He's Just Not That Into You

So we're going to be dissecting a few topics, and of course we're going to share so some pretty embarrassing stories along the way. I thought we should first start off by addressing some signs that maybe he's just not that into you. I feel like, when you're twenty, you start your Google all these things, or why doesn't he like me? What should I do? So? If you're just opening up about her past Google, I feel like everyone

does it, though, Well, what are some of these signs? Well, I think a major one that I've learned along the way is if you're the one initiating all of the dates. Yeah, definitely been there, done that many times. It's the worst feeling because I feel like they initiate the first date and then you know, you have a few good dates, and then this always seems to happen to me. I'm then the one sort of setting up the dates and sort of having to be on their back about it.

I think that's quite common though. I've seen a lot of people and heard a lot of people talking about how they'll have this amazing date and then the guy will just basically ghost them or they will have to do all of the chasing. Do you guys think it's a power play in the early you know, in the start of a relationship, or is it just someone that's not into you. At the time I thought it was, I thought, oh, you know, this is just the normal back and forth, because it's happened quite a bit to me.

But now that I'm actually in a good relationship and that shit didn't go on at the start, I actually do think it's a sign that the person isn't into you, or that they've got other options and you're not very high up on those options. Yeah, that's the thing. If a man really likes you, he's got going to want to see you all the time. He's going to be wanting to come up with nice dates and things to do.

And at the time, if you do like someone, you do want to believe that there must be a reason that they're always busy, that you know, maybe they don't have any date ideas. It's a pretty obvious sign, you know, when they go like hours and hours without replying, because let's be honest, everyone's got their phone super glued to their hands. Yeah, what are the other signs? Well, I mean this seems pretty obvious, but maybe not when you're twenty.

That if he's not interested in things you do or like, and quite frankly, the only thing he's interested in his sex, it's a pretty big sign that he is only looking for one thing. What else have we got? Well, another major sign, and it does sound pretty obvious, is that he's never done anything nice for you whatsoever. Sometime my whole like four to five year relationship with my ex boyfriend, and I think it is hard when maybe you don't

feel great about yourself, you don't expect these things. I think as you grow older you do expect more out of our liationship and you just think someone meeting up with you is enough. Well, I'm going to put it out there. It's slightly embarrassing. But at thirty years of age, well actually I was twenty nine. I received my first and only ever Valentine's Day flowers from my now boyfriend. And that is despite having a boyfriend for five years. Yeah, yeah,

he didn't believe in Valentine's Day. I don't know, and it's just a dickhead. And you know, this guy also forgot my birthday and then pretty big one, and then he was in we were doing long distance at the time. He was in Melbourne, and then he decided that he would come over for my birthday party, which was the week after my birthday, and I chipped in for the

flights for him to come across. And he didn't bring me a birthday president and said, oh me coming across was your birthday present, then proceeded to ruin my birthday. Now I'm not party. He also never gave you a compliment? Did he like? Not one? But do you think that's what made you like him more? The fact that sometimes when you were together, he you know, when he was

slightly nice. It felt so good to get that reassurance or you know, or not in reassurance, but for him to actually be nice because he was so awful most of the time. Yeah, I suppose it's hard to reflect on because you know, it's sort of is pretty an indictment of you when you're talking about these things that

you used to put up with. But he was my first boyfriend, and this was coming off the back of, you know, not a great time at high school, confidence being pretty low, so it really was a case of yeah, I hadn't experienced anything different, so it was kind of like, oh, you know, I can change him, and you know, I'll get this tiny, little nice bit of him and then

it just gets taken away. So I think it was more of a toxic continuous Well that's the thing as well, because in our society, it seems quite unusual, especially when you're in your early twenties, for men to actually want to be in a relationship, and I think a lot of them display that kind of player behavior. So it does make you feel special when they've chosen to spend their time with you, and I feel you just get used to being treated that way because that's all you've

ever known. I suppose one big red flag that I picked up on was the fact that my ex boyfriend had such a reluctancy to call me his girlfriend, Like it literally took I don't even know what was it, like two years again, it's an indictmond on me. But and do you know what, I've noticed that on a lot of reality shows that some of these stunning people will go on and they'll say, oh, I've never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend before, and people look at

