6 Small Changes You Can Make Immediately To Have a Big Impact On Your Mental Wellbeing

Jay Sheety Ja Shetty Jet. Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose. I am so grateful to be back with you for another session, and I want to say thank you to all of you who are showing all your love, showing up, being present, learning, growing, sharing the episodes, leaving reviews. It means the world to me right now. Thank you so much, Thank you so so much from the bottom of my heart. And like I always do, say, if you do see me somewhere, come say hey, A lot

of you did it at the airport yesterday. I've been traveling around a bit right now, and I loved bumping into so many of you that I saw in Orlando and then Chicago on my way to New York and it's been a real, real joy. Thank you so much for all the love you show me and that you

show on purpose. Now it's mental health Awareness month. May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and I feel it's so so important that we use this as an opportunity to deepen our connection with our mental health, to help the people around us, to use it as an opportunity to

do better for ourselves and for others. And I'm so grateful because I'm partnering up and an ambassador for NAMI, which is the National Alliance on Mental Illness and they're the largest grassroots mental health organization in the United States. ARMY helps provide advocacy, education, support, and public awareness so that all individuals and families affected by mental health conditions can lead better lives. And if you are someone you know is struggling with men mental health, there is help.

Call NARMI Helpline at eight hundred nine to fifty Army, or go to www Dot NARMI dot org, forward slash help, or text Helpline to sixty two six forty for immediate twenty four to seven crisis support call or text nine eight eight, or visit www. Dot nine eight eight Lifeline dot Org. I'm so grateful to be partnering with Nami, and I really do hope that it helps get the message out to so many more people about what they

can do. Now, I wanted to share with you my favorite habits for my mental health that I think are powerful, practical, and accessible. I'm not going to go and ask you to learn a new skill. I'm not gonna go and ask you to learn how to do something new. These are things anyone can start today. And so if you're someone who's been struggling with anxiety and stress, this episode is for you. If you're someone who's been trying to do so many practices but they're not working for you,

this episode is for you. And if you're someone who knows someone who's struggling, this episode is for you. It maybe a child, a partner, a friend, someone you love, a family member, a parent. Check out this episode. It's lots of great, simple insights in the small changes that will make a big difference. Now. Number one, every night, when you're about to go to bed, Before you go to bed, it's part of your wind down routine, is part of your evening routine. A lot of people have

talked about the importance of having an evening routine. The reason is because we almost want our body to act like technology. Technology has an off button, we press off and it powers off, but we our off button is more like a power down where we need time to unwind, we need time to slow down. And because we've got so used to using technology, we want our bodies to react and respond like a laptop, like a phone, but it doesn't do that. So when your head it's the pillow,

you're not falling asleep straight away. One part of a great evening routine that can be really powerful for your mental health. And you can do this in a journal. You can do this as a voice note. You can do it out loud with your partner or a roommate or whoever it may be. You can do it over the phone with someone you're close to. But there's one question that you want to answer every evening. What did

I accomplish today? What did you accomplish today? Is the single most important question to ask yourself for your mind in the evening before you go to bed. Now, why is it It sounds obvious, It's like, oh, yeah, I feel accomplished, I feel good about myself, there's a lot more to it. The whole day or in the evening, you are very likely to subconsciously say to yourself, I can't believe I didn't get that done. Gosh, there's so much left to get done. Oh and I didn't even

get to that thing. Oh and I've still got all those emails to reply to. We're so used to noting down all the things that we haven't done, all the things that we didn't achieve, all the things that didn't work out, that we easily simply forget the progress that has been made. So it's not neutral. I think we think we live in a neutral world where we're like, oh, I don't want to pump myself up, like I'm fine, But actually what we're usually doing is putting ourselves down. Right,

So I'm not telling you to pump yourself up. I'm not saying to sit there and say I'm the best, I'm amazing, I did this. It's actually saying what did I accomplish today? Because chances are your mind's already coming up the list or you didn't accomplish, and you might say, all right, I got in a twenty minute workout. I accomplished that today, whereas usually you'd say I only got a twenty minute workout. Notice how we do that right? Even so, it's an accomplishment to get in the gym

to get that workout in. Maybe you got six thousand steps and you say to yourself, I only got six thousand steps instead of I accomplished six thousand steps, Let's go for seven thousand tomorrow. Which one do you think programs you to push a little bit more tomorrow when you're feeling encouraged or when you're feeling put down. Now, chances are when you're feeling put down, you'll sort it out for the next couple of days. But it's not sustainable.

