Previously on Of Mice and Men and Monsters, a monkey with mechanical wings? You were able to catch a glimpse of Orchid and of Millie, feet kicking, lifted up and dragged away into the air. You didn't seem to be in the proper place to receive this letter. It was a judgment call. Penny looks at the letter and then looks at Bertram and looks at Eowyn and just doesn't know if she knows them anymore. Penny!
You're becoming very wise. I can't hope to lead this group forever. They'll be looking to you. Now, go and find out. We are so desperate to cling to some kind of community, but we're messy in the way that we do it, and we keep messing up. But I love you, Penelope. Do you believe that? Yes, I do believe that. Which is why I need you to act a little better.
to continue healing. I'm almost back, and then we need to go rescue our friends. So how about we just keep this good thing going? And I extend both my hands to you both, and I say, let us bond.
You guys, I'm going to give you a long rest. Hey, don't everybody get excited at the same time? Am I still rested? Have I healed? Are you rested or are you rested? Oh. The last time I got everything back in motion except my right leg. So maybe by the time I wake up, that thing will be fully functional. Maybe. Just for that Kimmy inspiration. This is how I'm starting off tonight. Pun points.
Punny. Punny penny. All right. I have two inspiration points. What? Oh, you can't stack them. Oh, that's right. Use them. You got to use them. You lose it or you lose them. But the thing in the section that lets me type numbers, it's not a check mark. If it were, if it was not, if you couldn't stack them, it would be a check mark. Isn't it just a click it? I'm writing two. You can't tell me. Try to use it. Kate won't remember. I won't remember.
Yeah, I seriously won't. You know what? Test it. There's a highlight. Our listeners will remember and then we're going to be like, no, you gave her extra. It's going to be too late. They all love me. They want this for me. Did Caitlin tell you that at her birthday party recently, someone came and they were hoping you'd be there because they were like, I want to meet the voice of Penny.
Did you hear that? Wait, really? I'm really honored and I'm really bummed. My ankle was so broken that night. It was hurting so bad. She was like, I want to be best friends with Penny. I'm on board. My head whipped around to that person like, excuse me.
We're dear friends. And I was like, excuse me, what about Bertram? Am I right? Am I right? It's because you're actually playing a character and I'm just playing a more petulant version of myself. That's the thing. You're just playing Kimmy. Are you kidding me? You three are playing versions of all yourselves. That's true. It's true. It is true. It is true. All right. You do know us. Now that we all feel seen. Our friends at home, we love you. Yes, we do.
Now that you all feel seen and I've awarded an unnecessary inspiration points. I was getting excited that I remembered in that moment. You know what? Fine. We're going to jump in this. You all get a long rest, but we're going to have the scene enter in where it is nighttime. The gorge lays.
wide and gaping open. Not that far away from you, Adam. Don't make that face. There's no good way for me to describe a gorge around you guys. Anyways, it's not too far away and a fire has been built up. It's crackling merrily and you have a chance to finally just breathe knowing that there's so much to do in the waking hours as soon as the sun rises over the crest of the hill. But for now,
you must tend to yourselves. And it's not just, you know, taking care of yourselves physically, not just taking care of yourselves in that sense that you are maintaining your bodies, but also you have important relationships to tend to as well. So this is where I say, begin the scene. How do you guys want to use and carry out your long rest? Are we around, can we be around a fire?
or like oh yeah i already painted that picture it's crackly merrily yeah i think so awen awen wants to talk to the to the homies um so and as we as we do this i just need you to know this was a extremely important ritual for our druidic circle what we're doing here is forming some kind of new circle a circle for us a circle for the stories that we will tell and the stories that we will protect now
As we hold hands and I look down at my hands and I see, what do I see in Bertram's hand? What does Bertram's hand actually look like? Which hand is Bertram? Oh my goodness. I can't remember which one is which. Well, one of you is holding Bertram's hand. I remember one of you holding is Sybil Vane's hand. I am sitting here. Bertram is on my left. So that means I'm holding Bertram's right hand.
And I don't know which one. If you're on my left, then you're holding my left hand. You're on my left. You're on my left. Oh, oh, oh. Okay, then you're holding my right. I believe, and again, correct me, listeners. I believe my right hand is like this kind of gray steel. My strong hand. It's like my normal Bertram hand, just steel, steel digits. And I believe my left hand, the one that was crushed and I lost, is more of like a maroon plated.
kind of maybe gold and gold inlaid, uh, more of a smaller feminine hand, feminine robot hand. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, cool. Yeah. So I looked down and then I looked down at my other hand in Penny. Is Penny holding my hand or no? Penny isn't quite holding your hand. She's in the circle.
What does that mean, not quite holding the hand? Are you resting your fingertips on his palm? This is what I want. Bertrand looks down. I take your hand. Yeah, you're touching my hand, and I look down at my hand, and I'm like, I'm holding it out to Penny. Penny takes a breath, and without conveying any emotion, just puts her hand in A1's.
And then I do the same. She's going to try. And then I extend my Sybil Vane hand to try and close the circle. All right. You can't just shake your head no. Oh, I thought you said earlier you took my hand. So I assume you grabbed it. Oh, no, no, no. I extend my Sybil Vane hand. Penny eyes it and goes, of your two hands, this is the only one I'd accept. And takes Sybil's hand. Okay. And I say, all right, no.
