Welcome to Oversharing with Overbees . I'm Jo . And I'm Matt , and each week you can tune in to hear us respond to your voicemails , go in-depth on our lives as content creators and hopefully leave you feeling even better than we found you .
With that being said , let's get to Oversharing . Oh man , podcast lighting . It's just , I look like I've been broiled .
That's not the lighting , Matt . That's what you look like .
I feel like other lighting it's accentuating other lighting's been forgiving yeah , that's what I'm saying . This lighting is not forgiving , this lighting is aggressively no what I'm letting you know is this lighting is very accurate to real life .
The other light has been forgiving okay it's not like where it adds 30 pounds , and this is worse than it is in real life . That's what you look like . I , a tomato . Don't like what you're saying , but it's not like where it adds 30 pounds , and this is worse than it is in real life . That's what you look like .
I , a tomato don't like what you're saying , but it's probably true matt got absolutely fried .
Matt just from like the neck up everything else is pretty I don't understand why you weren't wearing a hat all our hats bleed .
We have all these great hats I brought a bunch of hats .
I brought seven hats with us to the lake .
I didn't feel like putting them in the water .
I had four that didn't bleed with me .
Yeah , they were your hats , though I didn't want to put them in the water . That is true , I realized . That's why I burn my face and I haven't been burning my face pretty much ever lately is because I've been wearing a hat most of the time .
Yeah .
And for years I didn't wear hats .
Actually our therapist this week , matt , didn't have a hat on and she was like oh , I've never seen you without a hat .
And that blew my mind .
That's the top of your head . Huh , that was crazy . That was crazy . We followed through this week and here in what I like to call my macaroni bowl , because this is the bowl I make microwave macaroni in . It's not really good for ice , it's really .
Sweating . Yeah , I thought it'd be worse if it was like a metal bowl .
Yeah , no , you're right , there's a lot of ice in there , okay . Yeah , Matt wanted to make sure these were nice and cold they are cold , it worked . We have the Sunny d vodka seltzers here , which when I drink anything with a like vodka base I tend to get hives . So we're not testing it , but I am .
I am going to just take a small sip of each flavor , all right that wasn't very satisfying . I like them to like have a nice crisp like that , but then I want them to go , like you know sure uh , what flavor did you pick to start with ?
I didn't even . Oh , this is just tangy orange , okay you started with the original yeah I have gotten really mixed reviews in my dms about these .
It's either people are like they sneak up on you , they're so good , and other people are like it's the worst thing I've ever had it's not the worst thing I've ever had . I'm wanting it to taste like an orange kiss , alani .
It's not that . Here give it a sample . This should be sponsored , guys .
I'm scared , but it's not .
It's just pure bit . There's a real vodka finish to it , but the front end is sunny d .
It tastes exactly like an orange kissalani to me .
I can't taste , and I normally am really really sensitive to vodka . Sunny d you've got , you've got .
It's too bad , I can't drink those . I mean you can try . Actually it's not I really don't drink .
She's in , really sensitive to vodka . Sunny D , you've got a .
It's too bad . I can't drink those . I mean you can try . Actually it's not . I really don't drink ever .
You have like a handful of drinks this weekend and it ruined you for like the next 36 hours .
I can't do it . But you know what ? Guys In camaraderie for Matt , this is the only time you're going to get me to do this . I'm never doing this again .
You're not going to drink on the podcast regularly . No , well , you might , I think we should just be sponsored , and every week I just sample hard seltzers . Try a different seltzer .
I'm having a tequila seltzer high noon with Matt one , because I got a four pack or I don't know what I got . I did not come near drinking all of them . So all of them . So this one's grapefruit I haven't tried the grapefruit yet . I'm gonna drink like a quarter of this and then be like matt . Do you want the rest ?
I'm gonna have like three and a half drinks by the end of this podcast , so yeah , it'll be fine .
Okay , well , let's see if this has a like a zestier I think you're just not , do you think ?
yeah , thanks , well , I think you also have a technique that you like oh , I think you have . Like you're like , this is how it's done and I was just winging it and I thought you did great oh you were okay I think it was the sunny , d not you ? Well , I take everything personally , yeah okay , we're gonna try the grapefruit .
Okay , I really like that . I'm happy with my beverage . All right , guys and we're drinking and we're , we're good . This is a first an over sharing with the overbees first where we're both drinking , yeah , yeah well , that's because I drink like three times a year . That's true that's true but two times in this weekend . Let's go .
I guess I should clarify I'm not regularly drinking during this podcast .
No , but you have like one or two times , I think , the sex podcasts is where I brought it in . I think that's really the only time , though .
Yeah , I was like , I think I need some drinks before this .
Yeah , you rocked it . I love those episodes . I would do additional episodes to that .
I think I podcast about 10 , 10% better , at least you think . Just a little buzzed . Okay , it lowers the filter that I just always run all the time .
That's why I mean alcohol .
if I could take a medication that had the impact the filter reduction of alcohol but I could , like you know , drive the kids places Right Safely . I would take that . A downer but yeah , yeah , I just need something a little suppressing , but like I still need a stimulant also , so it's a whole . I think that's bad for your heart , I mean . Sure , but what ?
about my lifestyle . Matt today has been on one . I'm just gonna go ahead and start there . He started today . We had multiple tires that were not holding air anymore in our car and finally Matt that sounds bad . Yeah , well , it's where we were and Matt ordered new tires .
We had to take it today and we go and it's like a very stressful kind of morning because there's a lot of moving parts . My best friend's in town , she's heading home . We have both the kids .
We're moving around car seats , you know , just like the we're going to a tire shop I haven't used before yeah , like stuff's just a little crazy and I always keep the keys in the same place and always they're always in the same spot because I have systems in my life and matt is a big f the systems guy .
Not intentionally , no uh , and so he removes the keys from their usual spot , looks at me and lets me know that it's happening . And , uh , he bounces and is like all right , right , like you know , whatever , yeah , we were running late , we were running late . We get both the kids in the car . I'm saying bye to my best friend .
She's getting in her car and then Matt walks over and goes what'd you do with the key ? He's like did you put it back ? Where is ?
it . What'd you do with it ? To ? To be fair , you did handle it after I touched it . No , I didn't , you did , but then I picked it up how did I handle ?
Tell me about how I handled it okay , I pulled them out of your purse uh-huh they were on the counter , then you grabbed them , moved them around like handled them no , I didn't okay , that was the Subaru key . I don't know , that's okay .
I did not touch them . I touched the Subaru key after you took them , okay . And when I picked up the Subaru key , which is my Subaru key , okay , we have two .
One's mine .
Mine have the dangly things on them that you hate . I said we never got the other car key back from your parents .
