodgers Blue. What's up?

Gas? Set up our girl? You know what I'm saying. We flourishing this year. It's a it's.

Gonna be a good year. Like we definitely have a lot of exciting things coming up. I feel like we say that every episode. They probably like b she spitted out, what is au easy? Y'all say this ship everybody episode. But the great thing is every episode, y'all getting closer and closer to us telling.

Y'all what it is.

Look that.

That's the gag. We're getting closer and closes.

Okay, closer too much?

Oh my fucking guy, Bro, that's literally five worst songs ever created?

So much.

Get it like girl, give me a fucking break.

Oh my gosh, I told you somebody on Twitter I called me a demon because I said I didn't like this song. Okay, I'm like, you are a fucking demon who doesn't like this.

I don't like it either. But can I make a confession? Why there's a song said not my intrusive thoughts coming out?

I beat your ass?

I have wait, I have a song that I don't.

Like, and I thought it was a safe space to say it.

So I don't even know why I'm admitting this right now. I hate this song.

When they played in the club at the end of the night, I get pissed.

What I won't a dance?

I love that song? Oh my god, now you wildin with it? I hate that's a class.

I hate it? Yeah, baby, yeah, that's all. That is? Such a song, you know what? Just for that?

Were singing it for carry OUs Please don't sing it for carry Out, bro.

I hate and I love him.

I love him down yes, and we saw him in concert and let me tell you, yes in New Orleans for essence.

Where the It's like I be there, But where do I be but I'm not here.

I'm there, but I'm not there because I don't know, or maybe I was just drunk.

We was drunk.

We was drunk. Remember when Sha was drunk. Shane says, she ain't drank nothing since Noor.

No, I have not seen Shane put up She said, I'm not losing my job. Shane has not put a piece of liquor, not even a piece of liquor to her mouth in front of me since New Orleans. But we had a time we didn't remember. Thad called us to yell, but we had a ball that was like, hey, ladies.

Uh.

I wanted to get y'all both on the phone because yeah, we had people show up for y'all, and you know what I'm saying, y'all.

Y'all said y'all was gonna be there. He did try to shut that we was, but we need that. We do need it.

Yeah, we missed the j Jackson concert. I know we was drunk. Everybody just was over New Orleans. You have to be drunk in New Orleans.

So like as Marty Gra going on right now.

Rodeo going on, Marty Gra going on, I missed the cookout because I had to do some work with my homegirl. I've been helping her with her project, so I couldn't go to the cookout, which I was really sad about.

It'll be another one. It's one every year, I know. I just really wanted to go this year the.

Cook I'll be fun though, but I'm definitely gonna go to the rodeo before it end.

Yeah, I'm going to the rodeo for sure. I'm not missing it.

Shout out to Houston Ticks.

Shout out to Houston Htown. Okay, go ahead with the first top of the little dryer. What's up y'all at your Girl XP and it's your Girls dry and the call. And if you have an online business, we're gonna tell you how to make your business flow really really easy and get your money quick with squarespace dot com.

Squarespace is amazing because they use cutting edge AI technologies to help you design a website that is tailed to your unique needs for your business. And I also love that they offer so many different payment mythis that you can offer your customers like Clarinet, after pay, Apple pay and more.

Yes, they make it a one stop shop for everything. So however you monetize your content, whether it's videos, blogs, books, whatever you sell, They're gonna make it easy for you to do by gatekeeping it so you have to have access to all of that content. So what you're gonna do is go to squarespace dot com backslash poor minds and get ten percent off of your website or domain.

What's up, y'all? As your Girl XP and it's your girl draina call and we have a.

Very exciting announcement today.

We have a brand new show dropping Yes spot. We have a brand new showtdropping y'all on Patreon. It's gonna air on September second, and it's called Poor Chronicles. We're gonna be doing so much stuff on there. We're gonna be doing challenges. If you can't go to Billadoche, where the hell could you go?

If you can't go to belloonche what the hell.

We're gonna be doing? Talk to me chit chat with me. We're gonna be spelling a little tea. Oh my god, No, you didn't.

Go everything y'all been wanting to see. We're gonna be doing it right here on Patreon.

Yes, y'all ask us for so much.

Well, we've been to give it to y'all every single Monday, and it's gonna be a time.

Y'all know, Poor Minds has grown into its own little entity. Well, we're gonna have a lot of fun still over here at poor Chronicles.

So make sure y'all tune in September second it's going down.

Thanks for the first topic. I really wanted to talk about lucky gross syndrome. You know, like, have you ever had something fall in your lap with no effort and you didn't really have to go hard to giddy? I think some people think that, Like I think people probably could look at us and probably think we're just lucky. You know that's not true though, I mean it might not be true, but you know, everything is about perception.

Life isn't there.

So how do you feel about the concept of being lucky, because then you have people who don't even believe luck is a real thing.

Like you have people who believe.

That everything you get in life is a result of the work that you put in.

So I believe in look I do, Okay, I believe in luck.

I believe sometimes the chance happening. Things happen, right, I think sometimes, like I'll use social media for example, right, a lot of times somebody will have a viral moment, like the Hawk Tour girl will use her for example, you know what I'm talking about? Probably not, I know, I know, I know, AUNTI gonna cat you. Well, Auntie

So this girl had.

This viral moment and she started a podcast, got all these brand deals. I mean, she's at these festivals, hosting, doing interviews, you know what I'm saying. So I think that luck is a real thing, because who in that moment, like you know you do. We do funny shit all the time, and some things go viral and sometimes they don't. But sometimes things just hit. So I do think that is what luck is like, sometimes things just hit and

So luck is cool.

You know, I might get lucky and hit the lottery and get five million dollars, But what's luck if I don't know how to keep that five million dollars? So luck is cool, But what you're gonna do with that.

That's fair.

I mean, I definitely feel like, I don't know, I feel like it's a.

Mixture of both.

To me, it's definitely like what you said, it's some people just kind of happen to be in the right place at the right time. But it's about what you're going to do with it, because yeah, you got this opportunity, but if you didn't maximize it, it just doesn't really matter, right.

And a lot of people, I hate to say this, and it's no shade, no see, but a lot of people like they really aren't talented. So y'all have somebody who has like a little viral moment or somebody who are not even talented, I'll say, or have the skills skills. I'll use the word skills because I want to use other examples, like somebody who come up on some money.

So luck is cool.

But I would rather have the skill and the opportunity if I had to choose out of that three, if you got to choose one out of the three or two out of the three, luck, I don't need luck to make shit happen. Luck is cool, but so lucky girl syndrome is a thing.