I need you to close your eyes, and I need you to root your feet down into the ground. And if you've never rooted your feet before, you just press your kind of, you're just like, feel down on the bottom of your feet. What does it feel like down there? Kind of just push all your awareness down in the bottom. Good. Now, by the ties that weave us, by the breath we share, our paths entwine, our strength combined, together we are one.
And I think as I say we are one, if it worked, you would feel kind of like a shimmering kind of heat kind of just roll over you and maybe just like this awareness. So for the people at home that are listening, this is the bond of companionship. And basically what it means is anytime I am within 100 feet of one of the people that I'm bonded with,
As an action, we can see through each other's eyes and hear what they hear until the start of the next turn, gaining benefits in any special senses that you have. Once as a bonus action, you can teleport to the unoccupied space five feet within the bonded creature, and I can cast a spell with a range. Oh, when I cast a spell with a range other than...
originating from myself, I can originate the spell from the person that I am bonded with. And the same is true the other way around. So, fireball. Fireball. But it sounds like if there are multiple bonds, that that two-way bond would have to be chosen by the druid at a long rest. So what are you doing? So if you're the one in control...
And you're getting to decide, if you have to choose one, are you choosing to pair with Penny or pair with Bertram? Well, I don't know if I know it right now. I don't know if I know that. I don't know. Yes. Hear me out. Okay. What if?
you could see chameleon style out of one of each of the eyes. Like split it up? You won't look at me so seriously for a second. I'm like, oh, is this not the moment? I'm so sorry. So you look out and suddenly you would see out of, partly out of Penny and then partly out of Bertram. We'll have to ask Ishmael. We can ask Ishmael how to do that. Yeah, how do I do this? I hurt my brain so much. How disorienting that would be. It would be awful, but it solves our problem.
I think probably like close one eye at a time. Aewyn probably feels an affinity towards Bertram. Cause I, you know, for sure Bertram is willing to do the bond. And like, as it happens, I think his focus is on that connection. And so I think that's probably what happens. Like as the long rest is happening, I can choose to like focus my attention on a part of the bond. And maybe that brings, allows the other person to kind of like,
use those powers if that makes any sense well i would also say too if if this is a win's first time casting this you know he's seen waldo and some of the other higher ups in the circle do this together but he's never been fully invited into this he's seen others do it um he perhaps a win doesn't know
all the mechanics and what it's like to experience it and so perhaps he's just reaching right now and since it needs to be a willing creature he doesn't know when he opens his eyes who he's actually going to be seen out of so that's like up to the spell and the magic to take place versus if this was something that he's done many times before he would know how to direct
that current it's almost like he's like mine is reaching out for someone like i'm physically doing and i'm the one willing to grab on where maybe even though penny is reluctantly holding a hand her intentions aren't maybe is that you know maybe she doesn't want to as much right because it has to be reciprocal like that's that's what i'm seeing with this it needs to go both ways and if it doesn't then it just kind of gets locked up so
When you close your eyes, Zaywin, you are clearly closing your eyes. You're concentrating. Bertram and Penny, how are you guys posturing yourselves during this circle that's really just a triangle? Bertram is like 100% behind this. I think it sounds like Penny wants to maybe mend fences. That takes time. Whereas Bertram wants to like fast forward to like everyone being okay again. So I think I'm trying to like...
like beat this i'm trying to like get i want to get like a gold star and get like 100 on this test so that way i can prove that i'm good and that we're all good what does it look like like describe your posturing like physically as well i'm doing like every time a1 was saying to kind of ground yourself and do these things i'm i'm like going out of my way to try and do i'm doing it so hard and even like i think i've mentioned in the past i can't i don't i don't breathe
But I think I'm trying, I so badly want to take a deep breath that I'm replicating the breathing sounds that he's heard humans or breathing creatures make with a deep sigh, even though he's just recreating it, replicating that sound. So I'm really trying to go 110% of doing what Eowyn said to do. Trying to throw myself into this. And for Penny, how are you posturing yourself?
So Penny is there. Penny's eyes are closed. Her hand, she is holding their hands. She's breathing. She's rooting. She is trying. It's like she's knocking on that door on herself to open, to try, to be willing. But every time she's like trying to focus and to open herself up, she gets flashes. Flashes of Robin going down. Flashes of Crusoe flying away. Flashes of finding the letter.
flashes of the shrieking of the sisters. And these are things that she is actively trying to make peace with, but they are still in the way of her just opening and being vulnerable. So she is there. She's trying. But she's really struggling to focus and to relax. So Ewen, I can see you.
just spreading out that intention. And you feel that familiar nature magic, you know, coming from the ground up, this gentle like shoots of green in your mind's eye, weaving up your legs in a very comforting way, almost like they're blanketing you. And then as they kind of go up your trunk and then start to spread over your chest and down your shoulders,
You feel it start to tingle as it gets to your fingertips, spreading that warmth outward. And it leaves you, and this awareness starts to leave you with that as well. And you can feel yourself almost traveling along your friends, but it halts on one side. On your right, it shoots right back into you.
Almost just like an elastic string snapping taut. But before you can register any confusion or perturbation for this, it flows just down your left side, coalescing and building down there like a torrent of just like these green vines. And then you feel this urge, this tug behind your third eye to open.