That's yeah , said we never got the other car key back from your parents , that's ?
yeah , I said so .
I have your key I thought you were handling the keys to the , the car that I had to .
I was not you had already pocketed them okay , well , again , I thought they were in my pocket and then I couldn't find in my pocket and it's because when I put the kids into the car I put it in the car door , but it took me I don't know 10 stressful minutes to find them where I was uh , silently blaming you , that they were silently .
You immediately accused me immediately well , but after that I was silently blaming you were you really , I felt , justified .
You still thought it was me I just couldn't figure .
I was like I don't know where they would have been put matt's like immediately .
When he like doesn't have a rational of what he did , he's like it was joe , which honestly explains so much of our dynamics , because matt misplaces stuff all of the time and he never blames himself . He's always like and this is okay . This matt hates this , but this is like the hall light being left on when I was a kid . Yeah , it's a trauma .
Trauma is dramatic , but it's a sensitive topic .
Also looking at the camera , I'm realizing that my shirt like blends into the curtain .
It really does . I kind of like it . It looks like you're popping out of the curtain .
Yeah , it looks like a like a roasted head and an arm your arm's not burnt no , like I said , only neck up all right , just a hat update us on how's 32 feeling 32 feels uh , exactly like 31 felt , which is how 30 felt birthdays are not a momentous occasion in my life .
I don't think , okay , um , yeah , that that's all I got , wasn't uh anything too crazy ?
you didn't like the celebration I planned for you , the card your child made you any of the .
The card was great . Uh , her , she , she made a card and then also she went to Target with her grandparents and they got me a card . That was really sweet . It like makes me emotional when I read it , but I wish I could remember it off the top of my head and I could share it . That was good , it was fun .
We went out on a boat this weekend for my birthday .
I got over my fear . You did you piloted a boat , I faced a giant fear for you yep , yep , you .
Yeah , I think you mildly faced that fear because you booked the boat pretty last minute , but um , it worked out .
Right , yeah , okay .
But it worked and you did a great job . Did you have fun , did you ?
have fun captaining the ship . No , no , I don't like being in charge .
Oh Gotcha , you looked like you were having fun though .
Good yeah , I was happy to be there , no .
Oh , okay , okay .
I , when I tell you it gives me such anxiety and not much , does Like there aren't very many things I really don't get worked up about much , but there are a handful of things that the the voice in my head is so incredibly loud Like I have heart palpitations the entire time , like it's very , very stressful for me .
It's hard for me to like get in the moment and have fun because I'm very Well , that's too bad Stressed . Yeah , I mean I enjoyed being out on the lake .
I was going to say we were rocking a just a slow pontoon .
So which I think also kind of it was just Was that worse yeah ?
Okay .
Yeah , okay , yeah .
I didn't know if it'd be better that your pontoon maxed out at like 20 .
20 . Or worse . No , it was kind , I thought it would make it better .
But you didn't feel like you could get out of situations , is that ? No , Like I wasn't really worried about much in terms of like running into something because , it was a like older pontoon that went 20 miles an hour right topped out right right , right right , um , but no , like going through the main channel and stuff .
I was just like I can't really get out of the way of anybody Like I can but I have to really be watching , because there's going to be no last minute maneuvering in this thing , cause it is going literally like we were like a turtle compared to everything else on the lake .
Other faster pontoons are going around us .
And we could get up to a better speed , like if we were on smooth water and we were running bottomed out for a while . We could get up , and you know up into the upper 20s like 30 35 . I know it was fun , yeah yeah , it was 115 horse out . It was a beautiful day yeah , um , and we were kid free , which was um nice a fun little afternoon .
Yeah , yeah , it was good . And then I went to a concert .
Yeah .
And that was fun .
Well , Tate McRae .
Yep , I love her . She's so cool . She's very talented . Girl can sing , girl can dance . It was very entertaining . Show was great . Friends that I went with were great Good .
Good time , yeah , good show was great , friends that I went with were great good good time .
Yeah , good times were hard . You were popular there . Oh gosh , why do you say that ?
no , jc just said you . Uh , you made a few appearances I have not like .
I feel like I haven't had somebody say hi to me in public in a minute and yeah , the concert I made friends man . Good it was fun , got to take some pictures .
Love that .
Meet people , chat with them a little bit Awesome . The most embarrassing thing that happened was the first time it happened . These girls walked up to me and we were sitting and we'd just gotten done taking a picture as a group like of our friends . And they walked up and I thought what they said to me , which everybody else clearly heard them other than me .
I thought they said do you want us to take a picture for you ? And I was like , oh no , we got it . And that's what I said back . And then JC looked at me and was like , yes , she will . And I was like , what ? And she goes , they want to take a picture with you . And I was like , oh my God , I'm so sorry , oh my gosh .
I said I thought you were asking like if we needed a picture , because their faces , when I responded like that , were like , like they were like , oh okay , and I was like , what did I just say ? Like I was like , oh no , what did I do ? What did I do ? Anyway so if that was you , I'm really sorry , anyway , so if that was you , I'm really sorry .
Thanks for listening .
If it is you , I just can't hear very well , I've had a really hard time . I don't have like I can hear really soft noises . That's not the issue .
You have decent hearing .
Yeah , I have a really hard time when there's a lot of noise all at once to like distinguish the different noises .
This is not going to help people who think you have adhd .
This is gonna this is gonna put more ammo in there , in there but I don't understand how that would be an adhd thing it's an audio processing issue , same thing with why you have to use subtitles .
Now , I don't think it means that you have adhd .
I really don't think you do , but that is a thing literally got served like two videos this week about people who can't hear without subtitles I really don't think I have adhd though no , I know , I don't think you do either I don't think I exhibit , but then everybody's always like I think you're neurodivergent , I think you have these things and I really just
think for the most part I was raised around a lot of neurodivergent people , but maybe I don't know .
I know it's a spectrum I think you get overstimulated by sound like , but that isn't . I think that is your one . Uh , again , I don't think it's a you're , you know , but I think that is something that you're wired for is you get overwhelmed by sound ?
it's just when multiple things are happening at once yes , for me .
I identify that if I have three sounds going at once , like I like two , two sounds at once yeah like I can do my air my AirPods transparent while watching something , not a problem . But then if , like , two people are talking to me at the same time and I have something going in my AirPods , then it's an issue .
Yeah , that's crazy .
Yeah , but two things is fine .
That's weird , I think .
Okay .
Like I really I think that's abnormal . I don't think it's that weird that when two people are talking to me at once that I'm like whoa , whoa , whoa , I'm not processing that well . Like I don't think that's this huge red flag .
No , I don't think it's a red flag either . I was just saying I do think audio like stimulation is a lot for you .
