In this episode, Susan explors the roots of parental reactivity—those moments when we snap, yell, or shut down—and why they have less to do with our children’s behavior and more to do with our own unmet needs, past experiences, and nervous system responses. Recognizing our triggers with compassion can open the door to healing, not just for ourselves but for our relationships with our kids. Susan invites listeners to shift from shame to self-awareness—and take the first steps toward more connecte...
Jun 11, 2025•10 min•Season 3Ep. 29
In this episode, Susan tackles a common parenting challenge: how to stay calm in the heat of conflict. Drawing on attachment theory, neuroscience, and mindfulness, Susan introduces two powerful tools— shrinking the moment and using a mental anchor word —to help parents regulate their own emotions and respond more constructively when their children resist limits. She invites listeners to a free webinar for more in-depth strategies on keeping your cool during parenting storms. https://pages.susans...
Jun 02, 2025•10 min•Season 3Ep. 28
In this insightful episode, Susan is joined by Tracy Gillett of Raised Good for an honest conversation about parenting through meltdowns—those intense emotional storms that can shake both children and caregivers. They explore what’s really happening in a child’s brain during a meltdown, why these moments are developmentally normal, and how parents can show up with compassion rather than control. They also discuss the power of repair, the myth of perfect parenting, and how to trust your instincts...
May 16, 2025•17 min•Season 3Ep. 27
In this episode, I explore one of the most challenging aspects of parenting: children’s emotional meltdowns. But meltdowns are not signs of bad behavior—they're nervous system overloads signaling distress. I unpack the neuroscience behind these moments, the difference between tantrums and meltdowns, and why staying calm is more effective than trying to reason. You'll learn why emotional expression, especially crying, is essential for healthy development, and how your own regulation is key to sup...
May 14, 2025•16 min•Season 3Ep. 26
In this episode, Susan and Lenore Skenazy discussed the importance of childhood independence, free play, and responsibility, emphasizing the need to reduce anxiety in children by allowing them to take risks and make their own decisions. They explored the impact of cultural messaging and media on parenting practices, suggesting ways to promote resilience and social skills through programs like free play and after-school activities. Their conversation also touched on the challenges of screen time,...
Apr 29, 2025•34 min•Season 3Ep. 25
In this episode, Susan welcomes Dr. Delaney Ruston, a physician, filmmaker, and creator of the Screenagers documentary series. In this powerful conversation, they talk about how to parent with compassion and confidence in the digital age. Delaney emphasizes the importance of the "safety first" approach: creating a home environment where children feel safe disclosing difficult online experiences without fear of punishment. Susan and Delaney stress the power of presence, connection, and emotional ...
Apr 15, 2025•25 min•Season 3Ep. 24
Anxiety in children isn’t something to eliminate—it’s something to understand. In this episode, we explore how anxiety shows up in the body and why it’s actually a signal, not a flaw. You’ll walk away with a new lens on your child’s anxious moments—and a sense of what real support can look like. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/anxiety-podcast-2
Apr 08, 2025•14 min•Season 3Ep. 23
In this episode, Susan explores the rising issue of anxiety in children and teens, emphasizing that anxiety is not a flaw but a signal that something feels unsafe. She discusses contributing factors like social media, academic pressure, and global uncertainty, and she encourages parents to co-regulate using tools like movement and breath work. She reassures parents that their presence and understanding matter more than "fixing" the anxiety itself. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/anxiety-maggie...
Apr 01, 2025•15 min•Season 3Ep. 22
In this episode, Susan explores the importance of helping kids tune into their own wisdom and instincts, so they can think for themselves with confidence. Susan shares practical strategies for fostering self-trust, including asking thoughtful questions and helping kids recognize how their body and emotions respond to different choices. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/inner-wisdom-podcast
Mar 18, 2025•16 min•Season 3Ep. 21
In this episode, Susan welcomes licensed clinical mental health counselor and certified Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapist, Tammy Sollenberger, to explore how IFS can help parents navigate their emotional triggers and build deeper connections with their children. Tammy illustrates how understanding and embracing different parts of ourselves can transform reactive parenting into more mindful and compassionate interactions. By integrating IFS principles, parents can step into a more centered,...
