Paper Cuts - podcast cover

Paper Cuts

Have you SEEN the state of the papers today? PAPER CUTS has. In our thrice weekly podcast, some of Britain’s sharpest commentators and funniest comedians come together to look at the madness, the strangeness, the obsessions, and – occasionally – the brilliance of our national press. Host Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalists and comedians like Jonn Elledge, Grainne Maguire, Jacob Jarvis, Ava Santina, Jacob Hawley, Marcus Brigstocke, Coco Khan and many more. Illustrations by Modern Toss: https://moderntoss.com
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Episodes

Barmy Braverman finally booted – plus The mad world of Doomsday Preppers

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today, The Homeless Secretary: Sunak beats the front pages by sacking Braverman in the middle of our show. What does it all mean? Hunker in your bunker: The Guardian goes underground with the Doomsday Preppers. Plus a book club that took 28 years to finish one novel, #FixTheHeadline and more. Miranda Sawyer is joined by The Critic’s sketchwriter Rob Hutton and comedian Matt Green. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: ba...

Nov 13, 202341 minSeason 1Ep. 84

Revolting Suella revolts – plus Farage is a Celebrity, Please Leave Him There

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Under my Suella-ella-ella. Suella Braverman is in trouble for her rhetoric on protest, but the Mail has her back. A politician to have a pint of piss with! Nigel Farage is rumoured to be joining I’m A Celebrity and the tabloids are all over it. Plus – Delulu for youlu… This new TikTok trend could change your life. Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Ava Santina of PoliticsJOE and comedian Fin Taylor. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and...

Nov 10, 202335 minSeason 1Ep. 83

Home Secretary Alone! Suella vs. the Met and Rishi – plus Boffins have a Napoleon complex

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Tory Civil War, again. Suella Braverman dares Sunak to sack her, and the papers are eating it up. We didn’t Work. The FT reports that venture capital collective office space company WeWork has collapsed. Plus, the Hic! Parade. British women are the top drinkers in the world, according to the tabloids. Alex von Tunzelmann is joined by journalist Jonn Elledge of the New Statesman and comedian Gráinne Maguire. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts...

Nov 09, 202338 minSeason 1Ep. 82

Never mind the Monarch! Inside the King’s Speech – plus The world’s poshest sex parties

Try our new science podcast WHY? at whypodcast.co.uk We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today, Not quite Colin Firth… The papers react to a dull King’s speech. Boring our socks off. The Guardian’s next target? Ankle warmers. Plus – Posh people have needs too. The Times has the scoop on the poshest sex parties. Miranda Sawyer is joined by Bunker Podcast host Jacob Jarvis and comedy writer Jason Hazeley. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: back.papercutss...

Nov 08, 202338 minSeason 1Ep. 81

Charles grits his teeth for Sunak’s eco-war – plus, How common are you?

Try our new science podcast WHY? at whypodcast.co.uk We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today, Not-so-green king: papers gawp as co-friendly monarch Charles must announce eco-hostile Sunak policies in his first King’s Speech. Windsor in the soup: the tabloids lambast Prince Harry for taking a private jet to a Katy Perry concert. Plus – Podcasts are for proles! Celebrity supersnob Nicky Haslam releases his latest list of what’s common, and the Times has the scoop. Andrew Harrison is joined ...

Nov 07, 202342 minSeason 1Ep. 80

Dorries lifts lid on Tory sex party sewer – plus Where’s your ****ing poppy, Britain?

Try our new science podcast WHY? at whypodcast.co.uk We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Poppy Panic! Bored of demanding that everyone puts on the biggest poppy they can find, the papers are in a lather about Gaza protests on Remembrance Sunday. I Want Ewe Back: Britain’s loneliest sheep is rescued then spirited away from the public and press. Plus Stranger than fiction. The Mail has more salacious revelations from Nadine Dorries’ definitely 100% factional book. Miranda Sawyer is joi...

Nov 06, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 79

Robo Flop! When Rishi met Elon – plus Dorries' bunny boiler fan fiction

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Best of fiends! Elon makes headlines as Sunak interviews him at AI conference. Mission Imp-ewe-sible. The Star’s campaign to save the world's loneliest sheep gets underway. Plus – Nadine’s Bunny Butcher. Revelations in Dorries' new book are truly hare-raising… reports The Mail. Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Holly Thomas and comedian Marcus Brigstocke. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: back.papercutssh...