Oh, Bertram, you feel the same. Yeah, you feel for Bertram, you feel this tug behind your third eye, too, that you never really thought of as anything there before. But you feel this tug from the inside, this gentle nudge without words to open as well. And I do. Bertram, as you open your eyes.
You see the shocked and yet pleased glance of a robot. A gilded, beautifully painted and decorated, one of the most pristine creatures you've ever seen before. And its hand is classed on one side with yours, and then the other one to Penny. Why are you looking over there?
and just as kind of you straighten up um you feel for the first time the sensation of breath entering into lungs because the cool thing about this especially in the overwhelming sense of magic this will bring kind of like in its first go this overwhelming surge of this connective magic it gives you a glimpse
of not just your sight but all the senses in this new being and for the very first time in your life you take a breath okay beautiful so so i'm not just looking through like a window through his eyes like i am kind of like in his body kind of in a way like i have you're experiencing somebody else's senses
trying to think about like what is happening so i can describe it so you're so you're saying that like like am i am i like a spirit inside you're not able to control it no okay you're just experiencing it there the body itself is very still and almost feels heavy so i'm not like so even like if like i can't turn my head no okay okay okay i'm like a passenger
Exactly. So there's no speech or anything that's going to come out. But yeah, give us some a little bit of like, it doesn't have to be inner monologue, but definitely walk us through Bertram. What is Bertram feeling or reacting to right now? I think it's probably like a sensory overload.
Because all of these senses that did not exist for Bertram are all firing at the same time. Like he's feeling the sensation of like air flooding into the lungs and nerves on arms and fingertips. And actually, and Bertram's able to like feel things, but kind of more in, I don't think it's as
delicate I don't think it's as I don't think it's like a billion nerves or whatever you know kind of all firing I think it's kind of more like pieces or parts that kind of like thud into the ground like his feet thud into the ground like one big piece as opposed to feeling different like standing between like toes or feeling it kind of like flood around every part of him if that makes sense and
Yeah, I think he's kind of rendered speechless at these new sensations. And at that same moment too, Aewyn, when you open, you glance across the way and you see on one side, Penny's there, her eyes still closed. Her eyebrows knotted in concentration or frustration. Sometimes those two bleed together in your understanding of her. And then on the other side, you see an elf with long flowing locks and light blue, almost silvery skin in a
Very familiar looking outfit with all these pockets on it. Wait, that's you. Oh, God. Do I really look like that? Oh, my God. The whole time. That's your inner monologue. I love it. Nobody else is hearing this but us, the audience, and like you. But then once you kind of take that sight in, the other sensations, the other experiences of feeling in this body start to take over, and you realize that you're not breathing, that your fingertips, which are usually calloused and padded,
and have some protection against the outside world feel clunkier to you. That's the best way you could say. It doesn't feel organic to you, and it feels harder and stiffer a bit. And you even go to even feel what it feels like to swallow, and there's nothing there. Yeah, I'm feeling trapped almost.
Yeah, like, entombed, encased. And also, in a way, like, hyper-focused. Really able to see the detail. Really able to, like, take things in for kind of what's going on. I feel the, like, maybe the, I guess you wouldn't feel anything.
And so there's almost this like, if you've ever been in like a float tank or anything like that, it like, it makes all of the other senses really like just alive. Oh, interesting. Or even like, yeah, you really go in your head. So you're really overthinking your, you're just like, that's, it's just the cerebral kind of experience and maybe some like, you know, visual stuff or whatever. Yeah. I think I'm, I think I am tripping.
tripping but in like a weirdly existentially expanding way like this new world is opening up and there's bits of it too that kind of you you catch yourself wandering um in an almost defensive way of trying to temper that panic so using a bit of humor but you remember okay i've i've been a bug before
Against my will. But this is my will. This is something that I meant to do. It's worked. And I'm getting to see through Bertram's eyes. And as that realization comes to full dawning and you start to calm down a bit from this claustrophobia, you feel the pull kind of going backwards. And that warm green energy swathes you and tugs backwards.
But it stops, almost as an invitation. Almost as if it is saying without words in the language that only plants can do. Saying, when you're ready. You close your eyes again, both of you. And when you open them, you're back in your normal body. Staring back into the eyes of each other. Looks of amazement, perhaps.
But you two have just shared something and you look to the side and you see Penny has been unaware, her eyes still closed. I think I take a breath in and I feel a pang of sadness that like Penny didn't or couldn't connect. And at the same time, I've had this like, really what feels kind of like this.
paradigm-shifting experience of like, whoa, Bertram makes so much more sense. I can understand kind of a little bit about what he feels like or what it must be to be him in his shoes. And I think that's pretty jarring. I think Bertram or Ewen is not shaken, but I think there's this moment of like, whoa, there's still a lot I don't understand.
Yeah, I think Bertram would be extremely moved and feeling very grateful to even have a glimpse of what it felt like to be a breathing creature and the benefits that come with that. Feeling more comfortable in my own skin again.
But there is kind of a suffocating quality or you know that there's, it's like if you were, I don't know, blind and you were able to see for a few moments and then you have to go back into the darkness. And those senses that I experienced for a few moments are snuffed out again. But to even have it for a moment was beautiful. And to feel like I know my friend better.
to kind of know what it feels like in a small way to be Eowyn. I think I would be, I can't be moved to tears, but I think I'd be on the brink of whatever that is for Bertram, and I think I would just kind of have a quiet moment of squeezing Eowyn's hand in a silent acknowledgement of what we just went through. Yeah, like a knowing. Yeah. Yeah. Acknowledgement. Yeah. For sure.
