Hi, I'm Kate Berlan, I'm Jacqueline Novak.
And this is poog, an ongoing conversation about wellness between two obsessive friends.
Two untamable intellects. This is our hobby, This is our hell.
This is our naked desire for free products. This is poog. Today's topics looselie.
Speaking waffles, Julianne me tap, you even got a fast come? Oh my god, double poog merch. I know, I look at this, he's in view actually, and I've got mine. Don't doubt my water?
Incredible? Don't you dare doubt my water? My dad last night he said, what's poog? He looked at my water bottle? And then I gave him the explanation and what'd you say? I know I had to give the full rundown. Well. By the way, also, is this like a perfect segue to go into the personal that my dad has Alzheimer's? Just dropping it up top here's what's fascinating.
Yeah.
I was thinking like will I ever bring this up on poog? Or will I bring it up today? And then and I was like, this is it. It's like it's fascinating, right, because why would I conceal that I know, right, or I think it's like because of myself. I'm like, well, in my comedy and my stand up, I don't talk about my life. Really, I mean, it's all my life, but I don't talk about myself. It's like we have to preserve the private, and I have to preserve the private.
Some things have to be sacred. Like but I'm I'm coming out well also because well also, well that was a perfect segue because like, well, why would my dad not know what poog is? And it's like because he has all times?
Yeahs, but I love this as a promotional moment for pug mer.
Yeah, to integrate the personal trauma.
But I'm actually I mean, I'm I'm making a joke to be clear. Actually wait, I'm making a joke because I actually do think it's it's it's a quality.
Uh Like I.
Really like the idea of actual like trauma being really right in there with the merch. Yeah.
Yeah, so support and support.
I briefly was like, oh oh wait, it's I sound like one of those people. I sound like I'm saying the opposite what I'm saying, which is like and this is good TMI. I will trying to have a light podcast. Obviously that's not who I am. No, No, I was being dead serious. My zilllessness is often mistake.
It was a perfect It was a perfect end because I was like, I was like, oh, logging onto poog and I've had to cancel Poog or I had to cancel yesterday because I was going through too much of my parents and I was like, also interesting, like why because by the way, Alzheimer's on the rise. And also I'm like this is so I don't know, it's been incredibly isolating for me, and I'm actually finally reaching the point where I'm like, oh, I actually have to like
ask for help. That's for help. Yeah, also only child whatever, And it is amazing because I sort of just in this last few days for the first time, have been asking for help and it's like, oh, right, people actually want to offer help, who can or even and also people it's like there's nothing you can do, Like there is nothing you can do, Like it's a hideous disease and there's nothing you can fucking do, Like the medications
aren't like there's just truly nothing you can do. But it is the thing of like what you can do is like check it on people. So I am saying just for for everyone who's dealing with alzheimer, it's fucking hell. And if you know someone who's going through it, it's fucking hell. And like my mom's his ownly caregiver and it's I mean, that has to change now. It's what I'm dealing with because it's just it's impossible. But like, yeah, yeah, people who caregivers all of it, it's just so insane.
It's so unfathomable. And also just how there's no programs, like there's no community program. It's just it's just it's crazy. Obviously I should say there's nothing I'm learning in the last again two days. Yeah, I'm like doing like, oh, like the Alzheimer's Whenever fucking website, Like god bless, people are doing work around it. But yeah, but but then you here's what's really funny.
Though, a public statement on this is a public statement on the quality, like you're talking about your personal experience. Yeah, but I'm also laughing feeling like wait, there's nothing go on.
Another thing, because I've had such a like a hard couple days and it's good, you know, I haven't had a good breakdown about it in a while and I needed to Yeah, but like just now again. Had to cancel poog yesterday today, had to move it a little bit because I was on all these crazy calls and then the cord that I used to plug in my MIC didn't work, and I felt like usually that would send me into a micro spiral. I'd be like, my
life fucking sucks. I'm gonna kill myself, like I've grown literally, I go, I go, and because I'm dealing with the Alzheimer's now, I was like, yeah, I was like, don't sweat the smile stuff, you know. I was like doing the thing where I was like, yeah, this is actually not a problem. And then I go, look at me joining poog with joy in my heart. I was like, the cord will not the cord is not the problem, and nothing, you know, none of it's a problem. Really,
It's just an experience, just a horrible experience. But you know, but I'm also today able to go. Last yesterday I was driving to my parents' house, extreme darkness right, feeling like oh the walls were closing in, and then left like ten thirty pm feeling better, and then today I'm now, huh, I lost it.
Feeling better I was I gonna say, yeah, oh you lost the mood.
I mean you lost now it was shocking like today, like it will be. It'll it'll plunge me into despair again, like inevitably, but it's it's funny or not funny. It's just like oh right, and then some days it feels manageable, or some days it feels like, oh it's okay, it's not you know, he's still alive and whatever. But it's like, yeah, anyone who's dealing with it, I guess just I love you keep going Holy shit.