them like they're weird. But I feel like, because people are in that mindset where they just want to be players and not be not settled down, that it is rare to find a boyfriend that wants more. I think, as Leanne from Love Island put it, she's been in

lots of situationships, but not actual relationships. And it's so true because you can date these people for so long and there's just like no label, you know, you just go with the flow and you don't want to actually ask, Like it's such an awkward thing to be, like, oh, I think what we like boyfriend and girlfriend. It's almost like a proposal these day. Asking someone to be your Girlfriend's so funny because my now boyfriend brand and he didn't realize that he had to ask me to be

his girlfriend, like that's a thing. Hey, Well, I said to him, Well, we had the discussion of what we were, and he's like, oh, I automatically assumed that I was your boyfriend because he'd been hanging out for a few weeks. Look, that was shocking for me, because, yeah, your situation was different because you literally became boyfriend and girlfriend after the

first date, really, which is so unusual. It was after a few weeks, but that had been that came off the back of dating someone who for three months didn't want to call me their girlfriend or make any sort of title, and then he had some elaborate you know, brought me this bunch of flowers to ask me to be his girlfriend. So I don't know, I mean, in

your previous relationship. Yeah, but isn't I feel like it's just an excuse to talk to other girls, and without putting a label on it, to be fair, I think it's different if you've known the person, as in Sophie previously was sort of in a friend sort of she knew her boyfriend. Should we put it? Should we have we explained how Sophie met No, I don't think so so funny enough, Brandon used to be my intern when I was working at the Thunderbirds and he we've all

joke that Sophie's a cougar. So he's five years younger. He's four and a half. Oh oh my god, he is. Wait so you're wait, but you're turning thirty one and he's currently twenty six twenty six Yeah, his birthdays in October what so okay, sorry, four and a half years

younger anyway, So I was also premature straws anyway. Anyway, So yeah, when I was a comms manager the Thunderbired's Brandon was my intern, and he went on to get a full time job and then we moved actually and worked together full time for another what three years in total at yes, thirty six six eight was literally his work wife, and then Sophie his not wife. I had a different work husband. Yeah, but anyway, anyway, so yeah,

it's quite funny. So Brandon one day was like he saw Sophie at a Thunderbirds game and was like, Oh, your sister's hot, and like we're obviously because we're identical. I was like, this is a bit all good. I was like, yeah, anyway, So he literally from the moment he saw Sophie at the game had eyes only for her and did tell me that when he first saw me at the stadium that he fell in love with me. Then I'm glad. Can I just add it on? I thought it was love at first sight? Can I at him?

I'm highly offended because I met Brandon before Sophie as your sister, and we hung out and we actually had a lot in common, as in, we all love video stuff. I wasn't interested at all, but I love that. I love that. No, I was interested, but I wasn't interested at all. But you know, it worked out well that he was interested Sophie. He never said any of that

stuff about me. Well, I copped it so much at work because everyone just thinks it was so funny that, like, Brandon was working with me full time but then dating Sophie, And there were so many times when I had to be like, look, we're not dating he's dating my sister. I think from there, so you should explain your first

date with Brandon. And we've been talking for a few weeks, and it was kind of awkward because he had told Kate a lot about his ex girlfriend and he had been with this girl for four years and basically she kind of she dumped him over Facebook. Over Facebook, yep. I mean they were pretty young at the time, so there are girls out there that are obviously really mean

to boys as well. Yeah, so she led him on for a few months that you know, maybe she'd want to get back with him, and then she invited him to her house and to tell him that she had a new boyfriend. So but this was while she was like kind of dating him again. Well I'm not really. They've kind of been talking on and off anyway, and he backed that up by telling her that he was engaged. I told him that I don't think she ever would have believed that. Well, the best bit was this got

really crazy. So when Brandon and I were working together, we had to go down to the airport and there were some Thunderbirds international players that were arriving in Adelaide was like eight o'clock at night, so we had to film them arriving and interview them. And the funniest thing has happened. We're standing at the international gate and all of a sudden, Brandon's ex girlfriend is getting off a