I think my instinct was to go for words. And then as soon as you squeezed my hand, it's just like, this is the way. Yeah. Yeah. Is Penny still closing her eyes? Are Penny's eyes still closed? How much time has gone? I mean, this sounds like it's only been like 30 seconds, maybe a minute. Yeah. At most a minute. Yes. I think, yeah, Penny's eyes are still closed.
I think she's lost in a torrent of her own thoughts. So I don't think she's realized yet. So after I would say after that minute, they're probably squeezing hands. I imagine Penny wouldn't know. Penny kind of look opens one eye to kind of see around and sees their eyes open and looking at each other and go. And so Penny just kind of looks. Oh, yeah, that was a wow. That's that's interesting.
Oh, wow. Did you guys feel that too? Penny, what are you talking about? Oh, I mean, I feel so attuned, right? Isn't that what just happened? Isn't that what we just did? Well, something happened, but Penny, I didn't feel it with you. No? Oh, Bertram? No?
I felt definitely a bond with Eowyn, but nothing... I didn't feel much from you. Did you bond with someone? Did you bond with... A goat? Yeah, something else around here. I mean, I don't know. I care about you guys. Maybe it just doesn't work on changelings. Did you drink milk again? Milk? I heard you were... Lactose intolerance. Wow.
I can fuck up the connection, you know? From like a year or two that I'm not remembering. No, I'm just joking. Did you have something? Sorry. No, I just was like, wait, did she have a thing with milk? I don't remember. Yep, that's canon now. That's canon now. She has a... Just yes and it. She gets rumbly-tumbly. You say it, and then she goes like, that's not your business, Aowyn. I'm allowed to indulge, but...
No, I guess. I don't know. Maybe it just didn't work for me. Whatever. It's fine. It's cool. No big deal. I would break from holding Penny's hand and I would turn towards Aewyn and look. I want to look him dead in the eyes. Aewyn, what did you see when you looked at yourself? Well, I saw a lot of
my own insecurities, and I saw a lot of the ways in which I've been thinking about the world that are maybe not as useful than I thought it was. To be honest, it's really hard to even speak. I felt this overwhelming sense of focus and just the way that you see the world so hyper, just right here, right now, no crazy messages from all over the world coming in.
mixing it up in your brain just right here. Wow. Oh, I'm just a little shook. I'm sorry. What about you? I mean, what did you feel? I just saw steel and bolts and I saw someone hiding behind walls of steel for so long. I feel like I... For so long, when I was created and when I lived with the Featherfoot family, for so long I had to live behind these protections. I had to protect myself. I couldn't let anyone in, really.
Until I did, eventually, but in the world of aristocrats and the higher class, everything, any information is a weapon that could be used against you. Something that could be flung back at you, thrown in your face. It's like a game of chess, or maybe a game of cards where you have to hide what you have, what you're holding. And for so long I had to hide
Behind insecurities and hide behind... Snocky comments. Until that is just what I became. This... Wall of steel. Too afraid to let anyone see the real me. I saw... I saw a sad robot.
I saw a sad elf. Thank you, Eowyn, for doing that. That was a lovely experience. Thank you for doing that, Bertram. Thanks for being willing. But listen. Penny? Oh, no, no, no. I was just going to narrate something. Penny just sort of sits standing there looking at the two of them. And she's definitely realized she missed something.
And doesn't know fully how she feels about it yet. She knows something. This was good. But she still isn't quite there. But this is good. She sees that this was good. She sees this was a good thing. I've got to ask. How stoked is Eowyn right now that he got to be inside Bertram?
He's pretty, like, honestly, he took mushrooms and it was, like, a way wilder ride than he thought it was going to be. But in, like, a terribly good way. Like, it was, like, so scary. But in a great way. Yeah, it's hard to explain. I liked how you described it about feeling, like, suffocating or, like, claustrophobic. Because going from someone who's like...
who your essence and body is like is spiritual and tied to like nature to then be kind of like boxed up in like steel with senses instantly cut off. Yeah. I could see that being very, um, yeah, scary until you realize that it's just temporary and you're trying to like just embrace the now knowing that this isn't forever. Yes. Yeah. That's exactly it. All right, y'all.
Shall we go to bed? Shall we finish this night out? Yeah, I thought that was good. Get some rest. All right. Then, you know, Eowyn, you go to meditate. Penny, you go to sleep. Bertram, you go into sleep mode. I want to go stare at the gorge. Okay. Not too close to the edge, please, for all of us. I'm going to go, yeah, stare off and think.
Friends, half-orcs, countrymen, lend me your pointy ears! Hey, welcome to 2025. It is I, your master teacher, and I have returned to you after our holiday break to say I missed you, and I'm glad that you're here. I'm glad that because... We're going to kick it off with the next installment of our Wizard of the Oz arc. And I hope that you are enjoying it. And I'm, yeah, I'm looking forward to where this twisty, windy road goes. And really just to just pause here at the break to say...