Isn't it amazing the way like when you have an experience and you're like, oh, this is what everyone's talking about whatever the thing is like it literally can be like an illness, you know, like and you're like, I get it now or whatever, like I.
Don't know that this is weird, like.
Or maybe I'm just talking about our inability to make real other people's experiences that we don't totally when we're not experiencing them and understand exactly.
It's a wait, like we literally have to wait for everyone, Like everyone in America has to have an immediate loved one be shot in the head of a mass shooting for anyone to really give a shit, yeah, or something like it's so you can like feel empathy. But but but as you're saying, sometimes it's like, oh, like I was always yeah, these things that are horrible at a distance, it's like understandably, you just can't really reach you can't reach it.
The the a lot of thoughts. By the way, I am on a low dose vatter all today. Holy sh interesting, see what that does?
I pounded a magic mind.
I just skipped the chapter on meds. Oh I forgot to take my magic mind. I have been taking it. So this is the problem. I always introduced nine new behaviors at once when I'm like determined to get my shit together today, I know I can't tell what a fuck it is. So if it's working, then I guess I'll have to keep the nine new things.
The magic mind.
Well, there's a lot of products I want to talk about, but but let's okay, Well we're just gonna stay on this room. It like, what is the desire in this particular case? What is that feeling of Am I really bringing this to poog?
Right? I mean, it's just because it's interesting because I have like it's not like I've been holding back, but I guess I have or something because but so I guess the first thing is some weird fear that it seems like I'm like I want attention, which is so funny. I have a podcast where I coughing. It's like can you believe it? Yeah, It's like yeah, like yeah, Like I guess there's a fear that somehow I'm like, is this people.
Are going to reach oative like like reach out, please reach out, this is my plea.
I know that's like the joke. No no, no, that's give me. It's like no, no, but I'm just saying, yeah, so what is It's interesting because I was thinking about it again as I was like running to Poog today, I was like, this is funny, like this is and also people who are listening to this know someone what the hell seiners like that's just the truth.
And it drop a if you drop an ailment on Poog, I mean you're like or like you know, like it's some specific thing anything. I think they're they're out there and they're experiencing ship. It's almost it's almost got to be shocking to be listening and and uh, you know, like like when someone was like when I first mentioned that, I was watching f one and they were like, it's not an.
Ailment, but you know, it's like me too.
It's like a holy shit, it's like you know what I mean, Like there's just something because poog is a microscopic sliver of our lives, if you know, obviously right, like, and yet it can.
Contain it all. You know, it's like everything.
Yeah, it's it's It's like, but I'm interested because what is it about when information and shared? I know why that changes it?
I know it changes it. Yeah, and I guess I'm like, what am I protecting? Like my my Okay, you could say I'm protecting my parents' privacy or something or like, but like what like what is that? What even is that?
Like?
Or like the dignity like like oh like my father's dignity, right, And it's like well because also it's like hard, well it's all hard, but like my dad doesn't know he has it because he fucking forgets right, which by the way, is actually I think for the best because my dad has always been a hyper anxious person and so it's like if he was waking up every day and someone's going hey, by the way if you're if you're wondering what's going on, this is it? But like that would
be really stressful. And he's still very there. He's still very funny, Like he's still like like even last night, I just think of me being there while my mom went out, and he's like, I don't like this, like, well I can't be alone, like what's gonna happen? And I was like, Dad, like, I you know, you're eighty too like to tell you this, like something that happened. He's like like what I was, like, you could fall?
And then he does this big thing of miming biting his nails like oh no ah, you know, and he's like if I fell, like get up amazing, you know. And it's like and then he's like, well, I'm glad you're here. What if I fell, you know, when my mom was gone, It's like and so yeah, it's also it's the not sharing. It is also part of the thing that's so horrible about Alzheimer's is that it's like you're grieving the person as are still alive or something.
And so there's I think part of me that's I haven't been in denial, but there's part of me like anything that's hard, it's the fear that if you look at it too directly you'll be annihilated, and actually annihilation And what I'm learning truly just this week is this thing of like, oh, actually looking at it directly, like that is where the medicine is, or it's like to bring in young you know, young reality is medicinal. It's like, oh, actually facing it is, that is what you need to do.
And then I ended up leaving like oh it somehow felt like oh this isn't It's still the worst thing that's ever happened to me and my mom for sure, but it's also like all right, like yeah, you know today I'm all then about it. I'm like seeing I'm like this is an opportunity to feel my strength and to show love and like it is. But also it's
just like it's so much. I was talking to a friend who's dealing with it, and like she was just like it's so much invisible work, and like it's like, oh, true, it's just like these like invisible like invisible work, invisible like pain or like triumph for anything. It's just like very and yet aging. God. I mean, it's just no the yeah, I was thinking about out there aging, the inevitable decay and the fear of it.