I think that you definitely should want to have the skill and the opportunity for sure over having Look, but you know, I don't know, I think I have. I think I'm kind of lucky when I really think about it. Yeah, because I feel like a lot of stuff that be happening to me, or that has happened to me, it doesn't happen to like every average person, or it doesn't

Anything could happen to anybody at any moment.

But I don't think I would ever be a person who gets a million dollars and ends up broken just because I know what to do with I'm gonna figure out what to do with it. Yeah, even if I don't, I know, I'm gonna figure out what to do with it. I think people people don't realize. And it's not to say that a million dollars is not a lot of money, because it is a lot of money. But I think that when people see that kind of money in their bank account and they've never seen that before, they be like, Oh,

Like taking fifty dollar vacation.

Yeah, taking fifty thousand dollar vacations, going to Louis, going to Chaneill's, splurgeing, buying like two hundred thousand dollars worth of stuff.

That's craziness. You need to figure. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

I mean, and nothing and even with that for example, because it's like do nice things for yourselff. If you get a million dollars, Yeah, buy yourself a barking that's fifteen thou twenty thousand, maybe thirty thousand dollars one. No, don't go by teams. Yeah, you get what I'm saying. Like, it's just all about what you do when you have opportunities.

God right, I agree. Do you remember a song Lucky by Britney Spears. She's lucky, she's a star.

See talking about that.

As soon as she asked the question, I was over here singing it.

She akes up, there's a knock, knock knock on the do.

And see we could do we But I don't know. I cannot believe.

I don't know.

Lucky Lucky was a story and I think it was like Britney Spear, the girl's name was Lucky and she was like a Hollywood star. Yeah, like Brittany played the character in the music video and the girl's name was Lucky, and she was like a Hollywood star. But you know all that glitters that ain't gold. You know what I'm saying. It was a it's such a good song.

Shout out to my girl, brit Yeah, they don't you know she likes to dance.

In them panties And we're gonna talk about it every week, But she really gave us some box do we not gonna talk about it every week?

Actually, this probably would be the last time, if I'm being completely hony. What you think about lucky girl syndrome, Well, to quote the great Queen Oki manad period, no, I'm not lucky. I'm blessed, yes, but no, for real, I agree with you on the three categories. I would change blessed to lucky for me because that's just me and

You know what I mean?

I feel like I'm always going out into the world treating people how I want to be treated, right.

I don't do bad by people.

I always try to do good by everybody, even if situations don't work out. I'm not even like a getback person. I feel like life's gonna get you back. God gonna get you bad. God be doing all of my Yeah, I don't have to worry about those things.

I just move on with my life.

And I feel like, because I've always been that type of person, that's why blessings look as you know, some people might want to call it flows into my life all the time because it's about what you put out.

Some people are terrible fucking people.

And then they wonder why, and if I'm really being honest, people who bad stuff always be happening too, I kind of just do always look at them and be like I.

Stupumping at myself.

Yeah, because why is something bad always happening?

And why are you always going through it? Why?

And especially when it be situations that I feel like sometimes are like avoidable, you know what I mean? But you always going through something? You the common denominator. You're not unlucky. It's just about the decisions and actions that you be making.

That's why your life is going the way.

So I do want to make a point to what Ta said, because she said she will change lucky and blessed, cause I feel like, no, I'm not lucky because when I look at luck, I look at like a once in a lifetime opportunity happening that don't happen to me. I'm not lucky, Like I'm not lucky at all, a lottery Yeah, stuff like I never just like walk across the mall, the man be like, oh, let me come by you with you now. I'm not lucky, Like I'm not lucky. My shit be fucked up. It's never me,

Blessings don't happen to bed.

Yeah, I'm sorry. Blessings don't happen to bad people. Luck can happen to the worst person. The worst person you know can hit the lottery tomorrow, the worst person you know could get something like a random viral moment and you see them on TV everywhere and see.

That's why I do feel like they're interchangeable. Because blessings don't always come from God neither. It depends on if you really want to get deep into the spiritual bag. Sometimes blessings don't be coming from Him, they coming from other places.

Yep.

I think everybody can get blessings. I do feel like they're interchangeable. I agree with you. I think look and blessings are interchangeable because I think even with blessings, people can sometimes look at your blessings and be like, oh my god, that's a once in a lifetime opportunity. I could never see something like that happening for me. It just depends on people's perspective in their religious background, because some people are not religious, so they gonna look at

It to happen, right, And I agree with you on that because because God will really try to guide you if you pay attention, because like you said, blessings cannot

You know what I'm saying.

So I definitely do agree with you on that. But like I said, I feel like when I think about like me being unlucky, like I said, I just don't feel like things happen for me like oh, a viral moment, and it's just like, oh, I'm on TV because you see some people who go viral. Next thing, you know, they on the red carpet at the Oscars doing interviews like the stuff like that.

You know, don't really like if.

We get on the Oscars and we interview and it's because, nigga, we've been fucking working for six years to get there, you know what I mean.

So I guess that's what I mean.

But I can't. I can say I'm blessed. But that's an interesting that wasn't even the topic.

But yeah, I mean because the way I look at it too, is like sometimes a person will do something and it will go viral, but they've been.

Hustling for a long time.

So I feel like sometimes even with these people who will finally go viral, they've been doing that shit for a long time, Like that that influencer that had that classy very classy. Yes, they Lebron had been doing content for a really, really long time. So it's kind of like, is that look like, yeah, it took him out of there or her out of there.

I don't know what they go by.

But like it took them out of there, but they have been putting the work in.

Yeah, and so it's like, can you really call that look?

Well, not with that person particularly, but like if you think of like a bad baby, but she.

Said catch me outside.

How about that she was on Doctor Phild being a badass white girl and then she but what she did, but it took that look and she turn it into an opportunity. So you know, that's what I'm saying. It's a difference between that versus the hot tour girl. She had the opportunity to make it into something that she didn't because she didn't have the skill to me personally, you know what I'm saying.

I mean that's why I don't. I don't know who that is. Yeah, exactly, exactly, That's what I'm saying, Like.

That, what do these people know who she is? If they watching? Yeah, you know, I like to get into this news sometimes.

Because sometimes I feel like, yeah, if no, if it was a big moment like that, everybody should know about it.

Well this is the thing though, so what's crazy about it? Is that be the difference between like mainstream media because it was very mainstream, but the.

Things that get mainstream.

Is this like they gonna talk about it all Like I said, I'm not kidding. It was everywhere and when was this was this? Like yeah, it was like what last year or maybe the year before last? And then she started a podcast, she signed with barstool.

It was like a whole big fiend. What happened to her pocket?

I think she just stopped it because something happened where she started, not a bitcoin. She got into something with bitcoin and told what everybody to invest and then she ended up pulling out. So it's like a whole bunch of legal stuff she's.