I love that you're here and I hope that you continue with us. And if you find it in your beautiful, big, pulsating heart to leave us a rating or review wherever you are listening to this podcast, oh, what a way to kick off the year. Am I right? Just to take a few seconds to click how many stars or hearts or thumbs up or whatever.
your listening platform uses to measure audience engagement enjoyment would be wonderful for us. And then if you have like 30 more seconds to drop a couple lines telling others what you are enjoying about listening to this so that might pique their interest in our little indie podcast, well, all the better. But anyways, I just want to say that we are glad you're here and we love you guys as our audience and look forward to seeing where this goes because
Things are ramping up. I actually have to create a climax, don't I? So, gotta put my rider hat on. But until then, let's jump back in. That's enough of me. Let's get back to the show, shall we? And now morning does arrive. And you three are past the gorge. You have, at least for the two of three of you, you have established a deeper connection that you can use very well mechanically, but also perhaps will provide some more healing for each of you as well.
And as you pack everything up and straighten and start up the only path that's available to you, you emerge around the corner in sight of a watchtower. There it stands, carved by an earlier civilization's hands out of this living rock. And this narrow mountain road that you're on leads up, you can see, to the main gate of the watchtower, winding its way through a hillside.
Field of poppies. I invite you guys to roll history or nature right now. So go ahead and let me know what you roll in addition to what your result is. I rolled history. History or nature. 23, nat 20. Oh, dang. Very historical. I'm good at history, but I'm not going to beat a nat 20. There are multiple things.
There are? Okay, then I'll roll that too. No, that wasn't good. 17. For nature or history? Nature. I rolled an 8 for history. Alright, so I'm going to kind of go up the rolls. So Bertram, looking back, especially after a whole night looking over this gorge, you had in that...
perusal of even the side of the bridge that used to span it, almost like a soundtrack plays in your mind. And you recall one of those portraits of Dorian Gray, and he had been talking about his kinsmen working with the Benamucky civilization to build an outpost and a nearby bridge that spanned a gorge.
looking at all the signs there and connecting it to just imagery that you had seen at Dorian Gray's strongholds, you realize like this must be that. This must be the remains of that long ago built bridge. And therefore this outpost must be connected to that Benamaki civilization. Penny, with your nature of 17.
You recognize signs of these. You've seen these poppies before. And I would say, in fact, you've seen them used in trade for the black market, for the underbelly, the seedy underbelly of the city. These actually do come in high.
but you've never seen them in their natural state. That these poppies, if they're trod upon, if they are crushed or disturbed in any way, that they release a pollen that is soporific or causes sleep. And then with that nat 20, You too recognize this watchtower that you're looking at, Aewyn, but more specifically, you had noticed that there was a rendering of this watchtower that you had kind of like passed by, clocked, not put too much effort into really...
doing more than clocking it at Dorian Gray's. But you did remember that that specific drawing had shown a side door for some reason and not a main causeway of it. And that that door had been specifically adorned and decorated by Dorian Gray himself with some wordings. And you're having a hard time remembering the...
the stenciling on it that was on that specific drawing. But you do remember which side of the watchtower that it would appear on. And in your mind's eye, you also remember the day before seeing your friends carried specifically in this direction. So all three of you have different information. How do you share this? Or do you share it?
What was the thing about carried there the next day that you just said? The previous day. The previous day, both you saw, this was the direction that Millie and Mildred. Oh, right. Okay, right. Were carried by the flying monkeys. Okay, perfect. This looks similar. I don't know. It sounds like something that Dorian Gray described with the Benamonkeys.
Yeah. Some sign of a lost civilization. He definitely made the wards on that clock on the watchtower. I mean, at least I can remember. I don't know exactly what they are, but it is warded, and there's a side tower door. I don't have any other ideas, so...
might as well head up. And she starts heading in and then she kind of looks at her shoulder and she's like, don't touch the poppies. It's not a good idea. And she starts walking up towards the watchtower. Yep. Follow. Okay. So as you go through, I'm going to have each of you roll a constitution saving throw.
never good it's not ever a good thing to have to do a saving throw bad coming for you 15 16 okay all three of you oh geez 16 out of 15 um all three of you um oh can we read can we redo that actually sorry um i'm gonna need so back up this is actually a good thing for you um first As you start up this mountain path, trying to weave your way through these vibrant poppies, I'd like each of you to make a wisdom saving throw. Okay. 22. Seven. Five. Penny and Bertram. You, even despite...
Penny's pre-existing knowledge of these things. Despite her warning, the two of you, this specific hue almost seems to be hypnotic. And it draws you in. They're so luscious. They seemed like they must smell so good. And Bertram, last night, just being in an organic body that could breathe and therefore smell, you almost want to relive that.
Just as you are heading towards it, you look over your shoulder to ask Ewen if he could perform that ritual with you again so that you can sniff a flower. And the two of you step right in the middle of one of the patches, just off of the path. So the two of you have disturbed it. And now I'm going to ask the two of you to make a con saving throw. Ooh.
Cool. Redo. Awen, you get to do it with advantage since you are just out of range and can maybe duck the worst of the pollen. 19. 16 for me. Oh. Sorry. I rolled and then I set my phone down and it was a different number and I realized I dropped my phone and rolled. So I got really excited for a moment.