Mar 17, 2025•25 min•Season 3Ep. 25
In this episode, Susan explores why kids lie and how parents can foster honesty with compassion. She explains that lying is often a normal part of child development, driven by self-protection, avoiding consequences, or imaginative storytelling. Susan emphasizes the importance of modeling honesty and guiding children toward making amends, helping them develop integrity and trust in their relationships. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/why-kids-lie-podcast
Mar 12, 2025•14 min•Season 3Ep. 20
In this episode, Susan challenges the traditional view of ADHD, reframing it as different brain wiring rather than a deficit. She explores how ADHD brains thrive on creativity and spontaneity while struggling with executive function and emotional regulation. She offers practical strategies to help ADHD children succeed and emphasizes the importance of co-regulation to allow parents to empower their ADHD children to thrive. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/flip-the-script-adhd-podcast
Mar 06, 2025•15 min•Season 3Ep. 19
In this episode, Susan shares an excerpt from her new class with Dr. Laura Markham on Sibling Harmony. They explore how parents can help their children navigate sibling rivalry and how to guide kids to resolve conflicts in healthy ways. Susan emphasizes the importance of parents staying calm and regulated, as children's behavior often stems from their parents' dysregulation. Susan and Laura also share how sibling conflict can be an opportunity for children to develop crucial skills like empathy ...
Feb 18, 2025•15 min•Season 3Ep. 18
In this episode, Susan addresses a parent's concern about their seven-year-old child exhibiting rudeness, defiance, and emotional outbursts, especially when asked to do simple tasks. Susan emphasizes the importance of staying calm and regulated and not reacting from a place of personal frustration. She also touches on the importance of connection, understanding the child's needs, and staying steady during challenging moments. https://susanstiffelman.com/handling-defiance-podcast-episode/...
Feb 06, 2025•15 min•Season 3Ep. 7
This is a recording of a free session Susan hosted with Dr. Laura Markham on January 11, 2025 to offer immediate support to those affected by the wildfires in southern California. To subscribe to Susan's newsletter and receive updates about additional free support sessions, text NEWSLETTER to 310-905-8165 and follow the prompts. https://susanstiffelman.com/wildfire-support-podcast-laura-markham/
Jan 11, 2025•52 min•Season 3Ep. 16
In this episode, Susan discusses some of the signs that co-parenting struggles are due to narcissism, rather than more ordinary issues like hurt or resentment. She shares the kinds of questions she gets from parents who are co-parenting with a narcissist. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/are-you-co-parenting-narcissist-podcast
Dec 02, 2024•15 min•Season 3Ep. 15
In this episode, Susan shares an excerpt from a past session with Byron Katie, whose self-inquiry method, The Work, has deeply influenced her parenting approach. Katie's process helps parents question and shift stressful beliefs to improve their relationships with their children. Susan invites listeners to join her class with Katie to learn more about these transformative techniques. https://go.susanstiffelman.com/byron-katie-class-podcast
Sep 17, 2024•11 min•Season 3Ep. 14
In this episode, Susan talks about the importance of allowing our kids to make mistakes and gain resilience by recovering from them. https://susanstiffelman.com/podcast-episode-helping-kids-make-mistakes/
Aug 13, 2024•20 min•Season 1Ep. 83
In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Ramani Durvasula, author of author of the new book, It's Not You: Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People , as well as the books Should I Stay Or Should I Go? Surviving A Relationship With A Narcissist , and Don't You Know Who I Am? How To Stay Sane In An Era Of Narcissism, Entitlement and Incivility . Susan and Dr. Durvasula discuss difficulties, grief and legal challenges associated with co-parenting with someone who has narcissistic tendencies. h...