Going through right now.

But she's like in hiatus right now basically, So either way it goes, like I said, But a lot of that blessing and opportunity and luck stuff that we go into, that's another topic that we talked about before. It's different for this than it is for this too. At the same time, you know what I'm saying.

That's that's definitely a fair argument, because I mean, it is what it is.

We just have to work a little harder for things that they don't have to work as hard.

For right, right, right.

But I do think lucky girl syndrome is a thing. I think some people really just are lucky.

I don't. I don't know, because I just.

You know, how I be feeling about these topics. I just always kind of feel like sometimes it just really be about what you do, though, like what you do with your life and the type of person that you are, because I don't necessarily think that I believe that anybody just gets anything because they're looking.

Well, that's what I'm saying. That's the difference for me. I think if somebody has blessings in their life, that's because they're putting good in the world and they're getting good back. Luck can happen to anybody. Blessings happen to the good people. That's the difference for me, That's what I was saying. Yeah, so I do think lucky girl syndrome is a thing because luck can happen to anybody.

I feel like blessings only.

Happen to the blessed. Okay, you know what I'm saying.

Like chance, yes, like yes, fifty chance whatever, right, right.

So I guess that's what I'm saying. Like, like I said, I don't feel I'm lucky at all, because not because I'm a bad person, just because I don't.

Luck don't be on my side for some reason.

But blessings, oh baby, God don't show up for me every time when it comes to the blessing time. All right, drinking today while we drank.

It's good. I'm almost good. I'm glad you like it. So, since we're like into the spring, spring gets sprung.

We're talking about blessings and luck and opportunity. This one is gonna be called Everything's coming up roses, okay, And so what we have in it. We have some grapefruit, We have some lemons, some lime, some lavender syrup, and then I have some high biscuits syrup.

Floated at the bottom.

And then we garnish it with three dehydrated rosebuds, a very floral, very light, very spring.

And this is Everything's coming up roses. Cheer. I love that rosebud.

That used to be the the cheek cold for SAMs to get a lot of money.

It did because I used to play some I love sims girl. I used to play all the time on my little desktop computer. That and I used to be barning CDs online mark Ooh.

I wish I still had them CDs. I'm sure somewhere at my mama house.

I could probably find mine because my mama keeps everything, so I'm sure they in some box.

Some will in the beginning of the year.

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Training a call and I'm Lexi, and together we are travelings.

From Charleston to the streets of Cardaina.

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Eight, on the People Who keep everything.

My sister is like that, and she had a time capsule from high school. Real I wish I would have had something like that, a time capsule.

My best friend Jazmine is like that.

She has like photo albums, like ten photo albums full of like pictures of us from high school, from colleague, like literally and like I'm talking about y'all, like.

Books and books and books.

She'd still be wearing her high school t shirts period when she.

Go to sleep and stuff.

Like when I'll get on FaceTime with her, she'd be having on our two thousand and five homecoming in two I mean not two thousand and five, two thousand and six homecoming T shirt, and I'd be like, how do you still have that? Like get rid of so much stuff? And I wish that I kept stuff too, But like that's why I'd be glad I got her, because I'd be like, if anything grew up copy there.

Yeah, my sister's like that. She's like a pack ride. She keeps everything. But I'm so happy that she's like that because she has so much stuff. Like my mom was good with pictures too, so we have like so many pictures of when I was little. Now what I wish I had a video camera when I was little and I used to record everything. I wish I had those videos. I don't know where they are because I used to record. I was vlogging before vlogging was a fiend.

Imagine we had I cloud makes. Oh your food, yes.

I would have all of it. Talk, how are you a pack rad?

Are you?

I've been getting rid of a lot of stuff, like kept a lot of my mom's stuff and actually pastations helping me get rid of a lot of stuff.

Oh my gosh.

But I'm getting better because now I want to be a little bit just more minimalistic instead of holding everything. But I remember we had like those digital cameras with the floppy disk.

Yes, like we had those. Yes, everything used to be there.

Yeah, I wish I still had my old digital camera from like high school and stuff. But I don't know where they said, because what was the name of that little website where everybody used to upload their pictures? I cannot remember what it was called. Remember, yes, I cannot remember what it was called. But huh no, tumbler it No, it was just like a website where you could just

Right, that's all saying about my space. My Space is still up, but I had deleted my mos space. I remember, but I'm like, why did I do that?

Yeah? That could have been like something I just kept up when we be young. You just don't be thinking about that.

You got the people who do, like your sister, yes, and like me, because I wish I was thinking like that big then.

Like, I have a.

Friend she literally has all of our yearbooks from kindergarten until we graduated, every single year.

Now I do have all my yearbooks from high school.

Yeah I don't have I have like two from high school. Yeah they had.

Well, all my stuff is at my mom house, but she have all my well, she has all my pictures from like kindergarten up until I graduated from college. And then she has all of my yearbooks from high school. And then my mom even have all her yearbooks from high school.

Yeah, that's the see my mom had her I think I have one or two yearbooks from my mom's high school.

Babe.

They used to love them afros.

See when my mama was in high school, they used to do it a little silk prissy, she ain't they had afros.

It was like, so when my mom was in high school, it was when they were trance. They were doing they were doing afros, but they started doing the Jerry curls. Okay, so like half of the yearbook got afros and half of them got Jerry curls. So they were making that transition to ooh, my mama, shit used.

To be juicy.

What that's the only thing about Jerry curls. I'm like, how did people used to wear their hell like they like?

Every juice? Everything you lean on something you lean mark juicy. You know what let your song blow? I guess and what it is.

It's like my mom, I don't think she ever grew out of it, because she still used to make her hair real, Yes, because my mom, like she had like really curly hair. Like my hair is like I have like four C hair. My mom had like four A four B, so hers is a little curlier than mine.

But I mean she loved it juice down. I mean she would have a little dripping.

I mean, I do feel like you gotta keep it moisturized, girl, to keep your hair moisturized.

Nobody want to know dry.

I used to call a juicy crab chap all of that. Why juicy crab? Because it was juicy hen you met? No, that's not the right song to sing. Talking another shot, Yes, all right, we're gonna move on.

To the topic too.

So the second today, and this kind of ties into what we were just talking about. It's cloud more important than talent and how social media has changed success. So do you think the industry still respects real talent or is it all about engagement in numbers now? So I do want to give an example because I saw this when I was kind of like doing a little research on this topic.

Somebody said, nowadays you have.

People like like an Addison Ray or a what's her name Charlie d'millio, and they're extremely popular on teeps talking. They're in movies and I'm not talking about regular movies, like they're in like these A list movies, right because of their audience that can bring in. But they're not necessarily talented. So they feel like if Halle Berry was coming up in twenty twenty five, would she be Halle Berry in twenty twenty five because maybe she doesn't have a following, you know what I'm saying.