flight from Europe, and Brandon's like oh my god. And at the same time, obviously, these two Thunderbirds players are walking off, so Brandon's trying to film and the ex girlfriend walks straight up and tries to hug him, and I was like, keep bolming, keep helming. So he has to shrug this girl off and she's probably thinking, oh, he's come to see me, like maybe he wants to

get back with me. And then the funniest thing was he then had to go talk because her parents are there, go talk to them, and then he came back over to me and my friend Adam, and as he's walking up, he puts his arm around my shoulder and goes, just don't do anything, keep walking. So he told them that I was his fiance. And it's so funny because we've got this like love hate brother sister relationship where like we don't touch it obviously at all, like we just

don't want it to be near each other. And I was like, get off me, and it was just it was just like a TV show, like you couldn't even come up with this shit. Well that night, we'd only been talking at this stage, and he messages me to say,

you're my fiance now. So we've had we had this on running joke that I was the girl, even though it was Kate who he'd been now like engaged to whatever, So if he already was a bit full on at that stage when we started speaking and anyway, he told me he was over in Bali, and I thought, oh, he's in Bali, you probably won't speak to me much. Spoke to me twenty four to seven and he told me that he had three tiers of dates that he

takes girls on. And it's pretty funny because we went to read these messages back on our anniversary and we were just both like cringing, So you have to scroll pack a fuck Fairwell, I was gonna say, I remember after like when you guys have been dating for a while, going out for a while. Literally his date was just like sitting and eating food in this room. Tears food, he did, What food is that? He did say there were three level levels of dates. I had to go

back to find them. He said, one was chilled. Then that's that is that like Netflix and chill? He said, Shield is like your average movie night, not bad? Is that what you do every minut And his second one is kind of like a dessert night and a nice walk and whatnot, and then the other what not so brand and the other one is the extravagant one that you have to see to believe. So did you go extravagant? Was other time you did the extravagant day? And are you?

Am I boring everyone shitless? So am I continuing on this? I think people want to hear what the extravagant date was or should we tell it? From our point of view? Yeah, maybe we should so. From Kate and my perspective, it was all a bit of fun, wasn't it, because we knew Brandon before and we just thought it was hilarious that they're actually going on a date together. The best bit was at our house that we were living at at the time. It was like, this really fancy house.

I have missed that so much, and it had one of those cameras out the front where you could see the person waiting at the door when they rang the doorbell. So Amy and I like sprinted over and we could and I've actually got it on my snapchat. We filmed Brandon at the door and then he was like, We're like, hello, come in, brother, And it's so funny because our house I look back at that snapchat was an absolute tip, Like

how embarrassing. Anyway, poor Brandon's come in and you know, Sophie and him have gone off, and we were, like, being immature as we were, we were like, oh, I want to find out like what they're doing, where they're going. So they started snapchatting us like a few little clues here and there. Anyway, so if you can tell us what actually happened, and then we'll follow up what happened

with us. It was pretty cute because apparently he'd taken his mom and dad and sister to scope out some of the locations and I think, is that just blows my mind? And then his mom and sister had a bit of a hand in helping him organize food anyway, so they cut up a bunch of fruit. Yeah. Anyway, I arrived in the car, and what's funny now is his car is an absolute shit tip, Like nowadays, I can't even get my I have to put my feet on like bottles and fucking rubbish. Anyway, his car was

immaculately clean. I hopped in the car and he handed me a golf ball and said, oh, you've got a guess where we're going. Oh, minigolf anyway, So he took me to mini golf, which ended up being closed, so he had to think quickly. He didn't think about that one through. He had to think quickly on his feet, so he went to mini golf at glenelg We then went for a little beach stroll and he had come up with some questions to ask one another, like anyway,

and he came up with questions and whipped them out. Wow, then it's like a love island. Then he asked me if I wanted to get ice cream down at Glenell, but we hadn't had dinner yet, so I'm like, I felt bad. I didn't want to spending all his money and I was like, no, no, that's fine. Anyway, Then we drive back. He heard that margarita pizza was my favorite food. We're going to picked up Margharita pizza. Can I just add I loved it. He had asked Kate what your favorite food was and it was pizza in

the teller. Oh, I forgot about that anyway. So then he drives up to this lookout area near his house and and he opened the back of his ute and he'd set up all these like pillows and blankets and chairs and like a little like kind of his laptop with movies on it. And then later and then he had an eski full of Natella which he bought a spoon because because there's a joke that I just eat

Natella like a peg with a spoon. You do anyway, And yeah, so that was pretty much the really cute date he took me on and he won me over with that. It gets more interesting. So we found out about said date and we've got a we've been sent a snapchat of the location. So Amy and my two cousins, my adult cousins, who are what six foot five and two, we decided that we were going to go see if we could do a drive by. And we also got my friend Adam, who's like six foot five in the car.