Nov 03, 202341 minSeason 1Ep. 78

The bully boys of Downing Street – plus "You talkin' to me?" Robert De Niro's hating

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Toxic culture. The papers reveal the misogyny and backbiting inside No.10. ’Tis the season! The battle of the Christmas adverts is here, but some papers aren’t happy. Plus – The secret lives of celebrity assistants. As De Niro’s lawsuit continues, A-lister fixers spill the beans on the stars’ weird demands. Alex von Tunzelmann is joined by journalist Jonn Elledge of the New Statesman and comedian Fin Taylor. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirt...

Nov 02, 202330 minSeason 1Ep. 77

Dirty Dom Cummings lets it rip – plus The Guardian vs. sandwiches

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Cummings home to roost! Shocking revelations from the Covid inquiry – with sweary Dominic Cummings getting plenty of attention. Business Casual. City AM dives into the fashion of city boys. Plus – Bacon, Lettuce and Time Travel. The Guardian reveals how sandwiches have changed throughout history – and makes the beloved food… boring. Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Rob Hutton of the Critic Magazine and comedian Marcus Brigstocke. Support Pape...

Nov 01, 202344 minSeason 1Ep. 76

Captain Chaos: Johnson blasted for wrecking COVID response – plus is your inner Hulk the key to success?

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Mind virus. The papers react to the covid inquiry’s latest Boris Johnson revelations. Bad scare day. The Guardian reckons Halloween used to be more frightening. Plus – Angry management! The tabloids argue rage is the key to success. Jacob Jarvis is joined by journalist Jonn Elledge of the New Statesman and comedian Gráinne Maguire. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: back.papercutsshow.com Follow Paper Cuts: • T...

Oct 31, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 75

LOADED JOHNSON - who's paying Boris at GB News? – and the press pays respect to FRIENDS icon Matthew Perry

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Boris Johnson has a new job with GB News, and The Guardian has a deep dive on the ex PM’s filthy rich new boss. The press says goodbye to 90s sitcom legend Matthew Perry. Finally – The Star documents the strange case of the Somerset Gimp. Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Jonn Elledge and comedy writer Fergus Craig. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: back.papercutsshow.com Follow Paper Cuts: • Twitter: htt...

Oct 30, 202335 minSeason 1Ep. 74

Beatles say “Help! A.I. need somebody!” – plus, Still making voice calls? You’re officially old

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: A.I. Wanna Hold Your Hand. The Beatles release their final song with a little help from their friend artificial intelligence and the papers are obsessed. Straight to voicemail, old man! Your phone habits reveal your age, the Telegraph reports. Plus – Pulp fiction. Artist David Shrigley recycles copies of The Da Vinci Code and turns them into Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four. Why?? Andrew Harrison is joined by journalist Holly Thomas and comedian Athen...

Oct 27, 202340 minSeason 1Ep. 73

Royal Spy who Spooked Harry and Meghan – plus Secret origins of conspiracy theory

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Megxit means megxit! Brand new paper the Byline Times has a scoop on why Harry and Meghan really left the UK. It’s all a conspiracy, or is it? It’s been 60 years since JFK’s assassination, and the Guardian reckons paranoia about secret plots is only getting wilder. Plus – Murder on the stage floor! Can a bad review really kill off a play? Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Jonn Elledge of the New Statesman and comedian Gráinne Maguire. Support ...

Oct 26, 202337 minSeason 1Ep. 72

Big bonuses for bankers? In this economy? – plus Britney Spears’ shocking memoir

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Bonkers Bankers. Who covered the story about Sunak scrapping the cap on bankers’ bonuses best: the FT or the Star? Fears for Spears: Britney’s memoir is out and the Times and Guardian have harrowing details. Plus, A date worse than death: Tinder lets your mum 'give suggestions’ on your dating life and a Times journalist has given it a go. Alex von Tunzelmann is joined by Andrew Harrison and comedian Marcus Brigstocke. Support Paper Cuts and get mug...

Oct 25, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 71

Floody hell! The papers ignore Storm Babet – plus is Taylor Swift a spy novelist?