It's not sustainable to constantly speak to yourself negatively and expect a positive result. Let me repeat that again. You can't speak to yourself negatively and expect a positive result. You can't speak to yourself in a way that puts you down to hope that it pulls you up. You can't speak to yourself in a way that is condescending and hope that it's going to make you feel connected to yourself. When we talk bad to ourselves day after day after day, it's impossible for it to lead to

something good. And so when you ask yourself the simple question at the end of every day, what did I accomplish today? Make a list of three things. I got the laundry done, I did some meal prep. I cooked a great meal. I finished off all my email inbox, even though I still know my text is still left. What did you accomplish? What you're doing is rewiring, reprogramming your mind to also not forget the truth. Right, if your friend said to you, Hey, I only got this

done today, you'd be like, that's amazing. You got six thousand steps. Good for you. You made it through the gym for twenty minutes. That's amazing. Right. Your reaction would be so different. And I encourage you to do this with the people you love too. This is something that Raddy did for me when I began my health journey when we were together, especially my physical health. And she was always someone who was committed to going to the gym, committed to her health and well being, and I was

someone who was focused on the mind. And I remember in the beginning, I would still have my sugar addiction. I would still be very much like, oh yeah, I didn't get that done. I didn't get this done, she'd always be like, well, that's amazing, that's great that you made it. That's awesome. Right. And at the same time education, I think we mistake being hard on ourselves as a replacement for education. I'll explain what I mean by that. Fact can hit harder than you being harder on yourself.

Let me say that again, educating yourself in the facts of something can hit you harder than being hard on yourself. What I mean by that is, if someone walks you through the challenging aspects of not working out, if someone walks you through the fact your repercussions of what you're consuming mentally or physically, that fact is more likely to push you into growth than you being mean to yourself with no facts. And so I think it's so important

that we recognize how we're motivated. Now. All of us are different. Some of us may actually like the hard talk and we may need it, and that's fine too, But that doesn't mean we shouldn't go to sleep focusing on what we've accomplished today and recognizing that it is progress. Okay. Number two. This one is also slightly counterintuitive, but I recommend that if you're struggling with your mental health. This month,

plan something for yourself and someone else. Build something. Plan a trip, an event, a charity event, a mental health awareness event, whatever it may be. Do something, plan something, build towards something, Create an opportunity for your mind to be active in working towards something. Hey everyone, it's Jay here. My wife and I have had so much fun create our own sparkling tea Juni, and I've got big news for you. It's at Target and we'd love your support.

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Juny at a Target near you. I think a lot of us believe right now that comfort and not doing anything helps us, and I think that can be true because we're overworked, we're overwhelmed, we're burnt out, and as humans, we're good at oscillating between extremes. Right, We basically go between extremes constantly. We go from I hate myself to

I'm the best person in the world. And in this case, we go from I'm going to do a lot, I'm going to plan a lot, I'm going to be the most productive person in the world at peak performance, I'm the one. And then on the other side of it'side I want to do nothing this weekend, right, And we oscillate between these extremes, and that creates somewhat of a

difficult environment to live in. Now, balance is not necessarily what I'm saying, but what I am proposing is that you're always working on something, and you're not working on it so much that it drains you. You may put it aside when you're working very hard at work, and it's almost like when work's really tough, this may take a back burner because you're already focusing that part of your brain. You're already focusing that part of your energy.

But maybe when works a little slower or medium paced, you're adding this in to give your mind that focus point, to give it that activity, to give it that progress marker. So the reason why I'm planning something is so powerful is because it makes you feel like you're moving. And as humans, we need to feel like we're constantly moving in a direction towards something. Whether we're ambitious or not,

we all need to feel like we're growing. We all need to feel like we are progressing in a direction. And when we choose to plan something, it creates a lot of that forward motion that's pulling us forward. Rather than you pushing yourself, You've now got something in the future pulling you. And I find that that can be a really powerful thing. Of course, you have to pick something that really is important to you. Don't pick to

plan anything. But picking to plan something, what happens. You get to meet people around it, You get to go to new places because of it. You are taking on a new project, and that's where life starts to get more connected naturally. Right. A big part of why we're struggling with mental health today is loneliness. We're feeling disconnected from people. And I found that when you build something with someone, when you do something with someone, it's so