May 28, 2024•41 min•Season 1Ep. 79
In this episode, Susan talks with Julie Lythcott-Haims about the challenges of parenting, particularly as children transition into adulthood. They discuss the ways in which parents' roles evolve as their children grow, and the importance of parents modeling healthy adult behavior for their children. Julie describes the ultimate goal of parenting as raising independent and resilient adults who can thrive on their own. https://susanstiffelman.com/julie-lythcott-haims-young-adult-podcast/
May 14, 2024•43 min•Season 3Ep. 13
In this episode, Susan explores the challenges children face with restlessness, fidgetiness, and hyperactivity, particularly in the school environment. She emphasizes the importance of movement, play, and imagination in child development, noting that traditional classroom settings may not always accommodate natural developmental needs. Susan suggests practical strategies for parents and schools to support children, such as incorporating brief movement breaks and providing tools for fidgeting. ht...
Apr 19, 2024•17 min•Season 3Ep. 12
In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Gabor Maté about attachment instincts, peer orientation, and the importance of parental presence in building a strong parent-child relationship. Dr. Maté explains how children's attachment to peers can affect their behavior and relationships, emphasizing the need for parents to maintain primary attachment with their children. https://pages.susanstiffelman.com/gabor-mate-podcast-episode
Apr 08, 2024•13 min•Season 3Ep. 11
In this episode, Susan talks with her friend and colleague, Robyn Posin, PhD. They discuss Robyn's book, "Go Only as Fast as Your Slowest Part Feels Safe to Go: Tales to Kindle Gentleness and Compassion for Our Exhausted Selves." They explore the importance of slowing down in today's fast-paced world, the need for rest as a sacred act, and the significance of mental and emotional well-being. Robyn shares practical tips and anecdotes to prioritize self-care and embrace a more mindful approach to ...
Apr 02, 2024•25 min•Season 3Ep. 10
In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Dan Siegel on breaking dysfunctional patterns we've inherited from our own parents and grandparents. They discuss how early interactions with caregivers shape individuals and how tendencies and behaviors can be inherited through epigenetics. Dan also explains the concept of neuroplasticity, offering hope that parents can reshape their brains to become more integrated and resilient. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-generational-healing
Mar 13, 2024•12 min•Season 3Ep. 9
In this episode, Susan coaches a new parent struggling to adjust to life with their 11-month-old baby. The parent expresses challenges in maintaining balance in their life after the baby's arrival. Susan emphasizes the importance of honest, open conversation in addressing these struggles and the need for vulnerable discussions with partners. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-new-baby
Mar 05, 2024•20 min•Season 3Ep. 8
In this episode, Susan coaches a parent whose kids have a hard time adjusting to the different rules and boundaries in their parents' two homes. Susan reassures this parent that boundaries help kids feel safe and secure in their attachment and role-plays a scenario to help this parent communicate for effectively with their kids. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/boundaries-two-houses-podcast
Feb 27, 2024•27 min•Season 3Ep. 7
In this episode, Susan helps a parent with an unusual dilemma: their family will be traveling for a year, and their young daughter is resistant to the idea. Susan discusses the importance of making it safe for the child to express fears while remaining clear and relaxed. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/helping-child-travel-podcast
Feb 20, 2024•22 min•Season 3Ep. 6
In this episode, you’ll hear Susan talking with the parent of a forgetful, somewhat disorganized teen with ADHD without micromanaging. This conversation goes deep, looking at how our anxiety can muddy the waters of effective parenting. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-teen-adhd
Feb 13, 2024•26 min•Season 3Ep. 5
In this episode, Susan talks with a parent who struggles with what she calls "ancestral anger" toward her preschooler -- a feeling of rage that stems from an unhealed part of her own childhood. Susan coaches this parent on handling the build up of rage when it makes its next appearance with her child. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-ancestral-anger
Feb 07, 2024•21 min•Season 3Ep. 4
In this episode, Susan talks with a parent who wants help supporting her middle child. Her 7-year-old daughter is struggling with the disappointment and frustration of being a middle child, so Susan uses a role-play to coach this parent on helping her child grieve the reality of her unchanging position in the family. http://pages.susanstiffelman.com/podcast-middle-child
Jan 30, 2024•22 min•Season 3Ep. 3
