231- Harnessing Hardship: Transforming Adversity into Personal Growth

So I'm going to give three reasons why it's good . I mean generally , this topic is not limited to three , but I'm going to give you three very , very good reasons why hardship is actually good for you . So the first reason it makes you re-examine your choices . If you're aware , of course Remember , I've said it in a few episodes awareness is key .

Hardship , if you allow it , of course , makes you re-examine your life choices . Either you could choose to double down on it or you can make changes . In short , it makes you self-reflective . I'm going to break those reasons down further . That's reason number one . Number two gives you an opportunity to grow . Assume if you pick the latter .

Gives you an opportunity to grow , to become more resilient , wiser , stronger . It makes you adapt better to the situation , because if life was easy , what's the point of learning , what's the point of trying new things ? Right , so it can be resilience , adaptability , in short , if you want to put it into more concise wording .

And then the third and final reason for this episode is gratitude , appreciation . It makes you want to appreciate more of the simple small things in life , like the fact that you're living . Trust me , emotionally , you're going to feel the opposite . Believe me , I know I used to feel that .

If you allow it once again , and awareness being the key , it helps you to appreciate what you have in life and the simple little things like going for a walk , having friends or family , having a job you know , things that people tend to complain about and act very ungrateful in general or the amount of money you have .

Okay , you know there's some rich who are very unsatisfied with billions . They want to become a billionaire . I mean , pursuing for money itself is not a problem , it's how you do it . That's where it becomes a problem . If you have to deceive people , hurt people to get that kind of money . That's a problem .

Become a very good business strategy , execute it and help people . That's not such a bad . It's not such a bad thing . I , you know , I always disagree with that saying that the money's all evil . I believe and this is not unique for me that money is an extension of the person .

Money is simply an extension of the person because if the person don't have good intent , well , it's going to show . Or this person just wants to get high a lot , well , that person's going to find a lot more drugs . You know , generally speaking , I don't want drugs . Generally speaking , I don't want to get too deep here .

I don't want to get into the whole rich nuance territory . I want to try to keep this short and simple . Appreciation , gratitude is the third reason . Remember once again , it's not limited to these reasons . So for the comment section , you can add additional reasons why hardship is good . Yeah , get involved . I want you to be involved .

If you're listening to this , I'll go join a youtube or rumble heck . Even bus bus probably might be ideal for users who are listening through an audio medium . And then youtube and rumble . First one . You call it reflection , examination , introspection , whatever you want to call it . Hardship , if you allow it , makes you look at your choices .

It makes you look at it in a more in-depth manner . In general , hardship is going to make you question is this really the right decision ? Do I need to persevere , double down on it or make some changes . Well , that depends on the situation .

If you really want to mend your friendship , for example , you might need to make some changes , especially if the last conversation didn't go too well . If love is pursuing a very hard goal , you might have to think of a new strategy how to reach that . It could be a monetary goal , a health goal or whatever other goal you have in mind .

Other goal you have in mind ? Just examine your life and there's no one size fits all here . Understand everybody walk into a unique journey , so solutions are going to be unique . That's something you need to figure out .

Now expect me to spoon feed you some answers and , trust me , some of you are not going to want it anyways , and I know when it's in my place to speak , and I'm going to give you a very good example Don't come to me for relationship advice . I'm single . Don't do that . It's not wise . I have experiences .

But if you want to maintain your marriage , don't come to me with that . When it comes to analyzing people , I could give you some tips on that , or I could give recommendations on politics . If you lean Democrat , I'm going to advise you one way . Well , I think you should vote for Harris because of ABC or Trump . You should vote for him because of ABC .

I can give you more political analysis and what I truly think . I try to separate political analysis , facts and , in my personal opinion , a lot of people are very bad at doing that . Both sides of the aisle . Both of them are very , very terrible . Why am I going to make this episode too political ? I'm just not going to happen . It's not going to happen .

So it makes you re-examine . If you want to repair a friendship , I think you need to approach it with very good intentions and with understanding . Expect to change people's minds , at least not overnight , because we like to believe our own stories . Yes , in general , humans are egotistical and selfish Part of your human nature .

