Hello, and welcome to episode. So I thought just kick off this podcast. The first episode should be about me, you guys. So you can learn a little bit more about me, what I've been through and , uh, and so you guys could relate. Cause some people think I have such a very colorful life.
Well , but , uh , it took me a long time to get to, and I still work on it every day to get to us a stable state of mind , um, to say the least, but , uh, here at Penn podcast, it's a modern life with everyday topics with a vintage flair. So today I'm also going to tell you about my journey into the pinup world, which goes hand in hand with my life journey. So to start off , uh, ever since I was a child, I've always been chubby. I've always been chubby. I've been fat.
I own the word fat that way nobody can make fun of me. So I mean, a , I never knew I was fat. I mean, also if you didn't know, I'm a twin and she's always been thinner than me, but we don't look alike. So hopefully there was , well, I guess that helped not making that many comparisons to each other, but growing up, we did ballet. We did a musicals. We did all types of dancing together and I admire my sister very much, always wanted to be like her. And I loved sports just cause she loves sports.
And uh , we were both a basketball. I'm a basketball fan and she's a basketball fan, softball fan baseball fan, she's everything fan. And she got most athletic in high school. Uh , I did not. I was a , I guess you would say a bench warmer , but I made it to varsity and basketball. But during all these experiences that I had ,
Um ,
I did have it in the back of my head that I will never succeed in him because I'm fat and people will tell me I'm fat. Even my own family will tell me I'm fat. And if you're Hispanic, either they tell you [inaudible] or if you don't eat, then they'll be like, Oh, you're going to die. You need to eat. It's like contradicting, but I'm sure we all struggle with that. Uh , so I've always had that weight issue in what really hurt the most were the people around me that would say mean things to me.
And it's not that I never wanted to try is that I felt comfortable in my skin, but I fell off because I feel comfortable. Why can't anyone else? Why can't anyone else be comfortable with it ? And it really hit me when I left , um , to college, I went to college, the university of Florida and uh , you know, on the way to college, I graduated a 30 minute class. I was a student government treasurer. I was very involved and I played basketball. I'm still pretty good.
My culture would see, even though I didn't play that much, but I had braces at the time. And there was this fun game that , um , everyone
Called me like a champ because I got hit in the mouth of braces and I was bleeding and I kept wanting to stay in the game. So I guess I could say that I'm always a fighter, but when I went to college, I've always lived this life of like living with my sister. Don't make him fun. Cause I'm fat, but I'm like, screw it. I'm fat. I don't know . I don't know what to tell you. So when I went to college, the fatness didn't really have an issue was mostly,
I had an issue about being Hispanic. I was a , in my next episode, I have a guest and we're going to talk about that. It's just, you feel like a little muck , cause you were born. At least I was born in South Florida and you get there. It's like a home mix. And I went there for premed. I actually wanted to be a medical examiner.
Okay.
And you had to go to med school for that. But I worked at the morgue. That was my first job, I guess, intern, because I didn't get paid. And my job there was to clean bodies. I mean, if you guys want to hear stories about here cleaning dead bodies. Um, but yeah, I went to chemistry, but my life changed a lot because I went from growing up in a household. I would say that they were strict. I shared a room with my sister.
Um, so I really, really wanted to go away to college so I could have my own bedroom finally. And um, And um , It was inexperienced , not like when I hear other people say I experienced college and I got drunk and I tried a drug's now Mike's hers was more like, I got to try, I guess, normal people stuff. I got to stay out late. I had my own room, I had my own place. Um, I went on dancing. I didn't start drinking until I was 21, but uh , I never really drank that much. It wasn't really my thing.
Um, I just love going to concerts, going out dancing. And I really got involved again, like in college and I mean, like in high school and I got involved in student government, I became a Senator for the County and I became the Hispanic student association president. But there was an issue that I had with like, not feeling like I belonged and I've always felt that way because when I did sports with my sister, I didn't belong.
