I won't let my body.
I'll be outwait everything that I'm made don't won't spend my life trying to change.
I'm learning to love who I am. I you, I'm strong, I feel free, I know every part of me. It's beautiful.
And then will always out way if you feel it.
But yours in here. She'll some love to the food. Why there, say go day and did you and die out way? Happy Saturday, Outweigh.
I'm Leanne Ellington, and I'm a friend of Amy's and the author and creator of Stressle Seating. And something cool that Amy thought of and asked me to do was to come be the resident guest host for the next five episodes of Outweigh, starting with today, where we're going to be diving into the topic of why your brain thinks it wants sugar. But before we dive into that, I wanted to just give you an idea of the wide array of topics we will be covering for the
next few weeks. Because this whole conversation around food and our bodies and our health, well it's definitely this three
dimensional subject matter. So over the coming weeks, we're going to cover lots of different aspects of this topic, things like is social media helping or harming your self esteem and your relationship with food in your body, why you stopped trusting yourself and how to earn back your own trust, why weekend self sabotage is a thing and what to do about it, and how to know if you're using food and exercise as a tool or.
As a weapon.
So those are just some of the things we'll be covering coming up on outweigh. But in the meantime, let's dive into today's topic, which is why your brain thinks it wants sugar. So what I'll be sharing with you today was really the missing link for me when I was healing from my own disordered eating and self image and body image struggles. It was the part of me who genuinely thought that I had an addiction to food and sugar, and the part of my journey that definitely
carried the most shame. So, for those of you who don't know me, my struggle with food and my body started when I was taken to weight watchers at eight years old, and I carried it with me into adulthood, at one point reaching nearly two hundred and fifty pounds. So I just want you to know that wherever you feel like you are right now, I've been in my own food and body prison as well, so you know this.
Isn't just me spewing information at you.
I struggled and suffered with food and my body for decades, and that's why, really I'm so passionate about helping women and men. But people that are at war with food and their bodies just really rewire their brains to start a new conversation that leads to peace of mind and freedom.
Because here's the thing.
I learned, the same eat less, move more equation that I'm assuming a lot of you listening learned. And even though yes, I did technically lose a lot of weight, like, yes, I got there. I lost one hundred pounds, I got down to my lowest weight, and I could finally.
Wear sleeveless haltertops any day of the week.
But I never addressed my addiction like poll to food and sugar. So I still felt like I was a slave to dieting or a slave to exercise, because I would bounce from one extreme to the other, like I would diet and restrict until I couldn't take it anymore, and then the opposite, you know, carefree, abandonment, eating whatever I could get my hands on, and then feeling guilty or trying to out exercise my overeating. So I was the opposite of free. I was also the opposite of happy.
I mean, you would think that after I lost a third of my body weight, I would feel beautiful and happy and free and all the things that I thought I would feel. But because I didn't address the self image and body image and the wiring in my brain that was causing me to think and act and feel and behave like I was fat or unworthy, or a failure or destined to stay this way forever, or whatever
painful words I was using to myself. Yes, I lost the weight, but I brought all of my old habits, thinking, and behaviors with me, and so eventually I realized that I was never going to be able to outdiet, outwork or outsmart the wiring in my brain and in my self image, and that I was always going to end up right back in alignment with the story I was telling myself about myself, because the old food and body conversations that I had learned were what was weighing me
down and perpetuating the problem. And that's what I now call the weight of the weight, because the weight on my body wasn't the real weight, right. It was all this other stuff that I was carrying around in my head and my heart that was really weighing me down. And so, coming back to today's topic, even after I lost all that weight, I still felt so out of control of sugar and food and I carried around so much shame around it because I truly thought I was an addict or something.
But I also didn't talk about it because I was so ashamed.