I was I was lying, lying awake, and I was thinking about that thing. Your friend said like once like it's just a life.
Oh my god, totally. Or he was talking and it was like, so I die, like it's just my life, It's just one life, so Zen.
It's it's because I used to think that the way that we like you, you know, to get through your day, right, you can't constantly be thinking like whatever, just you can't be aware of your mortality in a visceral way right constantly. Yeah, I mean, or I guess you can. I don't know
what I'm saying. I get I get more. I guess what I mean is like, like I remember as a child sort of this pure understanding of death at a certain point that was just like, you know, completely obliterating and like like literally have to find a way too.
You know. It's like I used to be like, if I'm not contemplating death all the time, I'm like living in an illusion, and like I must contemplate all the time and be reminded, reminded, reminded, you know, in order to make the most of the day, right, like this this kind of idea, right, and that are like not understanding or being constantly or like all the avoidance of
our own mortality, right, the denial of death whoever? That was right, like yeah, but also like fuck it kind of you got to deny it, like just freaking like for me, like part of a path out of depression was like to lose myself in the like in the bullshit kind of and and like you know, not not have these massive meaning crises all the time basically like to care about bull like care about some bullshit.
Like like you know, sublimate there's like or there's no, I don't know. I'm not smart anymore.
I can never I can never used to be sorry, I'm not following through on the like the sentences in full. Oh god, you know what you're ready for this. It's sort of like what I was saying the other day about Okay, I was having a moment of wait, what the fuck? Why was I off adderall for nine years? I forgot I have to be on adderall. It's the only thing. And I was like, oh god, oh god,
I lost years. I lost years, right, I said it to your I was like I was like years lost to forgetting that adderall is good for and then and then I was like, no, fuck it, your's life fallow.
Let them lie fallow.
Like as I said two weeks ago, uh, you know, like sort of careening through a life whatever, the unexamined life. I mean, I'm listening, you know what I mean.
To not examine by the way people people are not examining. I mean that is just so true. People are not examining, and and then people are over examining, right, I mean it's like, yeah, that's the that's the I hate this and.
I'm sure I brought it up before, but like a therapist once was like, you know, when it comes down to it, therapy like like some people need the screw tight and some people need it loosen.
Yeah, I love that. Damn it's good. That was like the.
Entirety of although I immediately go like I need some parts tightened and some parton listen, so it falls apart instantly. I went to a doctor, just got a new insurance and just found a doctor nearby. Just the internest well, a couple of things. One I don't know, but annuals aren't what they used to be. No, I'm asking you this because I wasn't even putting a gown.
What do you mean they go take your tongue even undressed over your sweater?
Yeah no, Actually you just slid a hand at my back, unhooked a bra with one hand and felt around. He said, you don't have to change out it do a gown. He unbuttoned my my top button unzipped.
Okay, just talking what.
I just think it'd be really funny if that's how we got to my abdomen, like like just everything was done like casual. Yeah, okay, so I'm like waiting for the gown.
No gown.
I was like all right, and then Kate, I waited for like forty minutes in the office. Oh so they already got me with the blood pressure and I was getting so I was having anxiety sort of. I think about just I don't know, I haven't been had a physical in a while, and just getting it started again.
And go in with a foam core blow up like your Netflix special. Then they if you were me, do you think that would help? Yeah, that's what's so fucked up. My mom. I've talked about this something. I'm sure my mom when I was like thirteen, you always put on something nice for the doctor. Her telling me, you always dressed up for the doctor. I know this is this is like early poog. I'm sure I brought it up because it's one of the most foundational stories of my life.
My mother telling me you should dress up for the doctor. You should look nice. I'll give you better care. It's the fucking truth. It's fucked up. It just bobs up.
You should go into your doctor, starting with the waiting room, like like you're.
You should go to your doctors like you come in and they think, like, who's that? What? Who's that? We better really check her out, you better really see if she's got anything bad going on. Holy shit, I want a girl like that to get sick. I mean, yeah, it's it's totally fun. Dress up for the doctor. Honey, you're a girl going into a man doctor. You better have a push up bra on. You better have Charlotte Tilbury pillow fucking talk lips on. Yeah something hurts, Yeah,
oh yeah, scary. Okay, anyway, so what do you do. I guess the un button's your top, so slap.
I'm waiting for forty minutes and I'm like, and then he comes in and I feel like he's looking at me to like see if like, and I started to be like, I like, I don't know what.
I would love to see you in there. Hey, so it's been a while.
Yeah, And then he comes in and I immediately try to churn make it very clear that I'm not remotely angry at him, because I don't.