So we're in Little Master two. Just to put it in perspective, Adam is a father of three and has a wife and he skipped out on well he said his wife, he said, Joe was asleep, so he'll come and join us. So we picked him up. Anyway, the cars absolutely packed the brims and our cousin and was like, yeah, I know where that is anyway, So like, it was bloody miles away and we found them and so we were like, oh fuck, Like you know that moment, we were like, oh god, if they see us, they're going

to get so mad. So we yelled out something, can't even remember what. Then we drove off and but we snapped a photo. Anyway, they had no idea that we were there, and it only came out later that we'd been there. And it's just this on running joke. So to pay me back, I went on a date and they bloody all turned up and scoped out the restaurant until I walked out. It was so embarrassing. Oh I remember that down at Henley b Yeah, it was so good. And we got this amazing snapchat of you exiting the

date and everyone was laughing in the background. I don't even think you saw us though. The worst bit was I knew you'd do something like that. But you know, when you're late, you can feel like you're being watched, but you don't know where you are, sorry, where they are. We're talking about different levels of dates. I think we've all had dates that haven't gone too well. Kate, do you have well, okay, I know you have a few stories about those. Well, I've been a mug that thought,

you know, it's nice to put her on dinners. Actually I've got two. There was one guy that I invited over for dinner, and you guys actually helped like clean up the Christmas like we didn't have. It was I think it was like February and the Christmas tree was still up, both Christmas trees, but we had two Christmas trees. Anyway, So Amy and Sophie Conney, when I was at work, packed with the Christmas decorations, cleaned the whole house, made spaghetti, you know, really put an effort in and we and

so when I exited the house. Yeah, so they were over at Mum and Dad, so everyone knew that this dinner day was going on. The guy rocks up eats and then told me he had he rocked up late as well. Yeah, ropped up late, told me he had a movie on. So stayed for I think it was like forty five minutes, and then left and didn't even invite me to the movie that he was seeing with people that I knew. It is so rude. It was

so rude. And then another one was there was another guy and this was more perplexing because he taken me out on all these like quite decent dates to nice restaurants and movies and paid for the bill and all that. So I was like, oh, well, I'm gonna show that, you know, I'm putting in an effort and I'll make him dinner. So and isn't that what every guy wants? Yeah? So yeah, Amy, And so if you've got you know,

we're gonna leave the house. And they actually we went shopping, and I always get a bit embarrassed planning things, so like I felt awkward, you know, picking out the food. Anyway, the day of the date comes and I messaged him saying, oh, so what time are you coming? Oh? Sorry, I've got something on and I was just like I remember walking down and I was like, fuck, like this is bullshit. Like I was more like I didn't really care. It

was just more that I was embarrassed. That's right. It is embarrassing when you've told all your family or friends about this person and you do feel like such a mug. I think that's half the reason why you do do the You know, when you're not getting as many messages back, that's when you do start like it's you've got a bit of pressure on you because people know about it. So you're like, oh, I'm sure there's some sort of

misunderstanding why they're not replying. It's not because they're not interested. Well, back to first dates, who do you guys think should pay? Like, do you think you should split the bill or do you think the guy should pay or do you think initiated the date should pay. I'm like, we're obviously all feminists, but I think there is something kind of romantic still about a man offering to pay for you. At the same time, I feel like you should, as a woman,

offer to pay half. But there should be one offer to pay half, and that should be shot down. Yeah, I think, I mean it does, as you said, depend who initiated the date. But you know, I think just you know said that chivalry is still alive. I think the guy should say no, I'll get it. The girl should say oh no, are you sure, and then they go yeah, And then I think it's fair that in