I thought it meant that I was messed up or broken or something to be ashamed of, like it was my dirty little secret, right, And that's because I didn't know what I'm here to share with you today. I didn't know that my brain was just doing what it
got programmed to do. So let's talk about that, okay, Because for me, once I understood why I did what I did and why I felt this drug like poll to food and sugar when I was bored, sad, lonely, or stressed, that is when I finally understood that I wasn't crazy and I wasn't weak willed, and I wasn't truly an addict. My brain just got fired and wired to repeat a really specific pattern that actually had nothing
to do with food or sugar. So before we get into that, first, I want to address this subject of self sabotage. Okay, because a I used to think that that is what I was doing and be. In the work that I do with women, this comes up most of the time for pretty much every woman I work with, and that's where I want to address self sabotage right out of the gate.
So self sabotage as.
We know it, it really is a myth because no one actively says, like I think I'm gonna actively sabotage myself right now. It doesn't really work that way, right what's happening to you is what I'm assuming was happening to me, and what was happening to all my clients. Because think about it, there's only so many times you can witness yourself committing to something or making a promise to yourself or making declarations like Okay, I'm really gonna cut out sugar this time, or Okay, this time it's
really gonna be different, and then not following through. Before you start to wonder if there's something wrong with you, or if you are legitimately a self sabotager or witnessing yourself giving in like you know, abandoning your plan, or feeding into moments of weakness where one moment you know you're feeling strong and the next minute you're halfway through a package of oreos before you start to wonder if you really are actively sabotaging yourself, like there must be
something wrong with you, because no matter what you do or what you try, your temptations always win, and discipline and willpower always lose.
So I used to think the same thing about myself.
I mean for years I thought I was self sabotaging until I learned what the real problem was. And the real problem was not in my mind, or it wasn't just in my mind, It was in my brain. And so here's where I want to introduce you to one of what I call the weight of the weights that I was telling you about earlier. And so it's the weight and of course I'm putting weight in air quotes,
but it's the weight of your triggers. And what I mean by that is it's the weight of all of the physical, mental, emotional stress that if it's not released or addressed or like attended to, it actually triggers your deepest, ingrained habits, as in, that's how your brain works. Like when you're physically, mentally or emotionally stressed, it actually triggers your oldest habits. So how do we stop that? That's a million dollar question, right, So let's talk about that.
So Amy gave me full permission to get a bit geeky with you, So we are going to get into a bit of brain science.
But I promise I won't let my inner geek stray too far.
Okay, So the way I explain it to my clients is that you actually have three brains that need to be taken care of and need to be fed.
So you have a physical, mental, and.
Social brain PMS. But the one I really want to talk about today is your social brain because that is the main brain that's housing emotional eating, stress eating, mindless eating, and all of the air quotes, you know, self sabotage that comes off the back of it.
And here's what I mean by that.
So a quick thing about the social brain or the ACC. It's actually called the anterior singulate cortex. But I just teach my clients to remember the three letters ACC which stands for acceptance, connection, and care. And that's because in order for your brain to feel safe, it needs connection,
it needs belonging, inclusion, and actual human connection. So either feeling accepted, connected and cared for by yourself or from yourself, or buy and from others, like feeling that from others And guys, this is not just a desire, it's a require. It's not a want, it's an actual need. And so here's what I mean. So I'm going to kind of describe the cause and effect cascade that's happening in your brain.
And you might not really know what's happening, but this is what I want you to really become aware of.
So when you go to reach for sugar, or let's be.
Honest, it's not always sugar, right, Like, sometimes it's wine or Netflix or mindless TV or online shopping or scrolling Instagram or you know, anything that numbs you out or distracts you or causes you to procrastinate. And trust me, we all have our own drug of choice and I've used them all right, there's no shame about it.
But when you're reaching for your drug of choice.
Your social brain your acc is actually looking for oxytocin. Okay, it's the love, comfort and emotional or psychologically safety hormone.
Right.
And here's the thing, like we talked about, your social brain will get it because it's a it's a require, not a desire. But it's a matter of what you feed your brain. Because here's what's also happening. And again, this is that cycle that I mentioned that's happening without you knowing it. So, like we said, your brain requires connection oxytocin, right, the safety love connection hormone that we
talked about. Instead, though in those moments, we feed ourselves food, mindless TV, mindless web scrolling, pulse of shopping, other you know, activities that numb, distract or comfort. So in turn, instead of giving our brains what it really needs, which is oxytocin, we're giving it endless amounts of the high. Right, like the drug, the dopamine serotonin payoff is what it's getting.