I don't know if I agree with that . Okay , I'm being defensive .
I know you are . Maybe , but I've just seen you get very overstimulated by mainly our kids , who just like to yell because they're kids .
I don't think the yelling bothers me as much as the interruption .
Oh Fair .
Like my frustration , I think most of the time isn't from the yelling , it's from I am trying so hard to just get this done and if you give me 90 seconds , I can play animal doctor with you , that's fair . Yeah , they aren't the most patient Um which makes sense , like they're three in one , you know .
Absolutely no . I'm not like I don't know what's wrong with them .
I'm just like , yeah , they do that . If you're sitting just like on your phone vibing while it's happening , then I get real pissed . But I don't think it has anything to do with the volume or the audio .
I think it has to do with , you know , the lack of awareness by the guy who can hear 13 voices , watch a show and a podcast at the same time and be unbothered .
Yeah , the lack of awareness by the guy who can hear 13 voices , watch a show and a podcast at the same time and be unbothered ? Well , I can't do all three of them , but I can do a couple of them at a time .
But not check in when I'm trying to finish a task .
Half the time they don't want me . Like if I was like , I'll play animal doctor . She's like no , mom Doesn't matter , she needs to be animal doctor .
She's like no , mom Doesn't matter , she needs to be the doctor . You could still step in . I get it . I get it . Anyway , we're hashing it out today .
Yeah , it's good , it's good .
Are you almost done with your tangy orange ? Let's get into Greg's reads . Greg's reads Reads of the week . Reads of the week . Reads of the week . Just do an out of box for everything . Yeah , I know greg is my dad .
He's a wonderful man who likes to read a heck of a lot of news and he likes to send us articles , and what we do on this podcast is we read those headlines and we let you know , on a scale of zero to five , how much anxiety that headline gave us when it came through our inbox . Go ahead , matt , take it away .
Scale of zero to five , how much anxiety that headline gave us when it came through our inbox . Go ahead , matt take it away .
Here's why everyone in america seems to have more money than you . It may not be what you think zero out of five .
I have no doubt that the answer is debt or just like it , just looks like it yeah you're just looking at like your own individual insecurities . Yeah , like one out of five I think that is like such a big issue with the world now is because we take in so many people's lives .
It's the same thing with wedding photography and , like the reason I left wedding photography is people would come to a board with like 25 moments from 25 different weddings and they would take the top picture from all 25 weddings and then they want all 25 of those . You know , and I feel like that is our current state with social media .
We're taking in so many lifestyles that we assume everybody has all you . You know , like we'll watch 25 different people . They all have something cool that we want , but it's all different and then we assume everybody has all of them . Does that make sense ?
yeah okay , well , it's like debt , yeah or making lifestyle sacrifices or trade-offs like they value something more than you do yeah , that makes sense we travel , but we don't do restaurant , whatever it is , yeah well , I say that a lot when people ask me how I read so much , because something that I get or they may have a side hustle .
I guess that's another one yeah , people often when I post about reading are like how are you reading so much ? Like are you just reading all day and one ? I'm a very fast reader .
Like Flex . Just kidding , I was just kidding , you got so mad at that .
Because that's not what I'm trying to . Oh , you didn't tell us which one that was . What is it ? Orange pineapple ? Ew , I don't know how I feel about that . Oh , you don't tell us which one that was . What is it Orange pineapple ? Ew , I don't know how I feel about that . Oh , you don't .
I'm not a big pineapple fan .
Oh Well , anyway , I read quickly and then , oh , that's not looking like a good sign .
It's not gentle on the pineapple , it's pineapple forward . Let me try the pineapple leaps out of the can . It tastes like pineapple juice .
Yeah , I don't like that one as much if you like pineapple juice , though , look into orange pineapple because it is .
It is like pineapple juice and honestly I don't really even taste the vodka so much in it could , because it's my second one .
But I think it's because the pineapple is really doing a number anyway , all I was saying is I prioritize reading over other hobbies , like I don't watch a lot of tv . I don't know , you have to drink that , are you gonna ?
drink the whole pineapple . Okay , that's fine . You know what ? That's a good plan .
I'll just I'll slam this bad boy oh no , don't do that like you don't have to drink it . I said that like I don't leave unfinished drinks all the time I was gonna say it was just a gut reaction and it was wrong .
I apologize for my it's okay , but I respect it and I will , uh , you do not have to drink that , okay ?
well , on that note , let's go ahead and go to the next greg's read . They're so cold , what do you ? You ?
were . So the ice . The ice was doing a great job . Retirees want to keep your money .
Make a tax plan five out of five , while also simultaneously zero out of five well , yeah , because if I spend any time , thinking about it like a five out of five , um , but when I see it , I'm immediately like no zero out of five it's all the triggers .
Well , here he literally says right after yes , I know three out of four triggers , but if I could go back and re-educate myself on one thing for retirement would be no , to have a tax plan , for example , I would have done everything . Roth or backdoor Roth , I would have saved 24% on taxes . So that didn't help at all .
Just talking about how that just accentuates it for me . Yeah , it's a 4 to 5 out of 5 if you really look at it , or you go pass and then you just move right past it .
That's what I do . Yeah , pass and then you just move right past . That's what I do . Yeah , not always , I like the gardening ones .
No one more , oh , one more . Sorry , I'm overwhelmed by how cold this beverage is . You want , you want to know something funny ?
I , uh , I put salt in the ice to , like , make it even colder you were worried they weren't gonna get cold enough yeah , well , I didn't do it really far ahead of time and so I I was like I don't know that I want to drink warm sunny d vodka that's fair beverages . I didn't prepare well no , and so uh , yeah , all right .
Number three , gen x is the most stressed generation alive , and studies reveal what that's the end of the you think ? They reveal why .
Do you really think that that's true ?
It's done via survey , so I don't know , Like they probably Maybe . I don't know it's tricky .
I think it's because they're getting to retirement .
Their kids are young millennials or old gen z's and they're getting to retirement age which I think is like the biggest factor , and that's what a lot of it is talking about why is that stressful ?
If they don't have enough for retirement or they don't feel comfortable in their retirement , especially with inflation , and so I take I don't feel that bad yeah they got to buy houses in , like the early 2000s .
They have assets . They have assets . The market's been nothing but good for them , their entire investing career for them . Why , oh eight ?
yeah , there was a couple couple real blips in there .
For sure some downturns , which is expected and part of the normal cycle but like and honestly as a young person , you should be hoping for them so in their biggest years , like their biggest years would be like 10 to now yeah , it's been a killer other than , I guess , 2020 yeah , which that recovered , I think actually within like seven weeks or something crazy .
Like that was very short term I don't know .