a second or third date you should pay for something. Well, even if you go to the movies, if he pays, then you pay for the popcorn or drinks or something. When you're actually in a serious relationship. I think that's totally different. I think that, you know, for me, I like to be equal in my relationships, and I don't expect rees to buy all my dinners and stuff like that would just be ridiculous. Yeah, that's the thing. It's the start of a relationship when someone's trying to woo

you and win you over. What about when a girl might earn more than a boy, Do you think that it's different then that she should pay. I don't feel it's different, but I feel like if you earn a lot more money than someone, perhaps don't be suggesting to go to like four course meals and you know, maybe go somewhere that was not of course, sorry, somewhere that's like within their budget. I think it definitely depends on

the lifestyle people are used to. So I think if you're like loaded and your partner's not, I think that you should sort of let them dictate the dates as well. And then if you want to do something particularly nice and you're the one earning more than I think it would be okay to pay pay the way for that date. Do you know what, though, when I think of first dates, it just takes me back to you know, being in your early twenties and going on like those cringe coffee

dates cheatoyah, And I remember going out. I went on a few dates with this prison guard of all occupations, and the date didn't cont you know, so we went for a coffee date. We then went to the movies, and then it went back to the coffee date. What yeah, you went back to coffee. No, I'm saying like the first day was didn't progress And yeah, it didn't progress

at all. Yeah, And you know when you're kind of like, oh, I feel like this is a first date situation where you get to know someone and know if you want to spend any more money or have you ever heard of those people who they'll do so many elaborate dates, And I think it's because they've got nothing to talk about that they needed to be doing something. I think if you can have coffee or multiple dinners with somebody and you've got heaps to talk about, I think that's

a good sign that this relationship is going somewhere. Yeah. Well, one of the points I came across for someone not being into you was someone not making an effort. I suppose that comes into dates as well. And I remember you were particularly pulled off Amy when I think it was a second or third date and the guy rocked up to your house in great tracks with pants my most hated of tracks of pants. Yes, this particular person

also didn't like chocolate. They like cheese better, so I'd put on a cheese board and they rocked up in track pants. So I wasn't very impressed. I don't think there was a third date after that. I think even if you're like, it's nice for people to feel comfortable around you, but I don't really think you should be rocking up to someone's house in tracksuit pants. Date three, Well,

that's a good question. What are some deal breakers for everyone? Well, you know, from past relationship, it seems like I didn't really have any. But you know, now that I've got a bit more respect for myself, cheating would get a deal breaker. Well, I got broken up with because one guy's deal breaker was it he liked to argue in a relationship. So I don't even going out with you have been good at that. Yeah, I know he should

have waited to get to know me. I've only been going out for three weeks, and like we caught up most nights during those three weeks, he was pretty flown. And how many texts was moment? Like three thousand text messages or something or something crazy anyway, or what period for three weeks? Three weeks? Anyway, I don't think it

was that many, but it was a fair few. And anyway, so he told me that his mum was ten years older than his dad and that, you know, I got the vibe that he likes a woman to tell him what to do. And anyway, I was heading over to his house for dinner and to watch a movie, but I thought I felt like something was up, Like you know, when you met the person isn't messaging back as much. Yeah, anyway, I get there, and you know, when you've got the vibe that someone doesn't even want you there he was

hanging up his washing on the line, and yeah. So then he just stands at the kitchen bench while I'm sitting on the table and tells me, oh, you're sorry, Oh sorry, I was sitting on the lounge. Anyway. He starts a conversation by telling me after three weeks that he can't see himself marrying me and that I'm not argumentative and he loves to have a fiery relationship where he argues with his girlfriend, and I mean, I thought, well, I don't really have much to argue with you about.

But then it turned out that his ex girlfriend also worked in the newsroom. We were out at that time, and she was a very fiery character and told him to break up with me, so that there was a bit more to that story. But maybe he was trying to like initiate a fight and seeing your reaction, like if you'd been like, fuck you, I wonder stay with me, I tell brand in that story. Now he's like, God, he should have got to know you a bit longer. I know. That's the funny thing when Savi, because I

was in Melbourne at the time. I'm dealing in my own drama, and when Sabby reign, I was like, did you even know you? It's quite funny. It's funny now to laugh. It wasn't funny at the time. Well, it is interesting the vibes that you can actually be putting across that you don't realize. Because when I started going out with Dale, he actually thought I think it's called nagging.