So, how do you feel this cloud?

Is cloud more important than talent in twenty twenty five?

No, I don't think so, because it's so many people who have blown up over the past few years and they didn't have a following, you know what I mean.

I don't think talent matters, okay.

Necessarily, but I don't think it's about cloud because, like I said, a lot of people don't have that huge following and then oh you got discovered.

Now you do have the people like that.

But a lot of the time, for me, it's more a lack of talent, Like people just are not talented and they just be blowing up for doing the bare minimum so in the career path that they choose, and like, your music not that great, but you still blew up on kind of way. Your accent not that great, but

But halle Berry is a great action. Yeah.

Well she said that that hindered her, her beauty hindered her back.

I can believe that because people probably you didn't take her series rights. I think people don't never look at beauty from that standpoint, Like people look at beautiful people kind of like what we were just talking about in the first topic, Oh, they so lucky because you're beautiful, But people don't never think how think about how sometimes being overly attractive can like hinder you because people won't take you serious and certain positions.

So I one hundred percent agree with you, But I also think, like y'all just be complaining and y'all not working hard enough, because a lot of times people be like, oh, I don't have a following, so I'm not gonna get cast for this movie. No you're not getting cast before the movie, because yeah, you're probably not. I mean, I told y'all I took, I'm taking acting classes.

I'm big, not good.

Ain't nobody finna put me in a movie just because poor mind's be doing one point three million views a month.

I mean they might, though it ain't happen yet.

I mean it haven't happened yet, but they it might because it's a lot of people who have got cast it in right and cast it in TV rolls just because they have a following, a following on social media.

So I do agree that that does happen, Like people get cast it for roles just because they're, like, I want their fan base.

I say this all the time.

I truly believe, like Tyler Perry had put Kim Kardashian in that movie what was it, Confessions of a Temptations, Like, you know, Kim only had a few lines, and they were advertising it like she's gonna be in a whole movie and she had like a few lines.

She didn't do bad.

It wasn't like she was terrible, but she didn't have much to carry or much to do. But he did that as a strategy because Kim Kardashian, her star was going up at the time. So I do believe that people get casted in certain movies because of their fan base. But for the people who feel like they're not getting casted because they don't have a following or their song is not blowing up because they don't have a following. Do these industry people care about a following, Yes, they do.

But I truly believe that if you were talented and.

You got that it factor and you have that work ethic, it's gonna happen for you. So I don't like when people be like, I don't have a following, so I'm not it's not gonna it's not happening for me because I'm good and I'm great, but I don't have a following, so I'm not gonna get.

Picked, or maybe it's just not in your path.

I feel like people be feeling to realize that stuff too, Like sometimes just because it's top faith over here yet I mean for real though, Like I think it's so many people in this world who want to do things that don't align with the plan for them, you know what I mean? And especially kind of because I know

Even like a lot of times we'll see people who are amazing singers. You'll see people who sting back up for somebody and they sing better than the actual singer. But what y'all have to realize too, is like we don't know what that it factor is, but you either have it or you don't. That's why we see a lot of people. People can say all day up and down, use again, Britney Spears cannot sing, but she had that it factor, you know what I'm saying. Like people say

They say that about Beyonce, which I think is out.

Now that's a little different. J Lo can't sing. But let me tell you what she can do. She can make a mom calm out her mother ass.

Yeah she can because that was more of her calling, right, But you can't.

But at the same time, but you can't say wedding bulgn.

No.

My song was if you my loving that day? Do y'all remember what I mean? She made head ellie.

Remember she started off at the backup dancer on in Living Color.

So she worked her way up.

Into each of these different dancing to singing to acting.

Yes she did, because her breakout thing was Selena and the lady that they were trying to cast for Selena. Something had happened with her. She didn't get casted, so it wasn't even supposed to be j Lo.

Yeah, and she ate that up. She that Selena rolled up.

You know, they made a list of people who should have gotten oscars who didn't. They did no, no, they just didn't win. So Jyl was on there for Selena. Angela Bassett was on there for Tina Turner, Heath Ledger was on there for Broke Back Mountain.

It was actually a.

Really good list and I was surprised that these people didn't win. Yeah, Oscar for the role, but Jaylo definitely deserved Oscar for Selena.

No, she ate that up. She really did.

She did her because that was probably one of my faceite dude, hell, why are you making asks?

That's what she would do because that's how so listen.

They talked about j Loo doing that with her lips and poking her lips out like that.

They're like she was doing too much.

If you look up Selena singing, Selena used to do the same thing. I mean, Jlo studied down for that role.

I mean it was like that was one of her best acting ms and made in Manhattan. Yeah, but I also liked enough. I feel like she did a really good job and enough.

She was whooping up boy else she did.

A really good job, like that was a very serious role, and I feel like she cuted like Jlo can really act to me, I feel like, and I don't feel like she can't sing, like I hate.

She can catch a note, yeah, like I hate, but she.

Can't say she can't sing.

I feel like, yeah, she can hold a little now, but it's a lot of people who just can hold an out. But I feel like that's where a lot of other things go into it as far as just having an eat factor, because I feel like even with her that was probably like okay, like she can't just sing, but she can hold, but she can hold a no, she beautiful, she can dim. She had so many other factors that it's like, Okay, this.

Is a start.

What do y'all think the IT factor is? Because nobody has ever defined it? What do y'all think it is? Because I don't think it could be defined, right.

I think it's about your aura though, like people say, like if I come in a room, dang, you just like you change the energy and the energy, and I think it has a lot to do with that, and yeah, combining that with your skill, with like your motivation and stuff.

Like that, I think it's yeah.

I mean some people, like you just view them and you're like wow, yeah, like you're just mesmerized by their presence.

Like some people, you know, just have that.

And I see that a lot when I see people perform, and I'm just not an easily impressed person, but it be some people. I look at I'm like, oh, yeah, she got like and I don't know what it is. I can never explain it. I can never explain it. I don't know.

But y'all have it, like I would say, y'all have it like when I first met y'all, was like, oh okay, Like yeah, yeah, I just think you know what I always say because I hate to be the bereau of bad news, but sometimes I just always feel like it just goes back into life just not being fair. I think that be like a tough reality that a lot

That's why it happened that way, versus I don't know.

Some people, it just don't never happened for them, and I feel like, no matter how hard they try, how much work they put in, it just don't happen, and it just be you know, unfortunate, insad because life just is in.

But I do feel like real talent always finds its way. I'm not trying to be funny, No, because let me tell you why. Real talent finds its way. This is why I say this. Y'all know I always talk about bitch. I thought I was finna be the biggest rapper singer out. I used to go to the studio.