But no, it's not good news. I got a five. That was a journey, but I hope it was worth it. Bertram, for one of the first times, it is a good thing you can't breathe, perhaps. It is a good thing that nothing is there, that is completely taking everything in, and your body almost reflexively even shuts down parts of it that would draw in small particles and small pollen.
something perhaps that he who created you put in as a protective reflex. But Penny and Aewyn, you two get a whole lung full. Oh, Aewyn, I thought he didn't have to roll since he... Oh, he got to roll with advantage and he's still... Oh, wait, did me and Penny get to roll with advantage? No. Oh. Because you're right in the middle of them. Oh, well, then I didn't roll that high of a number. Oh.
What did you roll? Sorry, you said it all at the same time. I thought you said Eowyn didn't have to roll, so it was just us rolling with advantage. No. Oh, I rolled like a 7. Oh, okay. Let me re-say that. I rolled a 17. What did I roll? 17? You rolled a 16. Oh, yeah, that's right. Damn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. Sorry to retake that. My bad.
Ewin, you barely have time to shout out a warning as you see your compatriots start to trod right through it. And a spray of this dander and pollen rushes into the air in this whirly maelstrom. And then, almost supernaturally, it just starts to surround the three of you. And you feel yourselves pulled down, down, down. Bertram.
When you kind of open your eyes back up, they feel so heavy. And you see behind you is the darkened field of poppies you've passed safely through. You're on the other side. Although, you've suffered many discouragements. And before you is a lovely, sunny country that seems to beckon you on to the Emerald City. And as you step forward along this path,
You come along to the figure of Penny. Her back turned toward you. And upon hearing your approach, she turns, smiling brilliantly. And your heart is filled with this love and this warmth. But then she raises a knife in one hand and throws straight at your heart, or at least where it should be.
And you fall down, down, down into this cascade of petals. Penny, you open your eyes, heavy as they are. It's almost a struggle. And all around you is golden light. You can feel with your hands, but the light itself blocks out all sights and sounds, yet it's still so soft and inviting that you find yourself soothed.
Under your fingers, you feel something so familiar that you begin to hold on and draw it toward you. Sunshine is trapped in your heart, and as you feel the buzz of all the wonder in the world, you feel yourself beginning to float upward. Ewin, you feel warmth, but different from last night. It's not an inviting warmth. It's almost like a...
overpowering warmth. It's like fire. You sniff the air, although your eyes are still shut. And as you struggle to open them, you just catch glimpses of flames dancing in front of you. And you hear the words, Well, there's no place like home. And you feel yourself pulled down.
Don't like that. By the way, when you're pulled down, Eowyn, how do you react? What is your initial reaction to that? You say you don't like it, but what are you doing? Oh, I mean, it's like everything clenches. Everything clenches and I'm trying to catch myself. And as you're clenching,
start to feel this this heat almost build to an intensity and the crackling sound also crescendos and then it stops as you feel this tiny slap on your cheek and it starts to ebb away slap again on your cheek and you kind of feel your head snap lightly from side to side and it starts to dissipate and the heat ebbs away
And you see blinding light above you. And cracking your eyes open, you see this chameleon sitting on your nose. Hey! And he slaps you again. Hey! Wake up! Ishmael is there on top of you. Yes? Ishmael? Is that you? And he slaps you again.
I can do this all day. I don't want you to do it all day. This is actually kind of fun. No, no, no. My head is hurting. Wake the fuck up. No, don't wake the fuck up. What happened? What happened? God, man. He's got in the poppies. I can't drag you. Look at me. I got these little hands, okay? I can only slap them. All right. I shoo him off a little bit, try to get up. Yeah, and he topples down your front. He's like, oh, fuck.
It's like buds onto the, on the soil. Look, you, you're on the, you're on the edge. You're on the edge. So kind of like clear head, but also can you get your pals out? Where? I've been dropped here for like half a day. Okay. I can't get to Millie. Yeah. Where's, where's Penny? Where's Bertram? They're back there. Look at them. Look at those sleeping like babies.
Oh, my God. Yeah, I walk over to them. I walk over to Penny first. I try to, like, wake her up. You just walking over there? All right, roll a con save, my dude. Oh. Oh, God. Yeah, I mean, I would. I would just be. I feel so fucked up. Like, this is how I feel. Down, down, down you go. You need to take three steps and you drop back down. Go ahead and roll a con save. Twelve. Oh.
You feel yourself go down and you're revisiting that same horrifying scene until you feel these tiny little leathery digits slapping your face again. Fuck! Just wake up! Let me be. Why are you on the edge, you idiot? No, I'm not leaving you be. We gotta get Millie. Wake the fuck up. It hurts.
Now he's like grabbing your eyelid open and he's slapping your eyeball. Oh, geez. Small hands. I'll get in there. My worst nightmare. Don't get in there. Don't get in anywhere. But is he doing it with those cute hands, though? He is. Yeah, yeah. It's forgettable, right? They're so luscious and I hate it. All right. I attempt to stand up and I want to like... Okay.
Use my sling. Hang on. Hang on. Yeah. Hang on, you idiot. All right. Like, before you stumble back in there, all right, don't breathe in. See those spores? See all that shit in the air? The dander, the spores, and all that other magical shit they have in there. That pollen, it's swirling around those two out there. You were in the middle, just like, well, they were in the middle of it. You were on the edge of it.
got you out. I didn't drag you. You're just writhing around shouting out something weird about home. Okay. So I'm lucky that you were like flop around. They're dead to the world. Not dead. Hopefully dead, dead, but you know what I mean? What are you going to do? Stop breathing in that shit. I'm not trying to breathe it. I'm not trying to breathe it in, but yeah, stop breathing it. You got to stop doing it. Oh man. I, I try to just like,
I guess I just put my shirt over my nose as a filter. I want to try to cure wounds. Let's see. No, it's just HP. Can I perception check what's around to try and see how I can throw them a rope or something? Find a fan?