Think that's going to do anything good. Angry about the weight, yeah, yeah, And he's like pushing right, He's like barkrt.
He's like comically pushing a bar heart with like a computer on it, and yeah, and I'm just like and I'm looking around the office, going and I nurse do that And it looks like the offices I like grew up in, Like they're just like normal, right, but like you look and I was almost like is it clean and here? Like you know, like it was like like the sort of just looking around and going, yeah, I am a child of Instagram, and I I will pay for a doctor, like for yeah.
If there was a succulent I and one of those like white rope tapestry things on the wall, just suddenly you'd feel safe.
The woven, the woven, actually, the woven, the woven, I think would be a little too not quite medical enough for me.
Yeah yeah, totally, but it suck. But a mother's in law, mother in law's tongue whatever.
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah.
It's like it's either called it's like snake plant or other in lost tongue. Yeah.
Yeah. So and he comes, I'm like all right, and I was like I was like texting like like Chris is like waiting outside. I was like, am I I started to do write like am I my rights to leave? Like I don't know, Like I thought it could be like a moment in my life where I'm like I won't stand for.
Like being made to wait. It's not being made to.
Wait because I I, oh, I'm googling how long to wait for a doctor?
You know what I'm saying, you know.
And it's like it was really becoming about like I want to go, like go home and check out my options again, like I don't know about this place?
Yeah yeah, totally. Oh my god, you know, I.
Don't know, like not because of the weight that's standard and if the place were gorgeous, I'm sure i'd be like.
Was there done?
You know?
It was this stuff piled up? What No, It's just like it was normal.
I just worn it was like a doctor's office and in nineteen eighties, you know, like and just like you know, so he comes in and I'm waiting for the gown. You know, it's the questions. He listens to the heart, he listens to the lungs, He presses on the abdomen.
Jesus, anything on the abdomen.
And he checks my legs like by just like the bottom, pulling up the bottom of the pant leg for swelling, like because like some women have swelling.
Down there or something.
Okay, he's checking for full on a demon whatever. And that's it. Not a tap on the knee.
Not as the eyes.
The only thing that happened was stethoscope to the chest, to the lungs, press on the stomach, and then check the legs for swelling in my button up. Well, I had forgotten. It was like afternoon and I'd eaten you know,
I ate an air once smoothie in the morning. Yeah, but so I got to slip for the lab I have to go back, and I was just like, you know again Instagram, I was like and I said to him, I was like, like, because there's so many things that are that are like the home testing of the blood or whatever, and it's like and the and the shit and the whole thing, and so I just like doubt a regular doctor's office now, Like I'm like, what do you even test for?
What's even covered?
I was like, I mean you test for everything, right, like like do the full panel, you know, like yeah, whatever, thyroid, vitamin D.
He's like, and vitamin D is not covered.
Everyone's vitamin division like just supplement, I mean vitamin D division for whatever. Yeah, he was fine, but can you believe or is that said? I was like, maybe the knees happening and all that stuff. I remember thinking of it just for children, like it's just developmental.
I feel like my tap. I feel like mine got tapped the last couple of years. I'm not sure, but I could be wrong.
Like to not have to end us for an annual just's what.
Guess what I think. I didn't undress for my last one. You undress when you're going in for like gynecological, when they're doing like an exam, right, and they're like giving you a breast exam or something, but just for I think, actually, I think you might be okay. I don't like that, he didn't do flashlight in the eyes, but I think.
You're nor in the ear. I love that feeling. Actually, remember that thing that goes in the ear?
Oh yeah, total delegate seashell and.
You're like, oh god, yeah, yeah, what's he gonna see in there? There are these like cameras now that like you can order off Amazon, like you clean your ears, my friend.
Camera horrifying story of someone doing this, and like on a cran like what did the footage of the thing going in? It's horrible?
And then and then so anyways, like I don't know, I don't know what I want and a doctor and then and then I was asked for referrals for like get a dirm, get it whatever, get it whatever, And I don't know, can't I just don't know.
To me, I've got the referrals.
All your doctors are not accepting new clients.
Only one. What's that? Oh? I have that? What is that? I know you never use it? It's the nearer. I just started again. It's the nearer for wrinkles. What is it? Everything baby reals collagen into the skin. Guess what.
Right now my face might not be moving much, but it is like a fiery needle going into the skin is.
Working over to your house. And you did that on my hand and.
I scoll laser all right, you screamed.
Oh, by the way, I'm doing my second round of you do it on top. I'm doing V beam live, not live, but laser V beam. The treatment I'm doing to recap that I'm doing on my face targets red spots. I have a couple of burst spots after one treatment. I gotta say they're going down. And it's supposed to also help just overall skin like texture or something. Yeah, I think it's working.
And was it was it localized or was it like all over the whole face she blastomy all over?