Cause I was like seen as the benchwarmer when I did ballet or any DNC . Uh , I , I feel like I didn't belong because I wasn't Skinny. And in high school, even though I was in student government, I mean, I was considered like not popular, but not a nerd. I wasn't that in between. I'm sure a lot of my viewers are in between. Um , not that I'm assuming, but I mean, I felt popular, I guess that's the problem.
I live in my own little bubble and a lot of people that know me know I live in a bubble, but I decided that I wanted to make friends. I didn't know anybody in college. So I tried out for this sorority and it was a Hispanic based sorority and it honestly triggered a of , um, depression. And uh, I realized , uh , women are ugly now in a sense that they look ugly, but they do. Um , They do make you, they want to be little used , so they feel better. And that's exactly what it felt like.
And they went off lies that weren't even true. And some of this stuff is like really personal, but it just honestly hurt me. And even my best friend, she made it so sorority and I didn't for some stupid reason. And I know now it's like stupid altogether, but you don't realize it when you're going through problems that it's your problem and you have to deal with it. And honestly , um, that's the realization that it's your life and you need a , I guess this is what I try to tell people.
Or when I'm in an issue, you know, you gotta realize the bigger picture is Don't worry that other people are going to think you're stupid for feeling this way. You're going to feel this way and just go with it. So , uh, it took me a long time, but I realized that I shouldn't listen to these girls say I need to do my own thing. I'm meant to butterfly somewhere else and be myself.
And , um, that's why I got really involved because I was like, well, if these people don't want me, I'm going to try to do my own thing and see if other people want me, but I realize you can't do it for other people do it for yourself. And that's so cliche, but it's so true. Cause then when I left college, I came back home to South Florida.
And if you're wondering, I did not make it to med school because , uh, I just switched my major so many times and I enjoy doing student government, putting on events and putting on , um, things for the community to unite people. So I guess that's what I do at Penn, South Florida. And that's what really , uh, Penn, South Florida is an organization, a meetup group that I run down South. And it's for people that love the rockabilly and pinup world.
And they just meet up usually once a month for brunch, for now with the, The way the world is, we haven't been able to meet up, but it's open to everyone and there's no membership and there is nothing. I put these events on to invite everyone to come. There is no, like, if you want to be part of this, you need to pay this or you need to look this way.
I made this on the purpose of what happened to me in college and what happened to me when I came back home, when I came back home, I tried to look for people in the community.
I tried to join pinup groups and it just didn't work out because at the end of the day, when you're in a group or when you're in a situation that you have to pay to be a part of, and I'm not saying that this is for everyone, but at least for me, it just made it feel like people were just trying to be your friend so they can have a title.
Or This is when I can't make a sentence, but people really just try to, when you're in a group, when you have to pay or, you know, I'm sure you guys know about memberships in different clubs and you just try to out one another or create drama for no reason. And that's why I decided my life and the people I want to make and improve. I want them to come because they want to come. And , um , that's really what I love doing with my workshops.
Whatever woman wants to come, whatever size, whatever hair color, cause I've been discriminated on my yellow hair. Uh, and I love going out and when I'm dressed up, cause I love dressing up every day . I mean, you only live once, so you might as well live it how you want. So if you want to go out there and PJ's you do you, if you want to go out there with a three piece suit, you do it. You want to go out there with yellow hair, highs , heavens and pink and purple dress.
You do it because you know what , at the end of the day, when you lay your head on that pillow, at least I know that I did what I wanted and I tried, and I'm not saying that, you know, I do this every day . I mean, I get scared sometimes, but uh, I really want , um, and this is why I wanted to make this podcast because I can't really express what I want through pictures. And I'm sure, hopefully you guys see the passion that I put towards events that I host and things that I do.
So it's, you know , one of my favorite accomplishment , Oh , accomplishments and greatest experiences was going to a rockabilly weekender because in South Florida, the rockabilly community is not that big. So when I had the opportunity to go to Viva East in Massachusetts, I went to the first, second and the third and I had the honor of winning this Viva East in 2018. And look at this, I had to put it back here. If you're watching it on YouTube, have my trophy that I won. Beautiful.