We like to hear ourselves more than other people and , generally speaking , if you're a highly evolved person , if you're a highly spiritual human being , this doesn't apply to you . I've talked to normal human beings and that's just the vast majority . So make sure you re-examine those choices . Am I doing the right thing ? Do I need to make changes ?

And sometimes it's a matter of just keep going , like a marathon . You can choose to quit in the middle of the race , but I can just continue that pursuit to get to the finish line , and I don't know why I'm giving a marathon example . I'm a chub . I'm chubby , okay , overweight . Maybe I need to do a marathon to lose my weight .

So for me that would be a hard situation and if you're really determined , you'll keep going , no matter how you feel . Look , I know feelings are important in certain times . Yes , I did use the word certain times . But feelings come and go . They go up and down , sideways , scribble , scrabble , all over the place . Feelings are directionless , they are erratic .

You got to override your feelings in some situations . If it's a gut feeling , it's different . If it's your brain , sometimes it's just acting based on past experiences just to protect you , and sometimes it doesn't serve you well .

It doesn't serve you well Self-reflection , introspection , flexion , whatever you want to call it , if you're allowed it once again , because it's your choice at the end of the day . This is why I keep saying that it makes you think deeper and more critically on what you're doing , and there's no one size fits all .

Sometimes you need to just double down because you're feeling like crap , or sometimes you've got to take a step back and continue again when you recover , because you know you do need rest . Rest is not going to tell you to grind yourself to death . No , not at all . Don't do that . All you're going to do is hurt yourself and eventually get yourself killed .

If you keep going , then family's going to miss you . Loved ones are going to miss you . People at work they're going to replace you sooner or later . So at least do that for yourself and your family . It makes you refocus on your priority . You want to spend more time with family ? Well , you got to cut down some things .

If you want to travel more , you have to change the way you spend your money . Okay , I'm just giving you just simple things . It makes you reflect . For example , you want to travel more , but yet you're going to all these local parts . I mean by local is within the state or county .

Okay , you're spending exuberant amount of money , but you want to go to foreign countries , but yet you're running out of resources . Unless you're filthy rich , then of course , you can do that , but not everyone is filthy rich . So you got to make sure that your actions align with your priorities .

So hardship could help you with that , if you allow it , and I think I already said enough about the reflection part . That's reasonable . Number two growth .

Growth helps you become more , more wiser , more stronger whatever positive amplifying adjective you want to use in there , it's fine or more resilient , as you deal with the hardship again , well , you're not going to be thrown off or surprised like the first time . And I'm going to just give another example for me . I volunteer as an usher in this church .

This is a growing opportunity for me because normally I am not used to talking to so many strangers , assisting so many strangers at once . But this was an opportunity for me to break down one of the barriers that I pose on myself .

It served me well when I used to be depressed , but it's not serving me well now because I am no longer depressed and it's cutting down a lot of social opportunities and opportunities for me to do good . So I volunteer as an usher and it helped well . And then it amplifies even my strengths as well . Resilient is when I make an arrow .

I turn it into a lesson instead of a personal attack . For example , I forgot to collect a few envelopes . Okay , I just take the people's advice and help right away , and some some of the congregation does help me . This point right there . So a point right there says tell me , there's a lady there . But I already know what that point is .

I'm a very visual person so I could make that connection instantaneously . It's a learning experience because I'll be more up on stage . Sometimes I don't mind being on stage . I'm an anvil for this .

The reason I call myself an anvil for this is Sometimes I love talking to people , I love being in social environments , and there's just times that I don't want to be bothered at all . I want to be as lonely as a hermit crab . Well , not lonely alone . I want to be alone . There's a difference between alone and lonely .

Lonely is you feel like you're alone and nobody's there to help you . But yet you want to be alone and you want to spend time by yourself , to relax , reflect or take care of your personal tasks . But those are differences between lonely .

Feeling lonely means you feel like everybody's against you , or it doesn't even necessarily need to mean that this means that , oh , no one wants to be your friend . Oh , I have to be alone to be safe , because people are going to hurt me . People are going to make me look stupid . People are going to make me look stupid . People are going to make fun of me .

