Today’s guest, New York Times bestselling author Rachel May Stafford, confided to her friend that the fruits of her successful career were starting to sour. She had become stressed, depleted, and was feeling used—all of it contaminating her joy and sense of purpose. Her friend Shannon replied with a wise reminder, the way only our truest friends can: “Rachel, you’re a mapmaker, not a baggage carrier, not a tour operator, and not a travel agent. You are there to guide and accompany people through...
Jul 30, 2023•48 min•Ep. 333
Today we’re building on 319: Who’s Sitting in the Board Room of Your Brain? With Adrian Klaphaak . . . and 328: Accessing Your True Self Through IFS, full Pivot x Career Pathfinder podcast episodes (Spotify playlist). If you are looking for a little support and guidance on finding your purpose, or best next step, check out Adrian’s Career Pathfinder Program and apply promo code PIVOT for a special offer on his group training. If you’d like to work with him one-on-one, he just opened up a few new...
Jul 23, 2023•42 min•Ep. 332
Research shows that negative interactions take a significant toll on all of us, carrying as much as five times the impact of positive ones. And yet, most people don’t realize how much microstress they’re under. As today’s guest helps reveal, we’re not just affected by the big, obvious stressors, but by the little moments throughout each day rippling beneath the surface. Karen Dillon and her co-author Rob Cross call this an “unrecognized epidemic,” one that’s invisible and relentless—in this conv...
Jul 16, 2023•47 min•Ep. 331
Raise your hand if you love Reality TV! Now admit to that in public. Now choose that as your academic discipline—to study and teach sociology through the voyeuristically fabulous (and often fabulously fringe) lens of reality TV—and you’ve got today’s wonderful guest, associate professor Danielle Lindemann. If you, too, let these shows wash over you at the end of a hard day, binge-watching dating shows with increasingly quirky premises or even hate-watching famous families bicker and then make-up...
Jul 09, 2023•46 min•Ep. 330
As “recovering people pleaser” Natalie Lue opens her book, The Joy of Saying No, “Suppressing and repressing my needs, desires, expectations, feelings, and opinions to try to influence and control other people’s feelings and behavior was as natural to me as breathing. I thought it was normal to tell people what they want to hear (read: lie) to make them feel better. I believed I was ticking the boxes of being a Good Person by being kind, generous, hardworking, conscientious, loving, eager to hel...
Jul 02, 2023•51 min•Ep. 329
“There are no bad parts.” That’s a core idea behind Internal Family Systems, a form of psychotherapy that helps guide hidden parts of ourselves to the fore so they can be acknowledged and integrated. Today, recurring co-host Adrian Klaphaak and I are building on episode 319: Who’s Sitting in the Board Room of Your Brain? by talking about how IFS can clear blocks when navigating change, and modeling the process with JB in the hotseat. Are you looking for a little support and guidance on finding y...
Jun 25, 2023•55 min•Ep. 328
At 24 years old, Eric Zimmer was homeless, addicted to heroin, and facing jail time. In the decades since, he has found a way to recover from addiction and build a life worth living for himself, while coaching others through his programs and award-winning podcast The One You Feed, based on an old parable about two wolves at battle within us (a story I also share in Pivot). We had the great pleasure of recording in person—while meeting for the first time! This was extra special because of how muc...
Jun 18, 2023•47 min•Ep. 327
“Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.” —Anthony Weldon in The Court and Character in King James (1651) Are you an accidental fraudster? An unknowing victim? A righteous whistleblower? The possibilities are closer than you think. Today’s guest, forensic accounting professor Dr. Kelly Richmond Pope, is here to remind us that fraud can happen to—and be committed by—any of us. Among companies with over $10 billion in global annual revenues, 52% experienced fraud during the past 24...
Jun 11, 2023•43 min
Attending conferences can be overwhelming — even for the most excited extroverts among us—let alone the introverts who challenge their comfort zone in the registration process alone. Today, my friend Alisa and I do an in-person debrief of our recent week-long adventure at the TED global conference in Vancouver (my second time attending, her fifth). We cover conversation openers, the power of a genuine compliment, trying (and sometimes failing) to approach people we admire as a peer, handling the...
Jun 04, 2023•1 hr•Ep. 324
As today’s guest—imposter complex expert Tanya Geisler—notes, the global self-development industry is worth $41 billion as of 2021. She says, “That is a lot of money invested in making people feel terrible about themselves…and like they need to be fixed. (Think diet industry but for confidence.)” In this episode, we’re talking about the six ways imposter complex manifests, the ways that trying to eliminate it can paradoxically exacerbate feelings of unworthiness, and even more importantly: the s...