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Seriously Stormy. Storm Babet has battered the UK causing devastating flooding – yet only a few papers are taking it seriously. True Detective? The Mail reckons Taylor Swift has written a murder mystery… but we aren’t sure. Signed, Sent and Unopened! Columnists argue we should ditch the life admin and leave our emails unopened. Plus – Big Beasts. We take a deep dive into the fascinating world of large animals. Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist...

Oct 24, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 70

Suella blasts the Met – plus men vs. the truth

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Braverman fights the law. The Home Secretary has had a busy weekend with the papers picking apart her Rwanda plan and approach to protests. Don’t sleep on this! You aren’t sleeping properly, and the Mail and Independent are after solutions. Plus – You can’t man-handle the truth! Men are liars and the Times is holding them to account. Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Rob Hutton of the Critic Magazine and comedy writer Fergus Craig. Support Pap...

Oct 23, 202338 minSeason 1Ep. 69

A bad day for ‘Dr Death’ Sunak – plus Why we all want dates from the States

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Sunak’s bad day. You go on ONE goodwill tour to the Middle East… Next thing Labour win two historic byelections AND the papers are calling you Dr Death. It’s SO unfair. Plus, Y’all love Americans! We’re all looking for dates from the States (apparently) and the Times knows why. And The perfect crime. Would YOU pretend to be a mannequin to rob a shop? This Polish bloke did. And the tabloids love it. Miranda Sawyer is joined by Guardian political ske...

Oct 20, 202334 minSeason 1Ep. 68

Tory hopeful to voters: “F*ck off” – plus are animals stealing our jobs?

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Biden’s warning to Israel. The papers discuss the US President’s message to the Israeli government. What happens in Tamworth… Foul mouthed Tory hopeful in byelection gaffe. What are the papers predicting? Employee of the month! We look at the Guardian’s important investigation into some more cuddly colleagues. And the Extra bit: Bed-bugging the tax office! Finally we have some good insect-related news from the Mail. Jacob Jarvis is joined by Jonn E...

Oct 19, 202337 minSeason 1Ep. 67

The sex lives of Guardian readers – plus Darth Fader! Goldman Sachs boss quits DJ dream

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Oil can’t believe it! Greta Thunberg arrested outside a London oil conference and the Mail has pics. Please do stop the music! Goldman Sachs CEO forced to give up his DJ side hustle says the Telegraph. Plus – The Political Sextrum. Do Guardian readers or Tory supporters get the best sex? And the Extra bit: Sunny side up! The Star says the way you butter your toast tells us all about you. Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Holly Thomas and comed...

Oct 18, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 66

The Israel-Hamas crisis: Is this the British press at its best?

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The news from Israel-Hamas worsens with young Britons confirmed dead and missing, power and water supplies cut off in Gaza, and a fatal shooting in Brussels. How is the press handling this massive story? Plus – The Shawshank Reduction. Prisoners get their sentences cut due to overcrowding under a Tory government?? Recipe for Disaster! Banker fired over lying about… his sandwiches? In the Extra bit: Snack Attack. The horror of Walkers’ new Christmas...

Oct 17, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 65

WhatsAppocalypse! How Queen Carrie ran COVID – plus, A.I. teachers put us in digital detention

We read the papers so you don’t have to – now five days a week! Today: Press aghast as it turns out the Government fought COVID on Carrie Johnson’s whims. Would you send your kids to a school with an A.I. deputy head? And Notting Hell: Richard Curtis admits his movies look a bit dodgy in retrospect. Miranda Sawyer is joined by The Critic magazine’s political sketchwriter Rob Hutton and comedian Fergus Craig to pull the papers to bits. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-fre...

Oct 16, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 64

A terrible dilemma: How the press is covering Israel/Palestine – plus rich man avoids tax shocker!

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today, horror pictures. Does the press have a duty to run explicit images of atrocities in the Israel/Palestine conflict? Plus – That money was only resting in Bernie Ecclestone’s account. How has Parkrun revolutionised Saturday morning? And you’ve got my vote! An Austrian political party puts free beer on its manifesto. And the Extra bit: Swapping sides. Historian and former Telegraph Editor Max Hastings has turned on the Conservatives. Miranda Sawyer is...