Roll perception. You can also roll survival. Okay. That's a 14 perception check. Yeah, looking around you, you see like you're right on the edge of the hill. Sorry. Looking around you, you see you're right on the edge of this poppy field. And you're more towards the wooded area. And so behind you are some trees.
And though not high in their expanse, they do have the type of trees that have the bark that easily rips off in long strips. And you see just beyond that a small, rushing, babbling brook. Okay. These ideas are really bad, but this is where we are now. So I am going to...
look through my spells really quick. Oh my gosh. Okay. So I, I have this spell called fabricate and it allows me to convert materials into products of the same material. Um, and what am I going to make? So, okay. So they're in a bed, they're just in a field of poppies that are just like right in the middle, take you down right in the middle.
Okay. And it's in the air? Mm-hmm. There's probably an easy way out of this, but I create maybe like a fan or something like that that I can just blow. I truly have no idea here. It's so bad. This is D&D, my dude. It's only as you imagine it, it happens. Yeah. I think I...
Yeah, I have a fan and then I make two little like snowshoe things. And I'm going to wrap my face with... What do I have in my... Oh, what do I have in my inventory? Hang on a second. What is the ramble tonic? You got a green hood. You got a green hood. You do have a green hood. What is the ramble tonic?
it's a harm that's to get people to talk yeah the the the ramble tonic is to get people to tell the truth okay yeah so oh yeah yeah i'm just gonna i'm gonna do the like snowshoes and i'm gonna like wrap my head with a with like a cloth to kind of filter out as much as i can and i'm just gonna be like waving my fans and like crop circling this thing trying to like get them out
All right. I'm going to say you do that to get to them. Okay. So the closer one to you is Bertram. Okay. And so you get to him first. And so as long as you keep moving your arms and flapping the wind around, none of it touches you. None of it comes in your direction. So I like kick him. I like walk up to Bertram and I just like, I'm fanning and I just like.
use my foot to kind of like shove him a little bit. See if I can wake him up. You do that and he kind of moans a little, like kind of groans as a, like a, like a child in sleep. Penny, Penny, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Penny. Bertram. Bertram. Don't breathe in.
I don't know how you're asleep. Don't breathe in. For the audience listening, Aaron's acting while just continuously fanning his hands. Lucky has the worst part. He cannot fan away. Get it out of here. And then I try to go over to Penny and try to do the same thing. Kick her feet. Or try to kick her a little bit while I'm fanning. She just immediately rolls onto her stomach.
And Jets curls in. You hear Ishmael from the edge going like, you're going to have to do a lot more damage than that. I was like slapping you for five minutes. I enjoyed it. But, you know, try something harder than just nudging them with your toes. You're barefoot. I cast tiny servant and one of my teeth pops out of my head and big tooth daddy like hops down onto Penny's face and just starts like poking, poking her with the teeth fingers things. Get a big tooth daddy. Wake up somehow.
As you're floating in this like golden ether that feels like half the time it feels so soothing to you and the other half you feel like disturbed by where you are, but you almost like can't open your eyes, Penny. You start to feel this poking on your face and you feel your body descending back down to the earth. And with a very decisive poke straight up your nostril, you shoot too and your eyes fly open.
Okay. What? Where? Okay. Penny. What is going on? It's the poppies. They fucked us up. You got to get out. I can only wave these fans so fast. If I get up and step anywhere, will I just fall asleep again? You got to get out. You got to go fast because I can't fan anymore.
I loved your dedication, Erin. I loved your dedication. You're really acting it out. He's so good. Penny, you roll up to a sitting position, and you see not five feet from you, Bertram still kind of just in this prone position, murmuring your name to himself. Penny notes that he's saying her name, and it's gratifying.
Okay. He's thinking about it. Good. He should be. I'm trying to decide. You hear Ishmael's voice. Slap him. Punch him. Kick him. Can you please hurry it up? My arms are fucking so tired. I'm about to leave you guys, okay?
wait this is me genuinely asking if i just step away one foot away from him that won't i go down again we have to go as a group no so yeah you you've what what a1 has done for you is to create this circle of like just fresh air yeah so yeah he's he's creating just like this this eye of the the hurricane that is pollen this pollen hurricane eye for you guys
So I would say like, it's about, it's about like nine feet, uh, across. So did I, did I wake up too? You're not, you're, you no longer have it surrounding you, but you haven't been woken up. Okay. I haven't been, I haven't been abused enough. No, all, all I saw, all I, the DM saw was like a nudge with a bare foot. I sent Big Tooth Daddy over after Penny's awake to, uh, just kind of tweak on, uh, Bertram a little bit of wake him up.
My arms are getting real tired. Big Tooth Daddy tweaks on Bertram. Yeah. Tweak it hard. Big Tooth Daddy tweaks on Bertram. And Bertram, you feel yourself as you're sinking down, down, down in this despair, being pulled up abruptly, pulled up by, interestingly enough, your nose. Someone's sticking you in the nose. How many knives do you have? Penelope? Oh. Oh. Where are we? What happened?