Anyway , I don't know how I feel about that yeah , I mean , it doesn't stress me out um , I like the gen x people though . Yeah , I really do . But I'm surprised to hear that . But maybe that's why we don't hear from them very much . Maybe they're just so anxious .
Yeah , yeah , I think there's just a different set . I think young people are stressed . It's just also . I think the younger generations are also like what are you going to do , right ? Like they're just like we're going to live our life and we're going to have debt and we're never going to own anything , and that's , I guess , what it is .
And we're going to figure it out over time .
Yeah .
Whereas they are like in the latter half of their life . That makes sense , so yeah .
I hate that for our generation .
That that's the if you think that's really the thought process taking a laissez-faire attitude I just think that's stressful yeah and so I , like I don't wish that upon anybody I realize that it's necessary for a lot of people but yeah , I think it's um , you know , you know it's the procrastination , just kicking the can down the road .
I get that . That resonates with me on a spiritual level .
Word of the week . Word of the week .
All right , let's get you a word of the week , let's teach you some language .
I live for a word of the week .
Really .
Yeah , I usery this week . Then I had to define it for everybody that was there yeah because everybody was like um what ?
are you saying ?
wrong and I was like not wrong , look dictionary I'm brilliant , wow . So you got to flex on people no , then I had to admit that you taught me that word this week and I just was trying to use it and they asked what other words I learned and I said akimbo .
Tried and true word .
It stuck with me .
You familiar with the word locust .
Like the animal , no . Or the bug , I mean no , that's a locust . Oh , Locust . No no .
Focus with an L .
No , I am not familiar . It is in fact not the bug .
No .
No T , no bug .
The scene of any event or action , especially the place of a meeting venue . So like the focus it is kind of like the word focus or the set of all points or lines that satisfy or are determined by specific conditions .
So like what's the locus ?
Yeah , I think usually it's like something is the locus of whatever what's the locus of the I can't .
That's never going to get used . I hate that word .
Yeah , yeah , I just found it and it really popped yeah , no , I mean it pops .
I've definitely never heard it . I don't know that that's better or not , I think if I say that , people are going to be like no , there were no bugs there sure I'm looking for a nice usage of it here and it's taking you that long , which tells me that no , they just .
They gave a very long paragraph and then they highlighted where it was and I didn't find the highlight for a minute . In the shadow of all those upheavals , quito , which is something that this article is talking about has become an unexpected locus for a group of architects who argue , perhaps unsurprisingly , for added transparency , community and sustainability .
That sounds pretentious as hell .
Yeah , it sounds like maybe the article is .
I don't think that's for me . I think that's for people much better than me .
And that's okay . You guys keep locusts . You can use it like a hotspot . It looks good on you , yeah , like it's the locusts of anyway . Okay , you might have to explain it .
Crystal Bridges is the locusts of the Northwest Arkansas art scene .
Yeah , of the Northwest .
Arkansas art scene . Yeah , yeah , that worked , thank you .
I do see that . Yeah , if you use some of these words of the week , they're better to know when you read .
I think I think people , if I say that , are going to think I'm calling Crystal Bridges an insect . I really do Like . I really think people will not know .
Totally fair , totally fair .
I think that we should hit text . This week we have yeah , people have been really texting us , which is great text .
It's an awesome like . I really like the system , mainly because we get like notifications and if there's something that we should be prepping for , oh yeah , we have a . We have a lot of unread texts . Here we are , let's go , let's hit them all right , all right , oh oh , this is a longer one just so you guys know .
I think this is a good time to let y'all uh in on this . There is a character limit , so if you write something too long , it'll just cut off uh , this is a long one though , so apparently it's not like they'll let you .
They'll let you text some stuff I'm a single nurse in my 20s and just trying to live life the most .
I can you have to start completely over ? The first word you said made didn't . What it sounded like to me was I'm here in my 20s .
See auditory process . I'm a single nurse in my 20s . I'm just trying to live the most .
What the amount ? The first time you said that I did not .
Okay , do you want to read the text ?
no , no , it was so clear that time , just like it made me laugh , how far off . My guess . I thought was like maybe I heard it perfectly and I'm just being dense . And then you said it and I was like , nope , okay , so sorry .
Go ahead . I'm a single nurse in my 20s and just trying to live the most life I can right now and love all your recommendations to do so too . I do have a question that's a little more serious , though . A dear loved one of mine , also in their 20s , was just diagnosed with an autoimmune disease . That is pretty life-altering .
I'm wondering what your best advice would be in supporting them in navigating this new life while grieving the old and what could have been , when there's not anything I can do to change or cure this disease .
We're long-distance best friends and I check in often and have been working to visit more and text and call to talk about other things in the sense to live life as normal as possible .
Do you have any other recommendations for me ? Thanks , I think just being in an available space , yeah , as somebody who has not experienced that , I think always being in an available space for people is the absolute best thing that you can do . So a listening ear , not being afraid to check in occasionally too .
Yeah , I mean , I think there's a really good balance between operating without changing a lot , so as to keep some sense of normalcy , and then also doing some check ins , because , on one hand , you definitely one of the best things you can do is operate normally and let that person define their limitations , rather than trying to impose them , and let that person
define their limitations rather than trying to impose them Now there are situations , obviously , where it's like , okay , if that person tries to take on too much , you can take some part in trying to build healthy boundaries .
But if that person is okay , setting healthy boundaries with you and maybe that's the discussion to have is like , hey , I want you to put boundaries out there if we're doing something that is too much or if you need something else , but we're going to operate .
I agree with that . I think . Proceed as normal and let them educate you on where they're , because I think that's the thing I've heard from most of my friends that are in situations where their health has taken a hit or a big shift is they're like well , people don't ask me anymore because they assume I'm going to say no .
And they're like , even though , yes , I probably would say no about that . Often they say I just wish they would allow me to be the one to say no .
Well , I think that's the , you know , like the parent thing where , um , a lot of times new parents are the first people to have kids in a group of friends are like , yeah , we're going to turn down invites , but it would be nice to be invited Again .
There are extremes where it's like , well , they haven't accepted an invite in a year and a half , so it gets kind of redundant , but it is . There's very much a it's important to let people feel a sense of normalcy and then also set their own boundaries .
I have a really good friend who has one hand and I've learned over time , just I assume he can do anything and then if he can't , he's like , hey , yeah , I can't do that . Like I can't button the top button of my shirt , I can play golf , which is a sport you wouldn't necessarily think with one hand is the most doable . But yeah , he's got that .
We play video games together with , like , he's got a normal controller . It's not anything . Accessibility wise , he's better than me which doesn't feel great Much better . And he's the nicest guy in the world . So he's always like oh no , you did good too . And I'm like I have two hands , like why do my two hands not work as well as your one hand ?