That's what he told me. It's where you it's where you give like you don't really give that person very much, and it's like sort of it's kind of like you ghost them a bit, but it makes you, you know, treat me and keep him keen. Remember Amy going on a first date with Dale and Kate had Dale as if you had gotten Kate had left, what did you You were on a date with someone else, And I was like, oh, yeah, Amy's going in a day. I've got the house myself. I invited Brandon over and we're

going to make dinner. Anyway, you you lost it because you didn't want us to like see you leaving for your first date and like the clothes that you picked out, like you were very get So if he's such a bitch, look just I don't know what. Everyone has been in each other's business the whole. But to be fair, that happened with me. I had to go down on a date and I was like, yeah, that's so mean. The reaction every was like, oh, where are you galleying? You're

such a because you rocked up on my first day. Yeah, I know. Anyway, moving on, This wasn't on the first date, but we've had a few dates and I remember we went to play mini golf and he felt like the hot spot in that later a bit of me, and he just assumed that we were hanging out for dinner, but I had plans with you guys and my cousins, and he thought that was me trying to blow him off and pulled him around and it was so awkward. Yeah, well, I didn't know what to do anyway. To be honest,

you are quite hard to read sometimes. Well, I think it made him really like me. So girls, there's a tip out there. Act a bit cold. But the thing is he sort of kind of he'd been messaging me a lot, and then he kind of on the messaging, so I was like, oh shit. So I messaged him and asked if he wanted to catch up because it was his birthday. And I remember, Kate, you were like, for fuck, stake, Amy, don't let this slip out of

your hands. You need to do a nice gesture. So I ended up making him this enormous chocolate cake, and I got him a little present. I got him a sushi maker, so we made sushi at his house, and I think that's when he realized that he really really liked me. And that's when I got an invite to his friend's birthday. So I feel like, I feel like you need to sort of be cool but then not

too cool that they just don't. Yeah, you've got to You've got to be willing to put your feelings on the line and make yet I feel like, it's not like you have to be like I really like you. You just have to do a probably gesture. Yeah, you just have to do some gestures which show you actually care. Well. We should probably also talk about a few red flags, because in my first relationship there were some massive red

flags that I didn't really take much notice of. The first was probably my ex boyfriend's twenty first birthday, and that was a memorable night that is still being spoken about to this very day. I've got vision of it if you would go off on YouTube, if I could be bothered to upload it. Now. What should have been the first red flag for me? He was wearing a top hat with a monocle and had arranged to be riding in a horse and cart with his friends. What is his wedding when he didn't ask me to be

in the horse and cart with his friends? First red flag? The second would be that he invited girls that he had been with previously to the party. Second red flag. The third red flag was that he got increasingly drunk throughout the night, where he couldn't really even hold a sentence, and this was the first time my parents were meeting his parents. It then got increasingly worse. So it came to the twenty first speeches, and I had a little

feeling that they weren't going to be so great. He was worried that his friends were going to tell some embarrassing stories. So you know, there's like a ding ding ding, like the speeches are on, and they wheel his grandmother up in a wheelchair, so she's nice and close to hear the speeches, right near the speaker, that's right. So they unfolded by the friends revealing his nickname was Anaconda. Another new nickname. I hadn't heard of. Wood's fish fingers.

We can all use our agitation there. They then proceeded to point out girls in the crowd that he slept we had the wheel one revealed that he had sex in a rubbish bit, revealed that he had slept with two girls whilst we were dating at the time. That was a fun one to find out as well in front of your parents. And then they also said that he really has a thing for girls called Sophie because he used to date another girl called Sophie to individual,

you know, point you out in the crowd too. And the evening ended with our mother being called a milk and me having to take him home with his own mother and to lie him down on his single bed and undress him from his tuxedo. I think you should clear it up that your ex boyfriend didn't call mother milf, just his friends did. Oh yes, I had to explain to mum what a milk meant. I think she was secretly wrapped. And to top it off, this twenty first

birth that cost his family ten thousand dollars. He was serious. Yeah, alcohol, he'd drank, but anyone in earth. So it was. It was a memorable night, and the worst thing was me being a nice girlfriend and a mug. I felt really sorry for him instead of being angry, and I went home the next day and wrote a twenty first speech about all the lovely things he had achieved and how lovely he was. Wow. Yeah, well, I've got mug written across my face because I've got another red flag that