But what we're truly desiring is connection oxytocin. Right.
And in turn, that social brain is hungry for oxytocin because it's still not getting it. It's getting so much dopamine, but it's still not getting oxytocin. So essentially we are feeding you know, loneliness and sadness and stress and boredom with that kind of like fake connection like food TV, other drugs of choice. So in turn, we are staying over fed, but we're undernourished. Right, So let me see that again. We are overfed with dopamine but undernourished with
what we really need, which is oxytocin. Right, And this is the vicious cycle that keeps happening over and over again.
Okay, And so here's the other thing.
Like if you're one of those people where if you're not on something, you're like really off of it, right, like off the rails, or if you're left to your own devices of overeating or binge eating or comfort eating or just filling a void of some sort with food. This is why, Okay, it's fired and wired in your brain. And that's why willpower or trying to outmotivate or white knuckle your way through it isn't working because it's never going to be solved with logic or reason because it's emotional.
Right, it's in your brain.
In fact, your brain is just doing what it's been programmed to do, which is require oxytocin and then expect to get that hit of dopamine in return.
But also, guys, like if.
You are taking care of everyone but you, and you always seem to be the last in line, and in turn you keep filling that void of your own needs with food or social media or Netflix or whatever your drug of choices, this contributes to that too, okay. But in reality, this is your brain just kind of, you know, lovingly screaming at you to feed at what it really needs.
And that's why you have to address the underlying reasons that you're numbing and distracting and procrastinating or just comforting, because that is the weight of the weight, right, And that is what I mean when I say that your brain thinks it wants sugar, but in reality, it doesn't want sugar.
It wants oxytocin.
Okay, but it's been programmed and fired and wired to get sugar, and it's been programmed to live in a state of being overfed but undernourished. And side note, I just want you know, for clarity's sake, to mention there are other reasons beyond the scope of this episode that your brain might physically be craving sugar, so you know, like.
Nutritional deficiencies and stuff like that.
But what I'm really talking about here, and what we're focusing in on today's episode, is that when it's not a physical need, and it's not physical hunger, it's this emotional hunger, like you're not hungry, right. But the point being, and the big thing I really want you to get is that if you have that voice in your head that's telling you that you're crazy or weak willed, or a sugar addict or a self sabotage whatever that voice is saying, I'm here to tell.
You that there is hope. Okay.
Your brain simply got fired and wired to experience yourself alongside food and sugar in a really specific pattern, and you can unwire and rewire that anytime you choose. Okay, so obviously, like, yes, that is a process and it's
a commitment. But I just want to let you know that if you do feel hopeless or like you're unhelpable, or maybe you're like I was, and you feel like you might actually be a sugar addict, I promise you that your brain is this mouldable, pliable, transformable thing, and there is hope.
And these are the kinds of things.
That nobody told me right, and I wish they'd did because it would have saved me decades of dead end roads and shame and suffering.
So that is it for today, Outweigh. I hope you got whatever you needed.
To hear today, and I hope this just opened your eyes to something that you weren't seeing. And if you liked what you heard today and you want to hear more about the process of rewiring your own brain, then head on over to Stresslessseeding dot com and you can sign up to watch the Stressless Eeding webinar, where I'll walk you through the exact five step game plan that my clients use to heal themselves from the all or nothing diet mentality for good, but you know, without restricting
themselves and punishing their bodies, and definitely without ever having to use words like Macro's low carb or calorie burns. So I've laid it all out for you in five easy steps over at Stresslessseeding dot com and if you liked today's episode, we will be back next week for more Outweigh, where we are going to talk about social media and if it's helping or harming your self esteem
and your relationship with food and your body. And I'm actually going to give you an actionable plan to help you shield your energy and protect and foster your own self esteem and body image. So join me next week on Outwaigh for More Goodness. So I'm Leah Ellington and I'll talk to you then