May 28, 2023•46 min•Ep. 324
Have you ever considered teaching for a university? Even if you don’t take the path of Ph.D. student pursuing a tenure-track position, you can land adjunct roles after reaching a certain point in your professional career. Today’s guest Alex Budak—who happens to be someone I went to high school and college with (and someone who gave me hope that I could succeed in the earliest days of self-employment!)—is taking us behind-the-scenes of pivoting into a professorship. Alex shares how he got his foo...
May 21, 2023•45 min•Ep. 323
“When there’s a fork in the road, take it.” That’s one of my favorite Yogi Berra classics of paradoxical wisdom. Pivoting is defined by its own set of paradoxes and tricky decision points, so today I invited a special guest to the pod to share two of her frameworks that I fell instantly in love with, and that I know you will too! We’re also celebrating the one-year bookiversary and recent Audiobook release of Sarah’s wonderful book, Expansive Impact: An Invitation to Lead in Everyday Moments. If...
May 14, 2023•18 min•Ep. 322
“Cultivate 12 people who love you, because they are worth more than 12 million people who like you.” That’s just one of many gems from Kevin Kelly’s new book Excellent Advice for Living: Wisdom I Wish I’d Known Earlier, bits of wisdom that he thinks of like handrails to grab when he needs a quick reminder about what is most important. In this conversation, we revisit our 2016 discussion about the power of human-AI partnerships, give you permission not to become a billionaire, help you lean into ...
May 07, 2023•46 min•Ep. 319
How ambitious are you? More importantly, how ambitious do you want to be in different areas of life and work? Today’s guest, Kathy Oneto, takes the long view on goals, especially for those of us who are naturally inclined to overwork until we burn out. Instead, we can be more intentional by toggling the dials of right ambition, right effort, and right time up and down as we move through different seasons. In this conversation, Kathy and I discuss managing ambition anxiety, how to know if you’re ...
Apr 30, 2023•50 min•Ep. 320
Who is sitting in the boardroom of your brain? Who is sitting around the table, challenging your decisions, making noise, and offering critiques? Today Adrian and I are walking through one of our favorite coaching exercises by offering up (and coaching each other through) identifying and describing three of our current loudest board members and who we want to hire moving forward. This work connects to a therapy tool called Internal Family Systems which Adrian will share more about in our next ep...
Apr 23, 2023•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 319
Hi Friends! I'm re-airing this announcement from the Free Time podcast as a friendly reminder that we made it to the nomination stage of the Webby Awards, the "Oscars of the Internet!" The Webbys celebrate the best and most innovative online content across websites, podcasts, games, apps, and videos. This nomination alone is a major achievement, putting us in the top 12% of nearly 14,000 projects entered. 📣 Between now and TOMORROW, April 20th: Please visit itsfreetime.com/webby and cast your v...
Apr 19, 2023•8 min
“It’s OK to be a late bloomer as long as you don’t miss the flower show.” —Jane Fonda That’s a quote that today’s guest, Jenna Valovic, pulled to remind herself that not all of us are what she calls straight arrows when it comes to career paths, landing on a singular purpose early without wavering, and experiencing success and achievement from a young age. Late bloomers, on the other hand, can learn to embrace the winding road—at least once they stop shaming and blaming themselves for not having...
Apr 16, 2023•43 min•Ep. 318
Are you feeling trapped by the infinite scroll of distractions? According to today’s returning guest, Paul Angone, we have all become cultural escape artists, what he dubs the “Refresh Generation.” Paul writes, “We are constantly getting a hit from our phone for the latest update. The iPhone is our cigarette, and too many of us are chain-smoking our phones." It’s time to get off the dizzying carousel of phone addiction, and relearn how to listen to ourselves and our day for aha moments instead. ...
Apr 09, 2023•46 min•Ep. 317
Today’s solo riff is on a three-word phrase that has helped quell countless waves of anxiety in the decade since I first heard it, wisdom passed from my friend Monica McCarthy's (aka MonBon’s) mom then to the pages of Pivot. Pardon the occasional panting (lol) and background noise—err New York City soundscape—as I recorded this one on a big hill at the park, running up and down while throwing a giant log for Ryder to chase. He chases sticks, I chase ideas! 🌟 3 Key Takeaways: Memento Mori, thoug...
Apr 02, 2023•16 min•Ep. 316
What would you do if you had more confidence? Today’s guest, Kelli Thompson, polled over 500 people with this question and received answers that were equal parts inspiring and heartbreaking. In this conversation, Kelli shares the story of walking down the aisle at her first wedding when her intuition was whispering that the relationship wasn’t right, but she didn’t yet have the confidence to listen. We discuss strategies for listening to that still, small voice within; how to stop “box-checking”...