They localized right on the red spots. So those turn into bruises. Yes, So it is like for like maybe five days you look there's like it looks like you have some crazy bruises, but nothing they can't be covered with makeup. After day two, tiny bruises, the bruises right on the red It's not like he got knocked. No, it's like a little friend like you got popped. Yeah, he got popped. Yeah, I've never heard you use that kind of language. I loved it.
I know I loved it too. Well, they say guaranteed results in ninety days. I don't know what I'm going for, so I'm just doing it everywhere, you know what I mean.
And it hurts, which is exciting.
Oh but I'm I'm okay, I stopped it.
But anyway, I want here's here's the big thing.
I want the big one. They got a big one now with a bigger area.
Cover bigger spots.
Oh the pro I want it, okay, and I think this video of it should be mean we're getting scented.
I want it, yeah, totally.
I'll show it off on the pod totally.
Hey, I have a calp. I have a Kelp noodle question. Yeah, so I got you on. I'm ready to do I know I haven't done any I'm ready to soften them with baking soda, lemon juice. How much? Open up the package of CLP noodles. What I them? Toss some in and you let it sit there for a minute or something. Yeah, in water with lemon juice and baking soda or just oh yeah, okay.
And I I throw them in a bowl sink water, fill it up, yep, dump some baking soda, squeeze a lemon. I mean, I think on the package they I mean, they definitely don't say need to do that. They just say like warm water, hot water. But I do feel like something about it, like it did feel like it did something, you know what I did? And then I don't know if my soom arrived, my assumed.
Assumed tahini has rived. Thanks, guys, I'm going to be making that up.
So the question is how much goes in to a pile of noodles and do you sauce it and water? Do you thin it to get it to move?
It depends. Yeah, we'll I'll be doing probably something with the sum tahini, rice vinegar, sesame oil. Yeah, you do make up a combo? I already, Juliann some carrots and cucumbers. Can you believe that now, Julian like match sticks? Oh right, well you know what I did?
What So remember the like twenty dollars riceed cauliflower, riceed broccoli combo they have it?
Yeah, they were on for five hundred, yes accidentally. Yeah, I rised my own yesterday good in the blender.
Yeah yeah yeah, and then I I tamped it down inside of the carraway storage.
Mm hmm.
The glass top, the carraway whatever that is, ceramic glass top, the whole thing go from the microwave to the freezer or the oven. I mean it's it's gorgeous.
I feel like a god when I a very hard to get the top off. No, the vacuum seels so shocking. Have you not experienced this to get it off? Right? I'm like shaking. Yeah, sorry, I just had a flashback. I gifted my mother an entire Carraway. This is so her entire carra out of pocket gift set. Where are the templeware? This is all about me getting her off saran wrap? Sorry, this is a private where's the teperware? What do you mean? Like, like, where is it? She
hasn't been using it. It's very hard for in your home technologies. Yeah right, And I'm like it was para fifty dollar. Don't integrate big I'm the big daughter and the family doesn't integrate the gifted lifestyle change. Oh god, I got her. I got a Neutra bullet. She hasn't made one smoothie. I was like, we got to get you on stoothies protein in the morning. Yeah, she can't do it well. She last night. This was also amazing mother of a different generation. She like, she was like, oh,
I haven't eaten a thing. It was like three o'clock. She just like made herself a steak. I mean she's also, you know, a Spanish woman. She just like makes a little like strip steak, grills a side of a lemon, and then it's like, you know, she's leaving, and I'm like thinking about, oh, what am I gonna get dinner for myself and my dad. They live not far from an Airwan, so I was like, I'm gonna go to Airwon and get you know something. She was like, just make a steak. She was like, I have steaks. You
can make steaks. I go, I don't know how to do that, and of course I guess I kind of do. But it was like, do you.
Know actually that you can just throw a little butter in an oil for minutes?
She goes, She goes four minutes on each side. Yeah, that's it. She was leaving. That is incredible for brown, A little bit of brown, I mean delicious. But I didn't want it. I gave her a real talking to you because she it's so funny. Always I'm over there and it's like she looking at her groceries, right, and my dad's like obsessed with waffles. He's like hyper fixated, like hear my grummaging around like wait, looking forwards like waffles. Yeah,
like totally ten minutes later like waffles yeah. And then she's buying him like agg waffles. I go no, So I went to and I got like the seven dollars like fancy, you know, grain free fucking whatever. The waffles yeah whatever, yeah. And then she's got you know, General mills, like Raisin brand, and I went, mother, and I turn over. I go, the second ingredient is cane sugar. I go, we can't do this. I go hyper inflammatory and she,
you know, she's like all right. So then I arawon got her like the Ezekiel and like the the you know, the comparative brand, so we'll see. And then I also got I also opened the freezer and it's like God bless but just like Cherry Garcia shout out, but just you know, so I got some like coconut Bliss ice creams in there too. Yes, I'm just trying to get but you know you want the low inflamma shifts, yeah, the transfer.