I used to really be in the studio.

Like we laughing because it's funny now, but I really thought I was finna be baby Beyonce.

You couldn't tell me.

I was like, this is what I'm supposed to do, and that was not my But I'm talented in other avenues, so I knew I was gonna be on stage. I don't know what I was gonna be on stage, No, I just didn't know what doing what.

You know what I'm saying.

So I feel like real talent, if you're talented and whatever that may be, singing, dancing, writing, producing, you gonna find.

Your way to where you need to be.

So even though I wasn't on stage, I'm telling y'all, when I was little, me and my friend Jazmine.

Shout out to Jazmine.

I don't want to her last name because y'all be looking up people on Facebook and stuff. So me and Jazz and literally we used to sit in her living room, me and her and Lindsey, and they used to play like they were e news reporters and they used to interview me. Literally every time we would play this game, I would always be the star. So since I was little, I always would see myself on stage, but I didn't

Them for my work. I'm like, what am I doing?

Though, But I'm saying I always saw myself on stage.

I didn't know necessarily was gonna be a podcast, yeah, but I ended up on stage.

So that's why I feel like, when you're really talented and it's ordained for you to share who you are with the world. Like one thing I take pride is that we make people feel good. Y'all can say what y'all want about our topics and what we talk about and what we do, but we make people feel good, and we needed to spread that to the world and give it to the world. So if your talent is supposed to be seen by the world, God gonna make

That's fair. You feel me, I feel you, okay, just making sure you feel me, you feel you know I I do have feel me out now, feel me out, feel me out now.

I do have a different perspexive, but I do. I feel like that's fair.

That's fair. Okay, okay, all right, let us know what y'all think.

Do y'all feel like cloud is more important than talent, and our people with real talent, you know, often looked over for people.

Who have This show is sponsored by Better Help. What's up, y'all is your Girl XP and.

It's your Girl train and the cold and y'all know all the time we're gonna tell y'all about Betterhelp dot Com. We are getting in that area where everybody had their New Year's resolutions, but they're kind of falling off right now. And I know one for me was to stay in therapy and be consistent. So if you are thinking about therapy or you're in therapy right now, stay on track.

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Okay, the only.

Reason I want to bring this up, it's because I got that licking me first of all, And I'm gonna take this moment because you know what, We're gonna start the time right now. Because this motherfucker is a low down, dirty, greasy, thick ass bitch that nobody gives a fuck about. And we are tired, and we are tired of logging on to X and seeing the shit that you have to say, and the day that your mouth is closed forever, it's too soon, because I cannot.

Wait till we never have to hear your thoughts again. Came her you around, Kanye, Yes.

I'm tired.

I'm tired.

I have had enough, and he said something about Slim Thug. He said, Slim Thug, the realist nigga, I know is something like that. I know you watched Poor Mindes with your thick ass. I know you did.

He probably not gonna see these studies, you not, but you never know what he gonna do.

Because he got mad because I sat on the couch and said, you know you lost the Kim Kardashian. You're not getting that again.

I said what I said talking about Slim duff. Slim is a real nigga. I fuck with slimm Kanye.

But I so now it's time to get into the w.

A bow A bow. I cannot wait to talk to you about something when we in this.

Girl.

It's just some tea.

I forgot to tell you, but it just came to mind when when we was talking.

Okay, okay, so I can't wait. I'm excited. Okay.

So the bad topic for today is the wildest excuse you've used.

To get out of bad sex.

Now mm hmm. Have you ever been like mid stroke and you was thinking like how the hell do I get out of here? Or you know, like you take a phone call pretend like, you know, your period just hit.

What do you do?

Like, have you ever been like mid stroke? Would have me and you're like, this is not good, This is not good.

I haven't never been midstroke and felt that way. But I definitely have had to lie to leave just because I don't want to be here no more, like I'm ready to go really go home. So I feel like, yeah, I definitely have had to lie to leave and act like I had to go do something.

I've lied and said I've had emergency.

I done lie on my mama, sorry.

Mine, damn. I So you know what, for me, I've never made it like an excuse like get out of sex, but back in the day, I haven't done this in a very long time. But that's when I used to fake so he would hurry up and nut like I used to pretend like it was just feeling so good, I'm like, oh my.

Gosh, I'm about to come, oh.

Just so it would make him hurry up so it would end quicker.

Like.

So, I've never.

Actually made an excuse, but I feel like a lot of women do that. That goes into like the faking orgasms and faking conversations.

I feel like people be faking so it can end. And see that's the thing, like, nah, I'm not doing it.

Yeah, I'm not doing that now, but in my younger years, in my early twenties.

Even when I was younger. No, if it's bad, we're not having sex on my own. I'm not about to be faking like you need to figure this shit out or you need to go fuck with somebody else. I'm not about to be laying in bed faking with you the whole time over and over, like oh.

No, not over.

It's like if you went through it one time, then that's understandable. But it's like if you keep having bad sex with somebody and faking, that's what t is.

Yeah, now I would say I've never done it to where it's like I keep doing it over and over again. But I can definitely remember times I had sex with somebody and I was faking it just so we would end. Why you ain't just tell them the moment because I didn't want to do I didn't want to do it no more, and I'm not gonna talk to you no more.

That's even better. That's why it's like, move, get off me.

I'm not a vibe killer. Now.

The vibe already bad. Right, you're right, you're right.

I mean, like was never there that clos into me just being young, like to be I'm not.

He was, but that was me going into like you know back. I always talk about this, y'all. When we used to grow up. It would be magazines, Cosmopolitan magazine, how to make him come, how to make orgasm, how to be sexy in the bedroom.

So growing up and viewing sex.

I always looked at it like it's about the man and it's for the man. I never viewed sex as it's for me as well. So every time I was in the bedroom in my younger years, this is why I always say young people don't need to be having sex because.

Y'all not teaching things.

You don't properly understand what we're doing and what we're doing, what it really is.

So yeah, absolutely, in my younger years, I used to feel like I have to perform. I was thinking, like, mister Elli a pussy, don't fail me. Now, I'm trying to turn this nigga out so he don't want nobody else but me and Nolan.

Me. That's beautiful.

No, it's not.

That is no, it's not because you should not.

I know, I agree, but I'm staying that's good kinda that you wanted to be a pleaser like that. I have personally always been a pillow o princess. I have always been a pillow princess. As I've gotten older, now I be like performing because I feel like, if you were in a relationship with your men, you should want to show out for your men, like I should want to go above and beyond for him. When I was younger in my relationships, it was like, no, what you gonna do for Big Mama?

For real?

Exactly?

No.

I was never like I I'm like that now, my hands behind my head, like I'm like that now. But in my younger years, I.