Mar 26, 2023•46 min•Ep. 315
Joy and frustration can be equally motivating. Sometimes joy pulls our focus like a magnet to where it needs to be. On the other hand, sometimes being grumpy and frustrated is a sign we need to pivot in another direction. They both help us understand what roles or activities, or ideas we need to say no to to make sure we have enough space for what we want to say yes to. Today, I’m joined by recurring guest host Adrian Klaphaak, who is just returning from a two-month parental leave after welcomin...
Mar 19, 2023•46 min•Ep. 314
Is change whispering to you? For Khe Hy, a former investment banker on the fast track of keeping up with the corporate Joneses, the discomfort from following the status quo first started feeling like a pebble in his shoe. “Psst! There’s more out there for you,” it whispered. In this conversation, we talk about his decision to leave Black Rock, how he follows his instincts when building his new content and education business, and how sneaky “shoulds” and insecurity often stem from unmet needs we ...
Mar 12, 2023•45 min•Ep. 313
As the saying goes, “Worrying is praying for what you don’t want.” A close cousin is future-tripping: projecting and living in the future instead of being present with what is actually happening, keeping an open mind about whatever might happen next. If you are inclined to catastrophize, you’re not alone! But getting caught in a fictional movie can mean missing out on important opportunities, ideas, and relationships. Today, I’m talking about why we do this, how future-tripping manifests, and st...
Mar 05, 2023•41 min•Ep. 312
It’s time to leave guilt spirals, perfectionism, and hedging behind. Today’s guest, Lia Garvin, is sharing her favorite tools for reframing frustrating situations through powerful questions and helpful feedback. More About Lia: Lia Garvin is the bestselling author of UNSTUCK: Reframe Your Thinking to Free Yourself From the Patterns and People that Hold You Back, leaning into nearly ten years of experience working in some of the most influential companies in tech, including Microsoft, Apple, and ...
Feb 26, 2023•42 min•Ep. 311
I’m complete. Have you ever landed on that sense of satisfaction, perhaps after a peak experience when you’ve given everything you could? Often what quickly follows: Now, what’s next? My guest this week — the very first partner coach I brought on to help in my business — pivoted out of academia after an accomplished trajectory into running her own coaching practice. Several years ago, she was featured in Shana Gaynor’s wonderful Business Insider article, I went to a career coach, so you don't ha...
Feb 19, 2023•47 min•Ep. 310
“The Sensitive Leader is a wayfinder, not a truth teller” with all the answers. Learn how serendipity helped today’s guest, Ciela Hartanov, successfully pitch an internal project to co-found and lead The Google School for Leaders; why sense-making is an essential skill when pivoting; and how to “right-size” a proposal until you get a yes. We also discuss what it means to develop “identity agency,” how Ciela knew it was time to go out on her own, why building a personal brand isn’t the end-all-be...
Feb 12, 2023•48 min•Ep. 309
“No [person] ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river, and they are not the same [person].” —Heraclitus, a Greek philosopher from ~500 BC I share this quote in nearly every Pivot keynote because it speaks to the reality of uncertainty in every aspect of our lives, even when we’re not intentionally pursuing bigger career changes. Every day we are different, as are the companies we work for, the broader economy, our community, and even our physical, mental, spiritual, and em...
Feb 05, 2023•46 min•Ep. 308
Leaving the cool shade of a corporate tree with a great salary and benefits to start a business is never easy. But making the call mere months before a global pandemic hits seems on the surface to be ill-timed—to say the least. Or perhaps cosmic. Don’t feel bad for Tony McGaharan, who is a pro at finding the silver lining in any situation. Suddenly the market for his budding business went from Belfast to global through virtual events, and his business is thriving because of it. In this conversat...
Jan 29, 2023•48 min•Ep. 307
Is it too late to wish you a Happy New Year? Larry David, one of my favorite curmudgeons, would say yes — I have surpassed the HNY statute of limitations. While the “new year, new you” energy is still fresh, I invite you to conduct a calendar audit: What are your shiny shoulds? The coulds? The so goods? Today I’m sharing a crossover from the Free Time podcast and book about one of the most popular topics that readers ask me about most: Sailing the Sea of Shiny Shoulds. This also ties into one of...
Jan 22, 2023•24 min•Ep. 304
The opening epigraph to Luke Burgis’ brilliant book gave me such a chuckle that I can’t resist sharing it here: “We want what other people want because other people want it, and it’s penciled-in eyebrows all the way down, down to the depths of the nth circle of hell where we all die immediately of a Brazilian butt lift, over and over again.” —Dayna Tortorici via n+1 (as quoted in Wanting) In today’s conversation, we’re talking about mimetic desire and our relationship to wanting. It’s a fundamen...
Jan 15, 2023•48 min•Ep. 305