I wanted to bring up, which is your boyfriend. Sorry, the guy that you're dating treating his mum like shit. So the guy that I was with, his mum was lovely and she basically did everything for him. And you know, he was I think like twenty eight at the time, and I'd moved across to Melbourne to live with him, and we used to go to his family's house about once every Sunday or you know, every weekend for dinner.

He would get there and act like a child and sit on the couch or his mum fussed over him. Isn't that so unattractive when people get at clay children in front of them. Oh, and it was like she got so I found this funny. So she would pull him that she'd make tea and then she would like wait to get it to the perfect temperature, like putting cold water and you know, just making sure it was light, did the tea bag pass it over? And I'm like, oh my god, I'm like, I can do my own

tea anyway. So maybe she did that for your tea. She did it for me too, Yeah, And no, he did. And I remember one particular night and she, you know, slaved over and you know, made the meals that they'd requested, and she was working, starting on the dishes, which no one helped it with and except me, I think I offered. And then they're watching some crap on TV and you know, the mom's knocking the pants around. They go, would you

shut up? And I was like, oh my god. And then there was always in this other instance where we were going to Noosa and and his mom had to come over and help him pack and she was like, He's like, oh, have I got everything I need? You? You've got your stockies, you've got your ducks, you've got your this, you got you this. And I'm like, what

the fuck do you know what? I feel like some moms do such a disservice to their sons because you might think that that's really nice for them to have done that when they're growing up, but it ruins them for when they're in a relationship. Like I must say, I think Dale had to do a lot for himself growing up. His mum was obviously lovely, but she taught him how to do things for himself, and he's so

good about, you know, ironing and cooking. It's those guys that you don't want to end up with, the ones that their mom's done everything. I think It's also their dads too, because Reese's dad is like a maze and his mum. He's both got beautiful parents. And his dad does a lot of the cooking because he loves it, and I like, Reese's picked up on that and is so good around the house. So it does, it does make a difference. My ex boyfriends mum would iron things

perfectly when we went overseas. She literally ironed every bit of clothing and somehow folded it up in a way so that it stayed like no perfect iron. His underpins, yea, his jobs tee towels, white ones. So do you know what just reminded me of? You know, we're talking about mothers and their sons. Remember Amy Schumer stand up bit and she's like, you get those mothers that are like two over the top and they're like, oh, I wanted

to fuck my own son. I don't know if they those mums were that kind of mum, but no, you definitely hear about them, the ones with the new girlfriend's never good enough. Well, theory I've heard is that it ends up that you actually want your son to date someone like you that has the same sort of qualities as you. Moving on to another red flag. This one emerged you know again in this past hideous relationship. Boys

then compliment girls in front of you. So I was out at the SB having dinner and my boyfriend at the time decided to tell me that the bartender behind the bar was a eleven out of ten? How would anyone think that that was accepted? But then proceeded in front of our work colleagues to give me a four and a half out of ten? What like this was prior? Like this was all you know, where the half come from? It was the same individual. I have to tell this

story because it's actually hilarious. I remember, I don't know how this came about. But so when Kate was going out with this person, this guy actually lived at his workplace, so they had a bedroom for him to stay in. And when he left to go to Melbourne that some of the staff got left to sort of pack up his room and they discovered a polaroid that they I had it, not that it was given to me, but it was amongst some stuff that I had been given, like this book of alls, and it kind of like

fell out of the pages. And let's just say this polaroid was a picture of him with his dick in his hand. Well that's real vintage though, like you know, that's before mobile phones. Well, the most hilarious thing was is that when Kate was moving out of recently, like we've been broken up what like three and a half years. So Kate had been nice and kept this box of his stuff and I don't think he'd ever had that thing where you handed stuff back because he's still in Melbourne.