Was just like doing too much? Why because, like I said, doing like a reference, you know when.

You faced down, ass up, you just doing too much, throwing that ass back and like, yeah, not knowing, I'm not, I don't feel nothing, I'm not. Oh it just.

Like the herbal essences coming yes used to be me and what they used to be doing, like yeah, I'm meant nothing, I'm beating it up. And I used to be I would be like you actually not you actually not be.

That's what I'm saying I was a performer, and that's what I'm saying. I used to just make excuses.

And was it because you wanted them to go around and like go tell people like.

Yeah, but go brag about that thing. How a week, go brag about it.

Let me show you, Let me show you what that thing do. But now I don't care about that because if if you going around saying my coochie bag, it's because you didn't give.

Me what it is. Yes, it's because you didn't do what you needed to do, right right, that's getting here.

In my younger years, I used to going to love and beyond my means.

But you know, I was a waitress at TGI Friday. What does that mean? Let me tell you, you got to give good service.

Okay, they take two cents to they struck the lemonade.

I'm back with a ref Yeah. You know what I'm saying. Okay, they potato.

Skins could be warm, but they're not hot.

Yeah.

Instead of going take the ones away and just giving you four more, I'm giving you a whole new batch.

You know what I'm saying.

That's great, though, but I feel like that speaks volumes about you know, you as a person, because that's it's just so funny to me when you tell me these stuff, because I just think about how how we were in the same settings and how.

It was just so different.

When I used to wait trees, I used to be checking on people every thirty minis, oh.

Right up, facts, because I hated that job.

I had one real waitressing job, like working at like a restaurant and bar wire. I used to actually have to serve food, you know, Foxing Hounding.

Yes, I remember when you worked there.

Me and my best friend Jazzmine, we had just got like some little temp jobs in the summer, like temporary little jobs working as waitresses at these popping sports bar in Houston, and I just hated it old fucking much. Yes, I used to be in a bag eating fries on my phone, just babing, come check on people every thirty mens, And I feel like.

You know, it was the same thing. Get me, well, I was not trying.

To be I was not trying to go I was not trying to go above and be on because even not to be funny, but even when I was younger, I will say these like I felt like when I.

Was younger, I was like I just know my coochie good.

I could just stay, I could just lay here like I don't have to do nothing because I know it's good, and I'm not gonna do the most unless you make me feel.

Like I gotta do them all right right.

I feel like, like I said, it was just me just doing the moment. Yeah, And then, like I said, I would make excuses, but I would not one thing. I was good at my younger years. I would cut them off. Yeah, I wasn't like always let me go back and let me try to.

No, we not.

I'm gonna get out of it. I'm gonna I'm gonna do the most and I'm performing because I know I did my.

Part, and then I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna lie.

But you know what, I do kind of regret that because I feel like there's men still to this day that be talking to people and be like, oh, yeah, I used to talk to her.

I was nineteen. I'm forty six.

I'm weak because I know somebody that you was talking about. It's one person that came to mind when you said it. Oh, we always talk about him. One person that be still telling people that he used to fuck with you.

I don't know who it is, but maybe they burning heir.

Who Oh my god, and he won't stop.

Yeah, bro, especially when them clips went viral recently.

Oh for real, Yes, how.

Do you know?

Because they told me somebody said so.

He said yes, and it was around a girl that he didn't even know that I knew.

He was like, Oh, that's my old bitch. You go to school. Oh my god.

Now it really be disgusting, though serious, when you really see like and think about some of the people that she used to date, like people that.

Dudes that I dated when I was like.

Eighteen and twenty and twenty three, I just be like, what my god, I am repulsed.

And that's why we always tell the younger girls that are like least the lengthy that are going through a breakup. I promise you, if you're watching this show and you're between the ages of eighteen to twenty eight, your type is going to change. By the time you hit thirty one, thirty two, thirty three, your type is going to change.

That heartbreak. You are literally going to laugh and you gonna look back at them niggas and be like, y'all are some loser.

Oh why was I there? I was not saying about one. And don't get me wrong, not everyone, because I have some guys that I used to Yeah, I have some guys that I used to date. They they cool and they doing great things.

But like.

I just be like, what the fuck was I thinking? And what the fuck was I doing?

That one? I wasn't even thinking about him.

That's who I always think about because I know he be still doing it. She he lame, all right, let's meet me acting like a hy n He looked.

Like one too. I don't know about why is being skinny and teddy? Oh I told you mean he's still young. I was just saying.

I just say all that he's as.

That's how I know I'm blessed God, don't play everybody who did me wrong?

What's slim said? Color purple curse. I feel like that's why I still look good too.

Everybody who did me wrong. I sucked up all, sucked it up, fucked that youth out. And that's why I say I love being a good woman.

I love being a good woman and the woman who can walk away. It's always gonna be me moving on okay them other week.

Of course, I'm sorry, y'all. I was trying to sit my little drink. You drink you would think it, I know, you would think it's a liquid. Well, this is the thing for me. I feel like all I do is drink water. Like with me doing my challenge, all I'm all I drink every single day is water. And like myself, I'll do a protein smoothie, but I really.

As like a meal though.

Yeah, like I'll do a protein smoothie, but outside of the smoothie, all I drink is water. So I think when I come here and then's hobby making me these drinks. You know, it's just be delightful for my palette. You got a little something Nelson it too, and it does and it does have the CBB or thhc uh a little liquid in there.

So I think I'll be trying to come to my stoothie.

I think you're right. Plus bowl, it's all right, that's all right. But yeah, so of course muse Beauty Collection dot com. Make sure you get your lip glosses, lipliners, mac liquid lipsticks, jelly blushies. I also have on the Mascarrett an eyeliner that's gonna be dropping really really soon. And yeah, make sure y'all shop MUSBD Collection dot com. My lipcombo today is the Glaze lip gloss and the chest nutlip liner.

They see, oh okay, it looks good. I didn't do nothing to crazy.

Yeah, I have on chestnut lust and glaze.

It's my go to period.

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Y'all is your girl xp Andy Schagirl Jury in the call, and as y'all know, summer is around the corner, so I know y'all are trying to get y'all's weight loss goals met. And we're gonna tell y'all about four herst dot com and how they can help you.

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LF y'all ash your Girl XP and is sugarl dry hole. Y'all know we have.

A segment on Poor Minds called Item of the Week. But do you have a product or something that you want to promote and you want it featured on Poor Minds.

Your opportunity is here period.

If you have an item or you have a business and you want to get it promoted, we are now having slots available on the Poor Minds episode. So if you would like to get your product featured for Item of the Week, all you need to do is send it email to Item of the Week p M at gmail dot com. That's I T E M O F T H E W e E K p M at gmail dot com. Send us an email and we'll work it out.