People are going to criticize . People are just going to criticize no matter what . So you got to learn not to take a lot of people's criticism very , very seriously , especially if they are not in a higher level than you Like .

For example , if a lonely person who does not know how to talk remember a lonely person who does not know how to talk , remember a lonely person who does not know how to talk in front of the stage is going to criticize you , you reject that one . But if you're hearing feedback from a very experienced speaker , then you take it .

And what I'm saying is , when a person's giving you feedback or criticism , you got to make sure you know who that person is . If that person's not doing better in his or her life , ignore it . That person just has a lot of nerve to say something . He or she should know their place . But you know , some people are just going to yap .

People are going to yap . You just got to pay attention to who is delivering . That . Advice Comes to marriage . Let's go back to the marriage example . When it comes to marriage advice , you go to someone who's been married for a long time To me .

I'm just going to give you reasons to probably either dump that person or work it out , but I'm not the best person . I have never been married , okay , so don't come to me with marriage advice Horrible stuff Okay .

When it comes to politics and even technology , even administrative tasks , data I'll be happy to help , more than happy to provide my expertise and slash or advice Marriage , no , and see , that's me being wiser . That's using discretion . This is why I mentioned this , because I know when to speak and I know when to be quiet .

But you also have to meet the position of the student the learner . Okay , because if you think you know everything , you also have to be in the position of the student the learner . Okay , because if you think you know everything , you just indirectly told everyone that you're an idiot . You don't want to hear it . Yeah , yeah , yeah , I know everything

. Okay , that's not a person who's not doing a hardship , well , or it's just a but okay , you know the other word that starts with an A , but I'm trying to speak more with decorum and cleanliness and decorum is my language as opposed to being edgy , foul-mouthed and controversial . Check my older episodes if you want that .

Every once in a while I'll be controversial . If I need to , it has to be with reason and necessity . It's not going to be just because I could be edgy . It's a very superficial reason and sadly I used to say hardship may reflect on that . That's the reason number one . It promotes growth .

For me to change how I approach people , I found out I could be funny without pushing the envelope and it also depends on the audience . The audience don't mind foul mouth or controversy . I could go there , but some people don't want that . So people just want clean humor . Some people just want to be boring , humorous , subjective , okay .

Some people just find me just a foul mouth , angry person . Some people just say , yo , this guy is crazy , hilarious . Yo , this guy is stupid . You guys still got real funny . You know it's a slide , it's urban vernacular , okay . So it promotes growth , willing to change , okay .

And remember that comes with awareness , awareness , because if you're not aware , you're going to stay in this loop . And I don't have to quote the Bible about the Jews wandering around the wilderness for 40 freaking years because they were hard-headed , complained , they moaned and whined . You don't want to be that example . You don't want to keep repeating .

You don't want to keep doing the mistake of repeating that same error playing the victim card . Look , I get it . Life is hard . I'm not denying that it can't be good . If it's too easy , you're all going to be a bunch of fat , lazy dummies and then , when the enemy comes to invade , it's going to be easy for them , right ?

And let's get to the third reason and remember once again , it's not limited to that . So if you have additional reasons why hardship is good , provide in the comment section . Just provide in the comment section , okay . As for YouTube , rumble and Buzzsprout , or even give a review , give a review through Apple Podcasts . I'd really appreciate it .

I know I've been slacking off with that one . So , third , appreciation . Appreciation , it makes you appreciate , if you allow it . It makes you have gratitude for the simple , small pleasures of life . You're able to walk the sea , maybe have income . Well , that's probably slightly tone deaf . We still dealing with inflation and potential recession .

As you should appreciate life . What do you have ? Count your blessings . Do you have a good partner that you're married to ? Do you have good family members , good friends you can rely on ? Do you have a nice house ? Do you have good looks ?

Well , you should all say it to yourself , even though society may deem you as ugly , according to you according to yourself . Do you look good ? Are you breathing ? Are you still able to talk , see , feel , touch , smell ? Do you have a car that has work ? Do you have internet ? Do you have food ?

Do you have water , shelter , are you able to walk to the park and experience a sample of nature ? And then , when you're really stressed out , and if you're aware , if you have coping techniques , one advice I can say is go to a park or go to somewhere near a river . That has a common effect .