But yeah , so yeah , I think that's you're doing a good job checking in , you're doing a good job like thinking about it . Just let that person set boundaries .
And also make sure they feel comfortable setting boundaries .
I that person set boundaries and also make sure they feel comfortable setting boundaries . I agree , create a comfortable environment .
Yeah , I think we did good . That felt good off the off the dome all right .
Matt's like damn we're really good sometimes . Sometimes we answer a question .
I'm like get a drink and a half and matt and he's like oh God , are we the best advice givers that have ever existed ?
All right , pineapples down , let's go ahead and break into orange strawberry . This should be sponsored so badly .
Why . Just think of the all the airspace that this has gotten Matt , we're nobody , I guess . If you keep up your TikTok game , though .
I don't know yeah .
Sunny D could be calling .
You want to try orange strawberry ?
Sure .
It's okay .
Oh .
I'm offended by the smell of it . Oh , that's a hard no for me , an absolute over my dead body . No , and I love strawberry . Yeah , the strawberry taste isn't bad , but the smell , I will agree . The smell something about the orange strawberry smell offensive like it smells a little bit like a diaper to me yeah , it's , that's what I was thinking like .
That's terrible taste is fine , but the smell really gets you when it put it like I don't know my stomach , I would have put this as probably like number one or two on my expected I think the orange is really the only one they should be putting out the orange is great , the pineapple , if you like pineapple , I think is really good , and this , uh , the orange
strawberry needs work , just in the aroma department oh , oh , can you get it further away from me ?
you can't possibly still smell it yeah , but it's the looking at it kind of freaking me out , okay anyway this is somebody texting us about inside out too , where on we is one of the emotions and we used it , as is one of the emotions and we used it as a word of the week . I really want to go see Inside Out 2 .
That's actually something I wanted to do this week .
So not a question , but they were just commenting that ennui was used .
And so they . We love an applicable word of the week . We really do .
Yeah , hey , it's Emily . I've written to you in emails , but decided to try messaging , since you guys said you were sad that no one was using it .
well , people are using it now you guys have showed up . We appreciate . It's awesome . It's a very good system .
I think I have a burning question . Do you know who chapel roan , aka the midwest princess , is ? Thoughts , comments , opinions .
It's not , please listen . That's where we're .
She's from where we're from yeah , it's an hour drive , we're not from willard , but , like she's , from the area that we're from yeah which is crazy .
Uh , the music video for hot to go , apparently , is in springfield oh , that's funny I haven't watched it . Jc was just talking about it this weekend , though she's like I was like there's where I grew up , there's where I worked after college , there's blah , blah , blah . So so now we should go watch it .
We really should watch it , and then Pink Pony Club I was telling you guys , this is about a club in WeHo that I went with Albert to while I was out there which it's a very famous club , like it's not if people have gone out in WeHo , you've probably been there . But that was weird too .
I was like , oh wow , I like feel like I really know what's going on here . But yeah , we know who chapel ron is we do I think I'm gonna go see her when she's here . Maybe we have a friend who got seats oh cool who . She said she had an extra ticket and I was like , oh , can I go with you ?
But she didn't invite me , like I don't think that she has a problem taking me . But I was like , make sure I'm who you want to take before I , like , insert myself on your extra ticket .
So we'll see you're on the short list though .
I'm on the short list but I did not get tickets . I literally like people fight for tickets and queues and stuff my worst nightmare . I would rather pay . No , I hate it that it gives me so much anxiety . People are like oh yeah , I fought over this and that and I was on the computer .
I'm like nope yeah , if they were like tickets release at midnight , you'd be like I'd rather wait in line .
I missed that by three days .
I wonder if they still have any and they don't yeah , but like that's you , yeah , yeah , you're not the I'm not a sold out show , girly .
My sister's really good though , so she usually gets me tickets to the sold out shows . Got it , she's . She'll sit in a queue . I'll wait in line Like I would go .
Yeah , I would go do that .
That's not a problem .
Like a time traveler .
A bunch of people did that for .
Chapel .
Roan and for Post Malone , because they were afraid that they wouldn't make it in the queue , and so they went as soon as the box office opened to get them in person .
Yeah , I suppose there's probably a certain amount that are physically yeah .
Yeah , brilliant .
Yeah , especially I wish I had postie tickets . Yeah , yeah , brilliant . Yeah , especially in the day where I wish I had postie tickets .
Yeah , I'm really jealous . Caroline got postie tickets . Anybody know , anybody I'm like , can you get us some postie tickets ? That's funny , I'll pay for them .
Sure , sure , I know , yeah , you're not looking for them for free .
No , I'm not looking for anything free . I will happily pay for them you're just like , I don't I don't show up on time to get things that are highly exclusive .
No , I'm like yeah I'm like those people definitely wanted it more like good for you , yeah , I can think of things that you knew were releasing , that you just like , didn't set alarms for or just checked out on yeah , I'm like you know what ? It wasn't meant for me like they didn't stock enough for people like me .
That was like taylor sweat eras , when everybody was like I was like I would love to go . Like that sounds like the concert of the century . And then everybody was like , oh yeah , I was in , I'm like I'm out like I had uh three computers up , like yeah constantly refreshing . I'm like , I am out .
Yeah , I wrote my own custom bot to try and buy tickets . You're like , never mind , yeah , I'm good .
Like I just I can't jump through that many hoops to be a fan of anyone . Yeah , like I'm cheering for you . Good job , taylor . For sure . Good job Posty , good job Chapel . I'm really proud of all of y'all we love to support the artists .
We're just not the first ones to do it .
No .
Yeah , this is just a text telling this . You know that the crime that we would commit to stop a crime forever , they said , littering , which is a really savvy move . That's a really good one Also like not that destructive of a thing if you do it just once .
Yeah , that's really good , that's a really heads up , heads up look at me over here saying kicking puppies .
Yeah , my mind's broken yeah , that's brilliant , you know it's good to stop that , though yeah , but it would hurt me yeah , I mean not as much as the dog , but no I'll never stop saying that after your video of the billion dollars .
That , yes , one of our most viral videos of all time . Me talking about how it would hurt me to hate you with a car .
Yeah , which was not even the question . He , like , upped the violence tenfold and then talked about how it would hurt him .
Yeah , yep , that's you know me , that's my thing . Violent , yeah , all right , another one . I have a 10 month old and I'm sure , as you know , it's a constant battle managing sleep with little ones . Just wondering what your hot take on sleep training is and if y'all sleep trained your babies no , hot , take on it .
I don't think sleep training is crazy , um I really don't , as long as it's done within um reasonable yeah means um as long as the safety of everybody involved is . We did not sleep train , but that's just like we just have had good sleepers .