We're gonna figure it out.

Get your product get your business sponsored, and yeah, make you some money. We love to more a small business now and a black business said that, but I mean.

Diminade. Any businesses welcome. So now it's time.

To get into the about about.

To please over there? What was that dance called the shoulder? What is this rock with it?

That's what I was over there and my white gh.

Look at way back. My bop of the week is Lucky. But I'm just playing my bop of the week this week. I'm not gonna lie.

I was very skeptical about this artist when she first came out, because I was like, mm, Now I'm still a little skeptical because I'm like, is she kind of like biting off of Sizza and biting off of the you know.

The community. But I'm not gonna lie.

She dropped another song and it's actually for her so sailor do y'all remember she had that song I Hope You're happy?

Got you a menie me? Bet you mean yes?

But she has another song called cut up Okay, and it's so good.

It is so good I.

Am the The jury is still out on her, Like I said, I want to see if she's in it to win it, because a lot of times we see these artists, they come out, they sound like another artist, and they don't last too long. But I will say, for me, this is really the second song by her that I've jammed and I've listened to.

She's two for two of me. I'm not mad, so cut up by Sailor. That's my bop. Go ahead.

My bop this week is Pushed to Start by Tyler. By Tyler, So, I've already really really liked that song ever since he came out. But she just came out with a remix feature in Sean Shanda Paul and shout out to Sean Paul as a sun falling Okay, exp is Sean Paul and Tyler. This song Seana and Tyler. So that is my vibe. I love this song, y'all. Y'all should check it out if y'all haven't heard it. I feel like Tyala has done a really good job.

She's a start, she is. I agree. I think she just needs a little word. May be saying she the next.

Riana, Hold your horses that but too early, hold your that's fair, it's too early.

But I do think she's very talented, and I do think she's a start.

So now you know they used to do that with Arianna Grande and Mariah Darry you know what I'm saying.

So I ain't mad at that comparison though, but I will say Tyler is a star. I think she needs to work a little bit on her public speaking because sometimes she I think she gets nervous in situations when people ask her something crazy. I mean, she still she doesn't know how to respond, like Meghan. There was a recent incident where the lady on the Oscar carpet was like, I listened.

To Meghan the Stallions music, and it makes me want to fight.

What song of Megan's makes you want to fight? You know?

They always look at black women like we just going around punching.

People in the face.

So everybody has been on her ass about it, but Meghan just carried it with such great She was like, no girl, bad, YadA yadi. It makes you feel cute, it makes you feel beautiful. Now, if she would have said Mona Leo, Mona Leo will make you smack a beach, she do. Now.

If it would have been.

Car Yeah, if it would have been a Mona Leo, I would have said, you know what, yeah, Mona Leo music do make you want to fight a little bit, But Meghan, Meghan is not a fighter. Turn up, get cute you a baddie.

I got good.

Kouchie music, so I think Megan is good at handling awkward situations on the carpet.

So I want Tyler to get there. But Tala is a star body tea.

She can wear high fashion, cute girl, he can sing. Yes, she has all the factors. So that's a good it is, that's a good bob shunned up all, come sing with them on the list.

Y'all is never settled.

And if you're an avid listener of poor minds, then you probably have heard me say these numerous times. Like I say these all the time, I've always felt this way. Don't ever settle for anything in life if it's not exactly what you want. Don't let people tell you that you cannot get what you want out of these life because it's absolutely possible.

I had so many people when I was in my twenties.

Telling me that the things that I wanted was unreleased, unreasonable. And if I have listened to those people, I wouldn't be where I am today. It's not for anybody else to understand that as long as you know what it is and you willing to put work in to get the things that you want, you don't have to settle, and don't let people convince you that you have to settle.

Up?

Now, boo, you can't do it. I could do whatever I want to do, Okay, and I will so yeah, don't ever.

Ever, since I was a little girl, I've loved being on camera, entertaining myself and everybody around me by sharing my thoughts and opinions on anything pop culture. For the past few years, I've heard your requests.

But now it's finally time to deliver.

Okay, y'all, let's get into the teeth with love lexp.

Girl Anyways.

Okay, now it's time to get into our favorite segment of the show. Y'all know, if y'all have any questions, any testimony, you'll send them to ask poor Minds at gmail dot com. That's ask poure in my nbs at gmail dot com. Okay, I got a question of too, so oh, I.

Gotta start sorry, all right. I dated this guy I met at work for four months. He understood me and loved things about me that I never imagined a guy would be so attentive to. I admired him a lot too. From the beginning. He was honest that he was a few months out of a long relationship with his kid's mother and that he wasn't in.

A place to date seriously. But he really liked me.

It got to a point to where he felt it was irresponsible to keep going because our feelings were progressing and he didn't want to hurt me more. Later on, we stopped talking, and when I see him around, he does not speak to me. I know it's not personal personal, he just doesn't want to drag this along. We can't talk casually without wanting more. We had a special connection and I never felt like this.

Before, and that Dick was so fire. How can I move on?

I feel heartbroken even though it was a short amount of time.

I feel like this should make it even easier to move on because it was a short amount of time.

And then she said he don't speak to her when she sees him.

Girl, move on, because I feel like the least somebody could do is speak to you. I agree, like, so this is what I don't say, and he just act like you don't exist. I feel like he doesn't care, Like the feelings for you are still there, but the feelings for him are not there. And that would be enough for me to just be like, good readings, I'm done with you because you you not worried about me.

Not worried about because also, I will say this, men will say men are hot and cold, right, so they'll be.

Like, oh, I love you, you mean so much to me.

We have feelings. And then they'll be like, hey, I don't want to hurt you. I'm not the man for you. We need to separate.

But guess what.

Don't listen to nothing, they say, Listen to their actions.

Are his actions matching.

That he loves you and that he feels you and that he wants to be with you? Are his actions matching that he don't want to be with you, He's not ready for a relationship. He told you what it was, and not only that, his actions are matching what's on this side. So pay attention to the action. Do not listen to words when it comes to men. I'm telling

Not to be, and well, if we being completely honest, I don't even think that applies any situation because it ain't no words.

He's not saying nothing to you. He not even saying high worse.

That's what I'm saying. The actions match, but I was saying the words because of what he told her prior. Oh, our feelings are progressing too much.

I can't do this. I can't listen to that. A'm paying attention to that.

But the thing is his actions is following that, right, It's not like he giving you mixed signals. Like he said, he feels like it's progressing too quickly, and now he acting like you don't exist. I think that you should just move on. It would be different if he said that and then when he see you, y'all are still gazing yeah eyes or he's giving you any type of hope that you know it could be something, but he not giving you no hope.