That's my recommendation , or , for some of you , it makes you appreciate that you have good habits . Yeah , why not appreciate good habits ? Do you stress out ? Do you meditate ? Do you exercise ? A lot of us forget to count our blessings . We deal with hardship . Let's use the self-reflection and the growth we have to do some appreciation , some gratitude .

Again , all comes down to awareness and allowing hardship to do that . The opposite is just play the victim . Oh , my life sucks . I'll never get any better Because you're not doing anything to make it better . You're just in love with the problem . Yes , I know this is tough for some of you to hear this , but you are in love with your problem .

You are especially those who's been stuck at the same problem for a long time , and for me I'm just going to use my metric For me , a long time is six months , two years . Of course Long time is six months , two years . Of course it depends on the situation , but for me , in general , it's six months , two years .

Then I even tell a person you're wasting my time with advice , go love your problem . Some of them even tell me I don't love my problem . Yes , you do , because you've been having the same dang problem for months or even years . All right , don't tell me you don't love your problem . Don't tell me you do not love your problem . Yes , you do .

Okay , the more you appreciate life , you'll realize that life is funny , life can be wacky , life is strange . Is it tough too ? Of course , but at the end of the day , you can't control how you handle it , except for those who want to embrace victimhood and go on autopilot . Just curse at every single person that looks at you . Funny .

Yeah , it's going to make you look like a real tough person . That's not appreciating life . Appreciating life is seeing . Yeah , you go recognize the bad , but you don't let the bad take over . I know it's easier said than done , but it's worth it . It's appreciating the good conversations you have with some strangers .

Yeah , I appreciate certain conversations that I have with strangers , I do . Certain times I appreciate them more than my friends and family because certain of them provide sage-level wisdom . Of course , there are those who speak a bunch of crazy gobbledygook . Use your judgment to discern what is what . Is it valuable advice or is it goblin gook ?

Okay , so again appreciation , and I'm going to throw in the God aspect again . God loves and we appreciate . Appreciate the trees he created , the mountains he created the rivers , the entire earth . Yeah , we humans create something , but for the most part it's with God's allowance .

Actually , no , god just allows many things to happen because of free will , and many people attack God when things are going awry . No , it's because we humans choose to be evil and foolish . God could have been a communist , but never . The leader just intervened and just stopped all of it , but we would have been criticizing God .

Oh God , you're so hard-headed , you're such a dictator , I don't know how to let loose . Trust me , some of us crazy human beings will say that Instead . Pray well . God helps you when you're truly ready . God wants to help you when you're truly ready and receptive . He's always going to help us . Because we pray with our biased thinking .

We want certain answers , answers , we want prayers to go our way . Sometimes he's giving the answer but we might not like it on how we receiving it . We might not like it on how we might not like what we're receiving or like the way it's being um sent to us . It could be through a friend , you know , I don't know .

You have to be in relationship with God to find that answer and we need to listen , be more sensitive to the Lord in general , and that's why I'm working . I'm not sure you see any improvements , but if you do , good . And if not , so be it , but at the end of the day .

But at the end of the day , if you want to be with God , it's not easy , it's not , but I prefer it more than anything by other hardships without the Lord . And you have to be with God when you truly want to be with God , not because you feel forced , not because of certain situations , all right .

And the final thing to appreciate appreciate that for especially those who got some spiritual sense that God or higher power exists . Appreciate that , if nothing else , okay , a lot of people don't get to live and they bring it to a scientific level . Let me bring this down to a scientific level , and this is going to get a little gross .

Let's talk about sperm and ovaries . When the sperm is being deposited to the vagina , out of millions of sperm that are being sent , only a very few survive . Since you're born , you are the fortunate one . Many of your potential siblings have died in the process . I know it's a harsh way of saying this Appreciate that you live .

If you don't appreciate life , well , of course I'm going to take things for granted . I mean , americans , we take our rights for granted and the government is just stripping our rights away little by little , and this is not a Democrat or Republican talking , it's just the truth .

Okay , and since we are ignorant and take our rights for granted , we're being stripped away .