Like our youngest doesn't even like to be held when he goes into his room to go to bed no , he's turned into this like at his bedtime .
He just gets kind of like upset and then you pack him up ready to go to sleep and he will push off you to get into his bed yeah , he doesn't want to be rocked , he doesn't want to be comforted .
No , no singing songs , he's like , put me to sleep , no snuggles like he just wants to be laid down he gets mad until you put the sleep sack on him and then he's like all right , it's happening yeah , he's like let's rock and roll game time he'll put his hands behind his head and he's out .
I forgot about that .
Yeah , he puts his head .
He literally , as you carry him to his room , puts his hands behind his head as though he's laying down in your arms .
Yeah .
And so all that to say we don't have good advice , there's nothing we did to make it that way we just have good sleepers and she was a good sleeper , but she was definitely not as easy to put down he is yeah , we had more of a routine with her . Yes , yeah and it's yeah .
We we have not had to do sleep training where it's like you know , don't go in there for 45 minutes , or whatever it is .
I don't think anyone goes that long . I don't know . It's like 10 minutes . Is it 10 minutes ? Like it's not ? Yeah , I don't know we ever had to push it . We haven't had to go through . That is yeah point .
But there is a point where they do have to learn to self-soothe a little bit and um , our , our kids have been fairly adaptable to it so but sleep training like . The important thing is , if you're not getting sleep , you're not showing up your best as a parent either .
I agree with that .
And so it's really important that you also balance your own well-being , because being absolutely beaten down is not going to put you in a state to be the best parent you can be the rest of the day , and so make sure you prioritize yourself , like that is something that really can go by the wayside if you have a tough sleeper and all my friends who have sleep
trained for the most part have had awesome experiences . So I think anything done within reason yes , yeah , they also have a non-serious question . Would you rather always have wet socks or always have popcorn kernel teeth , or popcorn kernels stuck in your teeth ?
I think a popcorn kernel .
You think so ?
Yeah , because I literally can't think of something worse than my feet being wet all the time .
There is technically a well you know what . Actually , there's probably a health issue with both of these , but constantly having wet socks would just give you trench foot , which is what they got in , like World War I in the trenches and your feet like rot and fall apart .
It's really not good for you , I'm assuming , not from a health perspective , but also having like a kernel stuck in your teeth would probably like create an abscess or an infection . So so having like a kernel stuck in your teeth would probably like create an abscess or an infection .
So neither one of these are good things health wise , but assuming there's no health issues , Wet socks in bed .
Matt Wet socks in the shower . Wet socks to go swimming .
Yeah , that is tough . I just I know if I had a kernel in my teeth wet socks in your shoes . Wet socks in your boots I would just constantly be like I think you'd get used to it I think you would get used to either one you , you would .
There is no way you cannot gaslight me . I'm going to make you wear wet socks for a full day and tell me when you get used to it Like .
Yeah .
I'm going to have like tons of pairs soaked and ready and like you have to change them every hour so that they're sopping wet all the time .
If we do that , we need to video it .
Okay , because that's a real , that's a real content miss if we don't do that .
I just think you're wrong like wet socks .
Yeah , like a colonel's not good , it's terrible I'm not arguing that , but wet socks on your furniture , wet socks like over concrete , wet socks through mulch yeah , you go to to the DMV and your feet are just dripping .
Yeah , it's not great . It's probably got to be kernels , You're not wrong . Terrible Also for someone who's starting from ground zero . What are a few steps you'd suggest for someone who wants to do content creation as a job ? Thinking , lifestyle , family , cooking ?
Consistency . Yeah , that's the number one thing is you have to show up consistently . It doesn't mean you have to show up like I feel , like a lot of people are , like you need to show up three times a day , seven days a week , blah , blah , blah , blah .
Um , and coming from somebody that is not consistent in this season and it has majorly impacted , like my views and my uh reach and things like that , I think that that's the main reason I've also I feel like not been , as my content has not had the same quality that it once had either , like there are multiple reasons , but I think consistency is the number one
thing . And so , if you think what you're capable of showing up with is posting once a week , start there . If it's two times a week , start there , but really stick with it . Um , it's consistency .
Yeah , and have a point of view , have like understand what you're bringing to the table and what your value is , um , and know that you'll get better .
Yeah , like I think a lot of people think they watch other people and it looks so easy because it's not like a physical feat , it's not something that requires specialized education or anything like that , but it's a skill and it takes a long time to learn how to talk to a camera .
It takes a lot of time to learn how to edit , filming light , things like that . There are a lot of pieces to the puzzle that I feel not everybody has .
uh and I've watched somebody do it for years and I'm still not that good at like a lot of it yeah , well it .
It takes a lot of skills , so give yourself grace too , and that like it's going to take consistency and learning how to do it , also like it's a new skill yeah and absolutely go for it .
Anybody that's telling you it's too saturated , there's not room in the market , there's not this , there's not that , whatever your perspective , like everybody , has a unique perspective and story to tell , and so I think there's just as much opportunity for you as there is anybody else and you should go for it , and also the people that make fun of you .
Like , if that's a concern , maybe it's not to you , maybe you have all wonderful supportive people in your life , but I think the thing I hear over and over again from people who are wanting to get into it and I hear it from people talking to me all the time they'll be like oh well , so-and-so , they're like a wannabe influencer .
Well , they post like they're an influencer . Like people will be talking to me and saying that about someone and I'm like that's awesome . That's where everyone starts .
Like , no one that has made it is going to be critical of you in that , because anybody who has made it into like the influencer sphere had to start somewhere too , and you showing up consistently and sharing your life in that way is a huge feat in and of itself , regardless of what the follower number is or the performances or if they are doing that .
It's just gatekeeping like yeah , if somebody's made it it might just be mean yeah , they're just not very nice , and I've never talked with anybody like I haven't had that experience .
I'm just saying like if you do have that experience that somebody who's you know trying to shut the gate behind them .
Yeah , they had to start there also everybody I know in the content world , like anybody you've ever seen me make a video with anybody I've ever been around I think would cheer for somebody just starting . I can't think of anyone that wouldn't , and so know that that's few and far between yeah , hey , matt and joe .
I'm a mom to a three-year-old and I'm due to have another baby girl next month . What was your biggest tip from going one to two ? Kind of nervous but super excited .
I feel like we had a really smooth transition . We did . I think the biggest tip is just be prepared for a little bit of chaos for a minute .
Yeah .
Expectations low and don't expect too much out of yourself and take lots of pictures and enjoy it . Mean like that really is . My advice is like all of it is fleeting , and I think that's my advice to any parent that's about to embark on a season that they know is going to be a little harder . Is it's fleeting , it's it's short .