So I am. I have been in a kind of like Poog, sort of Kate Poog, particularly like early days, like you know, like food and like whatever, but like Kate Pooh like what. Okay, So I've been like this last week. Okay, I've been let's see, I will I rise my own cauliflower.
What else? Okay?
I oh, I've gone down. I've gone down complete devotion to a new product. And I don't know perfect Amino. Okay, you were texting about this. I'm sold.
Okay, Okay, so this is exciting. I've already reached out. I want it. I've seen worn them. What'd you warn them? Okay?
I warned them that that I was going to be talking about it on this podcast.
Okay.
And I'm already pushing to do a collab. Okay, I've seen a flavor collab with them, pook huge.
I believe I've seen it in Air one, so we know it's quality. Yes, you have it has the Air one. There was a smoothie there, Okay, So there was a smoothie there. This month's you know, I think it was a monthly thing whatever. I don't know, but it was like Gary Breca. I know I missed out on the first smooth this perfect Yeah, and.
I was like, okay, who is that? Like whatever, and I like google him and like just like a immediately a like mugshot comes up, you know, like like whatever, like something like not a doctor claim he's a doctor, you know whatever.
Okay. I was like, I'm listening.
Something tells me I'm curious to try his protocols.
Okay, yeah, he didn't go through the institutions. He found his creative and academic pursuits among the people. Yeah.
So so I'm like whatever, so separately the perfect I'm curious, but the perfect a meno whatever.
And I'm usually I usually can't get horny, as.
You say for protein talk, like it just is like a b you know what I mean, Like I'm not like telling me about protein powders. But we all know, like my father is like crushing up peanuts, you know, like in a smoothie. Okay, And now he's way okay, and I'm like, so I I go down this perfect Amino path because I first saw it promoted via Tracy Anderson. Okay, like so stuck in my hand on, I gotta look at that, gotta lock up. Eventually, I go to the website.
In minutes, I'm so converted. It's not even funny. I download his ebook.
Trial to someone with their arms outstretched towards the sun. I was like, I don't know about this, yeah, book to get to you. I voted it to my dad. Okay.
I start telling loved ones to get on something within days. Actually sometimes before I've even received the product. If I'm convinced, I don't want them to be I don't want to, as I say, leave them to dust. I don't want to want it before day is ahead. On a supplement for the rest of our lives.
I'm like, get on now, or I'll always be what are the benefits of what are you feeling? Okay? And I want to also say, as we know, plas bow is real, but keep going.
Yeah, I mean, as I said, I'm doing ten things at once right now. I'm you know, so I've no clue if what is going from. Intellectually, I am sold.
Okay, this is a powder. This is a protein powder. Just to pull back, this is a brand of protein powder that you put in a smoothie.
It's not only off written powder form, and it's not in a big tub because you need a much smaller amount. Okay, So the entire premise is that protein. When you feed the body protein, it doesn't just turn protein into muscle. It breaks the protein down into a series of amino acids, okay, and then it uses those amino acids in a certain way. Those are the building blocks, okay. And then it builds new protein whatever in your body. So if you're building lean muscle, et cetera.
Okay, So where was I Look what I'm protein? They break it down when you eat protein. Oh yeah, good, Kate, you got a Kate. Can you believe it? It's the magic mind? Okay. So here's what he says.
If you get these proteins that only have some of the amino acids, right, or like one of the amino acids or disor whatever, it's discarded, okay, who discards it? A little fat and sure turn in turn in the glycogen fat storage.
Okay. Okay.
So he's like, I sent you this one thing. Okay, I say this one thing because I was like, this will get you. The thing about the cars.
Is worth it.
Hold on, I love how I text you your like hydrogenated water at air one that's twenty dollars a bottle of fourteen?
Oh no, I sent you the fourteen dollars one.
And then you're like the large jugs twenty You already heard about it, you already know.
Well, I look at those they have the water at Air one. This is a big jug of water that's cost twenty five dollars or twenty dollars and it's like hydrogen water or something.
Yeah, this is a new yeah water for wellness, nanopure restructured hyper oxygenated water. And yeah, you just I sent a picture normally fourteen it's right back the giant one it is for twenty five. Okay, well done, I gotta find it. This thing about the cars, it was like huge, all right, whatever doesn't an I guess let me guess what you're gonna tell me. Other protein isn't absorbed. It's malabsorbed.
It can't be used to build a car in your body or whatever. And then this perfect amino powder, it's perfect so it can make the protein work for you.
Right, well, okay, it's not just about a malabsorption though. To be clear, I just this isn't about liposomal viruin seeds.
You see what I'm saying.
But yes, you need the eight amino acids, and you need them all together at once for the body to do anything.