And so I remember Kate was moving out recently and we found the box and the Polaroid was still in there, and I was like, oh my god. And I remember, just because that's a bit of a shitster, I stuck it on the fridge and I had this hilarious magnet that I got on holiday that's of a nice cream cone, and I put it over his private part and I remember I said to I literally just put it up to see if Kate noticed that it was on the fridge. And then I said to her cousin, Oh, could you

go even pick up that magnet for me? And he was like, aha, yeah, the said polaroid has now been destroyed and thrown out all the rest of his crap that I held onto, But I never I never received my beautiful bedspread back, and I'm still pissed off about that. Do you sometimes think when people do that whole breakup thing and they hand stuff back, do you think sometimes it's psychological warfare what people put in the box. I was definitely a big fuck you. I've actually never been

given anything back that I gave anyone. I actually sold a necklace on marketplace is a future necklace that I got, which was very out of charage to let me say, because as I said, he forgot my birthday several times or didn't give me a gift. Do you know what's hilarious? Because my boyfriend's been engaged before, and when he moved in with me, he came with all this beautiful, like beautiful pots and pans and stuff, and I was like, what are they ease from? And he's like, from our

engagement party, but we never used them. I was like, oh, that's all right. My ex boyfriend gave me nothing of worth the cell. I remember one Christmas, he's like, oh, you will not believe what mum's got you. You won't believe it. I've been hearing about it. Leave it. I opened up this small little package and it's this chicken do you have? Can you put it on the story And the only thing that was kind of cute about it was that his mum collected them, so she wanted

me to start my own collection. But why would he find that so interesting? I have no maybe sentimental. I got a great Christmas present from said dickhead ex boyfriend. It was so thoughtful. He handed over a bag which had a car. It was I think I had a some wrapping paper in a card that was meant to do with a bracelet his mum had bought me and he didn't even wrap it in the paper. The car that they're being provided that's currently on sale a marketplace too,

if anyone wants really. Yeah, yeah, had a few my ex boyfriend the last birthday we celebrated together and then he dumped me, like about a week and a half later. He bought you That was after your holiday in Thailand. Yeah, that was after my birthday anyway. He bought you guys a waffle machine which he wrapped, and then he bought me to teacups which were not wrapped, and a very cold card with a cown talking about funny things boys?

Do I remember? Dale had me over to his house and I think he's meant to be impressing me by cooking me dinner, which was very sweet. And I remember he made sort of handmade pizzas. They were on a a bot pizza. You know, he did make it. He made the own topping, that's right. And it was so hilarious because he's like, no, no, I'll sit and make the stuff. And he had me watching him. And first thing he did, he cracked an egg onto the peach is to cook and I was like, oh my god,

what on the tomato? Yeah, like like that was the last thing. He cracked the egg over it because he really loves egg. Now. She was quite yummy. And then it's Whenny he brought the pizzas out and he just got these scissors and just starts cutting the pizzas up as if it was so normals. Yeah, with kitchen scissors. And I was like, this is so funny. This is like Bachelor Pad style living. Wow. God, I think we

could go on all afternoon. Geez. I feel so bad because there's someone that wrote in to say that they a mal teaser every time we mentioned our boyfriends, So I'm sorry you would have gone through about twenty packets. They are good among teasers. We're just giving them what

they want. Yeah, yeah, well yeah, if you have enjoyed today's episode, we'd love you to send in some of your own dating questions and we probably will do a follow up episode of what it's actually like once you've secured the boyfriend and then the reality of living with them. But also we're contemplating whether we should get our boyfriends on the show for their point of view, because we'll put a poll up on the Instagram page as to

whether our boyfriend should appear on the show. There might be a lot of rivalry going on to get them on. I was gonna say it would also be great if people could share some of their dating stories with us, and perhaps we could share them anonymously on the show. Yeah, and obviously, as you've heard, we're not dating experts, but you know, we have had a lot of shoe day, So if anyone wants any of our opinion on it or how to trick a boy into being in a relationship.

And if you did enjoy today's episode with mother, if you could share on your Insta story, but just tag us out Outspoken, Underscore, the under Stork podcast. We're also on Facebook by the same name, and we're going to be bringing up some funk holes and questions and that kind of thing, so you should definitely follow us in there.