much more magical what you develop as a friendship. I think it's not explored enough today. But when you do something with someone that is active, proactive, building, planning, creating, the memories you build and the bond you build is far more than going to a number of parties with someone. It's just not the same thing. You could go to dinner with someone and it's not the same level as

if you help them move home. Right. You could go to dinner with someone and it's not the same as if you help them change a tire on their car. You could go to dinner with someone and it's not the same as if you put on an event for your community or organized your family's birthday or a getaway trip together. Right, it's just not the same thing. And I think for a lot of us, we're trying to find connection across a table on a couch. And I'm

not saying those things are wrong. I'm not saying they're bad, and we need those things. But I found that the deepest, most powerful relationships I have are ones where we did things together. And I would encourage you all to find a friend. Choose someone or you'll find a friend through the process of planning something, and that what you plan can be small. I'm not saying it has to be thousands of people. It can be a small thing at your child's school, it can be a small thing for

your family at home. But planning something, working towards something, making yourself feel excited about something, because so much of the time we're struggling because we've lost that zest, we've lost that thrill, we've lost that excitement, and it's important that we bring it back. Number three, get better at the things you're good at. A lot of the time, when we're struggling with low confidence, it's because we actually

are experiencing low competence, right. It's competence that builds confidence. It's competence that builds greater self esteem. Confidence by the Dictionary definition, which I love, and by the way, when I pull out a definition, it's because I feel we are so unaware of it. The Dictionary definition of confidence, one of them is a feeling of self assurance, arising

from one's appreciation of one's abilities and qualities. So when you get better at the things you're good at, it's more prominent to you and you're more able to give yourself that self assurance. When we're good at something, we often say, nah, I'm okay at that. But when you're bad at something, you're like, oh, I'm the worst, right? No, is that negativity bias creeping in. If you're good at something, you're like, I'm okay. If you're bad at something, you're like, yeah,

I'm the worst. I'm the worst there possibly ever was, right, And we over hype it so hard. So getting better at the things you're good at gives you a sense of competence and confidence that won't come from anything else. And I think often we feel like, oh, if I got that job, I would feel better. If I was

with that person, I would feel better. There's a lot of things we say to ourselves, if this, then that, right, But what about this idea that actually, when I get better, when I develop better skills, when I strengthen these muscles, when I strengthen these focus points, now I actually feel better about myself. Right, Instead of waiting for something external to happen to make us feel better, we're taking that into our own hands. We're taking accountability, we're taking responsibility.

We're feeling a sense of my behavior matters, my action matters. We feel a sense of autonomy, we feel a sense of ownership, and that's such a powerful thing that we can help develop. So if you're good at something, or someone said you're good at something, go take a course on it, go to an online program on it, buy a book about it, and study it all weekend. Go to an evening class. Whatever it is like, get stuck in. It could be something like pottery. It could be an

art class. Maybe you were great at doing comic book sketches when you were young. It could be a cake baking class. Right, whatever it is, something you enjoy again, You'll naturally meet people again, You'll naturally be learning, you'll naturally be growing. What happens is you're making all of the areas of your life that you're struggling with easier

to do. Now. This point number five is actually something that I came across last Christmas, and so Radi and I we always go back to London and we try and spend a lot of quality time with our family because of course we live in another country and we don't get to see them as much. And so we had taken a little trip to the countryside with our family. And my niece and nephew are eight and four, and they're adorable and wonderful, and my sister in law had

brought them these coloring books. But when you then finish coloring and you struck the pieces together, it was an ornament for the Christmas tree. Now I joined in with the activity, I think I think the whole family did, actually, because we thought we'd had quite a busy run and

this was quite a calming exercise. And then I started looking into some of the research behind it, and I was reading something from Dan Brennan, MD, and he was talking about how actually coloring books are not just for kids. They can be used by adults, and coloring relaxes your brain and improves brain function. He says, when you're coloring, you're focused on the simple activity in front of you. This begins to relax your mind and keep your thoughts

from intruding. Now I found that, especially when I was coloring in between the lines, when I was trying to do something quite intricate, it was really present work. And he goes on to talk about how it induces a meditative state. He mentions that adult coloring doesn't replace art therapy, but it can be therapeutic for some people. Some studies have shown that focusing on the complex structure of your coloring page can help put your mind into a meditative state.