And then this past year, I mean early this year, I won beauty blogger, best beauty blogger of a 2019. So this, these awards were not just awards because I looked pretty or I took these awards as knowing that and for other people to see that you don't have to fit a mold. And I truly feel like I don't fit a mold and I never will. And I'm sure a lot of you feel this way and I just want to put it up there that be you. And , uh, I'm here.
If anybody ever wants to talk to me or send me a DM , um, I do get women and I appreciate it so much that come up to me and tell me that I make them feel beautiful because they thought that a bigger woman can't wear certain things or, you know, that's the number one thing I get from women that DM me or email me, or meet me in person at events. And it's not only about pin up because I have a lot of girls that come to my Pinot brunch, and they don't dress up pin up .
They come because they love the atmosphere. It's all about knighting and collaborating and uh, yeah. And I really try to do that every day. And, and uh, yeah, and if you're Oh, and I backtracked, but in case you're wondering what I did after college. I , uh, since I worked at the morgue, some people find that amazing. But since I worked at the morgue and I do love horror movies , uh, I decided , um, graduated with a business administration degree at USC .
And then I came down South and Miami has one of the best stuff . Funeral schools at Miami Dade college. And I became a mortician slash embalmer. I did that for a while , but I think it was an itch that I had since I was in middle school. And it really wasn't something I was looking for to doing for the rest of my life. Not that I didn't want to, it's just that I wanted to stay in South Florida. I wouldn't be able to live off it.
And I know a lot of people are going to criticize that, but it's my opinion. Yeah . Because a lot of things are owned by big corporations. And I really want to strive on spreading beauty and positivity across all communities and doing it with my flare . So I hope that you guys , uh, get to know a little bit more about me , um, little synopsis of my life and, Oh, I didn't explain how I got into pin up after I left college. When I realized, you know, I just got to do me.
I loved circle skirts and it literally started off, you know, seeing musicals that I loved growing when I was little, see my grandmother, she passed away before I went to college. But seeing her get dressed up really nice to go anywhere. And it really gave her pride. So for me, since I was down, I said, let me give it a try. So I started dressing up and it just, and then it just got into like, I've always loved the classic cars.
Um, that's the only thing I'm missing in my life is a hot rod, but soon enough I will get it. And , um, it just grew from there and I just was experimental and I found things that I love and it literally grew from the fashion of the vintage world. And then it grew into dancing and dancing. I actually met my boyfriend that I currently have Tim and , uh , we swing dance. Oh , well, I try to swing the he's good.
And yeah ,
It's really opened my eyes to letting me know that I want to help people. And I want to make people feel beautiful and it may be through my Instagram, through me talking to people, meeting with them, hosting meetups , um, hope hopefully one day while I'm teaching a conference up in Orlando, how to sew . And that really means a lot because I've always thought, you know, I'm not enough. I'm not enough. I'm weird.
Um , but you know, On the weirdness and just doing , and , uh , I love talking at events and being able, just to spread my knowledge to women and being able to hear them come back to me and say that, Oh my, I learned this and it's because of you. I did this and you guys don't understand how much happiness it brings to me and how passionate I am about it. And I know that , um, sometimes I don't express myself as well in Texas and stuff, but please know that I love every single one of you.
And if you're listening to this, I love you because honestly you have made me, you have been part of this process in my life and listening to the podcast and being able to grow with me. And, you know, I know that I'm self taught in a lot of my electronical stuff and my green screen for my YouTube Tiki Tuesday videos. Um , but you guys give me motivation to keep wanting to learn more and finding different avenues to get to you all.
So please make sure that if you have not subscribed to this podcast and subscribe, it's an iTunes, Spotify autos, and on YouTube, if you want to see it or play it in the background while you're at work or, you know, download it . And if you have any questions or any topic ideas, or if you want to be a guest in the show, you know, make sure to email me or text me at eight three, three, four eight pin up. I just feel like saying.com at the end, but it doesn't have a.com.
But again, thank you so much for tuning in and I will see you next Wednesday .