Okay, I got it, I got it, got it. Okay, I still am confused. It's a powder, but it's not an abjornt.
No, well, there's a powder form, but there's also tabs.
Oh, what are you doing?
Protein utilization? So a whole So here's the thing. Ninety nine percent utilization.
Is what is claimed.
Where a whole egg is the next highest thing you could eat that has all the amino acid dot every day, and that has fifty percent utilization.
Okay, okay, I get it.
Perfect amino has ninety nine Okay, I get it.
I get it. Okay, great, let's go send it in. This is a huge ad send it in. I mean, in fact, if they don't send it in, I'm actually boycotting. I'm gonna start doing false information. I'm gonna do false trials talking.
About Well, the thing is, they agreed to send it long before I promised to talk about it. Lovia, Okay, I'm just I'm in the honeymoon phase of a new product.
There is nothing better than that. There's nothing better than that high I guess what. I'm in honeymoon of shocking ASoP Oh again, not to be said ASoP. It looks like ASoP, I have a new product. Get this joccolin. This is a product.
Yeah.
Then I'm shocked by how good it is. So I literally got it as a little sample and they were like, this is great and if you're traveling, and I was about to go to New York. They go, I can't see it. Fuck it's called blue came mil Okay facial hydrating mask. And the woman was like, but you can also just use it as like a night cream, you know. I go, okay. Yeah, so I traveled to New York my sleep mask. Yeah, my lover and I wash our face. End of the night. We put this on and we
go to bed, dry, dry skin from traveling. Wake up. I'm sorry, am my eighteen years younger. This fucking shit. And then we did like four nights in a row and we were waking up, went only my god. Came Camemel and this is an ad I paid out of pocket. I go, I went in by we were in New York for like five days, A bunch of three different ESOPs to get so then you bought so listen to this. I got some more sample pockets. I go, I want the samples. I want the samples. And then I got
so I go, I'm buying it. I'm buying. I went into the store. I go, how much is it? I'll be honest, ouch, guess sixty. I'll just tell you. I couldn't wait.
Yeah, but like I thought, how many ounces?
I was prepared to go thirty five bucks. They hit me with sixty. I went, I'm not ready. I turned around on my heel. I leave the store. The next night. That night, I used this. I used the sample again, and I go, I'm buying this. Nothing is saying in the way in this product. I went and I bought it. It is unbelievable and they should sell more. And also the woman says, well, if you love this, and you'll really love the something something sublime, something, So I'd like
that to be sent to me, supreme rose something. This is just you ever heard the word us, kate, you ever heard us? But this is I'm telling you. I couldn't belie looking it up the hydration, and then I looked at the back. I go, what's fully in this? I'm like limonine linen oil. We're supposed to stay here from that. I don't let me due to the results. But goddamn key ingredients. Okay, right, right right, we chase the water. Nice good stuff. It's good stuff. And let me guess the.
Smell takes you away because they got essential oils and some oils.
I mean, like smells good. It smells very good. It smells very good. God damn, it's good. I'm trying to make make Lima the new cigarette in my house. You know, wait a second, you're using oh, snail musin the Lima over that great Lima by the way, for a bit of glide. Yeah, yeah, totally sure. You use the official Did you burn through the official Lima serum?
Is that? Why? Oh?
Ages ago, damn I still have mine.
Oh no, I think I still have the glide, but I burned through the serum and the cream.
I'd love a real Oh I've been saving that. I'm going to do that next. Yeah, the Doctor diamond I have my little list right now. I'm using the skin. I really want more Doctor diamond I. There is one skin here at the end of the episode. I've been begging for the one skin seerum and I even followed up on email. We're like kracking, okmo Celsius. Oh, she's back on the sauce, not that you ever left. Hmmm.
Tastes like peach horrible in a way I love sparkling blue raspberry. It's like, whoa my child?
Wait Jack, then this scares me. And that's a super even super can. It's not the usual thing, Celsius. That's just it's don't worry. It's just because I ran out of my small cans this morning when I finished you on adderall perfect Amino, supercharged Celsius, an hour of Tracy Anderson. But I wanted to talk about Celery Juice. Oh well, here we go. And God, don't forget God, baby, I never forget God. God's my friend. Remember I don't remember God's my friend.
What's that you said that when when I was quoting this book, that was like God can handle you being like I hate you God, like like like arguing with God, you know, is that thing?
And you're like, God's my friend. That's good God, that's a good merch. God is my friend. By the way, Celery Juice, you've heard about this for for those of you who are unaware, huge culture around first thing in the morning before anything you Juice, Celery okay, eight ounces right, what did did I bring this up on the side, Yeah, you just said celery juice.
Okay, because I asked you medium manical I've been doing.
Do you know who this is?
You do?