So for those of you that struggle to meditate or struggle to like you know how to meditate, this is a great way of just taking a moment to be more present. He also goes on to say how it improves sleep. Right if you color before bed, Dan Brannan says, you're likely to sleep better than if you scrolled on your phone expose you to blue light from your phone

or tablet. Of course we know that can hinder our quality of sleep, but he says by coloring in a book before bed instead, you're keeping electronics out of the bedroom, allowing your melotonin level to release naturally as your body gets ready for sleep. So there's so many benefits to a simple activity of coloring. Now. I know, as adults

were thinking like what am I going to color? And I found that when it becomes something practical, like we were making an ornament for the tree, or maybe you're creating a birthday card for someone and you might be thinking, no one wants a birthday guard painted by me. Or maybe it is something that you're doing with your kids, or maybe it is something that you're doing with your niece and your nephew. I remember it being a really

wonderful activity. We could all show each other what we did, and everyone chose different ornaments and maybe I did a snowman and you know, they painted something else and it was just a really it's a really special memory that I'm still holding on to as well. And I know it sounds simple, but I think it's going to resonate with some of you, and so I hope you give that a go. This one is something you may have heard, but I'm hoping that some of the research behind it

will change how you feel about it. I was reading a research study that said that since the turn of the millennium, cases of vitamin D deficiency have risen by four hundred and ninety percent. That's incredible. Now, there's lots of reasons for that, and here are some of them. The average time outdoors has fallen fourteen percent between nineteen seventies and twenty tens. Sixteen to thirty year olds have seen the biggest drop in outdoor time twenty percent when

compared to their age bracket in the nineteen seventies. And of course, the average person watches TV or listens to the radio for one hundred and forty seven minutes per day, an increase of thirty seven minutes from time spent in the nineteen seventies. Now that doesn't surprise me. But it's interesting, isn't it. What can we do to be active while we watch that show? Can we be active at home? Can we be active outdoors while we listen to something? What can we do? I know so many of you.

I love, love, love watching all of you out on a walk with your dog. You're cooking while you're listening. Some of you are driving while you're listening. And I think if I could encourage you all to just get outdoors. The National Recreation and Park Association says that whether it's sitting on a park bench or walking local trails, spending twenty to thirty minutes outside reduces stress levels. It's just that twenty minutes outdoors will make a big, big, big difference.

And I will just want you to test it out for seven days. What I want you to do is I want you to choose one of these pieces of insights, and I want you to test them over the next seven days. Or I just want you to test them for the next seven days and see how your life changes. See what switches up, see what progress or movement you feel in your life. And this one's a big one for me. I'm throwing it in there because I learned a lot about this from the Glucose Goddess Jesse and

Chope on the podcast. If you haven't heard that episode, it's amazing. But there's something to be said for the connection between sugar and our mood, and she speaks about it with so much great research and insight. But some of the reasons I came across talked about how One study published in twenty seventeen found that consuming a diet high in sugar can increase the chances of incident mood disorders in men and recurrent mood disorders in both men

and women. And a more recent study in twenty nineteen found that regular consumption of saturated fats and added sugars were related to higher feelings of anxiety in adults over sixty And not only that those study goes on to say, is that it can weaken your ability to deal with stress. The study goes on to say that sugary foods can

actually in the body's ability to respond to stress. Sugar can help you feel less frazzled by suppressing the hypothalamic picititory adrenal HPA axis in your brain, which controls your response to stress. Researchers at the University of California Davis found that sugar inhibited stress induced cortisol secretion in healthy

female participants, minimizing feelings of anxiety and tension. Cortizol is known as the stress hormone, right, So it's interesting to me that if you can monitor your sugar intake, as I said, turned to that expert episode with Jesse and Shape, and we start to recognize these connections between mind and body, there can be a lot we can do for our mental health based on what we eat and what we consume. I am sending you lots of love. I hope that

you shared this episode with a friend. I hope that it's informative to give you some easy, simple ideas that can make a big difference in your life. And remember this, I am forever in your corner and I'm always rooting for you, and I appreciate you deeply. Thanks for tuning in. If you love this episode, you'll enjoy my interview with doctor Daniel Ahman on how to change your life by changing your brain.