The good stuff and the bad stuff , like ask for help where you can and the bad stuff , like ask for help where you can .
You've got it . Yeah , I don't know , I guess I mean we have a three-year-old now .
Um , I think it would just be having conversations with her , you know , just making sure that , talking to them about what they're feeling and experiencing , and you know I think it would be easier well , I mean , I think your communication is so much better , so it's , I mean , it's highly dependent on who your three-year-old is and how they handle like new
competition for attention . Like there'd be a lot of aspects that I know our three-year-old would be like hey , like baby's cool , but like I'm over here , yeah , I think it in ways that would be an easier gap because there is more helpful hands . Oh yeah , you can absolutely . I mean , I think , as much as you can include them .
Right .
Try and include them .
A friend was talking about this last night . She's about to have her third and she has two that are a little bit older . Like they're both independent , they can make some of their own meals . Not that they are , but like if they wake up first in the morning they can get themselves breakfast or like a snack or you know whatever .
Turn the TV on stuff like that .
And she's about to have her third and she was saying to her husband I guess she was like man , I cannot believe I'm about to do this again where , like this baby's not going to be able to get their own snack , like I made it to this independent phase and I'm going to go back , and what her husband said to her is but you've never had hands before , you've
never been in that season with little kids that could go grab the snack or , you know , help in that way and so I thought that was really cool advice too , because there are obviously things that will be hard about it .
thought that was really cool advice too , because there are obviously things that will be hard about it , but it's a completely new experience every time , because the different , like having kids already , etc , etc .
It just all changes the dynamics and there are always pros and cons well and kids love to help and be involved I agree and so , as long as you can be patient and be okay with , like you know , a three-year-old doing stuff wrong or not understanding what you need , like , including them will help them . It will help you .
And then , yeah , just lean on your community and do your best . Yeah , I agree Like it's going to be chaotic , but it's going to be really good .
I agree , congratulations . Yeah , I agree .
Like it's going to be chaotic , but it's going to be really good , I agree , congratulations . Yeah , excited , all right , this one's short and sweet , what has been the best phase of your life so far .
Ooh , that's a great question .
Good question .
Um , I mean I , I know the right answers , my kids , I mean I know the right answer is my kids Like .
I know that that's like . Politically correct Can't go wrong being like my kids and a mom , but I really , I think that I really had a high through our engagement and like planning my bachelorette and that season with my friends .
I really look back fondly on that , Like I really loved that time like 2018 , 19 , when we were building the house .
Yeah , and we went to Italy .
It was just a very selfish season and I Miss that . I enjoyed it greatly . Yeah , I don't know that I miss it . Sure , like I don't know that , I would say I miss it greatly . Yeah , I don't know that I miss it . Sure , like I don't know that I would say I miss it . But I look back on it fondly like I'm really happy where I am right now and .
I actually feel like I'm finally kind of settling back into a really good spot where I feel good and like excited every day again and I definitely in the last couple of years have struggled with postpartum depression and just juggling a lot of things , like I've been doing a lot of things and none of them that well , and I feel like I'm coming out of that a
little bit , which is really refreshing . But I look back and I see myself in those years I was doing a lot less things than I was doing the things I was taking part in really , really well and I felt really proud .
I think I have the same time period . Honestly what 27 , 28 , 29 for me I guess it would be , which unfortunately does line up right before we had kids and I'm I love being a dad Like it is phenomenal outside of that that has made things complicated .
Like our kids are awesome being parents feels really intuitive most of the time , and then sometimes it is like very difficult and annoying well and like , if I look at all the aspects individually that have been going on .
I have like renovating the house was awesome , the kids have been awesome , like I mean , there were parts of renovating the house that were not awesome , don't get me wrong yeah but , like when I look at all the different individual things we've been able to do , I'm really grateful for all of them . I just think we bit off more than we could chew at once .
Yeah , we didn't need to do them all at one time yeah and that's where , like I think we've always talked about , we could do two out of three Right , like we could have family stuff and kids and renovate and do content .
We could do two or three of those at a time Doing all four of them at a time is a little bit too full of a plate and so , but yeah , I think back to those times where it was really not complicated , like we were busy , but it was all us and it was , you know , we could bite off as much as we wanted to chew and for the most part we could chew it
, and so I think that's part we were still taking on a ton yeah it was just yeah but it was just , it was just us , and so it was like okay , if we slow down , it's just us yeah whereas now we have a lot more moving parts but I'm excited about the seasons that are coming up , like I feel like oh yeah it is .
I have loved little kids a lot . I don't feel like you have the same sentiment . I don't think that you don't love them sure but like I don't think you're a newborn baby , no guy like and I think that's a lot of people . I talk to a lot of moms that are that way .
I love it like I'm like Rory's , just getting to the point where you're having a lot of fun .
I'm getting into it , yeah uh , and so that , I think , is interesting too , because I think when we're both in a good spot , everything gets a heck of a lot easier for both of us , for sure , for sure .
Yeah , honestly , right now it's kind of funny we talk about that One of the struggles I have right now is like I'm engaging more with Rory , our son , who's a year and a half , pretty close to anyway , and I feel like I have a gap because I haven't engaged as much when he was smaller and so with G it was different because she was the only one and so it
was like I was there and I was the only option , but I've deferred way too much to her the three-year-old , you know , two and a half year old , um , when he was little , and so he's he's way more in with mom , because mom has been into the phase that he's been in and I'm like , okay , I'll go do lunch with you know the toddler kind of deal , and so like
I have more of a rapport to build with him and that's been like , oh , okay , yeah , you have to you're seeing the impact ? yeah , you have to show up when they're nine months old for them to , at a year and a half , be like hey , that guy , and he's still great .
Yeah , he still likes his dad but yes if we're talking about who's number one , it's mom yeah and it's not close but I think that they were both kind of that way at that age yeah , I mean , mom is just a big part of their life .
Early just I feel like I had more well and more of a feel for her when she was that age , you were working true and so she was with me all day yeah , but I think I was more novel to her then too . Yeah .
It was like more of an event when dad was home . Yeah . I agree Now dad's home and just not as engaged with him .
Yeah , I agree .
Which is ? I mean , that's a personal shortfall , not like what is my baby doing .
No , I'm not taking it that way . What's wrong with this guy ?
Yeah , it doesn't look like no , but I am like noticing that a little bit , which is , again , there's a lot of reasons for it . It doesn't upset me .
I'm just like , oh okay , gotta , gotta show up well , and I I had this conversation with somebody recently talking about how you put so much pressure or I don't know , you probably don't .
I think this is a mom thing you put so much pressure on you to like , cultivate and create this really magical childhood for your children and I keep forgetting how little they are .