Hello? This is this podcast not called Pooh Goop backwards. This is one of the tent poles ofop is medical media. I know, but this is what I'm saying.
I discovered him and Celery juice yesterday.
What the fuck?
Okay, it's all right because you introduced it. And I'm sorry, I'm sorry crazy, you know, I'm just still dialing in the adderall I'm sure. Yesterday a woman said, and.
I just said, it's always a woman.
She goes, a little Celery juice is an absolute must daily. Oh, and I go what Okay, She's like, well, that's just like yeah, like that's just you just do that. And so I start looking and I know the website. The guy liked, Yeah, it's nature's miracle. It's been healing millions. Apparently he's been pushing the salary agenda like since.
He was a child. Okay, so it's full past life.
Yeah, yeah, okay, it comes in.
He's like a child.
And he said people others try to make it their own Okay, I saw something like that and ginger. Others try to make it their own, add lemon or whatever, and he says, those are great things for later in the day. This it has to be pure, and it should be sixteen ounces.
You can start with eight. It's too much.
Whoa, he said, some people feel good on I'm thirty two.
Oh God, by the way, I go, okay, well, what am I supposed to go to arawon?
No?
Obviously I can't liver.
Livery service of celery. No, okay, this is huge. I'm finally interested in juicers.
Oh well, of course I didn't think. Here's a fool where I haven't been, and I've been the one begging. I even I DMed a couple places. They laughed at me.
They're like, sweetie, No, okay, well I DMed her.
Oh I think I DM them in the eighties. But let's try again. Okay.
Because the woman I said, she said, I was like, what kind juicer.
And masticating versus whatever?
And then she sent me her arm and the omega, which is like the literal one the and it's horizontal.
Yeah, I know, craasticating. Yeah, let's do it. I can't believe Jacqueline. I know I said this on poog because how could I have this podcast? And I'll talk about this I for weeks. I want to say, a couple of weeks. I was doing stellary juice. I was doing it in the morning first thing. I just but of course, like anything, you probably have to do it for three months to feel anything, and who the hell can do it? I mean, I'm sorry, I'm here to declare it completely untenable.
It's not possible. Also want to Okay, so you're very expensive, it's very expensive. It's very expensive, celery, Yeah, sweetheart, No, yeah, are you joking? I'm not joking. If you're if you're juicing every day.
Throw it in a glass yourself with a your own salary.
Two stops, you two bunches or whatever, and you're obviously gonna be juicing for two Yeah. It's like this is I mean, you're looking at sealery. It's like seven dollars a day. Let's look this up. Okay, organic, Yeah, I got to be organic.
Yeah.
See what the market value here is obviously depending on.
Your cell, on your local cross I mean two okay, I'm sorry, but grow yourself.
Seeing two fifty I'm seeing go up to four twenty nine. I'd say a median price is three dollars three fifty row your cell. Look at this, three eighty nine the price of salary.
How much salary for I'm gonna write sixty I'm gonna write thirty two ounces?
Who well, then you're really going crazy.
Well that's that's no, because that's just that's for two sixteen ounces each. Oh right, sure, So how much salary do you need for sixteen ounces? It says one salary bunch makes anywhere from eight to sixteen. It's a wide range. Surprise, surprise, Okay, I thought I saw celery growing in water. Yeah, looks like you just drop your the end of your celery.
No water growing celery at your house. Wow, it's not possible. How do we grow celery from scraps? Yeah, so it's been two weeks. It takes two weeks to grow it, and they juice it in four seconds. Adds up. You have a whole room, a celery room in your house. That's what I'm thinking.
I mean, I guess, I guess the other.
Untenable celery delivery. I don't know, Okay, I feel there's a woman I know there's a fancy woman. I know, she's really into this. She does a full celery delivery service, so she gets celery dropped off in a box. Okay, so this is a full life, you know, devotion, and she's gorgeous.
So hey, and I mean, but like, right, okay, that's interesting. What about misfits? Isn't that a thing with the whole misfits celery?
Oh honey, imperfect produce ain't gonna cover this.
Really, no imperfect foods, perfect celery, Jacqueline.
Yeah, you think you're gonna start for years every morning waking up and drinking the celery juice. You don't need to.
I mean, I've done antidepressants for nineteen years or something.
If it were on pill form, I would do it too. The labor of the juicing and the juice. You're not taking your fish oil, are you. Oh it's a really good point.
I know pill form has not saved us.
I've been doing fatty, I've been. I'm gonna post the probiotics I've been on because I really do think they've helped a lot with stomach pain. And I sent a thing to Pendulum.
They dropped some new probiotic and I go I just sent a d I'm like, you have our addresses.
We'd love it. We have to go. I could talk all day.
I know I love you.
I love you, miss you. Miss you too. That was Pooh. If you enjoyed Pooh, please subscribe, rate, and review.
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