He giving you nothing. And I always say, do a thirty day. De talks thirty days.

Don't look at his social media, don't look at his stories, don't call him, don't text him, completely no contact for thirty days. You will literally not know the exis this anymore fiercely? So do a full detox chap all right, Drea?

Question number two?

Okay, question number two, Hey, Drea and Lex, I love y'all so much and hope y'all see this. I'm twenty one and I've been with my boyfriend for six years. We're high school sweethearts and he's my first for everything over the years. I've naturally gained some weight since high school, but he constantly brings it up in a negative way during arguments. He makes comments that make me feel insecure and it hurts because I've never made him feel bad about his appearance.

Lately, he's been mean.

Starts fights out of nowhere, and acts like he doesn't care about my feelings.

I do everything for him, but he never acknowledges it.

I don't nag or hold things in, I communicate, but he still makes me feel unappreciated. I know he's not cheating, I've checked, but sometimes I wonder if he wants to step out and see what's out there. He wasn't always like this, but after high school he changed. Honestly, I'm tired of getting I'm tired of feeling disrespected and unvalued.

Should I leave or keep trying? Please help God, don't bless no mess. I feel like you should leave. You should leave.

You're too young. And one thing about it, I feel like, like I always say, I am a strong believer, believer in the let them theory.

You gotta let people do them. So sometimes you have to walk away from.

A situation and you'll see what a person really wants. If you walk away from a person, man or a woman, and they fight for you, they're doing the effort, they're getting the they're changing, they're really showing up for you. That's a person that really wants to.

Be with you.

But if you walk away from somebody and they just they're okay with it, they're okay with your absence, that ain't the person for you. I truly believe that one day all the good men and all the good women will find each other and just be together.

You know how old the earth is. Come on now, I don't know if this okay. Come on now. We gotta keep it positive. But we've been here for a while.

And but I will say that it's okay to walk away from things that no longer serve you.

And if you're what are.

Sometimes we have to ask ourselves, like what are what am I walking away from? You're walking away from somebody who makes you feel unattractive, who makes you feel unloved?

Walk away because you know what.

I was in a relationship before a while, a long time ago, and I was gaining a weight, and we started going to the gym together. That's what a real man gonna do. Hey, baby, let's go work out together. You know, we both gained a little way. I always say, it's not about what you say, it's how you say it. So I think that this is a young man who probably does want to be outside because if y'all, y'all

Girl, that man gotta grow and so do you. Yeah, Sez, I feel like you should just let he go.

Y'all are young, you gonna find somebody else, And I feel like that's unhealthy, Like no matter what age.

Yeah, y'all are young.

But I feel like if he always peeking at you and saying niggaive stuff about your appearance, that's not something that I see changing, you know, I feel like it's just gonna get worse and progress as y'all get older, because that's not the way to motivate somebody to want to lose weight. If he wants you to lose weight, or if he feel like, oh, you don't put on a few pounds, like Lick said, maybe go Maybe y'all should go to the gym together. Maybe he should offer

If that's something that he's good at and you're not.

I feel like picking at somebody and talking shit about they appearance is not the way to motivate them to do anything. And if he doing it now is twenty one, he gonna keep doing it as y'all relationship continues to go on, because that's just a negative characteristic that a person has. Yeah, I think you young. I'm sure you're beautiful. You have a lot ahead of you in life, because twenty one is so young, so young, So yeah, he

So yeah, I agree with one thousand percent.

All right now, So make sure y'all tune in every Friday, poor minds. We got music, beautycollection dot com, get all your lipsticks, all that good stuff. Make sure y'all tune in to every episode of lovelexp ten am on Monday mornings. We don't miss a Monday. All the hot tea you need. We are reviewing Real Housewives of Atlanta right now, y'all. Every week Real Housewives of Atlanta, hot topics, the good stuff. So shout out to all my love birds on lovelexp and and.

Make sure y'all follow my YouTube channel, Dre and a Cold with three e's. I drop blogs every week.

To drop the new blog a few days ago, and yeah, they drop every week. It's blogs, beauty content. I kind of try to switch it up. It's not blogs every single week, but it's something every week. I'm dropping something, So make sure y'all tune in.

Thank y'all, Bye, y'all.

Make sure y'all share the content, like subscribe, follow all that good stuff. And let me say this before we close off, y'all. There is one Twitter account that is connected to poor Minds. It's p oh, you are underscore in my nds. Y'all are tagging the wrong poor Minds page. If you see at poor Minds with no underscore that is at fake page, do not follow that page.

Okay they block.

Me Andrea and the poor Minds page on both so we only have one Instagram, one Twitter, one TikTok.

It is p O you are underscore in my nds. I and we got a hell a fake Facebook page on.

The Facebook page our face.

The crazy thing is our Facebook page actually have the least amount of follow.

So if you want to face, the one that's hours got the least amount.

Of but one that's not us got like two hundred and fifty.

Make if you actually look at the content, because the caption is like, whoever it is, don't speak English, because their catches are like bumba clade?

Should men? Should men pay bill? Should men pay bill? Yes?

No?

Check answer below block block, Like that's literally what the caption.

I'm like you what that DG is bumba claude, bumba claude. I was forced into this, but we're gonna make it work.

Dance tonight. I wonna chust tonight. I spend my money tonight. I spend my money tonight, my money, yeah tonight. I want to toast tonight, my money tonight.

I wanted it freak tonight.

Baby, Yeah, we need to do It's fine, brand new, it's for you. Make sure that you look good, make sure that I smell good. Let's purchase to New Bentley. I know that, so glad it's not that windy. Here comes there girl named Donnie.

As if she wants to go.

Tonight's gonna we havet fuzz show, big dancing on the floor, folk shripping, I don't know, money feeding everywhere, Champagne, we won't go there, Bottles popping in the yeah, the screaming.

I don't can dance tonight. I want to so tonight.

I'll spend my.

Money tonight, my money, money tonight, spend my.

Money, yes tonight. I wanna tonight free tonight, baby yeah, I kind of eight man shout out to Lucy power. This weekends so long.

This I was.

A couple of fresh Yeah. I don't need to settle down. My body don't know how right there. I see you looking sure, hope that you're not took in. Don't get lost in the crowd. This place is.

So damn wild. Go ahead and fly show ice, go ahead to what you like. I'm feeling just as flies. Oh you hear your sons, and I.

Wonna dance tonight. I wonna toast tonight. I'll spend my money tonight. I spend my money tonight.

I spend my bonny, Yeah.

Tonight, I wanna toast tonight, tonight money tonight, freaky tonight.

Freaking you was already, but my money said my money, yeah man, What thing about us? Y'all eating karaoke? Motherfucking here ah y'all