Oct 13, 202333 minSeason 1Ep. 63

Prison Broke! No jail time for crims – plus Pound control to Captain Tom(’s daughter)

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Our knackered nicks. Judges are ordered not to send criminals to jail as prisons are full. Throw the book at them! Captain Tom’s daughter confesses to keeping literary earnings. Plus, Glitch in the matrix. A Physicist suggests we are all just living in a computer simulation... if only. In the Extra bit, exclusive to those in the Paper Cuts Supporters Club: Starm Foundations! Keir’s declared himself a YIMBY on house building. What on earth does that...

Oct 12, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 62

Keir’s glitter-sweet symphony – plus inside the MANopause

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: A Glittering Speech! As the Labour party Conference wraps up, what have we learned? Putting the “men” in menopause. The columnists take on the “manopause”. Plus Peak of Fashion! The Times has decided what you should be wearing this autumn. Plus, in the extra bit for members of the Paper Cuts Supporters Club: R&Booze. As Snoop Dogg drops a new wine, we wonder what other celebrities are in on the alcohol game… Miranda Sawyer is joined by The Bunker p...

Oct 11, 202343 minSeason 1Ep. 61

Starmer faces his big moment – plus Murder victim’s mum takes on True Crime industry

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Seeing Keirly now? The Labour leader sets his sights set on two terms but what will the papers think? A criminal enterprise. A woman’s son was murdered, so why did she attend a true crime convention? Plus Intergalactic Breaking News: Scientists have a big scoop about our very own galaxy. Host Andrew Harrison is joined by journalist and culture writer for CNN Holly Thomas and comedy writer Gráinne Maguire. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts a...

Oct 10, 202342 minSeason 1Ep. 60

Special edition: The papers react to Israel’s terror nightmare

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Hamas’s surprise terror attack on Israel has horrified the world. Now further pain is unfolding for Israeli hostages and Palestinian civilians. We devote today’s podcast to the crisis and how the press is covering it in the UK and beyond. Miranda Sawyer is joined by Oh God, What Now? podcast regular Andrew Harrison and comedy writer Jason Hazeley. Read more: Gideon Rachman in the FT https://www.ft.com/content/aa7eb6ba-6dc1-46dc-b96a-b7c3a1b0446e Ha...

Oct 09, 202333 minSeason 1Ep. 59

Stonking Starmer told to be bold – plus why can’t we be friends?

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Swing into gear! Labour trounce the SNP in by-election victory – but Starmer’s still being scrutinised. Plus, mate expectations – The average brit is down to only 3.7 true friends. And Eton Mess! The Papers reflect on the infamous public school. In the extra bit, exclusive to those in the Paper Cuts Supporters Club: Presidential Impoochment! Joe Biden’s dog has been evicted from the White House for biting staff. Alex von Tunzelmann is joined by The...

Oct 06, 202338 minSeason 1Ep. 58

Flat broke! Why Britain’s housing market is the worst – plus Papers fix your sex life

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Home is where the crisis is! The papers are shocked to learn that the English housing market is the worst in the Western world. (Where have they been?) Better Sex for a happier Britain. Is your sex life is rubbish? Let the Great British Press fix it. And Columnist Corner: As Guardian cult hero Adrian Chiles returns from the Tory Party Conference, we ponder the nature of his genius. And the extra bit, exclusive to members of the Paper Cuts Supporter...

Oct 05, 202336 minSeason 1Ep. 57

Sunak promises he’ll fix what he broke – plus Gen Z jonesing for astrology

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Sunak and the Giant Speech. The papers have the PM’s Conference speech before he’s even given it, and they’ve got TAKES. Plus Starry-eyed. The youth are turning to astrology, tarot and palm readings to make sense of a mad world. Can you blame them? And Whatsapp with that? The Covid inquiry is back, and some people’s messages are missing… Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Jonn Elledge of the New Statesman and comedian Marcus Brigstocke. Support...

Oct 04, 202338 minSeason 1Ep. 56

Truss and trains wreck Sunak’s conference – plus Trump’s day in court

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Manchester Disunited. Liz Truss is back and the Tory Conference descends into chaos. Fraud have mercy! Trump scowls through his day in court. Plus, Feline Yourself? The Guardian dives deep on what makes you a cat person. Jacob Jarvis is joined by journalist Ava Santina and comedian Fergus Craig. Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: back.papercutsshow.com Follow Paper Cuts: • Twitter: https://twitter.com/papercuts...

Oct 03, 202332 minSeason 1Ep. 55
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