Like I'm like I need to fit it all in , they need to have magic , but I'm like they're little , like we have a lot of time to establish , you know um daily rituals that stick with them for life , and not not that we can push it aside , not that we can kick the can down , but like I don't need to feel like a failure of what I have accomplished so far
not being enough , like I still have more years to continue to cultivate and create those things for them and especially like at his age , everything's magic right like .
Especially like at his age . Everything's magic Right , like the dishwasher popping open when the cycle's done . That's magic to him . Like the world is mind blowing Right , and so it's all like you can do something incredible . And I don't think they have a frame of reference for like . Oh , that was spectacular compared to like I saw a bird today .
And that also blew my mind , like they don't have a frame of reference for scale Right , so I don't know if that makes you feel better or worse , but I don't know . Deep thoughts . One more Sunny deep thoughts .
One more question .
One more question . All right , long time listener , but I was afraid of recording my voice and so the text feels a lot less scary . My fiance and I are getting married in September . We're currently planning out our budget and monthly expenses . My fiance's budget is salary , but I'm hourly , so my income depends on how much I work .
We plan to save 20% of our income , but we're wondering if you had any advice for budgeting well and sticking to a budget .
How do you all budget and what tips do you have for newlyweds ? I feel like I'm the worst to ask budgeting questions for , because I reverse budget yeah , which is like not uh , it's a privilege to be able to budget how I budget , so I budget our savings , not our . Also , we're not big spenders no , so I think that also aids in this as well .
Um , I budget our savings , not our spending . So what I mean by that is I have tracked , like our bottom line , like what is our minimum out each month , and I know what that number is . So let's say like utilities your rent your utilities , your insurance , your all those is a thousand dollars a month , which I know is not like a great deal I would .
I would hammer that yeah , so I know that I need to have a thousand dollars a month set aside to be toward those like main expenses . That's the first number I figure out .
Then from there I only budget my savings yeah um , and then anything left over I spent freely yeah , that is , I think , a perspective where , if you do have enough income that you're able to have like disposable income and you're trying to figure out where to allocate that , that's where determining what your savings goals are is going to help you more than .
How much do we like , what percentage we put here and here .
It's like if you meet your savings goals , then you can talk about where you want to prioritize well , and I just don't do a like if my number one , it's kind of like what we talked about earlier with priorities . People are different . Some people are not trying to save , they're trying to save something , don't get me wrong .
But like saving now is way more important to me than going on the vacation while the kids are little , just because that's my priority right now and so like , does that make sense ?
like I have a tendency like to just say no , we can't do anything else because yeah , you're very much long-term perspective yeah , yes , so some people are like we're gonna live and do this now also with the hourly and , like a , if you have a varying income from an hourly , I would do all of your budgeting off of what your minimum is .
So if you , on average , work 40 hours a week , but sometimes it's lower , I would do all your budgeting off of 30 hours a week or whatever , it is sure . Um .
And then the weeks that you work more than that , toss that money that went over into savings or toward debt or you know um or build it up for a fund of like we're gonna do a vacation or I'm gonna do some purchase that you're looking forward to , exactly like it depends on what you know , yeah , but I think that that's always good , because then your lifestyle
is set for what you're looking forward to , exactly Like it depends on what you know , yeah , but I think that that's always good , because then your lifestyle is set for what you're guaranteed to make and the rest is bonus , rather than feeling stressed when you don't get the hours . Yeah , I don't know .
Yeah , that is the right way to structure it , for sure . Advice for newlyweds it's always communication , but if you don't live together , that's the hardest part .
It's like learning to live together , learning different people's routines , determining how to like actually cohabitate is the biggest part , and we give this advice .
We've given this advice a hundred times on this podcast , but I think having a weekly meeting like a set guaranteed time that you talk about that stuff and you come to the table prepared to constructively talk to each other about issues you're experiencing . Living together ?
um is night and day and don't be afraid to table an issue , like if something gets really elevated , do your best to try and like , table it and come back to it when maybe emotions aren't as high , because you're you're going to stand a way better chance of reaching a resolution if you can take the elevated , like defensive feelings out of things and don't take
that as we do that perfectly . No , we do none of that perfectly , but we do it sometimes .
Sometimes we just get really angry um and and we blow up and we get frustrated each other back and forth and freak out until somebody's so mad .
You know like we also do that I just it's so important to me when we're talking about relationships and marriage that we're so transparent about that because , I mean , we also I feel like we do a lot of really good communicating I really do , we really try out it , but like we have , we both have spaces where communicating is not our strength and that we're
both really sensitive , I mean like anybody . Yeah , I think yeah , like my like , I'm not well tuned to my emotions and so I can't always provide good , strong dialogue in the moment of what I'm experiencing .
And I'm an external processor ? Yes , and so I have to , which is Matt's nightmare .
She's an external processor and I'm way too defensive , and so , as she says things that she doesn't totally mean but are mainly just like a 45% concocted thought in her brain , I'm putting ideas out there .
Yeah , she's like slowly building to a thought as she goes and says things that offend me because I'm easily offendable I'm like , well , not true , nope , not how that happened . Nope , don't say that that's not okay . And like , well , not true , nope , not how that happened . Nope , don't say that that's not okay .
And like she's like this isn't even what I'm thinking , I'm just getting there and yeah , so we have that somewhat regularly .
Which I totally . It makes sense to me why that's so hard . I'm like that's fair .
Yeah . It's not always like , why are you doing that ? It's like okay , but like you know me , like can we just get past that and do the thing ?
Can I get to where I'm going Because I'm not doing a good job , but anyway . I always think that's a really good thing for us to say to you , because I think , to some point , I think the main thing you want to look out for is are you guys both always working toward the same main goal ?
Yeah because even when we really blow up and are frustrated with each other , I have always been confident that we are working toward the same main goal yeah , we're .
We're always on the same team . Now somebody might be in an absolute somebody , being me often like in a bad mental space or a self-destructive space , and so like you may not be saying the same things or feeling the same things , but usually your intention for where you're headed as a couple or a family or whatever are in alignment , or hopefully are .
And if they're not , that's what you got to work on I agree , I completely agree well , good luck I drank .
How feel , feel this , let's , let's have matt okay , so this is a 12 ounce can uh-huh , how much do you think I drank ?
I mean a solid three and a half ounces that's what I was gonna say .
Three , I think three and a half was generous .
Yeah , I was being nice , I was going to say three . I think three and a half was generous .
Yeah , I was being nice , I was trying to get you close to a third . Yeah , I didn't . I don't think it is .
Maybe if they filled it , overfilled it , it'd be a third .
I prefer my water .
That's good . I should probably drink some water after this .
Well , on that note , we love you guys .
Cheers .
Bye .