I mean, we all just like kind of got knocked down. Anyway, why are you fanning your arms so vigorously? There's a lot of these fucking poppies. And if you breathe them, we all fall over. So if I don't stop, we're all going to be really going to be tired again. Hey, the three of you, get the fuck over here. I go so fast. Follow me or else you'll be down and I will not come back. I'm so tired. I don't know why this is the fun thing.
I'm trying. I'm trying to keep it safe. It's like you're just karate chopping in front of your face. No sense. This is not how you fan anything, but for him being visible on Zoom, it's so nonsensical. I would have these two big interconnected fans. It's like a bellows or something. I like how you've done.
almost the bare minimum, and you're already over it. You're like, you know what? Fuck it. Fight for yourselves. Sorry to just leave you here. I'm just tired, guys. We have fought the biggest, baddest vampire creature, whatever, for these poppies. I will leave you here to die. Fuck these flowers. We're not even bonded anymore. Oh my God. In any kind of moment of clarity, I cast Misty Step on myself.
And I misty-step myself to the path, back to the path. Inside my body, I feel like I could bring myself to be where Bertram is. So I run over to Penny. And how does teleport work? Can I teleport myself and Kimmy?
Like if I'm touching something, does it go with me? Telefriend D&D? I don't know. I mean, I know like the teleport spell is you can do it with willing creatures. And this Penny is willing. Okay. If you get her consent, I will allow it. Okay. I guess like Penny, I gotta fucking stop Penny.
It's so hard for me. I've never developed these muscles. And this is a really inefficient fan that I made out of that tree. Okay? I'm barely alive. Just hold on to my leg and I'm going to teleport us out of here. All right. And Penny tries to avoid being hit by the fans and just grabs his leg. As soon as I feel or touch my leg, I just teleport straight to Bertram. Oh, my God. It took you three long enough.
Did you really need to lay there for so long? My arms are so tired. Penny is absolutely worth it. Absolutely worth it. You'll thank me later. Never skip arm day. When you feel this little scampering up your leg.
Ishmael is going to crawl up your leg and then up to the side where he crouches on your shoulder as you've seen him do so many times with Millie. Took you long enough. Jeez. First you poke him with your toe and then you fan him with, what the hell are those? Listen, I was so fucked up from the puppies that I didn't know what to do. And I was just doing it live, you know? Also, I like hold my mouth open a little extra longer, like, you know?
Like that. And then I'm just waiting for Big Tooth Daddy to run up my shirt and just pop right back in. Oh, God. As Big Tooth Daddy runs by, Ishmael puts out a little forked hand and they high five. They clap. Ishmael, where did you come from? Where did you go? I got dropped, man.
Well, I came from Millie, right? Drop me. You're a familiar to Millie, right? So you can sense, like, do you have a connection? Are you able to know where they are? I mean, usually, yeah. And in that connection, I can go straight to where she is, like, poof, and I'm right there. Something's wrong. I can't poof to her. But I sure as hell can feel where she's at. Are you sensing her close?
I mean, she's in that big fucking thing, and he points over at the watchtower. Oh. She's in there. Do you know how many monkeys there are in there? I mean, I've seen a few flying in and out. Let's see. Let me count on my fingers. Multiples of six. One, two, three. There's more than there's fingers that I have.
Oh, no. All right. Well, we better hurry. I don't know how much time we have. They're probably torturing those poor creatures. I mean, you've seen... You've seen... What's her name? The Dragonborn. I don't even know what her name is anymore. Mildred? Orchid. Orchid. Orchid? Yeah, whatever name that you guys reinvent for her. Yeah. She does not hold up well to questions. Even friendly questions.
She must have crumpled long ago. We better hurry. Yeah, we need to hurry, okay? So, anyways, can he kind of pass the side of your head? Mind if I hitch a ride on you for a bit? No problem. The fanning seems to really be working, though. Can you just fan ahead of us? I'm going to fan us. Do not stop. For friendship, I'll fan. Do not stop until we get through this, Peppy.
Do not stop until we get through this poppy field. I'll fan us the whole way. Penny, didn't you have a broom? In my head, they're just splitting as he comes through. Like Moses and the Red Sea, they just part in front of him. And that is just how the three of you progress.
A scraggly-looking elf in the front with a small chameleon on his shoulder fanning the air in front of him as these pollen particles part the way. A 19-year-old girl with a sardonic smile, a quirked eyebrow, and what is Fezziwig again? Hedgehog. Is Fezziwig with us? Always. Fezziwig is always with us. He's in our heart. I should have sent him to poke you. It was a missed opportunity. And a hedgehog poking its tiny little head out of her front pocket, followed up by a tin man.
And the three of you, or now four of you, we should say, or Fezzawig, sorry, five of you, make your way down this now... Big Tooth Daddy. Sorry, six of you. Well, how many Big Tooth Daddies are there in your mouth at any given time?
There's just one Big Tooth Daddy? Yeah, it's just mine. So Big Tooth Daddy and Fezziwig are always with us. And Francis. Oh, that's right. He isn't here yet, but it's in my heart. Jesus. Okay, you know what? No. He's with us in spirit. Screw all the small friends. You know what? The three of you are making your way down this path. He's with us in Draconic Spirit. Behind a gust of winds. And if you were to look behind you as the pollen settles on the mountain path behind you, it looks like yellow.
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