We're being stripped away little by little and we need to be more cognizant of that and we need to vote appropriately on what benefits the people , what benefits we , the American people , and for those of you who are in a foreign country , well , I just hope you do what's good for your nation . That's all I'm going to say .

Americans , we got to get our act together , because if we don't , we're going to lose our rights and I'm going to say , eventually , the nation . I know that sounds like a right wing talking point , but there's a lot of truth to that . And , trust me , this is not to give Republicans free points , because I've criticized them on a lot of issues .

It's like a Dems suit , got my issues with both of those parties . I appreciate people in general and I'm willing to talk to them . That's why I don't have that super critical victory Only when things are super outrageous . Okay , and one more thing I want to bring up before I finish is a little side topic Susan Wood , just former YouTube CEO .

You know she died at age 56 from lung cancer and look , she did many things that I disagree with . Youtube Censorship was through the roof and I didn't like that . I didn't agree with a lot of decisions that she was doing . Youtube is becoming a super corporate company . I mean , I guess I was inevitable . I guess it was inevitable .

There's more pro advertisements than pro creator . I would prefer to be a little more pro-creator because we do contribute a lot , not just the advertisers . Yeah , you could allow ads . I'm not against ads . The fact that they have done multiple adpocalypses due to decide to take a draconian approach against free speech and I disagree with that .

And some information that was censored was actually valuable information during the pandemic . My biggest criticism always goes to Fauci Trump social media companies . You're promoting certain ideologies and certain information , but some of that information could actually help people . And let people speak gobbledygook . And let people speak gobbledygook .

And let the public decide if those actors are crazy or speakers , doctors Let the public decide . Now , with that being said , all I have to say to her is oh God , allows her to go to heaven . I pray for her soul . That's all I can say . You know I'm not going to make her a villain because she's not .

Google's the alpha bit , google's the Alphabet , google's the parent company . Well , it is Alphabet Inc . That's the company name , the legal name . Google runs YouTube . So I would say the Google leadership as well has some part and some blame in that . All I'm going to say is God rest her soul .

Hope the family gets through that tough time of losing a mother , wife , sister . It's tough for anyone , especially those who are close to her . God rest her soul . God can forgive . So that's all I'm going to say . All righty , then let's wrap this up . So remember three things I've said about why hardship is good .

One reflection makes you see your choices different . Two growth it makes you more resilient , wiser . You're not going to come up with the same approach over and over again and expect a different result . That's the foundational definition of insanity . That was a paraphrase quote of Albert Einstein . Okay , keep doing the same thing , expect a different result . That's called

insanity . And then appreciation If you allow it , it can make you appreciate life just a bit more , because there's always somebody in general that has it harder or crazier and sometimes , sometimes they can handle it better . It's because they have gained all that wisdom , self-reflecting , being more resilient and appreciate , and they have done that more than you .

Do not be jealous that they're doing it better . If anything , you should pick up on that advice . It could potentially be life-changing . Okay , appreciate that person's advice , okay . And that's the third final point appreciation . And if you have it too easy , you forget , you complain with one little inconvenient , then one little hitch happens .

Okay , you do that a lot and I'm not trying to call you out . Just give yourself permission to self-reflect on life . And I want to say this , even though I don't know you very well or not at all , but you matter to God , yes , you , you matter to God . You matter , and this is the only reason why I am being brave to be saying this episode .

If it touches one life , great . If it touches 10 , even better . If it touches a life , great . If it touches 10 , even better . If it touches a thousand , awesome . If it touches millions somehow , holy blee . I am eternally great , even if I choose to end this podcast . If this ends up being the best episode , so be it .

I'm speaking more out of experience and from my heart , okay . So that's all I'm going to say to that . So this is my call to action Subscribe , donate if you want , and have one-time donation and recurring subscription fees . Okay , from $3 to $10 . Yeah , I'm not asking for a lot of money . It's entirely up to you .

I want to make sure it's voluntary and that you have enough to do other important things in your life . This is , if you want to and have extra bucks , okay . Share this comment , like that will help the algorithm just to spread this episode to others . So I'm going to keep it as general as possible and as simple as possible .

With that being said so , from wherever , wherever you listen to this podcast , you have a blessed day , afternoon or night .